Shit I’ve Heard High Schoolers Say
- Why stop at capitalism? Destroy everything.
- Guys it’s been three weeks since I’ve eaten a vegetable
- At least we have memes to dull the pain of existence
- An AP student: Oh my god I thought seven was less than six
- (while filling the cap of their water bottle with water) SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS
- friend one: If all your friends jumped off a bridge wou-
friend two: probably
- I’M GONNA GO HOME AND DRINK A WHOLE GLASS OF WEED
- If cows ruled the world would they drink human milk?
- student: my calculator is broken
teacher: your calculator isn’t broken, you’re broken
- no actually I think you have to be of age to be considered a cougar
- (during math class on the second floor) student 1: so like how far do you think the distance is from that window to the ground?
student 2: enough
- teacher: has anyone ever been to New Orleans?
Student: does Popeyes count?
- my word count on this paper isn’t very high but I certainly am
- we’re in adult limbo. I’m not a teen and I’m not an adult. I’M SUFFERING, THAT’S WHAT I AM!
- Look at my… (swings leg up to show shorts) not pants