A Way to You Again: Part 13
Pairings: Bucky x Reader
Word Count: 1215
Summary: Bucky and Y/N have been fairly successful at keeping their relationship hidden from the rest of the Avengers. That is… until Nat walks into the kitchen one night and finds Bucky kissing Y/N. While Y/N is relieved that their relationship is out in the open it soon becomes more complicated than she could have ever imagined.
Author’s Notes: Thanks to the lovely @melconnor2007 for the request! Sorry it took me forever to get this part done. The senior portrait rush is over – so I should have more time to write again, yay!
Bucky needed to see that he wasn’t the only one with ghosts. Mine still haunted me to the point that they had nearly torn me away from him completely. As I walked to my bedroom his words echoed in my mind, “Ever the optimist – one day that optimism is going to get you killed…” Little did he know how close he was to being right.
We drove through most of the night. We spoke occasionally – small pleasantries or about the towns we passed, but we always lapsed into silence again. As we pulled onto the gravel driveway I sighed with relief. This time it was a different type of relief to see the little cottage. I wasn’t running away – I was really coming home. Home with someone I loved. “This is it,” I said with a yawn as I parked the car. I blinked sleepily at Bucky as I stretched.
“You go ahead – I’ll get the bags,” he responded with a reassuring nod.
I made my way up the uneven path – my limbs feeling abnormally heavy. More than anything I wanted to lay in the feather soft bed that awaited me and sleep for hours. I wearily opened the door and sighed to myself. It was just as I had left it – always waiting for me. I walked in with Bucky following me hesitantly. He stared around the cottage appreciatively as I watched him.
“So I’m beat… I think I’ll get some rest,” he said awkwardly as he motioned towards a hallway that led to the guest room.
“Oh… I honestly didn’t have this planned so I didn’t call ahead. The room is probably a mess – between Steve and Nicole staying there. Would you… like to maybe stay with me?” I asked shyly as I peeked through my lashes at him – a small awkward smile tugging at the corners of my lips. I wasn’t sure why I felt so shy suddenly – maybe it was the way his eyes sought after every bit of me in their tired stare, or maybe it was the way the corner of his lips quirked into a smile he fought to hide when he watched my tired movements.
“Okay sure,” he added softly as he laid the bags down by the front door. I walked awkwardly to the bedroom where I gratefully shucked my pants and quickly snuggled into the down comforter. My exhaustion had certainly not kept me from noticing Bucky standing up a little straighter when welcomed by my bare legs. He in turn shed his shirt and jeans before climbing in beside me. He smiled as he brushed the hair from my face before I quickly fell asleep.
I awoke to the deepening shadows of twilight as I stretched my tired limbs. Panic gripped me for a moment as my hands noted the empty side of the bed. My tired mind immediately went into a free-fall. Had I dreamed it all? Had I been here the entire time without him? A soft knock at the door caused my body to relax.
“Come in,” I yawned as I stretched my tired limbs again. Bucky’s head peaked into the room shyly before he opened the door fully to walk in.
“I thought you might be hungry so I ran up to the diner and ordered some food.” My stomach growled loudly at the thought of food – eliciting a laugh from Bucky. “I will take that as a yes,” he smirked as he turned on his heel and made his way back to the living room. I chuckled to myself as I pushed off the bed and followed him.
He had ordered a ridiculous amount of food – enough to probably last us for days. In fact, I was almost certain that he had ordered one of every burger the diner had. “So are the seven dwarves coming to eat supper too, or?” I asked with a smirk as I plopped down in the empty dining room chair beside him.
“Huh?” he responded in confusion. Sometimes I forgot how different our worlds had been.
“Never mind,” I chuckled as I reached for a burger and fries. I couldn’t remember a time I had been so hungry in my life. While I was contemplating if it was physically possible to unhinge my jaw and devour the burger in one bite I caught Bucky’s glance in the corner of my eye. “What?” I asked as I felt a blush threaten to spread up my neck and to my cheeks.
“Oh it’s nothing,” he shrugged with a small smile before returning to his food.
After dinner was over Bucky insisted that he would clean the kitchen – even though, as I pointed out through my many protests, I was the one that knew where everything was. As he busied himself in the kitchen I made my way outside to start a fire. One of my favorite things as a child had been to sit around a cozy fire on the beach as the sun set. There had always been something magical about it – and I had always dreamed about the day that the person next to me would be the man that I loved. I smiled to myself as I set to work on my task.
Bucky found me sitting in front of the fire when he came outside to join me. I was entranced with its flames as I watched them dance upwards into the pastel sky. I jumped slightly as the blanket he had brought me wrapped around my shoulders.
“Sorry,” he chuckled softly as he sat beside me. “I noticed it had gotten cooler – I wanted to make sure you were warm,” he added with a soft smile which I returned earnestly. I returned my gaze to the fire as we lapsed into silence. I was completely lost in thought when Bucky finally spoke again. “It’s beautiful here,” he whispered quietly as his hand brushed against mine.
“Yes it is,” I responded as I smiled softly at him. “This is the one place I’ve always been able to find comfort. The one place that I have left that is full of memories of my family,” I whispered sadly as I turned to look at him. “How much did Fury tell you before I joined the Avengers?”
Bucky seemed taken aback by the sudden change in topic. He shrugged as he thought to himself. “It seemed pretty basic overall. You started working for S.H.I.E.L.D. right out of high school after being highly recruited by several top administrators in the program, Fury and Coulson included. You were a rising star in S.H.I.E.L.D. before it fell. Didn’t have a family – which come to find out was a bit of a lie, but I never fully trust Nick when he tells me the backstories of other people,” he explained.
“I…” I began awkwardly. I wasn’t certain where to begin, but I knew if Bucky was willing to show his most vulnerable side to me then it was time that I did the same for him.
“Y/N – you don’t have to,” he began as he squeezed my hand affectionately.
“Bucky – if you love me – there is something you should know,” I whispered as I prepared to recount things that I had hoped I would never speak of again.
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