hey remember when my two favorite people dated for eight years me too

8

“So much has changed since I first sat down and began to write this book. I’ve changed. I got arrested recently and to be quite honest with you it wasn’t as much fun as I thought it would be. I got a new dog and I named her Audrey. I found a girl (a real girl) that I’m in love with, and if you can believe it, she loves me back. I’m looking at her right now, in fact. She bought me a new computer and on the desktop there’s this picture of her on the beach. She and I and a bunch of our friends went to Hawaii recently. I had never been there before and I enjoyed myself very much. We had a house right on the beach. A couple of days into it, while sitting in the shade nursing my new sunburn, she decided to try surfing for the first time. And needless to say it was quite a funny sight. If you’ve never seen someone take their first surfing lesson before, then drop this book and everything else you’re doing immediately and arrange it. It’s well worth it. On one of her many tumbles into the ocean a friend of ours must have snapped a picture of her. Her butt is on the board as she’s washing ashore and she has this smile on her face. It looks like you’ve just surprised a five-year-old with a truck full of candy. I’m talking ear to ear. Every time I turn on my computer and I see this picture it makes me happy. I know how lucky I am to have someone that makes me feel that way, believe me. I’m lucky to have her. My point is I didn’t have her or that picture when I started making this book.”