So he always has food around his room, and one day he had this orange sitting by my desk. A few days go by and the orange is still there. I said, “hey when are you gonna eat that thing?” And he explained that he always forgets that it’s sitting there. Then he comes up with the idea of drawing a face on it. Now, he’s a terrible artist, but he actually drew this really funny “I’m done with your shit” face on it.
So everytime anyone in class said something stupid, he’d look at me and hold up the orange, like “are you fucking kidding me” and eventually it turned into just saying “orange”.
A few days ago he threw the orange out because it was getting old, and I was joking about having a funeral for our fallen. Then today some kid in class threw his desk at the wall, screamed, and then walked out. I just looked at F like, where’s the orange. This is when you use the orange. But it’s not here anymore.
Then he asked me to stay after class and said, look I got you something. It was a new orange with a fucking face on it. When he left work yesterday, he went out of his way to go buy me an orange.
He got me. A fucking orange.
You can keep your jewelry, because I have an orange.