hey chandler

anonymous asked:

cici x chandler

SEND ME A SHIP AND I’LL TELL YOU ─

where was their first date ? on a boat in hyde park. abel was there to make sure no one drowned.
what my muse would do to cheer your’s up ? cici shows him pictures of jen in lingerie bc that always cheers her up.
who wakes the other up with kisses ( and where ) ? chandler once tried kissing cici on the forehead while she slept and immediately her eyes opened n he got a nice kick.
who would pour water on the other to wake them up ? cici is all about baptising chandler awake.
who would start a food fight while baking or cooking ? neither bc why would they ever be baking when abel is literally right there.
who would suggest putting marijuana in the brownies ? chandler tries it and cici calls his sister and tells her that he’s experimenting with heroin. 
who said i love you first and how ( or when ) did they say it ? chandler thought this is what cici meant when she said “go penis !” until abel told him that was actually her breaking up with him for the week.
who would get into a physical altercation over the other ? both but mostly for the memes.
who insists on purchasing a pet together ( and what kind of pet ) ? after ethan and mari bring their bunny to the turn up function, chandler suggests they get one. cici still thinks the plan is to eat it. don’t tell the vegan cult.
who is louder ( in and out of bed ) ? chandler’s louder in general but smexually, the issue is weird finishing faces.
who takes more risks ( in and out of bed ) ? they both need to calm down irl (chandler more visibly, bc cici is always doing extra shit in disguise) but cici has read one too many mandy fics and it shows.
who would bring up the word ‘daddy’ first ? chandler as a joke between pictures of pants in ims but cici immediately calls him and starts yelling so that’s cancelled.
what is their shared, favourite kink ? it’s horrible.
who is more dominant ? cici.
who sings in the shower ? both but cici only allows lil yachty or the phantom of the opera soundtrack.
who washes the other’s hair in the shower ? neither after chandler got shampoo in cici’s eye and she bleached his hair while he slept as revenge.
who initiates shower sex despite being in a rush ? cici declared the shower a no hoe zone.
who teases the other under the table at dinner with the family ? cici but sometimes she just kicks him instead.
who has the weirder taste in music ? they both have horrible playlists.
who would initiate dancing in the rain ? they’d both throw a tantrum if they got caught in the rain for more than two seconds.
who would be the one to suggest marriage ? neither thank god. abel ruins it by making a joke.
what would they name their children ? clementine, ferdinand and the second coming of cecile.
who would their children take after more ? chandler’s eyebrows, cici’s bullshit.

  • Yoongi: I'm gonna go try and find a racquet.
  • Namjoon: Hey, I thought you already had one.
  • Yoongi: Oh I used too, but then Taehyung thought it would be fun to go to Central Park and hit rocks at ... bigger rocks.
  • Seokjin : *comes*
  • Chandler: Hey Jin, do you have a tennis racquet?
  • Seokjin: Oh umm, y'know I lent it to Taehyung and I never actually got it back.
  • Yoongi: Okay, good luck with that.
The Signs as Heathers Quotes
  • Aries: "Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Teresa?"
  • Taurus: "Hi, I'm sorry. Technically, I did not kill Heather Chandler, but hey who am I trying to kid, right? I just want my high school to be a nicer place. Amen. Did that sound bitchy?"
  • Gemini: "Are we going to prom or to hell?"
  • Cancer: "Dear Diary, my teen-angst bullshit now has a body count."
  • Leo: "Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling."
  • Virgo: "How very."
  • Libra: "She's my best friend. God, I hate her."
  • Scorpio: "Veronica, you look like hell." "Yeah? I just got back."
  • Sagittarius: "I don't patronize bunny rabbits."
  • Capricorn: "Veronica, why are you pulling my dick?"
  • Aquarius: "Our love is God, let's go get a Slushie."
  • Pisces: "I like it. It's got that what-a-cruel-world-let's-toss-ourselves-in-the-abyss type ambience."