hes so hot!!! i hate him

sweetiesketches  asked:

YOU DRAW RICK SO GOOD AND I LOWKEY HATE IT BC HE LOOKS ATTRACTIVE AND THAT MAKES ME WEIRDED OUT BC WHEN YOU DRAW HIM HE'S HELLA HOT BUT HE'S LIKE 60 SO I GET TO SIT WITH MY THOUGHTS ON HOW I FOUND A 60 YEAR OLD CARTOON MAN ATTRACTIVE. But... Can you draw more Rick and Morty bc I love your style OvO❤

Oh dude, believe, I gave up the first time I drew him. And I wasn’t even into his looks. ((Btw, thanks boo!!)

Imagine
  • Mason: My god, Brett is so hot. He's like a greek god.
  • Liam: *trying to convince him otherwise* I thought you hated guys that were over a foot taller than you.
  • Mason: An eight pack cancels out being freakishly tall.
  • Liam: *growing annoyed* But he's a freaking tree!
  • Mason: A tree I'd climb any day.
  • Liam: *under his breath* Honestly same.

anonymous asked:

Yuta is so hot omg, I know basically nothing about nct 127 and the members but I saw them at kcon and yuta took my breath away 😍

I hate him. I hate him so much. I was all here for Taeyong and then this rude motherfucker shows up like…

Originally posted by nctinfo

and now I’m confused and fragile and I need to be protected from him but he’s all over my dash and I’m too weak to fight it. Ugh. 

Originally posted by nflyinqs

Rude. So rude. I love him so much :’)

I don’t care what people say, he’s beautiful to me. Go suck an egg. | Redbubble

Asexual People of Note

I was thinking about how I could name maybe one asexual celebrity off the top of my head and decided to do a little research.

First, people who are openly asexual in their own words:

Tim Gunn - Designer and fashion icon most well known for hosting Project Runway, openly self identifies as asexual.The most clear cut and recognizable example on this list as he has actually used the term asexual and encourages support for and education on asexuality and other marginalized sexualities.

Morrissey - This one surprised me! Rock star and leader of the Smiths, his sexuality was a topic of media debate before the term asexual was really available and so he most often claimed to be celibate. Through the 80′s he tried a variety of language including saying he was bisexual, but always clarified that he hated sex and hadn’t participated in sex in years. His most recent statement about it as of 2013:  “Unfortunately, I am not homosexual. In technical fact, I am humasexual. I am attracted to humans. But, of course … not many.” Which in todays language would make him ace or demisexual and biromantic. This ones a little shaky but I wanted to include it anyway.

Janeane Garofalo - A well known female comedian and actress (Wet Hot American Summer, Mystery Men, Dogma, Ratatoullie) who openly talks about her ace sexuality during her stand up routine. She’s quoted as saying in the documentary (A)Sexual - “I don’t have a fear of intimacy, I have sort of a genuine lack of interest”, adding jokingly, “which is not good for my boyfriend of ten years”

Edward Gorey - Iconic artist of The Doubtful Guest, The Gashleycrumb Tinies and dozens of other works of peculiar victorian style horror/surrealism in what he called ‘literary nonsense.’ In an older interview when asked about his sexuality he said:  “I’m neither one thing nor the other particularly. I am fortunate in that I am apparently reasonably undersexed or something … I’ve never said that I was gay and I’ve never said that I wasn’t … what I’m trying to say is that I am a person before I am anything else”
But in an interview collected in the 2002 book Ascending Peculiarity: Edward Gorey on Edward Gorey he agrees that the “sexlessness” of his work was a product of his asexuality.

Emilie Autumn - Artist and musician best known for her part in cult classic The Devil’s Carnival Emilie has self identified as asexual several times in interviews and unusually seems to be a sex-positive asexual who’s been with men and women.


Historical Figures who were ‘celibate’ and may have been asexual:


J.M. Barrie - Author of Peter Pan and other children’s stories, the famous author was known to be disinterested in sex. He married once, but the marriage remained unconsummated and eventually ended in divorce. Though no such rumors were ever apparent when he was alive, in more recent years there’s been concern that he was a paedophile because of his close friendship with the five sons of the Llewelyn Davies family, for whom Peter Pan and some of his other stories were written. There’s never been any evidence of this, and he stayed close friends with the boys into their adulthood. The best evidence of his asexuality is a quote from one of the Llewelyn Davies boys who, when asked if Barrie had ever behaved inappropriately with him, said: “I don’t believe that Uncle Jim ever experienced what one might call ‘a stirring in the undergrowth’ for anyone—man, woman, or child”, he stated. “He was an innocent—which is why he could write Peter Pan.”

T.E. Lawrence - The author and archaeologist upon which Lawrence of Arabia was based and one of the strongest cases for asexuality in a historical figure. He stated his total lack of or desire for sexual experience multiple times in personal letters and personal friends have also stated in interviews that Lawrence had no interest in men or women. He may possibly have been homoromantic, speaking tolerantly of such relationships in his writings.

Nikola Tesla - Famed inventor, engineer and scientist, Nikola was a life long bachelor and was said to have never pursued a single romantic relationship. He said his chastity was helpful to his studies and once claimed he could never be worthy enough for a woman, whom he considered to be superior to men in every way.

Kenji Miyazawa -  A celebrated poet and children’s author in Japan during the 1900′s, Miyazawa was never married or appeared to have any interest in romantic or sexual relationships. A close friend wrote that he died a virgin. Unfortunately, as he did not gain popularity until after his death, that speculation is all the evidence there is.


It was pretty tiring even trying to find this much, but if anyone has people to add to this list, please do! We need more asexual role models, and more evidence that we exist, and have always existed.

Reasons I love Ryuji Sakamoto

-described as “vulgar boy” but doesn’t say fuck
-doesn’t even question Akira following him to school through a creepy alleyway
-hates Kamoshida, but not for himself, even though the asshole broke his leg
-did I mention his legs?
-Ryuji has the best gams in the game. No question
-somehow gets away with not following uniform guidelines at school whatsoever
-tiny eyebrows
-is literally always at Akira’s side, encouraging him and being the first one to speak up
-literally the bestest bro
-sure he talks about getting chicks, but he steps in when dudes harass Ann
-him and Ann seem like legitimate friends without a shoehorned romance or flirting
-He just wants the best for everyone
-isn’t afraid to express his emotions, even the feelings of helplessness, remorse, being lost, feeling alone, etc.
-refreshingly optimistic
-not afraid to get up close and personal with his friends
-like, he has no problems with physical contact with Akira, which is something you don’t see alot (aka: 2 dudes sitting in the hot tub 5 ft apart cause they’re not gay)
-doesn’t take it to heart or get offended when his friends tease him
-has the best t-shirts
-just so sweet. So good.
-hates injustice against people who don’t deserve it
-texts Akira like 6 times in a row instead of one chunk, so relatable
-blonde
-is an abuse survivor and I must reiterate HAD HIS LEG BROKEN BY A TEACHER
-canonically walks with a limp, but doesn’t let it get to him
-so happy so good so beautiful
-is best boy
-i love him

anonymous asked:

Hey so you prob have v v many prompts but like I would love to suggest one.. Okay so, Dan is a very confident slutty pastel teenager and Phil is a badass punk boy that everyone fawns over.. and they absolutely hate each other but one thing leads to another and they end up at the same party where Phil is dared to fuck Dan in front of everyone.. (LOTS OF DEGRATION, and dom Phil and sub dan)

a 👌 classic 👌👌

*small mention of rape*

dirty talk + degrading + lots of language idk it’s one am

-

“You look like a slut.” PJ handed Dan a drink, leaning against the counter next to him, raising his eyebrows.

“Thanks, that was the point.” Dan winked, hiking up his already far too short baby blue shorts. PJ rolled his eyes.

“You’re gonna get raped.”

“Um, excuse me, I can take care of myself.” Dan took a sip from the red plastic cup, frowning. “I haven’t gotten raped yet, have I?”

PJ shook his head, staring at Dan like he didn’t understand him one bit. “I just don’t get why you want to look like you strip for truckers.”

Dan pursed his lips, shifting his pink sweater so it hung on him perfectly, showing just the right amount of collarbone. He smirked.

“That’s probably because you’re a virgin, honey.”

PJ pretended to flinch, shaking his head. “Ouch. That was harsh.”

Dan just shrugged, licking his lips.

“Hey Dan,” PJ started, his eyes lighting up as he stared at something across the room. “Your boyfriend’s here.”

“Shit,” Dan groaned, not even having to look, but he did anyways.

Phil Lester had just entered the room, fully clad in black and far too many zippers.

He was wearing a black leather jacket and t shirt, his jeans the same shade, what a surprise. On his feet were large motorcycle boots. Dan scowled.

He had about five people practically hanging off his arms, Dan hated him.

“He thinks he’s so hot,” Dan grumbled, glaring at his cup. “He thinks he can get anyone he fucking wants, what a twat.”

“Aw,” PJ grinned. “Dan’s got a crush.”

“Fuck you,” Dan growled, punching him on the arm, hard. “I’m as close to having a crush on him as I am to fucking him.”

“Dan, you’re literally the sluttiest person I have ever met.”

Dan rolled his eyes. “I’ll fuck almost anyone BUT him.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Positive.”

~~~

Dan raised his eyebrows, amused. “No. You’re drunk.”

“C'mon Dan,” his friend Chris whined, tugging at his sleeve. “It’ll be fun!”

“No, it won’t.” Dan pulled his hand away. “It’ll be a lot of drunk guys daring me to jerk them. I’m not playing.”

Chris sighed, crossing his arms. “Dan, I hate to do this, but if you don’t come I’ll tell everyone that you hooked up with Mr. Parker over the summer.”

Dan’s eyes widened, and he glared at him. “You wouldn’t.”

“I would.” Chris smirked. Dan scowled at his friend.

“Fine. Fuck you, fine. Let’s get this over with.”

The game of truth or dare was happening in one of the bedrooms; Dan was fairly certain it belonged to the kid’s parents. It consisted of a bunch of drunk sweaty teens that had formed a circle, passing around risky orders and questions in excited whispers.

Dan sat down between Chris and PJ, running his fingers through his hair. He shot a glare at Phil across the circle, who was staring at him.

The first ten minutes were normal. The other kids basically ignored Dan, focusing on one person after another. They seemed to change their focus often; singling out one poor soul after another. Soon the focus was on Phil.

“If you had to fuck anyone in this group, who would it be?” Some guy asked Phil, and Dan looked up, for some reason interested to hear the answer.

Phil smirked, glancing around at everyone before his eyes landed on Dan. He laughed.

“Probably not him,” he said, grinning cockily. “I wouldn’t want to catch anything.”

Dan felt a pang shoot through his chest, and he crossed his arms.

“Fuck you, Lester. At least I don’t have to wear animal skin to look bad ass,” he shot back. Phil glared at him.

The rest of the group fell fairly silent, and Dan was highly aware of everyone’s eyes on them. Finally Chris spoke.

“Okay but, you guys should fuck.”

There was some mutual agreement, and Dan’s eyes widened.

“What? Why!”

“Yeah, no, for once I agree with you. Hell no.” Phil shook his head, looking shocked.

“With a few more drinks, you two will be all over each other.” A boy, Dan thought he remembered his name was Charlie and that he was the kid this house belonged to, said, taking a swig of his beer. There was some nodding from the other people.

“That’s not true,” Dan mumbled, crossing his arms.

“Alright, is no one going to say it?” Chris glanced around the circle. “Fine, I will. I dare you two to kiss.”

“Fuck no,” Dan said immediately, before Phil could even respond. “I’m not doing that.”

“Dan, don’t be a pussy,” Phil growled in a voice Dan was fairly certain he had never heard from him before. “It’s a dare.”

“You’re seriously agreeing to this?” Dan scoffed. Phil shrugged.

“Well, I’m not scared of a little dare.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Dan mumbled, sighing and moving closer to him, on his knees. “Fine. Let’s get this over with.”

Phil smirked, leaning forward and pulling Dan forward by his shirt so he was practically sitting in his lap. Dan hardly had time to react, let alone speak, before Phil was pressing their lips together. Dan just let it happen; it only lasted a second before Phil was pulling back and it was over.

“No no no,” Chris said, grinning. “That doesn’t count. You have to really kiss, for at least ten seconds.”

“Seriously?” Dan asked, and his friend just shrugged. Phil mumbled something under his breath, tangling his fingers in Dan’s hair and tugging him back roughly.

This time Phil kissed him open mouthed, their lips clashing and sliding together. Dan was highly aware of Phil’s tongue invading his mouth, and he fought back with his own.

Dan wrapped his arms around Phil’s neck, kissing him deeper and clutching at his shirt, so lost in the feeling that he didn’t hear Chris shouting that their time was up.

Finally Dan pulled back, mostly because he needed to breathe, and frowned when he realized everyone was staring at him. Including Phil.

Everyone was quiet, mostly in shock, until a boy in the back spoke up.

“I dare you to ride him,” he said, grinning drunkly.

Dan and Phil made eye contact, and Phil smirked.

“Well?” He asked cockily.

“You’re really putting this up to me?”

Phil nodded slowly, licking his lips and tangling his fingers in Dan’s hair, tugging his head back roughly. “Well, Dan? Are you too scared?”

“I’m not scared,” Dan breathed, frowning at him.

“Well then prove it, pretty boy.”

Dan gasped as Phil bit down on his neck, sucking thoroughly on a spot under his ear. It felt completely wrong to have the guy he absolutely despised leaving marks on his neck, but kind of fucking sexy in a way. Or maybe that was the alcohol talking.

Dan felt himself tense up as Phil slid his hand down his stomach, brushing the hem of his shorts.

“Couldn’t we use a different room or something?” Dan asked, grabbing Phil’s wrists instinctively.

“No,” said the boy from before, quickly. “We won’t have any proof you did it.”

“You thirsty fucker,” Dan hissed at him as Phil played with his zipper.

Phil hummed against his neck as he pushed down his shorts, and Dan let him. None of them would remember this in the morning, and most of them had seen Dan naked anyways.

“I bet you love this,” he whispered, biting down on Dan’s ear, scratching his nails down Dan’s thighs. “You’re such a fucking slut, I bet you love being exposed like this.”

“Says the guy who’s erection is digging into my back,” Dan shot back, and Phil shrugged.

“So? I’m turned on. At least I admit it.”

Dan jumped slightly as Phil brushed over his bulge, and Phil chuckled.

“I hate you,” Dan breathed as Phil palmed him, drawing a whine from Dan’s mouth.

“Mmh, doesn’t sound that way.”

Dan felt Phil messing with his own jeans, pushing them down his hips.

“Do you know how many people would love to be in your place right now, you ungrateful slut?”

Dan smirked. “Yeah, just about every thirteen year old girl in our school.”

Phil pulled Dan’s hair roughly, exposing his throat, and Dan couldn’t help letting a whimper escape him.

“You don’t get to speak to me that way,” he growled, and Dan could feel his hard on grinding against his ass. “Understand?”

Dan couldn’t help but moan, grinding back on Phil’s lap. “Yes sir,” he gasped.

Phil put his fingers to Dan’s mouth, and Dan took them obediently. He carefully covered them with spit before Phil pulled them out.

“I figure you don’t need stretching,” Phil muttered, smirking meanly. Dan just nodded, unable to think of a snarky comeback in that exact moment.

Dan felt Phil lining up, and then gripping his waist.

“Push back,” he breathed, pulling Dan back on his lap slightly. Dan moaned, pushing back on Phil’s cock completely.

He grinded back slowly, his eyes closed and whorish moans falling from his mouth nonstop.

“That’s it, baby, moan like a dirty fucking slut for me,” Phil groaned, biting down on Dan’s neck. “Such a good fucktoy, that’s it.”

Dan whined, letting out little gasps and “ah ah ah”’s as he bounced and grinded expertly, fucking himself on Phil’s dick. They seemed to have both forgotten anyone else was in the room, except for a faint prickle on Dan’s neck, the feeling of being watched, which was honestly turning him on even more.

Phil grabbed Dan’s wrists, pinning them behind his back and thrusting up into him roughly.

“Think you can cum without me touching you?” He asked huskily. “Because, that would be really fucking hot.”

Dan nodded almost immediately, speeding up his movements with a loud whimper.

“Fuck, daddy,” he gasped, and Phil practically growled.

“What a pretty toy, acting like such a slut for me, in front of all these people,” he whispered, meeting Dan’s hips with his own. “Everyone’s watching you, Dan, watching you call me daddy and fuck yourself on my cock. I bet you fucking love it, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Dan whimpered. “Yes, daddy, god yes, l-love it.”

“Good boy.” Phil pulled Dan’s head back on his shoulder. “Now cum for me, princess.”

Dan let go with a loud continuous feminine moan, his hips twitching as he thrust forward automatically. Phil groaned, burying his face in Dan’s neck as he let go inside of him.

Dan slumped onto the carpet, completely fucked out, his eyes still closed.

“Jesus,” he breathed.

Phil was suddenly very aware of all of the people staring at them, and laughed.

“Hey, Charlie, I can use your shower right?”

The boy nodded slowly, still shocked into silence.

“Cool.” Phil grinned, scooping Dan up bridal style in one motion and standing carefully. “Uh, if you hear noises from the bathroom, you probably have rats and it’s totally not a second round.”

dating peter parker would include...

dedicated to my harrison bestie anon in hopes it makes them smile :) also yes it’s really fuckin long i’m sorry i just love peter parker and have a lot of feelings

  • you actually hate to tell the story of how you two met because it’s mortifiying oh mygod
  • peter, however, loves to watch u blush about it even though it was only really embarrassing when it happened
  • taking the subway to school like every other day, you obviously had spent too many hours on the internet so u were tired as hell 
  • so tired you couldn’t grab the pole in time when the subway stopped
  • and you in an ungraceful manner, tripped, stumbled and fell
  • into his lap
  • his l a p 
  • you still get red cheeks when remember just how embarrassing it was
  • oh my god! i c-can’t believe that- i-i, i’m so so sorry- h-holy shit–
  • peter did find it extremely awkward but your mortified and blushing red face was so much more adorable 
  • n-no, it’s fine– d-do you want my seat?
  • o-oh no, it’s alright. i’d just like to crawl into a hole somewhere. sudden amnesia works too.
  • AND BOY
  • a cute girl with wit and oh my is that a nerdy shirt????
  • from them on, you had his entire heart 
  • yes i will totally be writing a full on imagine for this
  • you guys weren’t friends for long if u know what i mean 
  • like you had already face planted into his lap so you skipped most of the awkward interactions
  • you were kinda like ‘ah what the hell’ 
  • you did it while you guys were walking home together, like usual
  • hey peter, can you hold this for me?
  • yeah?” 
  • and you just grabbed his hand, grinning at him with wink 
  • cue the cutest blushing from peter 
  • peter goddamn nearly had a heart attack but couldn’t stop smiling the entire walk home 
  • he was really sad when he reached your building 
  • but then you stood on ur tippy toes and kissed him on the cheek so he wasn’t that sad
  • eventually kisses on the cheeks became kisses on the lips & it wasn’t official but you two just knew
  • let’s be real, peter is the worlds biggest dork so movie marathons are so common
  • i mean everything– star wars, back to the future, jurassic park, like man you name it 
  • and if u were a nerd too, then oH boy he would just be in a constant state of heart eyes 
  • he would be anyways but extra heart eyes if u geek out
  • c’mon pete, hurry that cute lil ass up! it’s rogue one!!
  • oh my god, please marry me right now.
  • you guys definitely try to quote movies as much as possible
  • i love you” ”i know *intense blushing* diD YOU JUST–
  • he has a such soft spot for when you guys marathon disney movies not that he tells you that
  • something about you lighting up & singing along makes him go !!!!!!! inside
  • no you two never perform disney duet songs together never ever have you done that why do u ask
  • (your favourite one to perform is hakuna matata because its a goddamn classic and peter gets so into it)
  • (breaking free from hsm is a close second because damn can peter hit those notes when he really tries)
  • peter parker is such an admirer like you dont even know
  • he could stare at you for hours and its pretty much what gets him through the day tbh
  • in fact, he has all your birthmarks and freckles committed to memory because shes so pretty i can’t deal with this
  • he blushes SO MUCH when you catch him staring
  • but lets be real, you were staring at him too
  • he blushed even more when he found that out because oh my fucking god she was staring at me do i look weird is there something on my face
  • but when you’re like no you goof, i’m admiring youu get 
  • BLUSHING STUTTERING STAMMERING PETER PARKER
  • he just never stops blushing 
  • he! would! try! so! hard! at everything 4 you
  • baking? hell yeah he’ll bake for u
  • singing? eh he’ll give it a go (but only for you)  
  • dancing? he hates it but he loves to watch u laugh and smile with him so he does it anyways (even if he sucks)
  • speaking of dancing
  • peter loves it when u dance
  • especially when you stay over and he wakes up to you dancing around the kitchen or his room 
  • his favourite is catching you off guard when you’re grooving to some 80′s song
  • babe– cutting himself off with his own laughter, i don’t think that’s dancing.
  • he loves to tease you about your funky dancing because seeing his girl blushing is like his second favourite thing
  • (the first being your smile because it completely melts his insides and everything is better when you smile at him)
  • you also love it when he’s teasing because all you have is pout and suddenly peter’s showering you in kisses 
  • peter is such a sucker for kisses
  • actually he’s such a hopeless romantic & lover of cliches like
  • constantly bringing you flowers he finds on nightly patrols? check 
  • stopping so you two can share a cutesy kiss in the rain? check 
  • dumb pick up lines that still make you laugh? check 
  • tbh you both do pickup lines
  • hey, hey y/n, are you the square root of -1? because you can’t be real 
  • are you kIDDING– NO I’M NOT BLUSHING AT YOUR DUMB PICK UP LINE GO AWAY PARKER
  • he just giggles at you from the bed
  • except when you do it, its a different story
  • hey hey hey, peter 
  • hmm?” 
  • are you related to yoda? because yodalicious.
  • peter just falls off the bed 
  • you don’t even ask if he’s alright, you just cut straight to laughing at his reaction
  • s-shut up! this isn’t because of your pick up line!! i was startled! 
  • even though he’s trying to hide his face in a pillow, you can see his pink cheeks
  • sure, peter, sure. 
  • aunt may is both a blessing and a curse to both of you 
  • because she spills BOTH OF YOUR SECRETS
  • like you can’t ramble to her about peter because she will tell him everything
  • with you in the same room 
  • oh peter, you’re wearing that shirt? i know y/n loves it, she was talking just the other day about how she find it so hot– 
  • “MAY HE DOESN’T NEED TO KNOW”
  • peter secretly really wants to know what you said about him 
  • but aunt may does it to peter too and he hates it
  • “seriously y/n, you should hear the things he says about you, i swear he’s turned into some lovesick–”
  • “nO MAY SHH YOU CAN STOP NOW”
  • makeout sessions ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • you both l o v e them 
  • funnily enough, peter is the one who usually starts them 
  • hey y/n, you’ve got something on your face, let me just– *kisses you all over you face*
  • because he’s more than ahead in his classes, ‘study dates’ really means makeout not that you mind though  
  • peter loves kisses everywhere
  • forehead kisses
  • nose kisses
  • shoulder kisses
  • eyelid kisses
  • back of the hand kisses
  • all the kisses
  • his absolute favourite kiss is the one he receives from you in the morning when you’ve stayed over
  • he’ll play with your hair softly and you’ll yawn & stretch and catch him gazing at you 
  • and you just smile and lean up and kiss him 
  • it never fails to make peters heart stop and when you pull away he just goes nooooooooooooo and pouts till you kiss him again 
  • it’s especially hard when you have to leave or part ways after school because peter turns into a needy lil boy
  • one more kiss! one more! 
  • peter you’ve said that seven times now!! 
  • you literally have to push his away, giggling and grinning, because otherwise he’s going to be late 
  • i swear to god parker, it’s only one class! 
  • and of course you know about him being spidey
  • you actually found out by accident 
  • you were searching thru his closest for something to wear when you stumbled across it 
  • tbh you thought it was a really dedicated costume at first
  • so you put it on and it was so fucking baggy man
  • hey peter! look at me, i’m the spider man! thwip thwip! 
  • except it was the real thing so 
  • y-y/n!! where did you find that??? 
  • don’t worry, i’ll keep your spider-man obsession a secret, peter.
  • but when you accidentally web peter’s hand to the wall, you figure out this suit is the real deal 
  • holy shit!! holy shit! you– you’re, this is the real, oh my god, you’re the spider-man!  
  • peter just panics because you’ve webbed him to the wall and he can’t actually do anything
  • no! no i’m not!
  • you freak out for like another minute before you gather your senses enough 
  • peter parker, do not play with me right now- are you spider-man?
  • would you believe me if i said it was a very detailed halloween costume?
  • after cutting him free, you squeezed him into the tightest hug because you were so goddamn proud of him 
  • but also because oh my god how many times had he risked his life and had you not known???? 
  • oh my god, this is so wicked i can’t believe you’re spider-man–
  • you can’t tell anyone! 
  • shh, you know i wouldn’t but holy god! you have to tell me everything
  • you’re not mad i didn’t tell you?” 
  • pfft, i’ll only be mad if you don’t tell me now.
  • yes i also want to make this an imagine
  • yes, you’re the one who patches him up which always ends in cuddles
  • basically you get to shower peter in constant love and affection because he would do that and more for you 
  • he’s just the perfect boyfriend??? 
  • i want a peter parker
  • Lance: *makes eye contact with Keith*
  • Lance's mind: goddamnit Keith is so fucking hot I always tell him I hate his mullet but it's actually kinda cute what did I do to deserve this why have I been blessed to know this amazing person named Keith Kogane he is the greatest friend I could ever meet why the fuck am I like this I wanna hug him and kiss him and love him goddamnit-
  • Lance: Fuck off, mullet
So I got bored and checked the weather for both Almaty and St. Petersburg and they're hilariously different so here's an otayuri drabble

Why the hell Yakov was making him practice in this heat, Yuri had no idea. But he hated him for it.

Sure, it wasn’t drastically hot, but 19°C was hot for St. Petersburg, and Yuri could be enjoying the weather if A: it wasn’t so humid, and B: Yakov wasn’t making him practice.

Yuri tipped his head back, the vertebrae in his neck creaking and tense muscles stretching.

“Hey Yakov-”

“Give me a perfect triple axel into a spread eagle and you’re free to go.” The old man told him, drinking from the water bottle handed to him by Lilia.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” Yuri said, exasperated. “In this heat?”

“Vitya’s been making Katsuki practice his quads all day, at least I’m not that cruel.” Yakov shrugged.

“Actually, I’m doing this voluntarily.” Yuuri called, taking off and landing a frustratingly perfect quad flip.

“I’ve been trying to make him come home for hours Yakov, this is none of my doing.” Viktor groaned, leaning against the barrier and wiping his brow.

“You said it yourself Vitya,” Yuuri shrugged, pulling off an effortless triple axel into a spread eagle. “I’m going to need to try my best to beat you.”

“I’ve created a monster. I’m doomed.” Viktor sighed defeatedly, gazing at Yuuri.

“And Yurio-” He started, trailing lazily around the rink.

“Don’t call me that.”

“I’m not stopping until I have both records, so I suggest you watch yourself.”

“Getting cocky, now are we, Katsudon?” Yuri asked, cocking a brow.

“Well it’s not the only thing I’m getting.” Yuuri shrugged, taking off into a perfect quad salchow, winking at Viktor as he landed.

“What the fuck have you done to him, Vitkor?” Yuri asked, slightly disgusted at the innuendo.

“I don’t know!” Viktor said exasperatedly.

“Alright, that’s it.” Yakov sighed. “Katsuki, get your ass out of my rink before you kill yourself.”

“I’m not even tired though.” Yuuri sighed, taking off into a quad loop.

“You’re hell bent on destroying my skaters and I can’t have that. Get out before you hurt yourself.” Yakov said firmly.

“But-”

“Yuuri.” Mila started. “We adore you, you’re sweet and talented and everything but with every jump you land, Yakov pushes us that much harder, so please, for the love of god, get the fuck out of the rink.”

“Okay, okay.” Yuuri sighed, finally skating off of the rink, Mila earning an exhausted ‘thank you’ from Viktor, who followed behind Yuuri.

“Yura. Triple axel. Now.” Yakov said firmly, folding his arms.

“Seriously?!”

“Yes. Now.”

“I’d like to see you do it, old man.” Yuri huffed, crossing his arms.

“Just do it, Yuri.” Yuuri called. “Anyway, we’re leaving for today, guys.”

“Finally!” Georgi groaned.

“Please take like, the next week off, you’re making us look bad.” Mila joked.

“No actually do, you’re driving me insane.” Yuri called.

“And Yakov said I couldn’t coach anyone.” Viktor smirked, pecking Yuuri on the cheek.

“Just leave already.” Yakov sighed. “Yuri, triple axel. I’m waiting.”

“For fucks sake, do I have to?”

“Do you want to lose the Olympics?”

“… fine.”

“That’s what I thought.”


Yuri unlocked his dorm, dumping his duffle bag at the door and kicking his shoes off. It’d been a week since Yakov and Lilia’s asshole of a son kicked Yuri out of his mother’s house.

He stalked over the mini fridge in the corner of his room, opening it and pulling out a cold can of fanta, wrenching open the tab and flopping down on his bed.

He pulled his phone out of his back pocket, unlocking it and opening up whatsapp, ignoring the 689 missed texts from the Barcelona GPF group chat and scrolling to Otabek’s contact, selecting video call.

Otabek picked up after around the 3rd ring, and the imagine Yuri was greeted with wasn’t what he expected.

A flushed, tanned, sweaty, muscular chest and a giggling little girl in the background. The camera shakily carried up to Otabek’s face, where it was obvious that he older boy was fast asleep.

“Bekaaaa!” Giggled the little girl, a bony little hand with garish pink nail polish and ratty bracelets pressing down on Otabek’s chest. “Oyanw! Beka! Käne Beka!”

Otabek made a weird noise between a snort and a squawk, eyes snapping open suddenly as he lurched forwards.

“Sälem aytşı Yura!” The little girl giggled.

“Natya…” Otabek murmured groggily. “Nege telefonım bar?” He asked, reaching for the phone and pulling the little girl to the side. “Bul öte jaramsız.” He scolded, blowing a raspberry into the little girl’s cheek.

“Um… is this a bad time?” Yuri asked awkwardly, taking a sip from his soda can. “I can go…”

“Crap! Yura, I forgot. Sorry, I fell asleep and my little sister took my phone-”

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.” Yuri shrugged. “It’s kinda cute.”

Otabek laughed, ruffling his sister’s messy black hair.

“Sälem Yura!” She grinned, waving at the screen.

“She says hi.” Otabek grinned, translating.

“Hi Natalia.” Yuri smiled, waving back, earning a gap-toothed grin from the little girl.

“Natya, Siz bizden kete alasız ba?” Otabek asked his sister, slipping back into his native tongue.

She nodded, waving at the screen.

“Bayt Yura!” She giggled, running off.

“She’s adorable.” Yuri smiled, sipping from the can again.

“I know.” Otabek grinned.

“Did you teach her to call me that?”

“Call you what?”

“To call me Yura?”

“She’s called you that since she saw you on TV at the Russian Nationals two years ago.”

“Why though?”

“Don’t look at me, she just does.”

Oh, Yuri was look at him.

“Why aren’t you wearing a shirt?”

“Huh?”

“You’re half naked. At least I think you are… I can only see your chest.”

“I’m wearing underwear if that’s what you’re asking.” Otabek snorted, flashing Yuri a crooked grin.

“Really? No pants?”

“It’s too hot.” Otabek shrugged, reaching for a something offscreen and bringing a glass of water to his lips.

“Seriously? Isn’t it like, 19°C? Kinda pathetic. And that’s coming from a Moscow native.”

“It’s 36°C over here.” Otabek said flatly.

“Damn, your coach makes you practice in that heat?” Yuri asked incredulously.

“Nah. Training’s cancelled. He’s passed out in the porch.”

“Lucky bastard. Yakov’s been forcing me to train.” Yuri huffed.

“Watch your language, Yura. My family is in the vicinity.”

“I’m like 300 miles away they can’t hurt me.”

“My cousin will find you. You know what Aleks is like.”

“And I hope you boys are keeping it PG-13!” Came the call of cousin in the background, causing Otabek to flush slightly.

“ALEKS!”

“I’m just saying! Your mother wouldn’t be too happy if she saw you-”

“Aleks, sabırlılıqtı toqtatıñız Beka!” Came a call.

“Dude I can hear like, your entire family, where are you?”

“In my back yard.” He shrugged, switching the camera so Yuri could get a view of the lush, green garden, and the hammock Otabek was laying in.

“Its huge!” Yuri gasped. “Your family must be loaded!”

“My mother was an Olympic silver medalist. That kind of set us up for quite a while, then I started to send money home whenever I got it.” Otabek shrugged. “Joq, Natya, şlangini tömenge ornatıñız!”

Yuri heard giggling in the background, along with running water. Otabek shifted, the camera shaking a bit as he moved.

“My sister has a hose, I’m going inside.” He explained as a jet of water splashed behind him. “Nope nope nope nope. Not today.”

“Are you afraid of getting wet, Beka?”

“No I just don’t want to get- AH!”

“Are you okay?” Yuri asked, cocking an eyebrow at the maniacal cackling heard in the background.

“Yeah, my sister just got me in the ass while I was running inside.”

“Damn, good aim.”

“Yeah,” He said, camera shaking as he went up the stairs, opening the door to his room and pushing in. “Yura?”

“Still here.”

“I’m gonna need to change but I’m too lazy to disconnect the call, can I just put you against a pillow so you don’t see anything?”

“Sure.” Yuri shrugged, tossing his empty soda can into the trash.

The screen went a dark reddish-brown colour as it was pressed against the pillow, the camera suddenly flipping just as the screen went black.

Yuri could see Otabek pull away, turning around and pulling down the damp, dark grey boxers.

What the hell was Yuri supposed to do?!

The rational thing to would be to tell Otabek 'hey the camera accidentally flipped and I can see your ass and probably dick but I’m not sure’, but for some reason Yuri couldn’t speak.

Otabek turned in the direction of the camera, humming to himself as he stopped up the boxers and tossed them into the laundry hamper at the edge of his room, walking over to a chest of drawers and pulling out a pair of boxers.

Otabek quickly pulled the boxers on, rooting through the drawers and pulling out some shorts and a t-shirt, putting those on too.

He reached for the camera, which suddenly flipped back to front facing as it was being pulled away from the pillow.

“Sorry I took so long- Yura, are you okay?” Otabek asked, suddenly concerned.

“Y-yeah I’m fine. Why are you asking me?” Yuri stammered awkwardly.

“Your face, it’s all… red. Are you sure you’re fine?”

“Yeah yeah I’m fine! I’m just a bit hot and sweaty from practice, I should probably shower.” Yuri said quickly.

“Okay…” Otabek murmured, unconvinced. “If you don’t feel better after the shower, call Viktor or Yuuri or someone like that. And make sure you drink a lot of water. And eat properly. None of that energy bar nonsense-”

“Okay mom, jeez. I’m fine, really.” Yuri said, rolling his eyes.

“Don’t get smart with me, young man.” Otabek said jokingly.

Yuri rolled his eyes, snorting.

“Bye Beka.”

“I’ll see you later, okay? I’ll call you later.”

“I really can’t stop you can I?”

“Nope.”

Yuri laughed, ending the call and flinging his phone onto the other end of the bed and pressing his hands into his face.

Otabek is hung like a fucking horse.

——-

I just winged it ok sorry

Writing is Hard, Part 5: Headcanons

Summary: Dean shows the reader that there’s truth to a famous headcanon.

Read Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Warning: Smut

Word Count: 3000ish

A/N: This is all written with love for fan fic. I’m teasing, not putting it down in any way. Hope you enjoy! (Sorry, tag list is closed!) XOXO


“Reading anything good?” Dean asks.

Sam’s inside the gas station, picking up some snacks instead of listening to this conversation, so your face doesn’t feel the need to flush with embarrassment. Dean already knows exactly what you’re reading.

“I guess,” you tell him. No need to feed his ego by telling him how hot the story is.

“What is it?”

Keep reading

4

Sebastian Stan playing table football in The Covenant

Blowjob

Deadpool x Reader

Warnings: It’s fucking Deadpool. 

Summary: Your girl Nega hooks you up with Wade Wilson. 

Originally posted by my-daily-space

The bar was dingy as fuck.

Fuck it was downright biowaste, but it was the place your date picked. And now you were questioning the whole damn thing.

Cursing Nega under your breath for setting you up with her ‘friend’, you hustled into the bar and looked down at your phone. Quickly you texted the number of Wade Wilson, the man you had been talking to on and off for the last week and a half.

“I’m here.”

A second later, your cell buzzed. “Holy shit you’re way hotter in person. Fuck me.”

Another buzz. “Full disclosure, I have a boner.”

Another buzz. “Also my penis is big.”

Keep reading

hc bc i am obsessed w this ship

-so they’re all at lunch one day right

-and michelle is trying to concentrate on reading ofc what else 

-but the two nerds are too busy giggling about something

-and peter’s face is distracting her again

-so she tells them to cut it out

-and ned asks her why she doesnt wear makeup and

-she’s like “why should i”

-and the two boys look like they’re about to pee themselves and michelle would laugh

-if she didn’t feel extremely insecure rn,,

-like it’s never really mattered to her but it was always there gnawing at the back of her mind and

-she haTES HERSELEF FOR LETTing society’s obnoxious standards control her feelings but

-it’s there and it’s probably showing that she’s insecure

-so she just tells them that it’s a long process and she’s just really lazy (which is somewhat true)

-but these losers see right through her dammit and

-then peter turns to ned and he not so whispers  

-”she still looks really pretty tho. like she always looks pretty but she’s got that glow today-”

-and ned joins in, the little dweeb

-”you’ve called her that word before…what is it again?? ethereal??’

-and michelle is trying sO HARD TO HIDE HER SMILE WITH HER BOOK

-then all of a sudden peter’s voice becomes really high (is that even possible at this point lmao oops)

-and he elbows NED

- “duDE!”

-and then ned is like “what? ethe-hahah! ethereal?? did i say ethereal?? wow what even is that?? such a foreign concept?? i meant…um golden!”

-and bc they are also horrible whisperers and they don’t know that she can still totally hear them

-”you can thank me later for the smooth save. she does look golden.”

-and she can literally hear peter and imagine the panicky look on his face rn

-”neD! NOW IS NOT THE TIME!”

-and the bell rings and her cheeks are as red as they can be

-and she hates but also loves the two of them sm rn

-but peter looks very flustered and panicky and nervous when she looks at him for a moment

-but then he notices her cheeks

-and he smIRKS

-michelle does not know how to function

-her mind is literally ………………

-bc holy wow she has never seen peter smirk like that before and

-it’s kinda hot what

-stop it michelle

-she’s literally a mess rn

-michelle, honey, i can #relate

-so she just stands there and stares at them for a sec before going

-”you guys are…losers”

-and she spRINTS away

-and ned is like dude holy crap

-did u just??

-make michelle jones, our decathlon captain-with no mercy, blush and get flustered all while not embarassing yourself

-peter is kinda shook tbh bc kdjadjfkfkf he made her blush!!!

-ned is honestly liVING FOR THIS NEW SHIP

-and the end

frustrating — peter parker

prompt: you and peter both have immense crushes on each other, but say nothing, because best friends aren’t supposed to think about kissing each other

warnings: language and fluff. plus this is super long rip

notes: prompts like this fuck me UP man like I am a sucker for cliché tropes done correctly and in a way that isn’t sexist or toxic. hope you enjoy requests are open! i’m thinking of making a sequel to this bc it’s super cute and I have so much more I want to happen, but y’all can decide if that happens or not :)


Though he hasn’t known you for that long, Peter can’t help but admire you and the person you were constantly. He finds himself thinking about it when his eyes glaze over the room, searching for you landing on you, and he can’t help the corners of his lips tugging up into the softest, most appreciative smile you’ve never seen.

He doesn’t know how, out of the two years you’ve been best friends, you hadn’t notice his wandering gaze and his staring, but he’s glad you don’t catch it. He’s sure that you’d find nothing of it, mainly because that’s just the person you were, but still. There are times when he’d wish you’d notice his eyes poring over your entire being and you’d actually say something to give him an idea of how you feel about him. He doesn’t actually expect you to of course, because by nature you were quite awkward and would never say something that you thought would embarrass you, nor would you ever actually tell him if you liked him. It’s not like he would either.

And it’s not like he thought you would ever like him in the first place.

Keep reading