hermione*

Percy Jackson; Son of Poseidon

“The world was collapsing, and the only thing that really mattered to me was that she was alive.”

Nine Hundred and Sixty-Two

This was an anon request for a jealous Hermione. You had asked for it to be about an Auror colleague of Ron’s and I tried but I couldn’t make it work. Sorry, anon, I hope you still like it and thanks for sending it in.



If Hermione was certain of anything in this life, it was that Ron Weasley loved her with all his heart.

But that didn’t mean she didn’t worry a little.

After the war, the trio had reached an odd, feverish level of celebrity in the wizarding world that brought with it a crush of attention and many ardent admirers. Harry was used to the scrutiny, Hermione brushed it off but Ron, Ron had been overlooked and underappreciated his whole life and some of those ardent admirers were busty and blonde…

“Ah, come on,” Ron said. “Why would I go for those stewed mushrooms when I already have a bacon sandwich?”

“How flattering,” Hermione sighed.

“Are you thinking about that girl from this afternoon?” he said. “She was getting a little touchy, yes, but I was just being polite. When dealing with difficult women, I have found it works best to be complimentary.” He paused. “Have I mentioned you look lovely tonight?”

She swatted at him half-heartedly.

“Hermione?” he said and there was no more joking in his voice. “Do you really not know?”

When she didn’t reply he took her face in his hands and gave her a firm kiss. And not just any kiss, but one of those ardent, slow, toe-curlingly wonderful kisses that he was so terribly good at.

“Nine hundred and sixty-two,” he said when he finally let her resurface.

“What?” she said dimly, still trying to regain her bearings.

“Nine hundred and sixty-two. I have kissed you nine hundred and sixty-two times.”

She laughed. “You’re counting?”

“Yes,” he said seriously. “I’ve been keeping track since the first one. Mouths only. No cheeks or, uh, other parts. It gets a little hard because they sometimes sort of run into each other but I think I’m pretty accurate. Plus or minus five, anyway.”

She looked at him, amused and flattered but also rationally skeptical. The number couldn’t possibly be that high. They hadn’t been together all that long, and she’d have to subtract all the time she spent with her parents and those first horrible days that had been filled with funerals and tears. But on the other hand, there had been some secret, wonderful days where it seemed like all they had done was kiss each other and if she averaged them all out…

“See?” Ron said smugly. “Coming up on a thousand. Cause for celebration, that, and I’ve planned accordingly. We might even get there tonight if you play your cards right.”

She stood up on her toes and kissed him. “I think we can do it.”

“And just wait until you see what I’ve got planned for ten thousand,” Ron said, pulling her closer. “And then one hundred thousand. I’ve already got them all sorted.” He gave a sad shake of his head. “You’re stuck with me, I’m afraid.”

But that was something that didn’t scare her at all.

I don’t know if you’re still doing the feminist books for a seven year old thing, but if so.

Harry Potter, because Hermione lets girls know that they can be smart, and that is AWESOME!

The Wizard of Oz, because Dorothy is a little girl who gets swept away from home, and melts the witch, and is basically just all around wonderful.

Nancy Drew, because every girl needs to pretend she is a detective at least once in her life. And this series was invented in 1930, and she’s a strong, independent heroine who solves crimes in high heels (which is a sign that she is more than human).

Anne of Green Gables, because she is loud, and outspoken, and talks too much, and so real and awesome.

ROY MUSTANG: Slytherin?

LET’S DISCUSS.
Seriously.

This lovely piece of FMA artwork had me thinking about it. And I’ll tell ya’ll why.

Of course, every time I watch a new anime, I mentally sort the characters into Hogwarts houses because that’s more important to me than zodiacs and personality types. So when I first watched Brotherhood, I put a little thought into this. And, initially, I thought, “Of COURSE Roy is a Slytherin.”

But the other day, Claudia, Joey and I were discussing Slytherin House pretty in depth which, today, makes me kind of reevaluate my sorting.

Brief overview for those who don’t know: there are four houses you can be sorted into once you start at Hogwarts. These houses are determined NOT by your traits, but your values. 

Gryffindor values courage bravery above all else.
Ravenclaw values knowledge above all else.
Hufflepuff values loyalty and hard work above all else.
Slytherin values ambition and cunning above all else.

This is why Hermione, the brightest witch of her age, was sorted into Gryffindor and not Ravenclaw. I give thee, the literal most self-defining quote ever uttered by Hermione Granger: "Books! And cleverness! There are more important things–friendship and bravery!” Thus: GRYFFINDOR. 

What exactly comprises a Slytherin? Now, there’s a ton of debate regarding the morality and ethics surrounding Slytherin House, primarily due to Rowling’s allegories to racism/white supremacy that are correlated with, you know, the bad guys. Who happen to have been in Slytherin. But, really, that doesn’t necessarily make it a direct reflection on the students within it. 

Slytherin has a bad rep, is what I’m trying to get at. But I don’t think it’s impossible for a hero to rise from that house. Anyway, that’s a whole other debate.

So, my precious Roy Boy. Let’s talk. 

Is he ambitious? Well, yeah. Arguably one of the most ambitious characters I’ve ever come across. Is he cunning? Totally. He’s a high ranking officer, yet, he never had any problem going behind the military’s back to get from Point A to Point B. Is he smart? Hell yes, he’s smart. He’s scary smart. If he weren’t brilliant, he would have never gotten as far as he did. 

But does he value that above all else? Is Roy Mustang going to do whatever it takes to make it to the top? And I know the easy answer for this is yes, but we have to remember there is something about Roy that has always set him back. Love. And Loyalty. 

Everyone KNOWS Roy is soft for his men. It’s an enormous weakness. That’s why Bradley took them away. Why Roy charged head first into an OP he was not supposed to be anywhere near, nearly costing him his own life, when he assumed the worst and thought something had happened to Riza (Actually, I could name a hundred other instances where his weakness specifically for Riza was deliberately used against him). Why he went above and beyond to get Maria Ross out of Amestris when things turned grave. Why, mortally wounded, he told Al to make sure Havoc saw a doctor when he’d gotten stabbed, and why he later told Havoc he refused to leave him behind. Why the first thing he said, after he COLLAPSED from said mortal wound, was, “Lieutenant, you’re all right.” The canonical evidence of this is never ending.

Let’s go back to the Gold Tooth Doctor scene which the plot would support is the apex of Roy’s unwavering loyalty/love/empathy/etc. The homonculi want Roy to perform human transmutation. He says no. They slice Hawkeye’s throat and say, “K, how bout now?” 

He proceeds to make variants of this face for the next ten minutes:

Which, to me, is the expression of someone who is horrified/terrified/traumatized…af, for lack of a better way of measurement. 

He sweats a lot, tears up, trembles, yells at these men, and grits his teeth as we see him actually consider performing human transmutation because it might save Hawkeye’s life.

Finally, Riza gives him a death glare and rolls her eyes toward the ceiling. After that, Roy closes his eyes in a lamenting manner and says, “All right, Lieutenant. I won’t do it.” 

EVERYONE IN THE ROOM is floored. Gold Tooth Doctor’s jaw actually drops from sheer perplexity. In comes Bradley who says, “Wow, dude. Given your track record, we were totally sure you’d cave if the life of someone dear to you was on the line.” 

And it’s that which keeps me from immediately sorting him into Slytherin. Because Roy doesn’t fool anybody. His men have always come first. Despite everything, I do not think he’d ever put his goals and ambitions above them. 

When he finally gets to Riza, she says, “You understood my signal.” Which tells us as an audience, “Holy cow. He didn’t refuse because he was going to let Riza die. He refused because he knew she had a plan.” 

That brings forth the question: would Roy have actually let Riza die if May and the others hadn’t been waiting? While bleeding out, she looked at him and said, “DO NOT SACRIFICE EVERYTHING FOR ME. DON’T DO THIS.” And I think that’s a whole other argument to be had. Riza’s a complicated character to bring into this because her autonomy is something she values, and something Roy knows she values. When she asked him to burn her array, she said something to the effect of, “Let me be Riza Hawkeye.” Not her father’s research notes. Not the keeper of Flame Alchemy. A person. Her entire character is built on this. 

I honestly believe if Roy had refused the transmutation despite her signal, it would not have been for himself or his goal. It would have been to respect a choice that she made for herself. 

But, of course, this is all speculation because that’s not how it happened in canon. 

Nevertheless, I realize that there is something Roy values more than ambition, and it’s loyalty. 

Does that make him a Hufflepuff? See, I don’t know. Do I think of Hufflepuff House when I think of Roy Mustang? 

Harry Potter is in Gryffindor, after all, and he values friendship and love just as highly, right? 

Roy’s ambition and cunning is so emphasized throughout the series that I guess it is easy to sort him into Slytherin at face value. Because, in truth, Roy did snake around when he needed to. He has irrefutable Slytherin qualities.

But does he VALUE cunning and ambition over courage or loyalty? That’s where I’m stuck.

So, I totally leave the floor open if anyone wants to discuss. I’m really interested in what my other FMA/Potterheads have to say about this. 

Am I saying Roy CANNOT be Slytherin? No. He very well could be. But I’m having difficulty sorting him there before of the aforementioned reasons. I just think he’s too soft for the people he loves where other characters aren’t nearly so much.

If Olivier were in Roy’s place, I don’t know that she would have made the same decision, as she lives by a “survival of the fittest” mentality. That to say, she’s one of the good guys. We trust her. She’s helping the protagonist. But she and Roy aren’t always morally parallel. Still, despite that and her emotional detachment, Olivier is one of the heroes.

I’m not saying she’s a Slytherin either (because I honestly think she values courage and bravery far more than ambition). But to say that Roy choosing Riza and his men over his goals isn’t exactly a no brainer. Not every character on the protagonists’ side would have made the same choices.

What do you guys think? SERIOUSLY, LET’S DISCUSS. WHERE DO YOU SORT ROY MUSTANG?

23. A large number of ravenclaws flock to the windows every time it rains, and many will run outside in a thunderstorm- either to test how the lightning affects spells, to observe the storm, or simply to dance and goof around in the rain. They’re no longer allowed to hang out the windows or stand on the balconies in ravenclaw tower to stormwatch. Not after ‘The Incident’.

edit: ‘The Incident’ happened the last time Ravenclaw won the House Cup. It involved a handful of 6th and 7th years, a thunderstorm, several psychedelic substances, and a stolen 9-foot tall metal replica of Rowena Ravenclaw’s diadem.

submitted by anon (thank you thunderstorm anon for returning to confirm the nature of The Incident. I will be forever grateful)

“Emma Watson just happened to grow up pretty” isn’t rly a great reason for why Hermione’s so conventionally beautiful in the movies bc Matthew Lewis wore fake teeth and plastic behind his ears in the later films while portraying Neville