here's a full version of my icon if anyone wants it

psycho 01 / taehyung

Originally posted by bossybishqueenbaozi

summary: ‘’scared of me?’’

note: okay so I got inspired to do a imagine of y/n and taehyung because of the japanese version of blood sweat & tears 

warning and a note: this story has some sexual harassment in it so if you are uncomfortable with reading this kind of story please stop right here, i understand this might be hurtful to some people but this is just my crazy imagination and I’m sorry if you have ever experienced anything like this and I also wish this doesn’t happen to anyone ever, i know that taehyung isn’t like this in real life this is just a story


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Yellow Diamond in Wanted

I dont normally post a lot of stuff about the show/fandom aside from my initial reaction to it, but I actually feel like I have my thoughts on this together enough to do so in this case. This post is long and full of my opinions so I’ll put it under the cut for those of you who dont want it clogging your dash, or if you dont want spoilers.

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#2016 HP/LV fic rec hub — Part 1 #1—15

So, a list for HPLV! I just put a brief description for each, so click the link of the story you want for more details! As I’m creating this at the behest of @ghurahm, there will be no noncon/dubcon, rape, or underage*. There’s absolutely no rhyme nor reason to the listing of each fic, but I’ve numbered them to make it easier to search through. I’m sorting through all my archives— which has 2000+ stories!— so I apologize for any inconsistencies in regards to the limitations set. Just please also read the author’s warning beforehand. Enjoy!
Also: Reysistantis on antis— in case you’re ever attacked for a ship or kink.

*Underage— since there is at least a 2 generation age gap between them in canon, underage will be perceived as their mindset. Since Time-traveling is also a major trope in the Harrymort/Tomarry fandom, both of them may be underage. But nothing so far apart where it might be considered statutory rape. Everyone will be mature enough to consent.
1. The Dark Lion by HecatesKiss

•Oneshot: Harry is the Dark Lord’s Assasin / Complete
* Rated E for Explicit content at the end. Can skip the ending if you prefer not to read the sex.
2. 47 Days to Change (a translation) by snow_owl

* Multi-Chaptered (ch. 48 when posting this) / WIP (work in progress)
* Rated E, but as of now there is no sexual content. The author of the fic advised that should you not want the explicit content, you can read it on under the same name/author.

“This is a ‘Harry travels back in time to raise Tom’ story. An unfortunate tale of one man’s failed attempt to mold young Tom into a decent, law-abiding citizen. Instead, as Fate will have it, young Tom grows up to become the same twisted psychopath, who is hell-bent on winning the love of his adoptive father. Harry’s consent be damned.”
3. For Voldemort and Valor by Acnara

•Oneshot— Completed.

I found it really interesting, so here it is! Cursed Child spoilers warning.
4. Republic by eldritcher

“Summary: In which the Wizarding World has been exposed to the Muggles, in which they fight a war for their existence, in which they aren’t very good at it.”

The author has a unique version of Voldemort. You’ll see what I mean. And no, this is not a crack fic. It’s actually fraught with political drama.
5. The Consort Tournament by watermelonsmellinfellon

“Summary: The Dark Lord wanted a consort and had decided to host a competition that involved nearly everyone in Britain. If they thought they were good enough, they could enter to compete in a certain amount of tasks set by the Lord of the lands himself. Only the victor would have the skills necessary to become Voldemort’s consort.
Harry unfortunately nabs the Dark Lord’s attention. Voldemort does as he pleases.
Hermione enters to win, Bellatrix takes interest in certain people, and of course there’s the villain causing trouble.
A/N: SLASH/Harrymort/AU. I’m still waiting for someone to tell me exactly how this sounds like Harry is a slave. Please do so. Nothing at all would suggest it. How about we don’t assume that because the word “consort” is involved, it must *obviously* be about slavery. Does anyone actually know what a consort is?“
6. Again and Again by Athy

"Summary: The Do-Over Fic - a chance to do things again, but this time-To Get it Right. But is it really such a blessing as it appears? A jaded, darker, bitter, and tired wizard who just wants to die; but can’t. A chance to learn how to live, from the most unexpected source. Story is high on Political intrigue. Dumbledore!bashing slytherin!harry, dark!harry, eventual slash, lv/hp”
7. Of Monsters and Men by Clarisse(transnymphtaire)

“Summary: Each child is assigned a monster from their birth until they’re at least fifteen years old. Some children gets re-assigned. Some children keeps their monsters their whole life. Some children do both.”
8. Prancing Through Time by Lytri

In which Harry is the MOD and the summary is too long to paste. I promise that it’s totally worth it— even if you just read the summary.
9. How does it feel to fall, my precious angel? By TosMichiyo

“Summary: Harry Potter is a Light Angel and also known as Dumbledore’s Golden Boy, because of the fact that he had never giving into Voldemort’s advances.
20 years ago, Tom Riddle, Harry’s partner disappeared and rumours stated that Tom Riddle had fallen, became a Dark Angel. Harry who had secretly harboured feelings for his partner is devastated, but what happens when Harry returns after 20 years? Will he finally make peace with his past? Or will the images of Tom Riddle never let him go?”

A completed series. Angel AU. Absolutely loved it!
10. Siren Song by The_Fictionist

“Summary: Siren/Merfolk AU. Harry is a sailor. Tom is a siren.”

One of many great stories from this author. Please check them all out!
11. Paper Tears by You_Light_The_Sky

“Summary: Instead of writing his name in Tom Riddle’s diary, Harry wrote a story… and the horcrux living there ate it up in fascination. “Once upon a time there was a boy who lived in a cupboard…” TMR/HP”

Be ready for some tears of your own.
12. Rebuilt by Terrific Lunacy

“Full summary: {AU!} After society as we know it collapsed, humanity struggled for survival. Following a decade of chaos and anarchy, a new society begins to establish. Lords try to assemble the best followers around them and battle other groups for territory. Young Harry Potter tries to stay out of trouble, but when a new lord with unconventional ideas sees the potential in his unique talents, his quiet life soon gets turned upside down. Armed only with his wits, Harry has to take on one catastrophe after the other, all the while trying to uncover his own past and teach a certain smug bastard the meaning of personal space. [LV/HP]”
13. Shadowed Malice by Oceanbreeze7

Summary: “11 years ago, my ‘brother’ survived the killing curse. 8 years ago I was given up for adoption. 5 years ago, my orphanage was destroyed in a bloodbath. 4 years ago I found my place at the Dark Lords side. And now, I’m going to Hogwarts, I am Harry Potter.”
14. Voldemort Goes Back to School by KisaraP

“Summary: Slash! This story replaces the Half-Blood Prince: What happens if Voldemort disguises himself as a transfer student to gain access to Hogwarts in order to kill Harry Potter? Well, I’ll give you a hint: It leads to consequences that not even Dumbledore foresaw! This story has a very original plot that has not ever been seen before. Yes, really. (Light!Harry) (Sub!Voldie) (Mpreg).”
15. A Beast’s Virtue by Arliene

“Summary: Schooled at Durmstrang, forced into political upheaval, pursued by dark and light wizards alike, Harry Potter becomes a leader and icon for his entire generation, thus turning the Dark Lord’s attention to him. HP/LV. Politician Harry.”

god you know what i really want for fgo tho.

a) dark sakura as a servant. either a caster, an avenger (bc of course) or some other ~~~~special~~~~ class. come on fgo runs on pulling out random bullshit out of its ass if rin and waver can be servants bc gods have possessed them there’s no way in hell dark sakura, who was powerful enough to eat servants up like goddamn candy, can’t reach that level through some other nasuverse asspull bullshiting. her np is of course the shadow or angra mainyu in it’s form in hf’s end and all the evils of the world plays when she activates it because of course it is, it’s a fucking iconic bgm and it’s her and anri’s bgm (and also my most favorite track ever). she also has special lines for ishtar rin, emiya, and medusa if you have them. and also her ccc clones of course.

the reason i want this? is because a while ago i was fighting gil in one of the dailies quest and he started screaming ‘onore onore onore’ as emiya killed him with ubw and it was a beautiful recreation of a very important moment, but it made me think. i really want to recreate another moment. where gil stabs sakura randomly on the street and tries to kll her and then she pops up angra who goes all ‘oy there what are you doing with my mom to be, i know i’m just barely a fetus rn but i’m goddamn angra mainyu and i am not standing for this shit’ and then they fucking eat him. i want to do that in the game again, but without sakura getting stabbed, no, i just want to have her eat gil again over and over and over like he deserves.

b) ilya as a servant. and i mean the actual ilyasviel von eizbern from the 2004 visual novel fate/stay night, you know, the REAL one. that complicated, well-rounded, human, multifaceted character with a backstory and motivations and inner conflicts and a multilayered personality of her own that i fell in love with and not the abomination prillya turned her into that has literally jack all to do with the original character and more of an unrecognizable meme version of her. they owe me this for the bullshit that is her character in prillya, for her only ce being exactly one, not even that well drawn or cool (if useful), and for not having a cool upgrade outfit like shirou, rin and sakura’s awesome 5 star ce’s have.

she’d be something a bit like caster iri i guess??? who i don’t know much about actually bc i am but a na newbie, but she would be, like, the ‘real’ ilya rather than a copy. with her own power, which is quite a lot already since we know she has ten times iri’s power, plus the grail’s power amping it up making her strong enough to be a servant. she has special lines for emiya too, probably heracles, maybe ishtarin and the hypothetical dark sakura (maybe one of the fe sakura clones), and of course assassin kerry and caster iri. idk what her np would be but i imagine it’d have to do with the command spells engraved all over– kind of a fun irony with the girl designed as the perfect master by the einzberns coming back as a servant.

c) kirei as a servant. look, if kerry can become an assassin then they can sure as hell come up with a bullshit reason for kirei too. i can actually see him as an avenger but i think assassin would be the most logical if somewhat boring choice i guess. maybe a ruler given the religious/christian themes they have so far and given amakusa was also an overseer?

anyway i imagine he’d be post-hf, but from a timeline where some other shit happened and angra was born into the world after all and through magic bullshitery it made him a servant and registered him into the throne postmortem. his skillset  would be an ironic mix of both his executor days and stuff like baptisms/sermons/prayers/exorcisms, like the one he killed zouken with– kyrie eleison would make a fantastic np for him. but with also a mix of angra maniyu’s power since it’s what made him a servant, and his original black/grail mud heart being brought back to him though that, so he’d make use of that too. special lines it would make sense for him to have: assassin kerry, gil and/or emiya (a line referencing how he knew him as shirou fu fu fu) top priority, but also ilya and sakura, either the clones already in the game or the hypothetical servants described above, and possibly amakusa????? idk man there’s a limit to these things.

now after a long post  about all the reasons i want this here is the reason i also very very much am afraid and hope it WON’T happen:

i’m already saving up for merlin and medb and vaguely holding out hope i might get scatach, knowing full well my chances of getting 3 ssrs are slim. if any of these make it into the game, i’d probably throw away all my savings just for them, and if all of them do, i’d probably just save up everything specifically for kirei, lament my inability to roll for sakura or ilya or anyone else i want bc getting kirei would be my number one priority in life, and if i didn’t get him i’d probably break my promise of never spending money on mobage again (a lesson learned from llsif) and end up emptying all my army savings over this game. so despite how much i want this i also hope, for my sake, it won’t happen.

but. but. it’s an idea  that’s nice to think about, you know.

Twin Peaks - Season 3, Parts 1 & 2 Review (Mild Spoilers)

If Twin Peaks’ original run taught us to expect the unexpected, the first two parts of Twin Peaks’ 3rd season have taught us to expect the unprecedented. Because that’s what the first two hours of this revival truly are: unprecedented television. You can look at this premiere and easily see fragments of Lynch’s earlier work in film (Eraserhead is evoked pretty strongly by a new haunting addition to the Black Lodge), but seeing something this bold, frightening and esoteric on Television is unprecedented and completely thrillingly new.

Seasons 1 and 2 broke new ground for television, ushering in a new era of cinematic sensibilities and long-form storytelling in the medium. To be this groundbreaking again, Season 3 could not go back and lean on nostalgia – as pleasing as that might be, it wouldn’t make the show feel vital. It had to break new ground again and that’s exactly what it does over the course of two hours. However, it would be remiss not to mention that there is some nostalgia to be had, particularly in the revisiting of familiar faces. It’s hard not to feel warmed and giddy at the site of Andy Brennan and Lucy Moran, who look almost identical 27 years on. It’s hard not to feel a well of emotions on hearing that iconic guitar twang on the opening credits. Hell, I was even delighted to see Jerry Horne again (David Patrick Kelly has always been one of my favourite recurring Peaks actors – instantly watchable and full of charisma).

But though they are revisited, there is not much space in these episodes for “Hey, remember this!” nostalgia, and instead there is a focus on new storylines, characters and most strikingly, new locations. In fact, most of the runtime of these episodes is not spent in Twin Peaks. Whether it’s the streets of Manhattan filmed gorgeously from above like they’re glowing and pulsing, or an oppressive grey jail cell that feels a bit like hell, Lynch’s mastery of set design and cinematography makes sure that every new location is bent and twisted into something unique and fitting within the show.

The storylines are all instantly engaging, thanks in part to Frost and Lynch’s enigmatic scripting and some top-notch performances. I didn’t think i’d find myself saying this, but Matthew Lillard is almost my favourite part of Twin Peaks. Really. In the screen-time he gets, he gives a performance that develops so quickly and fascinatingly that the most obvious comparison would be to Ray Wise’s Leland Palmer, in its magnetism. There are hints into where his story will fit into the other strands of the story, particularly “Mr. C's” story, which sees the Black-Lodge escaped Cooper-gänger living out in the world and wreaking havoc. It’s disturbing to say the least to see the excellent and nearly permanently likeable McLachlan in villainous mode, partly because he does it so effectively. It’s incredible that the same actor that brings such immense warmth to Cooper can play what is ostensibly a demon so effectively. There is intentionally very little going on behind his eyes and that makes it almost hard to look at him. His story brings levels of violence that might trouble lovers of the original series, but which should be no surprise to fans of the underrated prequel film Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me. The darkness, violence and probing explorations of these episodes make it feel like this is what Frost and Lynch had wanted to do all along. It makes you wonder how the original run would’ve turned out if they’d both had complete creative control and no network censorship, and luckily, we now get to find out.

The free reigns they have is evident in another plot strand– the most mysterious and frightening of all, which involves a New York skyscraper, a glass box and the scariest, most desperately-fumble-for-the-remote-to-turn-the-volume-down moment in Twin Peaks, or Lynch’s history. This plot, coupled with Lillard’s story, give us the meat of a gripping mystery which, though totally unlike the central Who Killed Laura Palmer, is equally as engaging and thrilling in its own bizarre way. The nightmare imagery that pervades the glass box story (i’ve got to take a second to mention the incredible sound design by Lynch in these scenes – the throbbing, droning rumbles are absolutely dread inducing. Some have complained that there wasn’t enough Badalamenti music in these episodes, and while admittedly there isn’t much of it, lets instead admire what Lynch is doing with the sound here. Incredible stuff) is dotted throughout the show, particularly in one brief jail-cell set image that comes straight from one of Lynch’s paintings and directly into your nightmares. It’s simple, inexplicable, and for me, mouth-coveringly scary.

And amongst these stories, somehow it seems to be the Black Lodge based scenes that are the most easily explained. That might have something to do with the context, and the fact that in the Black Lodge, logic is non-existent. We almost don’t need to understand what anyone in there is talking about. We can sense it instead. They are beautiful, deeply strange scenes that live up to the standard of those iconic dreams of Dale Cooper in Season 1. There might not be a dancing little man this time around, nor much dreamy jazz music, but it is just as hypnotising and gorgeously realised.

And then, just when we’re exhausted and expecting the next sucker-punch moment, we’re rewarded with a familiar, non terrifying sequence which takes us back to the bang bang bar and reunites us with some familiar faces, all while the Chromantics play their dreamy synth-pop version of a Twin Peaks song. It is almost a relief whenever we return to the town in these episodes, a brief respite to a place that, though foreboding, is at least familiar. And it’s where the heart of the show still beats. These episodes might not have the quirkiness and lightness that the original run sometimes possessed (no pun intended), but there is warmth to be felt, particularly in the interactions with The Log Lady, Margaret Lanterman, and Hawk. She has always struck me as a poignant character, one who knows too much about the human condition and human behaviour, and this seems to leave her overwhelmed and desperate to help and advise. And seeing her talk to Hawk in her soft, gentle voice, but looking so frail (actress Catherine Coulson passed away in 2015), was the closest these episodes came to choking me up. Perhaps she points the way forward as she always did, and perhaps we should remember that the beating heart and light of the show is still there, but is overwhelmed by darkness and fear.

The darkness and fear is what these new episodes are about. They seem to be set in a world where the evil has escaped from The Black Lodge and runs amok. It is hard not to think ahead and have certain hopes for the series, and it will be hard for some more casual fans to not think back and remember what the show was and wish it was still that. But I think it is still that, but a new, modified version of that. The themes are all still there only they have been presented to us in a way that lacks the comforts of the original series. But when has Lynch ever cared about comfort? And since when have we ever wanted him to?


Uncomfortable and unprecedented, these new episodes take Peaks in a bold new direction few expected, but those wishing for something genuinely new, challenging and yes, groundbreaking, will be delighted by it. A mixture of old, comforting faces mixed with dangerous new avenues make the show feel as vital as ever. I cannot wait to see where this story leads, and we can rejoice now that the show we like is coming back in style. And it’s absolutely brilliant.

So my bff wants to read my Campwolfe fanfiction. Only problem is he’s not in the fandom and only has vague idea of who those british lesbian fake surgeons you keep banging on about every time we run Serena Campbell and Bernie Wolfe actually are.  In order to bring him up to speed before he reads I decided to create a simple guide.  Sharing here for fun and also to make sure my sleep deprived brain hasn’t left out anything crucial. Please feel free to reblog with mistakes or omissions.

Bernie and Serena for Dummies: The Coles Notes Version

SERENA CAMPBELL (has been referred to by Bernie as The Fräulein)

She’s the brunette (51 and gorgeous) that prefers flowing blouses and looks like a cinnamon roll but make no mistake she could actually kill you.

Consultant, surgeon, MBA, former hospital Deputy CEO.  Used to getting what she wants. Notorious flirt.  Can charm F1’s out of the trees. Co-lead on ward called AAU at Holby City Hospital. Good at paperwork.

Penchant for shiraz and occasionally whiskey.  Mostly shiraz - in fact just throw her into the vat fully clothed. Bonus she knows where to find the key to Albie’s (Holby’s local watering hole)

Was married to Edward, alcoholic (he’s a shit), has a grown up daughter Elinor and an autistic nephew Jason who lives with her who takes up quite a bit of her time and is fairly puzzled by relationships but when he’s not sticking his foot in it his mission is to move her love life along.

Has a penchant for holding life-long take it to the grave grudges.

Mom™ and spends a lot of time on the ward listening to other people whinge on about difficulties, consoles them and generally takes care of the people in her life personally and professionally.  Hurt someone she is close to and YOU ARE DEAD TO HER. Does not suffer fools gladly. Has no room for fuck ups. Unless said fuck up is committed by  a certain blonde ex-army medic with puppy dog eyes. In that case she will forgive almost anything.

Deadpan sass queen of the century.  Has a snappy comeback for everything. Her smile could thaw Antarctica. Is good at back massages.

Has been in favour of firing anyone who is involved in inter-office romances. Her own hypocrisy not lost on her now that she has fallen for ex-Army Major.

Died-in-the-wool-heterosexual who has fallen in love with a woman and is concerned that she may now be a washed-up midlife lesbian (if that’s actually a thing)

Wears her heart on her sleeve.  Flings herself headlong into love. A hedonist at heart. Takes emotional risks. Deals well with heartbreak by pulling herself together. Gets shit done.

MAJOR BERENICE WOLFE (Bernie - also known as The Big Macho Army Medic or BMAM)

She’s the blonde (51 and gorgeous with unicorn hair) that prefers trench coats and skinny jeans. Looks like she could kill you. Could actually kill you.

Consultant, trauma surgeon, ex British army Major and incredibly brilliant surgeon who takes calculated risks that mostly work out.  Considered the most fantastic fearless doctor on AAU (according to Serena - the entire hospital) and emotionally is an actual bona fide human disaster. Crap at paperwork.

Penchant for cigarettes, especially one lone hold out she’s been carrying around for years as a symbol of her freedom and independent self.  Tries to smoke it and doesn’t. Has so much self restraint sometimes it’s possible to wonder if she has a pulse.

Was married to Marcus (also a bit of a shit) and has two grown up children Cameron (who is training to be a doctor) and Charlotte, who she is trying to get to know again as she was often stationed away from them as they were growing up. Had an affair with a woman, Alex Dawson, while in Afghanistan. Was blown up there and wheeled into Holby hospital on a spine board in one of the most iconic entrance scenes a character has been given.

In the 99th percentile in caring deeply for those she loves. In the 5th percentile in execution of demonstration of caring for said individuals.  When it comes to expressing emotion often loses the ability to speak in full sentences.  Has mastered the art of Long Lingering Looks™. Is complete crap at returning texts or emails. Runs at the first sign of emotional trouble. Likes to brood on the roof.

Her hair gets messier as her involvement in the series progresses. Looks really fabulous in scrubs of any colour. Has puppy dog eyes.  Appears hot even while expressing unwarranted jealousy.

Fiercely loyal and will have your back in a crisis.  Giver of excellent gifts but will leave your office like a complete trash pit if she takes up residence for more than a week.  Housekeeping not her strong suit but she’s excellent at boots-on-the-ground-triage. Card carrying member of Club Screw Up.

Is possibly a Lesbian™ but could be seen as bisexual. Fails to notice she has fallen in love with straight female colleague and this needs to be pointed out to her by her grownup son.  Once pointed out, ever the action woman, kisses dyed-in-the-wool-heterosexual female surgical co-lead right on the mouth while sitting on the floor in theatre because she ‘wants to’. Has not properly thought out next steps. Back-pedals.

Co-creator (with Serena) of AAU’s new trauma unit. Throws arm wrestling contest in favour of allowing straight co-lead (who she really ‘likes’) to dominate. Excellent at removing tap sets out of patients nether regions without falling into fits of laughter. Is pants at freehand drawing.

Professional life: Nerves of steel. Calm as shit. Personal life: Panics.

Bernie and Serena: The Relationship

They meet.  They banter.  They operate. They bond. They wrangle. They arm wrestle. They drink shiraz. They smile. They exchange cute nicknames. They Kiss™. They have a sapphic angst-fest. They Kiss 2.0™-The Office Edition. They have a sapphic angst-fest separation. They reunite. They Kiss 2.1.0™ -The Locked Office Remix Edition

Some hospital property might be destroyed in the process.

Their love can be seen from space. 


ROSE REVIEWS… THE X-FILES - S1.E5: The Jersey Devil

<< 1.4 Conduit —————————————- 1.6 Shadows >>

I was feeling snarky so decided to unwind with another of my very serious and scholarly X-Files recaps. The Jersey Devil is one of my more favourite S1 episodes because of the number of ridiculous things that happen…but how did it stand up to my vague attempts to quantify my love of this show rigorous scoring rubric? Find out under the cut with gifs and random unconnected observations galore…

Laugh now Scully… while you can…

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So, if I have ultimate directorial control over Starlight Express, with the only provisos being that it is performable, and entertains the audience, this is how I would do it…

Song List:


Rolling Stock

Call Me Rusty (short)

Lotta Locomotion


Entry of Nationals


Pumping Iron

Coda Freight

He Whistled At Me

Race 1

There’s Me

Poppa’s Blues

Belle’s Song

Race 2

Laughing Stock

Starlight Express

Parade/Pearl Twirl


Girls’ Rolling Stock

Wide Smile, High Style

Uphill Final

You’re No Engine

Right Place, Right Time

Starlight Sequence

Rusty and Dustin

Dinah’s Disco

Downhill Final

No Comeback

One Rock'n'Roll Too Many

Only You

Light At The End Of The Tunnel


So this list includes named scenes of “recit” more or less, the sung-through dialogue, so the list seems intimidating as a running order but in fact it’s not significantly more than the current approx 2 hour show.

First off, the biggest change I’m making here, Electra is female. In the original cast, Electra was understudied by Nancy Wood, and seems that his big thing about “Switch and change my frequency” was as much bigender as bisexual. Indeed, the 1987 “Concept” album that was produced in place of a Broadway cast album has AC/DC sung by a woman. So I’m restoring the concept rather than coming up with something new. This also tackles the biggest problem of misogyny within the show, that all the engines are big strong males, and the female characters are all decorative, passive players in the game. This also opens up the male/female balance a bit, giving us 9 female roles (including Belle of course) to 15 male. It’s a bit of an improvement at least. However this does lead to issues, where in newer versions of the show there’s a love triangle with Pearl choosing between Rusty and Electra. While I’d love to explore the emotional depths of a young girl dealing with her first “girl crush”, I don’t think Starlight really offers us the platform, so again reverting to the original, where she’s dreaming of her dream train, and incidentally agrees to race with Electra as she otherwise didn’t have a partner at all.

Generally, I want the cast to have a fair amount of flexibility with tick-overs (distinctive character based ad-libs and repeated motions) and playing about with the characters, to emphasise the human side of the anthropomorphic characterisation, while costume and story reinforce the toy train elements.


The magical orchestral overture, complete with the toy trains that had been running round the set during incoming magically coming to life! (Skate-round by cast in near blackout) The sweeping repetitions of the “Starlight Express” melody build and build, and something magical is about to happen, when -

Rolling Stock

We’re run over by a diesel train! Loud rock interruption as the reigning champion introduces himself, with his gang of anonymous black diesel engines. Dazzling spectacle of skating tricks and aggression, bit of breaking 4th wall to interact with audience in dance break.

Call Me Rusty (short)

Later London version. Little Rusty the steam shunter gets pushed around by Greaseball and gang (But not the Nationals with their “where’s my schedule!”, not got Nationals on yet) Rusty goes to fetch the coaches, indignant and angry, not taking sufficient care pulling the coaches.

Lotta Locomotion

Original version, each coach having a verse to herself. Cute, bouncy, peppy, introducing us to the girls. No slow version of “He Whistled”.


Original version, including Caboose. Plenty of interaction between the freight, coaches, and Rusty watching off to one side.

Entry of Nationals

Control announces the start of the racing, each competitor comes forward, starting with Greaseball, then all 6 Nationals (including Princey) and as he’s finishing, Control announces a slight problem, a power drain, all the lights dim, all the characters (Coaches, Freight, Nationals, Rusty) power down…


And a single laser pierces the gloom, spreads to a cone, and strange shadowy shapes appear, the first has a gun! The components introduce themselves, complete with New London banter (Electra must be rich to have his own repair truck!/or unreliable, hurhur…) The bridge spins amidst flashing lights, and here SHE COMES… She’s smooth, elegant, effortlessly powerful and in control. Her five components respond to her slightest gesture, her presence is hypnotic. She controls electricity and magnetism, pulling anyone she wants to her. And Pearl is the newest, shiniest thing there, she pulls the coach closer, and everyone else spirals around them, until Electra breaks the formation to finish the song.

Pumping Iron

As Electra takes her applause, a furious Diesel is heard from the back of the auditorium. Greaseball comes in full speed, as different to Electra as imaginable, all testosterone manliness. Electra and components retreat to the side of the stage, the freight and nationals are around the back and other side. As Greaseball sings, he pulls first fiery Joule, then ice queen Volta into dancing with him. After watching a few moments, Electra storms off in disgust while Greaseball dances rock'n'roll moves on wheels with the girls. The freight and Nationals are ticking over or boogeing along, with quite a lot of freedom for the performers to ad-lib. Greaseball finishes, posing, with “Man, I am SO Beautiful, I’m Pumping Iron”.

Coda Freight

Electra comes back in, zaps Greaseball to get his attention, and formally challenges him to race. Control announces that everyone needs to find a partner, and one by one, the competitors pick partners. At the end, Pearl finds herself having missed out, as each engine who came forward wasn’t right, and another wagon got there first. Rusty hasn’t entered as a racer, but asks Pearl what’s wrong. She’s waiting for her dream train to whistle at her – Rusty volunteers he has a whistle? But no, that’s not right. Pearl drifts off into a dream…

He Whistled At Me

Rather than Pearl deliberating between two “lovers”, one of whom she met 5 minutes ago, Pearl sings an upbeat number about her dream train… who sounds remarkably like a steam train who she might have just been having a conversation with. But not quite. A more confident, more accomplished steam train.

Purse, Electra’s money truck, appears and pleads with Pearl to race with his mistress. Pearl asks if Electra can whistle – Purse is shocked and disgusted at the suggestion. But, Pearl can race with Electra or sit in the sidings, so she follows Purse.

Race 1

Four race structure – four engines, two winners make the final. The melodies in the race music reflect the action, different tunes representing different competitors. Call Me Rusty, Wide Smile, No Comeback…

Greaseball – Dinah

Bobo – Ashley

Turnov – Caboose

Hashamoto – Volta

The first race is a dirty business, a lot of underhand cheating between Greaseball and Caboose. First Turnov is incapacitated, then Caboose breaks Volta and steals Hashamoto. Then he drives Hashamoto into a crash while Greaseball slows Bobo enough to pass and take first place. Bobo and Ashley take the second place. Technically the other two racers don’t even complete the race.

Dinah is upset that they cheated, which angers Greaseball and he dumps her. Caboose comes in to talk to Greaseball, and sees Dinah crying in the corner. He makes to leave with Greaseball, but returns to sing to Dinah.

There’s Me

Duet version, Caboose gently lifts Dinah’s spirits and encourages her. But what are his motives? He seems genuinely sweet and caring for her, but has just conspired to throw the race with her now ex-boyfriend.

Poppa’s Blues

Poppa is in the freight yard with the freight – Rockies, Flat-top, and Dustin. He’s singing the Blues – a song with no direct relation to the show, but it’s somewhat iconic. The Freight are ad-libbing, the Rockies showing off dance moves.

A depressed Rusty comes in, he’s in love with Pearl but she wouldn’t believe he was the engine for her, and he didn’t qualify for a place in the race so can’t prove himself. But Poppa’s not listening, he’s remembering the days when he was a winner, him and his old sleeping car…

Belle’s Song

From behind an old buffer, emerges Belle, singing of her past glory days. She may not have looks and youth, but experience is important… Poppa and Belle tell Rusty to believe in the Starlight Express, to not give up hope.

Control interrupts and announces the cancellation of the British train – to Rocky 1’s devastation, he’s lost his race partner. But that means there’s a free space! Poppa and Belle turn to Rusty, but he’s sulking. Not without Pearl. Poppa instead turns to Belle, and they couple up to race one last time.

Race 2

Electra – Pearl

Poppa – Belle

Ruhrgold – Joule

Espresso – Buffy

A real generation clash – Electra and Pearl are a much lighter and more agile team, and Electra has the ability to shock her opponents. But she is also over-confident and lacking strategy, and grossly under-estimated the older pair. Joule, Electra’s component, works to derail Espresso and Buffy, but wants second place for herself and Ruhrgold. But at the last minute they’re overtaken by Poppa and Belle.

Laughing Stock

the Freight and non-racing Components gathered at the finish line – the components left with their winning mistress, and Rusty and Freight rush over to congratulate Poppa. But he collapses in exhaustion, too old to race anymore. He begs Rusty to take his place, but Rusty turns away. Greaseball and his gang burst in, and mock Rusty, pushing him around. Electra, Pearl and Components sweep in, Pearl sings that this might be her dream – they won after all! Then a little voice, Caboose encourages Rusty to try, he’s got a friend… Rusty symbolically takes Poppa’s helmet and agrees to race.

Starlight Express

Rusty, left alone, reflects on the legend of the Starlight Express. But he doesn’t believe this train is real, and asks for a sign, something to have faith in.

**Interval! Get a drink. You’ve earned it.**

Parade/Pearl Twirl

Act 2 begins with an orchestral entr'acte, stating the Starlight Express theme, “Call Me Rusty” and “He Whistled At Me”, and flings us into a confusion of an argument as characters appear from all over, laughing at Rusty, Electra mocking Greaseball for racing with a Dining car – good point, Greaseball’s left her. Maybe he’ll have Pearl instead. Control tries to take control, and Greaseball invites Pearl, breaking Dinah’s heart again as her best friend takes up with her ex. Electra is furious too, but they’re all swept up in the quest for Victory. (no godawful painfully dated Rap please!)


Dinah is left behind when Greaseball and Pearl skate off right past her, Belle, Ashley and Buffy come over and get her to open up. Dinah is a little bit over-dramatic in her devastated grief. But her friends stay with her.

Girls’ Rolling Stock

With Dinah in a puddle on the floor, the older coaches pick her up and encourage her to fight back and get her man back.

Wide Smile, High Style

Caboose meets in secret with Greaseball and some of his gang. Greaseball wants to know what he’s doing helping Rusty, but Caboose explains that he’s going to swing it so Greaseball wins. They’ve not yet seen what Rusty is capable of, and on his own he might be a threat. But Caboose will fix it. (No Electra, Caboose and Greaseball, and Gang sing the number. Electra knows nothing about Caboose’s machinations)

Uphill Final

Greaseball – Pearl

Electra – Dinah

Rusty – Caboose

Bobo – Ashley

The race is cancelled halfway through – Greaseball and Electra have gotten so tangled fighting, Ashley’s checking Dinah’s ok rather than letting Bobo get ahead, and Rusty and Caboose have taken the lead. Greaseball yells at Caboose to “Break him/Brake him” (Gotta love Stilgoe puns!) And Caboose sends Rusty crashing down the bowl from the upper level. Control calls a 15 minute break before the re-run, and the marshalls come in to break up the fights and clear up the wreck.

You’re No Engine

Rusty blames Caboose right away, but the Marshalls ignore him. Greaseball and Caboose congratulate each other, and Pearl finally twigs it was a set up, and threatens to tell the marshalls. Each move she makes takes her further from her dream train. Caboose mocks the broken and bruised Rusty, showing just how insane he truly is, drunk on the destruction.

Poor Rusty limps off away from the crash site, and happens across the Rockies.

Right Place, Right Time

The Rockies share their own unique brand of bleak encouragement. You’ll never win, accept it. The three brothers show off their best tricks, breakdancing on wheels. If even these magnificently fit fighters can’t win, what hope has Rusty got? None.

Starlight Sequence

Alone again, an absolutely rock-bottom Rusty cries out the Starlight Express, this legendary engine who Poppa is so sure can help. Mystical lights shine in the darkness, the Starlight Express theme builds from the quietest whisper, Rusty cries out for the Starlight Express – and is answered! By a warm, strong, somehow familiar voice, telling him to look within himself and he can achieve anything. Finally convinced by being in the presence of this mythical spirit, Rusty promises “I won’t let you down”.

Rusty and Dustin

As Rusty picks himself and his race helmet up to head back to the races, he hears a cough. Dustin had been napping nearby, and swears he saw it too… They head off back to the races.

Dinah’s Disco

Dinah, Electra, and components swoop in. Dinah is not impressed with racing with this Electric engine, she’s lacking essential apparatus! Dinah has had it, and isn’t racing any further. Electra, unperturbed by this, calls Caboose to be her race partner. Electra, having had no involvement in the scheming earlier, doesn’t realise why this is a bad idea…

The racers for the downhill final assemble, including Rusty with Dustin, the big heavy coal hopper, the least likely race partner (who at this point hasn’t raced at all)

Downhill Final

Greaseball – Pearl

Electra – Caboose

Bobo – Ashley

Rusty – Dustin

It’s a dirty race from the outset. Greaseball knocks Bobo and Ashley out early on, giving Electra and Rusty a lead. But Dustin’s too heavy, they fall behind. Electra tries to zap Greaseball, but misses, getting Pearl and injuring her. She’s careening out of control, but Rusty gives up his pace to rescue her. In the meantime, Greaseball, Electra, and Caboose are bickering and fighting, Caboose getting more and more erratic and switching between them. Rusty and Dustin overtake at the last minute, Electra crosses the finish line behind them, alone, and Greaseball and Caboose never emerge from the tunnel.

Everyone else is, of course, waiting at the finish line to congratulate the winner, but Rusty immediately leaves singing “I must find Pearl”. Electra limps across the finish line in his wake…

No Comeback

Electra is pissed. She has just lost the race in front of EVERYBODY. She zaps electricity back and forth, tries to summon her components but her control over them is sporadic and they fight free. She storms off in a shower of sparks and flashes and following blackout.

One Rock'n'Roll Too Many

The only light visible is a glow from the tunnel, and a wreck emerges, Caboose and Greaseball have gotten entangled and crushed together. The Freight, Components, Nationals, Ashley and Buffy, are all watching their humiliating and entertaining defeat.

Poppa and Belle roll in, demanding to know what’s happened to Rusty. Dustin tells them he went looking for Pearl – where’s Pearl? Greaseball and Caboose are dragged up to take everyone to where they last saw her.

Only You

Pearl, on her own and injured, stops to reflect that her one true friend, the one who really loves her, has been there all the time and she’s behaved awfully towards him, and her best friends. Oh dear. Rusty finds her, and she apologises for making him lose the race. But he didn’t lose, she made him win! (She sings the simpler solo version of the original song, the “Du Allein” version rather than the huge belt version or the more modern over-produced version)

Poppa and the ensemble catch up with them to give Rusty congratulations for winning, and getting the girl. Greaseball and Caboose have gotten that far then collapsed, no longer wrecked together. Dinah can’t help being moved to pity poor injured Greaseball, and she accepts his apology.

Light At The End Of The Tunnel

Poppa suggests that Greaseball could be converted to Steam, which has the appeal of being independent from Control, who takes exception at this. Poppa then leads a rousing song about hope and steam power. At some point Electra comes back onstage in time for bows, possibly not until the megamix. She and Caboose finish the show unredeemed- Caboose has has his come-uppance in that he caused the crash and cost Electra the championship, but Electra has left in a storm of humiliation. As a character she has no reason to be happy clappy along with the end of the story, so it would make sense for her not to come back til the megamix I guess?


Fun recap of the characters and songs – extended bows essentially, plus audience interaction, cheesy but a lot of fun! Then in the German tradition, the band run onstage for a final bow with the cast, and switch to canned exit music.


Welcome to the DAI Tattoo and Blood Smear Import (+ Freckles) mod!

If you don’t care about any of the mod preamble and just want to know how to install it, you can skip down to the “installation” section; otherwise, read on! This mod contains two main areas of function, broken down as follows:

  1. Tattoos: This mod has imported all tattoos available to humans (and thus to your Hawke) in DAI. They work just like the regular tattoos from DA2, with all of the same color options, and will be compatible with any mods to grant additional tattoo colors or to add other custom tattoos. This is done for anyone who, like me, grew more attached to their Hawke’s DAI tattoos than to the one they chose in DA2 and/or was bothered by the tattoo inconsistency between the games. While I would love to do a reverse version of this and import the DA2 tattoos into DAI as well, I currently have no experience with the DAI modding frameworks beyond what was required to export these tattoos, and cannot do it at this time. If anyone does come up with a mod to import the DA2 tattoos into DAI, I will gladly link it here!
  2. Complexions: This mod has created 14 new complexions for your Hawke to use. This mod is meant to give you the ability to use all of the blood smear options offered by DAI. When DAI offered the blood smear options for custom Hawkes in DAI, I grew very attached to them, as I was able to give my Hawke both the iconic nose streak and a tattoo. Because DA2 doesn’t have a separate blood smear slider and there’s no way that I know of to add one, I created them as complexions so that they could be mixed and matched with the tattoos. In addition, as part of this mod, I created two freckle options - one for a smattering of freckles only over the nose, and another for full-face freckles. In addition to basic faces with these freckle options, I have replicated these freckle options for all blood smears, meaning it is now possible to give your Hawke a blood smear, freckles and a tattoo all at once!

A note regarding complexion textures: Due to the way I had to implement the blood smear options, all of the blood smear and/or freckle complexions are made using the second complexion of the base complexion slider (as that seemed like a neutral option that would suit all Hawkes.) I could fairly easily make additional complexions with the blood smear and freckle options to correspond to any of the other basic complexions; however, if I were to offer every single option for every single complexion, I would have to make at least 75 complexions, which could be made but would likely crash the complexion slider. As a result, if you are very attached to adding freckles and/or a blood smear to another complexion base for your Hawke, you can absolutely ask and I’ll probably upload it for you, but I will not be providing all possibilities unless they are specifically asked for. Similarly, this mod only offers the DAI-style blood smears; if you are particularly attached to using the DA2 style blood smear, there are other mods to do so (I recommend picking up the “Textures for CC” or “Textures for CC - Eyebrow Add-on” files offered here:, but to the extent of my knowledge none of them add freckles, so if you are very, very attached to the DA2 style blood smear with freckles, shoot me the complexion you want as a base and the freckle type and I’ll probably upload that for you.

A note regarding permissions: I give blanket permission to extract and modify these files and use them in other mods or model exports as long as you credit me. You may also use them in any graphics or similar edits freely; I don’t require credit for these (and probably couldn’t really stop you even if I wanted?) but it’d probably be good to mention it so that other people can pick up the mod if they want. (Dropping a note letting me know you’re using it would feed my vanity nicely as well, but isn’t mandatory.)

Recommended Complementary Mods:

Natural Skin (gives you way more skin tones, something sorely needed with the rather lacking range in vanilla DA2):

DA2-style Nose Smear for all Hawkes: (You’re looking for the “Textures for CC” or “Textures for CC - Eyebrow Add-on” files. You may be interested in the companion face meshes, too, but beware if you have custom Hawke siblings, as I believe it can override their skin tone.)


If you are using the Nexus Mod Manager: click that nifty “Install with manager” button.

If you do not already have any other mods that modify your character creator (meaning you do not already have a chargenmorphcfg.xml file in your “Override” folder), you may simply unzip this mod and copy and paste its files into your “Override” folder.

  • IMPORTANT: If you do not know where your “Override” folder is, it is found under the same Dragon Age 2 folder that stores your user data (this is the same Dragon Age 2 folder where any screenshots taken in-game will be stored). This will usually be found in your “My Documents” or “Documents” folder, in the “Bioware” folder, and is NOT the one found under your Program Files. This should  be the case for both Macs and PCs, but if you have wound up with an alternate filepath, try to find your in-game screencaps folder and navigate up to the “Dragon Age 2” folder. Once you are in this folder, go into “packages”, then “core”. There should already be a folder named “override” in here; if there is none, and are sure you are in the right location, you may create one. Once in the “override” folder, you can just paste the files there.

If you already have another mod that modifies your character creator: First, place the “DAI CC Imports.erf” file into your Override folder. Then find the “chargenmorphcfg.xml” file that is already in there (it may be within a nested folder; poke around). Once you have found it, you have two options:

1. You may use this tool - - to merge your existing chargenmorphcfg.xml with the one provided with this mod.
2. You may open your existing chargenmorphcfg.xml file in Notepad or Notepad++ and follow these steps:

a.) Find the line that reads “</tattoos>”. On the line above it, paste the following code:

<!– DAI Tattoos –>

<resource name=“ImportedTats\dai_tat_01_0t”/>

<resource name=“ImportedTats\dai_tat_02_0t”/>

(The “<!– DAI Tattoos –>” is not actually necessary, but will make it easier to keep track of what is what.)

b.) Find the line that reads “</skins>”. Above it, paste the following code:

<!– DAI Blood Smears and Freckles –>

<!– No Smears, Only Freckles –>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidan0smrnsfrckl_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidan0smrfullfcfrckl_0d”/>

<!– Nose Smear (Iconic) –>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidanssmrpln_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidanosesmrnosefrckl_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidanosesmrfullfrckl_0d”/>

<!– Eye Side Smear –>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidaeyesidesmrpln_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidaeyesidesmrnosefrckl_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidaeyesidesmrfullfrckl_0d”/>

<!– Not-Qunari Smear (the one that looks kinda like the Qunari warpaint but is for humans) –>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidantqnrismrpln_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidantqnrismrnosefrckl_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidantqnrismrfullfrckl_0d”/>

<!– Raccoon Smear (Look it was this or “Bucky Smear”.)–>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidarccnsmrpln_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidarccnsmrnosefrckl_0d”/>

<resource name=“BloodSmearComplexions\mt_hed_kidarccnsmrfullfrckl_0d”/>

(I do not apologize for my comments.)

c.) Save the file. You should be all set!

As with all of my other mods, please feel free to contact me if you notice any issues or have any problems with installation, as well as if you have another requested complexion.

Happy DA2-ing!

Thank you, thank you, thanks. Thank you very much. I’m honored to be with you tonight, and frankly, I’m blown away from this honor. I also realize I say ‘like’ a lot, so I should work on that. I guess it’s official now, and I hope the whole world knows that I am an ally of the Human Rights Campaign. This is my very first time ever to the Twin Cities, and I was very excited when my plane landed so I could find my people. You know, I asked the cab driver to start by dropping me off at Lush, followed by Fun Snaps, and the saloon, and the nineties too. I made him slam on the brakes at Ninth and Nicollet when I saw a great crowd of good-looking gay men, and I guessed that must be the hottest gay bar in Minneapolis, but no one told me it was Target’s corporate offices. But now I know. There are so many great people I’ve worked with over the years that I love. Two I’d like to shine a light on that I’m especially grateful to are Jamie Babbit, the director of But I’m a Cheerleader, who always takes credit for making me a lesbian icon. I guess. Thanks, sure, I’ll take it. And more recently to Jenji Kohan for picking up where Cheerleader left off and giving me the great role of Nicky Nichols in Orange is the New Black. Thank you. In But I’m a Cheerleader, you saw some of it, I played a young all-American girl named Megan who gets shipped off by her parents to a gay rehab when they suspect she’s a lesbian. I sometimes like to fantasize that Nicky is the adult, thug version of Megan from Cheerleader who could have stood up for herself and protected her from her insane parents. You know, even though the tone of the film was light, I’ll never forget how confusing it was to process that gay rehab was a real thing that was happening in our world. As a teenager reading the script for Cheerleader, I was horrified to come to terms with the stark fact that not everyone intuitively understood the basic facts of life: that none of us chooses our sexual orientation or our gender identity. Duh. Nonetheless, as I matured, I realized we have a responsibility to use our voices to help the ignorant people understand the vicious impact of their bigotry and shape their values to embrace acceptance and equality. Man, man, would we teach Kim Davis a lesson if she showed up in prison with us at Orange is the New Black. but anyway, you know, over the years, I have been linked to many extraordinary women, namely Rosie O'Donnell and Clea DuVall pop to mind. You know, sadly, I’ve never had the opportunity to sleep with either of them, though I love them both majorly. You know, I did want to take the opportunity tonight to clarify I’ve only actually gotten to sleep with three girls: my friend Lizzie, my friend Nicole, she’s from Minnesota, and a prostitute I ordered out of the Yellow Pages as a curious teenager. Don’t worry, we used a dental dam. Did anyone else ever use those? I mean, who uses those? This is a true story. I’m not kidding. Anyway, my point is it’s crucial for everyone to have the basic freedom of experimentation and open mindedness in this life. I mean, how are we to figure out who we are in a safe way when we’re living in fear? My stance on this is I hope I remain as open minded in my twilight years as I was as a teenager. I mean, let me paint you a picture of myself in the 90s in New York City. I remember being thirteen, riding the bus to school, reading about Gertrude Stein, while looking out the window and seeing these posters of Kate Moss on these Calvin Klein billboards and thinking, ‘Who would I rather be?’ I mean, the answer was obvious for me. The goal was to someday have a salon full of equal-minded troublemakers and someone as great as Alice B. Toklas and not to be a contrived idea force-fed by the media. That just seemed like a royal pain in the ass. Some years later, in my twenties, I remember becoming obsessed with this book by Diana McLellan called The Girls, in which she wrote about lavender Hollywood. Everyone from Garbo to Dietrich and Hepburn gets name-checked, and their affairs reflected the high-end sexual morales of their times. Amidst all these glamorous ghosts, I remember being particularly taken with the amorous chain between the famous anarchist Emma Goldman and the legendary silent film star Alla Nazimova, the exotic actress who became the founding mother of sapphic Hollywood. Nazimova, like me, suffered from great stage fright, so Emma, her friend, would come backstage– and by the way, this is true– she would give her vulvic massage to alleviate the tension! True story! I mean, how cool is that? Well, I was thrived to that ACDC backstage ritual ever since, and I am so grateful that, even though I’m not gay, Lea DeLaria continues to be there for me in this way each day before we do a scene in prison! It’s very nice of her, she’s very generous. My only regret is that she wasn’t here tonight. Now some of you may think it’s a recent thing that people think that I’m gay, that it’s my onscreen roles and my pension for loafers in real life that have created this aura, but that’s not actually true. This all came up years ago at the Rabbi Joseph H. Lookstein Upper School of Ramaz on New York’s Upper East Side. Well, as you may guess from that handle, it was an incredibly uptight Orthodox Jewish school from Manhattan’s elite. And there I was, a scholarship kid living with a single mother. Suffice to say, I did not fit in. But I’m over it, clearly. Well, I must have been about twelve or thirteen years old when I discovered that someone had scratched the words ‘Natasha is a lesbian’ into my desk. I was a preteen. Of course I knew what lesbian meant. However, a million feelings came through me when I read it, and I wondered why someone had written it there on my desk for everyone to see. Was I special or odd? Was my personality too big? Was my hair too big? Is it that I spoke my mind? Was someone sending me a warning? Was it meant to shock me or label me? Was it that I made them afraid? I never found out, but I did learn one thing that I kept my whole life long: words have power, and so do labels and identities. I’ve been lucky to go through this life doing the work that I love, and in return being loved and respected by others, not allowing anyone to label me, and more importantly, not allowing myself to be limited by any labels. If you’re a lesbian or not, or a gay man or not, or bisexual or not, or happen to be transgender or questioning, you came here tonight in solidarity for the same reason I did: to just have the damn freedom to be yourself in this world, no matter what it takes. Receiving this award is very moving to me, but let’s remember it’s now 2015. Shouldn’t everyone be an ally by now? Shouldn’t we all earn this award by now? Equality under the law should be the oxygen we breathe and the real religion we practice in America. Until that day truly arrives, this award reminds me not so much of how far we’ve come, but also serves a reminder of how far we have yet to go. I am sincerely proud to be your ally and to share my love with you and the Human Rights Campaign. Thank you so much.
—  Natasha Lyonne’s acceptance speech for the Human Rights Campaign’s Outstanding Leadership in the LGBT Community Award
Ever After High: Let’s Talk About THAT SCENE in Dragon Games

A point-counterpoint piece about that scene in Battle the Queen. Yes, that one. Short version: it’s not a gimmick, we’re not reading too much into it, and it does matter. Full version below the fold because it’s long and image-heavy and out of respect for certain people among my followers whom I’ve managed to convince to watch EAH and don’t want spoiled.

Keep reading

Slaykwan, King of Karaoke

Omg hi admins! Congrats on 1.1k, you guys deserve it <3

okay here’s my entry for the “You Write: Drabble Game” with my lovely boo. I will admit I died multiple times writing this bc fLUFF (but I’m lowkey romance trash so it also brought me to life)

Hope you like it! also I hope it isn’t too long

Seriously, things like this just didn’t happen in real life.

The situation you currently found yourself in should have been a scene in a movie. Case in point:  you were standing on a crappy makeshift stage made from stacked wooden crates, with a microphone clutched in your hand like a dagger and your mouth pressed into the thin line which formed your trademark ‘ready-to-kill’ look (your best friend Jihoon’s voice conveniently chose that moment to remind you that that was not how you were meant to hold expensive audio equipment). All your shyness – seriously, where had the quiet person drinking sparkling water alone gone? – was thrown to the wind as you engaged in a fierce staring contest with the random, but admittedly attractive, guy who shared your stage at your co-worker Seokmin’s annual Christmas Karaoke party.

You were going to kill Seokmin later; he had obviously thought it would be hilarious to drag the nervous, camera-shy you onto the stage to engage in a final death round against this- this singing anomaly. What the heck was his name again? Seungmin? Seungquack? Oh, right – it was Seungkwan, something you only remembered because he had sassed you before going onto the stage, bragging that his friends had dubbed him ‘Slaykwan, King of Karaoke’ in an attempt to psyche you out before you guys took to the mic.

Hmph. As if. You definitely were not intimidated by this cute, talented vocal prodigy with a devastating smile, five-octave range and Beyonce’s dance moves to boot.

His narrowed gaze was intense as his eyes roamed you, looking for any signs of cowardice or weakness. He was waiting for you to concede defeat, you knew, but he wouldn’t get it; being an introvert with a hugely competitive streak had its advantages, most notably in the way anyone you found yourself opposing had a tendency to underestimate you. Just like now.

“Play another song!” you growled for the fifth time in a row at Seokmin, who was manning the karaoke machine. He had been looking between you and Seungkwan with a slightly panicked look on his face – clearly, he hadn’t expected the battle to get this passionate – but at your demand, he jumped, looking sheepish.

“Are you sure?” he chuckled, sounding slightly nervous. “Maybe we should get someone else on the sta-”

“NO!” Both you and Seungkwan exclaimed at the same time, still staring at each other.

Really, the only universe in which this scene made sense was the one in which the two of you were the main characters in some cheesy rom-com drama, or maybe a Disney movie. This could have been High School Musical – if Gabriella and Troy had engaged in a ruthless six-song sing off, all for a stacked three-patty beef burger and a boosted ego.

Or not. If this was High School Musical, you two would probably be exchanging phones and punching in your numbers by now beneath a romantic night sky exploding with fireworks, but that was the last thing on your mind. Boo Seungkwan was going down.

Seokmin sighed. “Fine, but this is your last song!”

The first few twinkling bars of “All I Want for Christmas Is You” began to play, and you cleared your throat in anticipation. It wasn’t the song you would have picked, but you could bust out some Mariah if you were put on the spot. Unfortunately for you, Seungkwan’s eyes lit up like the nose on Santa’s favourite reindeer, and he raised his eyebrows at you as if to say ‘don’t even bother.’

“I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need…”

You two began to sing, trading lines as the duet version of the song dictated on the wide screen in front of you. A slight blush crossed your cheeks as you progressed through the song; the way the lines were distributed made it a definite couple’s song, with each person singing their lines to their duet partner in a sweet Christmas jingle. Seokmin had given up on being annoyed at you two, and was now standing in front of you, trying to get you guys to do a ridiculous Christmas dance to no avail. A minute and a half passed, and you were feeling a lot more confident as you continued without making any devastating mistakes. Seungkwan had relaxed as well, and you even exchanged a fun, cheery (and slightly flirtatious on his part) look; there was no way anyone could resist the irrefutably festive vibes the iconic Christmas song elicited.

The song was almost ending now, and you both were getting completely into it, singing loudly with completely ridiculous smiles on your faces. It was a few seconds before you realised what was approaching, and suddenly, the competitiveness was back. Seungkwan was watching you with a slight smirk on his face, his face lit up in anticipation. The deciding factor for this song’s winner – and thus the person who would come out of this with a burger and unbroken pride – was coming up: Mariah Carey’s glorious high notes.

“Oh baby all I want for Christmas…is…YOUUU-”

At the same time, you and Seungkwan reached into your highest registers and unleashed your most ear-splitting falsettos. Surprise filled you at how effortlessly you managed to hit it – you hadn’t been expecting it to be that smooth at all – as well as at how well yours and Seungkwan’s voices seemed to meld and complement each other.

He’s such a good singer, you thought enviously as you held onto the note-

-and that was when Seungkwan’s voice cracked.


“I can’t believe my voice cracked,” Seungkwan moaned for the third time, sitting beside you with his head in his hands.

You rolled your eyes and pushed the plate with the other half of your monster three-patty burger – your prize - towards him. “Shut up and eat. If you can’t leave with in-tact pride, at least leave with a full stomach.”

He picked it up reluctantly and took a morose bite. “So much for Slaykwan,” he mumbled around his mouthful of beef burger.

You bit your lip, wondering if what you were going to say next was a good idea. It couldn’t hurt; he was attractive, surprisingly charming and, even if he rejected you, it wasn’t like you’d see him again until next year’s Christmas party. Plus, his dance moves were so ludicrous that you’d probably have a good laugh if you saw them in action a second time. “I’ll give you a chance to reclaim your honour, if you like.”

 “Really?” He instantly perked up. “How?”

“Karaoke here again. Seokmin’s New Year’s party.”

Seungkwan beamed and took another bite from his burger, this time much more enthusiastically. “That sounds nice, but I think I’d like to see you again before that. Are you free on Saturday?”

When you and Seungkwan got up to leave, pointedly ignoring Seokmin’s suggestive waggling eyebrows, it was dark. There weren’t any fireworks, but it didn’t make it any less sweeter when you said your goodnights and exchanged numbers. As you got into your taxi, he grinned.

“I’ll text you tonight, O Fair Challenger.”

“Don’t be cheesy,” you berated him, although you smiled.

It might have been a scene from a cheesy rom-com drama, but you had high hopes. They all had happy endings, after all.

Written by @bee-seokkwan

Thank you for your submission.

Taylor Swift's Epic '1989' Tour: Every Night With Us Is Like a Dream

Welcome to New York! Ish! Taylor Swift brought it all back home last night, or at least to New Jersey’s MetLife Stadium, for her 1989 Tour. Never one to do things halfway, Swift has made this a pop show — or rather the pop show, as far as 2015 is concerned. It was a two-hour pop-blitz spectacle, where the songs retain all the teardrops-on-my-guitar intimacy of her early days, except blown up into massive electro-warrior emotional avalanches pushing the can’t-even-ometer into the red. This show had it all: life lessons (“You are not the opinion of someone who doesn’t know you!”), synth-disco raves, acoustic ballads, explosions, video interviews with her cats, sparkle-intensive costume changes, a Weeknd duet and oh yeah, the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team parading through the crowd to “Style” in front of 60,000 screaming fans. That kind of night.

When Bruce Springsteen plays NYC, he likes to joke about how the city’s beloved hometown icons — Sinatra, the Statue of Liberty, the sports teams — are rooted in Jersey. There was an element of that when Swift kicked off with her new theme song “Welcome to New York,” explaining, “Although we’re in New Jersey, our story opens in New York.” But these songs aren’t really about any particular city any more than they’re about any particular boy — they all take place in the galaxy Taylor creates in her songs, one where everything orbits around one girl’s mood swings, where boys are disposable and cats are keepers, where girlfriends matter and lying about your feelings is not how things are done around here. (A handwritten sign taped to a door backstage: “Cats Roaming. Do Not Open.” Only on Planet Tay.) It was the kind of show that could only make emotional sense in a stadium this size.

As always, the hardcore fans were a crucial part of the spectacle, in full gear with their costumes and glowsticks. The crowd was, as Taylor said, “jumping and dancing and loud and lit up and dressed up.” There was a gang of girls with their birthdates bedazzled on their shirts a la the 1989 logo—2004, 2007, etc—while their moms proudly repped 1976. Two girls with matching lightboards, one saying WE’RE TOO BUSY DANCING and the other TO GET KNOCKED OFF OUR FEET. A couple of girls with homemade Mean Girls-style shirts announcing, “You Can’t Swift With Us.” The fan faves were probably the girls carrying giant Starbucks venti cups as big as they were, with the logo tweaked to STARBUCKS LOVERS and Taylor’s face in the middle. That’s how a Swift show works: You love the players and you love the game.

“We all have different insecurities, different fears, different scars,” Taylor announced. “There are many different types of people here tonight. But we have one thing in common: When we feel great amounts of joy or great amounts of pain, we turn to music, and that’s why we’re here tonight.” The show was a marathon—19 songs, stretching almost to midnight. The new songs, despite their studio sheen, really kick live—especially synth-pop epiphanies like “New Romantics” (where Taylor’s male harem of private dancers toted her around on a park bench) and “Blank Space.” She rocked a glow-in-the-dark polka-dot ensemble for “How You Get The Girl,” as her dancing boys twirled neon umbrellas and her band staged an extremely welcome twin-guitar duel. She picked up her trusty acoustic guitar for “Can’t Feel My Face” with the Weeknd, whose hair might have been the most truly 1989 thing in sight.

She radically revised the oldies, which did not stop anyone from singing them. “I Knew You Were Trouble” began with a slow creepy goth-industrial intro — loads of the Sisters of Mercy’s Andrew Eldritch in her vocals! Floodland, holla! — before the drums kicked in and turned it into a rock-me-Amadeus stomp. “Love Story” became a synth ballad, as she whisked around the stadium on her magic levitating catwalk. Even better was the hair-metal version of “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” which has never-ever-ever sounded this nasty–Taylor in leather at the lip of the stage, doing a perfect version of the Slash guitar slouch, shoulders hunched, hair falling over face. Who knows, maybe Tay will do an full-on Headbanger’s Ball album next time.

And because she’s Taylor, she talked the talk. You have never heard a pop star say “Let me clarify that statement” more times in one night. It got heavy, like when she confessed, “Real talk, Jersey: I haven’t always felt like I have real friends, or any friends at all.” She gave the crowd her list of friendship requirements (“You have to like me” and “you have to want to spend time with me,” with various codicils and subclauses). She also told us, “If I had my way, everything would be simple for all of you. I wish nobody would ever mess with your mind. I wish nobody would wait two days to text you back, when you know they had their phone with them the whole time!” That line got one of the biggest roars of the night.

But the hugest moment had to be “Style,” when she brought out the U.S. soccer team, just a few hours after their ticker-tape victory parade. They looked like they were having a blast, strutting down the catwalk, waving giant flags. (After the show they gave her a SWIFT #13 team jersey.) She also brought out Project Runway host Heidi Klum, who if memory serves is from one of the countries the U.S. team aufed in the tournament. (Let the healing begin!) Tay’s been preaching the girl-bonding gospel so long, it’s easy to take that part of her game for granted — but that’s just a measure of how much she’s changed the pop-star landscape. For “Bad Blood,” she struck a pose with video comrades Hailee Steinfeld, Lily Aldridge, Gigi Hadid and Lena Dunham — she shows off her girlfriend collection the way rock bands like Guns N Roses or Great White used to make videos where the girlfriends lounge around the soundstage.

(And speaking of Taylor girlfriends, a sincere question: have Haim always been this good? I wasn’t a fan going in but their opening set was fire, roughing up their pop hits and doing a fantastic version of “Oh Well,” by the Peter Green edition of Fleetwood Mac, which sounds sounds so snotty as a sullen-teen-girl anthem — “Don’t ask me what I think of you / I might not give the answer that you waaant me toooo.” Somewhere, Peter Green must be proud these black magic women have given this song a new life.)

As usual for a Swift show, the quiet moments were some of the most intense, especially “Clean,” “This Love” and the piano medley of “Enchanted” and “Wildest Dreams,” where she whipped out the piano-hair windmills. One of the highlights was “You Are In Love"—not just a deep cut, but a bonus track—where she led the whole crowd in a sing-along. Funny how all the state-of-the-art special effects can’t hold a glowstick to the visceral power of 60,000 fans singing about love pains.

It all ended with "Shake It Off,” with fireworks, confetti and dancing boys in purple Angus Young schoolboy outfits. All night, the Eighties concept took many different forms—from the pre-show mix tape (Human League, Toto, Fine Young Cannibals and my girl Tiffany) to the beats. But mostly, it’s in the way she embodies the Eighties ideal of a pop star — Madonna, Prince, Bruce — as an auteur who makes every album, every tour something new. Honestly, if Taylor Swift had just done the Red tour all over again, plugging in the new songs with some greatest hits, that would have been fine with absolutely everyone. Taking the easy way would have been 100 percent good enough. It just wasn’t what she wanted to do. Instead, she wanted to make a gloriously epic pop mess like this. What a night.

Set List:

1. “Welcome to New York”
2. “New Romantics”
3. “Blank Space”
4. “I Knew You Were Trouble”
5. “I Wish You Would”
6. “How You Get the Girl”
7. “I Know Places”
8. “All You Had to Do Was Stay”
9. “Can’t Feel My Face” with The Weeknd
10. “You Are in Love”
11. “Clean”
12. “Love Story”
13. “Style”
14. “This Love”
15. “Bad Blood”
16. “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”
17. “Enchanted”/“Wildest Dreams”
18. “Out of the Woods”
19. “Shake It Off”

Q&A of Matt & Karen at Comic con in Philadelphia [ June 21, 2014]

  • Matt and Karen dancing the drunk giraffe. Epic!
  • Karen took from the set the binoculars from the TARDIS and Matt took his suit and fez
  • What was it like working with David Tennant on the 50th Anniversary? Matt : “We were just kinda fanboyish, really." 
  • Karen’s favorite actors are Tilda Swinton - and everyone from F.R.I.E.N.D.S
  • Matt wanted a flight Manuel for the Tardis!
  • Karen Gillian says the word tardis in the most satisfying way.
  • matts impression of Karen first stepping into the tardis "drunken seal”
  • Q. What’s it like to run from statues? A. “Its really fun to run away from things, in general.” says Karen
  • matts icon is Karen 
  • matts mom has garden statues that scare him!
  • “If my Doctor had carried on I think he would have become meaner, tougher. Damn I should have stayed!”
  • Matt Smith: a castle is just a big fridge
  • “I wanna play Macbeth!” “I want to play lady Macbeth”. “Lets do it together!”
  • “I put on my eleventh doctor outfit when I’m sad about my life and look at pictures of peter capaldi”
  • “I was really influenced by an actress called Karen gillan.” -matt
  • Karen is bewildered by the moderator’s technology
  • Matt thinks his character would’ve become meaner, “the universe would’ve weighed on his shoulders”
  • “She’s a full Hollywood movie star”- matt
  • Matt keeps calling Karen “K face”
  • “She’s got a great singing voice!…but she can’t walk in a straight line”
  • If Matt Smith could play anything… “Something cool and villainous.”
  • Talking about filming their last scene; had to film it multiple times and it was “SO SAD”
  • Matt talking about the upcoming DW world tour “not that I’m bitter!”
  • Karen on Peter: “I’m hoping he swears all the time and they bleep it out with tardis sounds”
  • Peter Capaldi will bring his own reinvention to the role. It will be bold, says Matt
  • “I was the same age as Amy so I was like, I know what we wear! you don’t!” -Karen on her costumes
  • Matt talking about other versions of regeneration scenes; doesn’t want to offend people who worked on it
  • Matt wanted it to be more “troubling for him to go; he was in much more pain physically, but then he sees amy and it doesn’t matter”
  • “How many death reactions can one person come up with? Karen: "the multiple death reactions I’ve had to conjure up because RORY kept on DYING.”
  • “it was so nice having you there on my last day. just as a, thing.” -Matt to Karen
  • Karen says her mom is “one of the biggest whovians in this room right now!”
  • In England, you’re just born with knowledge of Daleks, say Matt and Karen
  • The mod just called Karen “Amy,” she says “I quite like it when people do that!”
  • Karen cringing at matt inadvertently calling her a hot chick
  • “Billie was my favorite companion”-Karen
  • Matt’s mom was the one who convinced him on doing the audition for the doctor.
  • There’s nothing more weird than a doll of yourself"-Karen More cool than weird though, says Matt
  • “call JJ Abrahams!”-matt
  • Matt liked his tweed suit best because it was uncool, which made it cool.
  • If Matt were Amy: “yes, I’m a kissogram!!" if Matt was Karen’s companion he would wear the kissogram outfit
  • "That’s the doctor!!” matt says, making an inside joke face at Karen
  • “It’s as fun to make as it is fun to watch,” says Matt
  • Matt’s worst experience on set was seeing Karen in makeup; “no, actually it was one of my favorite times!”
  • While filming TATM, Karen hung upside down for so long she burst the blood vessels in her face
  • “Doctor Who changed our whole life!”-Matt
  • “I think you look nice with short hair!”-Matt to Karen 
  • matt calling small children “dude”
  • Matt and Karen laughing about their shared bald experience 
  • Matt is still jokingly distraught about no longer being the doctor
  • Karen was dressed as Britney Spears at her concert in Vegas; someone yelled “OMG ITS AMY POND”
  • Goldberg came to Matt and Karen to tell them she’s a fan of the show.
  • Karen said nothing would get saved if she was the doctor
  • What character would you be? “I was gonna say Rory, but like, to be married to myself??”-Karen
  • “But run a bath as the Doctor would run a bath. Kids, ask your parents because you could have a flooding bill.”
  • What was it like filming in the US? “The best! We love coming over here!”
  • The little human things that confound the Doctor make you realize he’s an alien, says Matt Smith
  • A cappella rendition of the DW theme is happening on stage!
  • Riding a dinosaur is painful according to Matt.
  • Matt loves Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, old disney films
  • Karen doesn’t like football. She just likes football player stickers
  • Matt: my mum sold my disney movies! Karen: LYNNE!!
  • Karen collected football stickers as a child. Matt: “who are you?!”
  • Karen’s favorite doctor is Matt! Matt says good answer.
  • “I made a belt out of them (heat packs). I’d put them in my socks.”
  • “The eleventh hour ” is matt and karen favourite episode.
  • Karens favorite 90s show is FRIENDS and matts is men behaving badly
  • Karen strapped 7 heat packs to herself on set; “she’s massively selfish”-matt
  • Matt read a book on psychosis to get into character for American Psycho.
  • Amy and the Doctor: the time-traveling Mulder and Scully
  • Matt ate 20 fish fingers filming “The Eleventh Hour.”
  • I did eat fish fingers and custard, which I highly recommend to anyone under 10,“ Matt says
  • Matt loves the angels. Karen loves Silurians.

Thanks to the whole twitter who was at the con!