here you can see my attempt at coloring not going so well

Something happened 63 years ago that’s haunted me my entire life. I’ve never told anyone about it—until now

Story by reddit user  Sergeant_Darwin

It’s official: I’m an old man.

For the last couple years, I’ve comforted myself by saying I’m in my “early 70s,” but math is simple and unforgiving. Today is my 75th birthday, and God, the years do fly.

I’m not here for your well wishes; this is hardly a milestone I’m excited about. I’m glad to still be here, of course, but I find I have less and less to live for with every passing year. My bones ache, my kids live far away, and the other side of my bed has been empty for just over eight months now. In fact, once I cast my vote against that goddamned Trump this November, I may have nothing to live for at all.

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Cosplay, Fanart and Plagiarism

(gif curtesy to Mel)


TL;DR: An artist traced (!) my cosplay photo without permission, gave me zero credits, sold the prints at a con and denied she’s ever seen my photo.

First, both of us, the cosplayer and the photographer, want to say that it would never have come to this if the artist would have immediately apologized to us in person, instead of being extremely rude to us and letting things escalate. A simple sorry and taking down the prints would’ve sufficed.

In the beginning of January, being hyped with the new SU episodes, I immediately fell in love with Blue Diamond and cosplayed her. Two months ago, a friend let me know that an artist she saw drew a fanart based on my photo. I was extremely flattered and happy, but also kinda sad the artist gave me zero credits. Us cosplayers and photographers work really hard to get a nice result, and everyone is happy when their photo serves as an inspiration for another artwork. I wrote a letter to her stating that I love her art, but I’d like her to credit me as a source of inspiration (adding the screen shot).

For two months, there was silence. I tried it again a few weeks ago, but again, no response. Okay, what can you do…



Last weekend we had a big con in Germany with a huge artist alley and both of us, the photographer and the cosplayer, attended. Suddenly, a friend came to us and said that there’s a girl selling this exact drawing. We were puzzled and decided to go to her booth and look at it ourselves.

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Aliens Vs Menstrual

Re-posting this so folks actually see the damn thing.

Please forgive the length… the plot bunny got away from me… very far away from me…


There was blood on the floor.

Avrex blinked and stared at the red droplets on the floor. More red caught xer eye. There was more just under the edge of the seat. As if someone had tried to wipe it up but hadn’t thought to get under the very edge. Only one species on board had red blood.

This had to belong to one of the humans.

But why would blood be here in waste room of all places? Granted, humans were an odd breed, and used the waste rooms for more than the elimination of waste. Some even installed mirrors and extra lights and spent an hour or more in there! But blood? Why here? And why on the waste reclaimer lid? Surely if one of the humans was injured they would go to the infirmary….

…wouldn’t they?

Avrex shook xer scaled head and stalked out of the waste room. Xey would get to the bottom of this.


The humans had been hired three months prior. Two at first. Then another two a month later. And a fifth one a month after that. They were extremely useful, and didn’t really take up much space.

Hunting down any of said humans was a challenge.

Three of the humans were mechanics, and could be found shimmying their slender bodies between various components of the ship to reach the part they desired to work on. Even with an extra set of large eyes, Avrex would often walk right by the little beings, missing their little oil and grease smeared bodies in amongst the equally oil and grease smeared engine components. At a hulking ten feet tall, Avrex often missed the little monsters because they were under something or other.

The massive first officer dismissed the mechanics as a viable first target for questions. Searching through the entrails of the ship for crew members that xey may or may not find was not an effective use of xer energy or time. Xey could always catch the mechanics at the designated meal time if the other two humans couldn’t answer xer questions satisfactorily.

The fourth human was no easier to find. He was a security guard, and could be anywhere on the ship at any given time. Despite the fact that he wasn’t a mechanic, he seemed to share their proclivity for climbing on things, and for crawling into spaces that were inaccessible to most of the rest of the crew.

That left Carl.

Avrex made xer ponderous way down to the metallurgy lab. The human designated as Carl was not like the others. He was much older. The kind, gentle being had been the first human the ship had taken on, and had paved the way for the four other humans that followed. The others respected him greatly, turning to him for wisdom and advice. Surely Carl would have some insight into why there was human blood in the waste room.

Carl was right where he was supposed to be.

Avrex pressed the alert button and patiently waited to be granted entry just outside the lab doors. The request was swiftly answered, the doors sliding open with a soft hiss to admit the ship’s first officer.

Carl had put his work station into a safe position, and turned in his seat to give the hulking alien from Jarrok his full and undivided attention. Avrex had always liked that about Carl. While the human ability to multi-task often came in useful, it was sometimes disconcerting to hold a conversation with a being that never once even glanced in xer general direction while they spoke.

Carl smiled as he stripped of his protective gear. “Avrex. What brings you down here?”

The first officer assumed a parade rest position. “I have a query about human behavior, and had hoped that you could explain.”

The human chuckled and ran a hand through his graying hair. “Well, I’ll do my best. Go on and fire away.”

Avrex paused, then decided to ignore the odd turn of phrase. Experience had shown that large amounts of time were wasted when human parlance was questioned. “I discovered a small amount of blood in one of the communal waste rooms. I am aware that humans use waste rooms for more than their intended purpose, but I am at a loss as to what form of task could take place in a waste room, and possessed the potential to cause injury. The blood was red, thus it can be safely assumed that such belonged to one of the humans on board. But none of the humans have sought out medical aid. If one of my crew is injured in any capacity, as first officer I am entitled to know, so that I may account for such injuries when drawing up the duty roster for the coming cycles.”

The elderly male frowned thoughtfully. “There are a couple things it might be. But I’m not going to stir up panic by picking the wrong one. Which waste room was it you found the blood?”

Feeling dread curdle in xer gut, Avrex gave him the correct room number.

Carl nodded. “Melanie was supposed to be working up near that sector. More’n likely it’s her blood you found. Come on, I’ll walk up with you and help straighten this mess out.” Avrex started to protest. Surely xey could manage without taking Carl away from his work if given the pertinent information. The elderly human shook his head in seeming amusement. “Trust me Avrex, it’s better if I go along. If this is what I think it is, you’d just end up with a very angry or hurt mechanic on your hands.”

The first officer shut xer maw, frilled ears pinned back against the sides of xer head. What could possibly be going on that would result in a human being injured or angry?

Xey walked back down to the correct deck with Carl, deciding to wait and see. If what Xey had heard from other ships was true, an angry human was something to be avoided if at all possible.


Despite the consistent trouble the rest of the crew had in locating the mechanics while about their work in the engines, Carl seemed to have no problem tracking down the correct human.

At his call, she crawled out of a space so tight Avrex wasn’t sure xey could’ve gotten a paw in.

The second human the ship had taken on, Melanie had been hired barely a week after Carl. She was by far the smallest of the humans, and the quietest. Her peers took shameless advantage of her small size, leaving work in the tightest spaces to her. She didn’t seem to mind, preferring to work alone rather than with her group as most humans were purported to do. In fact, with the exception of Carl she seemed to avoid all of her kind for the most part.

The raven haired female flashed her teeth in the odd threat gesture that humans insisted denoted welcome, amusement, or joy.

Melanie wiped her hand on a rag and stuck it out to Carl for a traditional human greeting. “Hey Carl. Did one of your do-dads break down again?”

“Not this time dear.” Carl assured. “The first officer swung by with a question, and it seemed you’d be most likely to have the answer. Seems Avrex swung by the restroom and found human blood on the floor. Any chance you’d know something about that?”

Melanie paled.

The elder human nodded and patted her shoulder, seeming to have derived his answer from her silence. “It’s alright dear, no need to worry. I was married for thirty-five years before cancer took my sweet Belle, and she and I raised six beautiful daughters. There isn’t a thing under the sun I haven’t seen, and I’ve made more trips to the store for feminine things than I could probably count! Do you need any help, or do you have everything in order?”

The young female slowly relaxed at his kindly manner. She shook her head, asserting that she had ‘it’ covered. Avrex shifted xer weight, subtly drawing the humans’ attention back to xer question.

“You’re the only woman on board, Mel. Would you like to explain? Or would you rather I did?”

Melanie’s cheeks started to change color underneath the grease. “I can do it.”

Carl seemed pleased by the answer. “Go get ‘em then. And if you need anything, you go ahead and ask me or Cal. That’s the lad over in security, in case you didn’t know. Lord knows he’s young, but he won’t give you any grief if you need something and can’t get it yourself.”

Calling a farewell, Carl patted Avrex on the shoulder and headed back to his lab, leaving the massive reptilian being towering over the tiny female.

Avrex slowly squatted down as low as xey could manage in an attempt to put her at ease. Xer experience with humans was still somewhat limited, but observation had shown that humans tended to be slightly intimidated by a difference in height.

Her cheeks were changing color again. Looking down, the human female mumbled something at the floor.

Avrex cocked xer head. “Could you repeat that more clearly please?”

Melanie seemed to gather her courage and finally looked the massive officer in the larger pair of xer four amber colored eyes.

“I’m on my period.” The admission made, she seemed to lose some of her discomfort. “It started a few hours ago while I was up in the machinery. I had to climb down and run to the rest roo-damnit, waste room to clean myself up. I’m sorry about the blood, I’ll be more careful in future.”

Avrex cocked xer head. “I do not understand. I was under the impression that ‘period’ is a form of punctuation denoting the end of a sentence. How then, can you be ‘on’ it?”

She stared at xem for a long moment, eyes widening as she slowly seemed to realize that xey genuinely had no idea what she was talking about. “Ok. Um… the word ‘period’ also means a length of time. Human females use the word as slang to talk about a specific time. It’s… God, I can’t believe I’m giving an alien the talk. Ok, so basically…”

Avrex listened in growing astonishment as the little female described a process by which one of her internal organs partially deconstructed itself once a month unless she put it to use in forming a baby. If she was to be believed, it happened once a month from approximately age eleven to age forty to fifty. Admittedly, compared to the amount of blood in the human body the amount lost during one of the episodes she described was relatively small. But, she explained that other fluids were expelled as well, along with pieces of the organ that was shredding and rebuilding itself. The entire process took place approximately every three to four weeks.

Avrex shook xer head. “Shouldn’t such a process be painful?”

Melanie shrugged. “Well yeah. I know some women who stay in bed the entire time they’re on because it hurts so bad.”

The first officer reared back in alarm. “Are you in pain?!”

Another shrug. “My uterus is shredding it’s inner lining because I’m not knocked up with a baby. Yes, I hurt.”

Avrex had to work hard not to snap xer teeth in xer anger on Melanie’s behalf. “If human females require bed-rest while experiencing one of these ‘periods’, why are you not in bed? Surely if you explained the situation to the medical officer he would have given you medical leave. We do not require a crew member to return to active duty immediately after surgery, surely an internal organ coming apart cannot be so different!”

Melanie laughed. Laughed!

The little human caught xer hand and gave it a squeeze. “I said some humans Avrex. Some. Most don’t experience severe pain. If it gets bad, it means that more than likely something else is wrong. Most of us wear special liners in our clothes or inserted into our bodies to catch the blood so we don’t get it all over the place. And we just go on with our daily routine. Grin and bear it. We’ll be alright.”

The first officer wasn’t convinced. “At least tell me that you have spoken to the medical officer about something to relieve the pain.”

She shook her head, holding up a hand to forestall xer protests. “Some women do. I don’t like using pain medication for something I can tough out. Humans have this thing, where we can slowly build up an immunity to certain drugs through prolonged use. I avoid pain medication so I don’t build up an immunity. That way, when I do need it I know it works really well. As soon as I realize my period is starting, I start drinking more water. The human body is about sixty percent water, and making sure that I’m properly hydrated speeds up the process and makes it hurt less. Instead of dealing with it for six to seven days, it only lasts three to four. Seriously Avrex, I’m fine, and I’ve got a handle on the rest of the symptoms. There’s nothing to worry about.”

Avrex felt as if xer head was spinning. “Other symptoms?”

The human bared her teeth in another smile. “Most of us get moody because our hormone level fluctuate a bit. It hits every woman a bit differently. Some women turn into a weepy mess. Me? I turn into a grouchy, irritable, cow who avoids everyone like the plague. Other women will get angry at the drop of a hat and bite the head off the nearest individual that annoys her.” She must’ve seen the look of shock and horror on xer face because she immediately backtracked. “Shit, not literally! I mean they just get overly aggressive, usually verbally.”

She waited for a second, to make sure xey understood, then went on.

“Aside from the moodiness it’s a grab bag of ways your period will affect you. Some people get cravings, some people get back pain, or their breasts”, she put her hands illustratively on the soft mounds on her chest to be sure that there wasn’t any miscommunication between them about what ‘breasts’ were, “get sore. Most of us get cramps in our lower abdomens right about here.” Again the illustrative touch, this time to a spot just below her belt. “Some of us have an increased sex drive, while others just want to roll themselves up in a blanket like a burrito, and a lot of us are fatigued. Every woman’s different.”

Avrex slowly shook xer head, completely dumbfounded by the sudden influx of information. “Is…is there anything you currently require? I know that Carl already asked, and you informed him that you were sufficiently prepared, but…”

Her face softened. “I’m fine Avrex. Really. I just…”

“Hey! Melanie! You gonna keep up with the men today, or are you gonna have a tea party with the dinosaur all day?”

Avrex almost responded.

Almost.

Instead, xey remained stationary, watching as a strange change came over the female before xem. Where before she had been timid and shy, at the sudden derogatory call from the newest of the five humans, a male named Dave, her face suddenly became calm and smooth as granite.

She slowly turned and cast a threatening, and yes Avrex was sure that this smile was definitely a threat, at Dave and the other male mechanic Josh. Josh had been the fourth human taken on, hired within days of Cal the security guard.

As Dave was the one who’d spoken, Melanie seemed to focus most of her attention on him. “Care to run that by me again smart mouth?”

Josh, older and more mature than Dave, seemed to understand the unspoken warning. “Dave…”

The younger human ignored him. “Ooh, someone woke up on the bitchy side of the bed this morning. What’s a matter sweet cheeks?” He made an expression that Avrex would later learn was called a leer. The male grabbed her by the arm. “Maybe you just need a little action to settle you down, yeah? How ‘bout it babe? I bet I can get that stick out of your ass. Hm? Maybe put something better…”

A large wrench whistled through the air and stopped within a micron’s breadth of the young human’s nose. It was easily the length of the male’s forearm, and had previously been occupying a loop on Melanie’s belt. He stared at it, cross eyed and pale, then looked at the diminutive little female who could’ve easily broken his nose if she’d had less control.

“What’s a matter?” She parroted the question back, voice tight and dark. “What’s a matter is that I started my day in a fountain of my own blood, and that’s how you’re going to end yours if you ever call me ‘sweet cheeks’, ‘babe’, or any other cutesy nickname again. And as for keeping up with you ‘men’, I’m already three days ahead of schedule. You’ve barely been on this ship a month and you’re already two weeks behind. So I’d say it’s you who aught to be keeping up with me, because it seems anything you can do I can do better and faster while bleeding.” Her dark eyes narrowed. “And lastly? If you ever lay hands on me again? I promise you, they will never find your body.”

She slid the wrench back into her belt, cast a respectful nod to Avrex, and calmly crawled back up into the machinery.

Dave stared after her for a long moment, then pointed. “Josh! Did you see what that bitch just…”

The older male cuffed him over the back of the head. “You’re an idiot. Never piss off something that bleeds for seven days a month and doesn’t die. I haven’t got to know her all that well yet, but Mel is worth ten of you. That woman works her ass off. If you ever go after her again, and she doesn’t kill you, you can bet that I will happily beat you black and blue!”

Avrex bared xer teeth, allowing a tiny warning growl to rumble deep inside xer barrel chest. The reptilian first officer slowly stood to xer full ten foot height, looming over the miscreant. “Consider yourself warned.”


An additional talk with Carl yielded a few ‘pearls of wisdom’ concerning ‘feminine’ needs.

With the thunderstruck captain’s blessing, Avrex ordered small metal receptacles installed in each of the public waste rooms on board at their next stop. Carl had suggested small boxes, but given the frequency of meteor showers and pirate attacks, evasive maneuvers were engaged fairly often. Avrex thought it better to have the receptacles affixed to the wall and a basic bolt lock placed on the lid so that the ‘feminine’ supplies wouldn’t be thrown around the waste rooms when the ship had to duck or roll suddenly.

Upon having the situation explained, the other alien members of the crew who hadn’t been released for shore leave were more than happy to help. They liked Melanie, and the discovery that she spent a week in pain each month and gave no outward sign was disconcerting to say the least.

Other changes included stain proof bedding, a heating pad, a new fluffy blanket, and a few earth sweets being slipped into her room.


Dave, the human who had harassed her, was not invited back to the ship.

Instead he was replaced with a male creylight from the Andromeda system. While not as small as the humans, he was still flexible enough to reach most of the components without taking a piece of the engine apart, and he was much stronger. The humans wouldn’t have to drag the lifting equipment out as often.

He was also made aware of how his predecessor had been fired for his disrespectful, inappropriate, and frankly downright threatening behavior towards Melanie.

The crew was not going to tolerate such treatment towards their favorite human.


Melanie nearly burst xer ear drums with her grateful calls upon returning from shore leave and discovering what xey had done.

She had been dreading coming back to work and having to deal with Dave. And then to find out he’d been fired, and to see what ‘sweethearts’ the rest of the crew had been…

As xey crouched down to receive the strongest ‘hug’ the little human could muster, Avrex couldn’t help but marvel at the change in her attitude. While she still treated Josh a little coolly, Melanie seemed much less guarded than she had before. She made friends with Cal, and Carl, and slowly started to get to know Josh. She was more outgoing while socializing with the rest of the crew. The timidity faded, an air of preparedness that the crew hadn’t even realized was there fell away. Leaving her relaxed and free. For the first time since she’d boarded the ship, she seemed truly happy.

She felt safe.

And Avrex couldn’t help but feel both saddened and enraged at how surprised she seemed that they would go out of their way to make her feel safe and comfortable. That she was so used to relying on no one but herself. So used to being stepped on and living in fear of the male half of her species taking advantage of her.

No more.

Avrex took care of xer crew.

Body Heat

Request: Can you write a Sirius Black x Reader but the reader is James’ sister and Sirius tries to flirt with the reader and James is all like are you flirting with my sister and Sirius fires back or something?
Warning(s): Bar scenes, drinking, swearing, intense hugging(?), major Sirius feels. Honestly, just look at the title.
Note: This is my first Marauders’ imagine, so feedback is appreciated.

⇢  A Sirius Black x Reader work where the reader is James’ younger twin sister.


Most brothers preferred to keep their social life separate from their siblings’. James Potter was no exception. Which is why, when Lily and Marlene urged you to meet the Marauders at the bar with them, you fervently declined.

“A bar? Filled to the brim with drunkards? James would never let me out of his sight,” you argued, moving away as Marlene approached you with a tube of lipstick. “I’m not going.”

She crossed her arms, her lower lip jutting out. “Please, Y/N.” Marlene gestured at your attire: Black hot pants and a long sleeved crop top. “You’re already dressed for it.”

You glared down at your outfit, tugging at the hem of your shorts. “I didn’t know you guys chose clothes for me to wear to a bar.”

“What did you think? Your arse is hanging out for tea with the Minister of Magic?”

Lily gave Marlene a warning look as you flushed a bright red. “Don’t listen to her, Y/N. Your arse is not hanging out.” She paused, giving you a once over. “Well…You’ll blend in, at least.”

You groaned, pinching the bridge of your nose. “James is going to kill me.”

“So what?” Marlene interjected. “He’s your brother, not your dad. Who cares what he thinks?”

I do; he’s my brother.”

A slight snort came out from Lily. “Marlene is right. You’re your own woman. You shouldn’t let the opinion of that arrogant toerag dictate your decisions.”

You and Marlene exchange glances. It was quite obvious that, over the years, James’ crush was becoming less unrequited. And although it was disturbing at first, you quickly accepted the idea that one of your best friends fancied your brother.

“You mean that arrogant toerag you so happen to like?” you said, raising an eyebrow. 

Lily raised hers back defiantly. “I don’t like James Potter.”

“Yeah, right,” Marlene scoffed. “That’s like saying Y/N doesn’t have the hots Sirius Black.”

You frowned, ignoring the slight amount of heat rising to your cheeks. “But I don’t.”

Now it was Lily and Marlene who gave each other incredulous looks. It was clear neither of them believed your poorly concealed lie. They knew, no matter how much you denied it, that you had developed a crush on Sirius the moment he gave you a bundle of white flowers for Christmas. Just the thought of his hand brushing against your cheek as he tucked a single flower behind your ear made your butterflies come alive.

“Let’s pretend, for now, that we believe you.” Marlene checked the time. “But in this moment, I hear the firewhisky calling my name. Are you coming?”

“Sirius will be there,” Lily sang.

You threw your head back defeat. “Fine.” You paused. “But not because I want to see Sirius.”

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⇁ nudes, not flowers | 01

Originally posted by bangtannoonas

pairing⇀Hoseok x reader x Jungkook

genre⇀smut || fuckboi!au

warnings⇀public sex, slight voyeurism/exhibitionism, dirty talk, dom!junghope, demeaning names during sex if you aren’t into that, jealousy

word count⇀5.5k

You’re not supposed to fall for Jung Hoseok and his repertoire of awful pick-up lines—but you do. The problem is: he’s afraid of commitment, and bolts at the idea of settling down. After that, you decide to stay far away from fuckboys, but his friend decides to test your new found resolutions.

or : Jungkook wants to see how far he can push Hoseok until he snaps 

⇁  01 | 02

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anonymous asked:

I know you probably have a lot of requests with the gods and monsters - but would you ever do an Ares based one?

Zeus’s mistress Io remains in her form of a cow, guarded by Hera’s servant Argus, and Hera is content.

She will remain in that form until her death. Hera hopes that lying with her husband was worth the sacrifice.

Zeus won’t speak to her, unwilling to admit the cow is actually his lover and ensure her death, and equally unwilling to stand against his wife to try and rescue her. Hera has him just where she wants him, and it can’t last, it never does, but she intends to enjoy it while it does.  

Then Artemis comes to her, gold and fierce. She never flinches away from her queen, staring her in the face as if she is nothing more than another of her huntresses. If Hera did not hate her for being her husband’s daughter, she thinks she might actually like the girl. “Io has a destiny,” she says, “you must let her go.”

“I don’t care for her destiny,” Hera says idly, “especially when that destiny involves getting with my husband’s child.”

“She is to give birth to a new line of kings,” Artemis hisses, “to be the wife of a death god, to be mother goddess of a whole new people. She is not meant for us. You must let her go.”

“I am Hera,” she says, “I am Queen. I must do nothing.”

Artemis growls, hand twitching for her bow, but Hera only raises an eyebrow. Let the girl try. There are few that can stand against her, and the huntress is not among them. Artemis lets out a low breath and says, “Do it, my queen, and I will grant you what it is you most desire.”

“Some peace and quiet?” Hera asks.

“A child,” she answers. “Let Io go, let her fulfill her destiny as a goddess of the Black Land of the Nile. If you do that, I, the patron goddess of childbirth, will personally use every ounce of power I possess to ensure you conceive and deliver a child of Zeus.”

Hera’s eyes narrow, “Neither my power nor his has ever been able to achieve this. What makes you think you are any different?”

“We all have our domains,” she says, “just as you cannot command the sea, just as your husband has no power over the art of weaving, so can I ensure a healthy child when you could not.”

She taps her fingers against her throne. They call her a mother goddess, though she’s raised no children. Hephaestus may be her precious son, but he doesn’t know that it was not her that threw him from Olympus. Very few people know that. And she didn’t raise him regardless, that honor belongs to Hecate.

A child, of her and Zeus. A child she can raise.

“I accept,” she announces. “You may take her, and Zeus may fulfill her destiny.” She leans forward, brings the oppressive weight of her power to the fore and lowers the pressure of the air until Artemis is left shivering. “Know this, Patron Goddess of Childbirth. If Io births a son of Zeus before I do, I will travel to the Black Land of the Nile and slay her and her children with my own two hands. Not even Hades will be able to put her back together again.”

“Yes, my Queen,” Artemis says, unable to keep her teeth from chattering.

~

Hera is true to her word. She allows Hermes to think he’s tricked Argus and to steal Io away. She pretends to be outraged at the audacity, at the pure white cow traveling to the sands of the Nile.

Artemis is true to her word. Hera lies with Zeus, like she has so many times before, and a child grows inside of her. One day she stands before her husband and brings his hand to the swell of her stomach, “This is your child.”

Something almost like happiness steals across his face. She forgets, sometimes, that they hate each other only as much as they love each other. After so much time together, many would think it would be one or the other. They simply opted for both.

Artemis is there during the birth, her easy confidence more comforting then Hera will ever admit. Delivering Hephaestus was easy compared to this. She screams and cries and Hestia’s hands on her shoulders are all that keeps her from collapsing and begging someone to just cut the child from her. She doesn’t think she can die in childbirth, not with Artemis between her legs. She wishes she’d thought to ask before this began.

But she does not die. Her son is born, just as healthy and beautiful as Hephaestus was. “Well done,” Artemis says softly, placing the squirming child into her arms.

Zeus touches her hair and kisses his son’s forehead. “We shall call him Ares.”

“Very well,” she agrees, so tired her eyes struggle to stay open.

She hands her son to Hestia, and finally allows sleep to take her.

~

Ares grows into the spitting image of his father. Same copper-red skin, same silky black hair. Her husband keeps it short, but her son lets his grow long. The minutes Hera spends every morning brushing his hair are among her favorite.

He has an eager smile and a soft heart. Hera doesn’t know where he got it, since it’s certainly not from her or Zeus. Demeter tolerates his bumbling after her, though any time Kore attempts to meet her cousin Demeter’s temper frays. Poseidon allows Ares to explore the depths of the sea with a minor sea god acting as his guide. Apollo plays for him, and Artemis teaches him to hunt. Zeus’s lightning doesn’t burn his son, and when storms rage he takes Ares to the top of Olympus and teaches him to throw lightning bolts.

Hera selfishly does not allow Ares to go to the underworld. She knows he would be safe there, that Hades would protect him as he protected Hephaestus, but that’s precisely why she won’t allow it. They got to raise one of her sons already. It pains her to share Ares with them now.

He is happy, and kind, kinder than anyone would expect a child of her womb to be.

“He must choose a domain,” Zeus rumbles, watching Ares shoot arrows with perfect accuracy.

“He is a child still,” Hera says, “let him remain so for a little longer.”

“If he does not choose a domain,” Zeus warns, “one will choose him. We are gods. We must be gods of something.”

She flickers her gaze at him, and he scoots an inch away from her. “He is a child, and for now a child he will remain. We are not Demeter. We shall not thrust the responsibilities and power of a deity on a child who is not prepared for it.”

Zeus disapproves, but says nothing more.

Her son will be the god of something patient, something soft. The god of lost children, of heartbroken suitors, of forgiveness. Something where his gentle heart will aid him instead of hurt him.

She traded her happiness for power. She doesn’t regret it. But Ares doesn’t need to do the same – she’s the most powerful goddess that still walks the earth. He’s her son, and he’ll want for nothing she can provide.

~

Ares is almost fully grown, long hair reaching his hips even braided, and the strength of his limbs is such that he can keep up with Artemis on her most vigorous of hunts, that he can throw his father’s lightning bolts halfway across the world.

He’s been to every place, and met every god of the earth, sea, and sky.

Except for one.

 It’s not hard to find the volcano. He’s strong enough and old enough to take care of himself, and his mother does not worry when he says he’s going to the earth. But he did not tell her where, precisely, on the earth he was going.

He has strong legs.  It’s easy for him to climb to the top of the volcano. He’s almost made it there when something grabs his shoulders, stilling him. He turns, and stares into a single large eye. “What are you doing?” the cyclopes growls.

“I’m looking for Hephaestus,” he says, “He’s my brother.”

“My master has many brothers,” the cyclopes says.

Ares shakes his head. He is not the product of his father’s fling with a sprite or mortal. “I am Ares, son of Zeus and Hera. Just as Hephaestus is. I came here to meet my brother.” The cyclopes hesitates. He asks, “What’s your name?”

“Brontes,” he answers, surprised.

“Brontes,” he smiles, “I just want to meet him. I’ve never met him before. I won’t linger.”

There’s a moment where Brontes looks conflicted, and Ares tries to look as unassuming as possible. “Fine,” he huffs, “but don’t get angry at me if he dips you in lava.”

“That would be fun,” he says brightly. Lightning doesn’t burn him. So far the only thing hot enough to cause him pain is Hestia’s fire. He probably could go swimming in lava.

Brontes looks at him as if he’s slightly unhinged. He just keeps smiling.

~

There are more cyclopes underneath, and bright glittering machines that Ares can’t even begin to wrap his mind around. “Who are you?” someone demands, and a hand grabs his wrist and yanks him away from a boiling vat of lava that he’d been peering into.

He looks up at a man taller and broader than he is. He has skin almost as dark as the obsidian of his volcano, but lighter eyes. They are the color of dark amber, of molasses. “We have the same eyes,” he says happily.

Hephaestus releases him instantly. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Why not?” he asks, “The mortals talk of you. No one else will. But you’re my brother, right?”

“You shouldn’t be here,” he repeats, “Does Zeus know where you are?”

He shrugs, taking a step closer. His brother takes a step back. He wonders if he’ll have to treat Hephaestus like a spooked horse.  “Father doesn’t keep track of where I am. Mom know I’m on earth.” Hephaestus flinches, small enough that he almost doesn’t notice. “We have her eyes, you know.”

He can’t stop starring at Hephaestus’s skin. They do not work like mortals – Demeter, Hestia, Zeus, and Hera are all different shades despite coming from the same parents. But – Ares looks so much like his father. Kore looks like Demeter. Yet Hephaestus looks nothing like their father. He can see their mother in him, in the eyes and shape of his jaw, even in how angry he is right now. He looks like Hera does when she’s about to lose her temper, lips pressed into a thin line and the careful stillness of his shoulders.

“I wasn’t trying to make you angry,” he says plaintively, “I only wanted to say hello.”

Unlike their mother, Hephaestus lets out a deep breath and seemingly all of his anger along with it. “I’ve been avoiding you.”

“Why? You don’t even know me.”

Hephaestus kicks him lightly in the shin, the pretty gold and copper of his metal legs catching his eye. “You have legs, and I do not. Hera did not throw you from Mount Olympus as she threw me.”

Ares looks hard at his brother’s face. The stories say his mother threw her son away for being ugly, but he seems just as handsome as any other god Ares has seen. His features are strong and chiseled, and he supposes that could have looked unattractive on a baby, but –

– his mother loves him. Hera loves him with a ferocity only matched by her temper, she loves him at his most mischievous and irritable, loves him when a stray thunderbolt sets Demeter’s hair on end, loves him when even Artemis and Apollo have grown tired of his antics, loves him when Athena can tolerate no more of his questions. He is her son, and so her love comes without conditions.

He doesn’t think Hera would have loved his brother any less just because of how he looked.

He also knows that if he tries to say that, it’s likely Hephaestus will push him into a lava pit.

“Well, that’s not my fault,” he says, “If you don’t want us to be brothers, can’t we at least be friends?”

Hephaestus’s face softens. He looks like their mother then too.  He crosses his arms, “You can’t tell your parents.”

Our parents, he thinks but doesn’t say. “Obviously. Where did you get so many cyclopes?”

The last remnants of his brother’s stern façade shatters as he throws back his head and laughs.

~

Ares is very near maturity, more adult than child, and his father constantly pressures him to choose a domain. He usually quiets with one sharp glance from his wife, but the fact remains that it is time for Ares to take his place among the gods of the pantheon, to have temples in his name and worshipers like a proper deity.

He doesn’t really want any of that.  He wants to continue hunting with Artemis, learning with Athena, building with Hephaestus.

His brother lets him help out in his workshop sometimes, if he’s very careful and does exactly as he’s told. Otherwise he sits on a table, legs swinging, and watches his brother work and tells him about what he does in the time in-between visits. He talks about their mother enough that Hephaestus doesn’t flinch at her every mention, which Ares can only consider an improvement. Sometimes Brontes will stand beside him and they’ll eat sweet buns together.

Unfortunately, all things, good and bad, must come to an end.

~

There are two giants, Otus and Ephialtes, who grow tired of hearing of the golden boy of Olympus, who grow jealous of his kindness and his beauty.

These two giants sneak onto Mount Olympus in the middle of the night, sneak into Ares’s room, and kidnap him. They’re not stupid enough to attempt to kill him. Instead, they stuff him into an urn, and seal him inside. Ares rages and fights, uses every trick he can think of to break out his prison, but none of them work.

Stuck at the bottom of the urn and seething, he can’t help but think that if he’d listened to his father and chosen a dominion he might be strong enough to free himself. But he didn’t, so he can’t, and instead he waits.

And waits.

And waits.

Days turn to weeks turn to months. He knows they’re looking for him. He knows his mother will tear apart the whole universe attempting to find him if nothing else. But – what if they can’t? What if he’s stuck in this urn for the rest of eternity?

In his darkest moments, his sorrow turns to rage. He is a god, son of Hera and Zeus, how dare they do this to him?

Then, one day, the urn opens.

Hermes peers down into it, then his face splits into a grin. “We’ve been looking for you!” He reaches down and hauls Ares out, and for a moment all he can do is blink at the glaring sun. Then his vision clears, and he sees they’re in the midst of a battle. The giants are fighting against the gods, against his parents, against the twins, against his brother. It’s bloody carnage, but – he can’t help but feel touched that all these people came looking for him. “Almost everyone offered to help find you,” he says, “but Hera didn’t want to draw too much attention to ourselves trying to sneak into their territory.”

No sooner has Hermes finished speaking than a giant barrels into his mother with sickening snap. Her shoulder slopes at a grotesque angle, but it hardly even slows her down.

“I have to help,” he says, a desperate urgency filling him. They came to help him, and now they’re getting hurt. That’s never something he’d wanted.

“Ares, wait!” Hermes calls out as he goes hurtling toward the battle. He doesn’t wait. Fighting on the ground can only do so much good, they’re strong but they’re outnumbered one hundred to one. He darts to Artemis, twisting around the bodies she’s throwing over her shoulder. “I need your bow!”

“Ares!” she says joyously, then, “What?”

“Trust me,” he says, “give me your bow.” A giant comes running towards them. Artemis flips him over her shoulder while continuing to stare at him in confusion. He’d be impressed if he wasn’t so worried. “Artemis, please!”

She hands over her bow. She moves to give him her quiver of arrows as well, but he’s already moving away from her. Next it’s to his father, who’s hurtling lightning bolts towards the swarm of giants crowding him. They’re deadly, but only so effective at close-range. He grabs a sizzling lightning bolt right from Zeus’s hand, the only being on the planet who could do that and survive, and keeps running. “Get clear!” he calls out over his shoulder. “Everyone move!”

He runs up past Hermes, needing to get to high ground for this to work. “Get everyone off the battlefield,” he says to Hermes. “Now.”

Hermes pulls a face, but by the time he makes it to the top of the mountain, the gods have shaken off most of the giants, are far enough away that he doesn’t have to worry.

He can do this. He’s Ares, the son of Hera and Zeus. He’s been trained in archery by the great huntress herself. He breaths in, and strings his father’s lightning bolt like an arrow. He pulls it back, breaths out, and lets the lightning bolt fly.

It lands in the middle of the battlefield full of confused giants. With a great clap of thunder and a burst of light, they’re all gone.

All that remains of the traitorous giants is a crater.

The gods are approaching him, his mother at a limping gait that makes his chest ache. Zeus gets to him first, grin stretched wide as he grabs him by both his shoulders. “My boy! That was magnificent!”

“Thanks,” he says. The smell of charred flesh is in the air, and it makes his stomach roll.

They kidnapped him. They stuffed him in an urn for over a year. They hurt his mom.

That doesn’t mean he enjoyed it. He never wants to do anything like that ever again.

“This was destiny,” his father says enthusiastically, and Ares has no idea what he’s talking about. “This is what you’re meant to do, son.”

He stares. He hopes it’s not.

The other gods are still at the bottom of the mountain. Artemis and Apollo each have one of his mother’s arms slung over their shoulders and are helping her up the mountain. Hermes and Hephaestus aren’t far behind.

He’s never seen his father look so proud of him. There’s a leaden pit in his stomach he can’t explain.

“In honor of my son’s great feat,” Zeus booms, his voice carrying across air, speaking with the voice of the king of the gods so his words become law, so they spread to every corner of the world, “I declare him Ares, God of War.”

Ares can’t breathe.

This isn’t what he wanted.


gods and monsters series, part xvii

read more of the gods and monsters series here

BTS Reactions | You Fall Asleep On Him

A/N: Requests open.

MASTERLISTS

Jin

Originally posted by jjilljj


You were extremely tired by the time Jin and you got to the dorm. You didn’t want to ruin date night though. Jin had planned a nice dinner and then coming home to snuggle and watch a movie. “Go change and I’ll put the movie selection on” he smiled before he grabbed the remote. You grabbed your purse where you somehow managed to fit a tee and shorts. You got dressed and quickly splashed your face with water, hoping to wake up a little. When you walked out, Jin was already in sweats and a tee, waiting for you to chose a movie to watch. 

Halfway through the movie though, your eyes felt heavy and you struggled to stay awake. Finally, you fell asleep, with your head resting on his chest. He didn’t seem to notice until you moved to get in a more comfortable position, with one arm wrapped around him. He couldn’t be upset, you looked so peaceful that he didn’t even want to carry you to bed. He smiled down at you, his heart fluttering. He couldn’t deny that he loved to see you to peaceful. He wanted to fall asleep with you and wake up with you at his side for the rest of his life.


Yoongi

Originally posted by sugagifs


You were with your one and only best friend, Yoongi, because he somehow managed to convince you to go with him to find some type of inspiration for the upcoming album. Hours passed and Yoongi still had energy to go to the festival in town. You had been following him from coffee shops to parks all day but he couldn’t seem to find the inspiration he needed. Yoongi watched couples walk up and down the pier and kids run down to follow the colorful lights. “Lets go on the Ferris wheel, I’ll see more from up there” he insisted. You smiled and nodded, giggling when Yoongi took your hand and ran to the contraption with much glee. Your eyes felt heavy but you didn’t want to get in the way of his mission to find inspiration. 

Once on the Ferris wheel, you let your head rest on his arm. He didn’t mind because he figured you were cold. When you reached the top of the wheel, Yoongi looked around at the lit up booths and crowds of people and looked at you to show you. He saw you soundly asleep, one hand wrapped around his wrist and he realized that his inspiration had been beside him all along, you.

J-Hope

Originally posted by nnochu


Remind me why I was dragged along” you groaned from the backseat of the car. J-Hope, Yoongi, Jimin and Tae had decided to drag you along to karaoke night. “Noona, stop complaining” Tae groaned back while he looked out the passenger window, probably searching for the bar Yoongi was driving to. 

After a long night of shots and slurred lyrics, Jimin was driving home, since he chose to not drink that night. You were still singing words to a random song in the backseat, with one arm around your best friend, Hobi. “Am I a good singer?” you asked him with a wide smile. “No” he laughed and you pretended to be offended. “HOBI, don’t be rude” you fake gasped and held a hand to your heart. “Shut up y/n” Yoongi muttered from beside you. You turned and gave him a scowl before you scooted closer to Hobi and laid your head on his shoulder. He thought you were upset with the other boy so he let you. As the car came to a stop, he looked down to see you sleeping with a small smile on your lips. A smile came to rest  on his face as well when he realized he wouldn’t mind falling asleep beside you for the rest of his life. 


Namjoon

Originally posted by chimcheroo


Namjoon had recently discovered your newfound fear of the dark and he was hell bent on getting you over it. “y/n, have a sleep over with me, you’ll get over it in no time” he insisted. “fine” you huffed out and grabbed a gym bag and filled it with clothes and your hair brush and toothbrush. You locked your apartment door behind you and followed him out. The entire night, Namjoon tried to test your limits, slowly but you were getting tired. He was a ball of energy and you were lacking 4 hours of sleep from the night before. “Can we take a break and watch TV Joonie?” you asked and sat down on his bed. He sighed in defeat, “Okay, 30 minutes” he said and sat down against the headboard, next to you. 

Your eyes slowly fell shut to the sound of Namjoon’s gentle breaths. You shifted in your sleep and Namjoon saw you had fallen sleep. He couldn’t help but chuckle before he wrapped an arm around you and laid you down to be more comfortable. “You don’t know what you do to me, do you, y/n?” he whispered to himself and kissed your temple before he fell asleep beside you. 


Jimin

Originally posted by senpai-sisters


“I’m going to sleep Jimin, I can’t stand another minute awake” you muttered. You and Jimin had agreed to stay up and wait for the album release of your favorite band. “Nooo y/n, just 3 minutes left!” he whined and shook your shoulder lightly, in an attempt to keep you awake. “It’s not my fault you forgot to buy coffee Jimin, I’m a weakling, I cant stay awake” you groaned and let your eyes fall shut.

 Jimin hadn’t noticed, he was so engrossed with the phone screen that he didn’t see you close your eyes. “ITS OUT Y/N, ITS OUT” he cheered but fell silent at your lack of reaction. “I swear you’re just like Yoongi” he chuckled and covered you with his blanket before he brushed your hair out of your face. “Sweet dreams y/n” he said and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. 


Taehyung

Originally posted by 4cyphers


You and Tae had made the brave decision to go out on a late night adventure. The only problem with that though, was your lack of energy. You both ended up in his car at a look out point at around 2 am. You and Tae had snacks in hand and sodas as you spent an hour alone, talking about your lives. You were tired but you didn’t want the night to end. You hated yourself for lacking the energy Tae had. 

After a while, you stayed quiet and so did he. Just looking at the lights that lit up the streets that night. You didn’t realize how tired you’d become until your eyes fell shut, falling asleep comfortable to the sound of the soft music in the car. When Tae asked you if you wanted to go home and received no answer, he turned to you and was greeted with your peaceful appearance as you slept soundly. He smiled at your sleeping figure and took his jacket off to cover you. “Lets go home” he said before driving back home.  


Jungkook

Originally posted by nochujungkookie


“Kookie, can you please give me your jacket. I’m cold” You whined. You were suffering from the cold and had constant chills. Your boyfriend rolled his eyes playfully before he got up to make you a tea. “I’ll be back jagyia, use the blanket” he said as he handed you a fluffy blue blanket. 

When he returned, he handed you the tea and sat down beside you in bed again. He let you finish your tea before he opened his arms to welcome you. “Come here” he said. You quickly moved up and curled up beside him, intertwining your legs with his. You fell asleep to his steady heart beat and finally got you much needed rest. Jungkook looked down and saw you sleeping peacefully. He smiled to himself because he adored seeing you so peaceful. “I love you jagyia” he sighed and kissed your head.  


MASTERLISTS

Post-Kerberos! Matt HC

★ When the rebellion group helped him escape, he just ended up sticking with them and eventually became one of the best fighters there???

★ He doesn’t have any idea where his dad is, but scavenges through old Galran tech to hopefully find out.

★ The group is pretty much amazed by humans and low-key terrified of them bc of Matt 

★ He dislocated his shoulder once and the group was like, “it’s horrible to see another one go,,,,” and Matt was just like “???? i can put it back in place????” 

  • Matt: Guys,,,,stop crying,,,,this can be fixed,,,,,
  • Rebellion leader: i saw a dear friend die bc of that, there is no survival
  • Matt: *silently puts in back in place*

★ He has a scar over his right eye bc of the Galra

★ The Galra also found out he needed glasses and basically went, “well we can’t have The Champions friend like this!” and injected some weird shit into his eyes. Matt no longer needs glasses, but his eyes change colors depending on his mood and who he’s talking too

★ Matt, talking to keith as his eyes turn red: And so– why the fuck are you pulling out your sword?

Keith, seeing Matt’s eyes turning yellow as he talks to Hunk: “Uhm guys? Are we sure that Matt isn’t Galra?”

  • “I am right here”

★ When he first heard of Voltron his main thought was, “Well that sounds lit” but when he hears that ‘The Champion’ aka Shiro is their leader, he immediately turns into that Mr.Krabs meme

★ Somehow some people find a picture of the paladins and everybody is just “???? the tiny one resembles matt”

★ Matt automatically realizes it’s Katie and that the red paladin is Keith and just,,,screams for roughly 5 hrs

★ Why is everyone he knows up in space? He has no fucking clue but w/e

★ Makes it a personal mission to track down Voltron for himself and the rebellion

★ They end up showing up eventually to make allies

★ The Paladins talk to some civilians first, so Allura and Coran meet up with the Rebellion leader

  • “Number 5?! How’d you get here so quickly??” “Funny story actually,,,”
  • The real Pidge shows up like 0.5 seconds later
  • Pidge//Katie, tearfully: “MATT”
  • Matt, nearly sobbing: Oh shit waddup

★ Keith screams at him for a solid 10 minutes before tearing up

  • “It’s okay. I know you’re gay and texan already, Keith”
  • “I fucking hate you”

★ There’s a tie between whether Pidge or Shiro cried more

★ Allura: I’m princess Allura and you are?
    Matt:
single and willing–i meAN MATT

 ★ **Takes in Katie’s appearance** “Well, one of us is going to have to change”

★ **Inspecting Shiro’s arm** “Yo, your weapon is just a bitch slap”

★ “,,,,,you guys do realize Allura just picked your lions off of your clothes right???” “No she–holy shit”

★ “whY DON’T YOUR LIONS HAVE SEAT BELTS?! YOU’RE GONNA DIE AT 6 SHIRO”

  • He essentially spends his time pointing out problems with basically everything tbh

★ “Why does Voltron represent the olympic rings??”

★ He realizes Keith has a crush on Lance in like a couple of days

  • “weLL I HEARD YOU GOT A SPECIAL SOMEONE ON THE SIDE, KEITH”
  • “Listen here, you piece of shit”

★ Slowly comes to the realization that he likes both Shiro and Allura

  • “Coran have you ever heard of a pickle?”

★ He helps Coran around the castle and stuff

  • “And this is the Teludav” “Y’all have fucking teletubbies here?”

★ Him and Hunk team up to annoy Shiro and Lance with puns

  • “I’m just over the moon with excitement”
  • “Aren’t you glad i’m not lion in the cold depths of space??”

★ Him and Slav get along pretty well

  • Shiro hates it

★ “In this timeline, there is a 42% chance of you getting together with the two of them.” “Thanks buddy”

★ “Why did you choose five kids to defend the universe there’s so many ways this could go wrong”

★ Him and Hunk set up the lions to play “What’s new pussycat?” 7 times with one “It’s not unusual” before resuming ‘What’s new pussycat?’

  • “For years, scientist have wondered if you can make 3 teens, 1 adult, and 3 aliens weep tears of joy by playing Tom Jones’ “It’s not unusual”.”

★ Lance is amazed by how smooth his skin is

  • Like, you’ve been in space for 2 years???? And majority of that was with the Galra??? Tell me your secret

★ Everyone figures out Matt’s crush on both Allura and Shiro and try to get them together

  • One plan consisted of a rock, 15 cups of nunvil, and a very upset bounty group.

★ Matt actually likes nunvil

★ The Lions all take a liking to him and everyone would be salty, but he looks adorable when he talks to them so they deal with it

★ Pidge voice: I’ve banned Hunk because he kept messing with my shit but now—
    Matt voice: yO I GOT MARIO KART RUNNING ON THIS

★ He appreciates the fact that Hunk points out all the weird shit that’s going on while everyone else just accepts it

★ “Do you think i could install the internet to my mind?”
★ **sees all the upgrades Pidge added to Green** “yO—YO!”

★ Anytime Shiro or Allura do anything remotely romantic to him, ‘What the heck i gotta do’ starts blasting from the Green Lion

★  Allura called his ears cute once, and nobody saw him for 6 hrs until Lance found him frantically grabbing Altean romance novels while whispering, “what does it mean?!”

★ They go to a planet where it’s considered normal to have more than one partner

  • Coran convinces the newly dubbed “Poly triangle” to pretend they’re actually dating for reasons unknown
  • They pull it off so well that the Aliens eventually ask when they’re gonna get married
  • Everyone had vastly different reactions

★ “You guys are fighting Zarkon right? Why don’t you just turn him Zarkoff?”

★ Hunk voice: Um, guys, what are those things?
    Obviously annoyed Matt voice: Aliens. 
    Different ranges of offended Allura, Coran and Keith voices: Excuse me?

★ “I’m fucking tired. beam me up, Scotty”

★ Keith, kneeling down on one knee: “Matt, Allura, will you do me the honor of marrying my stupid brother?”

★ “Voltron? More like Dabtron.”

  • “How do I return a brother?”

★ “caTCH THESE GAY HANDS ZARKON”

★ Tried to convince Shiro to let him Pidge and Hunk install a laser gun sound effect or the lightsaber noise to his arm

★ Once, he finally found the courage to tell Shiro and Allura that he liked them but they mistook it as him saying he enjoyed their company or smth along those lines

  • He tried to throw himself out the airlock afterwards

★ Lotor eventually shows up and everyone is tense bc he’s shown interest in the Blue Lion

★ Lotor sees Matt, and just pushes Lance out of the way: Hello there ;)

  • Everyone pretends not to notice Shiro’s eye twitch and Allura breaking the weapon she was holding
  • Lance was offended at first but seeing their reactions made it worth it

★ Matt is oblvious to Lotor’s attempts though

  • Everytime he gets close, Matt just assumes it’s some weird galra thing

★ “Raindrops on roses, Allura’s white hair, Shiro’s back muscles and Allura’s eyes. These two could probably kick his ass and they’re a few of Matt’s favorite things”

★ Obviously exasperated Pidge voice: You guys just need to bone
    Stern Matt voice: What did you say?
    Pleading Hunk voice: Please don’t say it again
    Not Caring Pidge voice: I said you guys need to bone
    Shocked, Furious Matt voice: B O N E!?

★ They visit a planet with very tall aliens and of course shenanigans ensure

★ Keith voice: Y’know Allura, Shiro, you should probably hold Matt’s hand, so he can’t get lost everyone around here is pretty tall

  • **Disappointed, obviously knows what you’re doing Shiro Glare**
  • Completely oblivious, already grabbing Matt’s hand Allura voice: Of course! We wouldn’t want that!”
  • **Undignified, silent squeal from Matt**

★ Hunk voice: The stars sure are beautiful tonight
    Lance voice: Y’know what else is beautiful?
    Pidge and Keith voices: A loving relationship between Matt, Shiro and Allura

★ Eventually, the time comes where there’s a serious fight that both Shiro and Allura have to go through alone, and Matt freaks tf out and terribly confesses to the both of them:

  • “Okay, listen tf up. I can’t do that dramatic thing where I pull you down and kiss you and say, ‘Come back to me’ since there’s two of you. But I will say that I love you both, and if you dont come back i’m taking out the entire Galran Empire myself”

★ Allura and Shiro are both shocked but Matt is already fast walking away so they can’t say anything

  • They come back and make a beeline for him
  • “LISTNE IVE KNOWN HIM LONGER PRINCESS”
  • “I QUIZNAKING SAVED YOUR BUTT BACK THERE I GET TO KISS HIM FIRST”
  • Allura makes it to him first

★ Keith cries, Pidge and Hunk pull out a confetti cannon they made for this occasion, Lance falls to his knees in victory, Coran pulls out a cake. Everything is good in the Universe.


[Read Part One// Pre! Kerberos! Matt HC here!]

anonymous asked:

andreil pda around the foxes pleaseee my soul needs it

my marvelous anon, i am here to grant thine request, with a small side of accidental lowkey renison. enjoy <3. also on AO3.


He did it. He actually did it. After months of constant warnings and threats, Wymack finally followed through.

Neil can do nothing but stare at the flyer in his hand, mildly in fear and majorly in shock. A mere thirty seconds prior, Wymack had stormed out of his office brandishing this piece of paper like both a white flag and a declaration of war. He had paused just inside the lounge, making sure to gather everyone’s attention, before striding over to Neil and shoving the flyer in his face.

“This is for last weekend,” Wymack had said. “I already—don’t give me that look, you know exactly what the fuck I’m talking about. I already signed you up. It starts at 8:00 AM on Saturday, and unless you want your ass glued to the bench for the rest of the season, I suggest you be there.” He had then turned back around and disappeared into the hallway, leaving a room full of confused and curious Foxes in his wake.

A full minute passes before chaos breaks out and everyone starts moving at once. Various forms of “What the hell?” can be heard from all corners of the room. Neil blinks as the flyer is yanked out of his hand. He looks up to see Andrew, his eyes scanning the paper. Andrew looks up at him, and Neil’s heart nearly explodes because this look on his face, it looks like the honest-to-god beginnings of a smile. And sure, it’s at Neil’s expense, but he would embarrass the fuck out of himself at every turn if this was his reward. Andrew moves to hand the paper back to Neil.

“Okay, seriously,” Kevin huffs out with impatience as he pushes through his teammates. He snags the flyer away from Andrew who couldn’t be bothered to stop him. Kevin reads aloud, “The Annual Hilton Head Island Marathon…a MARATHON? Really, Neil?! Is this a joke?”

“I don’t know, Kevin,” says Andrew, his voice taking on the persona of a kindergarten teacher. “Did it look like a joke to you?”

Kevin’s only response is to scowl and shove the flyer into Neil’s chest. “This better not affect your performance at our game on Friday. You don’t get to take it easy just because you have to run 26.2 miles the next day.”

By the time Kevin has stormed out of the building, the rest of the Foxes have commenced their team wide freak out.

“Seriously?! He actually came through on that threat?” Dan is caught halfway between being genuinely worried and dying of laughter.

“Neil…bro…what the fuck…” Matt says from somewhere on his left, placing a consoling hand lightly on his shoulder.

“Oh my god, Neil. We have to be there. I have to witness this historic moment. You finally get to put your insane running habits into practice,” Allison is rambling from across the room.

“Wait, what was Wymack talking about ‘last weekend’? What did you do?” Asks Nicky, unaccustomed to being out of the loop.

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shades of wrong (m)

Summary: In which you’re sure you’ll hate Park Jimin with every fiber of your being for the rest of your existence, even after he is assigned your tutor for History of Magic.
Pairing: Jimin | Reader
Genre: Fluff/Smut; Harry Potter AU 
Word Count: 17,321
Author’s Note: This got insanely long, and I apologize but also not really. Inspired by @jeonbegins + her really dope HP Slytherin Jimin AU edit. I also had a little conversation with @minsvga about this and she helped me figured out the basic idea for what this story has become; and @chokemejimin has asked to be tagged in my HP work so here you go my dear!!!

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No matter how hard you try, it seems as if you are always bested by Park Jimin in every aspect of life: from Quidditch to school to class popularity.

And you absolutely despise him for it.

Granted, it’s probably because he’s always simply excelled in everything while you could only manage the minimum requirement for things outside of the sport you’ve grown to be so passionate about—but that’s only deepened your dislike for the boy. It’s been like this since the pair of you were children, a rivalry already planted between you even before you knew what the term meant. Truthfully, it was pretty much written in the stars that you would develop some deep-rooted grudge against Jimin, for he was organized into Slytherin while you were put in the fiery red and gold of Gryffindor.

Beyond the clashing Houses that have officially formed your backgrounds, it doesn’t help that the boy has seemed to uphold a particular interest in doing whatever he could to see you fidget or watch you squirm or just catch you at your worst moments—although you humor yourself on the idea that these unfortunate incidents occur to you because of Park Jimin’s constant hovering. It’s a habit that’s grown since the first week of your admission into Hogwarts, in which your big mouth scored you your first detention with the infamous Professor Snape.

It’s a moment that marks the beginning of an unspoken battle between the pair of you—in which you would constantly attempt to prove yourself better than Park Jimin and Park Jimin doing everything he could to make sure you could never have that victory. During the first two years of school, this would mean beating you on every exam, knowing the answers to every question and teasing you for not knowing. Professors putting Jimin on a pedestal, marking him up as the ‘ideal student’ and unknowingly intensifying the dagger of hatred you wished to plunge deeper and deeper into his chest.

When you are twelve, you are told that there is certainly no way for you to truly despise of something (or someone)—for you are young and naive and not entirely capable to understand what it means to hate something with every fiber of your being.

But they’re wrong.

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Jump me, bro?


Prompted myself with: “I just want a neighborhood AU where Stiles is the bro-iest bro to ever bro and Derek pines after him anyway.”

I’m trying to get better about moving my twitterfics over to a more readable format without overthinking them, so we’ll see how that goes. (Also on AO3)

Derek’s house is a couple doors down from what he’s pretty sure is a frat house-wannabe. He’d drop the qualifier—as an undergrad, he’d unfortunately lived close enough to frat row to recognize the distinctive loud parties, music thumping late into the night, a stream of girls constantly flowing in and out the doors, bros drunkenly crooning along to badly-tuned guitars—but as far as he can tell, all of the guys are at least a few years out of college.

Resisting the urge to call the cops with a noise complaint takes some effort. Derek doesn’t particularly want to be that guy, though; he still has to live in this neighborhood. And a part of him, much as he doesn’t want to admit it, simply wishes he’d been invited. It’s not that it sounds like fun, exactly. Derek didn’t enjoy those types of parties when he was in college, and he’s not nearly old enough yet for the nostalgia to kick in. It’s just that…well, it would be nice to be included.

He carefully doesn’t think about the fact that the shift from outright irritation to a sort of wistful longing happened around the time that he saw one particular guy hanging around in front of the house, surrounded by his friends.

Derek does not find frat bros attractive. He never has. He never will. A certain long-limbed guy with an infectious laugh and warm brown eyes won’t change that.

He finds other ways to channel his frustration, some more productive than others. On nights when he takes his trash to the curb, he makes his way down to the overstuffed bins haphazardly jumbled in front of the pseudo-frat house. Under cover of darkness, shielded by the noise pouring through the brightly-lit windows, he sorts through the upper layers of his neighbors’ trash, separating stacks of greasy pizza boxes from sticky piles of beer cans.

It’s primarily to be a good citizen. Every house in the neighborhood has separate recycling bins—they’re even color coded, making it incredibly easy to put the correct materials in the appropriate spot. Derek’s just doing his part for the environment, since his obnoxious neighbors refuse to take a few extra seconds out of their day. At least, that’s what he tells himself when he’s sticking his fingers in strangers’ trash. He’s pretty sure it doesn’t count as trespassing if he’s not actually going into the yard, and he’s not stealing anything. Just…moving things around a little.

The other reason’s one he doesn’t like to dwell on. The rational side of his brain recognizes that the guys in this house don’t even know him, so why would they invite him over? This isn’t like high school, when he was the nerd people intentionally ignored. They’re living their lives, he’s living his, and it’s perfectly natural for them to not intersect.

But one night, as Derek slaps the lid of the recycling bin shut, wishing he’d brought a roll of paper towels or maybe even some wet wipes, he looks up and finds one of the bros standing on the front porch, watching him.

Derek freezes in place. He can’t immediately identify the person; from the street, all he can see is a tall, athletic figure backlit by the open front door. He’s expecting to be chased off the property, probably cussed out in the process, but the guy comes down the steps and lifts the lid of the recycling bin, dropping his empty beer can inside.

“Thanks for doing that, bro,” he says. “The guys don’t spend a lotta time thinking about the environment.”

It’s not just a bro. It’s the bro. The one Derek hasn’t been able to stop thinking about. His first time speaking to Derek, and it’s because he caught Derek rummaging around in his garbage late at night.

“You’re uh, you’re welcome,” Derek says.

Fortunately, the guy doesn’t seem to care about getting an explanation. He introduces himself instead: Stiles. Of course his name would be equally intriguing, Derek thinks, annoyed with himself for even caring about this interaction.

Derek gives his name in turn, wondering if he should point out his house to make his presence here seem less weird, but Stiles doesn’t seem inclined to linger in the cold. He heads back inside, giving Derek a brief, friendly wave before shutting the door again.

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Just Following Orders, Sir - Mitch Rapp

Author: @mf-despair-queen

Characters: Mitch Rapp/Reader

Word Count: 11,985

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Oral (both receiving), Multiple Orgasms, Shower Sex, Teasing, Death of bad guys, Sir, Squirting, Voyeurism, Boob Job

Notes: I know this is long overdue, but the word count makes up for it right? I got delayed because of Howler Con (I lost 3 says yo). I hope you guys like this. I liked this idea a lot actually.

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How them 2000s live actions kids shows be
  • Normal Girl: *internally* I'm just a normal high school girl. I suck at math. I hate my parents. When someone asks me about my opinion on complex socioeconomic issues, I just go "What the heck!?" and start "texting" or something like that. My life would be just like yours, except for one thing: I have an amazing power... I can talk to cetaceans!
  • *at the docks, a bell tolls as our normal protagonist hears the voices of cetaceans bubbling in her mind*
  • Normal Girl: *staring deeply into the ocean*
  • Best Friend: Ahoy! What're you doing?
  • Normal Girl: Just staring into the oceanic abyss, thinking about how much I hate my parents. *internally* I have to keep my ability to speak to cetaceans secret or else... uh...
  • Best Friend: Haha, I feel that, friend. What a colorful life we teens live, our seaside environment awakening a rumbling darkness within ourselves of which we mull on our own with nothing but the unbounding depths of the ocean as our one escape. An escape which serves to only maim our fragile egos with newfound adolescent anxieties.
  • Normal Girl: What are you even talking about?
  • Best Friend: I don't know. I haven't slept in a week. Let's go to the mall.
  • *at the mall*
  • Normal Girl: *internally* My town might as well be called Lamesville. Nothing ever happens here, but the mall can be pretty fun. It's only place in the whole town with anything in it that isn't fish or excessive amounts of woodlice.
  • Best Friend: ...So I'd just dance and I'd dance until my feet broke. When that happened, I'd just get up and dance on my broken feet. And I did this until they were raw and blood was everywhere. I kept waking up in the morning extremely exhausted after this dream. I decided to record myself one night and it turns out I was dancing in my sleep. I haven't slept since I saw that. *leans in close to the normal girl* I'm afraid of what I'll do in my sleep.
  • Normal Girl: Wow, sounds weird... I guess. *sips coffee*
  • Best Friend: OMIGAWD! It's Chad Alphakid. He's coming this way!
  • *the normal girl and her best friend squee*
  • Normal Girl: *externally* That's Chad Alphakid. Who is he? He's only the hottest most coolest boy in this entire lame city. I've been crushing on him since I was like twelve.
  • Chad: Uh, okay.
  • Normal Girl: Did I just say that out loud!?
  • Chad: *sits at the table* Listen, I don't care what you or your friend think of me. I need help!
  • Best Friend: Have you murdered somebody?
  • Normal Girl: Do you need a girlfriend?
  • Chad: No, it's the ocean. The sound of her waves crashing against the shore is like a faultless siren song. There isn't a single night where I don't have visions of floating within her cold embrace. The allure of her boundless depths beckon to me like a lover. I'm afraid that if I don't get help soon, I'll find myself taken away by her to a fate unknown.
  • Normal Girl: *internally* Great, this is a chance to finally use my power to speak to cetaceans to my benefit! *externally* But why do you need us to help you?
  • Chad: You guys are the biggest fucking degenerate weirdos in this washed up town. If anyone knows how to deal with this, it's you two.
  • Best Friend: Haha, truuuuuu!
  • Normal Girl: I'm not a weirdo! I'm a completely normal girl.
  • Chad: Dude, you fucking talk to fish.
  • Best Friend: You do talk to fish.
  • Normal Girl: I don't talk to fish! *internally* I talk to cetaceans, they're mammals, not fish. Also, that's supposed to be a secret, dammit!
  • *at the shore*
  • Chad: Ah, Mother Ocean! Take me!! Take me!!! *attempts to run into the ocean, but gets held back by the normal girl and her best friend*
  • Best Friend: Simmer down, aqualad!
  • Chad: Why did you fools take me here, if not to release into the embrace of sweet Mother Ocean!?
  • Normal Girl: We talked it over and we decided that the best way to get you over your obsession is make you hate the ocean.
  • Chad: Does it involve you talking to fish?
  • Normal Girl: Yes, I mean no. I mean, fuck! Cetaceans aren't fish.
  • *the normal girl sits at the edge of shore, her eyes rolls up in her head as she proceeds to make fucked up porpoise sounds*
  • Normal Girl: *falls over limp*
  • Best Fried: She died.
  • Chad: Does this mean that I'm free to wade into Mother Ocean and meet my fate among her ever chaotic waes?
  • Best Friend: *lets chad go* Yeah, dude. I'm too far gone to care about things anymore.
  • Chad: *strips off all of his clothes* Good. I now understand that there was no avoiding this. This was always a forgone conclusion. My fate is with the waves. Sayonara, weird best friend guy.
  • Chad: *runs into the ocean*
  • Best Friend: *kicks the normal girl's body* Guess she really is dead.
  • Best Friend: *walks home as the night encroaches* My closest friend is dead, and Chad is probably dead too. I wonder where my fate lies?
  • Best Friend: *yawns* Maybe I should go to sleep and just dance myself to death finally. No, I don't think I could go to sleep even if I wanted to anymore. I'm probably going to die from exhaustion in the next few days, not having felt rest or comfort again. Or maybe I'll just stay awake forever. I feel like I was supposed to have an epiphany here, or some type of awakening. But, there's nothing. I feel like everything I've ever done has been pointless. God, I'm just really tired.
  • *back at the shore*
  • Porpoise: *beaches itself*
  • *a gray fleshy version of the normal girl crawls halfway out of the porpoises mouth*
  • Normal Girl: There goes my corpse! *drags her weird porpoise body towards the corpse* Why did I die with such a dumb expression on my face? Lame! I hope Chad didn't see.
  • Normal Girl: *looks around with beady eyes* No one's here. I can finally do this.
  • Normal Girl: *kisses her dead body on the lips* Blargh!
  • Normal Girl: *spits out blood* I bit my tongue when I died. Gross. I guess I can cross making out with my dead body and becoming a mermaid off of my bucket list, though.
  • Normal Girl: *sighs*

for @portentous-offerings who is my sick buddy today. Feel better my friend ^_^ 

“She’s never going to love me.”

It was so quiet she almost missed it.

“What did you say Kitty?” she asked, her face still pressed into his back from where they were cuddling in her bed.

“Forget it. I shouldn’t have said anything,” he said, rolling over and giving her a cheeky smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“Are… are you talking about Ladybug?” she asked softly, feeling the knot of guilt that had steadily been building over the last few months of this strange friendship they had fallen into.

He didn’t bring up her alter ego very often. The subject of romance in general always seeming to carry some sort of bizarre taboo whenever he stopped by for his increasingly frequent visits. Not that Marinette had minded. She had Alya to cry to about her lack-luster love life after all, and given how unwaveringly supportive he was about all of her other problems, it seemed silly to hold it against him that he was uncomfortable talking to a girl about crushes and the like.

His eyes flashed guiltily and he rolled back over, staring out into the darkness of the room.

“Really it’s nothing,” he said again, but he couldn’t quite mask the defeated tone that colored his words.

It was a sound she was all too used to. The same defeated cadence that had echoed from her own lips after her disastrous attempt at confessing to Adrien 5 months and 27 days earlier that no amount of Rom-coms or Alya suggested poster-burning had been able to cure.

“Chat, it isn’t nothing,” she said, sitting up and gently trying to pull him back around. He didn’t budge, still keeping his gaze obstinately fixed at something that she couldn’t see. “If it matters to you… it isn’t nothing. Not to me.”

“It’s not appropriate,” he said softly, “and it’s not fair to you.”

“Shouldn’t I get to be the judge of that?”

“It would be selfish-“

“So be selfish!” she said with a slightly forced laugh. “Trust me, you have a long way to go before you catch up to my level of selfish so I am hardly one to judge.” She teased her fingers through his hair, letting her nails scratch delicately against his scalp and felt him relax in spite of himself.

“Yeah right,” he scoffed lightly, “your strange phone kleptomania aside, you’re a pretty stand-up person.”

“Hey, I will have you know I have been working very hard to reform my phone-napping ways,” she teased, hoping to draw out a real smile from him.

“You stole Alya’s phone just last week!”

“That was a special circumstance. I told you so,” she pouted. “Besides, Adrien doesn’t deserve to be taunted like that no matter what Alya might say about it,” she added softly.  

She felt Chat stiffen slightly, his cat ear twitching at her words, and she was once again suspicious that he knew all about her romantic trouble regardless of their lack of conversation on the subject. She flushed at the thought.

“You are one of the most selfless people I know,” he said, reaching up to grasp her hand in his own and give it a brief reassuring squeeze.

The guilt Marinette was feeling was almost overpowering as the thought of the secrets she was keeping from him weighed on her like a stone. He had never questioned how they had fallen into such an easy friendship, and she had become too attached to having him as a part of her life- her normal everyday life- to be willing to admit the one-sidedness of it all. Here she was getting mopey over someone she had sworn she was done chasing after in front of a guy whose heart she routinely seemed to trample into the dust. Talk about selfish.  

“Please just tell me,” she whispered, her fingers resuming their seductive strokes that she knew full well would reduce him to a compliant puddle in her lap.

He was silent for a few more moments before finally letting out a small defeated sigh.

“I was just thinking about everything and I guess I just…” he hesitated. “She’ll never love me. I know that. I think on some level I always suspected as much.”

His voice wasn’t bitter or angry, and that calm resignation shattered her own heart into a million pieces more than the actual words he was saying.

“I think,” he continued, “I think I will be ok with it. She loves someone else. She doesn’t really say much about it, maybe to preserve our identities or maybe because she doesn’t want to hurt my feelings, but every once in a while she lets something slip and it’s not that hard to put the pieces together. I always thought it was so cheesy in the movies when people would say things like I just want her to be happy, but I think I get it now. She’s incredible and I am always going to love her, but she doesn’t need me to make her happy.”

Marinette could feel the tears pooling behind her eyes as the words poured out of him in his soft, even tone. Her fingers were frozen, buried in his lush golden hair, her breaths turning shallow and frantic as the words reverberated through her like an electric current.

She stared down at the boy beside her. Her precious, irreplaceable kitten, who loved her so fiercely and believed in her so much. Who was willing to call her out for her faults and yet somehow still believed her capable of rising above them.

“She’s smart,” Chat continued, his voice seeming to echo in the near silence of the night, “and I know that whoever she does choose is going to be someone who can make her happy. Somebody good and funny and able to keep up with her when she is at her best and keep her grounded when she’s at her worst. So I think I can be ok with that.”

She tried to imagine what her future would be with some potential lover. Her heart lurched slightly at the thought of Adrien, her own love that was apparently not to be. She brushed that thought aside and instead tried to picture a world where she was curled up beside some new face, running her fingers through hair that wasn’t blonde.

She had to choke back a sob.

The slight twinge of pain she had felt at the momentary reminder that she and Adrien would never be more than friends was nothing to the soul rendering terror she felt at the sudden realization that finding a new love would inevitably mean losing Chat.

They would still be friends. Of course, it wouldn’t be the same. It wouldn’t be like this. He would never impose like that. Not her Chat. Her partner who was good, and funny, and who had seen her at her best and her worst, who knew her better than anyone, and who still had never made her feel anything less than precious. Her dearest friend who just the momentary thought of a life without him made her feel like she was dying.

Chat let out a small self-deprecating laugh and Marinette wondered how she had ever been so blind.

“So yeah,” he said finally twisting back around to look up at her, “I think I’ll be ok. Even if she doesn’t love me.”

She gazed down at him, his brilliant green eyes glowing in the near darkness of the night, a tired smile on his face that she longed to see transformed into his usual infectious grin, as the truth hit her like a bolt of lightning.

“I do,” she said breathlessly, before leaning down to capture his lips in a long overdue kiss.

Haikyuu!! Fiction Recommendation Master Post

I have been meaning to make this post since a while now. Let’s share some love shall we? I recommend these fictions based on my personal judgment. If you see your work up here that’s cause I loved it to the moon and back! I welcome suggestions too! ^-^ 

♥ - ultimate fav

★ - they do the do

(★) - implied sexual activities 

ロ - unfinished 

■ - finished

✿ - multi chapters



KageHina (Kageyama x Hinata) 

Summary:  Kageyama balanced his cheek on his fist, leaning an elbow on the counter and smiling, “Do your parents know where you are, sweetie?”
“I— what?! Why would they— I’m twenty-three!”
Kageyama gasped sarcastically, “Are you! Well, I’ll be! I’m still gonna need to see some ID, though.”
“Amazing.” The boy laughed, “You really know how to sass someone who’s holding a gun to your face, huh?“

Summary: There he was.The redhead clicked the notification and waited impatiently for the page to load.“hello again, sunshine! working on any new pieces lately? i’d love to see your progress if you want to share! hope today was great for you!” Hinata grinned from ear to ear as he typed his reply, “i started a new piece just for you, blueberry! here’s what i’ve got so far! :)”

 Summary: A smutty, drunken one-shot for ‘Anonymous asked a question’ 

Summary:  Hinata pines.

Summary:  Oh. He’d never seen anyone give him that expression before. Not with so much raw sincerity. And for a moment, Kageyama had to look away, swallowing awkwardly, thinking that maybe he had just looked into the sun itself. 

Note: Part of a series. The continuation: Facing the Sun

Summary: It’s too dark to go over the mountain, he’d said. You might get hurt, he’d said. What will we do if you can’t play in the practice match on Monday, he’d said. Kageyama had said a lot of things and in the end, he’d coaxed Hinata into staying the night because yeah, everything was true, and yeah, maybe he would be better off spending the night at Kageyama’s, but then they’re changing for bed and Hinata is in nothing but boxers and a shirt and Kageyama is cupping his jaw in both hands and kissing like he might fall of the face of the earth if he doesn’t and Hinata thinks that maybe, Kageyama had some ulterior motives.

Note: Part 3 of Theirs series. First part: Blush 

Summary: 'Kageyama doesn’t know why Hinata’s face rubs him the wrong way—it just does. So one day, in an attempt to pinpoint exactly what it is that makes Hinata’s Shouyou’s fucking face so fucking annoying, he begins to catalogue all the things that really tick him off.This proves to be startlingly revelatory.’–A thought-provoking study and critical analysis of Hinata Shouyou’s stupid face, by Kageyama Tobio.

Summary:  Hinata finds that he likes standing close to Kageyama on buses and trains. It doesn’t mean anything–probably. Maybe.

Summary: When Hinata Shouyou is 13 years old, his village is raided by pirates. Most everything Hinata knows is destroyed in the attack, lost to the flames, but he and his sister are pulled from the wreckage by a boy with eyes the color of a storm. Their lives are saved, but irrevocably altered - their home is lost forever, and there is something strange about the pirates, something blurry and shadowed and wrong. A darkness is rising out of the depths of the ocean. The sea itself is stirring, and nothing can stop it when it wakes.

Summary: Cooking is hard. Even if you have your very attractive, very grumpy neighbor there to help you. In which Hinata’s lack of cooking skills are a danger to him and others. Luckily (or not), Kageyama is willing to teach him, for the sake of avoiding any burned down apartments.

Summary:  Once a year, all the villages that follow the way of the sun offer up one of their own to be taken to the sun god’s divine temple. Kageyama Tobio, an orphan and loner, never wanted to be chosen—and until the sun god appeared, no one ever wanted to choose him, either. All Tobio wants is to find a place he fits in. What he actually gets is another story entirely.

Summary: The rainforest expedition is to last a full year—365 days of living under the lush canopy of trees. Danger looms. Adventure awaits. The jungle calls. Hinata Shouyou has never wanted anything more. Or so he thinks, until he meets a curious stranger there, who shows him what it means to be truly needed. AKA Tarzan au

Note: The art is gorgeous for this fic! Part of a series. The continuation: Wild 

Summary:  It was the boots that caught his attention. They looked new and expensive sticking up from the tall grass, visible from the small trail Shoyo was walking on. He cautiously trudged closer, almost against his will.
What Shoyo didn’t notice, however, was the creature watching him; blue eyes following the oblivious human like a prey. AKA creature!Kageyama au

Summary: This was how Shouyou, prince of the kingdom on the hill, ended up sitting on the wooden floor in front of the fire, roasting all the different kinds of meats in the crackling flames to eat. When he was done, he flopped over backwards, sprawling over the floor. Kageyama was watching him again. Shouyou rolled lazily onto his stomach and rested his head on his arm, smiling at him. “That was good,” he said. The food had been delicious. Watching Kageyama eat had been more so; the way his throat worked to swallow as he drank down the creamy, white milk, his white teeth as they sank into the succulent, tender meat, the little groans and sighs of pleasure he made as he tasted it. It had all made Shouyou so very, very hungry for more.

Note:  Part of a series. The continuation: Homecoming

Summary:  Life as a scrap hunter isn’t very eventful. Shoyo travels across the massive wasteland of an electronics dump in Area 5C every day, searching for machines, gadgets and batteries to sell. Stood in his yellow overall, one boot on a broken toaster, his voltage-tracker suddenly goes frantic in his hand. It’s detected something. Something big.

Summary: When lowly acolyte Hinata is tasked with bringing his temple’s monthly tax payment to the Centurion’s Villa, he hardly expects to have an encounter with Kageyama, the lavishly wealthy landowner and decorated army general himself. But Kageyama turns out to be far more interested in Hinata than the money, believing him to be a gift sent from the gods themselves. Before Hinata realizes what’s happening, he finds himself agreeing to stay at the villa, where Kageyama can spoil him to his heart’s content.To Hinata’s surprise, he soon finds himself growing attached to the brutally blunt yet strangely sweet Kageyama; but he is worried he won’t be able to hold the attention of a man who has everything, even as Kageyama starts to become everything to him.

Note: There are NSFW art included in the story


KuroTsuki (Kuroo x Tsukishima)

Summary: “I see you like it Between the Sheets.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Your drink. It’s good stuff but I’m more of a Blowjob kinda guy.”

Summary: Kei types up an unapologetic flyer titled: Are You Missing Your Underwear? It explains his cat’s thievery and gives his address. He prints a few out and half-heartedly puts them up on his street and at the local store on his way to university. Basically, Kei’s cat is trying to hook him up with the neighborhood hottie.

Summary:  Kuroo and Tsukki lie in bed together being cute.

Summary:  Kuroo needs to come clean, for once in his life, and Tsukishima should probably just start trying to be a better person. It’s hard, though, when things are just so easy like this.

Summary:  Tsukishima has never held a boy’s hand before. Kuroo is desperate to learn every line in his palm. This relationship, they begin to realize, might not end in pain after all.

Summary:  Getting up in the middle of the night to pee really shouldn’t have been such a huge commitment.

Summary:  Maybe it was destiny that Kuroo Tetsurou was meant to fall in love with Tsukishima Kei despite the fact that he was a ghoul, humanity’s natural enemy and Kei was one-hundred percent human.



IwaOi (Iwaizumi x Oikawa)

Summary: "Iwaizumi-san is definitely a top.” “I’d say Oikawa. He seems to like being in charge.” Matsukawa laughed at this, surveying the club members. “It’s a shame that we’ll never be able to find out who’s right.” Unfortunately, they do find out.

Summary:  He always got strangely sentimental, the closer he got to his heat. Which is precisely why today, he should not have shown up to the practice match. He knew better. Had always done better.

Summary: “You’re so cruel to me,” Oikawa whined down the line, and Iwaizumi snorted at that. “All I try to do is be nice, and here you are, saying all I want to do is talk shit on Ushiwaka! Which, you know, I do, but that’s beside the point. Do you like Ushiwaka, Iwa-chan?” “Of course I don’t, what are you -,” “Because I could just get him to fuck me instead.” (Oikawa had slipped into a bad habit of teasing him like this, and he’d had enough of it. It was time for Iwaizumi to shut Oikawa up, and to shut him up good.)

Summary:  “The skirt seems like a fantastic idea in Oikawa’s head.” Oikawa tries a new method of seduction on Iwaizumi, and it proves effective, though not as he expected it would be.

Summary: Iwaizumi blinked his gaze over to Oikawa, “Last time was supposed to be a one time thing,” he said, voice low, lacking some conviction.Oikawa’s lips twitched into a smirk and he brought them hovering just over Iwaizumi’s, “One time thing, Two time thing, what’s it matter as long as it’s not a Relationship thing?”

Summary:  In which Oikawa is a demon whose job is contracting humans for their souls, and his next victim is Iwaizumi. Somehow, what is supposed to be a quick case turns into a two year long affair – and then some.

Summary: In which Oikawa Tooru is a prince and Iwaizumi Hajime is his knight. “I want…I want…” Oikawa opened his eyes and for once Iwaizumi wished he couldn’t read them so well. ‘You. I want you,’ they said. Iwaizumi couldn’t let Oikawa say it for real, he couldn’t. It would destroy him. So he crashed his lips against Oikawa’s, silencing him, consoling him. “I know,” he whispered once they finally parted. He didn’t need to say that it didn’t matter what Oikawa wanted – what either of them wanted. They both knew already.

Summary: ‘A gift for you.’ Matsukawa’s voice echoed in his mind as he recalled the way his high school friend had slyly passed him a folded shopping bag under the table while they were in the middle of lunch. Matsukawa had insisted he look at it only when he got home, and feeling foolishly happy about the spur of the moment gift, he agreed. He wished, in hindsight, that he had looked instead. And that he had throttled Matsukawa for even thinking it was an appropriate gift.

Summary:  Oikawa might be a jealous person, but even that is nothing compared to the intrinsic possessiveness that all dragons have.

Summary:  for the “the new handyman’s hot so i’m gonna keep breaking stuff” au. Iwaizumi is the Handsome Handyman, and Oikawa is… Oikawa?

Summary:  There were things they always came back to. Some of those things were each other.
Or, Oikawa gets hit by an early heat, Iwaizumi carries him home. Something changes for the both of them.

Summary:  Despite common belief, making sure you don’t have to work a single day in your life is hard work. Luckily, Oikawa has mastered the skill.
But when his new target is the awfully… practical businessman Iwaizumi Hajime, Oikawa’s skills are put to the test, since Iwaizumi refuses to spend money on him. Yet, the two can’t ignore their mutual attraction, but with such different expectations for the relationship, there’s bound to be trouble.

Summary: This shower will be quick, Oikawa decides, reaching up for his luffa. He then goes to reach for his body wash. His eyes widen when he narrows in on the two objects in his hands. The luffa is white, and the body wash brand says Old Spice, something musky and masculine. Oikawa has never owned Old Spice in his entire life, and his luffa is definitely not white, looking like it came from some cheap dollar store.~AU where Oikawa accidentally stumbles into the wrong apartment.

Our Dirty Little Secret (M)

word count: 7k

genre: smut ; high school AU

pairing: reader/yoongi (yoonji)

summary: typical new student AU; they’re in a new school and need a guide and you’re so graciously volunteered. though, there is something strange about that new girl, min yoonji. something you want to figure out. 

warning(s)/kink(s): cross dressing, slight feminization, pet names, a little spanking, rough oral sex, semi-public sex, protected sex, hair pulling, slight dirty talk

songs: my hump – black eyed peas ; bang bang - jessie j ; attention - charlie puth

dedicated to: this is a suuuuper late b-day gift for my friend @1namkook i’m sorry it took so long, i had the illest writer’s block with it  ♡

masterlist

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Being Tony Stark’s Daughter (and dating Peter!) would include…

let’s do it again!

Requested by anon and @katiemcrae
“ Could you maybe do a fluffy headcanons about being Tony Starks daughter and dating Peter Parker? Thanks and I love your blog ^_^ “
AND “  YOOO those headcanons were good asffff !!! Do part 2 ??? I really liked them ! 💓❤️ “  
 
 

Tony Stark / Headcanon Masterlists

Piggy backs off of this!

  • You didn’t go to school, Tony thought it would be easier to just hire tutors and online school worked just fine. You and Tony do a lot of travelling, it was much better this way.
  • But that also meant you didn’t have many friends your age
  • Until Tony saw you watching a video online of “the amazing Spider-Man”
  • Tony wanted to recruit this boy
  • He could be helpful to the team
  • And Tony knows how to get information. Tony was able to figure out who was behind the mask after just a little bit of digging
  • Peter was ecstatic to be going to the residence of Tony Stark and the Avengers Compound
  • He was so happy to get a suit upgrade
  • *oh don’t mind peter and tony working on suit designs* *because you walk in*
  • “Hey, father, can I get onto your computer? Thanks, I want to change something in FRIDAY’s code.”
  • “(Y/N) NO DO NOT TOUCH FRIDAY!”
  • Peter like drops whatever he is working with because he is so stunned to be in the presence of yn stark
  • “Ooooh, who’s the kid?” 
  • “yn this is Peter Parker-”
  • “Spider-Boy, right? I watch your videos on youtube.”
  • Peter is baffled that two people figured out his identity without even knowing him, well that or you saw the suit sitting in front of him
  • You picked up his goggles, “holy wowza no wonder you’re here you’re going to run into a wall with these things”
  • “I can see out of them perfectly fine…but i do need an upgrade” aka peter thinks you and tony don’t understand how his senses work but he wants to be around you so he admits he needs help
  • “yn would you like to help?” -tony
  • Peter dies on the inside because woRKiNg wITh YOu
  • You help a little bit but then have to leave because you have *important work* to do with Clint…aka montly intense cookie baking and dance off
  • Peter ends up staying around the base much more often. He has to train to be a superhero, as much as Tony doesn’t want him out there risking his life…Peter is stubborn and he has the powers to do it- might as well let him do it in a safer suit.
  • But Peter is catching eyes for you
  • He can’t help it
  • He wants to talk to you
  • Peter is v scared
  • And Tony can tell he feels this way. But Tony is stuck in between letting him calmly love you or telling him “stay away from yn” because tony doesn’t know how he feels 100% about Peter just yet
  • But the advances happen anyway
  • After months of him and you bonding over random, nerdy and cute things, he words up the courage to ask you on a date
  • you say yes, obviously, or this headcanon wouldn’t be a thing
  • So you two go to dinner and realize man we aren’t this fancy wanna go get ice cream
  • So now you two are dressed up like you’re going to a fancy restaurant when really you’re sitting in the middle of an ice cream parlor
  • But that’s ok, because it’s who you are
  • And this happens a few times. 
  • Dates include random walks to photography outings to movies to pizza to swinging around the city to literally sitting in Peter’s apartment playing Scrabble
  • You come home one day and tell your father you and Peter are officially dating
  • He doesn’t know how to feel about it
  • He doesn’t say anything for like…ten minutes
  • Steve is in the room and is very happy for you and Peter, but is getting worried about Tony
  • “Tony…do you need to sit down? You’re losing all color in your face.”
  • Tony doesn’t say anything but slowly sits down on the chair. He should have seen this coming. (shut up pietro). He knows you two have been hanging out a lot and he has seen how much fun you guys have. Why is he so shocked?
  • After taking time to think it through and regaining the color in his face, he realized that it wasn’t shock from you two dating…he was shocked he was okay with it
  • You’re his baby girl!
  • He’s supposed to protect you!
  • How can he let some immature teenager attempt to look after you?
  • At least it’s like a superhero and not some random boy you met on the street
  • BUT STILL
  • Tony sighs and gets his thoughts together. “Well, I’ve seen how happy you two are. Keep the happiness, it’s nice to see that”
  • “Thanks, dad”
  • “Thank you Mr. Stark.”
  • Tony has to force himself to stand up and by now Pepper is in the room and already filled in on the drama
  • “I better not catch you two kissing…or you have another thing coming!”
  • Pepper quickly rushes over and grabs Tony by the arm. “Shush, Tony, that’s their business.”
  • Pepper highkey loves that you two are together
  • She couldn’t be anymore happy
  • She had always wanted to hear you gush about your s/o, no matter if it was a girl or a boy! She just wanted to be there to hear about it.
  • And now she could
  • You two could sit up and talk for hours about nothing
  • And now you could fill her in on dates, because Peter is a fooking romantic who wants to give the best
  • “Last night he landed on my windowsill to give me roses but because he was swinging around so much, the petals flew off of all but one.” - you
  • “It’s the thought that counts…right?” - pepper
Confessions - Carl Gallagher Imagine

Originally posted by zgallagher

Warning: Sexual content, swearing, etc.

Word Count: 2277



“Carl, give it back!” you yelled, rolling your eyes and chasing your best friend up the stairs of the Gallgher house.  Since you had stopped to text a few times while the two of you were playing a video game on the couch, he took it upon himself to snatch the phone out of your hands and run away with it.

“Hey, I just wanna know who could possibly be so important that they could distract you as I kicked your ass in Call of Duty,” he teased, sprinting into his room and unsuccessfully attempting to slam the door before you put your foot in the doorway.

“Ow, what the fuck, Carl?” you yelled, limping in on the foot that hadn’t been crushed by the door.  “I was literally just answering my brother to let him know that I was spending the night here per usual!  And I was letting him know that I’d go grocery shopping tomorrow.  Now give me my phone back so I can finish kicking your ass downstairs.”

Carl smirked and raised his eyebrows at you, plopping down on Ian’s empty bed.  “Your brother.  Mhmm.” His eyes continued to nosily scan the screen of your phone.

“Yes, Carl, my brother.  I’m pretty sure we both know that I have nobody interesting to text considering I’ve been single for, what, six months now?  Now give me my phone back,” you demanded, inching forward and banging your hip into his dresser.  The rocking of the dresser caused a box to fall on the ground, spilling out its contents.  A smirk formed on your lips as your eyes scanned the ground.  It was your turn to tease him now.  “Ah, nice condoms.  I see someone has been getting the ladies?”

Carl immediately shot up to his feet, shoving you to the side and bending down to pick up the condoms off of the ground.  “Ha, I wish,” he said with a chuckle, a slight blush forming on his cheeks.  His shaky hands struggled to shove the contents back into the box.

You raised an eyebrow in response, stepping forward and ripping your phone out of his back pocket.  “What do you mean by that?” you questioned, walking around him and climbing up onto his bed as he remained on the ground.  “We’ve been best friends for years and I’m pretty sure we both know you’ve had your fair share of girls over here.”

“Yeah, I have, but…” He paused for a moment as he shoved the box into one of the drawers and slammed it closed.  “I’ve never gone, like, all the way with any of them… you know. Sure I’ve done just about everything else, but I’ve never actually done that with any of them.”  It was pretty clear he was embarrassed to confess this to you.

The smirk reappeared on your lips as he hesitantly climbed up onto his bed and plopped down beside you, his eyes refusing to meet yours.  “Wow, Carl Gallagher, a virgin?  When did you plan on telling me this?” you mocked, shoving his side before giggling quietly to yourself.

Carl clearly wasn’t amused.  He rolled onto his side so his back was facing you.  “Stopppp.”

You laughed yet again and rolled your eyes, squeezing his shoulder.  “I’m just messing with you.  I’m in the same boat as you.  No need to be embarrassed.”


“Really?” Your words caused Carl to roll back over to face you, his eyes scanning your face.  “Hmm. Interesting.”  Slowly, a smug grin formed on his lips.  “I guess that makes me feel a little better, but not completely.  Now since you’ve embarrassed me, it’s your turn to confess something about yourself.”

Your eyes widened as you shoved his chest with the palm of your hand.  “What? How is that fair?  I just confessed to the same thing!” you exclaimed, but Carl wasn’t having it.

“Nope,” he responded with a chuckle, grabbing your hand off his chest and holding it in his own a few seconds longer than usual. “You can’t have the same confession as me.  It has to be original.”  He was relentless.

“Ugh, fine,” you huffed, rolling over onto your back and staring up at the ceiling.  After a few moments of silent pondering, an idea finally came to your mind.  “I’ve never had an orgasm.”

The sheets ruffled as Carl shot up into a seated position on the bed.  A puzzled look took over his face as he stared down at you in disbelief.  “Wait, huh?”

You bit your lip as your cheeks began to heat up.  “I mean, yeah, is that so weird?”

Carl went silent for another few seconds, combing his fingers through his wavy hair as his face remained scrunched up in confusion.  “Well, yeah, kind of,” he started, nodding his head. “I get that you’ve never had sex, but I know you’ve done just about everything else with your past boyfriends.  And, what?  I just don’t understand.”

Your cheeks darkened even more as you looked down and began to play with your fingers.  “Sure I’ve done a lot of things with my past boyfriends, but… I don’t know.  None of them ever really brought me to that level.”

Still, Carl looked confused.  His eyes wouldn’t leave your embarrassed face as he tried to figure this out.  “Okay, so like, obviously your past boyfriends went down on you, right?”

This wasn’t exactly how had planned to spend your Friday night.  With a sigh, you sat up and rested your back against the wall.  “What do you mean by obviously?  Joey attempted it but got ‘tired’ and gave up after like thirty seconds. And Matt and Ben never did.  Matt said that it was weird and he’d rather not do it.  Ben said that girls like to go down on guys but guys don’t like to go down on girls.” You shook your head and covered your face with your hands.  “Can we please talk about something else now?”

Carl held up his hand in rejection and shook his head.  “No, no, no.  Not yet, Y/N.  I’m still confused,” he said, his wide eyes still burning into your face.  “So you’re trying to tell me that all three of those guys didn’t like going down on their girlfriends?”

“Yes, Carl, I guess that is what I’m saying,” you replied, beginning to get a bit annoyed.  “Why is this so hard for you to understand?”

Finally, a quiet laugh escaped Carl’s lips, but he still continued to shake his head.  “So you’re trying to tell me that there’s real guys that exist that don’t like to go down on their girlfriends?”

“Oh my god, yes, Carl.  That is what I’m saying.” Plopping down on your back again, you grabbed his pillow and threw it at his face.  “Enough now.”

“Wow.” He still wasn’t done.  “You’ve dated some really fucking weird guys, Y/N.”  When you only responded with an eye roll, he finally allowed himself to lay back down beside you.  “But still, never had an orgasm?  That’s insane.  You’ve been deprived.”

Your eyes at last met his as you shot him a glare.  “Wouldn’t know.”

“It’s amazing.  Heavenly, almost.  Feels so good it’s almost indescribable.” Carl’s eyes glowed as he described the obviously incredible sensation you had never experienced.  “Wish I could help you out with this one.”  After realizing what he said, the boy let out an awkward cough as his eyes darted to the ceiling.

“Yeah, me too,” you murmured, your cheeks changing to match the current color of his.  Not wanting to make things too awkward, you cleared your throat and sat up.  “Okay, we’re done with this.  Now it’s time for me to kick your ass in Call of Duty.”

The topic was dropped and the rest of the night was spent playing video games and stuffing your faces with junk food, which were your usual activities.  But something was different.  There was a tension between the two of you that usually wasn’t there.  Every so often, you’d catch Carl staring at you, causing his eyes to immediately dart away whenever you noticed.  More than once, you’d both go to reach into the bowl of popcorn between you at the same time and your hands would brush and linger near each other for a few moments too long.  The typical banter you two always shared now almost appeared to be what it always had been but neither of you would admit: flirting.  Sleeping together had never been an issue for the two of you, but tonight it was much more difficult for you both to get comfortable – not too close or too far away from one another.  Spooning was never weird before, but tonight Carl seemed extra fidgety as you pressed your backside into him.  Still, neither of you addressed the change and eventually managed to drift off to sleep.

You felt like you were on top of the world.  In heaven.  Straight ecstasy.  What a dream.

Your eyes flew open but the feeling didn’t go away. Your legs began to tremble as you propped yourself up on your elbows.  “F-Fuck… Carl?”

The moment you spoke up, the blankets were pulled back from your stomach and Carl’s face became visible between your thighs.  He looked up at you, flashing you a smirk.  “Good morning.  Wasn’t sure you were ever gonna wake up.”  Without another word, he inserted two fingers inside of you and moved his face back between your legs, darting his tongue across your clit.

The sensation was too good that you hardly knew how to react. A gasp escaped your lips as you bucked your hips up toward his face, increasing the pressure.  It was in that moment that it started to dawn on you what was happening.  “W-Wait. F-Fuck, Carl.  S-Stop,” you breathed out, but you knew it wasn’t what you wanted.

Carl pushed your hips back down on the bed and resurfaced again, pushing his wavy hair out of his face.  A smirk formed on his lips again as his eyes glanced between your shaking thighs and your awe struck face.  “You really want me to stop?”

Without another word, you pushed his head back down, caving into the feeling that was taking over your body.  “Don’t stop,” you demanded, contradicting your previous statement and tangling your fingers into his messy hair.

Carl immediately began to move his fingers inside of you again, his lips moving around your clit as he began to suck and swirl his tongue around at the same time.  Your moans got louder, causing Carl to increase the speed of his fingers.  His tongue was now gliding up and down your clit, increasing the pressure each time he made it to the top.

That was all it took.  Your hips ground against his face and you tugged on his hair, your eyes closing tightly as you climaxed and came against his tongue.  

As the world spun around you, you felt Carl climb back up and take his spot beside you, propping himself up on his elbow.  While you recovered, you could feel him staring at you, his eyes filled with nothing but admiration.

When you were finally able to catch your breath, you rolled over onto your side to face him and raised an eyebrow at him, grinning.  “Wow.”

“Sorry I didn’t wait to ask for your permission, but you were kind of moaning my name in your sleep beforehand, so I saw it as the perfect opportunity,” he said with a chuckle.  After a moment, the smile fell from his lips and he rolled onto his back. He cleared his throat and bit down on his swollen lower lip.  “And, uh, I don’t know if it was just me, but something felt different between us yesterday and, um, yeah… Kind felt like all those repressed feelings finally started coming up or something… I don’t know.”

Shaking your head, you moved closer to the embarrassed boy, cuddling into his side.  “It wasn’t just you.”

A small smile formed on Carl’s lips before it transformed into a smirk.  “You know, I once read that in order to have an orgasm, you need to be physically attracted to the other person.”

Rolling your eyes, you pushed Carl onto his back and climbed on top of him, straddling his waist.  “Yes, I’m attracted to you.  I guess everyone was always right whenever they said that we couldn’t just be friends,” you confessed, raising an eyebrow at him as a bulge began to form through his pants.  “And I’m guessing the feeling is mutual.”

Carl’s cheeks darkened a bit, but the smirk remained on his lips.  “You’re right.  I don’t go down on just anyone… Recently, at least.”

“How could I ever repay you?” you flirted, leaning down and resting your forehead against his.  You could tell you had the upper hand for once from the way he swallowed the lump in his throat and stared at you with wide eyes.  “Remember that confession you shared with me yesterday?”

Carl furrowed his brow and gave you a questioning look. “The one where I shamefully told you I’ve never had sex?  Yeah, what about it?”  God was he slow sometimes.

Brushing your nose against his, you wrapped your arms around his neck.  “How would you feel about changing that?”

That was all it took for it to click in his head.  His eyes widened for a moment before he grabbed your hips and flipped you over so he was on top.  He flashed you a smirk before brushing his lips against yours.  

“I guess maybe we’ll be able to call it even then.”


———-


Once again, I’m new to the game on here so please let me know if you enjoy! xx

Serendipity.

Pairing: Jungkook X Reader

Genre: Fluff (with slightly smutty undertones at the end) and a fail attempt at humor; Soulmate!AU where anything your soulmate does to their body reflects on your own

Soulmate Series: Yoongi | Hoseok | Jin | Jimin | Namjoon | Taehyung

Word Count: 2.6K

Originally posted by jungk0oksthighs

You’d never had a problem with the whole ‘soulmate’ deal, unlike some of your more passionate colleagues. It’d never sparked up much of a reaction in you, because honestly, who had the time to actually care? Besides, it did turn out to be rather amusing, most of the time.

Like when you were in the middle of discussing an important project with your professor, for example, and you felt something ticklish on the inside of your arm. You’d always been susceptible to even the slightest brush of the fingers, so you bit your lip hard to stop yourself from laughing out loud.

When you finally got to leave, you made a pit stop at the bathroom, to get a napkin or something to wipe your cut lip—go figure, you’d managed to bite it that hard—and you looked down at your wrist: the source of your problems. Looking at the squiggles on it, you felt like you were supposed to get angry, but honestly, the basic math problems drawn crudely with black ink made you laugh out loud. Sure, you got some strange looks from, like, one person for doing that, but you could tell your soulmate had to be hilarious.

You looked again, unable to resist smiling when you saw—and felt—more black ink being scribbled furiously onto your delicate skin. Your soulmate must have been having a math test or something soon; why else would they have been writing all that on their hand? Though, really, what an amateur move.

You took great delight in re-telling the story to your friends later, but it seemed like they’d reached the point where they were just tired of hearing you talk about your soulmate all the time. But really, they seemed great—and you really, really wanted to meet them. It’s just…you had no idea how.

Who knew a single conversation could change it all?

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