henchies

3

George Michael and Brooke Shields briefly dated in 1985. Shields, then 19, was still a virgin and Michael respected that, keeping the relationship chaste. Shields’ mother was a fan of Wham! and contacted Michael’s publicist, saying her daughter wanted to meet with him. Michael agreed to meet with Shields and arranged a dinner meeting. Their first date took place on top of a rooftop of a Chicago hotel. The relationship ended at a star-studded party for Grace Jones. Shields was devastated and cried herself to sleep for weeks. 

Shields went on to have a highly-publicized romance with another Michael, MIchael Jackson, and is now married to writer Chris Henchy with two daughters. Michael came out as gay in 1998, although he identified as bisexual during his relationship with Shields. Michael’s conflict with his sexuality led to depression and guilt over having female relationships, which is why he broke up with Shields so abruptly. 

“I had a crush on George Michael. Mom had decorated a denim shirt of mine with ‘WHAM’ in glitter paint and Bedazzles. She glued pins and little pictures of George and surprised me with it to wear to his concert.”

“We got into the limo and headed back to my home in New Jersey. As we were nearing the house, George put up the partition and turned to me. I thought, Oh God–I’m going to have my first time with George Michael in the back of the limo! Forget Catholicism and the book. Forget my mother. God would understand! I gazed at George with puckered lips. He looked deep in my eyes and said, ‘I think we need to take a break. I need to concentrate on my career.’ WHAM!” 

anonymous asked:

Ok, so either the mad hatter is desperate or an equal opportunist cause he kidnapped my two (black) nieces and my nephew while I babysat. Long story short, I flew off the handle and the bat told me to stay put (I didn't) I found the kids before he did I threw a chair at the hatter and the kids basically were krumping on this dudes face lol... batman showed up and took care of his henchies tho 😅😅 #onlyingotham #hetoldmetoneverdothisagain #butalsothatididgood #dontmesswithmybabes

corruptapostasy  asked:

I got a few requests! YV and Bill being all buddy-buddy, in their triangle forms, please. Bill being a shit and stealing Dipper's hat. Mabel and Pyronica being all cutesy and hanging out. Kryptos being all friendly with Soos and Wendy. The Henchies in general being all cutesy and friendly. (Sorry if these are too specific.)

AAaah these ideas are so cute! Bill has lots of gold and Mabel has lots of nail polish

Blue Eyed Babies Pt.3

A/N: Here it is! Sorry it took so long! Btw enjoy the fluff…It’s not going to last. Also please let me know what you guys think!

http://jokersonme.tumblr.com/post/151572549355/blue-eyed-babies

http://jokersonme.tumblr.com/post/151634897570/blue-eyed-babies-pt2


Originally posted by fotokopicibierkek

Originally posted by wonderlandgirlforever

Jay had crept into your room as soon as he heard the shower start. He scanned the room looking for the baby when his eyes fell on Jay’s small form on the bed. She was in some makeshift cage. He silently walked over to her. She ways sleeping, hiding the blue eyes he gave her. He cocked his gun, and aimed it her. That’s when she opened her eyes and looked up at him. He told himself to do it now! Pull the trigger! But for reasons he didn’t understand he lowered the gun in his hand. He stared at her. And she stared at him. The corner of her lips turned up in what he thought was a smile. He didn’t smile at her instead he narrowed his eyes. Why couldn’t he just get rid of her? Maybe he wasn’t as crazy as he and everyone thought. Maybe deep down his paternal instincts were coming out to play. Maybe just maybe he wanted them too. He saw no fear in her eyes. Her eyes were his eyes and he found that very amusing. Then out of nowhere she began to cry. J panicked he hadn’t done anything to her. God, that sound was annoying. How do you make a baby be quiet? He looked down at the gun in his hand, no, no, he thought. Instead he pressed his index finger to her lips. “If you quit making them awful noises, i’ll buy you whatever you want.” He purred out.

She latched onto his finger with her mouth as a tiny little hand came to wrap around it. She was so small, it didn’t even close around his finger completely. He heard the bathroom door open and he quickly yanked his hand away from her. She stared up at him again, as he stared back down at her.

You entered the room with your long wet hair glistening down your back, and the body that J enjoyed a little too much, wrapped in a fluffy towel.

“What are you doing?” You asked J, unable to
keep the nervousness out of your voice.

“Your goddamn job.” He growled.

“Unlike some people here I have work to do, and that’s damn near impossible when there’s crying going on.”

He gestured to the baby with his gun, sneakily putting the safety on without you noticing. If he was being honest it was the first time the gun had ever been in that mode.

“She is probably hungry, I will take care of her. Sorry.” You said, while bowing your head and making your way towards Jay.

The Joker didn’t mean to snap at you, he couldn’t understand what he was feeling, and that caused him to have mood swings. He wanted to shoot you in the head for causing him to feel things he couldn’t even describe.

“You two are going to be here a while… until I decide what to do with you. But for the time being, get comfortable.”

“Okay.” You said while slipping past him and snatching Jay up in your arms.

“But-”

“What?” he growled.

“It’s just that, i’ll need some stuff for me and Jay from my place.”

He rubbed his chin, “Huh I see. You go get changed and i’ll take you there myself.”

“But what about Jay? And your uh work?”

“Don’t want to spend time with your baby daddy eh? HAHAHA!”

You didn’t answer.

“Well dolly I’ll have one, of my henchies who has kids watch her. Trust me they won’t harm a hair on her head. Now get a move on.” He said while slapping your ass and exiting the room.

You feed Jay, and put the change of clothes from frost on. They were white skinny jeans, and purple long sleeve shirt. You wrapped Jay up in the soft throw that was lying on the bed, and made your way out of the door. You crept down the stairs into the large living room where J and all his men were.

“Ah ready to go?”

“Yes.” you said hesitantly really not wanting to leave Jay.

“This my dear is Jackson. He’ll be looking after Jay for us.” He said while yanking a tall henchmen up from the couch.

“Don’t worry ma’ma. I’ve gotten 4 of them at home, i’ll look after her.”

You nodded at him, while placing Jay in his arm. You kissed her forehead when you felt J pulling you away.

“Come on beautiful, I don’t got all day.”

And with one last fleeting glance you followed J out of the mansion and into the purple lamborghini.

You were speeding down the streets of Gotham J had his hand placed on your thigh.
Neither of you said a word to each other. Other then when giving him directions to your house. Once you arrived J illegally parked, and you both hopped out of the car. You made your way up to your apartment, unlocking the door. You felt nervous about J seeing where you lived for some reason. You opened the door, and it felt nice to be home. Everything was clean and how you left it, except for a thin layer of dust starting to settle on your wood furniture. You set your keys on the entrance table, and looked at J.
He was darkening in your door way.

“Uh make yourself at home, i’ll hurry and pack everything.”

With that you made your way to Jay’s nursery. You had painted the walls a light purple when you found out she was a girl. Her crib and changing were white, along with the faux fur rug that covered most of the hardwood floor. You began by grabbing her diaper bag and stuffing it to the top with everything you would need. Next you packed up her clothes blankets and a couple stuffed animals. You then made your way to the bathroom, grabbing her shampoo and baby lotion.

You heard a loud crash of what sounded like glass breaking from the living room, but chose to ignore it. You continued on, packing up all of your beauty supplies. You then made your way to your bedroom and quickly placed your handgun at the bottom of your suitcase, quickly covering it with clothes. You looked over your shoulder making sure J wasn’t around as you scribbled something on notepad.

B,

Jay and I are with The Joker.

Send help!

-Y/N

You quickly placed the note in your nightstand, you knew your boss was a thorough man and wouldn’t miss it.

“Put these in the yes pile” J said causing you to whirl around at look at him.

He was holding up a pair of red lace panties, you hadn’t ever heard him come in.

“Can I have those please?” You asked, while trying to act natural.

“What do I get in return?” He asked, while rubbing the fabric against his cheek.

“Nothing, they weren’t even yours in the first place.”

You tried to snatch them from his hands. But he was too quick and raised them above your head.

“Jump!” He laughed.

You stretched your arm above your head and leapt into the air. It was no use he was to tall.
He began laughing even harder at your attempt. Causing you to start laughing as well. Soon your were booth leaning against each other for support your stomach’s aching. Then suddenly you both stopped.

You realized how close you were to him. His smell wafted over you, that was what had gotten you into bed with him the first time. You shook your head and went to pull away. But his grip tightened on you. He you looked into his eyes, once again becoming consumed by his stare. He licked his lips, before placing them on yours. Slowly he moved on arm to wrap around the small of your back, as the other tangled itself in your hair. And then you gave in and began kissing him back.

A half hour later in a whirl of clothes and skin you were lying on your bed, naked and wrapped in his comforting grip.

“Nothing’s gonna hurt you, i’ll see to that. I am going to protect you from now on. You’re mine now, both of you.” He said breaking the silence.

“Are you sure J? I don’t want you to feel any obligation to me or Jay.”

“I am not doing it because I feel obligated doll face. Believe it or not, i’m doing it because I want to.”

You felt tears beginning to prick your eyes. In all your life you had never felt so safe, and secure then when he was making that promise to you. It was a little paradoxical. The most dangerous man in Gotham, made you feel like the safest woman in the world.

“Alright enough of that chit chat.” He said while getting out of bed and redressing himself.

“Let’s finish packing.”

He started throwing clothes into your bag, and by clothes you meant all your lingerie.

“These are fine, but the rest of your wardrobe will need a update. And you won’t need this.” He said while pulling out the gun you had hidden in there.

You bit your lip and stared up at him, scared for what his reaction might be.

“Don’t worry doll I’m not mad. I appreciate the precaution.”

You gave him a small smile, and put your clothes back.

“I’ll go grab Jay’s stuff.” You said.

Making your way past him, when he grabbed your arm tightly.

“I might have let it slide this time, but if you fuck around with me again. There will consequences.” And with that he released you.

You made your way back to jay’s nursery when something occurred to you.

“J?” You yelled out.

“You called?” He said popping his green head through the door, as his eyes scanned around the nursery.

“Since me and J are staying with you from now on. She’ll need uh a crib along with some other larger things that I don’t think will fit in your car.”

“Already taken care of.” He said as he picked up a stuffed clown, while raising his nonexistent eyebrows.

“What?” You asked, shrugging your shoulders.
“I am a sucker for clowns.” You finished, throwing a wink at him.

“And what do you mean you have it taken care of?”

“If I told you, then it wouldn’t be a surprise doll.” He said with a large grin.

“Let’s go darling.”

He grabbed Jays bag and threw it over his shoulder along with yours. So the muscles aren’t just for show you thought to yourself with a smirk.
You followed him back down the hallway when you saw your coffee pot shattered all over the floor.

“What happened?”

“I couldn’t get it to work.”

“So you broke it?”

“Yes?”

You laughed out loud

“You’re quite the character you know that?”

“It’s been said to me once or twice.” He quipped.

An hour later you were back at J’s mansion, with little Jay feed, freshly bathed and quietly sleeping in your arms. You were sitting on the large leather couch watching tv. Once you and J had gotten home he disappeared. You were ordered to stay downstairs. Every now and then would hear J yelling at his henchmen as they ran around up stairs doing god knows what.

“Eh hem.” J cleared his throat as he walked in front of you, blocking the tv.

“Your surprise is ready.”

He was in his sweat pants shirtless, his hair was disheveled and he looked a little out of shorts.
“If you will follow me milady!” He said in a mock British accent.

“And where are we going good sir?” You asked playing along while standing up with Jay in your arms.

“You’ll see so enough.”

He lead you up the stairs to the bedroom where you had been staying. Before he opened the door he told you to close your eyes. You did as told. You heard the door open and then felt his hands cover your eyes.

“Just to be sure you don’t cheat, now walk forward.”

Once again you did as you were told.

“Ready?” He purred in your ear as he gave it a small bite.

“Yes.”

“Okay, open!” He said while removing his hands from your face.

“Ohhh” you gasped when you opened your eyes.

“J! It’s incredible!”

He had turned the bedroom into a nursery. There was a large silver crib where the bed use to be. It was gorgeous with pleated ends and a large crown above it that drapes fell down from. The walls had been painted a soft creamy white. There was changing table on the wall next to it. It was placed under a window that overlooked Gotham. The other wall had shelves that were stocked with every teddy bear and toy know to man. You caught a glimpse into the walk in closet to see it overflowing with baby clothes. In the middle of the room there was a large polar bear skin rug.

You turned around to face J his eyes already on yours.

“Is this what the news was talking about when they said a IKEA was robbed?” You joked, trying to keep the tears in your eyes from escaping.

J beamed at you. “They forgot to mention the Toy’s R US. Jackson had a lot of say in where to hit.”

“Thank you.” You said sincerely.

He waved you off with his hand,

“I figured if I am going to do this whole parenting thing. I might as well do it right. Bedsides I did promise I’d buy her whatever she wants.”

You smiled at him, “Would you like to put her in the crib?” You asked nodding your head at Jay’s sleeping form in your arms.

J felt shocked unsure of what to do.
He was about to say no when,

“It’s alright, go on take her.” You said to him, practically forcing her into his arms.

“Make sure you support her head.” You said while moving his arm under her little skull.

“She’s so tiny.” He said in awe, as he held his little girl for the first time.

And boy was he right, she did look tiny in his huge embrace.

You made your way over to the crib, J quietly trailing behind you never taking his eyes off her.
He ever so gently and ever so slowly laid her down in the crib. You both started down at her smiles etched on your faces.

“She looks just like you. Ya know?” He whispered to you.

“Except for her eyes.” You cooed, “She has her fathers eyes.”

“Where will I sleep now?” You asked quietly.

“With me.” He replied, eyes locking onto yours.

He reached for your hand and you both made your way out of the nursery to his bedroom. Falling asleep in his arms that night felt nice. It all felt so nice, having your happy makeshift little family together.

But you knew it wouldn’t last. It never did.


Tagged: @sexyprincesskiki, @hanaibae, @laufeysons,

Daddy Issues

Can you do an imagine were your the jokes daughter and you have a boyfriend and he goes through your phone and finds out.

A/N: Here it is, I hope it’s what you wanted!

“Stop.” You said to your boyfriend James as he was littered kisses down your neck.

He immediately stopped, his body hovering over yours.

“What is it?” He asked looking down at you.

“Get on the ground now.” You said, shoving him off you.

He quickly did as told laying on the side of your bed opposite of the door that had just banged open. Your father was never one to knock. He stalked into your room, as you tried to nonchalantly make up self, look as if you hadn’t had someone’s tongue down your throat 5 seconds ago.

“What’s up?” You said, putting on your sickly innocent voice.

“It seems I’ve made your mother mad…surprise surprise. And I need your help deary.”

“Well what’d you do to her?” You asked sliding off the bed to draw him away from James.

“I might have started seeing a new psychiatrist.”

“Oh you didn't…” you said, knowing how upset your mom would be over this. You know, since she is a psychiatrist herself… or was. Before she became Harley Quinn.

“Oh but I did… any ways I am headed out to rob a jewelry store to make it up to her hopefully. But I seem to be missing on of my hencies. But that’s not the point, I was hoping you’d distract your mother for me while I’m gone. Don’t want her to think I’m off the with psychiatrist huh? HAHA!”

“No problem, I’ll go ask her to freshen up the color on my tips.” You said while twirling the fading blue ends of your hair.

“Knew I could count on ya deary.” The joker said while turning on his heels and exiting the room.

You quickly shut the door, and looked over to see James standing up.

“You better get outta here. I’m pretty sure you’re the missing henchie my dad was talking about. Good, thing he likes how reckless you are, else he’d of shot you long ago for always bein late.”

James made his way around the bed and scooped you up in a hug twirling you around.

“You’re as clever as the devil and as twice as pretty.” He said while placing a kiss on your lips.

“Well I am his daughter.” You quipped.

An hour later you were chatting away with your mom in her bathroom as she recolored the ends of your (Y/HC) blue. When your mom was in the middle of her rant about your dad. You snuck a quick text to James, telling him to steal you something pretty.

Two hours later you were curling your freshly dyed hair when you heard the front door bang open.

“Y/N!!” You heard your father yell out.

You body instantly froze, your hands beginning to clam up. The tears started prickling behind your eyes as your anxiety started to take over. Your father was a very scary man when he wasn’t angry. And here you were the direct object of his anger. You silently moved out of your bedroom towards where you knew your father to be.
As you rounded the corner you saw him sitting very calmly in his large leather chair. He his legs were crossed and his hands resting on his knees. A large smile was plastered to his face.

“Have a seat deary.” He said, lifting his hand and gesturing for you to sit on the couch to his right

You did as told, quietly sitting down. Clasping your hands to keep them from shaking.

“What’s goin on puddin?” You mother called from the balcony of the stairs.

“Harles, come on down here. Our little girly has been keepin secrets from us.” He said to her, never taking his eyes off you.

Once your mother was sitting on the arm rest of his chair did he speak again.

“So yer over me hun?” He asked.

“What?” You replied not following a word.

“I asked if you were over me. You see I remember a time when it was me who you’d ask to steal pretty things for you.”

Your heart skipped a beat, as you wrapped your mind around what your father was saying.

“Where is he?”

“Oh don’t worry about him deary, he’s out with the boys.”

“Please, don’t hurt him?”

“Don’t beg me!” He yelled, jumping to his feet knocking your mom off the arm rest.

“You thought you were sneaky huh? Thought I wouldn’t notice the look on that boys face when you’re around? Though I wouldn’t do my investigating? Thought I wouldn’t look at his phone when it kept goin off eh??” He purred, while slowly kneeling in front of you.

He took your hands in his, closing his pale ones over yours to cease the shaking.

“Now, you know I don’t like my little girly to be scared of me. But I also don’t like my little girl sneakin around with my men either.”

He stared at you. His bright blue eyes staring into your Y/EC ones that had tears streaming down them. You hated the mind games he’d loved to play. Here he was his body calm but his words were like venom. Leaving you confused on how to act.

“I’m sorry.” You said, taking a deep breath to steady your tears.

He didn’t answer, just kept staring.

“Well an apology has always been good enough for me, what say you puddin.” Your mom said, obviously trying to defuse the tension.

He stood up, pressing his hands against your knees to gain leverage.

“I say…” he started.

He moved to stand behind Harley, massaging her shoulders.

“I say that I accept your apology. But the question remains on what to do with that boy.”

He had a glint in his eyes when he spoke. An all too familiar glint, that appeared only when your fathers heart was set on killing someone.

hollywoodreporter.com
Will Ferrell Launches Female-Focused Film and TV Production Company

Gary Sanchez Productions, the 7-year-old film and television production company formed by Will Ferrell, Adam McKay and Chris Henchy, has formed a new female-driven division. Dubbed Gloria Sanchez Productions, the venture will focus on creating female-led film and TV projects and will be headed up by Jessica Elbaum, a longtime production executive at Gary Sanchez.

scarredanarchist:

The Joker opens his eyes slowly, being blinded by the bright hospital room lights at first but then looks around the room, spotting Hannah. 
“Ha?… w— w h a t happened?…” He asks, looking tired. This is when he notices the hospital gown he’s in “w h y am I wearing this…? w h y am i here…?”.
He groans in pain before he lies back down.

Hannah let out a sigh of relief, which was really more of a laugh of relief.

“Oh thank God, I was afraid ya’ weren’t gonna wake up.” She ran her thumb over the top of his hand, for she had been holding it since the doctors put him in the bed. “Well uh…we were out, ya’ had this plan ya’ wouldn’t tell me ‘bout so I jus’ went with it and Batman came outta’ nowhere and hit cha’ pretty hard. Usually ya’ jus’ get up and continue what cha’ went there ta’ do but ya’ weren’t movin’ so I got worried. I made the henchies who tagged along call an ambulance and you were brought here.”

“A’ course I wasn’t gonna let the docta’s be alone with you 'cause I didn’t know what they’d do so I lied a bit and said I was family. So fa’ the time span that I’m in here, I’m yer’ unda'appreciated daughter who yelled at lots a’ docta’s ta’ keep the makeup on that pretty lil’ face a’ yer’s. Yer’ welcome fa’ that, by the way. They wanted ta’ take it all off so they could see if there was any damage done ta’ yer’ face that the makeup might be hidin’ or ta’ see if they could indentify you and see yer’ past medical history. I wouldn’t let 'em though, I knew you’d be upset if they did somethin’ like that.”

She smiled slightly, “How ya’ feelin’, darlin’? Head still hurt?”