that adhd feel
Man, using ritalin for school and work is so good and helpful for being awake and focused and… yanno, able to process everything going on around me.
But using ritalin at home sitting at my computer is occasionally just counter-productive, cause I get SO pumped and energised and alert, that I want to do at least five different things that I’ve wanted to get to.
Like, it may make it easier to take initiative, and easier to focus without getting sidetracked when motivated. But man, when I can’t decide on what to do, I sit here bouncing and trying to do all the different things at the same time.
Especially because I feel like I should probably focus on schoolwork, but I WANT to do nerdy fandom things.
Turns out the ability to focus and take initiative doesn’t actually give me that much more discipline. The procrastination is still strong with me. Probably because I still have that “perfectionist” and “terrified of failure/mediocrity” thing.
Granted, that’s still better than doing absolutely nothing except mindlessly browse the internet, but still. Now I have to deal with tense muscles.