help this musical is ruining me


Local Man Ruins Everything™ 

Things I Didn’t Know Were Symptoms of C-PTSD
  • Getting overwhelmed in crowds
  • Getting upset or angry at a loud alarm
  • Ordinary nightmares (that have nothing to do with the circumstances, just stupid nightmares much more often than the average person)
  • Getting sharp pains in your back/neck/collarbones that make it hard to breathe (due to hypervigilance/constant high anxiety)
  • Learning that “high anxiety” does not mean “generalized anxiety” like other people have with panic attacks and not feeling that they can accomplish thing. PTSD anxiety just means this frenetic energy that makes you want to talk/think/do things (even as an introvert) to avoid stopping.
  • Feeling constantly bored like you have to chase after something, even if you’re just at home: I spend hours on tumblr, pinterest, watching tv, reading books, making art, never just laying there alone…because if you stop…the darkness is there
  • Thinking up stories before bed. This is a symptom of high anxiety because you’re trying to calm down and fall asleep in a “safe world” where people are looking out for you and caring for you.
  • Trouble falling asleep (which is distinct from insomnia) because turning off electronics etc. doesn’t help since your heartrate/fight or flight response is engaged
  • Periods of racing heart (mine has gotten to 120bpm for five hours) that make you feel like you’re waiting for something to happen
  • Exaggerated startle response. When I was a kid I used to hide behind corners to surprise my sisters. Two years ago my friend hid under my desk to scare me. I literally screamed, fell out of the chair, and started crying. She was laughing because she thought the joke went well, and then got concerned because I kept crying.
  • Purposefully “tanking” a bad day with sad music/tv/movies/books because it “was already ruined anyway”
  • Aries: i lost my VIRGINITY how do i find it?!
  • Taurus:
  • Gemini: easy ways to become instagram famous
  • Cancer: Does crying burn calories?
  • Leo: how to make a lot of money without going to college
  • Virgo: How does one make friends?
  • Libra: Is dabbing still cool
  • Scorpio: when will the purge take place
  • Sagittarius: list of useless facts
  • Capricorn: 1 hour of chill classical music
  • Aquarius: is it possible to drown yourself by drinking too much water
  • Pisces: all these retrogrades are ruining my life HELP!!
some notes on dear chill heathers or whatever it is

Please, don’t let what happened to Hamilton happen to these musicals, most specifically, Dear Evan Hansen. Like many other people, I was able to see myself in all of the DEH characters. I’ve never seen a more accurate depiction of mental illness and the realities that people with mental illnesses face on a daily basis. DEH has become a voice for so many people, a message to keep pushing for just one more day because there are so many people that care. Don’t let Dear Evan Hansen get lost to people who don’t understand how important these messages are. It breaks my heart to see this happen to a show that has been such a light for me in so many dark places. Dear Evan Hansen helped me realize that there are other people who feel the way I do, and that I am not alone. And I don’t want to be forced to abandon this piece of art just because the “cringey” side of tumblr decided to ruin it. So please, learn from superwholock. Don’t let this happen again. 


Yessir, That’s Our Baby - S8 E15

“Heather McNamara did nothing wrong” right she just bullied tons of people, helped humiliate Martha, betrayed Veronica by spreading awful rumors about her that ruined her reputation, and, oh yeah, tricked Veronica into almost getting raped? but its okay because she was just being Pressured™ and she was Sad™ the whole time so it’s fine

a few witchy tips

•collect salt packets from restaurants/cafes. you can do so much with these things
•set up a cleansing and charging station. arrange crystals in a pattern that draws energy out of an object, put out a bowl of salt & various herbs, have a bottle of (moon) water at the ready, or whatever cleansing method you prefer. this way if you ever need to get clogged up or negative energy out of a crystal, pendulum, or any object, you can quickly cleanse it and charge it with positive energy.
•if you practice astrology, have a folder in your notes app with friends & families star signs or birth charts for easy access
•for those who wear bra’s or bralettes, put a salt packet in the left of your bra and switch it out at the end of the day. having the salt close to your heart all day will aid in emotional cleansing, so its great for a witch with mental illness or anxiety, or getting over someone. doing this everyday has helped me SO much. its so clever.
•draw or paint any sigils/ruins/witchy symbols on the soles of your shoes or anywhere else on your shoe (or draw sigils onto tape if u don’t want to draw on your shoe). the dirt & water coming into contact with your shoe will charge the sigils and send the energy out into the world and into the wearer, and the kinetic energy from walking and running will charge the sigil aswell. grounding sigils will work particularly well for this tip.
•save binural beats, meditation music, or chakra balancing music onto your phone and use it as an aid to meditate on the bus, train, school, or work.

Do you guys know what’s absolutely heartbreaking about listening to the Hamilton soundtrack on shuffle? When the song “Helpless” comes on and you can’t help but feel overfilled with love for Hamliza, but then “Burn” comes on. Whenever this happens, I feel like I want to cry because it’s the beginning of their happy relationship, then all of the sudden everything is ruined. Why does Hamilton do this to me?!?!


Shawn Mendes x Reader

Word count: 1,020

MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING: panic attacks/anxiety - PLEASE do not read if you think this may cause you to trigger from either of these. I am here to talk if anyone needs any comfort or support for them as well.

A/N: Anon requested Shawn having an attack on stage and Y/N being experienced with them and helping him out.


Shawn’s P.O.V.

I begin to strum my guitar, feeling waves of musical vibrations running through my body. The atmosphere right now, in this stadium, is incredible - something I’ve never experienced before. If I’m being honest, it frightens me a little but I know that when everyone sings along, everything will be fine. Y/N smashed it with her opening act so the crowd has already been sending me amazing vibes ever since I stepped foot on this stage.

Strumming the chords to Ruin, my hands are shaking a little bit but I know that this song always gets to me physically. I always get lost in the song. When my voice comes out shaky, I cringe a little bit, hoping everyone didn’t think it was as bad as it sounded in my head. It’s when I completely stuff up the next line by stuttering that my lungs feel like they’re being squished together. “I-,” I take a huge breath before continuing, “I… I just have to go - I’ll b-be back.” I say before rushing off stage, my legs feeling awfully weak. I remove my guitar from my body with all of the strength I have left. Y/N rushes up to me, grabbing my shoulders and steadying me slightly. “Shawn! Shawn! Breathe, just breathe.” She says to me as the floor seems as if it will dissipate any second now.

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The House of Beasts, Part 1

Here is my official first chapter for the House of Beasts!

Summary: Prythian University, the grounds where frat houses wage wars and throw the best parties yet. Feyre, an art student and girlfriend to the Head of House of the Spring House, discovers secrets everyone’s been keeping from her for the last year and a half. 

An ACOTAR/ACOMAF AU, which begins as Feylin then evolves into Feysand. Begins as ACOTAR, includes AU of Under the Mountain, but will focus more on Acomaf. 

Word Count: 2038 words

Once again, thank you all for withholding any hate and supplying only constructive criticism (I really need it!) and sending any requests, suggestions, etc.  

Disclaimer: All characters and some direct and or modified quotes belong to Sarah J Maas, as well as some of the plot points. I take no credit for them whatsoever

Part 1: Parties

I looked across the lush grounds of Prythian University, my cotton robe tucked tightly around the curves of my figure, and I sighed at the wonderfully gorgeous campus that swept across my view. Students walked along, talking together, backpacks strung over their shoulders and heavy books bound to their arms. Autumn kissed the trees that dotted the grounds, leaves collecting within the tracks of students’ footprints. The fall air caressed my skin blissfully and I closed my eyes.

It had been 6 months since I’d moved into Spring House. The six happiest months of my existence, probably.

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I Love You Baby |Bad Boy Jungkook X You|

  • Everything started at the party you shouldn’t be at.
  • ‘Ugly and dumb. You sure we haven’t dated?’
  • ‘Dude get the fuck away from me, I don’t even know you.’ you shoved him away.
  • ‘Aren’t you violent, and bitter, and ugly inside and out’
  • ‘You are pain in my ass right now.’
  • ‘Love your ass btw.’ he smirked.
  • Next day he sat behind you. ‘how’s my princess doing?’
  • ‘I’m just going to ignore your stubborn ass.’
  • ‘You can try, but you’re gonna miss me babe~’
  • ‘Fuck you.’
  • ‘Maybe next time.’
  • ‘Just shut up!’
  • ‘Watch your mouth princess.’
  • He liked talking to you, because usually girls were too shy or too scared to talk to him like you did. But others would start rumors about you two, if he continued approaching you. So he started to text you every day.
  • He was an asshole and creepy at first like
  • ‘You don’t look good with that jacket, take it off.’
  • ‘Stop being a creep.’
  • His piercing eyes staring at you, smirk playing on his face.
  • When you didn’t want to go to his party, he would use your friend. who was in love with him.
  • ‘Jungkookie asked me to come, so we have to go!’ she gasped dramatically, when your said ‘no’. ‘I cant say no to him.But I will do something stupid , if you won’t be with me.’
  • He would text you ‘You lose.’ after your friend finally made you say ‘yes’.
  • ‘You sly little fuck.’ you answering him.
  • Him getting mad when other boys flirt with you.
  • ‘Get the fuck away from (Y/N), right now.’Possessive af even though you two aren’t even dating.
  • ‘Oh so you actually know my name.’
  • ‘That’s it you done bitching?’
  • ‘That was just a warm up asshole.’
  • Him texting you at night.
  • ‘You are worse than nicotine~.’
  • ‘It’s two in the fucking morning jungkook and you are listening to ‘panic! at the disco’ right now’
  • ‘I never met such an emotionless girl like you.It’s scary and kind of hot at the same time.’
  • ‘Are you flirting with me?’
  • ‘I’m fucking trying to.’
  • Jungkook trying to make you go on a date with with him.
  • ‘I don’t know if I like him or I want to punch him in the face.’
  • Your friend was suspicious about you two. But after Jungkook’s crazy move, made her believe her that he had feelings for you. She’s cool with it, bc she knows that they wouldn’t even be together.
  • Jungkook heard that you liked the movie ‘10 things I hate about you.’ so he decided to surprise you.
  • Him singing  ‘ I Love You Baby’ , when you have P.E. his friend Jimin and Taehyung helping him out. They made school orchestra play music, when you were just standing there with jungshook face.
  • He got detention and you helped him. You were hanging out with him all day, doing stupid things together.
  • ‘I’m afraid I’ll ruin you.’ he is serious.
  • ‘You’re not that special kook.’ you ruining the ‘moment’.
  • Jungkook being really drunk and talking nonsense.
  • ‘I think I love you.’
  • ‘Don’t do that to yourself.’
  • ‘Why are you saying that? Is loving you THAT bad?’
  • ‘You don’t mean that, it’s just a game to you.’
  • ‘I wouldn’t hang out with one girl this long if she wasn’t special to me. I’m a mess and please let me be your mess.’
  • *Forehead Kisses* “I love you too pretty boy, but I don’t think your a mess. You’re just a bunny trying to be a bad wolf.’ this nickname annoyed him usually, but now he was just staring at you with wide eyes. ‘And also that was lame way to convince me that you like me.’
  • ‘You liked that I sang for you?’ he showed you his cute smile.
  • ‘Oh shut up!..Yeah I did…’ you whispered the last part and he kissed you, smirking against your lips.
  • ‘I knew it, that you my princess would love it. Don’t call me bunny again. Do I look like a rabbit to you? or you want me to show you what I really am?’ he said with teasing smile.
  • ‘You’re still annoying…’
  • ‘Only for you~’he buried his face in your chest still smiling.

Originally posted by bapsae-monsta

Frat!Mendes Part ✌🏼

lmao remember how i said i was going to get this out like a week ago lololololol my bad here u go enjoy

part 1

“Shawn, c’mon, you know this. You just use an ICE chart to find the equilibrium concentrations and then plug them into the solubility product constant equation doing products on top and reactants on the bottom, raising the concentrations to their corresponding stoichiometric coefficients from the balanced equation—it’s simple.”

Shawn stares at you with furrowed eyebrows and his jaw hanging to the floor for a solid thirty seconds before shaking his head in frustration.  “I’m sorry, can you say that again, but this time in English? Jesus, Y/n. We’ve been at this for days, none of it is making any sense.”

You let out a laugh and get up to move to his side of the table so that you can show him what you mean. You seat yourself in the chair next to him but leave a good amount of space between the two of you. He, however, scoots his chair even closer to you.

“So, look, okay, just take the initial concentration of the reactant here and then subtract the given final concentration of the product and—Shawn are you listening?” You look up at him and his eyes are fixed on you and not the papers in front of you.

“Huh?” He says when he registers that you caught him zoned out on you. His cheeks turn a light shade of rosy pink and he turns his attention back to the paper. “Oh, uh, yeah just put the product concentration there and subtract this and… uh…wait.”

A smile forms on your lips and you shake your head at him. “You gotta focus, dude, we’ve only got a few days until the exam!”

“I know!” He spits back defensively, but then the tension in his face softens as he looks back up into your eyes. “I just got…distracted, sorry.”

You feel your face heat up, too, as you realize that the ‘distraction’ he was referring to was you.

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1985. Hell Awaits

is the second album by band Slayer, Released in March.

The band’s previous release, Show No Mercy, became Metal Blade Records’ highest selling release; as a result, producer Brian Slagel desired to release a second Slayer album. To that end, Slagel financed a recording budget (Show No Mercy was paid for by band members) and recruited several experienced producers to help in the studio. Still, Araya later stated the album had poor production quality: “Nowadays, production-wise, it’s so under par. But for what it was at the time, those are amazing records to me. I guess we could go in and redo it. But why ruin it?”

Lyrical themes on Hell Awaits include hell and Satan, as their debut. The intro of the first track “Hell Awaits” played backwards reveals the repeated phrase “join us”. Musically, the album features the band’s most progressive and diverse work compared to their previous releases, and according to Kerry King, he and Jeff Hanneman were very into Mercyful Fate at the time, which then led to the longer and more progressive songs. Defined as “influential to future extreme metal acts,”

Drummer Dave Lombardo, on the other hand, asserts the album was professionally done compared to Show No Mercy: “I didn’t have to overdub the cymbals, and we had a really good engineer.” Lombardo’s favorite song is “At Dawn They Sleep”, “because it was kind of slow and grungy, but then it had that double-bass part at the end.” While recording the track, neither guitarists King or Jeff Hanneman who wrote the lyrics were in the studio—only Araya and Slagel. On reading the lyrics, which featured a misspelled word, Araya sang it as it was spelled, although it’s not a real word.

To promote Hell Awaits, Slayer embarked on the Combat Tour with Venom and Exodus. Exodus guitarist Gary Holt commented, “We immediately bonded with the Slayer guys. It was two bands of friends playing with one band of heroes, you know? We were just star-struck.”

Inside Venom’s tour bus (the first time Slayer had been in one) the band members got drunk with Venom, while listening to Hell Awaits. Araya entered the bus “hammered out of his mind,” according to Lombardo, saying “I gotta take a piss! Where’s the bathroom in this thing?” Venom singer Conrad “Cronos” Lant responded, saying “Right here—right here in my mouth!” Araya took him literally and urinated on his hair. Cronos got up and punched him in the face, the two blamed each other all night, and Araya continued the tour with a black eye. Araya won’t discuss the incident other than saying that he was drunk and it was a very disrespectful thing to do.

Slayer were from the very beginning ahead of the rest, displaying greater innovation and ideas – with Hell Awaits they definitely became unstoppable and completely influential, the fragility of the early records was gone and they defined their attitude and direction, developing and refining their technique, able to make something bigger. Maybe Slagel & his team’s production and engineering job didn’t provide these compositions the power and presence their nature required, if this record was adequately produced as its successor it could’ve been absolutely spectacular but still, that handicap doesn’t deny the energy and greatness of this legendary stuff.

Hell awaits…and you shall join!

       Tom Araya       Jeff Hanneman      Kerry King      Dave Lombardo


1. Wally (iPhone, iPad)
I personally love this app cause it’s easy to use, beautiful to look at, keeps my receipts and isn’t cluttered with useless features. You can divide them into various categories/subcategories, add in your income, see your balance as well as see your spending habits graphed into beautiful pie charts.

2. 30/30 (iPhone, iPad)
This app is mostly intended for study sessions but I use it to keep track of routines, particularly for housework. I tend to procrastinate and dilly-dally when doing laundry/dishes/etc and sometimes I just need to GET IT DONE. You can allot how much time you want to spend, and save these lists/routines for future use. 

3. IFTTT (iPhone, iPad)
IFTTT stands for If This, Then That and you can use it for ANYTHING. Statements are called “recipes” and allow for a more productive use of your time by eliminating routine actions. I currently use “If raining tomorrow, then remind me today to bring an umbrella” and “If tagged in Facebook photo, then save in iOS Photos”. Alternatively, you can use it to automatically transfer tagged screenshots/notes/etc to dropbox/google drive/etc. 

4. Evernote (iPhone, iPad, Macbook)
I think everyone knows what Evernote is. It has a ton of features including journals, notes, lists, whatever you want. I use it to keep my 2015 goals and lists (books to read, movies to watch, music to get, gift ideas, recipes to try and my bucket list). How does it make me a better student? I no longer waste free time thinking about what to watch, where to eat, or things to do. I get more things done that I’ve always wanted to do and can therefore appreciate when it’s time to get back to work.

5. Grades 3 (iPhone)
Also self-explanatory! It helps you keep track of how each of your evaluations are affecting your final mark. Sometimes it’s hard to see how a 5% quiz improves/ruins your grade. I found myself 10X more motivated after using this app cause you can see just how much better you can do.

6. Inkflow Visual Notebook (iPad)
I just recently discovered this and it is THE BEST. As a human bio major in my undergrad, I drew out flowcharts ALL THE TIME. The problem was that I’d run out of space or need to add a new molecule in between, and my OCD would hit the fan. This app allows you to take a photo of your work, but only scans the pencil/pen part, and therefore seamlessly fits in with the rest of your document. You can then erase, select, add and move around different components of the flowchart/note/picture/etc.

7. Flashcards+ (iPhone, iPad, Macbook, Windows)
This is pretty self-explanatory! What I liked about this is that I was able to test myself while walking to places in the freezing -30 degrees Celsius weather in Toronto (which I wouldn’t be able to do with physical flashcards). Not to mention it saves so much time and paper, and you can easily share them with others.

8. Duolingo (iPhone, iPad)
Learning a new language keeps your head sharp and resume competitive for this increasingly globalized world. I’m currently learning German and this app makes it super easy and fun! I started last week doing 15 minutes every day and I have already had a full (simple) conversation with my German friend - it’s that good!

9. Circle of 6 (iPhone)
As newly independent adults, we need to organize our SAFETY. This app allows you to choose 6 people to send an emergency text to with your details and location at the click of a button (as well as an “I’m okay but thanks” message once the crisis is averted).

10. SAM (iPhone, iPad)
If you’ve ever had anxiety attacks, you’ll understand how much time an attack eats up when you’re trying to be your most productive self. It has a toolbox of methods to calm you down and provides explanations for what you’re feeling. You can even rate each method so you know what works for you.

11. Dashlane (iPhone, iPad, Macbook, Windows)
With all the different social media accounts, email accounts (going on my 4th one now that I’m a Masters student at a new university!), online shopping accounts, bank accounts, etc - it starts to get hard to keep track of all your usernames/passwords AND have strong, individual passwords for all of them. This helps keep track and allows the ability to change ALL your passwords at once if something were to happen to your various accounts.

12. Google Drive (iPhone, iPad, Macbook, Android, Windows)
I can spend a whole blog post talking about this one. I have 100% of my documents saved on google drive on my desktop. This means I have 100% of my documents on my phone, ipad and .. anywhere with an internet connection. You won’t have to lug around a big laptop all the time, AND you can have the peace of mind knowing you have access to important information from literally anywhere in the world. And a bonus - it doesn’t take up any space (except in the cloud!).

13. Zotero (Macbook, Windows)
I love doing research papers but I absolutely hate having to keep track of everything I’ve read. This app allows you to create folders to keep citations for each of your individual reports. Once you’re done, just choose your referencing method and it creates all your bibliography for you at the click of a button!

14. Self Control (Macbook, Windows)
Need to study online but keep feeling tempted to go on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr, Youtube, etc? Put them all on a “Blacklist” on this Self Control app and prevent yourself from being able to access them for a certain amount of time. Even if you delete the app, you still can’t get on those sites until your time is up. LIFE SAVER.

Hopefully these tips have helped you in some way. I’d love to hear about other useful apps! The trick is to have apps that satisfy more than one function, so that you don’t clutter up your devices.


The Organized Minimalist

Sheeran Series || Conor

Miscellaneous masterpost found here

Conor masterpost found here

Word count - 1,336

Summary - The one based off of Gold Rush (Plus - Deluxe Edition).

Conor’s POV

It’s been a week since (Y/N) left. A week since I woke up to a smoke alarm beeping and a note reading I’ll be back in five. Needless to say, I was still waiting. Five minutes, five hours, five days, all passed. What, was I waiting for five weeks? Months? I didn’t even want to think any farther.

Today I had an interview at Capital FM to promote my new album. While I was excited, I couldn’t get my mind off of (Y/N), which was normal now. It was like every second was just one second more of her being away. I didn’t like it. After seven months of being together, I didn’t like a single second spent not with her.

I arrived at the interview and greeted Roman Kemp with a smile. He sat me down, gave me a set of headphones, and before I knew it we were on air. “I’m joined now with Mr. Conor Maynard!” Roman said into the microphone.

“Hey,” I cheered back. “Good to be here.”

We talked about music back and forth as well as any projects Jack and I could be working on. After a bit of talking and a song break, he moved onto a subject I should’ve known I wouldn’t have been able to avoid. “So how’re things with you and the lady?” Roman said with a smile, wiggling his eyebrows. “Things still going smoothly in paradise?”

“Ah well, y’know every relationship has its problems,” I said. “(Y/N) and I aren’t always smooth sailing.”

“Oh man have I hit a sensitive topic?” Roman asked.

“Not really sensitive no, just,” I sighed, not really knowing what to say. “You know, no one really talks about the more challenging sides of the music industry, or any industry I’m sure. We have all these people telling us to do all these things and we have to decide if it’s more important to listen to them or listen to what we know is right.” I paused. “Am I making any sense?”

“Not sure I’m following you mate,” Roman laughed.

Again, I sighed, “Basically I was told by a lot of people to put my job in front of (Y/N), and I chose to listen because it was a lot easier than fighting for it. But in the end it shouldn’t be about what’s easier, it should be about what’s right. And I want to make things right, if that’s okay Roman. Can I do that on here?”

“You can do whatever you want, mate,” Roman said.

“Great,” I said. I sat up a little straighter and took a deep breath and began talking again. “(Y/N), if you’re listening, which I’m pretty sure you are as you’re a massive Roman Kemp fan-” Roman laughed and I continued, “I just want you to hear me out. I should’ve treated you better, I know that now. It didn’t make any sense to make work my highest priority. I mean, work doesn’t treat me like you treat me. And I do the job for the love- because I do love it- and I’m just kind of waiting for the gold rush in the end. And while I’m waiting, it only makes sense that I’ve got someone I love by my side. I don’t know how I could forget that I need you by my side.”

I paused and looked at Roman. “Can I keep going?” I asked.

“We’ve got all the time in the world,” Roman said. “Well, not actually, but you’re doing fine. This is great.”

“Glad you’re profiting off my misery,” I joked. Roman laughed and I smirked and continued. “(Y/N), whenever I talk to any of the boys about this, about how I feel right now, they literally all say the same thing. They talk about how I was in school and I didn’t learn a thing. I hated it. Couldn’t wait to get out. Somehow along the way I figured out that I know how to sing but I don’t know anything other than that. And then they always end with the same damn thing. They say, Maybe you should learn to love her the way you want to be loved.”

I saw someone hold up three fingers and I knew I was running out of time. “(Y/N), I love you,” I said. “I never told you all the things I love about you, or at least I didn’t tell you nearly enough. I don’t have all the time right now, but I just want you to know that I love you. I never told you that I love how you can’t dance to the beat of any song and I love how you like to pretend you know the words to every song on the radio when I know for a fact that you don’t. I love you. I love all of you. And if we can get past this, if you can forgive me, I’m never gonna put my job in front of you again.”

I took a deep breath and Roman and I were both quiet. I could feel all eyes in the studio on me. “Uh,” I stuttered with an awkward laugh, “so yeah, keep an eye out for my album. New music coming really soon. Special project with Jack just around the corner. Lot’s to look forward to. I’m sorry I’ve ruined this interview.” I said the last bit very quickly and almost under my breath, making Roman laugh.

“Hey it’s all good,” he said. “Hope everything works out with your girl. (Y/N), if you’re listening out there, take this guy back. He seems like a proper mess without you.”

“Thanks Roman, great help,” I laughed light-heartedly.

Before I knew it, we were done and I was on an Uber ride back to my flat, ignoring the scolding text messages from my manager saying that I completely ruined the interview and any promotion for my album. I didn’t care. (Y/N) wasn’t answering my calls or my texts. If the only way I could reach her was through a radio interview that there was only a chance she was listening to, I had to try it.

When I got back to my flat, I nearly shit myself as soon as I walked in. There on the couch was (Y/N). I dropped my keys on the counter and walked over to her. She stood up and before she could say anything I wrapped my arms around her and held her close to me. “I’m sorry,” I said immediately, holding her head to my chest. “I’m so sorry. I fucked up big time.”

“Yeah you did,” she mumbled back. When I pulled away I could see a little tear in her eye. I wiped it away just as it trailed down her cheek. “I listened to the interview,” she said.

“I meant every word,” I said.

“Every word?”

In seven months of dating, (Y/N) and I never said I love you. Sure, I thought it was somewhat of an unspoken understanding between the two of us, but neither of us ever confirmed it aloud. “You didn’t really think that after all this time I don’t love you, did you?” I asked, holding her face in my hands. She shrugged, sniffed again, and looked down at her feet.

“You never said,” she whispered. “And then you got more and more distant so I just kind of thought-”

“Hey,” I said, lifting her chin up so she could look at me. “I love you. So much. I’m sorry I never said it before.”

(Y/N)’s cheeks got a little pink and a small smile spread across her lips. “I love you too,” she said. I mirrored her smile and leaned down to press a small kiss to her lips.

“I’m sorry,” I said again. “Like the boys say, I really don’t know anything except how to sing.”

(Y/N) laughed lightly, “Well, I think I can teach you a bit about love if you’d like to learn.”

I smiled, “I’d love to.”

I really hate him..he just disgusts me.

With all the​ passion that I love Rumple for all his human faults and failings I feel the exact opposite for Hook. Probably because Rumple acknowledges his issues and Hook gaslights and tells everyone else that it’s their fault he’s done something.

He’s done absolutely nothing to earn this “hero status”. He isn’t redeemed when he’s still so filled with hate and vengeance.. yet this show and it’s terrible writing keeps insisting that he’s good.
Prove it , don’t just say it every episode to convince us.

He’s dumbed down Emma that I don’t care about her anymore..
And this damn song of his just makes me angry.

What he sings about, Snowing helping him, etc.. none of this is the mark of a good person.

The fact that in current SB he goes to Gold’s shop to again use the heroic method of threats just proves what a useless ass he is.

I wonder if he stops his Honeymoon to go and threaten Gold..

I won’t be watching the musical which is just a filler gimmack of an episode to try and get ratings.

It’s a waste and it centers on 2 people that have ruined the show.. herocrites and non savior Emma and Hook - the epitome of rape culture.

Have I said how much I hate him? Hook has no redeeming qualities and if him singing about revenge and then later going and threatening Gold makes him a good person then I’m happily choosing the dark side.

Hello, Eggs here! I’m the type of person who enjoys writing to music, just to help me sink into the atmosphere. 

I wanted to share some of the playlists I’ve curated and some I’ve found, all of which I listen to while writing/studying. 

I usually keep adding and reorganizing playlists, so if you like what I hear, feel free to check back! You might hear something new. 

Need a quiet soundtrack for quiet thoughts? I keep a pretty chill writing playlist for when I don’t have a particular mood or atmosphere in mind. (link here)

Writing ruins and decrepit catacombs? Or just dread and dark in general? Have this playlist. Don’t mind the name it’s a Bloodborne quote but it is good advice. (link here)

Writing a crime unit hot on the heels of a criminal? Need a gritty, dystopian feel? I found a Ghost In the Shell-esque playlist, perfect for late nights of writing suspense and deception. (link here)

More into movie soundtracks, but still want a pretty chill writing session? Here’s a pretty nifty Spotify playlist appropriately called “Cinematic Chill-out” (link here)

anonymous asked:

Do you have any recommendations about music to write to? Since you already mentioned some?

yeah of course! it might be easier to give me like a specific mood/emotion and i can build a playlist for that but here are some songs that always help me get to that writing place

i need a forest fire- james blake + bon iver
715 creeks- bon iver
where are ü now- ember island
memo- years & years
sophie- bear’s den
first defeat- noah gundersen
crowded places- banks
mother earth- banks
me- the 1975
perfect ruin- kwabs
strange and beautiful- asami zdrenka
in the morning- nao
sleepover- hayley kiyoko
electric- alina baraz + khalid
winterbreak- muna
hero- devon baldwin
f.i.y.e.- social
oceans away (mansionair remix)- arizona
glory- dermot kennedy
boy- san scout
at the time- san scout
ilysb (stripped)- lany
butterfly (prologue mix)- bts

Moonflower: part one

Originally posted by aegeane

Hoseok Soulmate AU

“What the hell Amora?” you question angrily into the phone. “What happened to, you know, getting coffee and spending the day with me, your best friend?” You had planned earlier in the week to have a day out together. A small coffee shop had opened the other month near by, yet you hadn/t had the time to go and check it out. So having your plans cancelled out of the blue like this was frustrating to say the least.

“I’m so so so sorry Y/N, but I totally forgot it was flowering month for me,” she said in a giddy voice. “But you know how much this means to Kevin and I.”

You rolled your eyes at the love-struck girl’s words. Everyone had a birthmark of a colorless flower somewhere on their body. The birthmark acts very similar to the flower that it is projecting, such as mimicking its flowering times. The birthmark is completely unique, matchless to any other of it’s kind. All except for your soulmate. Every petal and marking of your flower is identical to your soulmate. As soon as you meet them, the previously empty outline, is filled with vivid colors. “Oh it’s already that month already,” you said sarcastically. Amora has a rose covering the top of her hand, which had been bloomed to its bright red when she met her lover, Kevin.

“Y/N, you know this is when we met. It was during the rose flowering season and to see are matching flowers, full of color, it.. It was just..” She finished her sentence with a long dramatic sigh. They were so stupidly in love, that it was hard to believe that they were a real couple.

“I know, it’s so important to spend a whole month together. Going out on so many dates that I can hear your wallets crying.” You winced at the thought of how much money those two spent going out on dates. “But you really do have all month to spend time together, can’t you just go to this stupid coffee shop with me,” you begged. “Please, I’ll leave you alone for the rest of the month if you do”

Amora sat in silence on the other line for a moment, debating with herself. “Fine,” she groaned. “Only for a little bit though. I’ll give you no more than a hour.”

You gave yourself a mental high-five for persuading her. You were about to hang up when a quick thought crossed your mind. “Don’t. Bring. Kevin.”

“No promises!” she quipped before hanging up quickly.

Goddammit Amora.

You walked into the cozy cafe, and took in the aesthetics of the place. It had lots of natural light, and bookshelves lining every wall. Your eyes landed on Amora, and her curly haired soulmate beside her. They were sitting in a small corner of the shop, gazing into eachothers’ eyes. It was almost nauseating how in love they were, and you doubted that when you found your soulmate, if ever, that you wouldn’t be that cheesy. No, you hoped you weren’t.

Your friend had only looked up after you called her name three times. “Hey, did you guys order yet?” you asked while pulling out a chair to the table.

“Yup,” Kevin said in his soft voice. His voice had always given off the impression that he was shy, but give him five minutes around you, and he’ll talk your ear off. “We ordered for you as well, you know, to save time so that we,” he glanced over at Amora, “would have more time for our date after this.”

Of course, you thought to yourself. The conversation continued pretty lightly after that. Mainly mindless banter amongst the three of you.

“So you found your apartment Y/N?” Amora questioned.

Finally, a relevant topic. You were moving to Seoul in three months to study further in art, and get a job in animation. “Yeah,” you responded happily. “It’s a cute little place, right near at least three coffee shops. Me, as coffee addict, I’m going to be in heaven.”

“Well, we’ll definitely come in visited,” Kevin jokingly proposed. “Wouldn’t that be fun babe, to go crash at Y/N’s for a month after she moves.” Amora nods excitedly.

“There is no way in hell,” you scoffed, “that I am spending a month with the both of you. One of you sure, but not together.” Having those two love-birds stuck near you all day, every day, for a month? You would die.

“You know what Y/N, you might your soulmate there, then you’ll understand why we’re so like this all the time,” Amora said, shifting the subject.

You couldn’t help but make a face at her. Your birthmark was a moonflower, on right side of your chest, cheesily right over your heart. Moonflowers only bloom at night, and then closes back during the day. Which is cool and all, minus the fact that everyday, your flower is bloomed during the day, then closes at night.

“Amora we all know my flower is broken, and I probably don’t have a soulmate. Either that or they are off dying somewhere.”

“I don’t know Y/N, this might be your chance.”

Sure it is.

One Month Later

Sitting on your bed, you carefully sketched out the line work for the next frame of the animation, when a loud shriek from the other side of the room caused your hand to jerk. “Now what Amora,” you grumbled while calling up the piece of paper that was now ruined.

“BTS. COMEBACK. MUSIC VIDEO.” She sat there gasping dramatically between each word. Amora had been a hardcore fan of them for quite some time, and you always seem to be around when she flips her shit over them. “Oh I’m scared,” she stammered with her finger hovering over the video on her phone screen. “Y/N I can’t do it press it for me!”

You rolled your eyes and plopped down on the floor next to her and tapped on her screen. As the video began, you couldn’t help but smile to yourself. While, you may not be a hardcore fan such as the hyperventilating girl next to you who looked like she might cry, you still enjoyed their music from time to time. At first you thought Amora was crazy for obsessing over seven korean men, especially since she’s found her soulmate, but you get it now. While they are all charming in their own way, one specifically, Hoseok, had made your heart flutter every time his face appeared on screen.

After Amora had caught her breath and, “Collected her feels,” a question popped into my mind. “Do they have their birthmarks?”

“Well duh,” she quipped, “everyone does.” You rolled your eyes at her because, that isn’t what you meant. “If you want to know what they are, your outta luck. They cover them so they can’t be seen.”

“That’s stupid,” you grunted. “How is their soulmate supposed to find them? Also why?” Were they just supposed to find their soulmate by chance, like it’s not always that easy. Do they even want to find them? If not they should just get them tattooed off, even though it’s disapproved of.

“For a few reasons actually, but two main ones really.” Amora sat up while collecting her thoughts. “The first is so that if they have found their soulmate, it can be kept a private matter. You know, they don’t need more hate for finding the love of their life.”

“Okay I get that.” Privacy, that’s understandable. I guess being famous and having someone realize that they really can never be with you would definitely piss at least a few people off. “And the second?”

“The second is kind of messed because it’s happened before,” she sighed. “So basically, they don’t want anyone seeing them because there are some fans who go as far as getting tattoos, trying to identically replicate them, in hopes of like, artificially becoming their soulmate or whatever.”

“That’s fucked up that someone would go that far.” But there really are those people aren’t there. “What about those people’s real soulmates? They would feel like trash I bet.”

“Oh yeah, it makes a giant mess every time,” Amora noted. By the look on her face she was recalling stories of it happening too. “But who knows Y/N, you might be the real deal,” she raved, elbowing you in the side playfully.

Giggling at the thought, you played along, “Yeah sure, then I’ll fall in love with one of the world’s most famous idols.” It was a fun thought, but you knew it was unrealistic, and highly unlikely. “And how would I even meet them or run into them?”

“I don’t know Y/N, just keep your eyes open. One day it’ll just hit ya!”

I’m not amazing at it myself but I have a basic understanding so I’ll try to explain what I know.

Usually I’ll listen to the audio I’m using a few times before actually starting just to get an idea of how long each frame should be etc. Then when I start animating I’ll keep a mirror next to me so I can see the shapes the mouth makes with certain sounds.

You have to do your research and find out how the mouth moves with each different sound, but after that it should be fairly easy.

To demonstrate, I’m going to sketchily animate Justin from the epilogue of 21 Chump Street.

It’s fairly obvious that in this frame he’s making an ‘o’ sound.

When there’s an ‘m’ sound, the mouth closes for a brief second.

After I’ve made all my frames, I’ll put them to the music to see if they look right (scroll back up). Yep, that looks pretty good.

Hope it helps :)

- Alex