help me shine on through

You see I’m trapped in my mind
And I’m going trippy
Oh I don’t think I’ll ever go

You see the walls are so high
That I couldn’t climb them
So I don’t know which way to roll

But I’m stuck in rewind
Oh I’m looking forward
Damn I wish I new what went wrong

My mental got hit
Oh lord please help me pull through

You see the sun seems to shine
When I am not looking
Oh he’s seen the trick every time

My things do get out of hand
Once in a while inside my mental
Hey at least a nigga ain’t die

Hey now when I see what it
I am not lucky
Hey I like to pat my own back

Now it’s a gift and a curse since my birth
I’m in a prison
Oh I’m happy right where I’m at

levi already made his choice

the story might slap him with “SORRY THAT OPTION IS INVALID” in the future but he’s made his personal decision clear, and defended it through opposition.

armin is in super dire straits and eren begs him to hurry up!!! give the serum!! bertolt is right there, a shifter available for eating

it’s the perfect set-up for an injection. erwin is nowhere to be seen– dead for all he knows– but look at him. he’s silent, slow to respond, drawn in dark shadows, obviously unwilling, [edit: now that better scans are out, we see he’s in literal agony about having to do this lmao RIP] & when he FINALLY says “…fine” it’s with the face of a dead man. he DOES NOT WANT TO, but what else is there to do?

then erwin turns up on rescuer recruit’s back and levi is immediately transfixed. he doesn’t just pause in the act of handing the box over but quickly retracts his arm, presses it to his chest while staring very emotionally. at erwin. frozen again but so differently, god i need to breathe

eren goes “earth to captain???” and levi spares him one glance before helping erwin get settled. he checks for erwin’s breath even though the recruit already told everyone he was alive, just injured. he stands, visibly more composed now. he doesn’t even turn back to armin before announcing clearly, strongly, in bold

“the serum will be used on erwin.”

the contrast between that and his prior reluctant “ok” cannot be more stark

of course eren and mikasa are very upset at this! eren gets up in his face but levi replies, again in bold text, he’s going to choose for humanity. after saying at least twice before that erwin, specifically, is needed for humanity. whether his judgement in this is flawed/biased/clouded by feelings, it’s still his judgement

it clearly pains him to say this to the kids but there’s absolutely no indication that he changes his mind. not even the last look he gives mikasa: it’s the sad furrowed brow of a person who knows just how devastating this is for her, not someone coming to a sudden new revelation. their agony affects, but doesn’t sway him

levi chooses erwin, plain and simple. he always has.

I wish I could take away your sad and replace it with all the happiness I have left.. 😔it’s not much.. But at least it’ll mean you aren’t so sad anymore and I’ll get to see my happiness shining through your eyes , and that will help me become somewhat happy again.
If I could give you all my happiness .. I would.
—  I don’t care about my happiness I care about yours, and what’s good is that if you’re happy it’ll make me happy.

11/11/11 Tag


Tagged by @striptaese

Thank you sweetie!!!

Rules: Share 11 Facts about yourself, answer 11 questions by tagger, tag 11 people and ask 11 questions for them.


Facts:

(this is probably going to be super boring…)

1. I have three tattoos and have have/had 12 different piercings so far, my ears also used to be stretched.  
2. I started the first online literary journal at my community college with my creative writing professor.  It was called Wiffles and Burbles.  I don’t even know if it’s still around because that was a long time ago lol…I hope it is though.  
3. I like doing jiu jitsu and weight lifting.  (fuck cardio though)
4. I used to be married but my divorce was seriously the best thing that could have happened.
5. I actually discovered Shinee the year I got divorced and it helped me through a lot.  They were/are the best distraction and source of inspiration.  
6. I know a lot about wine…well more than the average person and I like to volunteer at local wineries and pour at festivals.  (most pay you in bottles of wine)
7. I work in IT/tech support and it’s made me dead inside.
8. I have quite a few phobias.  Spiders, getting sick, doctors/hospitals to name a few.  
9. I have a yellow hatchback named Doug.  (It was named after my fave singer in a band at the time)
10. I’m super forgetful and disorganized.  Which is the worst combination ever.  I also get distracted easily.  I really don’t know how I’ve managed to survive this long.  But I guess I’m doing something right.  /shrugs/
11. I used to brew my own beer.  The last time I did the container that I left the liquid in to ferment exploded in my kitchen.  I came home from work one day and there was beer foam everywhere.  The floor, ceiling, walls, it took days to clean.  And it smelled awful!  

Questions asked by @striptaese


1.  If you could have any pet in the world, what would you want?

A giraffe.  And I’d have my bedroom window built in just at her height so we could have deep face to face conversations with each other before bedtime and I could feed her treats.  

2.  What is your favorite genre to read?

I’m a sucker for paranormal romance.  I love horror and fantasy too…

3.  What is the first thing you look for in a person (as a friend, or as a partner, anything)?

Sense of humor.  If our senses of humor don’t mesh well it’s probably not going to work out.  I have a very dry sense of humor and people tend to get insulted or offended by it.  

4.  What’s your favorite sport? (Even if you don’t like sports, just pick the one that urks you the least)

To watch…soccer and American football.  To play…disc golf!  But I played soccer in school too.  

5.  If you could follow the schedule of one member during the One Fine Day vacation, whose would you follow? (activities-wise, I don’t mean you get to follow the member literally LOL)

I would def go to Thailand.  Hot springs, scuba diving, massage, the food, feeding the monkeys, it was such a chill trip. 

6.  What is one thing you don’t like reading in fanfiction? (I’m just assuming you read them at this point in time. It can be kinks or certain pairings, etc.)

Chicken jokes…clumsy Onew, diva Key, idon’tknowwhatsexis Taemin, Meanho, and cocky Jonghyun.  

7.  What is the earliest memory you can remember?

Accidentally breaking a girl’s fingers in preschool.

8.  Have you ever traveled out of the country solo, or do you ever intend to?

No.  I’m afraid to travel outside of the country alone but I think I may have to get over that because that looks like it’s going to be the only way I’ll get to go to the places I want to.  

9.  What color is the walls of your room?

I rent.  So boring white, but they’re pretty much covered in posters now.  :D

10.  Are you using a laptop or a desktop?

Laptop.

11.  How do you visualize your dream house to be?

An island villa.  With the ocean facing side all windows and an infinity pool right outside.  Palm trees and decorative lanterns will line the sides of the deck.  The inside will be cozy with soft lighting and warm colors but chic minimalistic decor.  I hate clutter.  

My questions:

Favorite snack food.

Favorite song on 1 of 1.  :)  

What time of year do you enjoy most?

If you could give any piece of advice what would it be?

Do you still watch cartoons?  (If so what’s your fave)

If you had to recommend one fanfic what would it be? (assuming you read them)

Favorite smell.

Is the toilet paper roll supposed to go over or under?

If you had the chance to say one thing to your bias, what would it be?

Iced or hot coffee?

Favorite Shinee era.  

I think a lot of the people I would have tagged have already been tagged lol, so if I tag you again, feel free to play again or ignore…and no pressure if you just don’t have time or don’t want to.  I don’t want to bug or annoy anybody :)
I tag: @orgel-ontae @moshiznik @oh-noona @kindredseoul @taebadam @onewjams @hellotweetygirl @jjongs-lubricants @jongtaeluv @trashyjongtae @minhoandthebabes