help i have so many feelings

Newt Scamander Rant

Recently, people have been asking me about fantastic beasts and in complete honesty, I’m absolutely terrified to tell them everything I know. To show them hoe much this story and these Characters mean to me. It’s truly a horrible feeling. I’ve been obsessed with the Harry Potter universe for my entire life, everything about the Wizarding world just makes me feel wonderful but, I’ve definitely been told to “shut up” about it. Every time I want to talk about Newt Scamander, I just know people give me strange looks. Ever since elementary school to even now, I feel constantly judged for loving the Harry Potter world and you know what, it bothers me. Fictional characters have helped me through so much more than my friends or my parents have.

When a character gives you a new outlook on life

Or has a character who is socially awkward like myself and many others

Originally posted by ilvermorny

Or when they make the LEAD emotional and have actual feelings

Originally posted by nonmugglegal

It really makes having anxiety and being a socially awkward person who’s afraid of showing emotion that much easier. Newt obviously has had friendship problems in the past, like me and like him I need to learn to not dwell on the past. Why do people think that people who actually find comfort in someone fictional to be strange? I just don’t understand. These characters make me feel whole. The traits I have are reflected in a character, and they aren’t mocked or embarrassed by said traits. hell yeah I'm going to feel a connection to them. Newton Artemis Fido Scamander is just the kind of person I want to be. He knows he doesn't fit in, He knows others look at him weird, he knows how cruel humans really can be. I want to be able to be okay with all of these things.I want to be okay with people thinking I’m annoying or that i have interests in strange things. His philosophy actually helps me go through my day, every time I start to worry, I remember what he says. These aren’t just some book characters who we forget about when we’re done, These people help shape who we are. It’s not just Newt, different characters help different people and I am sick and tired of feeling ashamed of for loving the people who make me feel happy.So what if i love Newt Scamander, he is literally one of the only reasons i stay alive so if you think that’s stupid, that it’s childish, then go find a character who does make you understand. We all need one. 

I was once a medium-size deal

In the world of fanfiction and fandom life. This was maybe five years ago? Seven? Longer? I don’t really remember. The truth is, I got a bit older and stopped writing fanfictions when my professional life took off in a direction that took all of my time and I had to spend the time I was spending writing on correcting papers and helping my kid with Trigonometry. Okay, that last part was a lie. Like I could do Trigonometry. 

But I ‘casually’ still observe fandoms because I love being a fan. It is fun. I like to disagree with the direction that books and movies take and I love to add to a world where it may have been lacking via fanfictions. It is FUN.

But this Sherlock fandom thing is completely out of control. Seriously. I am worried for the people who are so hugely invested in it. I feel like commenting on many, many sites that these writers should really seek some professional help. That a show’s outcome should never define who you are to the point where you are this massively devastated by either a bad episode or an outcome that you do not agree with. That a show should never define who you are PERIOD. Because a television show, book, or movie is not a social experiment. It isn’t social at all. It is the work of a few writers in a room. It is their vision, right or wrong. Not yours, not ours, not the great collective. You can disagree. Gosh, there isn’t a trilogy out there where the ending doesn’t drive me up the wall. But let me repeat, DO NOT LET THIS DEFINE YOU. You, dear writers of blogs who wanted directions that were never taken, are not the sum of the parts. You are a different answer to the same problem. Stop looking at this as the wrong answer and start looking at it as what it is. Because honestly, Sherlock BBC is really just fanfiction in itself. It isn’t even its own canon. So write your own, read your own. But do me one favor and STOP LOOKING FOR SHERLOCK BBC TO CURE SOMETHING INSIDE OF YOU. That is way too much to put on authors. Authors of anything. They are just people. They wrote the story that they wanted to write. They may be wrong in your mind, but it is still their story. If it has plot holes, write a fanfic to fix them. If your ship didn’t sail, find a story or series or book that makes a ship that you NEED happen. But stop looking to a television show. IT IS UNHEALTHY.

I know that you had time and thought invested in all of this. But please, I am worried about you all like the mother that I am. This isn’t healthy.

(As an aside, remember that a man and man can TRULY love each other and be friends. Women and women can be the same. Many people used to think my best friend and I were lovers. We took no offense, we did everything together and truly loved each other, yet we were not romantically attached nor sexually attracted to one another. Don’t minimalize how important and special those platonic relationships can be by NEEDING them to be romantic. It is just as insulting as a person saying ‘when are you going to get married?????”. If we feel the need to define every relationship in only the ways we see them, especially the need to see romance or sex, we are playing to the same dangerous game we preach against.) 

Peace to you all. If you really don’t feel you will ever get over this as so many are saying, please seek help. Call a hotline, call a real-life friend, close the computer, and breath. It will all be okay. I promise. 

I am going to tag this since no one actually follows me and no one might even read this. I just had to write it. I am too disturbed, and I am getting way too old for this shit.

_

The most beautiful people you’ll ever meet aren’t always the ones who catch your eyes first. No, the most beautiful are the ones that can never be figured out. The one you could talk with for many hours and still have a million things to ask. The people who have mind so lovely and special, you can help but fall in love with them.

There’s a Japanese phrase that I like: ‘koi no yokan’. It doesn’t mean love at first sight. It’s closer to love at second sight. It’s the feeling when you meet someone that you’re going to fall in love with them. Maybe you don’t love them right away, but it’s inevitable that you will.

And in the end, we were all just humans, drunk on the idea that love, only love, could heal our brokenness.

300??!!

Well then guys, we have just hit 300 followers and i swear it has only been a couple of months since we hit 50..
So i just wanted to say thank you❤️

This website and the lovely people in it has helped me get over so many things and i have no idea on why people are so nice to me, because I do literally not deserve it😅💕

Of course there are a couple of people that i feel like deserves a special thank you:

@sdmnandfriends you are amazing, you’re pretty and funny (your nose is not big) and i loved talking to you yesterday even if you completely blanked me by writing 😂❤️
(You’re one of the bestest friends i could ask for)

@sdmntrxsh Hello there lovely☺️ you are so sweet and i love winning over you in all our little games😂 but even more than that i love talking to you, it’s so fun, i have been close to rolling on the floor with laughter way too much i swear😂❤️👵🏼👵🏾

@minizerk-sdmn My Queen and Bar💕 where do i even begin? We are the same person in different bodies and you’re probably the most supportive and helpful person i will ever meet and i do not deserve you at all👑❤️

@kingminiminter first of all: cunt, then i want to tell you how much our conversations mean to me, mostly it’s me on the edge of dying with laughter or drinking coke (I’m not a Coca cola-aholic, stop it)
Anyway love you cunt❤️❤️

@xixsidegirlxix Oh my god Georgie💙 you are one amazing human being and i really hope you know it!! Because you mean so much to me that i can’t even explain😘

@xix-baezinga I know we have only just started talking but you seem so nice and lovely and i hope we can talk even more!☺️

CAH squad: Guys, we need to play again soon!! It’s so fun talking and bantering around with you all!

(If i forgot anyone, tell me please)

Gif Making 101: An Introduction

Alright, so recently a close friend of mine (and honestly my favorite rp partner ever) asked me how I make my gifs, since she wanted to try her hand at making her own. I went searching for the tutorial I originally followed (I knew exactly where to find it, since it was a link for @tasksweekly​‘s gif task), but unfortunately the person deactivated- so I decided to make a tutorial of how I make them on here, to post it instead of just telling her, so I could share the wealth among the rp community. I tried to include as many screenshots as I could to make the process simple to follow, so here we go! If you have any questions, feel free to ask me. I am by no means an expert gif-maker, but I will try my best to answer or help if you run into any issues.

I personally use Photoshop CC 2015, so depending on what version of Photoshop you have, it may look different, but the basics and mechanics of it all should be about the same. As an added note, I definitely recommend starting with a YouTube video, since those will be shorter and easier to get a hang of than an episode of a TV show. Once you’re comfortable with making them, then you can move up to episodes.

I tried to explain everything as thoroughly as I could, even to the point of possibly over-explaining, so I hope this helps anyone who wants to make their own gifs!

Let’s get started, shall we?

Keep reading

why am I doing this

Hey y'all, don’t hate me, but I know I’m my blog I follow back but there’s way too many blogs that I’ve followed and my feed is a mess and it takes me hours to catch up on things I might’ve missed and my notifications have gotten all wonky, so that isn’t really helping either. I feel like a terrible person doing this but I’m going to be going on a huge unfollowing spree soon. Let me make it clear that I AM NOT UNFOLLOWING EVERY SINGLE PERSON. I really just need to clean things up because it’s all too time consuming to go through everything and I miss out on too much and waste too much time. I’m really sorry but I really didn’t want to seem like a horrible person but I don’t know what I can do. I’m sure I’m going to lose a crap ton of followers doing this and I’m really just a terrible person, I know. I tried really hard to find a way out of it because I love and support you all the way you love and support me but it’s gotten beyond overwhelming. I follow over a thousand blogs that are constantly posting and reblogging posts every minute. Each time I refresh my feed I have to scroll through 20ish more posts to find where I missed something. I’m really sorry. I know I’m probably going to regret this but I know most of you will understand. Love and hugs. 💚💚💚

i feel like i am really lucky to have my boyfriend u guys. like my life has been so much better since i met him. he has helped me in so many ways. i feel like after being with him for almost a year, i am more comfortable, more social, more willing to create, more positive. i am a better person today than i was when i met him. and i think i can say the same for him. we have helped each other grow so much and i just can’t wait to keep growing with him for the rest of my life. 

I really appreciate all the kind words that have been sent and people responding to when I asked for some happy news and just.. all the love and support through what I’ve been going through. I’ve gotten a lot of kinda.. vague advice and I know you guys just tried the best you could to help and just messaging me at all helped greatly, then the words also had their impact. I just haven’t been in a right place to reply, especially with so many, my replies… I would feel like it would end up repetitious. Because of this, I’d like to apologize for not replying and hope you understand that it seems very daunting to go back and reply to you all. I’ll be happy to have any convos through pm’s though because I have finally dealt with my feelings and can talk more freely now, but note the details to my problems are actually quite severe. Feel free to talk about not that too though lmao. 

thank you all for understanding and caring! <3 Please don’t think I’ve just ignored you because I didn’t like you or something. 

I have not much time or strength to write everyone back (but I have read every single word), I am so sorry but I wantet to thank you all so much for the kind words and messages I got (anon and not anon) this makes me really happy because I still think it is my fault but your words helped a bit.
Sammy is allright and this counts, my littte boy is sleeping next to me.
You are all so lovely, thank you all really so much for being so supportive.
Thank you all so much for putting strength and time into making me feeling better.
Thank you all so much for accepting me and not judging me.
Please stay the way you are, because you are beautiful, have such a kind souls and warm hearts
It makes me so happy smiling because here are so many lovely people.
I love you all 💕.

anonymous asked:

So i've been doing a lot of research into bpd and i think i may have it but i dont act out, i internalize everything. So i had a question about the "affective instability criteria". I often only feel negative emotions, and i feel like i have a hard time remembering how i felt or how long i felt it for after i feel it, so im not sure if i meet the criteria for this .Could you help me understand it a bit better by maybe explaining what its like for you? Only if you feel comfortable with it though

There is a “sub type” if you will, of BPD that many people believe in called the “quiet borderline” in which the borderline internalizes lots of their symptoms and directs lots of what people see borderlines directing at others at themselves. You might want to look into that!

- admin Scott 

mommy-and-little  asked:

So glad you and your Daddy had a fun day at the park! All of your pictures were so adorable, I must say your blog is by far one of my favorites!

We did have fun! The scary part was riding on his bike to get there and back. That thing feels like a screaming metal death trap and I feel like we’re gonna tip over all the time, plus it’s super loud and sounds like a go-kart xD

I’m so glad you love our blog!

A lot of people have been telling me that our blog has been helping them through some rough times and I’m so happy that we can provide that space.

Idk how many times I’m gonna say it, but I just really appreciate the positivity and kindness from everyone and I’m glad I can help spread the positivity and kindness as well c:

I hope you have a wonderful day 💚
- Luna 🌛

3

“Humans weren’t made to be alone, after all, so I was curious at first, thought you just might be an exception—but you seemed so… so miserable.”

In which Yuuri is the god of love and Victor forced himself into exile.

I got stuck in Dancing Daffodils hell, and if you haven’t read that fic yet, I highly suggest you give it a try!! I have just so many feels for it. @grayclouds is simply amazing. (ಥ﹏ಥ)

I know many things probably won’t be as accurate, but I needed to get it out of my system. rip

2

Because when was the last time nobody knew where Jemma was?

Prepare for a sappy post. I plugged in my keyboard just for this.

Firstly, I’m very sorry @therealjacksepticeye for the horrible attempt at messy hair and facial hair. Sorry it’s late too. I’ve been drawing this since about 10am yesterday (GMT)

Congratulations on reaching 14 million subscribers! You make so many people happy on a daily basis and I look up to you for that. Your personality is just contagious and you are just the nicest person I know. The community we have all built is the most loving, accepting community and I am so happy to be a part of it.
I’ve been through a lot of **** recently and you have kept me going through it and I’m sure a lot of other people feel the same way.
Not only did you help me through some really tough times but have also helped me realise what I want to do with my life (without knowing it of course).
I realised recently that I just want to make people happy and the thought of anything else doesn’t make me look forward to the future so I started a YouTube channel and with that, I hope to make a community as loving and accepting as yours and to raise as much money as humanly possible for charity. Even if it takes me 3 years to even get one subscriber, I won’t want to do anything else.
So thank you from the bottom of my heart, Sean, and thank you to the community for being so darned awesome!
Love, Rosie

alex danvers is my star. i would lie down on burning hot coals for that woman. she is strength and determination personified. i mean, ever since kara arrived, alex has felt so inadequate. she’s never felt like she measured up, and even now she still worries about being a disappointment. but alex danvers is supergirl’s hero. kara zor-el, who can fly, lift an airplane, and shoot lasers from her eyes, looks at alex with respect and admiration. not only because she’s her sister, and not just because of her work for the deo. no, alex has always been kara’s hero. ever since they were kids and she realized what an amazing listener alex is. since alex protected her from the bullies at school. since kara, dropped onto a foreign planet, looked at her new sister and saw something familiar mirrored in alex…a desire to protect. but what gets me is that alex sees these amazing traits in kara…her strength, her bravery, her selflessness. but what she doesn’t see is that so much of what shaped kara into the superhero she is, came from watching alex.

docs.google.com
YOI Artist Blogs
Master Google Database for all YOI Artist Blogs! Open for anyone to edit!

As a huge fan of the incredible fan art that’s been produced in YOI fandom, I thought I would start a master database of all of the artists in YOI! 

Since I can’t possibly follow every single YOI artist in all of Tumblr, I’ve only listed the artists I follow currently. 

If anyone else wants to help collaborate by editing this doc and adding to it, please feel free to do so! If you are an artist, please feel free to add yourself; if you’re a fan, please feel free to add someone else whose art you like. 

Click here or the title for the link to database

This database categorizes artists by: ships/characters drawn; NSFW; requests; commissions; repost policy; and preferred language!

I wasn’t able to figure out some of the answers for categories for many artists, as they did not have an FAQ page, or it wasn’t immediately apparent on their page, but did my best! I know I’m missing a TON of amazing artists, so if anyone wants to help, I think this would be awesome. :D 

Currently listed artists include:

@1o8k @aina-p @alpakappa @amelin-art @ask–viktor @ammeja @badlydrawnyuurikatsuki @badlydrawnseung-gil @blau678 @brilcrist @campaignofmadness @chaotichero @cookiecreation @crimson-chains @cubisticking @dedemidianart @doodlesonice @dorkishdorkish1905 @gairanelixir @hasuyawwn @kaciart @kamisartvonkunst @kantonliu @lamenart @mikkapi @minatu @nerfitisketch @niyaokul @redzonest @sakihokoru @seek-victory @shynii @themightynyunyi @yukipri @yurionniiice

If you are an artist above and would like to be properly categorized, please check out the doc. ^_^

Please reblog! <3 

If you have any suggestions as to how this database can be improved, please let me know!! ^^

2

Okay here it goes,
First off it took some digging to find the first photo but thats me some years ago compared to me now. I just want to say how happy I am that I’ve come so far since coming out. I used to try so hard to fit in with what a girl was “supposed” to be. I tried to embrace my body and accentuate my female aspects but that just made me feel more and more dysphoric. Things have been hard since coming out but I don’t regret it at all. I have a long longggg ways ahead of me with transition but I’m hopeful that I’ll get through it and everything will work out. I couldn’t be more thankful for the people around me who have helped me and supported me through this, this includes my siblings, friends, and so many of you on tumblr.
Im working on bettering myself and being happy & I’m glad I’ve made it this far.