help help i've fallen

“Weakling shells“ “You can do this….. fingertips only“

“Do you even know how to crack an egg?” “Silence!!!!“

Vegeta was killing me this ep….OMFG my sides they hurt XDDDDD

Cannot right now!!!!!!

Stuff that definitely happens at the Katsuki-Nikiforov wedding banquet:
  • Chris teaching Katsuki Toshiya how to do the butt squeeze thing
  • (During a Katsuki Toshiya - Christophe Giacometti dance off. Who wins? Who knows.)
  • The bouquet is a collection of gorgeous red roses that are thrown one by one to every figure skater in attendance so nobody feels left out and EVERYONE is TOUCHED by the POWER of TRUE LOVE
  • (Yuuri saves the last one for Minako and throws it directly her way because Minako is Very Important) 
  • DJ Otabek drops the beats
  • (DJ assistant Yuri Plisetsky occasionally playing completely incongruous music while Otabek Gets Really Into It)
  • Yakov giving Victor away 
  • (”PLEASE TAKE THIS TROUBLESOME FOOL FROM ME. TAKE HIM. I’VE BEEN TRYING TO GET HIM OUT OF MY HAIR FOR YEARS. TAKE HIM!!! HE’LL DRIVE YOU CRAZY BUT AT LEAST I’LL BE FREE. I DESERVE THIS. I’M AN OLD MAN NOW. SEE THESE GRAY HAIRS? I’VE NAMED THEM ALL VICTOR.” “Yakov, what’s happening with your eyes?” “THEY’RE LEAKING BECAUSE OF MY IMPENDING FREEDOM.”) 
  • Every photograph has Victor’s ring in it. 
  • (Literally every photograph. Even the ones he’s not in, his hand is there, and his ring is Finding The Light)
  • Nishigori and Yuuri dance
  • Yuuko and Yuri dance
  • Victor and Katsuki Hiroko dance
  • Minako and Lilia Baranovskaya dance
  • Phichit and Seung Gil dance
  • Yuri puts the rose he caught (TECHNICALLY it got STUCK in his HAIR because SOMEONE can’t THROW) on top of Otabek’s rose
  • Yakov is Not Crying
  • Katsuki Toshiya is Still Doing The Butt Squeeze Thing It’s Literally 4am
  • The account sukeota3sisters gains 20k followers in one night posting exclusive candid photographs from the wedding of the century
The One Where You Think There's A Pool Party (Jeff Atkins)

You walk into Sheri’s front yard and are almost immediately overwhelmed with the urge to throttle her.

Come over to my place tonight,” she had told you during school. “Everyone’ll be there. I’m at my mom’s for the weekend, so I’ll have the pool.” She winked at you, texting you the address seconds later.

Now you’re here, and pool-party your fat ass. Sheri doesn’t even have a fucking pool.

“Dude, what the fuck are you wearing,” you hear from the porch, and you remind yourself that there’s no shame in getting back in your car and putting actual clothes on. The only shame is in showing up to someone’s house half-naked.

“I was told that there would be swimming,” you say lamely, turning to Jessica and giving her a dead-eyed look of annoyance. “Hence the skivvies,” you motion to your swimsuit, sleek and tight and baring everything you have to offer.

Everything.

“Swimming,” Jessica repeats, laughing, and you shake your head with a scoff, already pulling your towel around yourself. “Wrong party-theme, although you do look hot.”

“Much appreciated, ma'am.”

“And you brought clothes, right? The boys in there are going to be in for a very expensive sexual harassment lawsuit if you walk in like that.” Jessica raises a brow, smiling behind her beer cup.

You snorts. “I brought a pair of jeans – figured no one would mind having these –” you grab at your chest, “– in their faces all night.”

“I know I wouldn’t.” She grins, biting her thumbnail. Her nail polish glitters underneath the porch lights, and she laughs as you raise your brows.

“Watch it,” you point, your grin mocking and sly. “Or I’ll sue you for sexual harassment.”

-

It’s loud when you enter the house. Loud and bright and warm, the heat of the mesh of people warming you up as soon as you step into the room.

“Look at you, you put pants on!” Jessica shouts over the music, laughing too hard to be sober. You shrug and throw her a lazy grin.

“I might be tempted to take them off again if I get a drink.”

“Please tell me you’re being serious.”

“Get me a drink and you’ll find out.” You wink – and god, what the fuck, you’re sure you look like some sort of perv or harasser or creep – but Jessica laughs again, face flushed. She takes a heavy sip from her cup.

“No shirt, no service,” she winks back. “But for you, I’ll get you a semi-warm beer.”

“My favorite.”

Jessica grins again, eyes bright and her laugh lazy, and leaves you there, between the sofa and the stereo.

You mingle, ignoring the raunchy stares, and keep an eye out for Sheri.

It’s not long before you run into Jeff, who looks about three beers in and only too pleased to see you. You can’t lie, the sight of him makes you feel like you’re walking on air, giddy and light.

“I was wondering when I’d run into you,” you say, and Jeff laughs.

“Well, I knew I’d run into you,” he points at you with his beer bottle. “Not a party until you show up.” He looks down. “I just wasn’t expecting you to look so …”

“Just say it.”

“Exposed.” Jeff laughs, eyeing your outfit with raised brows and a pleased smile. “Don’t get me wrong, the look suits you. I’m just afraid I’m gonna have to chase the guys away with my baseball bat.” He winks.

“Oh, what a man. What a hero,” you place your hand on your chest and sigh dreamily, only half-faking. You can’t deny it, Jeff makes you swoon sometimes. What can you say, he’s handsome, he’s dreamy, and a girl can only take too much before she’s weak in the knees and flirting back.

Flirting. That’s what you both did. You had a mild flirtation between you, all charm and jokes and subtle touches. You just wish he would lose the charm and touch you a little more.

“You drinking anything?” He asks, subtly touching your hand with his knuckles, his body close enough to get away with it. You bump your hand back into his. You wonder if that’s what makes his smile brighten.

“Yeah,” you look around. “Or, no – Jess went on a trek to get me a beer, but I think she got lost. Something about finding me a warm one.”

“She’ll be in the yard,” Jeff takes a hold of your shoulder, turning you. “Come on, I’ll take you. Get you a cold beer while we’re there.” His hand finds its way to your back, cold from his bottle and shocking against your exposed skin.

You feel ten degrees hotter.

You make your way into Sheri’s yard, and you grin at the fairy lights hanging over the crowd, small and sparkling as they hover in the air. There’s a litter of plates and cups on the ground, hitting your feet with every other step, and you finally stoop to pick them up and throw them in the trash after you step on one half-way filled with beer.

Jeff follows, picking up his own share of bottles and cups, and nudges you. “Jessica makes a good chicken.”

You stare. “Uh, okay. Yeah.”

He rolls his eyes and points. You turn, beholding Jessica on top of Zach’s shoulders, shoving Sheri into a kiddie pool. She raises a foam football into the air and shouts, excited, while Zach cheers.

“This isn’t what I was thinking when she said she would have a pool.” You snicker, taking in the multitude of inflatable pools across the yard, and Jeff grins.

“At least you’re dressed for it.” He hands you a fresh bottle, cracked open and foaming at the top. You accept it, taking half of a sip and grinning.

“Tell me you brought swimming trunks, because you’re my partner when we play that.”

-

It’s hours later and you’re more or less dried off from your couple dozen falls in Sheri’s pools. The sun’s just beginning to rise, the sky turning a pale blue, and there are only a handful of people lingering in the house.

You’re on the porch, just getting ready to leave when the door swings open.

“Leaving already?” Jeff asks, hazy eyed but smiling. You laugh.

“Yeah, I think I’ve been dunked enough times tonight. Jess plays dirty.” You have his jacket around you, large and warm against the cool morning air. You begin to shrug it off.

“Give it to me tomorrow,” Jeff stops you.

You raise an eyebrow. “Didn’t know I was seeing you.”

“Now you know,” he grins, lazy and charming. You feel your heart swell, and you duck your head to hide your pleased smile. Fuck, you feel like melting. “See you tomorrow, kid.”

You throw a hand up as you walk away. “Tomorrow, Atkins.” You don’t see his own smile as you leave.