heathers the musical*

For the nights you feel like having a Broadway marathon (Part 2)...

Heathers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wADmIGvpOs
Into The Woods (Original cast members-1987)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MP8fw_LhOOg
Matilda
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiEzBgyn8L8
Hamilton Act 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IpjWMBC0eDs
Hamilton Act 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExpN570RY60
Finding Neverland (Original Cast) Part 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NadhmTC6wo
Part 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rd3o4Il-D14
Part 3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsirj2yp45s
Part 4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNmwmCAvdwM
Part 5
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GakHSp8teI
Falsettos Act 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hanPzYiSqE8
Falsettos Act 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmoipyKY6eU
Amélie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJ3UzFBMr24&t=1033s
Newsies (Original Cast)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=029D0LtYLTE
Aladdin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxL6aaaOEQQ&t=6234s
Peter Pan (Cathy Rigby)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCGmFfHc2XQ
Waitress Act 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qC-LNRkMtY8
Waitress Act 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRL1L0N8mBQ
Sister Act
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eidFj2fw98s
Bring It On
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdSd7Me4qU8
Chicago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVjVFqBkCqU
Catch Me If You Can
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPuCJTiyN7g
Memphis
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkWr8Py-RU4
A Chorus Line (2006 Revival)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SP8syH_cjMo
Spamalot Part 1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83o9wBO6XBQ
Part 2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhBUUcxDuKU
Part 3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC73CPwdjpc
Part 4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC73CPwdjpc
Part 5
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OsUOlzw0cso
Part 6
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OsUOlzw0cso
Part 7
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MGELQN2fB7I
Part 8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uPQp53MCy9Q
Part 9
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-FBXxfJ66Y
Part 10
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lm2NksMFD44
Part 11
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNMLkIFRG-c
Part 12
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtTYZT8Snxw

first minute of musicals
  • Hamilton: Tragic Backstory
  • Heathers: normal depressed high school no murder... nope
  • RENT: how the fuck we gonna pay rent ohgOD
  • Dear Evan Hansen: enjoy the peace and confusion while it lasts sweetie
  • Be More Chill: dick: out
The Signs As Musicals
  • Aries: Spring Awakening
  • Taurus: Matilda
  • Gemini: Newsies
  • Cancer: Waitress
  • Leo: Heathers
  • Virgo: The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee
  • Libra: The Phantom of the Opera
  • Scorpio: Something Rotten!
  • Sagittarius: Falsettos
  • Capricorn: Dear Evan Hansen
  • Aquarius: Come From Away
  • Pisces: Dogfight

Some of the best things I’ve heard in Heathers rehearsal so far:

  • “Oh no! My shirt, where’d it go?” followed by really slow and awkward finger guns
  • “Free pizza, and we don’t even have to buy it a pussy!”
  • “Those stupid tree thumpers”
  • *dramatically pirouettes and leaps in* “BIG SWORDFIGHT IN HER MOUTHHH”
  • “Aww that seems like a relationship that would last.” “Yeah until one of them blows up” “I guess you could say their love is….. explosive”
  • *Our choreographer screaming like one of those sheep used in parodies back in vintage youtube days whenever she gets frustrated or needs to get people’s attention.*
  • “So you’re going to do a Jesus lift” “A WHAT” “Just put your arms out and they’ll lift you like you’re Jesus resurrecting from the cross”
  • “Welcome to Newsies on steroids.”
  • “Be the closeted gay we all need.”
  • “The first step to any good plan is murder.”
  • “How much bitch is enough bitch though?”
  • “Imagine having to explain to someone like ““oh how’d you break your tailbone?” ““Oh I booty-popped too hard.”” 
  • “When we go off to makeover Veronica, can she still have the monocle, but, hear me out, it’s now bedazzled.”
  • “I have to check the historical accuracy of bedazzling in the ‘80s.”
  • “Okay, but what if we made it gay?”
  • “COSTUME NOTE: SOMEONE MAKE RAM PARTY SLIPPERS!” “What if they’re like bunny slippers, but with tiny party hats?!”
  • “This is Ram, he’s not very nice, but somehow my best friend still wants to fuck him.”
  • “Your whole bio better be about how much you love and respect women or else I can’t help you when your ass is being kicked.”
  • “I paired you guys together because you say he’s your sort of boyfriend later.” *Kurt proceeds to emark in various sexual dance endeavors with multiple other women* “That’s where the sort of comes into play….”
  • “SHUT UP HEATHER” *bursts out crying*
  • Our original Chandler dropped out so our original Duke got promoted to her role and just looks at me and says “Oh my god this is the most Heather Duke thing that has ever happened to me”
  • “That’s a school cheer?!?!”
  • “Real question: WHO HAS A FUCKING LOCK ON THEIR CLOSET?”
  • “What if when she makes you spit up the pills, your wig flies off?” “Oh no you’ve discovered the real reason behind my crisis, I AM NOT A NATURAL BLONDE”
  • “Maybe he should take up knitting or something as a hobby rather than therapedic murder.”
  • “The saddest thing is that’s not even 3rd base”
  • “Veronica, you’re soaking wet!” *cue our assistant stage manager loosing her shit*
  • “My character description is just internal screaming.”
  • “Who needs a dance partner when you have weed?”
  • “I feel bad having to ask but was that supposed to be a dick joke?”
  • “Do I get extra points if one of the pills hits someone in the face?”
  • “I can’t remember the lyrics but I’m pretty sure I’m still gay”
  • “Why didn’t they just throw the bomb and run or something, like why are they so determined to die?” 
  • *recites Blue Reprise as demonic slam poetry because we didn’t have rehearsal tracks yet*  
  • “Veronica, it’s not a phase. I’m just naturally a slightly psychotic bag of angst with great hair.”
  • *music director teaching us Blue* ”They’ll curl up on your face. And purr like-” *slowly looks up from music and proceeds to put his head in his hands* “There’s moments that I evaluate my life and this is definitely one of them.”

And we’re still about 3 weeks from tech week

Musicals I've Seen/Heard
  • Les Mis: we're all sad
  • Phantom: sing, bitch. WAIT NO I DIDN'T MEAN THAT I LO-
  • Hamilton: fITE ME
  • Annie: I CONVINCED THE GOVERNMENT TO BE NICE BECAUSE I'M ****THAT**** OPTIMISTIC
  • 21 Chump Street: u fucked up naomi
  • Heathers: we're all dead
  • Legally Blonde: FUCK YOU, WARNER (but thanks for making me hate u now im the best lawyer)
  • Dear Evan Hansen: we WERE TOTALLY friends, me and that dead, gay kid. Buddy, pal, chum, friend, no homo,,,,,
  • Be More Chill: i wanna be cool and i fucked up trying to do that