Oh god, I imagine tiny!Derek holding tinier!Stiles' hand after asking the sheriff for Stiles' hand in marriage to tell his mom that he already proposed to Stiles and the sheriff said yes so he would take responsibility, Derek even had toy ring too! Talia facepalmed and hid her laughter so Derek wouldn't think that he's being laughed at while whatever Hale was present at that time recorded them with a camera phone and vowed to broadcast this on their wedding day.
“Boys,” John says as Derek Hale walks into the bullpen, tugging Stiles by the hand. Stiles is only three, but he’s no pushover. If Derek Hale is dragging him around, it’s only because Stiles demanded it.
Stiles grins at him. “Daddy! Hi, Daddy!”
“Hi, kiddo,” John says. He leans back on the edge of his desk and folds his arms across his chest. “What’s going on? Aren’t you two supposed to be in the park?”
John’s stuck at work, sure, but Claudia and Stiles were going to meet the Hale pack in the park for a picnic. Claudia is the Hale pack emissary, after all.
Derek’s eyebrows tug together. He’s a serious looking kid. Eight years old, and he can worry like a world champion. “Deputy Stilinski,” he says, and since when has he been this formal? He edges closer, still holding Stiles’s hand. He juts his chin out stubbornly, and the rest of his words come out in a breathy rush: “In ‘cordance with pack law I am stating my intentions to marry your son. Will you negotiate?”
John looks around the bullpen. Derek’s little speech (and he almost got the words right) has gotten the attention of his colleagues. Madison looks like he’s about to drop his armful of paperwork and coo at Derek, and John narrows his eyes in warning. No. One does not coo at a werewolf, even if he is only eight years old and totally fucking adorable right now. Derek is clearly trying to be a Grown Up.
“I will,” John says, because what? He’s not going to break the kid’s heart in front of an audience. “What do you offer in exchange for my consent?”
Derek unpeels Stiles’s sticky hand from his own and digs around in his pockets. He shuffles up to John’s desk and sets down all his worldly possessions: three slightly soggy cheetos and a dented Matchbox car. Then he pushes his shoulders back and stares up at John, stubborn and hopeful all at once.
“Oh my god,” Madison whispers under his breath.
“Oooh!” Stiles says, and reaches out for the car.
Drek grabs his chubby wrist. “No! That’s for your dad. So we can play together all the time, even when we’re big.”
“Oh.” Stiles turns his big brown eyes toward John beseechingly.
“Beta Hale,” John says solemnly. “I accept. You have my consent to marry Stiles.”
Derek sags with relief.
Stiles tries to grab one of the cheetos.
“No!” Derek says again.
Stiles scowls at him. “I want cheetos!”
“Don’t eat your bride price, son,” John says. “Why don’t you two head back to the park? I’ll bet the picnic is set up by now. Mom packed you peanut butter cups, Stiles.”
“Oooh! Yummy!” Stiles is already heading for the door. “Bye, Daddy!”
Derek Hale rushes after him.
Madison comes over to inspect the Matchbox car. “You know you just promised your three year old son in marriage, right, John?”
“Huh.” John shrugs. “They’re kids. They’ll forget about it by tomorrow.”
Twenty years later the Matchbox car is in the pocket of John’s suit as he gives Stiles away at the altar.
i feel like obi-wan was constantly giving cody heart attacks because as the war went on and got more and more dangerous, obi-wan kept deciding “oh, i kinda feel like wearing less aRMOR TODAY”
like honestly, look at this:
early in the clone wars he had chest armor that looks like it probably covers his heart from both the front and the back and also has plating all the way up his arms as well as on his shins. it’s not perfect, but it’s definitely something, especially considering how the majority of the time, the enemy used blasters
after the time skip, apparently obi decided all that plastoid was cramping his style so he got rid of basically all of it except for his forearms. i would love to see his clones’ reaction to finding out their reckless general had now made himself even more of a target.
by ROTS obi-wan decided to basically fuck armor entirely, opting for fabric and leather alone, content in the assumption that the power of the force and pure concentrated sass will save him. he doesn’t even have gloves anymore lol. cody has long given up hope.
let me know if you liked this it’s tragically long i went overboard haha
first and foremost, peter would be the most loving/attentive/caring and overall best boyfriend to ever exist, ever
he’s also a needy baby who likes attention
“You haven’t kissed me in, like, five whole minutes”
majority of the time you make peter very flustered so you’re usually the one to initiate the kisses because he’s a blushing mess
he thinks you’re the most gorgeous person to ever walk the earth
he cannot believe you’re as in love with him as he is with you
“How’d I get so lucky”
“Peter stop it it’s not like I’m a magical princess I’m normal stoppp”
“But are you sure about that”
he will adamantly deny that he likes staring at you but that’s all he does when you’re with him
he prefers to call it gazing because it sounds less creepy and the last thing he wants is for you to think he’s a creep
he likes to tease you about the fact that you had a crush on him for most of your freshman year and it annoys you endlessly
“That’s so cute Y/N how adorable”
“I will literally break up with you right now”
“What no no I’m sorry I love you don’t do that”
the first time he told you that he loved you he stuttered for a solid ten minutes, almost cried because c’mon Peter just tell her you love her you idiot she’s gonna hate you if you keep stumbling over your words like a madman oh my god you haven’t said anything in five minutes no one has ever been silent this long
finally he closed his eyes and choked out the words and when he opened his eyes he swore that he had never seen anything as beautiful as the way you were smiling at him in that very moment
after that he has no problem saying it to you whenever he can no matter where you are or what you’re doing
“Mr. Parker can you please share what you were just whispering to Ms. Y/L/N with the rest of the class?”
“Oh yeah I was just telling her that I love her because I do and I need to make sure that she doesn’t forget” *cue adorable smile*
“Oh my god Peter please be quiet I love you too you weirdo”
he kind of lives for embarrassing for you, he thinks it’s the funniest thing
you love Ned too and it kind of makes Peter jealous sometimes which is just hilarious to witness
“You’re spending an awful lot of time with Ned”
“…………..I spend every waking moment with you and Ned hangs out with us dummy”
you’re the only person he tells about being Spider-Man because you’re you and he can’t keep something like that from the love of his life that’s just not how it works
when he sends Happy voicemails every day he makes sure to update him on how you’re doing and whatever thing you do that day that Peter found adorable
when Happy finally texts Peter back he doesn’t ask Peter how he’s doing he asks about you
Peter introduces you to Tony with a proud smile on his face as he practically shoves you at him
“Mr. Stark Mr. Stark Mr. Stark this is my girlfriend the one Happy told you about I wanted her to meet you isn’t she cool Mr. Stark”
“As long as she’s not as hyper as you are I think I’ll like her very much”
“Oh great ‘cause she’s very calm right Y/N?”
“Peter babe please stop yelling in my ear”
“I like her already!”
he’s very big on calling you my love because it makes you get all shy and you turn away from him since you’re getting embarrassed
he proudly talks about you to anyone within earshot and everyone comes to love you because adorable, precious Peter Parker does too
Aunt May might love you more than Peter does
sometimes Peter will come home to find you already sitting at the table with her sipping coffee out of his favorite mug and talking about your days and he just lights up with happiness
you yell at him every time he loses yet another backpack
“when will you learn your lesson about webbing your bag to the wall in dark alleys where thieves and probably murders hang out”
“that’d be a never”
you kind of hate that he’s Spider-Man since the job is extremely dangerous and he literally almost died fighting Vulture
“are you sure you’re okay? i don’t want you dying on me”
“i would never leave you my love i promise”
you yell at him whenever he comes back to his house with new bruises and injuries but he knows you’re just yelling because you care and so he takes the yelling and the angry crying from you and hugs you really tight and strokes your hair and tells you that he’s fine and it’s just a scratch and gives you the whole you should see the other guy spiel
he draws engagement rings on your ring finger and swears he’ll make sure it’s a real one day and not just a shitty circle drawing because yeah he’s fifteen and so are you but who cares you’re the one for him and living without you is a life he doesn’t want to even imagine
it’s just not an option and never will be
he gets anxiety whenever you have to ride the train out of Queens and back into Manhattan alone since that’s where you live
“but what if something happens and i’m not there and you get hurt i wouldn’t be able to live with myself”
he goes through metro cards like water in the summer when he doesn’t have his student one because he refuses to let you take the train alone
he never lets go of your hand when you’re together… so basically he’s never once stopped holding hands with you unless absolutely necessary
you telling him to ask Tony to let you become an avenger
you want to be Black Widow 2.0
or maybe Scarlet Witch but you don’t have powers like Wanda does so Black Widow 2.0
Tony actually says he’ll think about it because whenever he goes to see Peter or Peter comes to see him you tag along ( “we’re kind of a package deal Mr. Stark” ) and you’ve grown on him considerably
after Peter meets the Avengers for the first time you plead with him to let you meet them too and when he finally relents you almost faint in front of Cap and have a heart attack in front of Natasha
“Sorry she’s a little excited she’s not usually like this”
“I think I need a glass of water or an oxygen tank”
“Mr. Stark do you have an oxygen tank”
“She didn’t faint in front of me I’m offended Y/N”
Cap offhandedly says you and Peter are cute kids and you almost die
Peter is definitely not jealous aT ALL
you reassure him that you love him more than Cap and always will
you would never want Peter to think for a second that anyone else could ever take you away from him you love him too much to think about that
he’s just ridiculously head over heels beautifully in love with you and he wears that love on his sleeve for the entire universe to see and doesn’t care if he’s called “whipped” because hell yeah he is
he managed to become the boyfriend of the most divine person he’s ever had the pleasure of meeting
who wouldn’t be a lovestruck mess over you is the better question