he-was-not-amused-with-me

Stevie [Part 1]

Prompt : Based on @shittyauswhere a superhero has to deal with a supervillain who thinks they’re their best friend

Pairing : Steve Rogers x OC

Genre : Good ol’ crack and fluff  |   Warning : none

Author’s Note : IT’S BEEN SO LONG AND I’M FINALLY HERE AGAIN AND I MISSED YOU GUYS SO I hope you guys will like this! <3 let me know what you think! this is going to be a 2/3 chaptered fix so yay!

Originally posted by rogerses

“He’s not moving.” Bucky mumbled and nudged Natasha’s arm, lips twisted into an amused smile.

“I know.” Natasha hisses back, hands on her waist while she watched her friend’s jaw dropped in shock.

Once they realized this will take lot longer than they expected, they started to look around the destroyed park and took a seat on the only standing bench near them, eyes still trained on Steve and the woman standing in front of him.

“She’s cute.” Bucky commented after a while.

“For a supervillain.” Natasha nodded, lightly chuckling at the slight twitch of Steve’s eyes when the woman’s face brightened.

* * *

“[Y/N].”

“HELLO, STEVIE!” She pranced towards him. Pranced. Steve could hear Bucky laughing behind him and it took every willpower in him not to throw his shield at his best friend.

Steve let out a long sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger. She had her hair tied in a high ponytail today and she was wearing a different shade of dark blue denim jacket.  God. He hated this and he hated himself more for paying attention to these kind of details. She stopped short in front of him, eyes twinkling with glee, which was never a good thing. God knows what else she had done aside from almost leveling the park to the ground and he didn’t want to think about that at all.

“You know I have to arrest you, right?”

“But I got us a table at the new restaurant around the block!” She gawked at him as if he was the evil one. God help him. Steve’s eyes twitched a little at her shocked expression. He’d tell her she was an adorable if it weren’t for the fact that she is a supervillain.

“And who did you threaten to get that reservation?”

“I did not threaten anyone.” She gasped in mock hurt, clutching her hand to her chest and Steve let out another sigh.

“Look! Here’s the ticket.” She took it out of her jacket pocket and showed it to him, smiling sheepishly when he noticed the names and the tiny red stain on the corner. “They’re not going to miss it.”

“Please tell me you didn’t kill them.” Steve groaned.

“I didn’t! They’re already dead, okay! I found this in the morgue when I was snooping around. And it’s a nice restaurant!”

Steve squeezed his eyes shut for a few seconds and took a few deep breaths. He could still hear Natasha and Bucky laughing at him from across the park. Another sigh escaped his lips before he turned to face her again. She was still staring at him with her hopeful eyes and flushed cheeks and goddammit he wasn’t supposed to think she was cute. He wasn’t supposed to think about her at all. He snatched the ticket from her. Her face broke into a huge smile and he cursed himself when his heart did that stupid pit-a-pat thing. She destroyed a park. She just destroyed a park. Get a hold of yourself.

“So, are you going to pick me up at six? We could go to a little ice cream shop afterwards. The weather’s a bit chilly but we’re both kinda immune to that, right? We could bond and be friends. I even let you have a sleepover at my pl–HEY!”

“You’re coming with us, [Y/N].” Steve grumbled, sensing an oncoming headache while he cuffed her hands.

“I guess that’s a no on the dinner and ice cream?”

* * *

In retrospect, he probably should have seen it coming. Why else would they ask him to come to stop a robbery. Tony invented a fucking state-of-the-art stun gun that could help the bankers put down the robbers discreetly. The man even went down to the bank himself to teach them how to use it. Maria Hill only shook her head when he mentioned this and forced him to go and stop the robbery. She literally pushed him into the car, not giving him time to change, shove the shield inside, and slammed the car door shut before he could say anything. So much for a weekend, Steve thought,

“STEVIE!” Steve (along with Bucky and Sam who wanted to tag along) turned his head towards the building and gawked at her. She was standing by the window, flailing her arms around to get his attention. And she beamed. She fucking beamed when he finally caught her eyes.

“Your girlfriend’s real cute.” Sam snickered.

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

“Keep telling yourself that, pal.” Bucky smacked Steve’s shoulder before he and Sam jogged away from him. Steve flipped them off and muttered a string of curse words as he made his way inside the bank.

She had rounded all civilians in a corner and was busy emptying the vault when he walked inside. Blue swirls of her power floated past him as she put the money inside another duffel bag.

“What the fuck is this, [Y/N].” Steve said before he could even stop himself. She pushed the plate of cookies towards him with her power and moved away from the empty vault. Steve fleetingly wondered what these civilians were thinking as they watched the interaction between [Y/N] and him.

“Cookies! Chocolate chip cookies! Fresh from the oven!” She grinned, taking a piece of the cookie. “I even bought you coffee,” she added as she took out a cup of starbucks coffee from under the table and for a moment, he was touched. The warm feeling quickly replaced with mild indignation when he read the name on the cup.

“Mr. Stan.” He looked up from the cup and  narrowed his eyes at her. “You stole this.”

“He was nowhere to be seen.” She shrugged. She casually took a sip from the cup before munching on her cookie.

“Come sit here, Steve.” She pat the chair next to her and gestured her other hand towards the frightened group of people. “I promise I’ll let them go.”

“…..fine.” He begrudgingly sat next to her, eyes fixed on her as she opened the door with a flick of her hand.

Her lips curled into a smile and she motioned at the opened door, voice light and cheerful as she spoke, “You’re free to go.”

“So…. How are you, Steve? You look good in leather jacket. I like it.” She was so bubbly and cheerful it threw him off for a good minute. She was wearing a similar brown leather jacket paired with a turtleneck and black skinny jeans. She even braided her hair today, he noticed.

“Why are so quiet? Are you pissed that I didn’t go to your thanksgiving dinner?” She asked again. “You know i was in jail, right?”

“I know. I PUT YOU THERE.” Steve groaned, slamming his head against the cold table.

She laid her head on the table and gave him a little smile when he opened his eyes. “Look at us, being friends and shit. We’d make a lovely couple too.”

“We’re not friends. You’re a villain, [Y/N].”

“Labels are not my thing.” She shrugged and rested her hand on his shoulder. Steve’s heart definitely did not skip a beat when she didn’t break eye contact with him and gave him the most adorable smile he has ever seen.

She hummed a little christmas tune and started to tell him about her days, oblivious to Steve’s inner turmoil.

“I saw your fat dog the other day. Kept it in my place while you were gone.”

“WHAT?!”

“Such a nice dog. I love him. I named him Eggtart.”

Steve buried his face in his arms and groaned. “So that’s why he never responded when I call his name.”

“ANYWAY… I think I want to borrow Eggtart again next week. I found a nice dog beach not far from here and I want to take him there. You’re free to join us if you want.”

“Eggtart is a ridiculous name.” Steve finally said after a while.

“So… you’re coming with me and Eggtart next week?”

Steve wished he could go into cryostasis and sleep for another century.

Keep reading

seriously

I am so upset
Jonghyun is such a nice person and this should be an amazing evening celebrating for him yet he has to apologise to you 
most of you aren’t even remotely Indian so what’s up with that??

I get it, people on here get offended by freaking everything and you can be whatever but seriously shit I mean this is not meant to offend IT’S A JOKE 
it’s not even appropriation!!

but no you guys got to be offended. seriously just take a joke and leave. you know what happens when someone makes a joke about me?  I laugh. Because they mean no harm and it’s amusing

that’s what you all should try 

but noooo we have to be upset because tumblr is so freaking GOOD AT BEING BUTTHURT

3

Imagine Spencer getting jealous of your new pet.

“Look at how cute he is!” you cooed, holding out your phone to show Spencer the video of your new pitbull puppy.

Spencer grinned, letting out a chuckle of amusement, “He’s really cute. Did you know that pit bulls actually pre-date the United States? They were originally bred in England and were brought over by the settlers. They were also often referred to as nanny dogs or nursemaids because they were considered so trustworthy with children. They also don’t actually have locking jaws. They’re more just determined than anything else.”

You smiled, tucking your phone back into your pocket, “Determined is right. You should have seen him trying to follow me up the stairs yesterday.”

Spencer frowned slightly, “My mom never let me have a dog. She thought they’d shed too much or chew on her slippers. I always wanted a puppy though.”

You grinned crookedly, reaching over to give the genius’ arm a squeeze, “Well, you can be a joint parent of my puppy, if you want.”

He smiled softly, “That’d be nice.”

“Good. You can housetrain your son.”

Gif Credit: Spencer / Puppy

We don’t have enough scenes with Lucius and Tyler so here:

[From the beginning of the story.]

Tyler entered the kitchen, still rubbing his eye.

“Good morning, peanut brittle,” Lucius said, flipping several pancakes.

There was a snort to his left. Jason was sitting on the bar stool, looking amused. “Did you just call my brother peanut brittle?”

“Yeah,” their guardian said. “What? Not good? I’m trying to come up with a nickname.”

“What’s mine?”

“Fireball.”

Jason gave a start. “Because I make fireballs?”

“Nope,” Lucius said, dumping the pancakes onto three plates. “Because you’re driving me to drink.”

The teenager laughed and helped Tyler onto a stool. They eagerly dug in. 

Lucius joined them, choosing his words carefully as he said, “Listen, would you two be okay if I went hour for an hour or so? I won’t be long. I need to help a few of my friends.”

Jason narrowed his eyebrows. “Friends or vils?”

“Both; though they prefer to be called villains,” said Lucius with a slight edge to his voice.

“What are you doing?”

“A bunch of Unisex Campers are selling cookies in the library parking lot.”

“So, what?” Jason asked with a grin. “A bunch of big bad supervillains are going to steal cookies?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Lucius said. There was a pause before he added, “On an unrelated note, what’s your favorite type of cookie?”

The teenager chortled. “Peanut butter.”

Lucius took a mental note before asking, “Tyler?”

Tyler didn’t answer. He had started to tremble. His bottom lip shook most of all and his eyes stung.

“Pancake?” Lucius asked, causing Jason to boo. “Are you all right?”

This got the teenager’s attention. “Hey, Ty, what’s wrong? Are you sick?”

He perked up at this before nodding. He let out a string of coughs before signing, ‘I feel sick.’

Lucius melted faster than the butter on the pancakes. “Come on; let’s go back to bed. I’ll make you some hot chocolate.”

“Hey!” Jason cried.

“I’ll make you some too.”

Lucius stayed at Tyler’s bedside all day, reading from his favorite stories and making up stories of his own. He did all of the voices, just like at bedtime.

He even stayed with Tyler the next day; and the day after that. The small boy swallowed disgusting medicine that tasted like spicy cotton candy. Lucius kept chuckling at his reactions, insisting that it would make his cough go away.

It didn’t.

“All right,” Lucius said on the fourth day, “we’re taking you to see the doctor.”

Tyler panicked and frantically signed, ‘Outside?’

His guardian gave him a strange look. “Yes, the doctor’s office is accessed via the outside.”

‘You can’t!” the boy signed. ‘I can’t,. I don’t want to go to the doctor. Don’t make me go. Please, Lucius?’

“Okay, okay,” Lucius said. “I’ll tell you what; I’ll go pick up some more cough medicine from the store. If that doesn’t help, we’ll go tomorrow. Deal?”

Tyler shook his head.

“W-why not?”

‘I don’t want you to go outside! I don’t want you to go outside! I don’t—’

He stopped signing as he burst into tears.

“Hey, hey,” Lucius said. “Tyler…”

The small boy practically threw himself against the supervillain. Lucius tightly hugged him, trying to whisper words of comfort, though he didn’t exactly know why he was comforting him.

He decided to find out: “Why don’t you want me to go outside?”

Tyler pulled back and tearfully signed, ‘I don’t want you to get hurt.’

allenbert  asked:

also "i’m too short to put the star on top of the tree." or "you’re too short to put the star on top of the tree." because julian IS too short to put the star on top of the tree!!

WHEN WILL THIS HEIGHT DIFFERENCE STOP BEING AMUSING TO ME? NEVER

Barry finds this situation to be extremely amusing. Julian doesn’t want to admit it, but he can feel him growing angrier every second that passes. He’s staring up to the Christmas tree, with one fist clenched and on his other hand he’s holding the gold star.

“Admit it,” Barry says, laughing, “you’re too short to put the star on top of the tree.”

I’m not!” Julian snaps immediately. Barry laughs harder. “It’s just–this bloody tree is too big!”

“It’s not. I can reach the top with no problems,” he comments, knowing damn well it’s making his boyfriend’s blood boil. What was up with short people? Why did they always react like that when they were reminded of their height. “Do you want me to help you?”

“No, I can do it,” he says.

“I’d love to see that.”

Julian glares at him. His boyfriend suddenly turned into a little ball of anger, and Barry still finds it to be hilarious.

He tries everything — he tries on his tiptoes, he tries to drag down the tree, but it doesn’t work. He sighs deeply, and with his dignity in shreds, he says, “I’m too short to put the star on top of the tree.”

Barry stands up, and in a flash, he puts it on top of the tree. Julian pouts. “I hate tall people.”

“I love you, though.”

“Good to know,” Julian smirks. “I hate you and your tallness.”

“You’re too tiny to be so full of anger!”

Julian gives him a death stare. Barry laughs harder than he’s done before.

anonymous asked:

May I request a scenario of a younger Aizawa and his s/o, where his s/o makes him sign a paper that says if he doesn't find anyone in the next 10 years he'd have to go on a date with them. Please and thank you.

Sure thing! I hope I could write it well enough =)


Aizawa feels amused as he glances at their serious and satisfied face before he signs the paper. Putting away his pencil, he looks at them.

“You know.” He says and halts them in the process of putting the signed paper away. “I don’t think we have to wait ten years.”

They blink at him and he watches as his words register. They look surprised and for a moment even slightly unsure, as if they wonder if they interpreted his words correctly.

Placing a hand over theirs, he leans towards them and presses a light kiss to their cheek.

“Go out with me?” He asks when he moves back a little, giving them a small smile.

Okay so Newt returns to give Tina the book/reunite with friends. He visits Jacob’s bakery, amused at the shapes, buys pretty much the whole shop because he knows his creatures would love them.
He turns to go, when he hears “Hey mister! Mister English guy!”
He turns, hoping he paid correctly (muggle money is confusing, but now this is AMERICAN money??)
But Jacob’s there, holding out Newt’s money.
“It’s on the house, buddy.”
“Excuse me?” Newt asks, confused.
“This is all because of you, ain’t it. This place, I mean. I can’t… I can’t take your money.”
Newt smiles cautiously.
“I’m sorry, do- do you know me, Mr.Kowalski?” He asks, watching Jacob’s brow furrow slightly.
“Yes. No. I don’t know. Maybe.” Jacob says.
Newt smiles.

11 Things Chuuya Does When He’s Drunk

title: 11 things chuuya does when he’s drunk
pairing: dazai/chuuya
words: 2634
summary: he causes a scene that Hirotsu kind of wants to record, just for the sake of reminding himself that he should never invite Chuuya-san out for drinks again, and maybe also because it’s kind of amusing to watch.
notes: i know i’m not funny. based on this video that anon sent me i hope you’re happy anon

[ on ao3 ]

Witch Story Chapter 1

in collaboration with dear @hisokasnipplepastries

since I’m uploading so much from our OC story, it might be nice for all of you to know the beginning of the story. it introduces the 4 most important characters.

I don’t know how long chapter 2 is going to take, since we’re still in the middle of world building, but I think chapter 1 is already fairly amusing on it’s own.

I might change some things over time, since I’m never satisfied enough.
Please tell me what you think about it!

Keep reading

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEOKJIN!! I just want to say that jin makes me so happy, i’m so glad that he is a part of bts because it wouldn’t be the same without him. He is so amazing, his self-confidence is great because he has so much love for himself and im glad he does💕 His dad jokes are realy iconic and it’s so cute because he finds them so amusing and he always wants to make people laugh. I just hope people see him for more than his looks but his talents and qualities as well. I’m so proud of what he has accomplished and releasing a solo song and showing everyone how beautiful his voice is. I love him so much, I hope he has a good birthday and many more to come in the future with his boys.

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Aaron Tveit as Danny Zuko + wardrobe