he's trying to learn how to stalk

prince in training

~3k, rated T

Sterek ficlet inspired by this: “i grew up not knowing i was royal and now i guess i’m heir to a throne and you’re the guy who’s supposed to be teaching me how to be royal bc i suck at it and oops we made out” au

This is kind of Princess-Diaries-ish. I know that’s been done before in this fandom (and thank god it has—it’s awesome), but I couldn’t help myself. Yay for self-indulgence!

*

Stiles thought the most annoying thing about suddenly being a royal heir to a small eastern European kingdom he’s never heard of would be the hyper-aggressive paparazzi, but he was dead wrong.

The most annoying thing is actually Derek Hale, the guy Stiles’ grandmother hired to teach Stiles how not to screw this up.

“Princes don’t chew with their mouths open, Stiles.”

“Princes don’t shove an entire fistful of curly fries in their mouths, Stiles.”

“Princes don’t wear pink-and-green plaid shirts from Target, Stiles.”

“Princes don’t slouch.”

They don’t slump, either, or yawn or sneeze or cough in public, or fist-pump, or drive beat-up old blue Jeeps, or wear bright colors, or rock out to the radio, or do anything fun.

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In case you missed it... Pt 1

Gallavich moment 1: The Meeting– 1x03

This IS your spoiler warning. All of these posts will include spoilers from ALL 7 seasons.

So, something I’m certain is less than palatable for critics is how these two met. I’m certain so many people were turned off by their story because of violence–which is fair! Even the cast portrays the violence in their arc as bigger than it actually is. (SIDENOTE, I am NOT condoning violence of any kind in real life relationships. This is a TV drama that takes place in a world that I personally have no understanding of and I’m certain many of the fans have no understanding of. The premise of the show is that they are living in a ghetto area where the rules are different than the society I know I was raised in, and while this is not an excuse for any form of violence, it explains a lot and demands a sort of bend in typical rules; this is the premise I base my analysis on).

They meet on violent terms and maybe that got people unsettled to begin with? However, in case people missed it: Mickey was chasing Ian/threatening Ian because Mandy lied and told her brothers he raped her. I think this is a pretty realistic reaction for all different kinds of people. A lot of people don’t trust cops to handle situations like this or just feel the need to take matters into their own hands in general.

To remind: Mandy tried to jump Ian who is 100% gay and had no interest in her, and also has 0 backbone for telling  her to kindly fuck off.


When he does put his foot down, she flees the Gallagher house and tells her brother(s) (Mickey) that Ian raped her. Mickey and his brothers then hunt for Ian providing us with two of the most dynamic and effective character introductions on TV.

These shots established two things.

1. Mickey and his brothers are badasses (not in the complimentary way, like literally they are badasses and are not to be fucked with). Now, their introduction is a violent one and obviously we are scared for Ian because *WE* know he didn’t do anything; BUT let’s not get angry at Mickey just yet. He is trying to avenge an alleged sexual assault which he had every reason to believe occurred. The Milkoviches would never go to the police because they are usually the ones being picked up by the police, so could you imagine any of them calling an officer to their aid or any officer who frequents the Milkovich house giving their best effort to help? 

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

Yeah, me neither. This is just one example of many that establishes what world they live in–one in which the rules of our perceived society with a foundation of law and order (one in which we call the cops when something goes wrong and can trust that they will/can help) don’t apply. In this world, you handle your problems yourself and often times you handle those problems with violence. If you as an audience member don’t like it, it’s probably because you recognize that it is an accurate depiction of life in neighborhoods like this, and it makes you uncomfortable knowing that there are communities like this. Which is the point.

So here Mickey is taking matters into his own hands to defend his sister (arguably an admirable action). He then spends the whole episode hunting Ian down.

This further shows how devoted he is to the people he loves. Obviously, this is a good and bad thing. Good because fierce devotion is rarely a bad thing and is usually an admirable quality. Bad because when this degree of devotion is bad, it’s usually because of a disregard for limits to what they will do for someone–including having no reservations for breaking the law.

Like tagging, assault, and stalking. The moral standing of this is debatable due to two major factors: 1. Mickey is trying to avenge his sister’s rape (the fact that it didn’t actually happen holds no weight against Mickey because he believed it was true). Had the assault actually happened, I feel like Mickey’s actions in this episode would not have been challenged as strongly. 2. His background. Though it shouldn’t excuse him, it would be an incomplete analysis to ignore how he was raised and how he learned to deal with his problems. If this were real life, these things would never excuse him, though could explain his actions so we would understand them, muddling the morality of the specific actions. I think that is a huge distinction that needs to be made: excusing versus understanding. Hopefully I am not the only person who has encountered people who say and do things that are wrong (though maybe not quite to the degree Shameless sinks to for virtually all of their characters) and while I don’t excuse these actions or statements, I may try to understand their perspective with the hope that some day that perspective will change and these offenses will become fewer and further in-between (as they did with Mickey throughout the series). 

I feel another reason some people don’t receive Mickey well is because he beats up Lip (though let’s face it, the smart mouth was kind of asking for a punch with his comeback about Mandy).

*Note, Karen backing away from him because she knows what’s coming. I mean, who can honestly expect to say something like that to even a reasonable person and not get hit? Say it to the neighborhood thug who scares grown-ass men and you’re not walking away with only a single punch.

 Lip fans may resent him for beating up Lip and scaring Ian just as I resent Ian for leaving Mickey at the border, but I will also understand Mickey’s perspective because the writers had to stay true to the world they live in. 

Finally, the chase is called off when Ian comes out to Mandy who promises not to say anything to anyone, and even offers to be a faux girlfriend so no one gets suspicious. This sparks a friendship that is questionable to say the least, but still one of the better aspects of the show (especially within Ian’s and Mickey’s plotlines). At this point in the show, Mickey and Mandy exist solely as accessory characters for Ian’s plotline, but clearly those roles are important because otherwise I wouldn’t be here typing up this masterpost to counter-argue criticism against Mickey and Gallavich. 

That’s all I’ve got for 1x03, but please feel free to reblog to add anything I may have missed or even counter-argue! Or show some love if you agree. 

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I'm A Little Awkward, But Most People Like Me

Pairing: Yixing/Baekhyun
Rating: pg-13
Genre: online friendship? 

Summary: Baekhyun’s a little awkward, spends too much time reading smutty gay fanfiction, and doesn’t think twice before flying across the country to meet his favorite author.

Originally posted by junyeol


He’s staring at the screen, the little line blinking, taunting him. He wants to say something. Anything. But what? Is it weird if he just gushes? Can he do that? Hi you don’t know me but I love ur fics and ur a great writer and i think i love you please be my friend. He quickly backspaces. “Definitely can’t send that.”

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anonymous asked:

Hello, I love your lettering works! Would you mind if I ask about the process? Also are you self taught? Is there a source I could look up to learn? Sorry if this sounds pestering, but I just admire your lettering and art works so I'm curious and would love to learn as well, if not as well as you :) Thank you in advance.

Hello! you are making me blush and thanks for asking this! I’m going to take my time to answer (which means I’m going to extend a bit…) 

So yes, I’m self-taught (I’m a graphic designer but sadly learnt nothing about this in college) I started by myself reading tutorials and tracing letters from book covers and everything I could find with nice letters, but when I found the work of David A. Smith, (I’m linking here to his website) I decided to adopt him as my sensei, which means stalking him on every social network and trying to find every single piece of his work, and he’s on Instagram where he posts the process of his pieces, so I learnt (and I’m still learning) mainly from it: from looking how the whole thing is constructed, from comparing the process pics with the final artwork to try to understand how everything is layered and drawn. SO you’ll notice that what I’ve been doing to the date is heavily inspired by his work. Now for further inspiration I always go to this blog that has authentic pieces from the mid 18th to early 19th century (that is the period style I like for my stuff). I go there for composition ideas, color palettes and letterforms.

Now about the process, I’ll explain how I usually do it with examples from the last thing I did, which was the Mrs Hudson Tea label:

1. To the left is the inspiration.

2. And to the right (if you can see anything, sorry) is the first sketch just to put on paper de idea of what I had in mind for the composition and establish the main elements that make up the whole thing: a. Mrs Hudson portrait, b. the name “Mrs Hudson”, c. “of Baker Street, d. “English Breakfast Tea”

3. I did some more sketches in receipts… and now I can’t find them anywhere but they were mainly to try and define the style of the letterforms for each of the elements and see if they looked good together.

4. The next step was doing a more detailed sketch to know where to put everything, the size of the letters, if there’s enough contrast, if the letters really look good together, and which size they have to be (which means erasing a lot, but that’s why a detailed sketch before doing the final artwork is important, because you can’t erase as you want in the final thing without messing everything) And in the pic you can see annotations at the sides, that is where I count how many letters has every word, to don’t miss any letter when drawing them and to know how much space I need and have for each word.

5. So after some meditation to get myself in the right mental state to tackle the final artwork, comes preparing and drawing the structure for the whole thing, I like to take my time for this and make sure I have guidelines for everything to know where to put all the elements later and avoid erasing as much as posible.

6. Here you see I work for areas, finishing completely each part to avoid smudging from coming back and drawing it by bits, so when I finish one area I can cover it and keep it s a f e. Of course I go back and add some details in the process but is much more safe this way.

7. And I just keep going and take some breaks when I feel my hand or arm is feeling tired to prevent having shaky and hairy lines that later are hard to fix, so when I start to feel like I can’t draw full and clear strokes I know is time to stop. This drawing took me about a week but mostly because I had work to do, but if I had worked fully on it would have taken me a couple of days. And there at the beginning of the gif you can see how the finished drawing looks without the colors.

8. Then I scan it, and tweak the contrast, brightness and all that in Photoshop. In this case I colored it, keeping a three color palette (as this was the first time I colored one of this things) then I added an overall color to merge everything together and some texture, a soft vignette and voilà! 

I hope this gives you a general (and somehow clear) idea of the process, if you have any other question feel free to ask or you can send me a dm if you want, oh! and I’m about to start with another lettering thing, so I could make a more detailed tutorial or step by step explaining how to form and draw different letter shapes, that is what I can’t never find in tutorials and I think is a technical aspect that is important to understand when you are starting to get into this, so if someone is interested let me know :)

Meanwhile, here’s a nice tutorial to begin with

Being the daughter of Thor would include…

Being the daughter of Thor would include…

Originally posted by peke-world

[Age:1-10]

  • “OH GOd what is this BEAST!?”
  • “It’s your child sir,”
  • Playing dress-up
  • Being the only one who can play with his hair
  • You’re grandfather hating you at first
  • You grew on him
  • Wearing a cape on your first day of preschool
  • “If any of these little beasts lay a hand on you, i will bash their skulls in,”
  • “Okay, See you later daddy,”
  • All the PTA moms trying to flirt with him

[Age: 10-20]

  • “(Y/n) isn’t that you’re dad?”
  • “OMG? Dad what are you doing here?”
  • The PTA moms still trying to flirt with him
  • “How do you work this object?”
  • “Dad, that’s a microwave, you heat up food with it,”
  • Him freaking out when you first learn how to drive
  • Being left at the Avengers tower when ever he has to go to asgard for important matters
  • “Stark you’ve corrupted my child!”
  • “How? Steve took care of her most of the time,”
  • “She’s fallen in love with that spider boy!”
  • Tony and Thor becoming best friends while they stalk you both
  • “Mr. stark and you’re father are watching, my spider senses are..”
  • “Shut up,”
  • Steve being the only thing preventing them from killing peter when you kiss him

[Age: 20]

  • “Steve you said it was a phase,”
  • “Yeah, he has a habit of saying that,”
  • Thor glaring at peter as he walks you down the aisle
  • Him crying a little as you both say your vows
  • “I’m getting that feeling again,”
  • “They’ll get over it,”
  • Him crying a lot when you two (You and Thor) dance at the reception
  • “Why are you crying dad?”
  • “Because, my baby girl is all grown up and has married a boy who calls himself a spider,”
  • “I love you too dad, i love you too,”
An Owed Debt- Bucky x May(oc)  Chapter 6

Authors notes: This one gets a little wordy, coming in over 2K words but I felt like breaking it up wouldn’t work. so, here you go.

Notes/warnings: I honestly can’t think of any it’s a pretty mild chapter, but if any of you do, please let me know.

Originally posted by closer-to-the-edge-of-glory

“No, you’re wrong.” May said down at the file in her hands. “This never happened to my dad, he would have told me.”

 Tony shifted his weight and Steve crossed his arms. May flipped through the pages, for probably the seventh time, and then slapped the file closed. She held out the file for Tony to take but he didn’t move so, she tossed it onto the kitchen counter, repulsed by it’s contents.

 “Look, I’m sorry he never told you but I’m not wrong about this. It happened. He was…different and so are you.”

 “No.” May glared. “You’re wrong.”

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nimsona  asked:

Hi! What about an MC thats a Swede but lives in korea now for whatever reason? Also maybe got some home sickness even now and then?

🐙 Yoosung
- Would think it’s awesome
- Probably play a lot of Swedish games and if its not in Korean or English ask you to translate it lol
- He would also try to cook some traditional meals if you were feeling homesick
- And he’d cuddle you until you were feeling okay again

💎 Jumin
- Would want to know everything about the culture
- He’d hire a Swedish chef since him cooking isn’t a very good idea lmao
- If you were feeling homesick he’d just book a flight to Sweden bc why the heck not lol
- Or would just let your family come over no biggie

✨ Zen
- He’d think it’s soooo cool
- He would probably google what Sweden looks like
- “ Yes Sweden is beautiful but not as beautiful as you”
- Yes very smooth Zen
- Would lookup Swedish musicals and try to sing along
- If you were feeling homesick he would cuddle you and sing to you until you fell asleep

☕️ Jaehee
- She would try to learn Swedish
- It would take a while but she’d succeed
- Probably texts you randomly in Swedish
- “ Once I get a few weeks off work we can go on holiday there”
- Couple goals ngl
- If you were feeling homesick she’d listen to you rambling about why you’re feeling homesick and she would hug you doing cute shit yanno

🔮 Seven
- Psh of course he already knew
- I mean he stalked you
- Would learn how to speak Swedish in no time
- Download Swedish movies and have a marathon
- If you were feeling homesick he’d make ‘funny’ jokes in Swedish
- Show you memes some in Swedish aswell

3

Ethan x Reader

Requested By Anon




Ethan walked away victoriously. He’d asked you out, the only problem now was that he had no idea what he should be doing. He’d arranged the date for later that week only to realise he’d now be stuck making awkward conversation with you, not that he didn’t like the thought, just he really didn’t want to come off like a stuttering fool.


 

“You alright… (Y/N) turn you down?” Aiden laughed when he saw his brother.


“Nope, just trying to remain calm and level headed.” Ethan grunted back.


“Why (Y/N) likes you?” Aiden chuckled.

 


“Yeah but I might screw something up, how do you do it?” He asked Aiden how chuckled again.


 

“Come on, (Y/N) has study group I’ll help you practise.” He muttered while jerking his head towards the school library.

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Love and Manuscripts (2)

This is the second chapter of my new fic! Let me know what you think :) Previous chapter listed here: 1

Simon

Simon shifted uncomfortably in his chair. His cubicle was quite small and stress was making it difficult for him to get comfortable. He’d been working for two weeks at Petty Publishing so far and had become a kind of copy making pet. Anyone who needed something delivered or copied handed their things off to Simon. While the situation wasn’t the best he liked it better than Baz’s new role. Baz had become the office’s coffee and errand boy.
But today both he and Baz had reason to be nervous. They’d handed in edits of a manuscript last week to Penny. It wasn’t like their edits would be taken seriously, it was just practice. But Penny was supposed to discuss their edits with them today and tell them how they did.
Baz drifted into the office, his grey eyes glinting with frustration. Without a word he handed Simon his coffee and sat at the desk across from him. There was nothing separating them except for desktop screens.
“Thanks for the coffee.”
Baz sneered, “It’s my job isn’t it?”
Simon shook his head in annoyance and went back to organizing Gareth’s papers. Simon had tried to be polite for the most part but Baz was still just as acerbic as he’d been the day they’d met.
Simon bit his lip nervously and checked his watch.
“She’s in a meeting. Stop fidgeting it’s making it hard to focus,” Baz muttered.
Simon glared at him.
“How can you act so calm? Don’t you want to stop running around getting coffees? If we mess this up we’ll be stuck doing this crap for another two weeks.”
Baz smirked, “Well, unlike you, I know I did a good job.”
Simon rolled his eyes and went back to ignoring Baz.
A few minutes later Penny strolled in, her purple hair sleeked to perfection. It was disconcerting still for Simon to see someone so young already be so powerful.
“Hello boys,” She greeted them, lips pursed.
“Hello,” Simon smiled politely.
Baz simply nodded.
“Simon, your edits were not as attentive as I would have liked. While I agree with all of the things you pointed out, there were many more mistakes in the writing that you should have caught.”
Baz snorted quietly and gave Simon a thumbs up.
Penny’s sharp eyes cut to him.
“I wouldn’t be so cocky Basilton. You’re edits were far too harsh. I found many of the things you pointed to as mistakes to be completely fine. I’m not sure why you feel the need to be so nit picky.”
Simon was too focused on thinking about his own edits to enjoy the look of defeat on Baz’s face. He wondered what exactly he’d missed and how he’d been stupid enough to mess something so important up.
“Simon, your critiques, though lacking in consistency, were well articulated. Basilton, while I think you were far too harsh, your sharp eye for mistakes is definitely note-worthy. I feel you both have something to learn from one another.”
Simon nodded though he wasn’t entirely sure where she was going with this.
“I want you two to trade manuscripts and try to pick up on the strengths and weaknesses of the other person. Have a report ready for me by tomorrow at 8.”
Baz glanced up at her in disbelief.
“It’s almost the end of the day, how are we supposed to get this done by then?”
She shrugged.
“I guess you’re working late. Welcome to publishing.”
With that she stalked off towards her office. Simon didn’t really want to stay late, especially with Baz, but he had known early on to expect strange work hours from this job.
Baz sighed and flung his manuscript copy at Simon.
“Let’s get this over with.”

Baz

Baz sighed in relief as he finished reading the last of Snow’s edits. It was well past midnight and he was pretty sure they might be locked in the building. He looked up and saw that Snow wasn’t too far off from finishing reading Baz’s edits.
He hated to admit it but Penny had a point. Snow definitely wasn’t catching on enough to a lot of the mistakes. But every mistake he did point out had a well-reasoned explanation and a suggestion for how to fix it. Baz had never thought of delivering such personalized edits.
He waited until Snow finished and then cleared his throat.
“So, she’s right, you missed a lot of what’s wrong with the manuscript.”
Snow sighed tiredly and nodded.
“I get it Baz, I’m the worst editor ever.”
Baz clenched his teeth. He really didn’t want to compliment him but he had to do as Penny had asked and point out both Snow’s weaknesses and his strengths.
“Let me finish,” He snapped at Snow, “She was right about that but she was also right about the good stuff. Your edits are clear and well structured. Obviously you put a lot of thought into them.”
Snow’s eyes widened in surprise.
“I think that’s the first nice thing you’ve ever said to me.”
Baz snorted.
“Don’t get used to it. Our boss ordered me to do it.”
Snow rolled his eyes but didn’t respond. Instead he looked back through Baz’s edits with a thoughtful expression. As Baz watched him he noticed freckles dusted over the bridge of Snow’s nose that were a few shades lighter than his moles. Baz had traditionally thought of moles as unattractive but they actually complimented Snow’s features. They reminded him of constellations, seemingly random but capable of more with the right set of eyes. His mouth was interesting too, his lower lip being just a little bit bigger than his upper lip. Baz briefly considered what it would be like to suck on it. Then he froze and shook his head.
What was he thinking? There was no way he found this stubborn prat attractive. No Baz assured himself I’m just tired. As he was trying to clamp down his wayward thoughts Snow cleared his throat and smiled at Baz.
“Okay so yeah, you’re way too harsh. Half of these things are totally unnecessary on your part. But…you have a hell of an eye for this stuff. I mean you caught things I would have never noticed.”
Baz felt his ears heat.
“Okay. Good to know.”
He didn’t understand why he felt this affected by Snow telling him something Penny had already pointed out. But he couldn’t deny the warm satisfaction that Snow’s words had brought on. Disturbed, he stood up.
“I’m going to go home. See you tomorrow,” He mumbled.
“Hey, wait for a minute. I’ll walk out with you.”
Baz waved Snow off.
“It’s fine. I really just want to go home.”
He stalked off without another look back. Baz couldn’t allow himself to be attracted to Snow. There was no way he’d let himself fall for someone as stupid and senseless as him. Plus, they were competing for a job. There was no reason to complicate an already sticky situation. Right?

anonymous asked:

17 and 18 with Tony Stark please 😊

Your reflection smiled back at you as you twirled in front of the mirror, examining the way your dress hugged your features. A figure loomed behind you and you turned, your smile faltering. Tony stood there, leaning against the frame of your door with a soft look on his face. An embarrassed flush fell on your cheeks.

“Ignore me,” he said. “I didn’t see anything.”

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sorandomlove  asked:

34&35 rowaelin ;)

oh my god you’re going to be the reason i go to hell i love it

“If you keep looking at me like that we won’t make it to a bed.” + “You heard me. Take. It. Off.”


Aelin watched Rowan across the meeting table, bored to tears after another full day of organizing festivities and arranging guards. Come to think of it, the only times she’d been able to speak with him lately was at night when she went to her grand, private chambers to sleep by his comforting side. And that was all they did, really. She was so tired every night she barely had the energy to peel off her dresses and climb into bed.

But oh, she missed being active. She was stressed and hungry and craving the delicious chocolate cake Emrys had learned how to make almost every hour of the day.

She glanced away, trying to focus on the matter at hand, but once more found herself gazing at Rowan. He looked back at her, an unusual sort of intensity in his fair green eyes. She let herself admire the patch of chest showing through the unbuttoned top half of his shirt, the muscle and scars beneath it making her ache to run her hands over him. It took a lot of will in her not to stalk over to him right then and there and push him against the nearest wall. 

“Aelin.”

She jumped out of her thoughts, where she’d been blatantly staring at her carranam, now noticing that everyone had left the room, and Rowan was no longer by the corner, but behind her. The Fae warrior lifted his big hands to her shoulders, massaging some of the tension out of them. “You have another meeting in twenty minutes.”

Frustrated in every way possible, she huffed, “It’s not fair. I haven’t gotten to take Fleetfoot out for even a walk, let alone train, and–and I just feel like I need to do something.”

“Welcome to being a queen,” he whispered by her ear, smirking.

Aelin felt like screaming. “Gods, and this stupid corset is so tight I can barely breathe.”

Rowan moved in front of her, sitting on the edge of the mahogany table. He shrugged. “Then take it off.”

She raised her eyebrows at him. “You’re not serious.”

Rowan grabbed a handful of the maroon material on her dress and pulled her to his body with surprising strength. “You heard me. Take. It. Off.”

Aelin’s heart lurched in her chest, heat racing through her body. Slowly, ever so slowly, she began pulling on the threads that constricted her body from behind, damning it all to hell that anyone could burst through the door at any second. She kept her face close to Rowan’s, but never touching. She teased him with a small smile, coming close to his neck and breathing in what was now her favorite smell—pine and snow. When she drew back, the amount of lust in his eyes made her want to cancel every meeting left that day.

“If you keep looking at me like that,” Rowan purred, outlining the material that framed her chest with his hands, “we won’t make it to a bed.”

Aelin pushed Rowan back farther on the council table, the corset finally undone, and a wicked smile forming on her face. “I don’t intend to.”

I don’t think I’ve ever posted something this early in the morning but I couldn’t sleep and I don’t write bantering Rafael nearly enough.

Masterlist 

Since you mentioned you’re a runner would you please write an imagine with Barba and running? :D


“I think I’m dying.”

You laughed at his overly dramatic words, “You’re not dying. We’ve barely gone two miles.”

“No, seriously, I’m not going to make it, cariño,” His theatrics continued as he stopped running, placing one hand on his knee while the other stretched out towards you, “Leave me here, go on without me. But just promise that you’ll always remember me.”

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Why Angel isn’t Edward: a Meta

First off, Liam and Angelus are indeed different characters and entirely different beings. In addition, Angelus does not have either Liam or Angel in him. However, Angel has Angelus in his head all the time and it does affect him. He’s literally his own worst enemy. Angel is the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde of vampires.

Angel has MASSIVE differences from Edward.

Angel would never dream of letting Buffy become a vampire and they both would rather have her die naturally over that option. Part of this is indeed a critical difference in the mythology. It’s not glamorous to live forever in the Jossverse like it is in Twilight and a major part of that is because the demon isn’t actually you! If you remove this element to the mythology, you’re making it Twilight and there would be no reason to fear becoming a vampire so much. Joss Whedon was emphatic about vampirism not being something you wanted. There is no motivation in his universe to want it as a “gift” if you know what it really entails. Lie to Me collapses as an episode if you view vampirism as immortality for the human, rather than being body-snatched by a demon. Angel will never, ever, ever consider what Darla did to him as a gift; he views it often in very religious terms as damnation.

That time that you see him in Buffy’s bedroom while she slept being creepy? Yeah, that wasn’t actually Angel. That was his murderous, soulless alter ego Angelus, who is the most vicious and effective Big Bad the franchise ever had. It was meant to be creepy. This same scene has turned up with both Edward and Damon, but in an entirely opposite context. He left a picture of Buffy’s mother Joyce as a gift to say that he could have killed them both in their sleep. He then snapped Jenny Calendar’s neck in the same episode and left her in Buffy’s Watcher Rupert Giles’ bed after setting it up to look like a romantic evening. He then enjoys watching everyone cry. Angelus is not a sweetheart and Angel has that dark prince in his head whispering to him, fighting him for dominance and unable to act on those desires as if in a cage (made literal in his own show).

Angel also had the balls to stand up to Buffy and say that he didn’t want her life to be with him and followed through with it. Edward exhibits no such behavior. Angel was very clear right up front with Buffy starting in Angel that their relationship couldn’t be and wouldn’t end well. He may have let Buffy have the reins for a while and gave in (he wanted it so much, but let himself enjoy it only until he got a wake-up call that he wasn’t allowed to enjoy it), but he was never so emasculated that he couldn’t recognize there was more waiting for his existence besides ruining her life.

And that’s another thing… Angel stands on his own as an equal to Buffy because he has a hero’s journey and destiny of his own and is a leader in his own right. This is contrary to Edward and Bella where Edward has complete control of everything and Bella is a doormat. Buffy is not a doormat like Bella and is also a superhero with a journey separate from Angel’s in her own right as well. Neither are subservient to the other. Both save the world from entirely separate apocalypses, fight foes and face trials and tribulations that have nothing to do with the other show. Lilah Morgan writes off Buffy as unimportant when she gives Angel the amulet that defeats her last Big Bad. The First Evil’s apocalypse had a scheduling conflict with Wolfram & Hart’s! Buffy should be writing thank yous!

Actually, this is the one thing that Angel also has over Spike: Spike is still very subservient to Buffy in a way that Angel never was even when he was on her show. Angel’s paternalistic side does come in for criticism, but it’s not like Buffy isn’t capable of being a leader or making decisions. It’s critical that Buffy acknowledges that Angel was right about their relationship when she cries about the breakup to Willow. That’s the difference. And Angel is usually the first to point out that Buffy is physically stronger than he is. Buffy is not Bella, Elena, Sookie, etc… She’s a physically strong, mystical superbeing in her own right.

Angel has the intellectual wisdom of his years, even if he’s emotionally frozen/regressed due to both vampirism having a tendency to freeze you at the age you were and his catastrophic circumstances where he got emotionally shattered with the weight of his soul and lack of human contact. Angel never even attempts to fit in with humans as one of them when he’s courting Buffy. This is distinctly different from both Edward and Stefan attending school and pretending to be a teenager. Angel is too old for that shit and acknowledges it. Angel is also a lot older and more mature than Edward and Stefan and acts it in other ways.

But he’s also had much lower lows and is more of an antisocial basketcase, not because that’s his actual personality (Liam and Angelus are actually quite extroverted personalities and the actor himself is extroverted) and the girls like it (it’s usually them trying to pull him out of his funk), but because of what he’s actually been through. Angel is not “emo” because it’s cool and he’s not mysterious for the sake of women; this image of him shatters when he can’t answer Buffy’s question of whether he knows what it’s like to have a friend. Angel was an extrovert who became an introvert because of circumstances. Between him having a life-altering catastrophic event (regaining his soul) causing him to be a social disaster and the sheer ass-kicking he regularly dishes out, there’s nothing trendily “emo” about the character at all.

This is a character with 145 years of eidetic memories of being one of the sickest mass-murderers known as the Scourge of Europe and a further 98 years of avoiding people (and when he didn’t, it usually went wrong such as the time he made a friend and got hanged in the Hyperion Hotel’s lobby when the paranoia demon there turned everyone against him as a monster). He then added yet another 100 years being reduced to a feral state in a hell dimension and it was mentioned as remarkable for him to ever regain higher brain function at all (he also had a nice summer vacation at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean by his own son). He’s a whole lot older than most of the vampires he gets compared to, did much worse deeds and his life makes theirs look happy.

He’s “the vampire with the big brass testes” who is often willing to sacrifice his own life to save even a syphilitic 400-year-old ex-vampire, sell his soul to an evil law firm to save his suicidal son, give up his own chances at humanity for Buffy’s life and to take out Wolfram & Hart, go on a kamikaze mission to take out the Senior Partners or take L.A. to hell with him when he takes them down. He’s naturally an Alpha Male. He’s a beefy jock. And you can’t help but notice that you could fit several Robert Pattinsons in one David Boreanaz. He’s a big man and decidedly not a boy. Even when he was young, Big Dave wasn’t young-girls-who-prefer-boyish-Betas friendly.

While the Fang Gang goes to great lengths to try to humanize Angel and bring him into the human world, he remains quite separated from the mortal coil in endless ways. No matter how Buffy or Cordy might try again and again to make him more human, he isn’t. There’s only so much he can pretend until he can’t. He learned the lesson that he can’t fully pretend to be human the hard way when being with Buffy and feeling like a normal young man in love meant that he lost his soul. Angel lives in constant fear of letting himself forget that he’s not human.

Angel wasn’t even stalking Buffy just because he liked her or lusted for her. Whistler gave him a mission from the Powers that Be to help her.

He was reluctant to get any closer than he had to, hence why he actively avoids Buffy until she starts getting on him for only showing up once a month (she repeatedly says how she wants to see him around more when he avoids her–that’s not stalking!) and only talking shop. And then Willow starts ragging on him about not having time for a cup of coffee. He was trying to keep it as a professional mission from the Powers that Be part way into season 2 and actually has a conversation with Giles where he says that he can’t be around Buffy because he is emotionally compromised in his mission.

That would be like claiming that Angel is creepily stalking every single person Doyle or Cordy is given a vision about (granted, that’s exactly what does happen with Tina when she finds that he had her name and place of work, which ends horribly). It’s his JOB to help people the Powers that Be tell him to help. Without Whistler, Angel would have been right back in that Manhattan alley eating rats. It’s not Angel’s fault that the Powers that Be chose to have Whistler take him to Hemery High School to see Buffy being called as a Slayer. Angel was not expecting a young, innocent girl with her life falling apart (he empathized with her–that’s where he got compromised) at all by his own admission (see both Fool For Love and Welcome to the Hellmouth where he mentions his pre-Buffy preconceptions of what Slayers are supposed to be–pretty much the bogeyman and “taller, or bigger muscles and all that”).

The parallel falls apart even further.

Angel doesn’t stalk people, Buffy included, merely for his own enjoyment. He does it because he has a higher calling where he’s told to go places and help people.

And one of those Powers that Be who was sending him on all of those missions, Jasmine, tries to enslave humanity some years later, taking credit for most of the miracles and manipulations of his and his friends’ lives. He chooses human free will with the choice to destroy themselves over her offer of world peace that saves more lives (by making them happy meat-puppets hunting down dissenters at the cost of her devouring a few of her devout followers). Wolfram & Hart thanks Angel for ending world peace.

In BtVS season 3, Angel is very much already doing his own thing when it comes to saving Faith. In fact, he is dealing with the situation as soon as Deputy Mayor Allan Finch ends up dead. He saves Xander from Faith because of his detective work, which included smelling Finch’s blood on Buffy’s hand. Angel spends time in BtVS season 3 and AtS season 1 trying to save Faith because he’s the only one who has any chance to get through to her. Buffy didn’t have a clue how to handle Faith, actually gave up on her and continued to distrust her, while Angel never gave up on saving her soul, visited her in prison and Wesley came around even after he was tortured. He infiltrated the Mayor and Faith’s confidence and learned of the Mayor’s invincibility and Faith’s turn to the dark side. He then is the one who discovers the Mayor’s biggest weakness (he told that the Mayor was grief-stricken over Faith at the hospital when everyone else had nothing).

Angel began to see himself as having a mission beyond Buffy when the magic snow miracle saved him. The Mayor specifically also refers to Angel being brought back from hell for a purpose that had nothing to do with Buffy. Angel, vampire detective, was born on BtVS, as was Angel beginning his own separate mission to save souls.

While Angel gets his very own miracle child the same as Edward does, Angel’s is with his murderous demonic ex Darla and she ends up staking herself to bring Connor into the world. While Darla does have a redemption, she doesn’t get to enjoy it. Angel also doesn’t get a happy ending and a child with the actual love of his life either. One of the reasons that Angel broke up with Buffy (discussed numerous times in Bad Eggs, The Prom and Chosen) was that children would not be in their future if she ever grew up and someday decided she wanted them.

The Jossverse is not written as wish-fulfillment. When you get what you want most, it is usually quickly taken away or perverted.

The other vampire lovers don’t have missions or separate journeys beyond being love interests in a romantic plot. The other vampire lovers aren’t endlessly Prophecy’s Bitch. Angel doesn’t get handed everything he’s ever wanted on a silver platter and have it actually end well. His show ends with most of his friends dead or about to die and himself intending to go out in a blaze of glory in a rainy alley against the oncoming hordes of hell. That’s a huge difference.

wvldorf  asked:

26+65 with pan? :) love your imagines!

Author: peachyxpan

Warning(s): None

Requested: yES (#26: “Don’t test me.” and #65: “Punch me. I dare you.”)

Summary: Y/N wants to learn how to fight, but Pan forbids her and belittles what she is capable of. Y/N tries to fight Pan, but doesn’t have the heart to hurt him after all. Pan, who is feeling bad for her, decides to confront her later.

Words: 746

Notes: Thank you so much for requesting and reading my imagines! I hope you like this! 

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anonymous asked:

You know how people kick Ferid to the pedophile curb because he enjoys childrens blood? Well, maybe he just enjoys children because of the library he had for them and letting them learn things and read. Like they're a blank slate that won't fuck up the world anymore like the current humans bad. And I mean, He is a vampire and they like blood so ofc his personal interests and vampire interests would clash. Idk if this makes sense lol~ but

No! This makes perfect sense.

And yeah, I agree 100%. The thing I hate the most though, about the whole library situation, is how most of the fandom took something seemingly innocent and turned it into “oh he’s a creep stalking children”. The fact of the matter is that Ferid wants them to learn. In a sense he understands that children are the new generation, and if ever the vampire system of nobles fails or vanishes (cue Ferid is trying to destroy the vampire system), the children he teaches will be the ones who will be superior over the earth. That said, he wants them to learn. He wants them to know things about their culture and roots. He even mentioned in the Light Novel that while he himself was bored and uninterested in most things, he found it very important that children learn so they could be wise and knowledgable.

There is meaning behind Ferid opening the library. One meaning, like you and I pretty much summed up is that they are the new generation. The vampires are being set up to die, and to be wiped out, but at the same time, so is the JIDA force—meaning that the children Ferid teaches, will be superior amongst every other child in that chaotic world because those children have knowledge of thousands of years. Ferid is preparing them for that. And like you said specifically, they are a blank slate. Unlike most of the humans, excuse me, all of the humans we see now in OnS, the children are innocent. They don’t seek power, they aren’t bound to a system where they’ve delved into knowledge that doesn’t belonged to them. They aren’t selfish, they aren’t deceptive. They are blank slates. And they will be raised in a new sense that they will not grow to seek power, destruction, or selfishness—they’re going to grow to take care of the land that’s been destroyed by all of this. They will rebuild it, their children will rebuild it…etc..etc…

Ferid in a way, has set up a new and promosing generation. The dominion of humans who do not seek power, lust, greed, or anything of the sort. A dominion of children who will grow to preserve knowledge and the world alike, and pass such on to their children, and so on.

The whole idea of Ferid opening up a library with more than 1,000+ years of history and knowledge isn’t a pedophilic notion. Do some people not realize that because of the apocolpsyse and clash of the vampires, and rise of the Hiragi’s and JIDA, that many historical documents have probably been wiped out? Many events in history that hold great importance have been purged by the Hiragi’s or higher ranking vampires because they’re most likely seen as propaganda?

Ferid has most likely taken anything he could muster, from years and years of just walking the Earth. But those books, documents, etc., he doesn’t read them for himself. No he lived the history so naturally, he gives them to the children.

Ferid isn’t a “pedo” or “creeper” for opening the library. There are very important reasons as to why he did that. He knows the vampires will come to an end, as will the humans. He is preserving the new generation in hopes that they won’t fuck up. He’s the only noble and progenitor doing what he’s supposed to do. That is what the progenitors are supposed to do. Help guide humanity to betterment. So hell at least he gives a shit about the human race.

Verses another vampire who just wants to use them as seraph experiments along with a certain Hiragi/Ichinose.

As for Ferid liking the blood of children.

If you couldn’t tell by now, he strongly dislikes most of the children he sucks blood from. The only think appealing to them is their blood, other than that, they are disposable to them. Yes vampires have prefaces, just like Ferid does. And people really need to take into consideration that all he can eat/drink is blood. By the way he dislikes the children, I’m quite sure that if he could find another source of food, he would. But he can’t, and his preface is children’s blood. There are a lot of theories/ possible reasoning’s behind this. In folklore, vampires like virgin blood because it is “clean” and not dirty. Even Mika prefers virgin blood. And while not all virgins are children, that’s a little explanation. Another theory that me and a few friends came up with is that he has his innocence stolen from him at a young age, meaning that his thirst for children’s blood, is the result of mourning for his lost purity. Drinking the blood of children connect him back to the happy feelings of carelessness and joy when he was a child, before he was taken advantage of. It’s an attempt to feel “clean” again, and drinking the blood of a child is the closest he can get to it. But this also explains why he hates the blood of adults, because it was an adult who took away his innocence and he sees them as disgusting and such.

Also, back to Ferid disliking the children he drinks blood from, and I like this idea a lot.

Ferid has no hope for the children he drinks blood from (i.e Mika). The children who are in his library are what he views as the “new generation” those who will have dominion over the land. They are “privileged” in his eyes, meaning that he won’t bother drinking their blood. Blood loss can cause accidental death or dizziness. No, Ferid needs these children to be smart and always on their toes. In his mind, because these are going to be the new rulers of the land, they are untouchable. He has to bother to drink their blood, they are the most important to him so he lets them learn. They are on a much higher level than the children he drinks blood from. He doesn’t see them as food, he sees them as future rulers. He respects them in a way because they are eager to learn, which is his plan for them so unlike the children he drinks from (i.e Mika again), whom he sees as nothing but food, and disposable, the kids in the library are on a whole different level.

I feel like Ferid is the High Elf of OnS….this is really weird I know…He’d probably be like a Sindar or Noldor. Teleri…

Anyway, I hope this makes sense. I may not be that into OnS anymore, but Ferid is my favorite character. And I never get bored talking about him.

Blackmail

Mastermind tucked his legs up beneath him, his Dynamo drawing the blanket more securely over him. He shivered, unable to concentrate on the database pulled up in front of him.

“I really hate Psyk,” he muttered as he mentally commanded his Dynamo to bring him hot coffee. Well, maybe he didn’t hate Psyker. But why, why, why did he have to test out Doomsday so close to the heating system?

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SNK Readthrough: Volume 14 Part 20

So this guy walks into a bar….

It’s tempting to make fun of Kenny’s posture and the silly little bartender who squeaks throughout the whole chapter.  It would be funny in the situation wasn’t so dreadful.

Kenny the Ripper is real. Levi lived with him for a time as a child. He was Kenny’s pride and joy, an excellent student. Levi remembers the lessons he was taught. They influence him even now.

What lessons did Levi learn? How to stalk people, how to target them, how to stay concealed. Never get cornered. What else?

It’s hard not to think back to the courtroom scene. How skillfully Levi beat Eren. His words to court take on new meaning, “This is just my personal opinion – but I’ve always found pain the most effective punishment.”

Whatever their relationship was, it’s changed. Kenny is trying to kill him. This is no cat and mouse game. An armed gang surrounds him.

Kenny is verbally abusive as well, making fun of Levi’s height and telling him he stinks. He calls Levi a filthy rat.

I suppose if you wanted to hurt Levi, those would be exactly the things you’d say. We know he’s a clean freak and sensitive about his height.

Despite the insults, Levi doesn’t react. He maintain his calm composure and takes Kenny by surprise with his escape.

I’m very intrigued by Kenny’s accent. The Kondansha version consistently uses “ya” instead of “you”. It makes me wonder where he is from originally.

My 20 Favorite Sterek Fics

so, I read a shit ton of fanfiction and my friend Holly has been asking for recs for the past few months, so here you go

~~~

Alpha Spikes by starbeast: 68,887 words, Explicit.

AU. Alphas are like royalty and are offered their choice of any age eighteen-and-up virgin Omega for each year’s heat season, as a ‘thank-you’ to all they’ve done for their compounds throughout the year. Derek is an Alpha and…yeah, Stiles. Stiles is an Omega. And still a virgin. In every way. And he’s just turned eighteen. This…is not his day.

Every Step You Take by Nokomis, 49,347 words, Explicit

Stiles accidentally ends up magically bound to Derek. It’s super.

Integral to Survival by asocialfauxpas, 8,529 words, Mature

Derek is in the cell for about ten minutes before the lone door opens and a new body is tossed in. The person hits the floor with a grunt, rolls, and stands as the door is clanging shut.

“That’s really not the way to treat a guest!”

Hold the Door by Hatteress, 16,700 words, Teen, **SUPERWOLF

When Derek is killed by a rival alpha, the pack will stop at nothing to get him back. Even if that means blackmailing the most dangerous hunter duo this side of hell. Whatever. That whole devil thing was probably totally exaggerated, anyway.

'linski’s Late Night Antidote to Lame by WhoNatural, 13,865 words, Teen

Where Stiles has his own college radio show, and the mysterious, faceless Derek is his number one fan.

Also there’s this really hot guy he keeps meeting in the library who totally hates his guts.

There is a Brotherhood by minusoneday, 21,004 words, Explicit

So far, college has taught Stiles three things:

1) Eight am classes are cruel and unusual and should be avoided at all costs, even if it means having to enroll in something truly hideous instead, like Econ 101.

2) Dorm security is just as tight as Stiles’ orientation leader had promised it would be, and the dude guarding Scott’s dorm in particular does not respond well to bribes.

3) Mrs. McCall clearly had no clue what she was talking about when she’d insisted that Scott and Stiles needed to branch out and room with strangers, so it’s all her fault that Scott ended up with a total dick of a roommate and Stiles got stuck all the way across campus with some guy who has a girlfriend two towns over and is thus never around.

Stilinski’s Home for Wayward Wolves by owlpostagain, 35,197 words, Teen

“At least your puppies knock first,” Stiles snorts. “Here I thought their alpha raised them to be well-mannered.” 



“There’s a sign,” Derek responds stiffly. 



Stiles, whose curiosity outweighs even his hardest of grudges, abandons his chilly façade of nonchalance in a heartbeat. He jumps right up and all but pushes Derek out of the way in his effort to get to the window, and sure enough when he leans outside there’s a laminated strip of cardstock duct taped to the vinyl siding: 



DON’T FORGET TO KNOCK Stiles gets cranky when we scare him

Or, in which Stiles Stilinski moves to Beacon Hills for his junior year of high school and accidentally adopts a pack of teenage werewolves.

Fireman Derek’s Crazy Pie [Cheeseburger Baby] by owlpostagain, 17,698 words, Teen

“He can’t blame me for the fact that I live in a building full of people united in the singular effort to ogle Hot Fireman as often as humanly possible.“

Laura laughs, loud and echoing in the empty restaurant.

"Hot firemen can make a girl do crazy things,” she agrees, nodding towards her brother’s name on the menu. “Derek won’t let me date anyone from his company, but that doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the eye candy.”

“Send them my way,” Stiles suggests, finally loading up a forkful of pie. “Apparently I’m incompetent enough that I need to be babysat at all times, because it would be cheaper than dispatching a truck every time I try to use a kitchen appliance.”

Crash Landers by gyzym, 31,173 words, Teen

In which Stiles learns to Stalk That Stalk. (Or, how to accidentally woo your unfriendly neighborhood alpha in roughly five hundred handwritten steps.)

No Homo by RemainNameless, 84064 words, Explicit

Stiles’ sophomore year starts something like this:
3 FourLokos
+ 1 peer-pressuring cat
- 1 best bro to end all best bros
= 1 Craigslist ad headline that reads “str8 dude - m4m - strictly platonic”.
Derek is the fool who replies.

By Any Other Name by entanglednow, 33,090 words, Explicit

He doesn’t know his name, he doesn’t know who he is, and neither does the werewolf he’s on the run with. But he’s pretty sure they hunt monsters, because they seem to be really good at it.

Gravity’s Got Nothing On You by zosofi, 83,980 words, Explicit, **Fake Boyfriends Trope

“Three weeks,” Derek says.

“Still don’t want to,” Stiles says.

“I’ll pay you,” Derek says, and that… that has Stiles interested. Alf’s Antique’s may be a great job, but it’s not a high-paying job, and half of Stiles’s tuition is coming from financial aid, so…

“How much,” Stiles asks, “are we talking here? Because I know your family, dude. And it’ll be kind of awkward after.“

“My family thinks you’re some sort of fucking gift to the world,” Derek seethes, like he’s jealous, “they’ll probably be pissed at me when we break it off, so don’t worry about that. Five hundred bucks.”

“A thousand,” Stiles says, because screw ethics. Also, the Hale family is loaded. Derek can deal.

where others fade away by princ3ssp34ch, 9,054 words, Teen, **soulmates trope

When the name Grzegorz tattoos itself across Derek’s wrist in neat, thin strokes, his mother pats him on the head in sympathy and Laura laughs so hard she has to go to her room, the sound echoing down the hall as she goes. When it stays there for six years and no such Grzegorz appears, Derek seriously considers moving to Poland.

Meanwhile, on Stiles’ eighteenth birthday when Derek crawls onto his skin, untidy and volatile, Lydia shrieks in sudden realization, and Jackson looks so entirely offended that even Danny can’t kiss him back to normal.

with bloody feet across the hallowed ground by owlpostagain, 29,900 words, Teen

There were no last words. No more pleas, no more screaming. Just the sound of Stiles squeezing the trigger, the explosion of a second shot rocketing out of the revolver, and the hunters bursting through the open doorway just in time to see the bullet slam squarely into the center of Derek’s chest.

Shutterbug by Yiichi, 53413 words, Explicit

Derek Hale is the photographer for the family-run magazine 'NECKZ 'n THROATS’, a periodical aimed solely at the werewolf demographic. When the model for their monthly bails out, the staff are hard-pressed to find someone else to photograph at the last minute.

Stiles Stilinski is a college student, scraping by on odd jobs to pay for his education fees. When his long-time friend Lydia finds him a one-off gig at a photo-shoot, he figures it couldn’t hurt.

As contrary as their natures appear to be, Derek finds the most fascinating piece of art at the end of his lens.

Versus by secondstar, 94,521 words, Explicit

At age nineteen, Stiles Stilinski was the next big thing, according to The Guardian. It was surreal, not being able to turn on Sky Sports without hearing his name mentioned along with the names of players he grew up idolizing. Stiles couldn’t believe that this was his life.

Jump Then Fall by linksofmemories, 68887 words, Explicit, **not completed yet

“Um, my name is Stiles. Are you Derek Hale?”

“Yes,” and now he just sounded ticked off. “Why are you calling?”

“I, uh, saw your website,” Stiles said, gesturing toward the laptop even though he didn’t know why. “You know, about the sex thing. And you’re a Dom and stuff… and I would like you to dominate me, please.”

The Love You Save (May Be Your Own) by Nokomis, 17,575 words, Teen

Everyone falls magically in love with Stiles. Well, except for Derek, who is suspiciously immune.

Stiles, why is Derek Hale passed out on our front porch? by marguerite_26 and mothlights, 4462 words, Explicit

Stiles doesn’t hear the knock on his front door, but he figures there must have been one, because now his dad’s calling out to him,

“Stiles, do you know why Derek Hale just passed out on our front porch?”

Stiles freezes, carton of milk half way to his mouth. He looks around the empty room, wondering if it has any answers. Derek Hale just passed out on his front porch – sounds like one of the signs of the coming apocalypse.

Wayward and Down by affectingly, 32,431 words, Explicit

Pack is family. Family is everything.

This is Stiles’ senior year, and it’s nothing he could have imagined.

or

That time it took not one, but two separate troll attacks and a malevolent coven of witches for Stiles to figure out how he felt about Derek.

a quick note for Holly: I know you asked for stories with mostly plot, but I admit to putting in several with a more explicit focus. Steer clear of Jump Then Fall, No Homo, Shutterbug and maybe Versus if you don’t want slightly more porn than plot

How I Would Have Done How I Met Your Mother

…seasons 8 and 9 (semi-complete-redo). *this is bound to be long and probably no one cares but I need to write this down for my sanity.

Where we left off:

S7E24: Ted realizes that he has a history of bad relationships with every girl he has dated except for Victoria, and makes it a plan to contact her. Ted is conflicted when Victoria meets up with him on her wedding day and asks him to runaway with her. Lily and Marshall have Robin take pictures of the baby’s first day. Meanwhile, Barney and Quinn are arrested by airport security while on the way to Hawaii when Barney refuses to open a box they are travelling with. On Barney’s future wedding day, his bride is finally revealed, it is Robin. Ted tells Victoria to not blow her happiness on cold feet (her husband is a sensible sexy German and not a ridiculous cliché with an accent so fake it’s pathetic) and takes the train back to NY from Farhampton. There, he meets a girl who apparently has his old yellow umbrella.

And then…

S8E1: To calm an anxious Robin on her wedding day to Barney (in a flash forward), Ted recounts the story of how he persuaded Victoria to work through her nerves and cold feet by realizing why she wanted to marry her husband in the first place, revisiting important moments of Robin’s and Barney’s relationship. Meanwhile in the past (series’ present day), Barney attempts to hide the fact that he and Robin used to date from Quinn, but Quinn learns the truth when sleep-deprived Marshall and Lily accidentally blurt it out. Ted calls the girl he met the day of Victoria’s wedding and asks her out. She politely declines.

S8E2: Barney prepares a comprehensive pre-nup, causing the other guys to think about relationship amendments for their significant others. Tension sparks among the couples when Quinn sets up her own pre-nup proposal. Ted meets up with Victoria who thanks him for setting her on the right path and finally says goodbye, assuring him that the right woman for him is right around the corner.

S8E3: Lily and Marshall have trouble finding a nanny when Barney comes up with an elaborate scheme to meet girls after he and Quinn fell out. Meanwhile, Robin and her former therapist Nick remain to go steady and Ted feels left out. He tags along as wingman for Barney and meets Tracy, the girl with the yellow umbrella again. 

S8E4: When Lily and Marshall can’t decide on who to appoint as godparents for baby Marvin, they put the gang to the test to see who would be the best choice. Ted appoints a third party judge; Tracy. We learn that she is in a relationship.

S8E5: As the season of break-ups continues, Tracy shows up at Lily’s doorstep to get her opinion on her boyfriend’s proposal. We learn that her first fiancé died tragically and that she is afraid to move on. Meanwhile, Barney uses a dog as his wingman which worries Robin. 

S8E6: Barney helps Robin break up with Nick, when she is hesitant to do so herself. Meanwhile, Lily and Marshall desperately look for some time alone. They appoint Tracy and Ted as babysitters while they take the night off. Tracy is a natural with Marvin and Ted learns about Tracy’s old roomate - his ex Cindy - and also about her very recent engagement.

S8E7: Marshall recommends his old law school classmate Brad for a job at his firm, but the interview goes awry, leaving Marshall to do damage control with his boss. Meanwhile, Robin helps negotiate Barney’s return to the strip club circuit. Ted unwittingly enlists himself as Tracy’s wedding planner.

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