he's not a magician

on seduction

*background: our bard has been trying to roll to seduce every npc we meet. DM won’t let her anymore*
DM: you enter the castle, and you find the evil dark magician at last….he asks you to help him defeat all the benevolent gods.
Me: I SEDUCE HIM BEFORE ENNA (bard) CAN
DM: *utterly defeated* just…just roll for it…
Me: *ROLLS A NAT 20 AND HAS A +2 CHARISMA*
DM: he can’t keep his eyes off you. okay. so do you want to help him?
*we all decide not to*
DM: he is angered. he begins to twist and morph…into the DEMAGORGON
Me: I SEDUCED THE DEMAGORGON!?!

anonymous asked:

If the Hardboiled Heavies had voices, what do you think they'd sound like?

Gunner: Perhaps it wouldn’t completely suit his nervous disposition, but I like to imagine him sounding like a stereotypical British bobby-type, what with the batons his Egg Robo crewmembers have. “You’re nicked, hedgehog.”

Shinobi: He’s the hardest one to pinpoint since I think he would be the least talkative of the Heavies. But if he did speak, maybe his voice would be cool and calm, yet cocky.

Magician: Very extravagant and colorful. And she would speak entirely in rhymes, ala Gruntilda.

Rider: Probably very hyperactive and perhaps cutesy. Seeing how I reckon she’s the least overtly malicious of the Heavies, she would have an innocent vibe to her voice too.

King: Sean Connery.

Literally just Sean Connery.

‘It’s time for your digital examination, Poppet.’

Senpai Seven, dedicated to @11daysofhell

SOME ICONIC JIN MOMENTS:

When he started a broadcast just to show his face

Originally posted by penguin-neckpillow

When he battled to death for a bag of chips

Originally posted by whatchumeanjimin

When the members left him hanging but he got himself

Originally posted by jjilljj

When he kept pulling out hearts out of nowhere like a magician

Originally posted by yoongiski

When he made the world faint whenever he blew his kisses

Originally posted by two-different-realms

When he committed cannibalism

Originally posted by bwipsul

When he spells English words to show his genius

Originally posted by jongtaekwoon

When he mastered bird language

Originally posted by jinmini

When he danced with no music …

Originally posted by j-cypher-moved

Everywhere and with everyone

Originally posted by omojinyounghobi

When he got embarrassed by his own doing

Originally posted by existaential

When the future generation of handsome little Jins was in danger

Originally posted by ciutae

When he literally stole the french fries from a stranger

Originally posted by softykook

So whether you think this is embarrassing or cringy this man will never stop, why?

Originally posted by jjilljj

Because your opinion does not count peasant

Originally posted by missbaptan

I love him and you?
By @mimibtsghost

things griffin looked like while wearing a top hat in the mbmbam tv show
  • a rotisserie shithead
  • Jamiroquai’s dad
  • a new character in Candyland that only steals Twizzlers
  • a vaudeville usher who’s trying for a management position
  • if hepatitis was a person
  • a big asshole
  • the ringleader of a pornography circus
  • the hype man for a (failed) 90s hip hop group that had a lot of conflicting stylistic opinions
  • the St. Peter that meets fashion trends in hell
  • a magician who doesn’t realize why he can’t get children’s party jobs
  • a homeless LED sign salesman
  • a pizza sign dancer from a dystopian future where we have LED signs but not any clothes
  • a character from a Dr. Seuss novel that he decided to discard
  • a worker at a shitty steampunk Gadzooks
  • an undertaker for clowns
  • a magical high tech pervert
  • like he tripped and fell into a Spencer’s Gifts
  • like a carpet fucked a nerd
5

something vaguely moboween

dunno if this is gonna grow into something else but pls just have this for now

So, incidentally, my experience with the movie Megamind is that I ended up watching it backwards in a hotel once when I was younger and nothing else was on. And by “backwards” I mean, the first day I only caught the latter half of it and then it was on again the day after and I saw the first half.

That said, that one dang scene, is kind of an immortal one in my mind, because it’s one that has a lot more depth than it seems to.

The part that people often miss is that right after that pithy one-liner of how the difference between a villain and a supervillain is presentation… that whole conversation gets context.

Because Titan makes an immediate lunge for Megamind.

And immediately gets crunched by the giant head, and stuck in that situation because Megamind just drops out of the bottom, to a waiting vehicle, and maneuvers around him to focus on the actual issue: rescuing the hostage while Titan’s occupied.

That whole setup isn’t just, “watch me out-drama you”, it’s showing off an actual tactical asset.

Because Megamind as a character is someone who was always, always motivated by getting attention. The reason why Roxanne is never afraid of being his hostage isn’t because of her unshakable faith in a rescuing hero as much as it is that she knows, ultimately, what Megamind is doing is overwhelmingly a show. His atrocities are symbolic in nature. When he actually needs to take somebody out he dehydrates them into a cube for a while. And it’s not just Roxanne that calls him on this, either- Metro Man’s entire retirement scheme hinged on the idea that Megamind really didn’t need someone keeping him at bay from innocent civilians, because, as we’ve seen, innocent civilians really don’t have much to fear from him. Ultimately he is still, actually, just a kind of needy person desperately looking for validation and approval, neither of which can be provided by dead people.

But that’s not to say he can’t actually fight. Like any actual proper magician, he knows how to hold attention and an element of danger is how that works. He’s actually brilliant, and plenty capable of raising genuine hell.

However- he’s been doing this stageshow thing for ages. He’s mastered this. Titan may have him outgunned practically in every respect- but the guy has no conceivable head for subtlety.

So the real kicker to that whole setup, is this isn’t just Megamind being Megamind for the sake of drama- this is Megamind knowing exactly how easy Titan is to bait, dangling the largest trap he could possibly conceive in front of the guy, and doing it in an unapologetically glorious manner as any true performer would.

“Presentation” is not a superpower to be overlooked.