he's ketchup


and those are the times chris wishes he can cook too…


Grantaire heard on a life hack website that putting your paint in the fridge makes it last longer

Thing is he likes mixing his own colors and sometimes makes big bottles of the specific shades he needs because he knows he’ll definitely use them later with future projects

So it’s no surprise to anyone when he ends up in the hospital when he accidentally put paint on his hot dog instead of ketchup because he thought using an empty bulk sized Heinz bottle was a good place to store his “Burnt Rose Sunrise” paint mix

threecheersforsweetvagina  asked:

I work in food service. I was eating at "shike shick". The guy on the table next to me waived a ketchup cup at a worker cleaning tables and said "I need ketchup". He looked confused because it's not a sit down resterant and said "um the ketchup is over there sir" and pointed at it. The guy said "but I asked you to do it! That's extremely rude!" I looked at the ass hole and said "unless you're gonna tip him at the end of your meal, leave him alone" and I could see him thank me with his eyes.

juichi-bey  asked:

IMAGINE JACK INVITING GABRIEL OVER FOR DINNER AND GABE IS REALLY EXCITED AND NERVOUS CUZ HOLY SHIT THIS IS A DATE AND HE GETS TO HIS HOME And Gabriel is dead. He's dead. This chicken was seasoned with only salt. He's dead. He asked for something spicy and he got handed over ketchup. He's dead. He asked for some condiments and they handed him salt. He's dead. He's not even sure he can look at Jack in the eyes anymore. This is the birth of reaper.

name me a more iconic moment in leafs history than when matt martin told mitch marner to get his own ketchup because he was bitter mitch watched sully without him

anonymous asked:

(if you're still doing the adventure time/steven universe requests) Would you draw Fern getting super angery at a plate of meat loaf? Like he attacks it with his sword and cuts it into the shape of his face?? (maybe make it like a comic and Jake or someone hears some ruckus going on and the first thing he sees is ketchup and he thinks it's blood and then he sees it's just Fern doing some angermanagement on a meatloaf)

I had too much fun with the expressions for this

BF!Yixing Headcanons

Originally posted by ingchya

okay okay cc look i somehow made it turn into boyfriend headcanons and now im in a ball cruin :,(( he’d be such a good boyfriend omf i love this concept im sorry if this isnt what you wanted

  • wakes up earlier than you to watch you sleep !!
  • Not in the creepy way tho oh no
  • He just smiles as you do you,,, and if you snore he laughs a little
  • When it’s time for you to wake up he’ll move his head side to side as you come to
  • Woah imagine that,,, QQ
  • Helps you make breakfast !! or makes breakfast by himself so you can rest a little more because you’re his precious sunshine and he’ll give you his everything
  • Feeds you breakfast,, okay not just breakfast,,, he feeds you every meal
  • But it’s really cute like he’ll make some noises and he’ll chop things up to bite size pieces ahh!!
  • “Babe!! Have some eggs with ketchup!!”
  • Sometimes he’ll do your hair, even if it’s really long/ short
  • He’ll also hum whenever y’all cook!!
  • Like if he’s working on a new track, you’ll know because he’ll hum it
  • “Ooh sounds good ‘Xing!”
  • “Awh it was supposed to be a surprise…”
  • A lotto cute chuckles,, like you know how he usually chuckles and his dimples look so deep,,, and yeah,, like that !! but all the time
  • Always smiling with you
  • Like you could accidentally step on his toe and he’d still smile at you (I would not,, im not petty but id step on all of your toes if you stepped on one of mine,,, okay im petty)

Originally posted by soofflay

  • Going on dates with yixing would be so cute omg,,
  • Okay so he’d do all of the ‘gentlemanly things because he was raised rIGHT.
  • Open the car door for you, closing it for you, holding the door for you, if you got cold he has a jacket !!! (if he doesn’t then you get a back hug,,, which is :,)))), he pulls the chairs put for you too, and the rest of the bs
  • He’ll take you to a fancy restaurant, even though the rest of them said you should go to a mcdonalds or smth, he opted to treat you super fancy !!
  • Smiles when he picks you up bc you’re super pretty, but then thinks you might’ve taken it in the wrong way like “Aren’t I always pretty?” and he starts babbling on about how beautiful you are
  • Smiley the whole date
  • Like if there’s a glass door he won’t notice because he’s too busy smiling and looking at you,,,
  • He hits the glass door,,, you both laugh your asses off about it bc HE WALKED INTO A DOOR. it’s funny okay,,,jdkfgh
  • Still feeds you !!
  • “Ooh babe here comes the expensive food!”
  • “Yixing gosh darnit, no food airplanes in public.”
  • He laughs and says fine, but you start to feed him anyway bc he has a fake pout on and awh
  • Buys all your favourite things bc he’s a good man !! 
You know what pisses me off

the new ketchup


we need to rename him and it should be mustard

then we will have a ketchup, and a mustard, and then we have

the hot dog

so it all works out

one time when i was 6 i dreamt that a giant cartoon raccoon in overalls was forcing me to eat old chicken mcnuggets and ketchup, and he was making my mom mow the yard over and over. i woke up crying

Kou: *practicing his singing*

Ayato: Looks like that practice is useless. Even I could sing better than that!

Kou: You’re right. The only thing more useless than my singing lessons are your dad’s condoms.

A silly Soriel prompt:
Influencing each others’ fashion sense. Because Sans usually doesn’t dress up, Toriel feels more comfortable with casually dressing down, and because Toriel it constantly nest and tidy, Sans finds ways to not look like a navy blue nightmare wearing the same shirt and boxers 10 nights in a row.

Picture them on a date. Toriel in mom jeans, an MTT t-shirt, and barefoot with anklets. Sans in an open blue plaid button up, slacks and clean socks and shoes. But Tori’s shirt is still cleanly ironed and smells of lavender detergent, and Sans’s socks are mismatched patterns/colors, and he has a ketchup stain on his undershirt. Because small changes and neither of them do a complete 180 change. They’re just. Positively influencing each other.

Small things.

I imagine. . .

Sans would be the kind of guy to hide and stash everything. And with his shortcuts, you can never tell what he may pull out.

Is he hungry but doesn’t wanna leave the couch? Poof! He pulls ketchup from his slippers and chugs it right there.

Falling asleep at the post? Well hang on there, he just pulled out a pillow from a tree and it’s out-of-the-dyer warm.

Papyrus lost his scarf!?? No worries! Sans’ll just reach into the toilet and pull out a completely dry scarf.

Pap doesn’t trust anything in the house when he loses something.