sometimes i remember that hawkeye is canonically deaf in the comics and the mcu erased his disability. that they ignored his abusive childhood and gave him a family - erasing his attachment issues. in the comics hes this self-destructive goofy disabled depressed guy who drinks coffee by the pot just to stay awake and is always covered head to toe in band-aids. sometimes i remember that the mcu erased everything about clint barton but the bow and arrow. and it ruins my whole day.
pristinepastel said: Hey, i know you like the first mummy, but what about the mummy returns?
I HAVE RETURNED…after like a day.
but what the people want, the people get!
RIGHT SO THE MUMMY RETURNS!
aka the only sequel that is 1000% just as good as the first one. like holy shit.
ten years later and we meet our heroes again. rick and evie are happily married, going on adventures, and evie’s dream of becoming a respected scholar has come true and they’ve made a tiny human!
the only unrealistic part being that they only had one kid, i mean they are still all over each other ten years later and you’re telling me they only had ONE kid.
okay. sure jan.
but boy o’ boy is that one kid awesome!
alex o’connell. this kid is literally:
50% evie super-klutz-genius.
50% rick screams-at-things-that-are-illogical-to-scream-at.
50% uncle jonathan’s sheer dumb luck and wit.
10% i’m really bad at math.
you get the point. HE’S GREAT. also the actor passed on harry potter because, JUST LIKE ME, the mummy 1999 was his favorite movie and he just HAD to be in the sequel. alex is just such a smart-ass little shit. that much like his mother, accidentally brings about the apocalypse by opening something he shouldn’t have:
ARDETH BAY TIME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. he has a much bigger role in this one. GOD BLESS.(because he was supposed to die in the first one, but test audiences loved him as much as we do, so they kept his fine ass around) he still looks prettier than everyone and is still so done with white people once again.
*after almost being killed on he bus* “this was my first bus ride.” *after realizing they’re gonna make him fly again* “why can’t you people ever keep your feet on the ground?”
he’s just such an awesome A+ friend goals, because while he probably needs to go be with other medjai to prepare for battle against anubis’ army (yikes), he stays with the fam to rescue alex. it wasn’t even much of a thought for him really, rick and evie just batted their eyelashes and he was like: *sighs* “these white people are always messing my shit up, but they are my white people.”
jonathan: still beautifully the same as ever. witty, clever, and would do anything for his family.
“be quiet alex! if there’s going to be any hysterics, they’ll come from me!”
“if you see anyone come running out screaming, it’s just me.”
when he boasts about being a good shot and ardeth is internally like “i’m gonna die.” THEN HE SAVES ARDETH. hell yeah.
rick: he’s still screaming at things. BUT IN DAD MODE. he’s the ultimate dad.
“you, lighten up. you, big trouble. you, get in the car.” *sweetly* “honey, what are you doing, these guys don’t use doors.” “knowing my brother-in-law, he probably deserves whatever you’re about to do to him, but this is my house and i have certain rules about snakes and dismemberment.”
evie: still a super-klutz nerd, but with C O N F I D E N C E. little baby librarian is now a honey badger of ASK ME IF I GIVE A FUCK! and also a re-incarnated princess
“no harm ever came from opening a chest.”
rick: “i swear that kid gets more and more like you every day.” evelyn: “you mean more attractive, sweet and devilishly charming?”
we meet izzy, another one of rick’s ex boyfriends, who is a much more reliable mode of transportation than previously mentioned murder buses.
imhotep: still emo. still wants to make out with his gf.
anck su namun/meela: hella good villain. she bomb af and 100% wants to take over the world. amazing. she actually has like a really cool role this time too!!! like so much screen time.
the rock…i mean the scorpion king, he’s another emo villain with goofy cgi rendering and like 4 million terrible made-for-TV spin off movies that you are lying if you haven’t watched at least one of them and felt that utter disappointment. but who cares the rock is pretty. and this was his first acting role and the reason we have him where he is today.
thank you mummy returns for giving the world actor rock johnson #blessed
THE ROMANCE AGAIN:
normal action movie sequel romance: same guy. different girl. repeat of first movie’s romance. hehehehhehehehhEHEHEHEHHEHH.
not here bitch.
rick and evie’s love has only grown stronger. they still bicker like old ladies at bingo night. the still look at each other like they hung the moon. they’re still disgusting jonathan because they CANNOT KEEP THEIR HANDS TO THEMSELVES. one kid my ass. they still support each other and protect each other like crazy. they love each other so much and it’s so healthy and pure and there is some good in this world mr. frodo.
the bottom line here is. what’s the point of watching the mummy 1999 if you aren’t going to watch the mummy returns immediately after?
Alternatively titled: Lance Deserves The World Because He is My Son and I Love Him
Okay, so Shiro’s gone and someone’s gotta fill his big ass shoes. In the toss-up between him, Allura, and Keith, I’m going to be arguing in this post that Lance could be the guy to do it. And, fair warning, this is going to be ridiculously (like, ridiculously) long lmao so here’s the TL;DR right now: I think that a) Lance already shows the character traits of a good leader, and b) there’s a good chance of him becoming one, given his impending character arc.
It also has a chance of not happening, of course, but who cares?? I already started writing this thing, so:
Alright, let’s begin at the beginning, because that’s always a good place to start.
Lance is first introduced to the audience as the classic loud, arrogant, goofy flirt. The perfect comic relief character. He rescues a guy because his “rival” was gonna do it first and he can’t have that, the first thing he does in the giant robot cat is fart, and he hits on a girl who just fell out of a pod in a magic castle. He’s there to make you laugh.
I can’t imagine anyone looking at a character like that and “You know what? This guy could be a leader.” Allura says it herself in episode 1. The black lion is supposed to be the decisive head of Voltron, a person who’s a natural born leader, who’s in control, and,
Basically, calm, collected, and respected. “A natural born leader.” So, definitely not Lance. Case closed.
But, not really. Because Lance actually is calm and collected. He’s just not respected. He has all the leadership traits– the problem is that he’s not treated as someone who could be a leader.
Aries: the prettiest smile and the weirdest laugh, long, gorgeous hair, unintentionally funny, always wanted to go on adventures with me, tall and handsome
Taurus: seemed like a fuckboy, turned out to be the sweetest most caring lil cutie, was ready to do anything and everything for me, first love, would pick me up for late night drives, loved cuddling
Gemini: quirky and cute, definitely a fuckboy, thoughtful, deep thinker and great to have serious conversations about life with, heartbreaker
Cancer: seemed weird at first, was weird but also so caring, sweet, smart and funny, wanted everyone to be happy, GREAT body, very sexy without knowing it, someone i had lots of fun with
Leo: fun to be around, giggly and jokey, breathtakingly beautiful, amazing at singing, loved animals more than anything, good at sports, first girl crush
Virgo: sarcastic, beautiful on the outside but GORGEOUS on the inside, gave actually great advice, philosophical, gamer girl, good party host
Libra: tried to seem harsh and cool but actual sweetheart once i got to know him, always wanted me to read his favourite books, creative and handy, helpful in all situations
Scorpio: looked like someone from a band, an asshole at first but very cute and great listener, was always low-key sad, pushed me away when i wanted to help him, smelled ridiculously good
Sagittarius: (also my sign) seemed goofy, funny and caring at first but turned out to be the biggest fuckboy, helped me realise new things about myself, hot and handsome, great for having a laugh with, loved going to parties with him
Capricorn: always wanted the best for me, the type of person who always checked i got home safe, protective, supportive, kinda serious most of the time but goofy when we were alone
Aquarius: straight to the point, honest, great athlete and singer, best hugger, weird humour, very masculine, the one you’ll never completely get over
Pisces: sweet, emotional, fell in love fast, big music fan, great at school even though he wouldn’t admit it, quite jealous, if he likes you he will always put you first no matter what, the kind of person i wanted to protect at all costs, clingy
Honestly, I don’t care if it sounds needy, I’m just tired of having failed relationships because of high expectations, I want to find another human being that accepts me exactly as I am from my “emotional mess” times to “completely wild nerd” times. A guy that literally doesn’t care if I did nothing today or if I got a weird obsession that would seem boring to other people, because he’s ok with being human. I just don’t wanna hide my true self from anyone anymore, if somebody wanna be with me they gotta accept me as I truly am, as a complete human being that is NOT f**king perfect okay ?
I just really wish for myself to find a guy that’s a best friend, someone I can laugh to tears with, someone I can cry in front of and be vulnerable without feeling ashamed, someone that I can trust and tell my secrets to, someone that understands me and loves me completely as I am and that I understand and love completely as he is, someone that looks at me with love and passion, someone I can be sweet and loving with, goofy and angry, colorful. But never hurt each other intentionally or mock the other. Never. We can tease each other and argue, but communication is key, and we have a special understanding of each other. That kind of relationship, the “I will never leave you ever” kind. The “I prefer to stand with you in a storm than be comfortable at home” kind of love. We advise each other and complement each other… we’re just two imperfect people, who know they are imperfect, but that accept each other as they exactly are and love each other unconditionally, wouldn’t change them for anything. We can be f**ked up but we wont mind, because we know that’s what part of being human is, but we respect the other and never cross our boundaries. We’re a couple who are total best friends in public, but always finds it endearing to hold each other’s hands. We are a couple that trusts each other and feels secure in the relationship. We are a couple that stands up for their partner through thick and thin and really wants to be together, one where we push each other to be the best they can be even if it makes one upset, we know we are worth it, a wise couple who can talk about everything and anything with no judgment, yet can both be like grandpa and grandma and stay in our pajamas, have a lazy day just watching tv shows and snuggling together while eating things the grandma one prepared, a couple who can go out on dates in casual clothes and not care about people’s opinion, who goes out for long walks in nature, who can be comfortably silent and still somehow understand what the other thinks, who can tell each other things they never told anyone else before and keep the secrets, communicates without judging the other and accepts the other’s opinion, a couple who doesn’t mind insecure and blue days and give enough love to make the other feel at home, a strong couple who stands through challenges bravely and laughs at the face of obstacles, a couple who stays up late at night to talk to each other about anything and everything, that loves each other truly, purely, unconditionally, acceptingly.
So I wrote this as a continuous post on hangoverwatch’s post, but I then decided to just rewrite this as my own text so the general public can read it.
Although I enjoy and appreciate the characterization that Jesse Mccree can be a bumbling goof at times (cause I mean, have you seen his outfit?) And how people portray him as a down-to-earth kind of guy that can and will sweep anyone off their feet with his Southern cowboy charm is great all, but I feel like we as a fandom forget that he is an extremely dangerous man.
In canon terms, his bounty is worth a hell of a lot more than Roadhog and Junkrat’s combined. “But Jess, JR and RH’s bounty are in pesos blah blah blah.” Look, I already did my math, and when RH and JR’s bounties are converted to American currency their amount comes up to $1,371,704.48 each (A total of $2,743,408.96 USD combined) Compare that to Jesse’s whopping $60,000,000 USD bounty, their crimes pale in comparison to Jesse’s. Also, I (for those who need a little more convincing) went ahead and converted Jesse’s bounty to pesos and his came up to a total of $1,093,530,000.00! That’s 2x more than JR and RH’S combined and then some. This guy is a more wanted criminal than them, and they’re known for robbing, bombing, and even killing innocent people. And even if their bounties weren’t in pesos, Jesse’s bounty is still 10,000,000 more than theirs combined.
How he got his reputation to be so notorious is up in the air and will most likely be open to our opinion until we get more history between him, Gabriel, Deadlock, and Blackwatch. (Obviously Deadlock is more of a threat than we may perceive due to them [in the process of] hijacking a government train, and Jack’s voiceline in game saying that Gabriel should have ended Deadlock a long time ago. He of all people should bring up red flags when in comes to gangs considering how he views Los Muertos.)
So knowing that Jesse was part of this group at a young age (in my headcanon he was 15 going on 16) is really terrifying. That gives him a brief time period of a year to get him recruited into Deadlock, figure out his role, steal a lot of government items (successfully might I add), hone his skills as a marksman, and all while making a name for himself. Now, a lot of these things are easy to accomplish at an early age(honing skills, filling a role in a community, and making a name for oneself is all based on dedication.) The thing that’s scary is the fact that more than likely Jesse went on these assault missions and lived while doing the other 3 to the point that he was the only one considered to be taken into OW. Again we don’t know if he was threatened to join or he was offered a spot in OW peacefully. On his bio, it’s said that due to his resourcefulness and expert marksmanship Jesse was given a choice to join or not. So obviously, the person who recruited him (more than likely it was Gabriel) knew about Jesse McCree enough to want him on their team. And as posted by hangoverwatch, OW only has eyes and ears for the best.
So let’s look at the facts:
Like from earlier in this post, Jesse McCree is a highly skilled man. Skilled enough to:
Sit on a train moving at the rate of 640 kpm/h (which is equivalent to 397.678 mp/h. Basically hella fast) with no signs of bodily distress.
Able to jump off said moving train with no struggle against wind and gravity while holding himself long enough to break a window.
Slaughter an entire Talon operative team BY HIMSELF without killing civilians with pinpoint accuracy even in the dark.
Knows he’s capable enough to kill Gabriel–a war hero, super soldier, and the Blackwatch figurehead (his voiceline proves that he feels like he’s the one that should kill Gabriel.)
Was able to survive long enough to earn himself a $60,000,000 bounty while still able to somewhat stay in public without being recognized (the event at Hanamura shows that he’s resourceful enough to cover his tracks to where people still don’t know who saved the shop even with his bounty.)
But that’s not it. He’s also the down-to-earth, snarky man that everyone writes/draws him to be
While a lethal killing machine can be quite the gentleman (stated by Ana who recalls him being “quite the charmer.”)
Has a competitive side (The new summer game line: “I don’t like much losing.”)
He’s a cheeky little shithead (ALL of his interactions with Reaper.)
He’s a cowboy fanboy (Upon closer examination, Jesse did not get his full cowboy get up until AFTER he left OW. Hinted by the voiceline between him and Reaper. R:You look ridiculous. J:Looked in a mirror lately?) He only had his hat and belt buckle throughout the Golden years. Serape, boots, and spurs came later.
So to everyone that thinks that Jesse McCree is an idiot let me be the one to say that you have never been more wrong. This man is a conniving, calculating, murderous, son-of-a-bitch with a cowboy/vigilante complex. He wouldn’t hesitate to put a bullet in your head if you stood on the wrong end of justice, and the problem is, is that it’s his code of justice. It’s whatever he deems is good or evil. This guy is seriously not a force to be reckoned with. Although he may not be as book smart as Winston, Mei, and Satya, and even Blizzard stated he can be a bit of an irresponsible adult (not being able to schedule appointments on his own) He can and will outsmart you in a game of wits effortlessly while also make you question your own intelligence. Long story short: Jesse McCree is a goofy, knowledgable, badass that won’t hesitate to kick your butt if you pushed the wrong buttons. So basically don’t get on his bad side and we’re all golden.
I’m sorry guys for posting to many of these.
But can we talk about this photoshoot for a second.
Like my god do they look goooood. Chanwoo bby is glow up central tbh 😍💦
Yunhyeong just being a ball of sunshine 😩☀☀
Bobby’s first kind of sexy photo and them being the goofy bunny he always is 😍
Bin werking the camera 😏😏😏
Dong is just being his sexy ass self 😩❤
Jun rocking that swimsuit 💦💦💦
And Jinhwan being a cute little cinnamon roll 😍❤
And all of the abbs 😍😩❤
sebastian stan is too powerful because he can fit multiple kinds of hot aesthetic. like, ‘bad guy sex god’ and ‘broody tortured soul’ hot aesthetic??? but also ‘boy next door’ and ‘james dean’ aesthetic??? and ‘subby hot who would love letting you have his way with him’ but also ‘flirty dom who’ll pin you against the wall’??? he can pull off goofy cute or attractive domestic husband or hot hipster. just look at his photoshoots, he can be literally every kind of hot and frankly, no one man should have all that power.
Also, cause I’m feeling nostalgic now, here are some Iconic™ asoue movie quotes from Olaf to consider:
- “Mr. Poe, I will raise these children as if they were actually wanted.” - “My dear…” *looks at smudged writing on hand* “…Violet.” - “The little udders are, uh, hard to locate…” - “Puttanesca.” “What did you call me?” - “Children are, uh, strange and foreign to me. I never really was one.” - “Hello. I am going on a perfectly innocent ride through the country with my kids. Whom I love.” - “Beef, yes. Roast beef. It’s the Swedish term for beef that is roasted.” - “I am Stephano. I am an Italian man.” - “Who is this incredibly handsome Count Olaf I keep hearing about?”
*SLAMS FIST ON TABLE* MORE HEADCANONS. srs tho yours have got to be my fav i'm a slut for meme voltron shit.
happy season 2 my dudes!!
pidge swore off nature forever after getting a mosquito bite on a family camping trip
lance: “hunk is objectively perfect in every way” pidge: “false” lance: “explain” pidge: “he eats pineapple on his pizza”
lance, through clenched teeth and with visible effort: “hunk is… objectively perfect…… in……… every…………… way……………………..”
lance is a dedicated stan which is good because sometimes hunk tests his loyalty
real talk, all of them believed in aliens before the whole voltron thing. they’re space nerds who went to space nerd school and i know for a fact that it’s almost impossible to take an astronomy class w/o walking out convinced that They’re Out There
coran: *goofy space uncle with sick mustache* also coran: *lowkey the most likely in the castle of lions to have killed a guy*
when alteans are young their shapeshifting is really hard to control
so: 10 foot tall purple-haired green-skinned toddler allura
shiro’s in a weird mental place where he’s constantly stressed but also so used to things going wrong that when something does he’s like “well I suppose that’s a thing that’s happening”
has anyone else noticed that keith’s knife is like strapped over his butt
[galra soldiers corner the paladins] “alright i’m warning you, if you guys don’t back off right now my man keith here is gonna pull out his ass knife”