he thought it was his fault


I watched him adjust the cufflinks on his tux for what seemed the tenth time as he paced in the small garden area outside of the church.

“Why are you so nervous?” I finally snapped, “Aren’t you two already married?”

“I’m not,” he lied.

“Yes, you are,” I argued. “Do you think she’s going to say ‘no’ and what? Go back to that house you guys just closed on? Get a divorce? Because you guys are already married.

“It’s not the damn wedding,” Yulian bit out. “Today just marks the start of me taking over. I’ve got to grease up a lot of assholes that I don’t care about all night long. All I want to do is go home and fuck my wife.”

Hector snorts, “You’ll grease them because if you mess up, that’s the only thing you’ll get to fuck tonight.”

“God, don’t fucking remind me.”

“Trouble in paradise already, boss?” I tease lightly.

“Em was seasick the entire way here and when we finally got in town, she’s been too tired to do anything. I haven’t gotten laid in almost a week.”

“Poor baby,” Hector croons dramatically.

“Yep, get married and she stops putting out, that’s the way it goes,” Lobito grouses. The sharp sound of a top being taken off a bottle makes all of our heads swivel to where he’s sitting. “What? It’s true.”

“Where’d you get the beer, man?” I ask suddenly thirsty. I figured it wasn’t going to be a dry wedding, but I hadn’t found the bar, though they probably hadn’t set up yet.

“I asked The Shepard and She provided,” Lobito answers with mock piety. “Through her-“

“Shut up, Lobito. Where?”

“The bar in the reception hall. They wouldn’t give me any liquor but I saw Em’s skinny little brother run off with some. The fucking jerks.” He takes a swig, “I brought up a case. Want one?”

“Pass that shit over!” I made to hand the first one to Yulian but he shook his head.

“My Nonna caught me drinking out here one night. She dragged me by the ear all the way to the confessional. She’s buried somewhere in the church’s crypt. Her ghost would rise up against me if I did it again.”

“But the reception hall here is a-okay?”

“My Nonna’s whims do not have to make sense to you. You just obey and pray to god she’s not carrying a spoon.”

“You want one, Hector? Or are you afraid of your spoon wielding grandma, too?”

“Different Grandmother,” Hector says, taking the top off with his teeth. “Mine was Chief of Police in Newcrest, she’s already spinning in her grave. A beer won’t make it worse.”


“You should have told her.”

He looks up sharply at the tone; accusatory words, but strained, as though they had burst forth against the will of the speaker. He had not even realized that Taran had followed him into the room.

It is unlike the boy to be anything but reverential to a fault in his presence, but it is no trouble guessing what manner of passion drives him now. Taran’s face is flushed in anger, but his gaze is pained and troubled, torn in many different directions.

Gwydion winces at the sight. At the sound of his own misgivings spoken aloud by this boy, who once thought he could do no wrong. Any such utterance by a warrior or advisor under his command would bring on a swift reprimand for insubordination. But he cannot bring himself to stern speech now. It is all he can do to look Taran in the face.

In the face. He realizes, with a sudden little chill, that the boy is as tall as he is. He stands, in this cramped chamber in Dinas Rhydnant, silhouetted against a window; slim, but broad-shouldered, straight as an arrow, his head thrown back in challenge. Their eyes meet on a straight, even line.

He waits, stoic, for whatever must be said.

Taran swallows hard. “You used her as bait. You knew it was dangerous, and you didn’t warn her. You didn’t let me warn her. We could have…made her part of the plan, and instead you just let her–” he breaks off, his breath labored.

Gwydion struggles. An insidious whisper in his mind reminds him that it is outrageous to be expected to explain himself to an underling. Better judgment wins; he measures his words carefully. “I did. I said, at the time, that I was not happy. There was nothing else to be done.”

Taran looks away abruptly, out the window, his knuckles white against the sill. A muscle twitches in his jaw.  "I remember.“ It’s a thick, resentful mutter. ” I followed your orders. I watched and waited and stayed at the castle. I did everything I was told and I still-“ He cuts himself off before his voice can betray him completely. "She was almost lost.”


Gwydion stiffens. A wave of grief washes over him, as though it were yesterday; that white-faced messenger bringing news no one wanted.

The rumors are confirmed. The island lies in ruin; only the castle still stands, and it barely. The queen’s body was found, unmarked but lifeless, upon the dais in the great hall.

And the princess?

He had asked it in a tone whose implications no one present could possibly have mistaken.  


A whisper, reluctant. A traitorous elopement. Disappeared. Not seen to leave the island; presumed dead.


Taran is staring at him again with that expression of uncomprehending anguish, the face of one who has discovered that the gods of his childhood are mere men after all. Gwydion has no words, remembering the blind rage at some unknown man; the need to blame, to accuse, to find a reason for his pain. To turn anger into a shield against it.

“You are angry,” he acknowledges, finally, “as am I, that anyone dear to you should come to such peril. Especially if it could have been avoided. And perhaps, in this, I erred. Given more time, perhaps I could have found another way.” He sighs, feeling suddenly weary, and runs a hand across his face, pulling at his own clenched jaw to loosen it. “It is not given to any one of us to know every possible outcome of our decisions. I did what I must. More lives than Eilonwy’s were at stake.”

Before the last words are cool in the air, he regrets them, for Taran recoils. “Is that what it means to be a prince? A leader?” The betrayal is as palpable as bile in his voice. “To be willing to sacrifice one for the sake of all? Any bait will do, if it will trap an enchantress who threatens your crown?”

The words sting like a lash and the Prince fights down the anger they threaten to release, but a thread of it runs through his return. “A leader will sacrifice himself before any other.  As I would have lain down my life, no less than you, for her. Do not think, had we lost her, that I would not suffer as keenly.”

A face burns into his mind’s eye; sea-green eyes and an arch expression crowned in red-gold; he shuts his eyes and turns his back toward the boy. This boy who loves the girl who should have been–

But he never allows himself to think that.

The sound of the sea, a distant mournful rumble, drifts in through the window.

Taran stammers, his voice low and cowed. “My lord, I…I’m sorry.” Gwydion turns back, gazes at him impassively. “I spoke out of my own grief,” the boy continues. “It was insolent of me to question you. Forgive me.”

“Nay,” the Prince murmurs, “It is I who asks your forgiveness.”

The anguished face turns to him, disbelieving.

“You asked if it means this, to be a leader,” Gwydion says. “I tell you: sometimes there is no good way. Sometimes all ways are bleak, and you must choose the one that seems least so.” He takes a step toward the window, stands beside Taran, looking out. “Whatever the outcome, some - perhaps many -who look to you will be unhappy. And you must bear the weight of their unhappiness, as willingly as you accept their praise and admiration when all is right with their world.”

Taran bows his head. “I would not add to your burden.”

“We all add to one another’s burden,” Gwydion answers, “as well as to each other’s joys. And that is why we all bear them - or enjoy them - together. Such is the lot not only of a prince and a leader but an assistant pig-keeper as well, if they mean to stay friends.”

Taran meets his eyes again, a glimmer of humor touching the corners of his gaze. “It hardly sounds fitting, does it?”

Gwydion smiles. “Then say not a prince and a pig-keeper,” he replies, “but one man and another - no more or less.”

The boy blinks, and blinks again, and his face flushes dark. His drooping shoulders straighten and he turns to look out again, obviously both pleased and embarrassed, though in his eyes the Prince can still see sadness - the monument to a buried idol.

Taran clears his throat. “Lord Gwydion,” he says, and hesitates, before continuing, haltingly, “Do you think a princess would ever marry a…well, someone who isn’t a prince? Or even nobly-born at all?” He glances at him anxiously.

Gwydion forces his face into a smile he does not feel, and hopes his voice holds no trace of revelatory bitterness.

“I am told,” he admits, “that it is not without precedent in certain families.”


benjaminrussell replied to your post “If I were to ask for drabble prompts that I could work on during…”

Hardison riding behind Eliot on a motorbike and marvelling about how strong and muscley Eliot is. He thinks he’s being subtle but Eliot’s totally on to him. Make outs ensue. (Parker’s also on board with the idea)

@benjaminrussell Thank you for the prompt! I had fun with it, and I hope you like it!

(crossposted to ao3 here)

So. This was completely Eliot’s fault.

Why he’d even wanted the damn bike in the first place was beyond him. Of course, he’d told Hardison and Parker why but it had boiled down to the same reasons he was still fixing up the car Nate thought was his (but didn’t have the guts to actually, you know, try and convince Eliot of that. Good luck with that Nate).

Hardison hadn’t really followed beyond the general “Dammit Hardison, I don’t say anything when you geek over your little toys-” which was a bald-faced lie, but whatever. And Parker had lost interest when Eliot had insisted on paying for the title from their clients at the end of the job.

So, here they were, Eliot handling the beat up old softail Harley as naturally as he did anything else out of left-field. (Because of course he was.) Parker was behind them, handling Lucille a lot less delicately, and damn near giving him a heart attack every time he looked back.

Which. Yeah. Looking back.

He was perched on the bike behind Eliot. Why? Good question.

Keep reading

Billie’s Return (an imagine)

So yeah here’s what I see happening…

Billie appears around the corner, completely shocking the Winchesters.

“ ‘Sup, Dean,” Billie says, crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow.

Dean is too shocked to respond, his eyes wide. He freezes as he was reaching for the book on the table in front of him.

“Billie?” manages Sam, although his voice is just above a whisper.

“Never thought I’d run into the Winchesters again. ‘Specially after what happened the last time I saw you.”

Dean manages to find his voice “Yeah, sorry about that,”

Billie uncrosses her arms and takes a step toward the boys. Dean flinches slightly, but only Sam notices. He says nothing, wondering where this is headed.

She shrugs. “Not really your fault, was it? But Cas…” She swings her arm out, looking around the room. “Cas isn’t here anymore, is he?”  she crosses her arms again and waits for the reaction.

Dean swallows and is about to speak but Sam interrupts quickly.

“No, he’s not. Lucifer -”

“Yes I know. I saw. We met up in The Empty.” Again, she waits for the reaction. Specifically Dean’s reaction, as her eyes never leave his.

“You’ve seen Cas?” gasps Sam.

“Seen him? Hell, I brought him home.”

The silence is deafening.

Squee’s Supporters

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Drabble tags: @whereisyour-moose

I also wanna tag @ibelieveinthelittletreetopper just for this one cause I’m curious as to what you think of my idea?? :)

Homecoming C. G

You wondered if Corey thought about you now and then, how happy you too were together, you were the happiest you’d been in a long time.

You wondered if he wanted to start over again, maybe he’d realized the mistakes he’d made in the past, he never made time for you, he always blew you off for something, or someone else. It wasn’t all his fault though, you knew who he was before you had met him, you had heard stories of how he was a jackass; a total player, yet it didn’t stop you from loving him.

You would see him backstage before he worked his commentary position on Monday Night Raw, and you’d swear, just for a second, he’d stare at you when you weren’t looking, like he had something he wanted to say, then he’d turn his head back to the pretty, black haired girl who was talking his ears off the whole time, he’d respond to her nonchalantly, you missed hearing his voice.

you two hadn’t talked in weeks.

Maybe he thought about you just as much as you thought of him, maybe he did want to start over again, maybe, just maybe, he missed your touch just as much, then you saw him kiss her. Your heart dropped in your chest and you realized, he had really truly forgotten about you.

*I’m sorry if this feels kind of short, I tried to fit in what I thought went best with the oneshot 💜💜

Do you know what pisses me off the most about the dreaded “Autism Moms”?

Let me tell you, as an autistic adult who also was a main caregiver for an autistic boy (my brother). 

For the record:  I swear that if you use this post to say autism makes people violent and abusive, I will send 12,000 angry geese to flock in your bedroom and destroy every item that you treasure the most. AND I will eat the leftovers you had planned on eating for lunch tomorrow. Don’t you fuckin dare miss the point of this post. 

Listen up. I got a story for you.

Bit of background first.

My boy, my little hobbit, was born when I was ten years old. My mother left him alone with my grandparents and me. She legit abandoned him. 

My grandparents weren’t sure they could take him in. 
I begged. I pleaded. I asked as hard as I could to let us keep him and not give him back to my mother. 

Of course, they said yes. 

I dutifully became the protective older sister.

I would bathe him up until the week I left for college. I measured his medications and crushed them into his favorite yogurt. Blue, if you were curious.I made sure his food was perfect - french fries made just like he wanted, a chicken fry sandwich complete with his favorite McDonald’s sauce we bought in bulk.  
I went to his speech and occupational therapies several times a week, and practiced the things he learned. I went with him to his first day of school.

I even did a middle school project all about autism (which I am slightly embarrassed about, as I mentioned A$ in it ugh). I read all the autism books a 12 year old could find, and immersed myself in the Vanderbilt paperwork. I delved into the world of IEPs, visual schedules, and basic sign language.

And now, I’m still sending them resources and information on medications, papers for teachers, and going over doctor notes for him - despite being six hours away. 

(Of course, I was an undiagnosed autistic girl who also needed quiet. When I wasn’t needed to do these things, I was often in my room away from the loud television and people. I wasn’t a perfect caregiver, but I did do a lot.)

All of that to say: yeah, it wasn’t easy. But since when is raising a kid ever easy? I started looking after this boy when I was ten years old.

But here’s what infuriates me.

I read all the time about these autism moms who complain about how terrible their lives are. They say they’re afraid of being hurt and their lives are destroyed. Some even talk about killing their kids.

You know what?

Yeah, I got hurt by him or when helping him. I got bit, scratched, hit, and everything else. Usually it was just him being frustrated over lack of communicating his needs, so I was rarely angry. 
I ran after him when he went out the door straight for a lawnmower and I fell to the concrete. I grabbed him right before he ran into a street and ended up with my arm covered in blood.

I was kicked in the head and given a traumatic brain injury that requires me to now use a cane, and has caused a ton of nervous system issues. I even use a wheelchair part-time due to another condition that occurred afterwards. I’m only 20, and my health is pretty comparable to someone with congestive heart failure.

And you know what? 

I never in a million years thought about hurting my little brother.

I still don’t blame him. He was often overwhelmed, and had meltdowns. As an autistic person myself, I understood it - even if I didn’t know I was autistic at the time. (I suspected, but was too focused on other things.) 
I don’t know if I’ll ever get better health-wise, and that’s okay. I don’t know if I’ll get to run and dance again, or if there’s worse effects to come. It’s just what it is, and I’ve accepted that. 

He’s a child. It’s not his fault. He once asked me if it was, and I hugged him tight and said absolutely not. 

I say all this not to demonstrate how violent autistic people can be, but to demonstrate that I get where these autism moms are coming from.

  Again, for the record, autistic people are far more likely to be abused and assaulted. 

Remember how I said  I get where they’re coming from?

Yeah, that’s still not an excuse to be harmful toward your child. Ever.

You don’t give your babies bleach, shock them, or starve them. You don’t talk about them as if they’re literally a death sentence for you. And you sure as hell don’t want to murder your little ones. 

And if you literally want to kill your kid, if you would rather have a dead child than an autistic one, I have news for you.

You don’t deserve that child, and you better back up and understand this.

You autism moms need to stop. You need to listen. 

Your kids are going through a world that wants to “cure” them, force them into suffering so they can look “normal.” Your kids are going to spend their entire lives dealing with a world that is hostile to them. People try to assimilate us to save their own pride, at the expense of our own comfort and stability. 
Your kid is going to go through life being told that they should be literally “treated” with electroshock therapy because of their neurology. They’re going to be told that they shouldn’t reproduce. They’re going to be told that they’re not worth having space in this world. Your kid is going to grow up one day, and they’re going to hear this and internalize it. 

I know that, because that’s what I hear every day. 

You say it’s so hard to have an autistic kid?

Well, of course it is. But you know what?

Kids are hard.
They’re going to kick, hit, pinch, and everything else. Even neurotypical kids do that. I don’t know a single kid who hasn’t bit their caregiver or thrown something when grumpy. 
(I’ll say it again for those in the back: autistic kids are way way way more likely to be abused and hurt.)

When you have a kid, you sign up for this. You love that little one unconditionally, you protect them with all your heart. You give them support. You love that child even if they have a disability, especially when they have a disability.

You teach them that they are allowed to exist, that they are just as valuable and needed in this world like anyone else. We need all the neurodiversity in this world we can get. 

You teach your child that they’re not a burden. You teach them how to say no and that autonomy is often more important than compliance. You teach them that you love them, and that they will always have someone in their corner to back them up when times are tough.

I don’t care how hard you think it is raise an autistic child.

Trust me, I know full well it’s hard. Parenting is hard. It’s not easy, and it’s not always roses and fluffy kittens. That has nothing to do with having an autistic kid; that’s just a fact of life. 

The fear of getting hurt is valid. I can attest to that, and I don’t think I can downplay that. But that behavior is communication, and you have to learn how to read it. I did. You have to fight for better supports, for ways to make it easier on your kid - and by doing this, easier for you too. 

Sure, it’s hard.

But you know what? Your kid’s going to have it much harder. 


Tucker’s just really glad Wash is okay.

Here’s Galileo’s 7 month semi-stack photo! He’s 29 inches at the shoulder and 63.8lbs. Big boy! 2.5 more inches and he’ll be as tall as Bandit. 

OK no I’m sorry, but you do not “That’s an order!” him!

Like, ok I understand where Shiro might be coming from (Mental issues, brainwashed somehow, I dunno, I know Shiro is not fine) But how dare?? How dare?? Specially when Keith is making really good points! He like just broke Keith’s heart.

Because what does it tells Keith?? 

That all Shiro is telling him about what a great leader Keith can be is bullshit, that Shiro doesn’t really trust him, and that Shiro doesn’t see them as equals. That he still sees him as a trouble making cadet or something.

Shiro keeps telling Keith how he believes in him and yet he doesn’t let him lead, and this has been two episodes for us, but seems like it’s been months for them.

I bet Keith started to train with the BOM just cuz of Shiro’s attitude.

That’s why he looks so sad after they all hug…

He thought he found people who accept him and appreciate him and believe in him, but seems like he was wrong. So he leaves before they can really reject him. 

Shiro just kinda pushed Keith out of the team because he couldn’t handle the fact he wasn’t leader and Pilot of the black lion anymore. (And I understand why Shiro might act like that, but still..)

And Keith is such a precious boy, he still only thinks of Shiro’s well being the entire time..

Like none of this translates to him as “Shiro is being an asshole” he thinks it’s all his own fault, that something is wrong with him. 

Like you mean it 😘

Thank you, @cuppa-tea-eh for that prompt! :) It was so much fun! (and whenever ‘it was fun’ it turns into… well, 3k this time. Whoops!) I also posted it on AO3 if you prefer to read it there… :)

Cho Chang. Cho Chang? Really? Cho. Chang!!

“Draco, are you alright?” Pansy was waving a hand in front of his face, scrutinising him intently. She looked worried.

“Cho Chang,” Draco muttered for the umpteenth time. Pansy sighed, letting her hand drop to her side and leaning away again.

“Yes, Draco, Cho Chang. But she said no. She’s already going with someone else.”

Draco couldn’t help but sneer. Thank Merlin Chang was already going out with Diggory! But Potter seemed to fancy her nonetheless. Draco had caught him staring at the Ravenclaw in the Great Hall several times. It made him want to dump his porridge on Potter’s head.

When he saw Potter the next day, he noticed how tense his shoulders looked, how he was walking with his head bowed. Draco would have liked nothing more than to go over there and end Potter’s misery. There were only a few minor problems. Draco had a reputation to uphold. He couldn’t just walk over there and ask him to the Yule Ball. Besides, Potter didn’t even like him.

The more Draco thought about the impossibility of ever being with the stupid Gryffindor, the angrier he got. As he watched Potter cross the courtyard, he acted on impulse. He scooped up a handful of snow and threw it with as much force as he could. It hit Potter right in the back of his head.

“Ow!” He whirled around and narrowed his eyes when he saw Draco sneering at him.

“Potter!” Draco didn’t even have to force his voice to sound gleeful, it was an automatism. “Could you be any more pathetic?” He approached Potter with a smart pace, flashing his ‘Potter stinks’ badge before he came to a halt in front of him. “How does it feel, Potter, to realise you’re not everybody’s darling?” He cackled scornfully, jutting his chin forward. “The Boy Who Lived… can’t even find a date for the Yule Ball.”

Potter glowered at him and Draco felt almost embarrassed about how much he was enjoying it.

“Oh, because everybody is begging you to go with them?” Potter said in a mocking tone. Draco straightened himself, attempting to look as superior as possible.

“Unlike you, I get to pick and choose amongst my devoted admirers.”

Draco scowled when Potter snorted.

“Right. The one devoted admirer being Pansy Parkinson. And you call me pathetic.”

Draco struggled to keep his composure. But he wouldn’t let Potter win.

“Should I build you a snowwoman, so you won’t end up alone after all? At least she’d have as much charisma as you.”

“Don’t bother, Malfoy,” Potter said gruffly. “Worry about yourself. I bet you can’t find someone other than Pansy who’d want to go with you.”

Draco felt his cheeks burn up. He didn’t want to go with Pansy but had already made his peace with it, seeing as the person he really wanted to go with wasn’t an option.

“I already told you, I have lots of choices,” Draco fumed. It was an outright lie and he suspected Potter knew it. The Gryffindor crossed his arms in front of his chest and gave Draco a speculative glance.

“Alright, let’s make a bet then.”

Draco pressed his lips together to keep himself from gaping. He squared his shoulders and forced himself to smirk.

“Sure. But if- I mean when I turn up with my date, who won’t be Pansy, you’ll kneel in front of me and kiss my hand.” Draco chuckled inwardly.

“What? I won’t be kneeling-”

“Scared you’ll lose, Potter?” Draco said tauntingly. Potter gritted his teeth.

“Fine! Since you seem to be so sure of yourself, I’ll make it easy for you. If I win, you’ll kiss your date in front of everyone! Like you mean it.”

Draco bit his lip. Potter wasn’t playing fair. He knew Pansy had a thing for Draco and she would kill him if he went to the ball with somebody else and kissed them right in front of her. But he couldn’t back down now.

“You’ve got yourself a bet, Potter,” he growled and stalked off to the Slytherin common room. What had he gotten himself into? This was bound to end badly. He knew it from the second he had agreed to this stupid bet and was proven right again when he talked to Pansy.

“What do you mean, you can’t go to the ball with me?” she screeched. Draco sighed.

“I made a bet with Potter,” he said, plopping down in an armchair.

“And that bet excludes me as your date?” She was probably going to start throwing things any second now.

“It does,” Draco replied. “Just ask Blaise or something.” It was obviously the wrong thing to say. Pansy’s face was red and blotchy, her nostrils were flared and her eyes look murderous.

“I will kill Potter for this,” she yelled and stormed off into her dorm. Draco let his head fall back and tried not to think about how Pansy would react if he actually had to kiss someone in front of her. Like you mean it. Potter’s words echoed in his head. That would be a tough sell. The only person he could imagine kissing in earnest was the one he’d had to beat in this stupid bet.

Draco looked around the Great Hall and wrinkled his nose. Finding a date to the Yule Ball had turned out harder than he had anticipated. Every single person he had asked was already taken, or at least they said they were, and time was running out fast. The stupid ball was tomorrow. His only consolation was that Potter didn’t seem to have had much luck either.

He didn’t know why he did it, what idiocy drove him to provoke Potter further, but when Potions class was over, he strode over to the Gryffindor and casually leaned his hip against his desk.

“Time’s almost up, Potter. We can do a test run if you like, to familiarise your knees to being bent.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Granger and Weasley blinking at him.

“I don’t think that will be necessary,” Potter said, standing up. “You on the other hand should probably take better care of these.” Without warning, Potter’s thumb was brushing Draco’s lower lip. “They look a bit chapped. Wouldn’t want your date to cut themselves on your lip.”

Draco could only watch Potter and his friends, who were still gaping at Draco, leave the classroom while he stood there, dumbfounded and rooted to the spot. His heart was about to jump out his chest and his legs felt like he had been hit with the Jelly-Legs-Jinx.

He was still slightly swaying when he found Blaise in the library.

“Got a date yet?” he asked, putting down his quill. Draco groaned.

“No. And Potter is driving me insane!”

“Honestly, you should just ask him to be your date and be done with it,” Blaise suggested.

“You’re very helpful,” Draco barked.

“Seriously, Draco, I swear to Salazar, if you don’t do anything about it and I have to endure you talking about him every waking minute until we finish school, I will throw myself into the Great Lake.”

“You know very well I can’t do anything about it,” Draco huffed. “And I do not talk about him that much.”

Blaise gave him an exasperated look and sighed.

“Why do you even like him?”

Draco frowned.

“How should I know? I just… do.”

Shaking his head, Blaise took his quill and stuffed it into his bag.

Keep reading

Imagine demon!Dean beating a guy up to death because he touched you and he got jealous.

“She’s pretty.” you said softly, trying to hold back the hint of bitterness and pain in your voice. Or jealousy for that matter. You couldn’t blame her, who knew with how many women Dean had been with ever since he became a demon.

“And probably his type. But it shouldn’t bother you now, should it chipmunk?” Crowley raised an eyebrow as the both of you didn’t take your eyes off of the demon playing darts as the blonde waitress gave him another drink with a rather flirtysmile might you say.

“Not now, not ever.” Crowley finally turned to look at you “You are not his girlfriend, (Y/n). Never been, yet you are bothered so much by this. I wonder why.”

You scoffed, turning to glare at him “As if you don’t know. Dean is probably the most oblivious man in the world but you never were Crowley. Why would you use this stupid nickname on me if you didn’t?”

“Guilty.” he flashed you a smile, downing his drink “But he’s no longer the man that you remember, love.”

“Right, so that’s why you wanted me here?” you scoffed “And don’t you dare deny it to me Crowley. You didn’t even blink in surprise when you saw me. You’re letting yourself get caught and sooner or later Sam will come walking in as well.”

“I must admit- the only thing that did surprise me was the fact that moose didn’t come in right after you.” he shrugged “But probably- it’s time to finally put him on track-” he looked at Dean “And make him realize how little he is leaving for just how much.”

“Hell? Oh wow, yes Crowley that really is everyone’s dream kingdom.”

“It is one, nonetheless.” he winked at you and before you could say a thing he had vanished right in front of your eyes. You scoffed at him but didn’t have the chance to question him when you turned your head and your eyes locked with his green ones. And just like always they made your heart skip a beat. Because maybe you were always friends but your love for him was undying.

You held your breath as he set his glass down and raised an eyebrow at you. He said nothing to the rest of them men he was playing with and casually strode towards you “(Y/n)” his voice was as rough but a lot more cold “Fancy seeing you here.” and the smirk on his face made it all worse.

“Is it?” you asked in a low voice and his smile dropped.

“What do you want here?” he asked serious.

“Oh so Crowley didn’t tell you?” you scoffed a laugh “He knew I was on your tracks with Sam, he should be here very soon. I managed to get a lead and thought if I could convince you to come back without him having to hurt himself but… I don’t think there is a point in trying.”

“I told you to stay away.” he shrugged casually, stuffing his hands in his pockets “Not my fault you don’t listen.

“You told Sam to let you go, not me. And I thought there was a chance here but- I was wrong obviously. I’m curious how you didn’t see this coming, or even more that Crowley didn’t speak to you about his plans. Whatever those may be. What happened? Don’t you guys tell everything? Oh no, don’t Dean, secrets are bad, they ruin relationships. We know it better than anyone.” you went from sarcastic to completely serious.

He scoffed, putting on a smirk on his face and rolling his eyes “Don’t care what his game is, I am not his toy. I have my own plans and I’m glad that… he made it easier for me.” he looked

“What do you mean?” you frowned when you noticed the predatory smile on his face “Made it easier by letting me find you?”

“I’ll let you know soon, now follow me and let’s out of here. You’re drawing too much fucking attention with those shorts.” he took hold of your arm, dragging you up as he glared at a few men behind you that had been sneaking looks at you.

“Like hell.” you hissed, snatching your arm from his “Why does it even matter to you? Especially now, I am nothing to you. So what if they look? I am free, Dean, hell they can even touch as much as they want to.” you said angrily.

His eyes darkened as he looked “Let’s go. Now.” he said in a low almost growl but you weren’t having any of it.

“Why?” you scoffed a laugh “So that you can kill me now? Or so that she doesn’t see us talking?” you motioned with your head to the blonde that already had her eyes on you. You tried so hard not to show how much this was hurting you.

“She has nothing to do with this. Come on.” he tugged, holding your hand again.

“Right, of course she doesn’t.” you scoffed “With how many have you been exactly all these months?”

“You’d want to know, wouldn’t you?” a satisfied smirk was on his face.

You didn’t have the chance to speak though because another voice spoke up “Is everything alright?” it was a guy you had seen checking you out ever since you came in.

“Yes, everything’s fine actually. My friend here was just leaving.” you gave Dean a look “How about you buy me a drink and we can talk?” you gave him a smile that made his grin widen.

“Yes, of course sweet cheeks.” he wrapped an arm around your waist.

“You’re gonna lose that hand buddy.” Dean growled, and you both stopped before you could leave.

“Excuse me?” he raised an eyebrow “Did you just threaten me?”

“No, I was giving you a friendly warning.” Dean shrugged with a casual smile.

“Yeah, right.” he scoffed, arm tightening on your waist just to mock the demon and for a second you got scared when Dean’s smile completely fell.

“But you obviously don’t listen very well.” he scoffed and before you could realize it he had grabbed the man by the collarof his shirt and pinned him against a pillar.

“And now- you get to see what I mean when I say that you shouldn’t have done that.” and even if you expected it you jumped when he threw a powerful punch at the man. And the another, and another and another without letting him do a single move. You were almost scared for his life when you saw the mark on Dean’s arm burn that angry red as he kept hitting the guy, blood covering his fist and groans and moans of pain filling the bar along with hushed whispers from other customers.

“Fucking asshole, think you could ever have a piece of that?” he scoffed a laugh, punching more “In your dreams!” another punch “She’s too pure and perfect for a bloody jackass like you. You would never stand a fucking chance.” he growled, punching him more.

You could barely make out any of the things he said after that as the sounds were too much to handle. People shouting, some cheering and encouraging him to keep going. And then you heard her.

“Dean, stop!” she screamed but he didn’t listen to her, as he kept punching with groans himself “Stop! You’re gonna kill him!” she screamed but it didn’t seem to have a single effect on him at the moment.

“Would serve him fucking right.” Dean growled, grabbing his bloody face and making the guy look at you “Do you see that? Do you see her?” he said through gritted teeth “She’s great isn’t she? And you’d really want a piece of her tonight but that would be it. You had some gruesome thoughts for her after that though, didn’t you?” he turned his head to look at Dean “Didn’t you?” he roared and he gave him a weak nod.

“Just like I thought.” Dean smirked “For the first, I’d really just break your hand and maybe face. But for this-” he looked at him darkly and your breath got caught in your throat. If he killed him right there in front of so many people he’d draw all the wrong attention.

“Dean!” you screamed “No, no don’t!” you exclaimed and as surprising as it was for everyone, it caught his attention and he glanced at you over your shoulder. You looked at him with wide eyes, shaking your head in fear.

“Seems like your lucky day, bastard.” he growled “You’re very damn lucky that she can have this effect on me because trust me your death… it would have not been easy. And she would never give you a single glance because you know why?” he smirked in an almost sinister way “Oh you know why.” he laughed, pushing him to the side and he fell on the floor. He looked down at him for a second, smirking before with a roll of his eyes he turned around and looked at the rest of the customers.

He didn’t say a think, he only scoffed at them and walked towards you.

“D” you found yourself whispering as you stared at him with wide eyes “You would have-”

“I should have.” he growled “Hope you fucking understand I am not playing games here, (Y/n).” he grabbed your jaw with one hand and your heart leapt to your throat when he brought his face closer to yours, your lips only an inch away. You knew what he wanted to do but he stopped himself, looking from your lips up to your eyes. He smiled slightly, running his thumb over your lower lip.

“You are mine, and I’ll make sure everybody knows it from now on.” he said in a low rough voice and you frowned. You knew in what way he meant it, you were no fool with what he had almost done but it still confused you. You were always friends and on top of that even if he didn’t care at the moment as a demon… what really held him back from forcing a kiss out of you? IT felt as if for a moment you saw your own Dean flash through his eyes.

“Only. Mine.” he said in a husky voice in your ear and you felt shivers run down your spine when his teeth grazed over it “I’ll wait in the car.” he added and let go of you, almost leaving you to try to recover from the shock.

But you only had another one coming once he’d left and the waitress spoke to you “You are (Y/n)?”

“Why-” your voice was hoarse as you looked at her “You know me?” and the look on her face only said yes, making you realize there was only person that could have spoken about you to her.

Dean. But the real question was why?

The Wake of War


So.” Stiles drops back against the side of the Jeep, elbows braced and spine sinking slow against the dusty blue metal. Derek’s hovering a few feet away, at the edge of the lot, not quite ready to vanish into the night but not prepared to join with the rest of the group, either.

He needs their voices, maybe, to block out the ones in his head.

“Looks like I saved your ass again,” Stiles is saying, flashing him a crooked grin. He looks warm and bright like the rest of them, a glow of victory dancing around him that can’t quite seep into Derek’s bones. “What’s the count, now? ‘Cause I think I’m getting pretty close to earning a victory ride in that sweet new Camaro.”

Derek’s lips twitch, a snort slipping out.

“I seem to recall saving you last time.”

“Hey, we’ve been through this. At best, that was a tie.” Stiles looks so smug Derek can’t bring himself to argue, and maybe that’s the reason Stiles’ grin falls. His eyes go soft, flitting over Derek’s frame.

“I’m glad you’re ok, man. …I mean, as nice as it would have been to have my very own, hot guy lawn ornament––”

“Why did I look at her?”

He doesn’t mean to say it; flinches at his own words. His hands are too-tight fists he stretches straight with an effort, and when he looks at Stiles again the bright expression’s gone, replaced by tension and an edge of a grimace he’s trying to fight down.

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anonymous asked:

Stenbrough, Georgie has a little cute crush on Stan

Oh my GOD I saw this and aaaaaa I couldn’t wait to write these!! I hope you like it because I love you for this request

- okay so this is when they’re 17 and Georgie is around 11 (I think)

- Georgie’s inspiration is Richie so he becomes sassy™

- When Bill first brings Stan home to sleep over after a date Georgie is so awestruck

- Like, wowie look at this boy his brother is holding hands with

- He’s pretty shy around Stan at first, he definitely gets all blushy and forgets how to human if Stan talks to him

- ‘Hey Georgie, how was school today?’ ‘Uuuuuuuuuu yes?’

- He likes to do stuff for Stan and purposely not for Bill

- One time, they made cookies at school so Georgie gave one to Stan and just left Bill out

- Stan gave him half anyway

- He asked Stan if he’ll go to his school dance with him (they had to take someone older to take care of them) and of course Stan agreed

- When he finds out that Stan and his brother are indeed dating he gets really upset

- because how dare Bill, his own brother, Stan is HIS boyfriend

- When Georgie gets used to Stan being around the house he tries to tell Stan that Bill isn’t good enough for him and that he’s wayyy better

- When Stan and Bill walk through the door, he’ll take Stans hand and drag him away

- He’ll tell Stan all of Bill’s flaws in efforts to make Stan change his mind but Stan secretly thinks all of Bill’s ‘flaws’ are adorable

- Georgie also thinks that the most innocent things that’s Bill does that he doesn’t agree with are the worst things ever

- 'Did you know that Bill sleeps with socks on, like WHO does that?!’

- 'Who even drinks orange juice after brushing their teeth?! He’s not boyfriend material at all Stanley’

- He’ll also compliment Stan a lot, mainly about his hair but sometimes about his fashion or personality

- Georgie isn’t too good at flirting yet but Stan appreciates his efforts

- 'Your hair is…very curly, yes’

- Bill is actually smooth™ and Georgie is kinda m a d about that

- Georgie has also accepted their PDA but that doesn’t stop him from trying to take his brother’s boyfriend

- Like Stan and Bill could be watching a horror movie, cuddling on the sofa and Georgie will bring Stan some candy and run away

- 'G-g-Georgie stop t-trying to take my b-b-boyfriend away from m-me’

- 'Sorry Billy but you said Stanley deserves the best and he’s with the wrong Denbrough right now’

- Stan likes to snuggle his face into Bill’s neck when they cuddle and talk

- one day they are discussing Georgie 'little’ crush on Stan

- Stan just laughs into Bills neck and says 'I never thought I’d be in the position where my boyfriends little brother wants to date me’

- 'It’s y-y-your fault for b-b-being so p-p-pretty’

- Bill knows he shouldn’t be but he’s super protective over Stan and that doesn’t change with even his own brother

- he loves Georgie, he really does, but he needs to back the fuck up from his man

- he takes tips from Richie (who would have thought) and leaves marks on Stan neck

- 'Fuck sake Bill, you know my dad is going to be so pissed’

- 'Well e-everyone knows you’re mine n-n-now’

- Georgie is very concerned when he sees the marks, even more so when he finds out Bill put them here

- 'Why are you hurting Stanley? See, I told you he’s a bad boyfriend’

- 'It means he’s mine forever now’

- now Georgie thinks that hickies are basically marriage

- He sees Eddie’s one day

- 'Are you married like Stan, Eddie?’

- 'Who the fuck did you marry because it sure as hell wasn’t me’

- 'Richie calm down, I’m not fucking married’

- Stan is always super sweet to Georgie, he thinks his little crush is adorable and he loves the way Bill is protective over him even when he doesn’t need to be

- 'I’m s-starting to think I’m n-n-not your f-favourite Denbrough , babe’

- 'Ah yes, because I would totally leave you for your ten year old brother, shut up billiam’

- Stan loves both brothers but he loves Bill more, don’t tell Georgie though

Add more because this idea is the cutest thing xo

I’d like to thank the incredibly talented @kelslk for this stunning commission of a scene from Celestial Navigation where Steve and Tony have their first dance.  I love how well the moment is captured by the art.  So much pining!

These are the days of the endless summer
These are the days, the time is now
There is no past, there’s only future
There’s only here, there’s only now

“Shall we?” Steve asked. Tony couldn’t have answered if he’d tried.  Instead, he just nodded and stepped towards where Steve stood.

I’m supposed to show him how to do this, Tony thought, feeling a hysterical laugh try to work its way out of his throat.  One of Steve’s hands slipped around to splay against the small of Tony’s back, heavy and warm where it settled at the base of his spine. The other encircled Tony’s hand and held it up, just below Tony’s eye level.

Oh, Tony thought, breathing out a long rush of air.  Okay.  He could do this.  Oh, God, how was he supposed to do this?  He wet his lips and craned his neck back to look up at Steve, who was looking down at him with half-lidded eyes, mouth slightly parted like he was about to say something, though the silence stretched on until Tony cleared his throat.

“Okay, so, you just sort of can move backwards and forwards, like this,” Tony instructed, shifting his feet against the planks of the deck.  “Then to the side.”  Steve mimicked the movements of Tony’s feet, picking up the simple steps in no time. “See, you’re a natural,” Tony whispered, voice cracking on the end.

“Just needed the right partner,” Steve responded after a beat in a deep, husky tone that went straight through Tony and coiled low in his belly, filling him with an impossible heat that left his mouth dry and heart pounding in his ears.  Tony dropped his gaze to just over Steve’s shoulder, where the canopy of stars spread out over the mountains.

I’m in love with him, Tony thought dizzily as the world tilted in front of his eyes, then righted itself.  The idea flooded through him, warming his limbs and sending a spasm through his chest that he realized was what it felt like when you forgot to breathe.  It wasn’t exactly a revelation, not really.  More like something he’d known, but just now remembered.  Like it had always been there, waiting for starlight dances, drawings of his robots and to be told it wasn’t his fault to unlock the memory.   Some kind of quest he hadn’t known he was on, and he’d finally found all the pieces.

The types as people I know


-Really outgoing when it comes to daily life interactions, but it’s harder for her to open up about personal things

-Always there if you need her, good listeners

-Generally lazy but very responsible if something interests her

-Very independent, she doesn’t need others to do things

-She tries to hide it but she gets very emotional when something happens to her

-Extremely creative


-So bossy

-Best time manager I’ve ever seen

-She rarely breaks the rules

-So hard working and organized, she studies every day

-She only does things the way she’s specifically been told to do them

-Loves compliments

-Dominant in relationships

-Addicted to shopping but somehow she never runs out of money


-Mysterious and shy when seen from the outside

-Very down-to-earth and with a clear mind and ideas

-She will listen to you for hours even if she has other problems

-Sometimes she needs to “disconnect” from the world

-She gives good advice but never follows any of it, specially concerning relationships

-She has a “mother complex” she likes fixing and taking care of people


-Good leader

-Very outspoken and outgoing

-He has deep and philosophical side

-He constantly tries to improve himself but he’s not competitive

-He puts a lot of effort in what he does and never gives up

-Funny and flirty

-Very optimistic


-He always has something to object, his favorite answer is “yes, but…”

-He looks so nice and adorable but when you know him he’s an asshole

-Loves analyzing people

-Needs change and freedom

-So critical with himself and other people

-Love talking about himself but not in an arrogant way

-Narcissistic af but with some insecurities


-Weird and mysterious, you never know what he’s thinking

-Doesn’t like letting others influence his decisions

-He hates being like everybody else

-He has a lot of deep thoughts and existential questions

-Loves partying and being with friends

ESFJ: (my mom)

-She literally sacrifices her life for the people she loves

-She has a lot of perseverance and willpower

-Gets mad so easily and takes everything personally but then she forgets

-She thinks everything that differs from what she believes or she doesn’t understand is wrong

-She’ll never admit her faults

-So natural and funny, she says the first thing that comes to her mind


-Her dark humor is great and scary at the same time

-She can be shy but she’s very outgoing when you know her

-She’s very independent and sometimes just cares about what she wants

-Looks more confident than she is

-Loves going out with her friends


-Very kind, cares about others


-Loves books, TV shows…etc

-Talks too fast

-Likes being with people but also spending a lot of time at home

-Gets mad easily but hold no grudges

-She acts selfish but also cares about others a lot

-Loves cooking

INTJ: (math professor)

-Might be a genius

-Doesn’t know how to interact with people, usually very very rude

-Values initiative and finding different ways to solve a problem

-So stubborn

-He lives in his own world

-He values rules and organization

ISTJ:  (my aunt)

-Super bossy, she could actually work in the army

-Surprisingly chill most of the time, loves to relax and try things

-Very organized, she always gets things done

-Has sudden bursts of anger that last like 30 seconds and then comes back to her chill state again

-Very independent


-Very talkative

-You can easily tell she is confident by the way she speaks

-Very independent, does what she wants

-Loves being the center of attention in small groups

-Smart and organized


-Very independent

-Loves to roast people

-Doesn’t study but for some reason he’s always lucky enough to pass

-Loyal friend

-Has a soft side he shows his friends and family

-Very funny

I found someone who loved me like he was afraid to lose me and it was real. He made me laugh, smile and cry; and taught me how to see the goodness inside of me I had long forgotten existed.
He listened to me talk for hours and told stories of his past and things that frightened him because he trusted me enough to know that I’d take his secret to my grave. He was right. It was so damn real and he loved me and I loved him back passionately; but it didn’t last cause he loved me, just not enough.
From time to time it still pains me to think that years down the lane his face won’t be the one I wake up to.
But darling, pain teaches you lessons, makes you stronger than ever before and I’ve learnt to find comfort in the lessons taught to me.
It taught me things about love and truth but mostly myself;
I am a deeply unhappy person who constantly needs someone to have my back when my thoughts turn into raging storms.
No, it wasn’t his fault that he left after realising the intensity of darkness inside of me but it was his fault to fool me into thinking he was brave enough to help me go through with it.
I was born with a sadness so overwhelming it frightens me too, sometimes.
But what I do know is that there’s someone out there feeling the same ache in his bones as I do and when it gets harder to make it through the day I’ll tell my heart to be patient for I haven’t found him yet.
When I finally find him I won’t ask him why he took so long to make our paths cross.
Instead; I’ll hold him, plant soft kisses on his face and ever so softly whisper, “welcome home, babe.”
—  I’ll wait for as many years as it takes because I’m certain you’re out there. // Rida Aamina (17.9.17)

anonymous asked:

BTS reaction to you telling them at dinner that you're sex life has become too dull PLEASE 😩💓


* You’re having dinner with the members. *

~ He looks at you for a while ~

“You’re kidding right?”

~ Looks at the other members. ~

“Don’t listen to her. She thinks it’s funny to say this in front of you… it’s just a joke.”

~ Doesn’t say anything else and spends the rest of the night thinking about it and thinking if you were serious and what in fucks name could you not be happy about. ~


~ It’s just you two at dinner. He’s eating and you say it quietly next to him. ~

~ Checks your temperature. ~

“Are you feeling ok? You feel a bit hot. It must be a fever and it’s making you hallucinate.” 

~ Takes off his phone and starts watching the homemade you recorded last week and makes sure you can see it as well. ~

“You don’t seem the least bit bored in this”


~ Fails miserably at hiding how deeply wounded that makes him feel ~

“You think so?”

(You) “I was just kidding! 😂”

~ Starts grilling meat again. ~

“You shouldn’t joke about things like that. I got worried.”

(You) “How could I say that after you made me cum 2 times just before this dinner?”

* Suga the rest of the night: *


~ He takes it very seriously plus he’s not happy that you’re doing this at dinner with other people.  ~ 

“Why didn’t you tell me this at home?”

“You wait until we get home. I’ll ask you about our ‘dull’ sex life tomorrow morning, we’ll see your answer.”


~ Taken aback. ~

“You know I’ve been sick… I didn’t even go do the Vlive with the guys today. That’s why… I’m sick!”


“You’re right. I’ve been working too much because of the comeback, we need to spend more time together, it’s my fault. I’m sorry.”

“I promise I’ll make it up to you.”


~ He was not expecting it at all. He just looks at you… ~

(You ~touching him~): “Babe say something…”

“Can we talk about it when we get home?”

~ He spaces out during the whole time you’re at the restaurant. He stares at you completely lost in his thoughts.~

** When you get home he talks to you right away saying that he thought everything was perfect but he will do anything to make it better for you. **

by: TopBtsSmut

gif © - ♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎ 

I’m done with you, Mr. Wayne - Bruce Wayne x Reader (angst?)

First, thank you very much for your comment, and then here for a somewhat angsty story based off your prompt  :-) ( I never know if I achieved my goal in making people feel with my stories so you know…). Hope you’ll like it :

My masterlist blog : https://ella-ravenwood-archives.tumblr.com


No matter what his brothers were telling him, how hard they were trying to reassure him and convince him that he did nothing wrong, Damian still thought it was his fault. Without him, none of that would have happened.

If he had been more careful, this all situation could have been avoided. His father wouldn’t be heart broken, and his mom…his mom…

No matter what his brothers were telling him, how hard they were trying to reassure him and convince him that he did nothing wrong, Damian still thought it was his fault. Without him, none of that would have happened.

Without him, his mother…He couldn’t even think the words. It hurts too much. To think he was the cause of it all ? It was even worst.

No matter what his brothers were telling him, how hard they were trying to reassure him and convince him that he did nothing wrong, Damian still thought it was his fault. Without him, none of that would have happened.

Without him…Without him…Without him his mother would have never left.

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A Rock and a Hard Place

killing children to protect children; dying and the resulting deaths

So I’ve decided to do something terribly stupid and try to address a really difficult aspect of this week’s chapter: Kaneki’s decision to kill Hajime and the Oggai. 

First and foremost, I want to bring us back to the middle ages, to Yamori, when  two inherent flaws in Kaneki’s personality were fully revealed to us. His discussion with Imaginary Rize involved his token slogan “be the one who gets hurt, not the one who hurts others”– a gift from his mother, which he has struggled to loosen his grip on throughout the entire story. 

Unknowingly, Yamori challenged that very belief with an ugly mind-game:

By not being able to choose (despite Kei’s insistence to save her son), both mother and child were killed. He failed to even try. 

Kaneki faltered like any person would have in his situation, but it underscored what would ultimately become a huge problem for him in the future. He has always struggled to do harm and to make difficult decisions that hold him responsible (a complex most likely created by deep-rooted feelings of helplessness after a childhood full of neglect and loss).

Fast-forward to today’s chapter, we find Kaneki faced with a magnification of the same situation. At the end of E14, Touka, Hinami, and a flock of starving ghouls unable to fight– many of which are children– are backed into a corner by an inescapable death. Nearby, Kaneki is laying in a bloodied, limbless, lifeless heap, surrounded on all sides by a hoard of deadly child-soldiers.

Without Kaneki’s intervention, Goat’s children will be slaughtered like lambs. However, in order for Kaneki to intervene, he would have to slaughter children himself. It’s a total conundrum that Ishida has purposefully created; a twisted, horrifying, challenging predicament for us to muddle through… hence the name of the Oggai: 

Death, mirrored. A behemoth wrong from all angles.

With this, Furuta is Yamori dangling lives in front of his face once more. He’s Arima, handing Kaneki the opportunity to win on a silver platter….

… But more than anything, Furuta is Furuta: a man barefacedly showcasing the CCG’s dirty little secret in a stunt that the average investigator is still willing to overlook.

Furuta confirms here that it really is no problem controlling the masses. So long as they feel unified on the front to Defeat Evil™, a person won’t look at their own wickedness in the mirror. 

The last chapter was the first time we heard Kaneki reflect on his decisions and life choices outside of admitting his inability to do so in Cochlea. But unlike Cochlea, we finally see him take a grand step forward. He considers dying here (again knowing that a chunk of his adopted family is in grave danger), but despite adversity, FINALLY digs his nails into life and comes tearing all horns and thorns back to the surface.

HOWEVER. I want to reiterate that what he’s done is still sickening. It isn’t the Oggai’s fault that they are who they are, and no less now that Furuta has fanned the flames of their personal vendettas against ghouls. They are all just children who– like the Garden Kids– have been exploited by means outside of their control.

Has Ishida made this theme blindingly apparent yet?

The thing is, Kaneki understands the nature of act he’s about to commit. It doesn’t necessarily make him right, but he understands the gravity of the situation.

He does interject with uglier thoughts (”I don’t care”, “I will kill”)– BUT! He also considers those old flaws of his and finally, finally kicks them aside. 

Furuta accused him of never learning; of always choosing himself. He’s always put his own moral righteousness above actual life. He’s never killed humans, never choose one life over another, and never made an honest decision that forced him to take responsibility for his actions. And for all of that, he has done nothing but suffer. 

But now, in the face of all that, Kaneki gathers up all of his experiences over the last several years, pins positives against each other, outweighs the cons, and for the first time ever reaches a solid conclusion: kill, and put an end to the senseless murders the Oggai might commit in the future. Kill, and save those innocent children and the people he loves. Kill, and take control of the the life he’s been handed. Kill, even at the expense of others. 

Who wants to read some Tiny Patton thoughts, kiddos?

By popular demand, HERE WE GO!!! @cefmua56 @cleopolitian (thank you for talking headcannons with me, you’re the best!) @pirate-patton (because I loved your fic so much) @holdnarrytight @romananalogicality @princey-must-slay @leesacrakon

- When Logan felt a tug on his pantleg, he closed his eyes and prayed to every god he never believed in to be wrong. Then he looked down into a pair of big, brown eyes behind glasses much too large for his face. Welp, if he needed further proof that gods are fictional, here’s Exhibit A.

- “WHAT THE HECK DID YOU DO THIS TIME, ROMAN?!” Logan’s irritated shout brought the other two sides to the kitchen, where a very Tiny Patton was sitting on the counter, swinging his legs and giggling.

- “WHY does everyone always blame ME for these things?!” Virgil rolled his eyes at Princey’s affronted response.

“Because it has literally been your fault the last two times this happened, Sir Sing A Lot.”

-“….Touché, point well made Sir Surlypants.”

“When did I become a Sir???”

- If he weren’t entirely certain that screaming in rage would frighten Patton, Logan would have done it twice by now.

- They all thought Tiny Patton would be the easiest to handle. THEY THOUGHT WRONG.

- Tiny Patton is the embodiment of emotions, and without his maturity to help control him, he is…. volatile.

- Logan swiftly memorizes all of Tiny Patton’s preferences: which stuffie is his favorite, which pajamas ward off monsters, which sippy cup is correct and which juice is best (never making THOSE mistakes again).

- He blames Roman entirely for Patton suddenly referring to him as “Momma” instead of the much more preferable “Lo Lo”.

- It was actually Virgil who taught him that. He smirks every single time Tiny Patton says it.

- Patton adores Virgil, and if you thought he was protective of Tiny Roman, hoooo boy! There are new and fascinating depths to Virgil’s Protective Instinct™ and he doesn’t necessarily want to deal with why that is.

-Tiny Patton is a cuddle bug. He constantly asks to be carried, crawls into beds and laps and makes himself comfortable. Whether you’re frantically searching for a cure or not, as Logan found out. He is also an expert in why removing Tiny Patton from his perch is inadvisable.

- Logan sighed as Patton’s chubby hands lightly traced his face. Tiny Patton had an adorable, dreamy smile on his own face, but he was quiet and happy, so Logan wasn’t complaining. “Momma Lo Lo so pitty!”

- Logan’s eyes widened comically and he stared at the smaller counterpart. “I beg your pardon??? Are you calling me… pretty???”

- Tiny Patton’s enthusiastic nod was NOT adorable. “Momma Lo Lo so pitty! Love my Momma!”

- The warmth spreading over his cheeks was absolutely NOT a blush, Logic does not blush, STOP SNICKERING VIRGIL IT’S NOT FUNNY!

- Thomas groaned out loud when they popped up to tell him. “NOT AGAIN!!! Roman, why???”


“You keep telling yourself that, Princey.”

*Outraged Princey Noises*

- Tiny Patton tries his best to help Thomas, but he’s just not the best at it. Thomas finds himself responding in overly emotional ways, wanting to stomp his feet and pout when he doesn’t get his way, wanting to sob at every sad thing, wanting to giggle when he was happy. It was frustrating, but he understood, and he didn’t blame Patton.

- It’s really late, or early, depending on your perspective. Logan’s hair is mussed from constantly carding his fingers through it in frustration. Virgil is on the bed, skimming through his own stack of books, and Roman created a chair in the corner to lend a hand. Tiny Patton is curled up with his head on Virgil’s chest, one thumb firmly in his mouth, his favorite stuffie under his arm.

- They’ve been trying to reverse this for weeks, but so far nothing has worked. If it were magic, a spell from Roman’s kingdom, fixing Patton would be easy. They’ve been here before, after all. But it’s not, and with every passing day Logan can feel the knot in his stomach tighten.

- An aborted sob is forced out through perfectly clenched teeth, and Logan can feel hot, frustrated tears prickling behind his eyes.

- Virgil’s head snaps up, surprised to see the Logical side’s shoulders hunched, one hand over his mouth. Roman immediately drops what he’s doing and puts a tentative hand on Logan’s shoulder.

- “I’m failing. I’m failing Thomas, Patton, all of us. This isn’t WORKING and we NEED him!” The words rush out of him, each one bitter on his tongue. Tears blur his glasses, and he takes them off, tossing them on his desk.

“What if I can’t fix this? What if he’s like this forever?!”

- Virgil gently moves Tiny Patton and brings a trembling Logan in for a hug. Roman wraps his arms around both of them. It’s the fear they’ve all had, the unspoken worst case scenario that nobody wanted to acknowledge. The thought of never seeing Patton as an adult again was painful to all of them. Tiny Patton was adorable, but….

- “We’ll find a way to get Dad back, Lo.”

“Indeed! If anyone can solve this puzzle, it’s you.”

- There was a beat of silence, and then a loud ripping sound. Three heads whipped towards the bed to see Patton, adult again and clutching the blanket on Logan’s bed to cover his ripped tiny pajamas. His eyes blinked owlishly for a second before a familiar smile crossed his face.

- “Well, wasn’t this was a SEAMLESS transition!”

- Logan couldn’t help it. As relief and joy swamped him in equal measures, he threw his head back and laughed….at a Dad Joke.