he stayed up all night thinking about what it all means

Masturbating and Michael walks in *smut* *requested*

“can u do apreference were ur best friends with mike and live together and while he’s at rehearsal u were super horny and started pleasuring yourself then he comes back home,u notice him but doesn’t stop, start moaning his name while he’s dumbfounded”

AN: I wasn’t sure if you wanted him to join in at the end or not so I kinda left it open to the imagination.

Words: 874

Warning: Smut

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- ten -

“I’ll let you drag me to hell if it means you’ll hold my hand.” 


Niall was right, I had to make sure I was going to class. I really didn’t have any other choice. I either went or I would get kicked out of the program. And then what? Go back home? I didn’t want to even begin to think of that.

My struggle was that even with me physically going to my classes, my mind, all my thoughts and energy, was so fucking focused on him. What he was doing, where he was going, who he was with. I literally could not think of anything else, let alone concentrate. He was consuming me. It was daunting even thinking about sleeping in his bed all night next to him, then having to get up in the morning and leave. I just…didn’t want to. I wanted to stay with him, I wanted to be around him, around Cash. It was all I wanted.

I tried to go to school, over the next two weeks I really tried, but at this point nothing even made sense anymore and it just made me even more frustrated than before. I was so lost in my studies and it did worry me to think what could happen, but it bothered me more to be away from Cash and Niall than it did to miss school.

And that scared me.

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Millennium

(pre-episode)

She made plans months ago to spend Christmas with her mom at Bill & Tara’s. Of course, at the time, she didn’t anticipate having any compelling reason to stay in town, but as she kisses Mulder goodbye on the night before her flight, she is undeniably tempted to cancel. The idea of quietly celebrating the holiday with him is vastly more appealing than the prospect of putting up a happy front for her family while trying to ignore all of the inevitable reminders of Emily.

“I don’t know why I agreed to go,” she says with a sigh, her forehead pressed against his. “What was I thinking?”

He pulls her all the way in for a hug, tucking the top of her head under his chin in the way that makes her feel protected and secure. She nestles in even closer and sighs again.

“If I had to guess–” His words reverberate through his chest against her ear. “–I’d say you were thinking about how much Christmas and family mean to your mom.” She pulls back to look up at him, and he quirks his lips in a half-smile. “I’m pretty sure your brother’s charming disposition wasn’t the primary motivating factor.”

She chuckles, shaking her head. “Be nice.”

He leans down, pressing a soft kiss to her lips as his thumbs stroke her shoulders. She actively tries to capture the moment, to find a way to preserve the warmth in her that his touch induces, so she’ll have it to call on while they’re apart. The moment is, sadly, over far too soon, and then he’s stepping backward and shooing her out the door.

“Go enjoy San Diego. Play with Matthew, hug your mom. I’ll see you in a week.”

***

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I know how much suffering we’ve seen through these 10 episodes of Sherlock, but i honestly believe we’ve lucked out. I’m positive if we watched S1/S2 through Sherlock’s POV and then S3/TAB through John’s POV we’d really be begging for mercy.

Imagine watching how Sherlock reacts internally to all of those people being so incredibly mean to him throughout S1/S2. Imagine Sherlock watching John date woman after woman and never choosing him. How could we have survived watching Sherlock internalize his fears that night in Dartmoor when he told John he didn’t have friends? Imagine what kind of breakdown Sherlock must’ve had after his only friend in the world walked out on him. He could’ve stayed up the whole night crying for all we know. How much must it have hurt Sherlock to watch John at his grave say his goodbye? Sherlock didn’t know if he’d ever make it back. He left thinking his only friend wouldn’t wonder about him, wouldn’t try to find out how he’s doing. He watched John literally turn his back on him, closing that chapter possibly forever. Watching through Sherlock’s POV would’ve been too tough for audiences.

Now imagine John finding out the love of his life is alive but that he still doesn’t love him back. John knows he’s stuck between a rock and a hard place - being with Sherlock but not having a complete relationship or sticking with Mary and taking what he can get? How much would it have hurt to watch John leave 221b after he saw Janine parade around in her underwear? He spent all day convinced Sherlock was straight and in love with her; he could’ve spent the whole day holding back tears, calling himself a fool for ever thinking he may have had a chance with Sherlock. And the day after the stag night? When John tried one last time to get Sherlock to rescue him? How hard do you think John was on himself when that didn’t work? How about blaming himself for Sherlock’s injury? He truly believes everything is his fault. What about Saying goodbye on the tarmac but not being able to tell Sherlock all of those things he’s been meaning to say because his wife was there too? Imagine John saying goodbye to Sherlock forever, then having Sherlock return, only to watch him again almost die from an overdose.

The stories left unsaid are the true tragedies here. At least that was true up until this point. Now their story arc is almost complete and soon everything will be on the table regarding their romance, back stories, loyalties, and fears - then we will see true pain. We will see true horror. Brace yourself for the worst possible tragedies because soon our characters won’t be able to hide any more.

but like am i the only who sees luke falling asleep in the hospital room with michael and when he wakes up, michaels staring at him with this soft smile and lukes like “what” and michaels just like “you stayed the whole night” and lukes just like “yeah man i wouldn’t leave you” and they kinda both just smile at each other and michael says “come cuddle me you dork” and luke gets his tall ass self in the hospital bed and tries to cuddle mikey the best he can in the small bed and finally just settles on one leg off one leg on and some silence passes until luke says “i’m so glad you’re okay” and michael nods and gets all quiet all of a sudden and luke can tell that means he’s thinking about something so he tells one of his bad jokes and all you hear is both of their giggling and michael saying “shut up luke” hoLY SHIT I NEED NEED NEED THIS

One of my friends really opened up to me the other night and what he went through made me think a lot. That’s because the situation he’s in was the following, he dated a girl for TWO YEARS and a half. Two fucking years, two years of his life, two years of shared memories, two years FULL of promises, two years full of love, two years that he realized that he wasn’t in love with her. He literally was not in love with her at all, he just couldn’t feel it, basically forced himself to stay with her. Ladies and gentlemen, this what I mean about time not meaning anything at all. You CAN love or fall in love someone in a matter of three short months, or be with someone for YEARS and feel nothing at all, like unfortunately my friend has. And this is why I’m terrified of falling in love, because she was completely in love with him and he wasn’t. He made her believe that everything was ok so he wouldn’t hurt her and he thought by letting time pass, things were gonna change. Let me tell ya’ll something, if you don’t feel happy with someone NOW you will NEVER feel happy with someone years down the road. So do yourself a favor, as much as you think it’ll hurt you or your significant other please just end the relationship. If you think it’s not really going anywhere, they don’t make you happy, you don’t love them or are in love with them then end it. It’s not fair for that person that IS in love with you, it’s not their faults you couldn’t feel anything. Please don’t be selfish and let your partner be happy with someone who has the potential to provide that feeling for them.
—  Learning Through People’s Mistakes
May 27th, 2015