he looks like a kid in the last one how is it even possible

*pounds fist on table* ok i need to talk about the god-tier klance moments in s3e03 “the hunted” because damn there’s a couple scenes that are so powerful and important and i just….holy shit. buckle up, y’all.

this episode is fucking great for a lot of reasons, but one of my favorite parts of it is how much it shows the development of keith & lance’s relationship: especially 1) how good lance has become at grounding keith & helping him control his reckless impulses, and 2) how keith feels like he can be open and honest with lance about his fears/insecurities––which is a big fucking deal because we’ve almost never seen him do this. 

the first scene that really struck me is this part where keith is leading the team after lotor and it’s just….a big mess. he’s not thinking about keeping the team together. allura’s falling behind and he’s not paying any attention. he’s not considering that this might be a trap. all he can think about is diving in headfirst without considering the consequences.

and then this happens:

uhhhh….oh my god??

look, we know how keith gets. we know how hot-headed and stubborn he can be. i mean listen, we’re talking about this kid who literally tried to fight zarkon by himself.

and yet…..even in the middle of this intense chase, lance gets through to him. he brings keith down from that battle-rage and makes him see reason. and he does it in a way that’s straightforward and brutally honest (“you’re endangering the team and you can’t do this”) which i think is exactly why it works. that’s the kind of direction keith needs, and tbh out of everyone on the team it makes the most sense that it comes from lance.

i’m just

me: hey can i get a fucking uhhhhh lance being keith’s impulse control
dreamworks: *gives me this*
me: *kicking down the door* HOLY FUCK MOM

and look i was already sobbing over this one small part but then we get THIS….THIS SCENE….

oh boy oh wow where do i stART?!

god damn this scene is beautiful––visually, thematically, it’s just …. so powerful and significant.

first of all i need to freak out a little over the way the scene is set up and how wonderful the symbolism is. 

it starts with keith literally in the shadows, and then slowly emerging and drifting up towards lance with their lions facing each other. lance & red are above keith & black which is really interesting.

as we all know, keith is the leader right now. and yet, both literally and figuratively, he’s not positioning himself higher than lance––in fact, he’s doing the very opposite. and his lion doesn’t have her head lowered in shame either; the lions are directly looking each other in the eyes (which i feel like is pretty damn rare??) and that’s very meaningful. everything about the visual setup of the scene just screams openness, honesty, vulnerability. 

(side note: also wow @ that red and blue background, amiright)

and then we have everything that keith says. and boy….there’s so much to unpack here:

- he admits it was his fault and he led everyone into a trap
- he also admits that everyone warned him (lance warned him) and he wasn’t listening
- and because of that he put everyone else in danger

and man i gotta give huge props to steven yeun here because his voice acting in this scene….jeez it broke my heart. keith says all this so quietly, his voice is literally shaking. shit, he sounds close to tears. this is possibly the closest we’ve ever seen keith to totally breaking down and it’s just…..it hurts so much and it’s so important.

it really hits you in this moment that keith is a kid. he’s a teenager!! he didn’t want to lead the team & he doesn’t know how to do it. he can’t do it by himself. he doesn’t say any of that explicitly here but it’s 100% clear that that’s exactly what he’s saying.

and he says this to lance of all people. lance, his supposed “rival”! you would think lance would be the last person he’d want to turn to for reassurance or to blatantly admit “wow i fucked up real bad.” and yet….here we are. it’s moments like these that really prove that under the surface, these two don’t hate each other in the least. they like each other. they respect each other. they rely on each other!! (*whispers* space ranger partners….) 

and lance’s response only proves my point even more. he could easily have said “i told you so” or otherwise berated keith for his mistake. but he doesn’t! his answer is:

- yes, you messed up.
- but we’re going to fix it. we. i can’t stress that enough! he doesn’t say “you messed up and now you have to do something about it.” he doesn’t say “you messed up and now i’m going to take over and do something about it.” he’s essentially saying “yeah you made a mistake but that’s in the past….and now we’re going to take care of it together.” 

and that’s?? so great?? because keith more or less admitted that he was feeling this huge burden weigh down on him, and lance––in his own subtle way––lifted that weight off keith’s shoulders. he’s reassuring keith that he’s not alone in this. *wipes tears from my eyes*

and if all that wasn’t enough, keith immediately saying “you’re right” makes it all the more significant. he’s openly admitting once again that he fucked up, but he’s also agreeing with lance’s statement that they can still turn things around and fix his mistake as a team. which is…..wow. 

tl;dr - everything about this pair of scenes just proves how keith & lance work so well together and need each other. it shows how important it is for them to be open and honest with each other, and demonstrates how they both have that capability. 

and i’m gonna scream about it for a hundred years. 

EDIT II: This post has been going around as definite proof that the Cult Ending is fact, and the real way the game works. As such, I’ve been accused of spreading misinformation, to a degree that I’ve been getting extremely toxic and damaging messages.

I want to clarify at this point, this post was made as a vent, back when the data-mine of the Cult End was beginning, and we first got the info that it was a file in the game. The Data-Mine is pretty much finished now, at this point; nothing new to find. And it’s revealed that, while the ending is in a playable state, no coding in the game actually makes it possible to play it. There’s no outcome you can get to trigger this end.

No one is sure if this is a cut ending, future DLC, or if it’s a bug messing up the coding trigger. All we know is we found it, and I made a post too hasty in assumption. I made it when we still thought it was possible to achieve.

So please. Take this with a grain of salt. I don’t want to delete this post, as I feel like it would give the bad impression that I simply wanted to spread fire, with no care for repercussions. But I do want people to know I’ve learned now.

I’m sorry to everyone that I deceived with this. It wasn’t my intention at all, but execution doesn’t always pan out like we hope.


EDIT III: Good god, how often am I going to be updating this post.

Well, we have verification the ending isn’t as scrapped as we thought it was.

An update patch for Dream Daddy to fix bugs and add Robert’s Whittling minigame also secretly updated the coding of the Cult Ending. This info was found VIA data-mining the Level18 files as they were before and after.

The updated files include more trigger codings, and has added the achievement trigger for what we presume is “Escape the Margarita Zone,” as it is listed as “ACHIEVEMENT_SECRET.”

While it doesn’t necessarily mean the ending is definitely going to be playable in the future, it does make the ending’s chances of becoming a possible canon that much more of a reality.


Man. The reveal of what Joseph actually is both amazes and horrifies me further than what we’ve seen.

Okay, so data-mining revealed that Joseph does have a good ending, but it’s not much different from the bad. He still remains with Mary, but he takes you in as a side-man (AKA, he stays with you to continue an affair on Mary.) It’s not very good either, so I won’t be surprised to see people voice disappointment when they get it.

HOWEVER, data-mining found something even worse in the code. And that is Joseph has a third ending, a secret ending, and potentially, the TRUE ending of not only his route, but the game entirely. This ending has been dubbed “cult ending.”

This ending ended up revealing that Joseph is not at all what he seems. He’s not a man living a broken marriage, forcing himself to stay with an alcoholic and cheating wife to have some semblance of a family life with his kids. No, this family he’s created is simply a facade to hide who he is.

Joseph isn’t human. He some sort of demonic entity that has an ulterior motive. His children aren’t truly his children in the sense that you’d assume, they’re more like broken portions of himself, inhabiting child-like forms. And Mary is a woman who was forced to play a role to paint a picture, an illusion. Something she can’t escape from, because Joseph literally has her wrapped around his finger.

Joseph also is a leader of a cult (Obviously, given the fact that this ending is dubbed “cult end.”) I’m not too knowledgeable about the cult, but apparently it’s a front to rituals and the like. We know Robert was, at one point, a part of the cult, but isn’t any longer.

And finally, we know Joseph is drawing forth energy from other single dads, possibly both sexually and ritualistically, to bring the “Eternal King” back to life. He specifically needs the energy from single dads, and with some sort of dark magic, he lures them to his part of town for ease of access. He also is responsible for causing the events of them all being single. Every single dad, he influenced their destinies to fuel his own ambitions.

And once you find this out, you start noticing shit everywhere! There’s symbols of his cult in practically every part of town. Certain behaviors give an odd feeling. It’s just… it’s shocking to go back in to see this.

The cult end finishes with a man name Saul Graves coming to speak to you, and telling you to try and live your life normally. I’m not sure the entirety of the end, I guess it implies Joseph is on the run now? I don’t know, if anyone can clarify it, let me know.

Now, this was a beyond shocking twist to a lot of people. Especially since the game is so comedic, and the other routes, while they may have poignant moments, it’s nothing completely horrifying. I know I certainly was beyond stunned to discover this, but I honestly had a feeling something would happen like this. Though I wasn’t expecting it to actually be Joseph’s route to cause this; I thought it would’ve been a route where you don’t date any dads!

And I know that there’s some speculation that the “cult end” isn’t truly canon (As in, Joseph isn’t actually in a cult or is a demon, it’s just there for intrigue) and is just a dream end. But the fact you start noticing shit after experiencing the end, imagery and encounters, it just… I really can’t see this as being nothing but the truth. Even if you don’t get the ending where you find out what Joseph truly is, he’s still a demonic entity with dark motives, influencing the town and its people to his goals.

And then there’s something that’s honestly quite saddening to think. It’s because of the fact that, even if you don’t get the cult end, it doesn’t change what Joseph is. He’s using single dads’ energy to summon his King to the world. He SPECIFICALLY needs single dads. He has caused all of the other dads to lose their significant other to further his goals, from divorce to death. He’s the reason they’re single in the first place.

Because of this, you pairing up with a dad doesn’t give me a good feeling. Because he needs the dads to be single to draw their energy. And he doesn’t care about “true love” or “good ends.” He’ll tear you apart to forward his goals.

Joseph doesn’t care if Craig’s ending was the cutest thing anyone’s experienced. Joseph doesn’t care if you truly have a connection to Mat.

He needs you two to be single to feed off of you both. And he knows how to break you two apart without anyone ever expecting a thing.

Basically, the reveal of what Joseph is makes me look in fear at all of the other dads, look in fear of their good ends. Because even if it’s a happy end we experienced in what we saw, it implies it’s not meant to last. Down the road, we’ll either be broken up by Joseph’s influences, or he’ll influence one of our’s deaths.

And we won’t think anything odd about it. We’ll just think it didn’t work out, or that life is a cruel mistress.

This is so sinister, like I both love it for the intrigue, but hate it because I genuinely wanted cute moments, and now knowing what Joseph is, I can’t see them as cute anymore. I can’t see myself being happy with any of the Dad’s routes, because there’s that looming thought that it’ll just end in sadness again.

Fucking christ. I didn’t sign up for Dream Daddy to be this dark.


EDIT: This post really blew up, to the point that people are wondering if I’m making shit up due to lack of sources. I wasn’t intending this to get big, it was a vent/personal post, with at most some theories on implications that I thought would get lost to the various other posts people make. I made a reblog showing links that give more info, but for future people that find the post, here are various links on the info we have on the route.

Here’s some images found that pertain to this ending.

Here’s a transcript of how the route goes, from people descrambling the code. Also contains some more images.

Better quality textures of “Cultist Joseph.”

And finally, here’s how people did the data-mine.

Losing your virginity to Peter Parker would include..

- excuse the gif but it fits because homeboy is a whole ass NERD LMFAO

- anyways

- it happens at the absolute best moment when the both of you are ready

- peter being an absolute angel about it

- but also super duper nervous 

- not gonna lie he probably watched some porn beforehand

- ‘there’s no way i’m doing that’

- still has no idea what to do

- buying like 3 boxes of condoms because he didn’t know what size to buy (stay safe, kids!)

- literally wanting to die at the register, nearly runs out of the shop afterwards

- being the one that kisses him first, your heart jumping when you hear him moan and melt into your touch

- he’s in awe of your body 

Keep reading

Stranger Things Season 2 trailer shot by shot run down

I do not claim or own any of these screenshots all rights to Netflix


aw look at my children doing normal children things can’t wait to see how long that’s going to last 

so, the way that Dungeons and Dragons was sort of the running analogy last season, my guess is that this game is going to be the overlying symbolism for this season.

my boys all back together and happy again can’t wait to see how long that’ll last :’)

so if this is the analogy I’m guessing the “sword” is going to be the key to slaying the monster

again, the dragon probably = the monster

and if so, the fact that Dustin seemingly LOST this game sort of worries me…

case in point

this trailer took approximately 15 seconds to get me to say “oh no”

AS I WAS SAYING (okay so obviously from what we left off on last season and the trailers/ teaser we’ve gotten. we now know this season is going to deal with the aftermath of the Upside Down for Will as well as the entire community as rifts have been opened to other worlds)

so i’m assuming Will’s main arc this season is going to be his struggle with being split between two worlds, and though I understand why they did it I wish we could see more of Will apart from that but oh well)

me too buddy, me too.

and thus, we have our big bad for the season *rubs hands together*

mike he is obviously not okay but thanks for being concerned

correct me if i’m wrong but is that Jonathan’s car? why is he leaving?

sooooo why isn’t Will at school?

stancy break up/ tension possibly? nothing good ever really comes from their meeting in this ally

aw…is this why he wasn’t in school? Joyce obviously knows something is up. (side note: is that Hopper behind them?)

oh come on-

these SOBs again?

so i guess maybe the Upside Down;s bleeding over to our world effect crops too???????

Hopper and Joyce as parents yes please (also Will is not okay)

“I felt it everywhere” wtf is that supposed to mean that’s terrifying

please just let the Byers family live someone give them a break

why do they look so suspect? who are they looking at?

honestly I’m loving the Halloween time theme I can’t wait for the aesthetics they’re going to be implementing

my connection/ insider I have previously hinted to me about a Steve/ kids dynamic that was going to be happening this season, but I’m actually very interested to see where this goes and the relationships that’ll come out of it

again with the aesthetics !!! yes !!! please!!! and !!! thank !!! you !!!

when the scientists are worried, it’s really time to get worried

uuuhhhhh yikes? blood is never a good sign?

ESPECIALLY AROUND DUSTIN NO DO NOT WANT THIS TRAILER IS MAKING ME REALLY CONCERNED ABOUT HIS SAFETY AS A CHARACTER

ah yes all is probably not well at the Wheeler household 

of course my dork sons all go trick or treating in matching Ghost Busters costumes I love them

it looks like he’s tracking something. buuuuut what?

HOP!! I MISSED YOU AND YOUR PERPETUALLY CONFUSED EYEBROWS

oooohhhhhh these boys look like they’re crushing on the new giiirrrllll 👀 (mainly Lucas and Dustin? maybe Will I can’t tell) (except for Mike because they really are doing everything they can to bury me in Mileven feels)

I can literally feel her angst radiating off the screen and I have a feeling I’m going to stan her unless the writers use her as a devise to cause tension or rivalry among the boys in which case someone is going to die

“Sometimes I feel like I can still see her” WHY DO THE WRITERS FEEL THE NEED TO HURT ME LIKE THIS GAH I MISS MILEVEN HE EVEN KEPT HER BLANKET FORT UP  (because also it’s important to note that this is the same shirt from the screenshot of them watching the girl walk in. so if Mike goes home and realizes he still misses I’m going to choke)

can’t wait for this to most likely just be a cat jump scare

they’re building something don’t ask me what

if I had to guess I would say some sort of device that picks up on signals from the Upside Down maybe? like some sort of crystal radio?

but why does Mike kind of look like hes going to smash it with the speaker?

new girl seems to be working with them/ part of the group now. but the box opened? idk this part is confusing

-EDIT/ UPDATE THANKS TO @disneyprincesskatherine apparently this is a reference to Ghostbusters! the box is similar to a device they use in the movies to catch ghost (i’m uncultured I’m so sorry). she also speculates this is the capture of the sort of “pet” Dustin gets that Gaten talked about (could also be why there is blood on Dustin’s chair)

okay but where is #4? they’re still in their Halloween costumes so we can assume it’s either the day of or the morning after, though on what looked to be Halloween night in one of the previous screencaps, all 4 were present soooo

more evidence of the world meshing

YOU BEST BELIEVE I SCREAMED OUT LOUD I MISSED THEM (they both looks so good I‘m loving the haircuts) (and is this them breaking into the lab?)

even though this is a gross slimy portal to another dimension, i’m still digging the aesthetics

Will is not okay part 87450507

this is either a drawing of a map of the Upside Down or all connecting tree roots. either way wtf Will?

This time on: OTPs With Unreal Height Differences 

it kind of looks like the same “tree roots” on the ground as there were at the gas station shot so yeah, I think Will was drawing a giant root system

🎶 you’re my daaad, you’re my dad, boogie woogie woogie 🎶

DREAM TEAM (Mike, Nancy, Jonathan, Joyce) (also can we laugh at the fact that Mike is armed with a candle holder while he stands next to his sister literally holding a shot gun)

Hop digging my grave for when I finish the season

*cues classic 80′s teen movie party montage*

my girl wildin out (and Steve’s there too I guess)

TELL ME WHO HURT YOU (this is a different outfit from the party though, so it’s not the same scene)

a new weapon? perhaps the “sword”?

!!!!!!

OH GOD TELL ME HOP IS OKAY

everyone in this trailer looks as shook as I feel watching it

Will Is Not Okay: The Saga Continues

same shirt so most likely what he’s experiencing on the other side. I’m almost certain he’s going to play a big role in Eleven being able to come back to the other side

Journey To The Center of the Earth (2008)

well well well, Samwise Gamgee, what’s poppin’

why does Steve have Jonathan’s bat?

as far as I can tell this treck into the Upside Down consists of Mike, Dustin, Joyce, and I can’t tell who the others are 

“ABORT ABORT!!!” (this is a different scene from the one above so I wonder what this is in reference to)

another shot of Will being scared out of his mind, this kid doesn’t ever get a break (though the background looks almost like the lab as opposed to the upside down. I could be wrong)

…well that’s concerning (kind of looks like that giant monster is chasing him)

“If you’re out there, please just give me a sign”

so this looks to be back in the Upside Down equivalent to the classroom where Eleven defeated the Demegorgan. and based on the look on her face and the previous shot above, it seems she JUST woke up

YES MY BADASS CHILD I NEVER DOUBTED YOU FOR A SECOND

yES HER RETURN IS ABOUT TO BE ICONIC

YALL MIND IF I WILD OUT OVER THESE AESTHETICS AGAIN

I’m so freaking happy for her return to Mike us

Lord almighty this season looks amazing.

A NONEXHAUSTIVE ANIME RECOMMENDATION LIST

CLASSICS (you’ve probably watched these already):

  • Neon Genesis Evangelion : depression, adolescence & mecha: the anime
  • Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann : depression, adolescence & mecha: the remake
  • Kill La Kill: see above, but with a commentary on fanservice and the anime industry. also main female characters
  • Death Note : morally ambiguous main character kills people, eats potato chips. everyone loses their shit
  • Fullmetal Alchemist (both 2003 and Brotherhood) : 2 brothers fuck shit up, also save the world through alchemy.
  • Cowboy Bebop : guns in space
  • Every Goddamn Ghibli Movie : do it, you weakling. watch them all theyre all good
  • Ghost In The Shell : theres more than just the first movie. watch the other ones. also the tv series. do it. its about being human
  • Yu-Gi-Oh : believe in the power of the fucking cards karen

CLASSICS II (you probably haven’t watched these and it makes me sad):

  • Perfect Blue : the movie black swan tried (and failed) to rip off properly
  • Future Boy Conan : because miyazaki also does tv series
  • Revolutionary Girl Utena : sword lesbian, a lesbian with a sword
  • Oban Star Racers : racing, but in space. half french
  • Mushishi : spirits, in all their contemplative beauty
  • Black Jack (the OVAs are the best but you can watch the rest as well): the original Dr House, with more money and assholery
  • Koi Kaze : quite possibly the only redeemable anime about incest
  • Sherlock Hound: did i mention miyazaki doing great tv series yet

SHONEN (young boys fuck shit up):

  • My Hero Academia : crybaby protagonist turns out to be most loveable character of all time. becomes a cool hero. love him
  • Mob Psycho 100 : a show about a boy who just wants to be good. ONE manifests in your house to physically punch shonen tropes in the face. breathtaking animation. read the manga before tho. trust me
  • Avatar The Last Airbender (& Avatar The Legend Of Korra) : fuck you its anime because i fucking said so. watch it. the story is great and culturally diverse and also cool shit happens
  • Naruto & Naruto Shippuden : whatever you say some arcs were fucking legendary so whenever you want just watch some cool, non-filler shit. every thing after the Pain arc doesnt matter dont watch it
  • Soul Eater: i have no goddamn clue whats going on but it looks cool.
    also spirit vore
  • Hunter x Hunter : young boy adopts new adults in his family, gets killer best friend. literally
  • Keroro Gunsou : alien frogs try to take over the world. it,,,,, doesnt work very well. featuring otaku frog, angry frog, gay fanboy frog, gay nerd frog, alone frog as well as many other things. the humans are also good
  • Wakfu : its. basically french anime. fantasy stuff, it has great animation (especially in the later episodes) and the main villains are fucking incredible. its on netflix and by all that is holy watch it in french with english subs else i will physically manifest in your house and punch you.
  • One Punch Man : ONE tries to mock shonen manga, does it too well
  • Shaman King : the french OP is in my head and I CANT GET IT OUT
  • Black Rock Shooter (OVA + series) : this times its girls fucking shit up, and theyre also crying. it looks amazing

SPORTS ANIME (i dont give a shit about sports but goddamn i love these):

  • Baby Steps : the most realistic and likeable sports anime ever. weak art but great story telling and pacing
  • Haikyuu!! : what even is volleyball. i care about these characters and the animation is fucking phenomenal. the soundtrack is so good. watch it
  • Ping Pong - The Animation : weird-ass art in the best way, great story & characters. cant fucking believe this was achieved on flash
  • Welcome To The Ballroom : n e c k s
  • Hajime No Ippo : punching people and your own FEELINGS
  • Yuri On Ice!!! : gay ice skating. everyone loves quadruples. very nice and sweet. you will care about dogs
  • Akagi: lets just pretend playing mah-jong while using your blood to bet is an actual sport. also known as ‘wow thats a peculiar art style - the anime’

OTHER SHIT I’M TOO LAZY TO CATEGORIZE (but watch them theyre good i promise):

  • Fume Wo Amu : autistic man discovers how to make dictionaries and friends. some sad happens
  • Shouwa Genroku Rakugo Shinjuu : like a greek tragedy, except sadder and directed by gods. incredible animation as well. gr8 storytelling
  • Doukyuusei : a short, sweet love story. the animation style is stunning i fucking love it with all my heart
  • Steins;Gate : time travel bullshit. great direction
  • Journey To Agartha : a movie i tried to get people to watch back when they didnt know who makoto shinkai was yet. pls watch its good
  • Usagi Drop : aka “dont read the manga - the anime”. the fluffiest piece of animation you will ever encounter. a dad dadding his life away
  • Psycho-Pass : great thriller/action show. makes you question morality
  • Uchuu Patrol Luluco : fuck you and your feelings im more important
  • Monster : naoki urasawa Does It Again™
  • Kiznaiver : a deconstruction of drama anime in general, with godlike animation and art. the OP makes me want to cry because its so good
  • Wandering Son : a touching anime about trans kids. read the manga
  • Akagi : just makin sure you watch that one. while youre ahead read the manga too
  • Nichijou : slice of life anime presented in the most hilarious way
  • Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica : magical girls but with a twist. dont fuckin trust that piece of shit plushie
  • Lupin III : arsène lupin except hes more of a piece of shit than usual
  • Parasyte : i am scarred for life by the things i have seen
  • Jojo’s Bizarre Adventures: whatever the fuck is going on here

thats it for now, i will probably update this in the future when i think of it. these are my opinions and my opinions only im not some kind of anime guru kthx

Negotiations

I walked into the room, avoiding direct eye contact with the alien waiting for me. Its huge eyes just looked like a jet black sclera set in a sack of vaguely damp, wrinkled gray leather. If eyes are a window into the soul, this creepy little guy would give satan a run for his money. They just put me on edge, somehow. I’d have to make eye contact anyway, but it could wait.

I strode up to the meeting table, pulled out the chair, and sat down. I shuffled around in my bag for a moment before pulling out a small piece of tech, which I set on the table in front of me.

“Before we begin, I want to be sure of a few things. This device you’ve provided us with, it is 100% effective at understanding and translating languages, correct?”

The alien across from me nodded. It’s a nice little allowance they’ve made for comfort, learning our body language, but its bulbous head threw the whole gesture off. It made me think of one of those old inflatable toys with a weight on the bottom, that would lean too far to the side before bouncing straight back up. Woobles or something. It didn’t really matter.

“Nearly. We occasionally find a race with one or two concepts that it has trouble with, but that’s easily smoothed over.”

I took a deep breath, and waited a moment to compose myself. This whole thing was going to be more trying than not interrupting old man Higgins up the street while he went on about whatever racist sentiment was in his head at the moment.

“One or two…okay. That’s odd.”

The alien blinked. Eyelids came in from not just the top and bottom, but also the sides. That’s just plain creepy. Reminds me of one of those really old movies they threw on the media blacklist pretty much as soon as first contact started. Something in black. Whatever it was, I remember seeing it as a kid, and that guy at the beginning had nothing on this alien’s eyes.

“Have you already found something it can’t translate?”

I nodded, then pulled out my communicator and scrolled through a few documents. I really needed to clean this thing out. Can’t believe I didn’t get around to it before coming to such an important meeting. Imagine the debacle that would result if I opened exactly the wrong thing. Never can know what that might be, honestly.

“Of a sort, yes. Mind humoring me for a few minutes?”

The alien steepled its hands together, and leaned forward. That’s just plain creepy. I wonder how they learned such context specific body language? Not that it really matters, I guess. Not my problem.

“Certainly. After all, it can take years to accept a race into the Federation.”

Nodding again, I pulled up a document on my communicator, then leaned back in my chair as I began. This was going to be more interesting than that time your classmate Jimmy found some old matches somewhere and almost burned the school down by mistake.

“Excellent. This shouldn’t take much time. I mentioned that we found some issues with your device. Allow me to demonstrate: Espionage.”

The little device on the table beeped, and a red light flashed.

“ERROR: NO ANALOGUE FOUND”

I sighed. That one had been an accident. We just had the thing sitting in a conference room while we discussed the implications of the visit when it came up. But, when something that simple for us to understand came up, we had to try for more.

“Reverse Engineering.”

Again, a beep and a flash of red.

“ERROR: NO ANALOGUE FOUND”

“Spycraft.”

And again with the beep. This was going to get irritating if I didn’t speed things up a bit. Too bad we hadn’t managed to find a mute option for that feature.

“ERROR: NO ANALOGUE FO-”

“Overwhelming Force”

“ERROR: NO-”

“Scorched Earth”

“ER-”

“Kamikaze”

“E-”

Blitzkrieg, Stealth, Mutually Assured Destruction, Acceptable Losses, Pyrrhic Victory, Guerilla Warfare, Encirclement, Entrenchment, Siege.”

The device gave off a series of distressed beeps, punctuated by rapid blinking of the little red light. I almost felt sorry for it. Almost.

“TOO MANY ERRORS DETECTED. REBOOTING. RUNNING SELF DIAGNOSTIC. NO DISCREPANCIES FOUND,”

I paused, and glanced across the table at the alien before looking back down at the translator. This was going to hit it harder than a washed up holovid actor with no auditions and less money hits rock bottom.

“Xenocide”

The chair across from me clattered to the ground as the alien practically fell out of its seat. I don’t blame the poor thing. Of all the aggressive, militaristic words we tried, that was one of the ones we least expected to translate. I mean, really. Who has a word for the intentional extermination of an entire sapient species when they don’t even understand fundamental hostile international mechanics like spying?

“Why do you have a word for…what was all that just now?”

I chuckled a bit while motioning for the alien to sit back down. His reaction had been pretty good, perfectly suitable for one of those hammed-up old dramas where the hero realizes they’ve been working with the villain all along.

“We were confused about that too. So we took a look at the information you sent as part of first contact with us. We noticed something interesting. Every single race in your Federation is carnivorous. Why is that?”

The alien seemed smaller somehow as it settled back into a seat. It looked kind of like a balloon slowly losing air, if that balloon was made of moldering gray leather with eyes that made your spinal column decide it wanted a holiday in Fiji.

“First contact has always been made after sapient races make it to multiple worlds. We’ve never found a sapient herbivorous race which failed to destroy themselves in resource wars and aggressive action. We’ve never found herbivores capable of surviving long enough to leave their own world.”

I leaned forward in the chair and smiled while finally making direct eye contact with the alien. I think the poor thing shivered when I did that. Not that I blame it. Imagine your reaction when you start to put the pieces together and realize that your friendly, upstanding next door neighbor might be the world’s most wanted criminal.

“And the races you have found, while commonly using threat displays, do not waste resources on wars they cannot easily win, correct?”

The alien nodded as it slouched a bit in its chair. It looked kind of like it was trying to hide. Who wouldn’t want to hide from the monsters in their closet?

“Wasted resources means decreased likelihood of survival.”

I shrugged. That was true enough, though rather coldly logical. Dispassionate logic like that has never been our strong suit. Then again, that’s why I’m in this situation in the first place, so it evens out.

“And yet herbivores constantly waste resources on aggression, on movement, on having more young than will possibly survive.”

The alien was staring at me. I’m not sure when the last time it blinked was. I wonder if those eyes need some kind of lubrication to keep from drying out. Probably, they looked a bit less creepy than they should’ve. Looked like they were losing their shine.

“And they die for it. That’s exactly why we’ve never encountered spacefaring herbivores. Their inherent aggression is their own demise.”

I held eye contact. I’d almost swear the alien was a weird statue right now. Don’t know who would commission a statue made of old greasy leather, but I’m sure there’s someone with too much money and too little sense who would give it a shot.

“Indeed. Now, back to the subject at hand. I’ll ask you before we continue: what can you offer humans for joining your Federation?”

The alien sputtered as it started moving again. I’d swear it looked offended. Maybe it doesn’t see where this is going. Not that it really matters, I guess. I mean, it probably matters about as much as posting a formal complaint to a new corporate policy, which is to say not at all.

“We’ve already sent the offer. You’ve seen that, I’m sure.”

I nodded, and began to tap out a staccato rhythm on the table with my fingers. I never could remember where I learned this stupid tune. I’ve known it as long as I can remember, and it just moves into my head on occasion and sticks around like that one couchsurfing friend who doesn’t understand the idea of wearing out their welcome.

“And I’m asking, what else do you have to offer?”

The alien just shook its head again, staring at the device. I wonder if it thought we might’ve tampered with it. As if we knew how. That little thing is way beyond our current abilities. We had some scientists pry it open and look inside, just to be sure.

“Nothing. I’m not sure why you’re-”

I raised my hand, cutting him off. Huh. Not sure why that worked. Did they learn that much of our body language? That’s still really creepy, if it’s the case. Or, maybe I just have it on edge. I dunno. I guess it doesn’t matter.

“May I have permission to connect my datapad with my ship’s computers?”

The alien glanced away from me for a moment. I assume it was checking in with superiors somehow. Maybe it was psychic, to an extent. Or maybe they just had an implant of some sort. We’ll find out eventually, I’m sure.

“Yes, if you like.”

I sighed. I guess that makes things easier for us. I don’t think anyone was going to like what I was about to do. This whole thing felt kind of like one of those holovids of an accident, where you know what’s coming and don’t want to keep going, but for some reason you just can’t seem to stop and pull yourself away.

“Computer, show video: Hiroshima”

A screen appeared in the air above my datapad. It started playing back an old, grainy video. Shaky, taken by hand in an aircraft in a firefight. Below, you can barely see a city being blotted out by a massive explosion. A cloud of smoke, fire and debris was rapidly climbing into the sky, billowing, growing, blooming into an eerie and easily recognized mushroom cloud.

“That’s…you’re using weapons of that scale on a population center? How recent was this?”

I shrugged, and closed the video. The screen on my datapad went back to the document I had up earlier. Gotta love how well they managed to predict this whole thing. I made a mental note to recommend a raise for whoever set up that document for me.

“Three centuries ago. Prior to our invention of spaceflight. Part of a much larger conflict. This is a relatively minor example of “overwhelming force”“

“ERROR: NO A-”

“Shut it. Computer, show infosheet: Battle of Stalingrad.”

A series of graphs and diagrams appeared above my datapad. They showed resources, time, maps, battle plans, and death tolls. Images were interspersed throughout, as were annotations on the tactical value of this, the emotional value of that. Prominent among them was a single apartment building, including notes on sniping from the roof and support via tunnels.

“That…what purpose would that…why w-”

Again, I raised my hand to cut him off, before closing the infosheet. Maybe it was both. Nah, couldn’t be. Only way it was both having this guy on edge and our body language is if it somehow had our body language built in. Unsettling thought, but not exactly likely.

“Because Stalingrad was an advantageous location and the people who died there were considered ‘Acceptable losses’“

“ERRO-”

“Computer, show gallery: General Sherman’s March to the Sea.”

A multitude of images appeared over the datapad. Rail lines and roads intentionally broken and destroyed. Farms and fields scoured clean and left to fallow. Buildings and towns razed to the ground. A broken people left to mourn and starve.

“So much waste…that can’t be intentional, can it?”

I glanced at the images, the wanton destruction that campaign caused, and the very orders that caused it. That kind of thing may be considered morally reprehensible now, even a war crime, but it wasn’t always. At the time, the strategy was extolled as one of the reasons the war ended the way it did.

“It was intentional.”

The alien stared at me, its reflective black eyes bigger than I’d ever seen them before. Creepy as all hell, that’s for sure. I’d rather not deal with these kinds of meetings in the future. Maybe after this I could negotiate for some kind of retirement.

“But…why?”

I tapped my datapad and closed the gallery, then leaned back and tossed my feet on the table. May as well relax, I already knew how this was going to end.

“Because it rendered the enemy unable to use resources Sherman couldn’t keep. Computer, assemble and show video grouping: RTS Games”

A large grid of videos came up, showing a huge range of scenes. Largely battle, the settings varied from open space to deep ocean, from early history to the far “future.” Even battles across space and time could be seen.

“The translator can’t have gotten that right. Those are military tactical simulations. Higher level than anything I’ve ever seen or heard of.”

I laughed as I closed out all of the videos and turned back to the alien. Creepy and unsettling as it might be, I’m pretty sure I was terrifying the poor thing. Not that I really felt sorry for it. Not at all.

“No. They aren’t. Those are games. Toys. For. Fun. And they’re a couple hundred years out of date. From what I’ve seen, nearly every human capable of coherent speech is capable of tactically overwhelming your Federation. And since we’re already here, in space, it’s too late for you to say no. So, I’ll ask again:

What do you have to offer us?”

Bruise [ II ]

Genre [Rating] : Angst [M]

Length: 10.3k

Pairing: Chanyeol x Reader

Summary: He wasn’t yours, and you weren’t his, but that couldn’t stop your heart from believing otherwise.

Bruise Masterlist

Originally posted by pcycho61

The cool air whipping at your skin made a shiver spread along your spine, hands rubbing at your biceps as your teeth chattered behind your pressed together lips. Loud laughter and screams filled the air, the night lit up by warm orange hues of carnival rides and haunted houses. Your feet felt stiff, trapped in a pair of uncomfortable sneakers you regretted wearing, eyes glued to the back of Minseok’s head as he told your friends something apparently hilarious. It was far too cold out to be stuck in a stupid line for a stupid haunted house in a tank top and torn up skinny jeans. You were too annoyed to continue being stuck in front of Chanyeol and Sehun as they flirted with a group of girls behind you, Chanyeol’s cologne wafting to your nose whenever he moved his arms about.

Keep reading

Dress Code (m)

Originally posted by gotjhope

➾ reader x CEO!jimin

➾ word count: 6.3k words

➾ warnings: incredibly filthy smut with no plot at all | cumplay | dirty talk | tit fucking | slight demeaning names/ name calling | face fucking | oral sex | unprotected sex

➾ summary: ceo!jimin takes it upon himself to discipline you when your attire doesn’t exactly adhere to HR regulations

➾ a/n: okay look this is just my excuse to write a ceo!jimin smut… i just felt like i owed him big time after what i did to him in instant gratification :”) i speed wrote this in a day and didn’t proofread whatsoever rip…


The clattering sounds of typing, clicking and pages flipping lull you into a state of lethargy as your eyes flutter half-shut in your cubicle. Having graduated as an arts major two years ago, you’d never imagine being holed up with a mundane 9-5 office job that had almost nothing to do with your major. But bills needed to be paid and rent had to come from somewhere, so you find yourself trudging to work soulessly every morning, day in day out.

“Hey, are you almost done with those files I gave you this morning?” The voice of your co-worker Mingyu in the next cubicle jolts you into awareness immediately.

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Your first date with Peter Parker would include..

- A LOT of not knowing what to do

- but going with the flow

- the angel asked you out in such a cute way

- ‘hEeeEy (y/n) i think you’re REALLY COOL wannagoeatwithme

- well he almost choked

- but that’s not the point

- anyways

- his palms sweating when he picks you up even though you only live two floors above him

- ‘okay peter you can do this’ 

- you open the door

- ‘HI(Y/N)YOULOOKREALLYNICETONIGHTIMPETER’

- asking may for advice

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Landlord is jealous of my income, raises my rent $500. I screw him years later for $20k.

All names have been changed. Long story:

In the late ‘90s wife and I were just married, just getting started, and we decided to DINK (“double income, no kids”) it for a few years to save up for a down payment on a house.

The dotcom bubble was still rising and I was a newly minted software developer. I had an entry-level job for a while and then got recruited to a new city and a new job that paid 3x what I was making before. It was an offer too good to pass up. I ran the numbers and it was a no-brainer: by living frugally and saving my entire salary, living off just her income, we would easily have enough in a year to put 20% down payment on a new house.

We rented an apartment in the new city that was listed for $950/mo. The landlord was a real estate agent who owned a two-bedroom condo as an investment property. Let’s call him “Hank Wazowski”. Hank was a thin, gray, no-nonsense guy. He was pleasant enough, but perfunctory, dry, and had no sense of humor. He made a point of explaining that under no circumstances was he responsible for maintaining the garbage disposal and that it was NOT included in the rental agreement and he would not be responsible for fixing it were it to break. Um, ok.

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Polydads

Also on ao3

Based on a post that @catsforartists made!

—–

When Amanda woke up, she decided to crawl out of bed to get a bowl of cereal. And eat it on the couch, of course.

“Ain’t nothing beat couch cereal.” She declared to the empty room and dug into her delicious and dangerously sugary cereal.

Almost immediately after taking a bite out of her cereal, she heard footsteps coming from her dad’s room, but, when she glanced up, she saw Damien walking by her.

“Good morning, Amanda dear.” Damien greeted.

“Mornin.” Amanda responded. She KNEW it. Her dad and Damien had been getting pretty close, so it wasn’t a completely wild assumption that they would start dating. And, of course, the footsteps she heard must be…

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Five Times Tony Stark Was a Good Dad (And One Time He Wasn’t)

So, I’m obsessed with the whole idea that Peter is Tony’s unofficial son and it’s only supported by Tony’s appearance in Spider-Man Homecoming, so I came up with this series, which is in the works and also posted on my AO3 account. If you like it or have any suggestions as to where I should take this, please don’t hesitate to let me know! Also, forgive any spelling errors or mistakes, I finished this at three in the morning one night and I was too lazy to go back and fix them. Enjoy!

Read Part 2 here

~~~~~~

Tony swore when he was twelve years old that he would never be a father. He remembered that moment clearly, like it had just happened a day ago, not well over thirty years ago. He was in his room, his father still screaming in a drunken rage at his mother over something Tony did, his anger and disappointment following Tony down the hallway of their New York penthouse apartment. He remembered sitting on the cold tile floor of his room, head rest against the heavy wooden door that was doing nothing to muffle his father’s harsh words.

His father was angry, Tony had gotten kicked out of his third private school on the East Coast, the letter expulsion still clutched in his father’s harsh grasp. He wasn’t sure if he had ever seen his father this furious before and Tony knew that the only thing that saved him from taking a glass full of scotch to the face was his mother’s presence in the room. Maria Stark might’ve been docile about a lot of things, but Howard taking his rage out on Tony physically, that would never fly in this house hold.

Tears of anger and embarrassment welled in Tony’s eyes and he wiped them away furiously, refusing to waste anymore energy on that man that he was forced to acknowledge as his father. No matter what Tony did, it was never enough to please Howard Stark. He made his first prototype of an arch reactor at the age of six, Howard wanted it by age five. Tony skipped three grades, Howard wanted him to skip four. Tony, despite his age, was offered a spot at MIT and if Howard had it his way? He would’ve been there a year ago. No matter how much Tony achieved, how many goals he surpassed, he always came up short in Howard’s eyes. Being the constant source of Howard’s disappointment and ire made Tony wonder if he would ever succeed in his father’s eyes, if his dad would ever clap him on the back and say “I’m proud of you, son.”

He wondered, some nights, when he’d lie awake in his too big bed in his too big room in his too big house, if his father had ever wanted children, had wanted Tony.

The thought crossed his mid countless of times, until it latched onto his cerebral cortex and sat there, like the worst form of cancer that had no possible cure.

And while Tony sat there, head resting tiredly against the warm wood, Howard’s voice still echoing down the long hallway, that cancer spread until it proved fatal.

He never wanted his children to feel like this.

Unwanted

Worthless

A complete and utter failure.

Tony was self-aware enough to know that the apple didn’t fall far from the tree, that human nature was a pattern and patterns were destined to repeat themselves, without fail. Anger and rage and disappointment were the only form of affection Tony was used to getting to his father. His father was a cold man, always keeping Tony at a distance that no matter how hard he tried, Tony could never quite breach.

And Tony knew, no matter how hard he tried, he would always end up like his father.

~~~~~~~

Peter Parker came into his life unexpectedly and despite popular opinion, unplanned. He’d been keep tabs on the Spider-Kid since the kid popped up on his radar a few months ago, clad in that god awful homemade leotard/hoodie contraption and flying around Queens on his webs with all the grace of a child learning to walk for the first time. Tony never planned to actually meet the kid behind the mask or reaching out to the flying kid in his homemade costume, but when the Avengers disbanded and the only family Tony had ever known was decreasing in numbers, he needed back up.

Looking back, his intentions were purely selfish and it shamed him to admit, when he dropped the kid back off in his sketchy neighborhood in Queens with the new suit he’d made him, he never had any intention of keeping in contact with the kid.

To absolve himself from the guilt, he appointed Happy as his chaperone and threw himself into creating new legs for Rhodey, another way to attempting to soothe ache of guilt that had settled along with the shrapnel, in his battered heart.

He underestimated Peter, who was pushy and persistent and finally, after three months, Happy threw his phone at Tony and told him to call the kid. That night, Tony, with a glass of scotch in hand, filtered through the hundreds of voicemails Peter had left Happy—anecdotes of his daily patrols, everything from helping old ladies cross the street, stopping bike thieves to getting cats out of trees. Each story was told with excruciating detail, in that excited ramble the kid got whenever he was particularly enthused about something and warmth settled around Tony’s heart, fond amusement making his lips curl into his first genuine smile in months.

It took Tony another week to reach out to the kid, but he did and that’s how he found himself, in one of his more flashier cars, sitting outside of Peter’s school. He ignored the gawking, the stunned stares and the whispers of the students filtering out of the school, his eyes scanning the crowd before they landed on a familiar head of messy hair.

Peter was talking excitedly to the chubby, dark haired Asian kid by his side, who was nodding along to everything Peter said with a look of pure wonder on his face and Tony wondered briefly if his little friend knew that his BFF moonlighted as a super-hero in spandex at night.

Another kid appeared by Peter’s side and Tony watched as Peter visibly tensed and tried to skirt around the kid, but the kid threw a hand out and stopped Peter in his tracks.

The cocky grin that appeared on the kid’s face was all too familiar to Tony and before he could even second guess himself, he was out of his car and walking towards the three boys, ignoring the murmurs coming from the crowd.

“—when are you gonna stop lying about your internship with Tony Stark, Penis Parker? There’s no way someone like Tony Stark would ever take on a charity case like you—“

Peter looked up when he heard the murmuring crowd fall to a hush and his gaze landed on Tony. The amount of surprise in the kid’s features made Tony’s gut clench that in no way had to do with the greasy cheeseburger he ate on the way over here.

“M-Mr. Stark, what, uh, what are you doing here?” Peter stammered, flicking his gaze back to would be bully in front of him.

“Yeah, Parker, like I’m gonna fall for that—

“Is there a problem here, gentlemen?” Tony interrupted, smirking in satisfaction when the kid that was giving Peter a hard time, froze, turning his disbelieving eyes on to Tony.

“Y-You-You’re Tony Stark.” He said faintly, his voice shaking.

Tony smirked, “Astute observation and you are?”

The kid gulped, his adams apple bobbing harshly, “F-Flash Thompson.”

“Makes sense,” Tony said with a nod of his head, looking the kid up and down, “I’d bully someone too, if my parents named me after the lamest superhero to ever grace the pages of a comic book, overcompensation and all that,” Tony said thoughtfully, “especially with your perceived fixation on the male genitalia. Tell me, did it take you a while to come up with something that juvenile or did you have someone equally as childish think it up for you? Because I would think someone with—and I’m assuming here, so correct me if my deductive reasoning skills are off—a high level of intelligence would come up with something a little bit more creative than ‘Penis Parker’.”

By the time Tony was done, the crowd around him was snickering and the kid in front of him looked like he wanted nothing more than the ground to open up and swallow him whole, if such things were possible.

Tony smiled, but there was nothing nice about, “Now, if I ever catch wind of you so much as looking in Peter’s direction again and trust me, kid, I’ve got my ways, I have no issue siccing my AI on all your school records and wreaking havoc on your future plans for any Ivy League schools, you reading me kid?”

Flash nodded so vigorously he resembled a bobble head, “Y-Yes, Sir.”

Tony smiled, this one much more kind than the last, “Good, I’m glad we could reach an understanding, now running along so I can talk to my intern here without your sorry excuse for cologne clouding my senses, seriously kid less is more.”

Flash tucked his proverbial tail between his legs and pushed through the crowd of people that were now openly laughing, losing interest in Tony in favor of chasing after Flash to mock him.

Tony shouldn’t feel as proud as he did, but he knew what it was like to be bullied and he’d be damned if his kid—ahem, someone like Peter had to deal with someone as childish as Flash Thompson every day and it was within his power to do something about it. Like kid didn’t already have enough to deal with as it was.

He turned back to see a dumbfounded Peter and his equally as flabbergasted friend.

“That was—” Peter began, but seemed to be at a loss for words, shaking his head in disbelief.

His friend, however, didn’t seem to have that particular problem.

“—AWESOME!” His friend said excitedly, “oh man did you see Flash’s face? Dude, this is greatest thing to ever happen to me. Tony Stark just verbally assaulted Flash, Jesus dude, how is this your life? If you ever want to trade, even if it’s just for a day, I’m totally down—“

Ned.” Peter muttered, elbowing him roughly, giving a rough jerk of his head in Tony’s direction. He flicked his apologetic gaze over to Tony, who simply rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t deny the amused smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

Ned followed his gaze and flushed, “Right, sorry.”

Peter closed his eyes for a moment and Tony could see the kid physically trying to fight off his embarrassment and couldn’t help but chuckle.

Peter’s eyes snapped open at the sound and the surprise and confusion from earlier was back, “Mr. Stark, what are you doing here? At my school? Is everything okay? Is there a—“ Peter glanced around in a sad attempt at nonchalance and lowered his voice to an equally as sad attempt at a whisper, “—mission?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows in a manner that was making Tony wonder if the kid had a weird twitch he’d never noticed before.

Tony glanced over at Ned quickly, going back to his original curiosity of how much the kid actually knew about his arachnid friend here, but Ned seemed to catch on to Tony’s unasked question.

“Don’t worry Mr. Stark, sir, I’m Peter’s Guy In The Chair.” Ned answered helpfully, giving him a bright smile.

Tony glanced back over at Peter with a raised eyebrow, who simply muttered “dude” in an exasperated tone, shaking his head before returning his attention to Tony, “Ned knows.”

“Oh, well, in that case, no, there is no…mission,” Tony said in a mock whisper, making Peter flush, “I’m working on a new Iron Man suit and I need to pick your brain for some ideas on upgrades, figured I’d swing by and pick you up from school today.”

Peter’s eyes widened and Ned seemed torn between fainting or peeing himself from excitement.

“You get to touch the Iron Man suit?!” He squeaked, turning his wide-eyed gaze over to Peter, who only gave Ned a look, who bit his lip sheepishly, but looked like he was ready to explode from the level of his enthusiasm.

Peter ignored him, “I was supposed to help Ned finish the lego Death Star today, we were supposed to do it yesterday, but I uh, kinda got caught up on patrol.” Peter gave Tony a guilty shrug of his shoulders.

“So let me get this straight,” Tony said slowly, “you’re turning down quality time in my personal lab to build a lego Death Star with Ned over here?”

Peter’s eyes had lit up at the mentions of Tony’s lab, but with quick glance at a wide eyed Ned, who seemed to be stuck on the fact that Tony Stark said his name, his excitement dimmed. But Peter was loyal, almost to a fault, and nodded resolutely.

Tony, seemingly at a loss for words, just stood there, shellshocked at being told no, by a fifteen year old kid at that. A small part of Tony, the one that was actually looking forward to hanging out with the kid, was slightly hurt at the rejection.

Ned, who’d been watching the entire scene with wide eyes, was more observant than he looked and seemed to sense Peter’s indecision and Tony’s disappointment, because he gave his friend a bright smile, “Dude, we can finish the Death Star anytime and besides, my mom wanted me home tonight to help her with something, so I’m booked, raincheck?” He offered.

Peter glanced at Ned then at Tony and then back to Ned, “Um, sure Ned, no problem.”

Ned gave him a smile and then turning his attention back to Tony, his friendly smiled turned a bit more to the manic grin that most people wore in Tony’s presence, “It was really nice to meet you Mr. Stark.”

He offered Peter a fist bump, who returned it, before he started walking down the side walk, towards, what Tony assumed, was home.

Turning his attention back to the kid, he gave him a smile, “Good good, now we should probably be on our way if we want to avoid traffic. Now, as far as suit upgrades go, I was thinking of up-ing the suit’s repulsers a bit—hey, kid, you coming?” Tony asked from his position on the driver’s side, raising an eyebrow at Peter, who was still standing on the side walk. Tony followed his gaze and saw Ned still making his way down the sidewalk and chancing a glance back at Peter, who was still watching him with big, guilty eyes, he sighed.

The things I do for you, kid, Tony thought to himself.

“Hey, Ned,” Tony shouted, making the kid pause and turn around, looking to Peter, who was watching Tony with the beginnings of a smile, then back to Tony curiously, “would you like to join us? There’s plenty of room in the lab for three people.”

Even from a few yards away, Tony could see the kid’s eyes widen in surprise before he hustled his way back to an equally excited Peter, who shot him a grateful look.

“Thank you, Mr. Stark.” He said quietly, giving him a bright smile.

And Tony couldn’t help but smile back, “You’re welcome, kiddo,” eyeing a panting Ned warily, “make sure he doesn’t do anything…weird, okay? I don’t mind opening my lab to him but there was something in his eyes when I was talking about the Iron Man suit that made me decidedly uncomfortable.”

Peter gave a breathy laugh, “Don’t worry, Mr. Stark, Ned’s cool.”

Ned, who had come to a slightly sweaty stop in from them, looked up at Tony with wide eyes, “Can I try on the Iron Man helmet?”

“Dude.”

~~~~~~~~~

Tony spent the majority of their time in lab just watching Peter and Ned run around like kids in a candy store—picking things up, playing with the robots—DUM-E taking a special liking to Peter, who, Tony was pleased to see, treated him like a human, thanking him when he brought them water from the stocked fridge and smiling when DUM-E beeped happily in return—and played with all the gadgets laying around.

Tony, albeit wearily, let them try on one of the Iron Man helmets from one of his earlier models and explained to them how the suit worked, both of them hanging on to his every word. He showed them the blue prints for his newest model, listening to their suggestions and even writing a few them down to look into later.

Ned, Tony found out, was rather intelligent with computers. He gave him one of his old security systems and watched with genuine interest as the kid hacked into the the files with ease and recoded the entire system in a matter of minutes.

When Tony looked it over, he let out a grunt of an approval, “Nice work, kid.”

Ned all but fainted at Tony’s praise.

The hours slipped by and F.R.I.D.A.Y. being the helpful AI that she is, had ordered pizzas without Tony even having to ask and had them sent to the kitchen, alerting them when they had arrived. Tony led them up to the kitchen, watching with thinly veiled amusement as they both took in every new surrounding with the same amount of interest they had shown in the lab.

Tony continued to observe them as they tore into the pizza like they hadn’t eaten in days and taking a quick glance at the clock, he realized with a flash of guilt, that they had been down in the lab for over four hours and the last time they had probably eaten something would’ve been well over seven or eight hours ago.

It was nice, Tony deiced, listening to their mindless chatter and what was especially nice, was seeing how at ease Peter was with his friend, looking like a true fifteen year old with his friend over to his house on a school night, like he didn’t have super powers, like he didn’t dress up in tight spandex and web his way through Queens and fight crime at night while trying to balance a normal life.

The thought nagged at Tony for the rest of dinner and as he rode silently with them in the backseat while Happy drove them all to Ned’s apartment first, who still looked like he couldn’t believe today was real, thanking Tony breathlessly for the best day of his life and telling Peter he’d see him tomorrow at school.

Peter watched his friend with a small, amused smile and when they got to Peter’s apartment building, Tony glanced over at the kid, the smile still had yet to leave his face.

“Alright kid, this is your stop,” Tony said, making a move to undo his seatbelt, but the kid’s hesitant voice made him pause.

“Mr. Stark?” Peter said softly, clearing his throat, “I uh, just wanted to thank you, you know for well, everything,” the kid breathed, smiling up at him so sincerely that it made Tony’s chest ache in the best sort of way, “today was amazing and I really appreciate you inviting Ned along with us, he really looks up to you, you know? And I haven’t really been able to spend much time with him since, y’know, the whole Spider-Man thing.”

The kid paused before continuing on in a softer voice, “And about Flash, I really, really don’t know how to thank you for that,” he rubbed the back of his neck, clearly embarrassed, “it’s kind of funny, in a way, I’m a sort of super-hero and I can’t even stand up to a bully—“

Tony’s heart squeezed painfully in his chest at the kid’s self-deprecation, “Look, kid, I’m no stranger to bullies,” he began, sighing heavily, “I had my fair share of them when I was in school and even in college. I learned that while you may no be able to physically fight someone, you can always fight them with words and sometimes, words can hurt more than your fists. All I did was give that Flash kid a taste of his own medicine and hopefully, got him off your case.”

Peter was silent for a moment, considering Tony’s words before giving him another appreciative smile, “I don’t think Flash will be messing with me anytime soon, but still, thank you,” Peter’s smile turned shy, “you’re the first adult, other than May, to stand up for me and I really appreciate it, so thank you, Mr. Stark.”

“Call me Tony,” Tony offered after a beat of silence, unsure of how to respond to such a statement.

Whatever he was trying to say, the kid got, because he smiled brightly and Tony, suddenly feeling awkward at the unusual sentimental moment, busied himself with unbuckling his seatbelt, ignoring the warmth in his chest.

He reached around the kid to open the door for him and Peter, rather than getting out, just like last time, he reached up and wrapped his arms around Tony, thinking he was hugging him

“This um, wasn’t a hug,” Tony began awkwardly, “I’m just getting the door for you.”

However, before the kid could pull away, Tony wrapped his arms around him and gave him a quick, but firm squeeze.

Peter gave him another smile before wishing Tony and Happy a goodnight,  getting out of the car and making his way up towards his apartment. Tony debated on his next move, mulling it over quickly and before the kid could get too far, he found himself making a snap decision and rolling down he window.

“Hey, Underoos,” Tony started, slightly unsure when the kid turned around and looked at Tony with hopeful eyes.

“Same time, same place tomorrow?” He said after a moment of silence, the kid’s answering grin melting away any self doubt before it could begin.

“Sure Mr.Stark—Tony,” Peter stuttered excitedly, “sounds great!”

Tony watched the kid go with a satisfied smiled, so caught up in his happy little pseudo-family moment that he almost didn’t hear his phone ring.

Not even bothering to glance at the caller I.D., he answered it with a smooth, “Stark.”

“Tony?! What the hell we’re you thinking going to a school and threatening a minor, A MINOR—“

Shit.

~~~~~

Should I continue? Please let me know :)

Possible-Future-Girlfriend

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky claims you can’t flirt for shit, you prove him wrong

Word Count: 2164

Warnings: pure fluff

Author’s Note: this is one of the first fluff i’ve written, i hope you enjoy (re)reading it :)

Masterlist Here

Sometimes you never really understood James Buchanan Barnes.

What is going on inside that pretty little head of his? What keeps him up all night sometimes. He’s assured you that it’s not the nightmares anymore. Those are the things he left in the past, along with all the terrible memories. But let’s not get drifted off to the apprehensive shit here. You have much important things to concentrate on.

Bucky Barnes is much happier now. He jokes around, flirts with girls at clubs or parties or any other place. He loves the cinema, especially the TV shows - so much that he binge watches them whenever Bucky and you are hanging out at your apartment.

He’s catching up on the new technology, too. You and Steve bought him a new phone for his birthday this year and boy, he cannot stop clicking pictures on it. And you know snooping is wrong, but most of the pictures on his camera roll are of Steve, the New York City skyline and you. You were surprised at first, but this man practically spends every free second of his time with you, so that was enough of an answer. Plus, you’d be lying to yourself and the rest the world if you’d say that your phone gallery isn’t stacked with pictures of Bucky.

Keep reading

summersaltturn  asked:

"Have anyone told you you have the most intimidating nostrils I've ever seen?"

“Yeah, I won an award, junior year,” Derek answers, frowning at his new IKEA (bought and built, all in a soft Henley sweater; Stiles knows, he supervised) book-shelf, like he hasn’t just finished a seven hundred page tome on Egyptian artefacts. A seven hundred page tome on Egyptian artefacts alone.

Derek Hale: epic nerd and assembler of easy-to-build IKEA products. Of course, Stiles thinks, cursing his stupid Professor and DIY kinks. Why not? The worst part is, he doesn’t even think those kinks are sexual. It’s just….a thing. That he has. A Derek thing. The Butterflies That Live In His Stomach were trying so desperately to move on with their lives, too. They’d shopped around. Hired a real-estate agent. They were ready, goddammit!  

Derek settles on a book - Stiles is pretty sure it also has the word ‘artefacts’ in the title - and sighs, all feigned nostalgia, and glances over his shoulder. “It was a golden nose, too. Across the bottom it said,” he pauses, grinning, “Stiles Stilinski needs to get a life.”

Stiles opens his mouth, clutches his chest, because rude much? Is it his fault Derek’s nostrils belong in some kind of anatomy museum? Is it his fault his Saturday nights are spent playing video games in his underwear, when his week days are spent chasing down monsters and researching things like how Scott and Erica managed to contract chicken pox when stabbing them does, like, nothing? (Except get Erica excited because she’s a beautiful, terrifying weirdo.) The moment he tries to tell Derek this, however, a copy of - is that Pride and Prejudice? - is thrown at his head. 

Stiles doesn’t know if he’s more offended when Derek rolls his eyes when it misses him, or the concerned look that crosses his face when the book sails past him and lands in an empty pizza box, like Derek is worried if it’s okay or not. 

And to think, Stiles was going to screw up his courage and finally invite Derek to see a movie this weekend. In an actual theatre. Where people go to be normal. Well, the laugh is on Derek because Stiles is going to buy the big popcorn and he’s going to enjoy it all on his own. 

Yeah, that’ll show him. 

~

“Has anyone ever told you your eyebrows could star in a disturbing kid’s movie about caterpillars?” 

Stiles is drunk. No, he’s wasted. Hammered. Loaded. Completely and utterly shit faced. Which is probably why instead of ending up on his ass on the floor, Derek just pinches the bridge of his nose, tips his head against the back of the couch and says, “what.” Not even a hint of inflection.

This dude, Stiles thinks, and then laughs because, ohmygod, Derek is this dude now. Not that dude or whoa, what are you doing crawling through my window, dude? but this dude. And that’s kind of beautifully heart warming, in its own way. 

Really, Stiles should write into Hallmark. It could be a trilogy. A Gay Trilogy ™. Bisexuals on ice. Except, without the ice because Stiles doesn’t know how to skate. Can Derek skate? Stiles totally bets Derek can skate.   

Speaking of Derek, he’s got this little crinkle on his forehead now, right between his eyebrows, and man, they really are very nice eyebrows. Animated but nice. A little dramatic but nice. Murderous but nice.

“What,” Derek says again, looking more confused than annoyed by the second. Stiles really wants to kiss him.

Instead, he stares. Stares and stares and stares.

Shit.

Slapping a hand over his mouth, he begins laughing uncontrollably and before he knows it, he’s clutching his sides and has his face pressed against Derek’s chest, because the hilarity is killing him. 

Because this is them now. Drinking peach-snaps at Derek’s loft, on a couch filled with throw pillows. Throw pillows. One is even soft and pink and frilly and another has a picture of the pack on it. Granted, no one is looking at the camera but Derek, Boyd and Kira and Derek is not so much looking at the camera as yelling at Stiles (holding the camera) for eating his secret stash of cookies, but it’s nice. It’s a nice picture. There is a plain black pillow too, of course. Somewhere. Stiles might be sitting on it, actually. He figures one can only expect so much when it comes to sour-wolves but Erica glued little cat ears on it last week and Derek said nothing. Fuck, he’d even smiled.

It says a lot about what a secret softie Derek is when it comes to vulnerable, drunk-ass people, because he doesn’t push Stiles away; just lets him laugh and laugh until he passes out, drooling on his chest. 

When Stiles wakes up, Derek’s sweater is pretty soaked through but he hasn’t moved an inch. He does, however, tell Stiles he snores like a deranged goose and that he owes him a pastry later.

He doesn’t even ask for a specific kind, Stiles chastises in his head, falling back to sleep. He’s in love with a pastry idiot. 

~

“Do you know when you smile, you brighten up the whole damn room?”

The question clearly catches Derek off guard because he falls head first…into a duck pond. 

Stiles’ first reaction is to jump in after him - he hates to admit it, but he gets a little nervous around water when Derek is with him; there have been several incidents where he’s unconsciously grabbed Derek’s hand in order to drag him away from pools and, one time, a very large puddle - but when Derek emerges, wearing his someone is about to die face, Stiles can’t be held accountable for the way he falls to the ground because, yup, that’s a tiny, outraged duckling perched on top of Derek’s head.   

“Oh my god,” he yells, rolling onto his back and kicking his legs in the air. He feels like a kid, grabbing his stomach, water practically pouring from his eyes. This was, quite possibly, the best day of his life.

Normally, Derek would be yelling threats - several, in fact, some in Spanish because he’s a show off - but he just stands there….in the middle of a fucking pond. The duckling is still sitting on his head, like he or she plans to set up home there and it’s so adorable Stiles thinks he actually coos out loud.

Still, Derek still doesn’t say anything. Not even when Stiles coos again, very, very deliberately. (And Scott said his middle name could never be Danger, pffft.) Stiles can’t actually guess what Derek is going to do but he doesn’t care. He looks a strange cross between wanting to murder someone - namely, Stiles - and a little kid who was told they couldn’t get a puppy only to get one on Christmas day anyway. 

Mostly, he just looks lost. And wet. Very, very wet. Somewhere out there, someone is playing It’s Raining Men and Stiles wants nothing more than to share this glorious moment with them. He’s just in the process of taking out his phone to at least snap a photo to send to the pack when - 

“Did you mean it?” Derek asks, and man, those water droplets just keep on running, don’t they. 

Stiles grins. “Did I mean for you to fall into a pond and adopt a new feathered friend? No but I think we can all agree-” 

Stiles.” 

Derek growls and it would be effective - at least in getting Stiles to help him out of the pond - if it wasn’t for the fact his ears were turning a little pink. A lot pink, actually and - 

Oh.

Sitting up, Stiles drags his butt over to the edge of the pond.

“Yeah,” he says. “I meant it. I mean, smiles can’t literally light up rooms, I know that, but when you smile it’s like…” He sighs and flaps his arms, suddenly nervous, hitting Derek in the process. The duckling practically glares at him and Stiles briefly wonders if he has competition here. 

Right. Better make this good then. He clears his throat. 

“It’s like, everything just makes sense for a little bit, you know? I look at you and it’s not that smiling is rare for you, at least not anymore, but it’s still pretty thrilling to see it and when you do I’m like, that’s some quality shit right there but then I get confused because it’s like, do I wanna punch it? Kiss it? Pet it? Who knows. Usually it depends on what you’re wearing.” 

Derek blinks and Stiles groans because, yeah, he just said that out loud. In real time. To Mr McGrumpy himself. Who is currently not reacting.

Great.

“Uh, I mean,” he attempts to correct himself but it’s too late. Derek is already slowly pulling him in and pressing his lips to his in what is the single most innocent, chaste kiss of Stiles’ life - because, you know, duckling and head movements - but somehow, it still manages to be perfect. 

“Nice,” Stiles whispers, after, waggling his eyebrows.

Derek snorts and kisses him again.

~

“Turn it off,” Derek whines, nuzzling further into Stiles’ neck. “This is why I leave my phone in the kitchen. Like we discussed.

Stiles tries to swat him, ends up kissing his temple. Sue him, he’s tired. “Says the person who can afford to leave their phone in the kitchen. We don’t all have supernatural hearing, asshole.”

Derek whines again. “You also have the worst taste in ringtones.”

Stiles gasps, suddenly sitting up. Well, he tries to. When your boyfriend is made of muscle and is half lying on top of you, it makes moving a lot more difficult. Not that Stiles is really complaining. Much. “I’ll have you know Bushes of Love is a Star Wars parody classic.”    

Derek rolls his eyes, Stiles can feel it, says, “just answer it, sweetums.” 

“Ugh,” Stiles grimaces, “I already told you I’m sorry for the pet-name thing. It was an accident!”

“Calling me your ‘slutty buddy’ in front of your dad was meant as a pet name?”

“It sounded better in my head!”  

Derek groans and wraps an “exasperated” arm around Stiles’ waist. Oh. So. Exasperated. Stiles grins. “Answer. Your. Phone.” 

Stiles finds his phone on the fifth try.

He has fifteen missed calls, all from Erica. Texts too. Every single one is a link to some article online, followed by a string of heart and eggplant emojis.   

Young Love and the Ugly Duckling’,” Stiles reads, clicking on the link. “Uhhh, Derek?” He prods him. 

What.” 

There’s a picture of us in the online Beacon Gazette,” looking into each other’s eyes, like a pair of love sick fools, Stiles wants to add because, wow, is he really that obvious when he looks at Derek? To be fair though, Derek isn’t much better and he is the one with an angry bird on his head.

He prods Derek again and again until he finally gives in, makes him look at the phone. 

“Huh,” he says, blinking at it. “Fred looks pretty pissed that I’m kissing you.” His face breaks out in a smug grin and Stiles rolls his eyes. Hard. 

“You are aware Fred is a duckling, right?” 

“Yes.” Derek grins harder, showing all his teeth, although his cheeks do colour slightly when he catches Stiles’ eye. 

Stiles sighs, totally not fond. “They couldn’t have come up with a better title, though?” he asks, brandishing his phone. “The Ugly Ducking, really?” 

Yeah,” Derek says, frowning. “I mean, I wouldn’t go as far as to call you ugly.” He laughs and Stiles smacks him across the chest with a loud, “hey!”

They both turn back to look at the picture. 

“We look so stupid,” Stiles whispers, shaking his head and biting his thumb. We fit, he thinks. We look like we fit. 

Leaning in, Derek smiles at him. “We do,” he agrees, burying his face back into the warmth of Stiles’ neck, muttering something about home and content and stupid Star Wars parodies.

Stiles snaps a selfie, captions it goals, and sends it to Erica. 

I Hate You (Harry Hook X Reader)

Originally posted by lavendertitties

A/N: I was actually really happy with how this one turned out. I hope you guys like it xxx
Request: Yes!
What about about something with Harry and the daughter of Meg and Hercules? Idk with that wit I feel like they would be a good pair ya know!
Words: 3700 (Holy shit this was a lot longer than planned)
Warnings: Swearing and Fluff


“Ben! I said no. Which word don’t you understand?”
“Come on Y/N, I’m desperate. What am I supposed to do? Turn him away?”
“Come to think of it that’s not such a bad idea”
You knew something was up when Ben called you to his office that morning, he only had meetings there when he wanted something from you. And sure enough, there you were, being sucked into some plan you wanted nothing to do with.
“Y/N it’s not permanent! Just until we make some other arrangements” he said, looking at you with wide eyes, a tactic that usually caused you to cave in.
“I don’t see why it always has to be me!” You fired back, crossing your arms over your chest in protest.
You refused to back down. Being the daughter of Hercules and Meg meant you were fiercely competitive in a way that was often confused for blatant stubbornness, and felt less than enthusiastic to take orders from somebody else. You liked to make your own rules.
“Well, you’re the only student left who doesn’t have a room-mate”
“Fine. Then I’ll take Uma. She seems to just want to keep to herself which is perfectly fine by me.”
You didn’t mind really compromising too much, you’re mothers nature as much of a part of your personality as your father’s.
“She’s rooming with Mal and Evie”.
You spluttered and tried to stop yourself from laughing, knowing full well that living arrangement wouldn’t last for long.
“Queen of hearts daughter?”
“With Lonnie”
You rolled your eyes and sighed
“Okay then, never mind. What about Gil? Gil seems pretty harmless”
“With Jay and Carlos”
“Leah Gothel?”
“Staying with Jane”
“Come on Ben, work with me! What about… um … I don’t know … Hayley Facilier?”
“She’s with Audrey. Look Y/N, I’m only asking because there’s no other option. We’re all out of rooms!”.
You tapped your feet, there was no way you were giving up that easily.
“I swear there’s a rule about boys and girls having separate rooms”
“ Y/N, I’m King, I make the rules”
You huffed once more, taking another deep breath before making a decision you knew you’d regret.
“Okay fine! I’ll room with the pirate!” Ben’s eyes lit up  "What did you say his name is again?“
“Harry. Harry Hook. Thanks Y/N! You won’t regret this!” He said, grabbing your shoulders and pulling you to your dorm.
‘Hmmm” you answered, not entirely convinced the King was right.

You stopped and turned to Ben one more time before opening your dorm door.
“This is going to end badly,” you said flatly.
‘You’ve already said that"
“Yeah, well it seemed worth repeating”.
He chuckled at you, clearly thinking you were joking. You weren’t.
“Come on. He can’t be that bad,” Ben replied, opening the door for you and peering inside your dorm. He nearly jumped out of his skin. “Oh ..wow! This is, well… Different”.
Different was an understatement. You felt your blood start to boil as a you were faced with a tall, red leather jacket clad brunette, swing from your light fitting, painting a red line onto the ceiling that travelled down the walls and across the floor. Most of the walls were tagged with black and red graffiti reading “We ride with the tide” and the floors were already cluttered with miscellaneous pirate paraphernalia. It was safe to say you lost your cool.
“WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE TO MY ROOM!” You screamed charging towards the boy, leaving Ben sheepishly in the doorway.
He dropped from the ceiling so he was stood in front of you, twirling a paintbrush in one hand, a silver hook in the other.
“I decided to make some, how do I put this, improvements. Didn’t think yeh’d mind” He grinned at you taking another step towards you, putting his face uncomfortably close yours. “The names Harry Hook … And you are?”
“GOING TO KILL YOU!” You pushed him backwards “Get this off my walls right now!” You yelled gesturing to the spray paint covering every surface as you charged around the dorm.
“Aren’t ye just a ray of bloody sunshine” he retorted, whistling an unfamiliar tune as he strutted over towards you. “Oh, and seeing as we are skipping the introductions, I thought I’d tell yeh, you’re on my side of the room darlin’ ”.
Your eyes darted towards the pirate, to Ben, and then to the red line, separating one section to the other room to the other. He couldn’t be serious.
“Oh you’ve got to be kidding me” you muttered, starting to square up to Harry who was still grinning at you like a lunatic. He reached forwards, biting the air in front of you.
“Trust me when I say that I don’t do jokes” he replied, barely above a whisper, pushing his hook into the centre of your chest. You shoved it away.
“Ben!” You yelled expecting the King to say something, anything that would be of any use to the situation. He didn’t.
“Well, I’ve got to be going” Ben replied nervously, starting to walk away “I’ll leave you two to… um.. work things out for yourselves”
“Ben! Don’t you dare walk away from me right now!” You shouted after him but it was too late, he was already gone.
“I wouldn’t waste your breath princess, he’s gone”
“I’m not a princess” you growled, charging towards the door after Ben “I’m the daughter of Hercules which makes me a goddess” you added pointedly.
“Ooo, I’m so incredibly sorry your Royal highness. Do forgive me for forgetting to bow down” he replied sarcastically pretending not to have heard you, waving his hook flamboyantly before curtsying.
“I’M NOT A FUCKING PRINCESS! Now look! In fact you know what.. Forget this.”
You charged out of the room but stuck your head, back around the door frame. “This isn’t over Hook”
“Ready for round two when you are…” He paused for a second and smirked “… Princess”
You screamed at him as you stormed down the hallway, knowing full well that life just got a whole lot more difficult.

When you returned to your room later that night, you vowed to prepare for an all out war. Harry Hook was by far the most snarky, inconsiderate human being you had ever met and despite the fact that, yes you found him wildly physically attractive, you wanted him as far away from you as humanly possible. Your plan, as genius as it was, was relatively simple. Annoy the shit out of him until he had no choice but to leave. It was going to be fun.

“Y/N, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING! IT’S 3AM”
The pirate pulled himself up from his from his bed, clutching at his ears, glaring at you through the darkness. Struggling to stand up properly, he reached for the light switch, flooding the dorm room with light. There you were, casually vacuuming the carpet in the middle of the night, making sure to create as much noise as humanly possible.
“I THOUGHT, YOU KNOW THE PLACE COULD DO WITH A LITTLE CLEAN UP,” you yelled, competing for your voice to be heard above the whirring of the vacuum.
You smirked to yourself, the look on Harry’s face was priceless, a mixture of anger and pure confusion.
“TURN IT OFF”
“Nope!” You said in a sing song voice, continuing to move the vacuum up and down across the carpet.
“Y/N I said turn it off now!” Harry growled, charging towards you and taking it from your hands.
“You know, I don’t find you at all intimidating while you’re stood in pyjamas with tiny pirate ships on them” you cooed at him, squeezing his cheeks “Coochy Coochy coo!”
Harry looked down at himself, bare chested wearing only a pair of rather embarrassing shorts. You chuckled at his scowl.
“I could hurt yeh” he said, pulling himself closer and teasing through your hair with his hook “My enemies don’t usually last this long before I hook their pretty little faces”
“Oh how sweet of you! You must really love me then because the last time I checked my face was still in tact”.
You placed a piece of gum you were chewing on the end of his hook and danced on back to bed.
“You’ll regret doing this Y/N,” he said bitterly, pulling the vacuum chord and trudging back over to his bed.
“Sure I will. Right, well I do love having these little chats with you but I have an important meeting with Fairy Godmother in the morning so I’m going to sleep”
With that the lights turned out and you collapsed backwards into bed, feeling slightly accomplished.
“You don’t know what you’ve started princess” whispered the pirate inaudible “You don’t know what you’ve started”

King Ben didn’t really know what to expect when he trudged back up to Y/N’s dorm room the following morning. There had been noise complaints all night from neighbouring rooms on the same wing so he had guessed they still hadn’t worked out their very apparent  differences. He knocked on their door but after no reply he pushed it open himself. He had no idea what to say when he walked in on you pelting Harry with your shoes.
“I swear down Hook where are they?” You howled, picking up a flip flop and throwing it in Harry’s general direction.
He dodged it, virtually crying from laughter as you continue to stomp about.
“I have absolutely no idea what yeh talking about Y/N” he chuckled, clearly lying, catching a high heel and lobbing it back towards you.
“Harry! Please! I have to go, where are my shoes?” You begged, trying to reason with him.
“They’re all over the bloody place!” Neither of you had even noticed Ben standing there observing your thought-provoking behaviour.
“YOU THINK I DON’T KNOW THAT! THEY’RE ALL LEFT SHOES! THERE ARE NO FULL PAIRS”
Harry convulsed with laughter again until a ballet pump hit him in the face mid-flight.
“Now was that really necessary Princess?”
“I’M NOT A PRINCESS FOR THE LAST TIME!” You yelled at him, finally deciding that you would just have to go barefoot.
You spotted Ben “I told you this was a bad idea” you said, waggling your finger at him. The poor King was speechless.
“Prin-cess, prin-cess,prin-cess…” Harry started chanting in a whisper, causing you to shoot round and glare at him. He was still smirking.
“It’s okay Harry,” You said as you left with Ben, “Because last night, after I finished vacuuming, I fed your pirate hat through the paper shredder”

You and Harry refused to speak to each other until the next morning, when you continued your plan to irritate Harry until he had no choice but to move out. Subtlety was key in your opinion, so all of your moves were small and calculated.
“Morning Harry” you said as sweetly as you could manage, “I made you coffee”.
The boy, furrowed his eyebrows, confused by the gesture but took the mug anyway.
‘You ever hear of a little bit of gratitude?“ You mumbled as you made your way into the bathroom to brush your teeth.
“Apparently not. Please, enlighten me. Give me the benefit of ye vast wisdom” he replied sarcastically, following you.
“Keep rolling your eyes Hook, you might find your brain back their”. You ran your toothbrush under the tap as he winked at you through the bathroom mirror.
He took a sip of his coffee.
“Did you?” He spat the whole thing out “Ye petty little shit. Replacing sugar with salt. I bet ye finding this so very funny aren’t yeh” Harry said completely deadpan.
“Hilarious actually” you remarked, putting the toothpaste onto the bristles and starting to brush your teeth.
“You know what’s even more hilarious?” He started, so you turned your head to face him. The corners of his lips tugged up into a smirk. “Last night, I used your toothbrush”        

“Ben I can’t do this anymore!” You complained to your best friend as you headed to the Tourney fields.
“What do you mean?”
“I woke up this morning to find that he had covered the entirety of my side of the room in pink post it notes, including me, when I was sleeping!” you said, throwing your hands up in the air
Ben gave you a stern look.
“Y/N you’re even worse. Yesterday, when you took his hook, he spent the whole day traipsing around campus with a pirate map you gave him, trying to find it. After all that you’d hidden it under his bed!”
“That was pretty funny though” you said, trying to contain your giggles.
“See you’re just as bad as each other. If I didn’t know any better I’d think you even liked him”
You punched the King in the arm playfully. As much as you wanted it not to be true, you had a sneaking suspicion that Ben was right. All you could think about was Harry, whether it was good or bad, and in some very strange way you began growing fond of the pirate. It was very worrying and you wanted more than anything for it to stop
“Ben you don’t know anything”

You returned back to your room that night, carrying the next stage of the plan. Smiling to yourself as you propped open the door with one hand, cradling Harry’s surprise with the other.
“Honey I’m home!” You screeched jokingly.
“Aren’t I just over the moon” Harry replied, jumping up from the sofa holding one of my dresses which he had cut holes into.
Then he looked at me.
“What the hell are ye holding?”
“Oh this,” you said, setting it down on the floor “This Harry is a cat.”
The kitten looked at me before darting off, springing up onto the window sill and curling up into a ball to sleep.
“I know it’s a fucking cat Y/N.  I want to know why ye brought it into our room” he said, quieter than you would have expected, bringing his face extremely close to yours again. You could feel his breath against you skin.
“Do you always use flirting as an intimidation technique or is it just me who’s personal space you invade on a daily basis”
“Y/N! I’m allergic to cats”
“Oh really! I never knew that.” You lied.
Of course you knew, that was the whole reason you got the cat in the first place.
“Mr Shnookem’s is staying exactly where he is”
“I’m telling ye now Y/N, the first time you take yeh eyes of that thing I’ll…”
You pushed your index finger to his lips, taking him by surprise.
“ Shhh I don’t want to hear it Harry”
You dropped your hand and walked to Mr Shnookem’s, just as he sneezed hysterically, giggling to yourself as you felt his eyes burn into you.

*Short time skip to the end of the week*

“HAROLD FUCKING HOOK!”
“Geez Y/N, with the amount of times you scream my name a day next door probably think we are…”
“What have you done with him?”
You had woken up to find Mr Shnookem’s was no longer sat at the foot of your bed like he did every night, and had spent the whole morning searching for him. You had checked everywhere the kitten could have wander off to, to no avail, with Harry being the only logical culprit for his disappearance.
“Yeh not seriously talking about that mangey cat are ye?” He asked barely looking up from the bowl of cake he was eating
“That cat never did anything to you” you spat “Well, tell me! What have you done with him?”
Harry raised an eyebrow at you, still not moving.
“I didn’t touch the stupid thing. Ye probably scared it off with ye non-stop scre…”
“I HATE YOU!” You slammed your hands down on the table Harry was sat at.
You loved that cat and were becoming more concerned and annoyed at Harry every second he refused to tell you where it’d gone. Harry slammed his bowl full of cake down and stood up, to stare you in the eye.
“Oh, ye hate me?” The pirate began “Join the club! There are weekly meetings at the corner of Fuck You Street and Kiss my Ass Boulevard”
“And to think I was finally warming up to the idea of becoming friends with you,” You said, but the tone was far more dispirited than you had expected it to be.
You turned and started to trudge away, before the pirate could see you tear up.
“Can ye stop accusing me for one min… Wait, are ye crying?” Harry’s voice softened towards the end of his sentence, a hint of confusion etched into the Scottish accent.
As much as you tried, you couldn’t help but cry. You looked back at Harry with blurry eyes, watching his shift in demeanour as he tried to work out what to do about the situation.
“I want my cat back!” You wailed like a toddler, your face crumpling as you wiped your running nose, no longer caring what he thought of you.
Harry dropped his smirk and instinctively pulled you into a hug, wrapping his strong arms around, and stroking the back of your head.
“Ye know I really didn’t do anything to him” he started, squeezing you a little tighter. “But if that stupid cat means that much to ye, I’ll help ye find it”
You shuffled backwards a little, looking up at Harry who towered slightly above you.
“Thanks,” you said meekly “I’d like that”.

Harry took your hand as you scowered the grounds of Auradon Prep for the runaway cat, purposefully ignoring your gaze as your palms brushed beside one another. It had become dark by now so the two of you began calling out for the kitten, pointing a torch in the direction of any trees or bushes where he could have been hiding.
“MR SHNOOKEM’S!” Harry called out, “Ye couldn’t have picked a more ridiculous name now could ye?”
“Hey! I think it’s cute,” you defended “Ridiculous, yes, but cute. MR SHNOOKEMS!”
“Sounds like somebody I know” the pirate mumbled.
“Did you jus…”
“MR SHNOOKEMS!” Yelled Harry cutting you off mid-sentence.
Your eyes lingered on Harry’s face, fixated on the blue of his eyes. He caught you smiling at him.
“What?” He asked.
“Nothing it’s just, maybe you’re not as bad as I thought”
“Are ye softening up to me Y/N?” Harry joked, a hint of cheekiness leaking back into his accent.
“Shut it! The word bad is still in the sentence” You laughed, lacing your fingers tighter with his.
“Oh thank god! I would have had to cancel my war plans if not. Ye should see what I have planned for tomorrow”  
“Of all the possible villains, why did I have to get you?” You sighed theatrically, clearly joking.
'Of all the princess’s why did I have to get…“
At the mention of the word princess you shoved Harry backwards, causing him to stumble and fall head first into one of the flowerbeds surrounding the castle. You burst into hysterical laughter, before offering a hand to the pirate, who was whispering profanities to himself
“Yeh way stronger than you look ye kn… Well, well well, look what we have here!”
From the flower bed Harry pulled a very scruffy but easily recognisable Mr Shnookem’s, scooping it up in his arms and handing him you. Immediately, you nuzzled your face into the cats fur, wrapping it in a warm embrace. A beaming smile spread across both of your faces, as the two of you let out an ecstatic cheer, Harry grabbing one of your hands to twirl around in glee, celebrating at your success.
“We found him!” You giggled.
“I found him,” Harry corrected, sticking his tongue out at you and reeling you in closer with the hand he had been spinning you with
You pouted.
“I love you” you said, barely above a whisper.
“If ye tell that damn cat ye love him one more time, I swear I’ll…”
“I wasn’t talking about to the cat”
There was an uneasy silence that seemed to last a lifetime
“Y/N, your lip’s bleeding”
“How can that possibly matter?,” you said panicked at the confession you accidentally made and the fact that Harry wasn’t reacting “Did you not hear what I just sa..”
He didn’t give you time to react before he leaned in and kissed you, a subtle taste of metallic blood lingering across your lips. He ran his hand down your neck and along your collarbone, pulling away and blinking at you. You flung yourself into his arms, Mr Shnookem’s and all, letting go of the remaining reservations you had about the pirate boy . You ran your fingers along Harry’s cheekbones, down his chest and curving onto his back, tracing the contours of his shoulders blades. You felt him shudder slightly at your touch creating a the buzz of electricity. You reached for his hand, pressing your thumb against his wrist as he snuggled into your hair. You could feel the blood going through his veins, an indicator of how fast his heart was beating.
Neither of you moved until the kitten climbed between the two of you and began to lick Harry’s face. You laughed a little.
“See, Mr Shnookem’s does like you”
“I’m still allergic to the bloody thing” Harry shot back, pushing you playfully by the shoulder to get the cat away from him.
“It’s a good job I picked up these for you then,” You said, reaching into you back pocket and shaking a tub of allergy medication at Harry.
He titled his head at you, staring into your eyes with a mixture of curiosity and amusement.
“What?” You said, picking at a thread on your jumper nervously  "You forgot to pick up your prescription”
Harry let out a hearty belly laugh and wrapped you back into a hug, squeezing you until you have to pull away for air.
“Daughter of Hercules”
“Son of Hook”
“I. Love. You”. Harry brushed his lips gently against your forehead sending you into another fit of giggles.
“Does this mean we can get rid of the red line in our dorm room now?”
“Ye know what, that doesn’t sound like the worse idea”

Dandelions: finished summary!

again, I’m sorry I had to stop this project. I had a LOT more story to tell and my depression just wasn’t letting me have the motivation to do so. School is starting back up again and I knew I wouldn’t be able to work on any comic pieces once that happened so here is the summary of what I want to do with the rest of the story! 

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husband highs — tom h.

Originally posted by tsseract

author’s note: GUYS IM SCREAMING because i hit 1k and wow i just wanted to thank you guys by posting something. i love YOU THANK YOU FOR READING MY STUFF and since i never leave a link to my masterlist i thought i should this time so here it is.  → masterlist


  • tom would be the most extra fiance ever like he wouldn’t ever not talk about how he’s engaged to the most beautiful girl ever
  • LOL WHO AM I KIDDING HE’D SAY YOU GUYS ARE MARRIED
  • especially in interviews like he’d be on press tour to promote his movie and the interviewer would slip in a congratulatory and tom would be like
    • “thank you, thank you so much, really. i’m happy, my wife is amazing”
  • and the interviewer would be like tf i thought this kid was engaged
    • “it says here you announced your engagement yester-”
    • “WE’RE MARRIED”
  • and you’d always tell tom that he couldn’t go around telling people you two were married when you two JUST GOT ENGAGED
  • it was sending mixed signals everywhere
  • especially since tom liked to wear a ring on his wedding finger
  • he’d just wanted everyone to know that he was taken because if you had a ring showing the entire world that you were his, why couldn’t he have one to show off he was yours???
  • it was the cutest thing ever and it never failed to make you smile whenever you saw his hand 
  • anyways since he had to finish filming a movie and do a press tour you guys decided that your wedding would be after he finished both
  • that’s probably one of the reasons he couldn’t shut up about you to everyone because he was SO EXCITED
  • while he was away he’d always facetime you
  • sometimes he’d be so hyper
    • “HI MY BEAUTIFUL GIRL GUESS WHAT TODAY IS??
    • “it’s the second-”
    • “THAT’S RIGHT WE GET MARRIED IN 184 DAYS”

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@ parents of lgbt+ kids

Having homophobic and/or transphobic parents can actually destroy someone on the inside. It is a soul destroying feeling when those closest to you, the people you grew up with or still are growing up with, won’t accept who you are, or even disown you for simply being who you are.

When I came out as a lesbian my mum didn’t even look at me for a month, let alone talk to me. She told me that lesbians disgust her and she didn’t want a gay daughter. My dad kept telling me repeatedly that I was confused, telling me it was a choice and calling me “dyke” in the process. My grandmother told me I was going to hell, I was damaged, unnatural, dirty, sinful, and still calls it an “unsettling phase”.

Every individual experience is different, but because of the clear message I got off my dad when I was 9 years old and he told me “never come home and tell me you’re gay” I buried my sexuality for years, dated boys, kissed boys, would have gone a lot further with them if I had ever been in a position to do so, sometimes even hoped to end up in that position because I was so desperate to be “normal” even though the thought of doing anything with a boy disgusted me, which in turn filled me with even more self hatred, didn’t tell anyone when I was harassed online by a man twice my age when I was only 13 because I thought it was the least I deserved after having such “unnatural” thoughts. I grew to have so much internalised homophobia due to the fear I had of being gay because my dad had said that to me when I was only 9 years of age. I faked crush after crush on boys, staring at their Facebook profiles willing myself to feel something, anything, yet looking at a random girl in the street and feeling a fire burn inside me, yet still not accepting it, burying it and blocking it out.

I blocked it out as best as possible, talking about boys and acting as straight as possible, especially around my friends, until I was almost 16, when I saw a lesbian couple kiss on BBC television on at 8pm programme, and in that moment, I knew that was what I wanted, I knew that I couldn’t spend my life being something I’m just not, pretending every day of my life. I knew in that moment that I was gay, I knew that I wanted a girlfriend, I knew that I wanted a wife, and for the first time the idea of marriage seemed appealing, and I felt at peace and like I truly knew myself.

So a couple of months later, I told my friends, which took more courage than I knew I had. After that went well, I felt confident enough to tell my parents, encouraged by the good experience of coming out to my friends.

I was a mess when I told my mum. Although I felt confident enough to do it, I was still terrified and shaking and it was the most nerve racking moment of my life. I didn’t mean for it to happen how it did, and I could have told her in a better way, but in that moment I felt I had to, it was the right time for me. After I told her, I went to my room where I sent her a text, which I’m not going to quote entirely because it’s too personal, but it explained everything, I told her the journey of discovering my sexuality, I told her I loved her, I explained my fears, my feelings, my experiences, everything. In response I received a text saying: “I can’t pretend I’m happy about this. I’m not at all, but I love you regardless.” Although I had wanted a proper conversation, I accepted that she was shocked and took the text as acceptance of me. However, later that day, I went downstairs and saw her for the first time since I told her. She was crying and wouldn’t look at me. When I went downstairs, she went upstairs. I tried not to be upset, understanding her shock and giving her time. After a week of not spending more than a minute in a room with her, and not having her look at me once, I decided to try again, so I said to her “we need to talk about this” but she walked away from me. I tried texting so she wouldn’t have to directly talk, but she ignored everything I sent her.

Throughout the month, nothing changed, I was constantly ignored by her, and when she told my dad without consulting me, he just told me I was confused, and shouted at me for upsetting everyone, telling me I was messing up my GCSEs because of my confusion and immature phase, when the only thing endangering my grades was their prejudice and discrimination against their own daughter. As the month progressed, with still no change in either of them, I felt more and more worthless, my internalised homophobia reared its head once more, more prominent than ever, and I considered all sorts of things that I don’t even want to go into, I even looked at conversion therapy at one point because I felt like such a failure and a disappointment to my family, and my grandmother was the worst, calling me damaged and an unnatural sinner constantly.

The day my mum spoke to me again I was so shocked I could barely reply. She acted as though the last month hadn’t even happened, and went on like that for a week, blocking out what had happened, never once mentioning it, evidently hoping that it had all gone away or that her ignoring me had made me bury it again so it couldn’t tarnish our family and I could just live an unhappy life. At the end of that week, I mentioned it. I said “it’s not a phase” and she still wouldn’t talk, which is when I started to show my anger. This is when she told me that lesbians disgust her, spewing the typical hate about hell and morality and sin. Not being able to take it anymore, I locked myself in the bathroom, sat in the bathtub and properly cried for the first time in months. All my emotions came flooding out, and I would say that day was the saddest and most hopeless I’d ever felt. I felt utterly rejected, outcast, like I could never belong, like a disappointment, and a failure as a daughter, as a person.

During an argument with my dad, he called me a dyke, declaring I was damaged and that something had obviously gone drastically wrong during my development to “turn me”.

Those few months I felt so sad, lonely, isolated, rejected, hopeless and crushed. The two most important people in my life practically disowned me, and it took all the fight and courage I had to keep going, to keep pushing on, and I’m glad I did, because I love myself and have never been prouder of who I am, and things are better now, not completely, but they’re better, even though I can’t talk openly, even though I still feel insecure, even though I still tense up every time I so much as approach the subject around my parents, things are better.

All this occurred before and during my GCSE exams, when I should have been studying. My results are due at the end of this month, and I’ve accepted that I’m not going to have done very well, and I tell myself that it’s through no fault of my own. Through everything that was happening, I still found time to study. I tried my hardest but when the people closest to you seem to hate you for being you, it’s kind of hard to concentrate and focus on anything other than the constant throbbing ache inside when you know your parents, the people who made you, the people who raised you, the people who always told you they loved you, don’t accept you.

So parents of LGBTQA+ children and teenagers, please please accept your child. If you weren’t prepared for the possibility of your child not being straight and/or cis, then you shouldn’t have had a child. Simple as that. Your child’s sexuality and gender are just as natural as they hair colour and eye colour. Please, please, please love your children, accept them, support them. Everything I went through could have been avoided had my parents done so. And the scary thing is I was lucky. Some people are thrown out, completely disowned, attacked, some people are even killed. I count myself lucky, and that’s sad. It’s sad that I count myself lucky for being unaccepted by my parents, because some people could tell stories that would make you sick about their coming out, that would make your skin crawl, but this is my story, and I’m sharing it in the hope that it will help young LGBTQA+ individuals, but also in the hope that it will help parents. Please love your children. Accept them. Support them. Tell them you love them. Make them feel accepted. Make them feel supported. Because you could lose them. Far too many young people take their own lives because their parents don’t accept them, simply because of who they want to love.

Love is love, and love is the most important thing.

rockerangel9  asked:

Hey,Again I wanted to Resqust another Headcannon of Richie and Eddie. This one is Eddie is out as gay and a kid from school is hitting on him. How would Richie react

~ First of all, Eddie loves telling his coming out story because it is literally one of the funniest things that’s ever happened to him in his whole life and it for sure made the situation less scary and stressful. 

~ He impulsively announced that he had something to say when all the losers were packed into Bills car and he was sitting nervously on the passengers side. He wasn’t quite sure why but this felt like the moment. His mouth spoke before he could stop it. “I have something to tell you guys!” he shouted and instantly regretted it. 

~ He hadn’t even thought about how being packed into a car meant he’d have no way to escape if it all went south. He bit into his lip as his friends quieted to give him attention, even Richie. He swallowed….thinking of all the ways he could possibly back out. “I…well I just wanted to say-”

~ Suddenly, the radio that had been playing some soft song, burst with it’s new loud choice-

~ “I’m Coming Out!” Chimed the radio in Diana Ross’s voice. The car went silent as Eddie took the leap.

~ “That! I wanted to say that!” 

~ “That…you’re coming out?” Beverly asked, a small smile started at the corner of her lips. 

~ Eddie nodded profusely and everyone broke into laughter, Eddie was worried for what felt like an eternity until Bill pats his shoulder and reassures him that they love and support him. 

~With that over with, Eddie walks with his head a little higher in school. He feels so much better about himself. All of the losers notice instantly. 

~ He’s not quite sure why or how, but most of the school just knows too. Eddie notices the decrease in boys comfortably around him. It kills him. His own lab partner seems to have to make sure they sit as far apart as possible. 

~ What quirks peoples eyebrows is the fact that Richie Tozier seems like he hasn’t gotten the memo. Everyone gives him odd looks when Richie throws his arm around Eddie like it’s no big deal. Richie still pinches Eddie’s cheeks like many students saw in passing before. And Richie still sat incredibly close to him. 

~ Eddie secretly adored that he hadn’t changed. He didn’t really think his friends would but he was still thankful that Richie kept on teasing him just the same. 

~ The students though, couldn’t seem to process it. They watched it happen with confusion until Skippy Peterson supplied Richie with smokes in the bathroom. 

“Y’know, Eddie Kaspbrak’s gay right? Aren’t you worried he’ll think you’re flirting with him? What if he thinks he has a shot with you?” 

~ Richie flicked his lighter on and took a deep breath. “I sure hope he does. I’ve been flirting with him since we were like ten. He could’ve had me back then. We could’ve been holding hands at recess if he wanted.” and then he spun out the door, leaving Skippy feeling dumb. 

~ Richie left the bathroom just in time to catch some dude loitering by Eddie’s locker. Which was his job. He started strolling over until Eddie came into view…he could only just hear the conversation.

~ “Hey, Eddie right? I saw you with your friends the other day but I was a little nervous to talk to you then.” 

~ “Why would you be nervous Connor? I have those notes you wanted in my locker, if you would’ve asked I would’ve given em’ to you.” Eddie shrugged as he opened his locker. 

~ Richie rolled his eyes, a little glad that Eddie couldn’t be more oblivious to the fact that this Connor guy was flirting with him. 

~ As Eddie stood on his tip toes to reach, Connor took the chance to look him up and down. That was the last straw. Richie bounded over and slung his arm around Eddie’s shoulders. “How ya doin’ Eds?” he ruffled his hair and gave Connor a back off look. 

“Don’t call me that- Oh here you go, Connor.” Eddie handed him the notes and he looked like he might say something else to Eddie but then took another glance at Richie and decided against. 

“Huh, wonder where he’s going so fast?” 

~ “Probably to find some other guy to flirt with.” 

~ “He was not flirting with me.” Eddie rolled his eyes as Richie leaned against the neighboring locker, looking smug. 

“He had his eyes all over you, Eds. His flirting isn’t as good as mine though, Right?” Richie stuck his nose in the air. Eddie gave him a confused look. 

“How would I know?” 

~ “Because I’m always flirting with you…..is this not as clear as I thought?”