he is not allowed to do that

Little context: Since my party was mostly new players and I really wanted to sell them on DnD (Dragon Age Homebrew) being a game where you can do anything, I allowed a lot of seduction in the beginning of the game and I’m regretting it bc now there are almost no NPCs that haven’t had sex with the party. Here are some highlights

Me (DM): You’ve fucked him well enough that he gives you all his tea.

Me: You’ve convinced the pirate to remove his pants. (rolls a d20) He’s pretty well-hung

Me: The 80 year old librarian agrees and takes you to a back room

Our Mage: Does she teach me how to use magic sexually?

Me: Sure

Our Blood Mage (in combat): I’m pretty well off as a male Qunari right?

Me: Yeah? I mean I guess I roll for it now. (Roll a nat 20)

Blood Mage: I drop my pants to intimidate him to leave. (non-nat 20)

Me: I hate you guys.

False Alarm


Sam was in the library, researching an old symbol that he has never laid eyes on before for Garth. He had been slaving over it all day while his brother was out on a supply run and Y/N was cleaning up and doing laundry. He really didn’t mind doing the research for Garth, but he certainly didn’t enjoy doing it on his own. 

  He ran his hand over his face in an attempt to wake himself up a little more but no avail. He needed something strong, something more effective that would give him the burst of energy he needed to push in an extra couple of hours. He knew for sure the bunker was still stocked up with coffee. The last time they ran out, both Dean and Y/N grabbed as many bags as the store would allow them to purchase and touch wood, they haven’t ran out since. 

  He got up from his chair, shutting off his laptop before heading towards the kitchen to fix himself a nice snack and a fresh cup of joe. He reached for his mug and the pot of coffee when he was instantly broken from his thoughts by a scream.

  “FUCK!” he heard. 

  He practically slammed he mug on the counter and reached to the back of his jeans for his gun before wearily making his way through the bunker halls, following in the direction of the scream. By the time he found the source of the abruption, to say he was confused was an understatement.

  “Y/N? What happened? Are you injured?” he questioned all at once. Of course she wasn’t okay. She had tears welling in her eyes and she was on the ground. 

  “No I’m not okay,” she replied angrily. “I stubbed my freakin’ toe and it hurts!”

  “You- you stubbed your toe? Really?” He said, completely taken back. He thought you had been shot or something worse. 

  “It was the baby toe. I think I broke it,” she muttered. Sam pushed the hair away from his face and looked at the girl on the ground in front of him. She looked so small in that moment. He did feel bad for her though. Stubbing your toe hurt like a bitch. But the way she carried on made him smile a little.

  “You want me to carry you?” he offered. 

  “I’m a big girl Sammy,” she stated. “But I’m going to need your help getting up… and walking.” He let out a chuckle before helping her up off the ground. 

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Why do I lose followers or get angry messages whenever I make Nazi jokes?? Nazis are bad and I am making fun of the fact that they are bad. That is what Nazi jokes are literally meant to do: make fun of the bad people because if they had won we (my fellow Jews and the rest of the world) wouldn’t be allowed/able to make fun of them. Hitler HATED it when people poked fun at Nazis, so doing the exact thing he hated is like rubbing it in his face that he lost, ya know? Anyway, cracking jokes that make fun of how bad Nazis were doesn’t equate to supporting or sympathizing with Nazis. That makes absolutely no sense.

pining hcs for tjeffs;

boss’ memo : alternative title: “so, he likes you. how can i tell? well–”

Originally posted by gravitywon


  • thomas has an almost childlike way of dealing with someone he’s got a crush on, in that he will roast them (and then will promptly scream internally and will for himself to stay quiet and leave you alone,, stop insulting your crush, thomas. they don’t come here to be burned)
    • he generally will seek out your attention through teasing (both of the making fun and the flustering type)
      • he may attempt to brag about all his prior partners to see the reaction it gets from you–he’s found that it’s best to identify someone’s motives when they’re upset, and he’d really like to know how you feel about him. he obviously doesn’t want you to dislike him either, so he does allow himself to do nice things to earn your favor,,
      • overall, he wants to know what makes you tick, so he can find his way into your heart.
    • thomas gives you strange, backhanded compliments??
      • “that shirt looks awful. here’s this one that i just happened to be carrying around that just so happens to make you look really good.”
      • it’s almost as if he’s thinking of the compliment first, and then trying to follow it up with an insult so he doesn’t seem soft…
  • if you start acting mean to him as a result of his behavior–and you’ve got every right to–it’s likely that he’s going to complain to james, who will take one look at thomas rambling about you, and will just leave to tell you himself. based on the way james says it, however, there’s a large chance that you won’t believe him.
  • one way to tell that he likes you is a sudden increase in physical contact–as if he doesn’t know what to do with himself once in your proximity and doesn’t want you to go. a gentle grasp on your elbow (he excuses this by saying it’s rude for you to leave while he’s debating), a presence leaning over you (he excuses this by mumbling something vaguely coherent into your ear).
    • another way to tell is that he’ll often be lost in his thoughts–looking off to the side with his eyebrows furrowed. he flusters whenever james snaps him out of it (which he does often. thomas likes to fantasize.)

hinatapie  asked:

Hi! Sorry for having spammed you with so much notes in these last hours, I really couldn't help it... By the way, you mentioned Souda saying he'd rather suck Hinata's dick than allow Sonia to do it, is it a real thing?! I mean, in the real anthologies?

yes. a hamster bites him on/near the dick and sonia’s like… we gotta suck out the poison dude. RIGHT now.

background image taken from here

Previous Levi 

Admiral of the Fleet:  Erwin Smith. 

From his chair in the command centre he allowed his mind wondered to the dinner he had planned with Levi that night. He rarely allowed himself to indulge in personal  matters. He laughed softly to himself, even rarely was too generous. Erwin had unintentionally become much like the ancient monks of history. He had given his heart to an order he believed in taking a vow of celibacy, if he could he wouldn’t even piss or shit, he wouldn’t take the time to eat just focus on his goal of freeing the universe and inhalation of the titan parasites. But Levi, Levi had been slowly chipping away at his iron mask and stone heart, Levi didn’t even do anything that was significant. He just became a precense Erwin could no longer live without. 

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For months, Sam begged to be taken to a dress shop. “Just to look around.” he told his brother, day after day, hoping to reason with him. 

His words didn’t seem to work even after offering Dean the small allowance that John had given him in the past from doing things like, the dishes and researching the next case for him. On the ride home from school, Sam asked once more and after watching Dean grow angry and flustered from the question, the boy stopped asking. It wasn’t easy to ignore the way he squirmed around against the seat, white knuckling the steering wheel and breathing heavily.

“Dean? I didn’t mean to make you- so… mad.” The teen uncomfortably pressed himself as far into the door as possible, would rather be anywhere than the passenger seat, in that moment. The rest of the ride home was silent, and when Sam got out of the car, he was left in the dust, watching as the impala peeled out onto the gravel road. 

The next few hours were the longest of his life. Without Dean there, he was beyond bored and so exhausted from worrying that he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore. Moments after falling asleep, the motel door was being slammed open and shut quickly, making the boy jump awake and sit up near the edge.

A plastic bag was dropped in his lap and wide eyes followed Dean as he walked toward the opposite bed. 

“You’re welcome, Princess.” Dean sighed softly, back turned toward his baby brother, eyes closed.

Sam took the bag to the bathroom and sat on the edge of the tub, pulling out the contents. It was soft, was the first thing to cross his mind. The second thing was ‘Holy shit, Dean bought me a dress.’ It was a cotton baby doll t-shirt dress. Black, and simple, no ruffles or silk or anything, and Sam loved it that way.

Putting it on was easy, his tall lanky body fit perfectly into the soft fabric. No curves to be hugged made for a straight silhouette but he didn’t mind. Though when he realized that his briefs stuck out at the bottom, he ended up taking them off, letting them fall to the floor and leaving them there. Too excited to get out of there and to show Dean.

Upon exiting the bathroom, he found himself standing at the edge of the bed, eyeing his brother. “Dean?” He asked quietly, and instead of asking anything more, the boy reached down and held to Dean’s hand, lifting it to slowly caress at the soft cotton. 

Green eyes rolled open and scanned over Sam’s small body, before creasing as he smirked. 

“Lay down, Sam.”

A doodle of Worf and Tasha (aka the USS Enterprise’s Security Dream Team) that didn’t quite go to plan.

For the record, Tasha is basically the only person Worf would allow to do this, and only because their working and personal relationship is so good. Worf will carry people if it’s necessary for their survival (saving people from wreckage for example), but he’s not going to let random smaller aliens hitch a ride on his carapace. Tasha’s an exception, and really it’s a purely-for-the-job thing. Worf can’t turn his head without turning his entire body, but Tasha can, and she can direct him in battle from her vantage point.

Not that all this is usually needed, but it’s a tactic they’ve developed together to fit more extreme situations.

Instagram

Welp.

Whatever Barry is doing, he’s not allowed to kill anyone…

Oh my god, is he here to break Ross out? I hope not, because Ross taking part in a jailbreak would only make her seem even more guilty.

And also he’s TEAMING UP WITH LING

FUCK YEAH, BARRY AND LING ARE THE DREAM TEAM, LADS

Also, Barry expressed keen interest in Xing, so that is very interesting to me.

The Aftermath Addendums

Friday. March 24


Okay, do you know what’s not cool? This whole, entire week!!!

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Ok this is fine again because you know what this goes back to the first CS villain shipper Cora. 

“You chose her”

Killian chose to tell Nemo he was not going to run away because Snow told him about Regina and he fully believed he was allowed his happy ending after everything he has done in his past. Now stay with me. This episode while it will rip our hearts out and step on them shows that Killian is CHOOSING to go back to Emma because she is HOME and his HAPPY ENDING like he is hers. 

Think of this as Snowings “I will always find you”. For Captain Swan it is “I will always choose you”. Their story is about picking the other in anything they do whether it is an adventure to another realm or trusting that they will always make the right choice. This separation pains us but it is just another piece of the “I will always choose you” story. 

Emma and Killian will be reunited we know that so yes be bothered for the separation but remember…Killian CHOSE to help Emma on the beanstalk, Killian CHOSE to come back to help Emma to take her to Neverland, Emma CHOSE to open up and let Killian in. Killian is now CHOOSING and FIGHTING with the his new BFFS, Nemo, Liam 2.0, Aladdin, Jasmine and Ariel, to get back to her because CHOOSING to be a good man for and too Emma is the most important thing in Killian’s life. 

more outsiders hc’s

-Mrs. Curtis played BINGO every Monday night and the gang used to tease Ponyboy because we always wanted to go with her
-Soda and Ponyboy used to dress up in their mother’s high heels and do performances for their parents when they were little
-Darry still remember’s the first time his dad taught him how to throw a football, mainly because he accidentally hit Mr. Curtis in the face with it
-And he just grinned at Darry and was like ‘That’s ma boy”
-Ponyboy once stuck gum in Steve’s hair and Steve has never forgiven him
-Darry once tried to sell his brothers to a stranger at the park; Mrs. Curtis was not impressed
-Johnny and Ponyboy once made a ‘No Girls Allowed’ club which caused Two-bit to give them their first lecture on the ‘wonders’ of women…It was highly traumatic. 

A few Katara/Iroh/Mai and Aang/Zuko Parallel Notes

So, a long time ago I pointed out this parallel here, which shows Aang and Zuko reflecting on the changes that have occurred since they left and returned home in their own unique ways–Aang through his being frozen and going to see the Southern Air Temple, and Zuko from his banishment.

Revisiting “The Southern Air Temple” again, I noticed that I actually missed a couple of points in regards to this parallel. 

We see, for example, Zuko repeatedly talking about going home. Whether it’s in “The Avatar Returns,” when we first see him mention going home; “The Avatar State,” which involves Azula tricking Zuko into thinking he’s going home; or “The Crossroads of Destiny,” which gives us Zuko doing the thing that allows him to go home. 

While I originally did mention the Zuko/Aang parallel between “The Southern Air Temple” and “The Awakening,” what completely flew over my head the first time around was the Katara/Iroh/Mai parallel that’s also present here. 

To elaborate, Iroh repeatedly warns Zuko about going home in “The Avatar State,” warning him about Ozai and his intents, telling him that that there is more to Azula’s plan than Zuko thinks. This kind of parallels Katara in “The Southern Air Temple,” with her warning to Aang about what he may see at the air temple paralleling Iroh. 

Of course, Aang and Zuko are both eager to return home, and they deal with their own unique consequences for their decisions in their own special way.

That said, there’s another angle to this as well. We know, for example, that Mai is supposed to be a bit of an Iroh stand-in–listening to him when he’s brooding, calling him out when he’s out of line, etc. Throw in the Katara/Mai parallels in there as well, and we get a demonstration of a really nice dynamic between our protagonist/deuteragonist, and the people who help them on their respective journeys. 

“I think there are a lot of loose strings which will be tied up — but leaving enough to allow for future things,” Harding told EW of the finale, adding that he thought a revival “would be great.” And his dream scenario for the Liars’ return? “We come back and then the show moves [to], like, Netflix, so we do it up: Suddenly there’s, like, swearing and full-blown nudity. It’s the show that everybody wanted but couldn’t have. That’s what I want. I want there to be bloody murder all over the place. Like Pretty Little Liars meets Saw.”

—–

Ian Harding is once again, in interview, demonstrating his almost complete lack of fucks.

I’d watch the shit out of that show. Gore, swearing and sex to the mountains. I like the way you think, man.

This is why he lingers at the top of my TBF list.

12sorryforgotmypancakes12  asked:

Do you know if all the powers we seen David use are actually all his because they said The Shadow King is powerful in his own right so I don't know.

yep, the powers we see David use are his own! the reason the shadow king started leeching off of David and invading his mind is because he was so powerful.The Shadow King also has his own powers since he, too, is a powerful mutant (which is what allowed him to control David). It’s unclear what the full extent of their powers are, since David only just got control of his and the Shadow King is still a bit mysterious. 

@kuroshitsuji fandom…

What if Soma gets shot and dies
But the Shinigamis spare his life seeing that he still has things to offer to the world

Remember how Agni said that he had grown a lot and he could do good things for his country

Shinigamis are allowed to let someone live if he has things to offer to the world

Even what grell said makes sense
He is going to appear and spare Soma’s life

Happy Birthday, nellyharrison!

March 26 - “Why are you looking at me like that?” WinterShieldQuake for @nellyharrison

“Can’t get through this door!” Tony yelled over the comms. “Dammit, it’s times like this I most miss the big green guy!”

Steve snorted. “All right, Tony, we’re on our way up,” though he wasn’t too sure what he and Bucky could do, if Iron Man hadn’t been able to blast the door open.

They were standing silently surveying the massive steel doors while the battle raged on behind them when a small brunette girl dressed in a SHIELD catsuit slipped in between them.

“Allow me,” she said politely, and placed two gauntleted hands on the doors, bowing her head in an almost prayerful attitude.

“What are you gonna do, pray them open?” Bucky said sarcastically.

Steve could feel a vibration building beneath his feet, the ground starting to tremor very slightly. He opened his mouth to ask what was happening… as the huge doors suddenly blew inwards, crashing to the ground.

“Not exactly,” the girl said to Bucky with a distinctly smug smirk.

“SHIELD are sending someone in who can blow the doors,” Tony said in Steve’s earpiece.

“She’s already done it,” Steve said faintly. He and Bucky were both staring at the girl in utter incredulity.

“Why are you looking at me like that? Don’t just stand there. We’ve got a Hydra base to wreck!” and she whirled on her heel and ran into the building.

“Who. Was. THAT?” Bucky breathed.

“I dunno, but she’s getting away. Come on!”

becoming a fag...part 3

I am not racist at all.  It makes me sick to say or do anything that might offend someone because of their race.  I wound up with a very steady, black client, who was only interested in me verbally abusing him while calling him racist names.  I stammered the first few times and he called a “time out”.  He said “Sir, it is not hurting me when you say these things, as I NEED to hear them.  The fact that you are having trouble doing it makes me trust you more.  I beg of you, please call me n&gger, n&gger bitch, and n%gger slave boy.  I crave it, and you are the one I want to do it.  No one else will know but us Sir.”  

After that he became my most steady. Sometimes 2x a day.  He was the first I allowed to rim me.  He was handsome and well built.  He smelled so good all of the time.  I still think of him when someone wears his cologne or oil, and I get a whiff of it.  He must have had some money, because the way he threw it at me, made my life a lot easier.  As a surprise for him, i bought a Joyrider.  A real rimchair.  It was pretty expensive for me, but I figured it would make him come back even more.  When he saw it set up the first time, he dropped to his knees and kissed my boots.  Literally a tear rolled down his cheek.  I don’t like tears as he knew from when I hit him with his belt several times, so he assured me this was a tear of happiness. 

  He asked if he could lay under it for a while before we began.  I thought this was weird but he wanted to just reflect on the kindness I was showing him.  I agreed and let him meditate under it for about 20 minutes.  I went to the buildings pool and swam a bit.  I trusted him completely because,  A-he had cleaned for me before while I went out, and B- I had NOTHING of value that he could steal.  The way he tossed cash at me I knew he didn’t need a thing from me but my time.  We had a long session that day as I sat on the chair he gently kissed my hole and told me what an amazing straight guy I was, and that he hadn’t met one like me before.  When he was leaving he remarked on how expensive the joyriders are.  (I think I paid like $500 or $600 but I honestly can’t remember.)  He gave me like $300 and we said our goodbye’s.  Less than 25 minutes later the manager of my building called me and said someone had dropped off an envelope for me, and it was in the office.  I had no clue what it was or who it was from.  I went down, and got it.  I came back up  to my small studio apartment (that i loved) and opened it.  It was a business size envelope.  A note and $700 was in it.  

The note said “For your kindness and consideration of me by getting the joyrider, I want to pay for it and for your time putting it together”.  Sincerely Your N&GGER.  I smirked as I thought to myself how crazy to be so excited about something that isn’t even yours.  

This rimchair has served me well.  These days it is not called a Joyrider or rimchair.  It is my Sirs throne and that is how He refers to it.  “Fag set my throne up, my ass will need soothing tonight”.  

The tables have turned.  #fag #sir #joyrider #rim #black #cash #money #race #straight #throne #owned #belt #boot #tear #faggot #lick #kiss #ass #asshole #smell #scent 

Shadowhunters AU where Simon gets tired of everyone making dismissive comments about his interest in DnD and convinces them to actually play it with him. 

  • He is a very patient DM
  • Alec plays a Ranger
  • Izzy rolls to seduce all their humanoid enemies
  • Jace tries to Rule of Cool literally everything, and then somehow actually has the rolls to pull it off
  • Clary is the only one with any charisma, and no one else is allowed to interact with NPCs anymore
  • They come up with the most ridiculous ways to kill monsters, and when Simon points out that they’re being extremely and unnecessarily extra, the response is always “but that’s how I would actually do it” which becomes an inside joke
  • Simon’s new catchphrase is “You know what? Sure.”