he is a big dumb thing

“Not only are there no happy endings…There aren’t even any endings.”

Every time I read American Gods by Neil Gaiman, I find more things to adore about this novel. I read it this time while traveling across the United States, and I have to say, something about reading this book in transit just makes sense. It makes even more sense reading it while soaring over America itself, gazing down on fields and hills, a New Jersey import who lives in Chicago, went to LA a week or so ago, and just left Florida. There is something so intensely American about this novel, and it wows me every time. From the smaller mythic chapters telling folk tales and stories of the people who brought their gods to America, to the gods themselves and their characters, this novel always gets me. This was my third time reading this novel, and I’m going to dig deep to highlight new things that I had forgotten, so solid warning: Spoilers ahead.

I will never get over the way that Neil Gaiman melds together the idea of the gods and the land, and gives them both their own power and will. Something that wows me that I often forget about the standalone is now astoundingly diverse it is without being appropriative, and how Gaiman incorporates so many cultures, a diverse range of characters, as well as a huge amount of humor without it becoming problematic. I think this novel could be a guidebook for authors who want to know how to write diverse stories and mythos respectfully. I forgot about so many fantastic characters that Gaiman pours himself into, from Samantha Black Crow to side characters that brim with energy and character themselves, like Whiskey Jack’s son or Bilquis. I also never noticed before the two mentions of Mr. Nancy’s son that point to Anansi Boys. Not to mention the wealth of research and knowledge that goes into the bottomless well of background characters and visions leading up to the battle. 

One thing I gained a new appreciation for in this novel was the character of Shadow. He is big, and not dumb, and I remembered all that, but what I forgot is how nice he is. Shadow’s such a cinnamon roll of a character, and I forget that. He stands up for a waitress and believes in the good of people. At the Lakeside library book sale, he tries to find the book that’s least likely to be purchased, so that he can help the library out by buying it. He performs coin tricks for children. He is obligated to hold Odin’s vigil, but he never questions whether he should also hold Mad Sweeney’s. As Laura speaks with the cutting, too-open words of the already-dead, Shadow still refuses to tell her about her appearance or to not hold her hand, because he doesn’t want to hurt her still. When Shadow picks up bodies with the coroners, he carries them always in his arms. 

The scene between Shadow and Odin before his death is one of my absolute favorites (other favorite scenes include Samantha Black Crow’s protest kiss, the scene in which Shadow thinks snow into being, and Shadow’s long death scene). Odin recites to Shadow what he knows—the charms, in a long list. And it ends with that long scene where Shadow wonders what would have happened if he touched Odin’s hand, and wishes he had. And Odin’s twisting grift of the fiddle is so complicated and well done that even on the third re-read, I find myself forgetting about it until the moment Odin dies, and doubting myself on it until the moment Shadow says it out loud.

@neil-gaiman’s American Gods just gets better every time I read it, and I am cautiously thrilled and excited for the show coming out later this spring. 

“It doesn’t matter that you didn’t believe in us. We believed in you.”

VanVen having an argument
  • Vanitas: *punches the wall near vens head in typical shippy/douchey fashion*
  • Ven: *loud gasp* :O
  • Vanitas:
  • Ven:
  • Ven: did
  • Ven: did you hurt yourself???
  • Vanitas: *pained noises*
  • Ven: *wrapping vanis hand up* YOURE SO STUPID
  • Vanitas: SHUT UP?? JUST SHUT UP??????

I hope Rap Monster finds someone who

  • can talk about music with him, your favorite songs and etc.
  • can go out with him for a night
  • goes on coffee shop dates
  • gets along with the other boys
  • gets along with his family
  • doesn’t listen to rumors
  • has a sense of humor
  • makes a playlist of all your favorite songs for him to listen too when he misses you
  • doesn’t mind when he’s always touching you in some way, like arm around your waist/holding hands
  • is there for him when hes feeling down
  • is a tea/coffee lover
  • loves alone time as much as being together
  • doesnt mind sharing him with fans
  • supports him because you know he supports you
  • night !! beach !!! walks !!
  • loves to go out and also be lazy
  • shows him new music
  • listens to his playlists even though they might not be your taste in music
  • remembers the little things about him
  • lets him have his alone time
  • lets him talk on and on about deep philosophical shit and dumb conversations
  • or even better, someone he can match up with these thoughts
  • listens to him when he talks
  • would hold him at night when he can’t sleep
  • can handle his dirty jokes
  • who has dreams and ambitions as big as his
  • who will be okay on their own when he’s on tour
  • but will also have their down days without him
  • reminds him how much you love him
  • can be loud and quiet
  • join his #KimDaily OOTD or be his photographer once in a while
  • talks him into going out more (even if it’s just to the store for food)

anonymous asked:

hey, could you explain what happened in Vegas betweet zayn and liam?

What happened? That’s a really good question.
Basically Zayn ignored Liam throughout the concert, AND THIS IS SOMETHING because Zayn never ignores Liam.

Look at the other concerts

But in Vegas something happened. Zayn didn’t touch Liam, he didn’t even try to look in his direction despite Liam’s pleading eyes. (How did he even manage to resist those puppy eyes?)

So yeah, Zayn was angry. And he was angry with Liam, ‘cause he behaved normally with the other three boys.

Did Liam do something wrong? Maybe, we can’t know for sure, but that same morning Liam and Zayn were fine at the meet and greet.
Though during the day something clearly irritated Zayn and he ended up arguing with Paul.

(btw he’s being cornered by two big guys, that’s only my supposition, but I think they were trying to stop him from doing something dumb, trying to reason with him, even if he didn’t want to)
Anyway he was so upset that he skipped dinner while the other boys went to Gordon Ramsay’s steakhouse

When the concert started Zayn was still upset, he tried to behave normally with the others, but totally ignored Liam.
Also, the weird thing is that his hand was perfectly fine at the beginning of the day, but

again, what happened? Did he punch something? Someone? We’ll never know (ugh)

So, the interesting point which connects everything is that Danielle was there.
Our guess is that nobody expected this, or at least Zayn didn’t expect to find her there. Maybe it was a last moment decision or maybe he was the only one who didn’t know that and didn’t take the news very well.

(I swear I can picture him softly punching Liam and yelling: WHAT DOES SHE DO HERE? WHY IS SHE HERE?) (it’s no secret that Zayn clearly didn’t like her)

Anyhow the boys knew what was going on, and they tried to fix it, changing their usual position and making Zayn and Liam squeeze against each other

wow, good plan guys, how evil

but you failed

Anyway, Zayn and Liam clarified (maybe that same night after sending away Danielle) and the day after everything was fine.

Overprotective

Drabble Prompt: “I have stabbed people with these heels before and I’m not afraid to do it again, so I would suggest not pissing me off.“ 

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Requested by: @x-x-owrooh-x-x


“What’s up, Sammy?” Dean greets, answering his phone as he cruises down the highway in Baby.

“Hey, man. I need to take a rain check. We got a break in the case so I’m gonna be at the station for a while.”

“That sucks.” Dean whines. “What am I supposed to do now?”

“Uh go home?” Sam suggests chuckling.

“I can’t. Y/N is having a girls night with Charlie. She made me promise to stay away. I planned on crashing at your place after the bar.”

Keep reading

i don’t know how likely it is that the video dan was talking about will be a coming out video, but it makes sense considering his views on sexuality, especially in current years. he’s gone on a number of rants about it not being important to self identify and how societies obsession with labels is dumb, but also hasn’t tried to hide his attraction to boys and mentioned how important it is for representation in the media. it makes sense for him to make a video about his experiences with crushes on boys or something like that rather than a serious ‘here’s how i identify’ video. if he decides to do this, i’ll be really proud of him for not only using his name to represent the lgbt+ community, but for just being open with himself too

anonymous asked:

Holy shit I love your analysis' of Jimin and Namjoon!! Would you mind doing one for Jungkook as well? I know a lot of people were confused as to why Namjoon put him in Ravenclaw over Gryffindor/Slytherin.

Hello~

It’s really weird for me that you guys actually care about and value my opinions  on this whole business so thank you so much for giving my ramblings the time of day omg

for those who are wondering about my thoughts on gryffindor!namjoon and slytherin!jimin here’s the links to those:

Namjoon as a Gryffindor || Jimin as a Slytherin


So like, I really. really. really. love the idea of Ravenclaw Jeon. (But listen… I used to be a hardcore Slytherin!Jeon person okay, so I understand your feels on this. I do.) 

 here goes nothing

Ravenclaw Jungkook confused a lot of people. And I really get it because Ravenclaw was so fucking shafted in the books. 

We had so many Gryffindors and Slytherins to relate to, and we had a fair share of badass Hufflepuffs (TONKS) to base our opinions off of. But there were only a few Ravenclaws that were given the time of day in the books, and only one of those was a major character. We had Luna, Trelawney, Lockehart, and Cho. Cho’s amazing character was wasted by JK – she was written with the personality of a dish rag and didn’t really get the spotlight she deserved. Trelawney was presented as a crazy old lady who sometimes ?? served a purpose. Lockehart was an idiot. All we really had was Luna.

But it wasn’t just the characters. Ravenclaw has a really weird reputation. Before I wrote this, I asked a bunch of my casual and hardcore HP fan friends to tell me the characteristics they associated with each house. And I got pretty much what I expected:

  • Gryffindor: Leaders, brave, courageous, brash, strong
  • Slytherin: Cunning, resourceful, calculating, perfectionists
  • Hufflepuff: Loyal, kind, hard-working, determination, cheerful
  • Ravenclaw: Smart…?? they are… smart people?? They do things…….smartly……

Like for real. Whenever I asked people what traits they associated with Ravenclaw, all anyone was ever able to tell me was that Ravenclaws were supposedly smart. And that’s got a lot to do with the fact that when the sorting hat sings off about all the houses, it lists all these great traits for the other houses, but when it comes to Ravenclaw it says this:

Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,
If you’ve a ready mind,
Where those of wit and learning,
Will always find their kind.

And then the books go on to say that Ravenclaws are,

characterised by their wit, intelligence, and wisdom.

So maybe you’re like me, and I am REALLY guilty of this, but when I first read this in the books I kinda just thought these all meant the same thing. So maybe that’s where we got this idea that all Ravenclaws are good for are being smart.

But it wasn’t until I looked up the actual definition of each word that I realized these were all saying really different things:

Intelligence - the ability to acquire and apply knowledge and skills.
Wit - a natural aptitude for using words and ideas in a quick and inventive way to create humor.
Wisdom - the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment; the quality of being wise.

^^^^this is just webster dictionary definitions here. The bolded words are the ones I want to focus on.

Skill. See – Ravenclaws are supposedly smart. But this doesn’t always have to mean BOOKSMART, and I think that’s where we had a lot of trouble with Jeon. No one is saying he is dumb or anything, but he’s no Namjoon.

Notable examples of this trait include Lockehart, who was pretty shitty at a lot of things, but had the street smarts enough to pass off his big whole scam for years and years, and was especially gifted in certain charms.

Then there’s Luna, who while shown to be really good at solving riddles, was also portrayed as really physically skilled. In Dumbledore’s Army, while being taught how to conjure a Patronus by Harry, Luna was the first to get it right. She was fourteen at the time, and was such a skilled witch that she was able to perform an incredibly difficult charm - that even adults had trouble with - after like…….mere minutes of teaching.

Does this sound like someone you know?? I’ll give you an example: Observe this VERY determined Hufflepuff not give up on his dreams and finally have all his hard work pay off… only for someone to come in and get it right almost instantly.

Or maybe… “Hey guys, this dance move you made up looks pretty cool – mind if I watch you do it like once and a half and then nail it instantly?”

And if you’re ever in doubt about just how skilled Jungkook is… remember that he turned down seven other agencies to join BigHit. That’s how many people were after him and recognized his talent. (This also ties in to my thoughts on the part about good judgement – Jungkook obviously saw a lot of potential in Namjoon and BigHit in general, so much so that he turned down tons of other companies to be there. He saw something a lot of other people did not… and it ended up being the best decision he ever made.)

But I think another really telling aspect of Jungkook’s Ravenclaw personality is that he isn’t always perfect at everything. He’s not always good at something right away – but that won’t stop him working really hard to get good

In Rookie King he was shown to be at the most pretty average at bowling. He wasn’t terrible, but he was about as good as you and I would be after playing a few rounds with a little luck. Well, Golden Maknae Jungkook could not stand to not be the best at something, so he mentions sometime later (13:10) that he’s hired a coach to teach him how to bowl…. and then just a few months later uploads a video of himself getting a strike like it’s no god damn big deal at all. And he looks pretty proud of himself too.

But all the major Ravenclaws were also shown time and time and time again as being a little…. scatterbrained. Luna, Lockehart, and Trelawney especially, and to an extent even Cho. And Jungkook is no exception. He’s… pretty gullible. And DEFINITELY scatterbrained.

But wit, intelligence, and wisdom are not the only three traits associated with Ravenclaw. There are a lot of other traits you may not really know about, because again – Ravenclaws were woefully under-represented in the series. There’s quite a few others listed for this house:

  • Creative
  • Individuality
  • Eccentric
  • Quirky
  • Jealousy/Envy
  • Competitive

So imma just go down the list because I’m really tired and I can’t made good word things rn

Creative

it’s no secret that Jungkook is a pretty talented artist. He’s a pretty damn good photographer too. (This will always be one of my favorite photos ever of Jimin – and Jungkook took it.) And he’s a talented lyricist as well. He’s an extremely good dancer and has a beautiful voice too – but you guys know this already.

Individuality

Take a look at how he expresses his individuality through his song covers.

Eccentric & Quirky

You guys thought the fact that Lockehart, Trelawney, and even heckin Luna were all in the same house was a coincidence? Ravenclaws are NOTORIOUS for being Extra™ . I’m not kidding! This is literally a personality trait of Ravenclaws that we overlook so often from these weirdos. And Jeon fuckin Jungkook invented the word eccentric:


you’d be here forever if i kept going so… you get the point. eccentric is jungkook’s middle name.

Jealousy/Envy

Jeonlous exists in this god forsaken fandom, and I ain’t gonna link it and open THAT can of worms, but if you’re feeling so inclined and care to enter the seventh circle of hell, feel free to look it up… but tread carefully.

Competitive

When I got the first ask about Ravenclaw Kook I had woken up at 3am and sleepily looked at my emails. I saw the ask and immediately had to jot down my ideas to keep for the next day, and all I managed to write in my sleep stupor was this

and then i promptly fell back asleep.

I was referring to this, and if you don’t feel bad for poor Jin in this situation I don’t know what to tell you. Jungkook is intensely competitive, even over small things like board games. He was so intent on winning that game that he literally assaulted someone five years his senior to sabotage them.

And then this is him trying to win a dance-off… doing the most, as usual.

And also?? He was literally banned from the gym because he was getting too buff. And look at him take out that guy in wrestling… and then demolish poor Jimin, the smallest member of BTS in arm wrestling when he could have… you know… let him win or something……

It’s a pretty well known meme within the fandom that Jungkook is competitive and always trying to outdo the others.



But when it comes down to it, Ravenclaws are still known for being smart, right? We can take all these other traits and apply them to Jeon but what about his brain?

He’s actually kinda smart. He is able to cover a song in perfect English even though he doesn’t speak the language all that well (but well enough to constantly correct others’ English and he’s good enough to tell you he’s really not all that interested in participating in English Time anyways)

And I mean…. he can outsmart the other members pretty well…………..


But I think one of the most important things to note about Jungkook being in Ravenclaw is to look at who sorted him, Namjoon: Namjoon himself gave Jungkook the nickname “Golden Maknae”. He is constantly saying that Jungkook can do anything, or watch this Jungkook can do this, or wow look at him go, or he’s so talented this and that. Is it really any surprise that Namjoon would put Jungkook in to a house known for being highly skilled when he believes no less of the kid?

Jungkook has some pretty Slytherin-like qualities – but tons of canon HP characters and the BTS members themselves have traits that are shared by all four houses. It’s just a matter of where he fits best.

I mean TL;DR, Jeon says it best himself:

gif credit: bwiskook

in 140 characters or less: isak+even

even discovers a new meme, much to isak’s dismay.

They do this thing where–and Isak will forever deny that he started it–everything that happens in their relationship, from the small things to the big ones, becomes a hashtag. Like, for example:

#WhenYou’veFoundTheManofYourDreams and he hasn’t washed his duvet in weeks,” or

#WhenYou’veFoundTheManofYourDreams and he has a backup sandwich for you in his bag when you forget yours at home,” or

#WhenYou’veFoundTheManofYourDreams and he doesn’t judge you for your taste in ‘chick flicks’, because he secretly enjoys them as much as you do,” and

#WhenYou’veFoundTheManofYourDreams and he’s funny, and sweet, and so understanding, and probably so much more than you deserve but he’s stood by your side for four months now so yeah anyway here’s this dumb mixtape Jonas said you’d like–”

Sappy shit like that, basically.

But one evening, when they’re buzzed and warm and Isak’s watching Even scroll through his phone with his chin perched on his shoulder, Even creates a new one.

Keep reading

FIC RECS

in honor of gaining another hundred followers on my twitter account @getsterREKT heres another rec list. 

This will just be made up of lots and lots of different types of fics. Make sure to read the warnings for each fic before reading. 

(fics with ** are favorites)


It Takes A Village by  Hypocorismm

Stiles’s used to yogurt handprints on his shirts from where he picked her up, and he’s used to snot on his shoulders and neck from where she cried after a bad dream. He’s used to her legendary tantrums when she doesn’t get her way, her eyes glowing ferocious gold. He’s used to being the village it takes to raise her, and the pack she longs for.

Except, he needs the pack’s help, and Derek’s protection when a particularly power-hungry pack wants his cub. And he isn’t used to sharing.

WORDS: 49227

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 35/35

WARNINGS: angst, kidnapping, mpreg.


Night Stroll by  Marishna

“Is it night there?”

Derek chuckled. “Yeah, it is. How do you know where I am?”

“I don’t, that’s why it’s weird it’s night. That puts you in… Europe?” Stiles asked after some quick math.

Derek raised an eyebrow. “Spain. You haven’t lost that…” Derek waved his hand. “Stileness.”

WORDS: 3276

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTER: 1/1

WARNINGS: derek has insomnia??? is that a warning??? idk


****Prince Among Wolves by  tylerfucklin (Deshonanana)

Looking for full day/evening sitter. 2 twin boys age 4. Must have exp. w/werewolves. Must be human. No pedophiles. No teenage girls. Pay negotiable. 

WORDS: 101,000

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 20/20

WARNINGS: mild transphobia, derek learns acceptance, broken family, so much angst


Walking Into Darkness by  alenie

Derek hears Stiles before he sees him. There’s anxious, wheezy breathing coming from the next aisle over in the grocery store, accompanied by a racing heart and the smell of unwashed sneakers and hair gel. He turns the corner and Stiles is standing frozen in the dairy aisle, knuckles clenched around the metal of his shopping basket.

WORDS: 6342

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: panic attacks, anxiety, depression, post 3b, pre-sterek relationship 


****Ashes, Ashes by  ShanaStoryteller

The Sheriff gets a call at work - someone’s tried to burn down his home with his son inside.

“I thought of you coming here, and finding me dead, of another burnt out husk of a body, something else fire has stolen from you, of you having nothing left to grasp but ashes,” John can’t even call that a whimper, it’s clearly a whine as Derek’s hands tighten against Stile’s hips, as if his boy will shudder to dust at the mere mention of the possibility unless Derek’s hands can hold him into one piece, “and that thought was worse than dying.”

WORDS: 2699

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS:1/1

WARNINGS: so much angst, stiles nearly burns to death


Just Realize What I Just Realized by  literaryoblivion

He’s never noticed it before; it’s always just been second nature to him these days, does it out of habit, but it’s not until he stops to actually think about it that it becomes abundantly and embarrassingly clear to him that he is in love with Stiles and that they are practically dating without the actual dating part…

WORDS: 2529

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: a lil angst, (but mostly fluff)


The Potential Fatality of Assuming by  crossroadswrite

The hair, the buttons and the general happy and slightly tired disposition with which Derek came back from his secret exploits were as obvious as a glaring neon sign flashing the words JUST GOT LAID.

A sign that Stiles ignored because he had a seven year plan god damn it.

(OR: in which Stiles assumes things, gets accosted by the sister he never/always wanted, discovers he was horribly wrong, almost dies via Derek Hale with kids, can’t handle all that collarbone action, uses tickling as the ultimate mode of revenge, and gets a boyfriend. In that order.)

WORDS: 2196

RATING: General

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: misunderstandings, because stiles is dumb, lots of pining


****If I Could Trade Mistakes For Sheep, Count Me Away Before You Sleep by  alisaj

“Thing is, Stiles,” Derek says, his voice hard and unfaltering. “I didn’t sign up for you. You just hung around until we got used to you being here.”

That stings. He hadn’t realised how Derek feels about him. They’ve been getting on quite well, teaming up on little missions and bantering back and forth without malice. Stiles sometimes lets Derek crash in his room after a big fight, trying not to let on how intriguing he finds the werewolf.

“Well now we can get used to you not being here. You’re a liability, Stilinski. You can’t protect yourself and we always end up having to help you when we’ve got more important things to do. You’re out of the pack.”

or

The one where Derek is a terrible Alpha and Stiles ends up walking into a big pile of shit.

WORDS: 33,383

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: stiles gets kicked out of the pack, derek is stupid, like, so stupid, stiles gets hurt, theres so much angst in this like wtf, stiles is sad, the pack sucks


Sour Kush (series) by alisvolatpropiis

Stiles mentally curses Erica, because in all of her warnings about how brusque this guy could be, she forgot mention that he’s also hotter than the fucking sun. If Stiles had any lingering questions about his sexuality, they’d be completely settled by what this guy is doing to him. In fact, he might not even be gay anymore. He might be in the midst of crossing into some yet-to-be-named sexuality that’s all about a scruffy black beard and alarming green eyes and muscles and tattoos and this guy’s everything ever.

The guy’s name is Derek, his lust-addled brain supplies distantly.

Well that settles it, then. Stiles is Dereksexual.

WORKS: 3

COMPLETE: it says no but they havent updated in like over 2 years so im guessing its done

WORDS: 15,392

RATING: Explict 

WARNINGS: everyone is stoned all the time, also in work 2 stiles is hurt because he thinks derek is getting it on with parrish, they’re dumb, age difference, derek has a beardddd 


I Just Want You For My Own (More Than You Could Ever Know) by  yodasyoyo

“What is with that sweater, dude?”

Derek ducks his head to look at it, abashed. “Uh- Mrs Hernandez knitted it for me. It’s an early Christmas gift.” He smooths it down self-consciously.

Stiles cocks an eyebrow.

“What? She’s my neighbor and sometimes I-” Derek trails off. Stiles’ other eyebrow rises to join the first, and Derek sighs. “Sometimes I help her carry her shopping.”

Of course he does. One day maybe Stiles will stop being in love with Derek Hale, but today is not that day.

WORDS: 16,065

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS: 4/4

WARNINGS: pining, fake relationships, they’re both idiots. 


Baby You’re Beautiful by  supernaynay

“God you’re beautiful.”

Derek hadn’t even realized that the words had left his mouth until the whole room went silent, including Stiles, who until about five seconds earlier was busy yelling at him for putting himself in danger yet again.

WORDS: 1089

RATING: General

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: derek is hit with a truth spell


****(Sacred) In The Ordinary by  idyll

The Pack, after college, graduate school and the starting of careers, comes back to Beacon Hills. Nothing’s gotten less complicated after all this time.

Based on a kink meme prompt that grew legs and got serious.

Note: This is a whole lot of pack!fic with a very slow build Derek/Stiles.

WORDS: 78,759

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 9/9

WARNINGS: violence, slow build


Cause I Built a Home (For You, For Me) by  noneedforhystereks

Mechanic!Derek and Daddy!Stiles

Derek Hale is a mechanic in the sleepy town of Beacon Hills, where he has lived all of his life. He spends his day in a simple routine: wake up, fix cars, go home, sleep. It’s what he’s good at, and it keeps things simple and uncomplicated. Derek doesn’t let people in and remains emotionally distant from everyone except his sister, Laura, and her daughter. This all changes when Boyd tows in an old blue Jeep that needs a lot of work and Derek meets the owner of said Jeep.

Because once Derek meets Stiles and his kids, he can’t stop himself from caring. And he doesn’t want to stop.

WORDS: 59,719

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 15/15

WARNINGS: angst, pining, emotional hurt, stiles has a lot of baggage. 


Waiting For Our Superman by  tearsandholdme

Derek knew the moment he opened the front door of his clean and pristine apartment to Stiles Stilinski holding a small boy, a cluster of bags, and a suitcase, he was screwed. In every way possible. Undone by the big brown eyes of a small child and his annoying, witty, and attractive father.

WORDS: 95,240

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 22/22

WARNINGS: angst, mpreg, emotional hurt, overprotective derek


Adding You to My Future by  NekoIzumi

“So, I’m Stiles.” he smiled warmly once he had put his unannounced patient down on the exam table. “I will poke and prod you a little bit to check for internal injuries, those that I can’t see because they’re inside you, and some of it might hurt but it will pass, I promise. I will tell you everything I’m about to do and why I’m doing it so just stay calm and this will go like a breeze, okay?”

Now, Stiles wasn’t stupid in any way, shape or form, he knew a were when he saw one… although he had obviously never seen a werecat before, and definitely not one as young as this one.

WORDS: 42,252

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS:9/9

WARNINGS: violence, like, lots of violence, slow build, gore, emotional comfort, bamf stiles


Stars Plummet: a Christmas Story by  Peckishdragon

When Stiles left Beacon Hills, he never thought he would be coming back. Eight years later, he is coming home for Christmas, with a small passenger in tow. Old feelings, never forgotten, are rekindled.

WORDS: 11,589

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 6/6

WARNINGS: a lil violence, like a tiny bit, 


All They Have by  Nival_Vixen

Single dads AU where Derek and Stiles meet because Derek’s daughter and Stiles’ trans son become friends at school.

WORDS: 4004

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: trans child, which leads to ignorant adults being ugly fucks, protective derek 


love comes in all shapes and sizes by  trilliastra

“Daddy says that when I’m in trouble I should get the police because they always help us. You’re going to help me, right?” Stiles smiles at her, happy that today he decided to stop by the grocery store to buy milk after his shift instead of going straight home. At least now he’s able to help the little girl, who knows what would have happened to her if he weren’t around.

“Of course I will.” He smiles again. “What’s your name?”

“Rebecca Hale.” She answers proudly. “My daddy is Derek Hale.”

WORDS: 2207

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: kate argent


When You Wish Upon a Dragon by  lupinus

Stiles is at the Hale house, lounging on the front stoop watching Isaac, Erica, and Boyd wrestle, when the baby comes running out of the woods.
Derek becomes instant father to a magically appearing baby and falls in love. Stiles can’t take the cute and worries Derek’s heart will break if he loses the kid. 

or, a dragon gives derek a baby, stiles is oblivious, steve just loves his bright pink rocking unicorn and his da and ma 

WORDS: 13,739

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: none, but so much fluff


****Lucky That I’m Yours Every Day by  stilinskisparkles

Derek doesn’t see how Valentine’s Day can get any better than a normal day with Stiles.

WORDS: 6772

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: fluff. just. all the fluff. its disgusting how fluffy it is really.


Relationship Status: It’s Complicated by  kellifer_fic

Okay, I know this is a huge stretch for you, but can you please pretend you’re like, into me?

WORDS: 4010

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNING: mentioned stiles/omc 


***************Shot Through The Heart by  LunaCanisLupus_22

All they’ve given him is the guy’s head shot. And it’s terrible because now he is ridding the world of one more ridiculously attractive, instant pants dropping- take me now, if you please- regulation hottie.

Even if he has a scowl to rival Kirsten Stewart.

Or the one when Stiles and Derek work for rival assassin companies and are sent to kill each other. It definitely doesn’t go as planned.

WORDS: 64,833

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 12/12

WARNINGS: so much violence, they literally try to kill eachother, enemies to lovers pretty much


will to follow through by  owlpostagain

“It depends entirely on how you look at it, I guess,” Stiles shrugs. “On the one hand, instant healing and the apparently inherited ability to pull off leather at all times. On the other, serious attitude problems and a suspicious disappearance of eyebrows.”

“Even Derek’s?” Danny snorts, “that’s a lot of eyebrow to lose.”

“I know,” Stiles agrees. “You should see, it’s so weird. Every time I want to ask him where they go, except he’d totally eat my face off.”

“There are worse ways to die.”

WORDS: 42,411

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 2/2

WARNINGS: angst, mentions of violence, 


Professor D. Hale (series) by  har1ey_quinn


A series of outsider POVs on Professor Hale and his significant other (with some guest appearances from the pack)

WORKS: 7

COMPLETE: possibly

WORDS: 18,008

RATING: Teen and Up

WARNINGS: none


go on without me!!!! (or the one where stiles is cursed by witches and overreacts to everything) by  day

Stiles is cursed by witches and he can’t react like a normal human being.
Scott is a terrible best friend and can’t stop laughing.
Derek just wants it all to be over.

WORDS: 1396

RATING: General

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: crack


******For My Next Trick, I’ll Regret All of My Life Choices: a performance by Derek Hale and 80% of his eyebrows by  crossroadswrite

(978): I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
.
“What’s wrong with my eyebrows?”

Kira gives him a sympathetic look, and climbs up to sit next to him, “You kind of… don’t have one.”

“I what!” he shouts, wincing at the volume of his own voice.

Kira pats him on the shoulder and shoves a piece of toast in his hand.

“It’s not that bad,” she tries to console him with a smile, then glances up at his left eyebrow and winces, “It could definitely be worse. It’s not all gone. Just. Half of it.”

Derek considers crying into his orange juice but decides that would be a waste and because his mother taught him how to be a good guest he opts to drink it instead.

WORDS: 2566

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: none buT THIS FIC IS AN ALL TIME FAV, THE FUCKING SQUIRRELS VIKING BURIAL GETs ME EVERYTIME, AND BATMAN OH MY

Comforting a Significant Other in Pain

Noctis:

  • knows a thing or two about all degrees of pain
  • drops whatever he was doing, asks you what you need and then helps you get it
  • will probably hug and kiss you in bed and won’t mind marathoning your favorite show while ordering takeout for as long as you need
  • calls the royal healer to see if there’s anything they can do to manage the pain, even if you’re not technically covered by their royal insurance 😂
  • urges you to sleep it off and stays under the covers with you
  • you hear the shake in his voice when he feels helpless to help you, you tell him you’ll be okay and start believing it just a little bit yourself
  • he’ll casually say something like ‘it’s amazing how you just power through it!’ and it cheers you up immensely to be praised by the prince of pain himself

Prompto:

  • has a very low threshold, so anybody who can function at all while in any kind of pain is a living legend in his book
  • will give you big watery eyes when you finally admit that it’s too much and instantly hold your hands and comfort you
  • sits in the waiting room with his hand in yours the whole time, threading his fingers between yours and squeezing occasionally
  • every time the nurse asks for paperwork or identification he’s the first to jump and get it done so you don’t have to
  • lets you go through the photos in his phone or camera to keep your mind off unpleasant things, starts sending you dumb memes when you’ve seen all the pictures, it’s both inappropriate and endearing
  • every time he leaves the house he comes back with your favorite ice cream and snacks, and that one time with a box of kittens he picked up from the side of the road
  • will rub you if it makes you feel better, if not he’ll cling really close every day and help you with meals and getting dressed until you start feeling better

Ignis: 

  • goes into aggressive mom mode
  • cooks all your meals, washes your laundry, keeps a schedule of your meds, tells you to stop worrying about work or homework
  • has dealt with Noctis’s chronic pains, and learned the importance of deciding when to hover and when to give you space
  • will be lenient on things he usually chastises you for, like eating only your favorite meals, or playing video games on the couch for six hours straight
  • “whatever helps you through it, darling” he’ll offer any form of affection if you can take it, and remains within arm’s reach the whole time
  • helps take your mind off by changing things around the house, mainly the lighting and scents, and will encourage you to clean up and get dressed if it helps you feel more put together
  • refuses to leave the house with you in pain, all his work is postponed or moved to his personal laptop so he can be near you while getting it done
  • when you start recovering he will bring you flowers and tell you how amazing you are for overcoming such a difficult foe

Gladio: 

  • has no idea what to do at first, so he’ll ask you about your condition and what he can do to help with the most serious face
  • takes your pain very seriously and fusses over it more than you allow yourself to
  • absolutely will not let you carry anything heavy or aggravate your sore spots, if you try to get any housework done he will physically put you back in bed so you can rest
  • once he’s less obsessed with protecting you, will let you help him make the meals and will seat you on his person while watching tv
  • he’s really warm and gives very good rubs, if heat and massages help he will do it all day for you
  • his eyes water when your pain flares up, it kills him not to be able to fix it himself, but it pushes him to read a lot and educate himself on your perspective of the reoccurring pain
  • constantly asks you if you’re comfortable, if you need anything, if he can do anything to help, if your doctor is doing their job etc
  • plays king’s knight with you to take your mind off he pain, or reads you the current pages of his novels so you can fall asleep to his voice

as per @yourscientistfriend request! (pls start feeling better ;-; )

over the moon

dad!Yoongi
a/n: surprise! my therapy is going well so i wrote this!! why cant I stop writing Yoongi fluff? ): he makes me so soft. also this gif/outfit is very dad!yoongi don’t you think?

Originally posted by yoongichii

Yoongi was a highly intolerable person to be around. He was grouchy, precise about his work, wasn’t fond of people waking him up before three in the afternoon, didn’t like animals or small children, or people in general for that matter —however, all of that had changed when he met you. Don’t misunderstand, he was still a relatively prickly guy to be around, pretty much the only thing that had changed was your involvement to his life, even his friends had a hard time understanding what he had done to warrant your addition.

To Yoongi, the two of you were polar opposites, he was brash and blunt where you shied away from hurting people’s feelings, instead preferring to comfort and console —your field of expertise. He was hard where you were soft, cold where you warm, selfish where you were all too giving (something that annoyed the living shit out of him at times). And to his complete and utter surprise, and the surprise of literally everyone around him, it was you who had pursued him. An agonizing six months of insults and rejections hadn’t put off your warm smiles or offers for coffee and tea, your treat, until he had finally relented, deciding the best way to get rid of the annoying girl who kept showing up to his job and asking him out was to actually go out with her and be an ass —a simple feat really, all he had to do was be himself.

Only he hadn’t anticipated falling in love with you, or your moony eyes, or the way you stupidly seemed to always space out at the most inconvenient of times like at crosswalks to do the most unnecessary things like stare at a big star, which he had pointed out was not in fact a star it was probably a satellite because you two were in the city. Later that night he would convince himself he had grabbed your hand out of sheer obligation, so you wouldn’t get hit by a stupid car and he wouldn’t have to spend his night at the ER instead of watching Castle reruns and not because of the way your dumb face had lit up like a thousand Christmas lights just ‘cause he had grabbed your hand to pull you out of traffic.

Two days later he had decided he would take you out on another date because he couldn’t possibly let someone with so many stars in their eyes wander around the cruel streets of Seoul by themselves, you would probably take two wrong turns and get eaten by a shark or something. And it was definitely not because he liked you or the way you couldn’t stop staring at him when he talked about music or how you were so soft and pliable, or the way you had told him that Hawaii couldn’t be an island and a state it had to pick one. No, it was just his civil duty, he was too altruistic for his own good.

Three and half years later he had begrudgingly shoved a black velvet box in your hand, and it wasn’t because he liked you or anything it was only because it was too late to turn back now and he would look like a major ass if he like broke up with you this far down the road, and you were totally in love with him, because he had that affect on people (he had told you so too). To which you giggled and wiped at a stray tear asking if he would include that in his wedding vows. 

It definitely was not because he was so desperately in love with you it almost hurt and the thought of not having you binded to him even by some stupid court document when you possessed every piece of his heart and soul made it hard to sleep at night and sometimes he would stay awake just to watch you sleep and that was saying a lot because he loved sleep more than anything but now he loved you more than anything. And it’s not that he thought that you would leave him because, hey, if you didn’t realize how much of an ass he was by now, there was no hope for you, but because you deserved the world and then some and some stupid big fancy wedding with an ugly cake and people fawning over the two of you even if Yoongi hated it and kept tugging at his tie because it was choking him….. and that still wasn’t enough. 

And he had drunkenly told you so on your honey moon, as you stood before, cheeks flushed and looking like a fucking a fairy, he couldn’t help but spill over, pouring out years worth of affection. He told you it wasn’t enough, not for the girl who had come into his life like a whirlwind, who he thought hung the moon and stars for him every fucking night, who made his heart balloon, who made him feel, just feel so much at once his entire being felt like it was vibrating with the sheer amount of energy. It would never be enough, but he wouldn’t stop until it was, he would never stop loving you until he met you at the top of the moon. You grinned at him like an idiot, because there was no response that was not of the physical nature that would be suitable. 

Two years later he was here, in a grocery store looking very domestic as you wandered down some aisle doing God knows what and he muttered obscenities to his otherwise incapacitated passengers.

“Oh! Look at how precious they are!”

Min Yoongi was a highly intolerable person to be around. He was grouchy, precise about his work, wasn’t fond of people waking him up before three in the afternoon, and he hated when people crowded his children —

Yoongi blinked expectantly at the middle aged woman preening over the carrier, leaning in far too close for his liking, so close her obnoxiously scented perfume was choking him and he felt his blood pressure spike to an unreasonably high level. He cleared his throat, sending her a curt nod, to which she chose to ignore, instead taking it upon herself to rub a filthy hand over his child’s cheek. Min Yoongi reached in the baby bag for pocket bac—

“Babe?” Your voice caused a sense of euphoria he wasn’t yet willing to admit to and you smiled softly, “I was looking for you.”

You took note of Yoongi, who was so tense, you were sure if he were a cat his hackles would be risen and frowned in concern. All it took was one look at the woman with copious amounts of makeup leaning over the baby carrier to put two and two together. You sighed in understanding before letting out a tinkling laugh at his grimace. 

You rubbed a hand soothingly over the small of his back and he loosened his muscles, leaning into your touch begrudgingly. He was always so grumpy.

“Are they twins?” The woman cooed and you didn’t miss the way Yoongi was currently disinfecting one of your children as you bit back a laugh.

“Triplets actually. I’m the third.” He sneered and you pinched his side so hard he actually yelped.

The woman coughed uncomfortably before smiling at you, a smudge of red lipstick staining her teeth, “You have a beautiful family.”

“Thank you.” You smiled, rubbing a hand over your already protruding stomach.

“They’re alright.” He shrugged and you narrowed your eyes at him.

“Your husband has a very peculiar sense of humor.” She laughed awkwardly, but you were so used to Yoongi’s brash personality by now that you just sighed and waited.

“Husband? Oh no, I’m her brother.” He began.

You felt a hand on the back of your neck and you glanced up to see Yoongi staring at you with that look in his eye that meant—

He was kissing you, far too deeply, and far too passionately for broad daylight and in the middle of the feminine hygiene aisle at a grocery store, but you didn’t pull back because it was Yoongi and he was sweet. He tasted like mint gum and the Strawberry Apple baby puffs that he insisted he wasn’t sneaking when you weren’t looking and you felt a grin split your lips at the thought. There was distant mutterings of an excuse from Yoongi’s earlier companion but all you were focused on was the gentle way his thumbs coursed over your cheeks, and how as the kiss came to a close he kept placing gentle pecks against your own lips like he wasn’t ready to separate yet.

So as you took in your husband of going on two years, your partner of longer, the father of your children, Min Yoongi, in his black dad cap and distressed jeans with a baby bag strapped over chest and sporting a cat got the canary expression at you, you couldn’t help but grin. His actions were always so contradictory to his words, it was what made you fall in love with him all those years ago when you were but teens and he was working at a tech store. Min Yoongi was brash and blunt, could sometimes be cold but when it came to you and when it came to his children he was unbelievably soft hearted.

“Let’s go pay.” He sighed, gripping your hand, while using the other to steer the baby carrier, “Did you remember to pick up your prenatal pills?”

“Yes Yoongi.” You murmured.

“How about Gatorade,” he muttered, “the doctor said that you were getting dehydrated a lot quicker during this term.”

“Yes Yoongi.” You smiled to yourself.

“And don’t forget—”

You leaned up on your toes to press a peck on his check, “I love you, Yoongi.”

He froze for a moment, hating the way he cheeks flushed like a teenager as though he hadn’t just made out with you five minutes ago. He glared at you, “Let’s go home.”

anonymous asked:

If you're still doing the headcanon thing, what about adrinino with Adrien recently coming out as trans?

  • Nino initially assumes the new girl is into him from how much time she spends studying every little thing he does, although he is mildly baffled as to WHY when she is a Literal Model. Then one day she gets all quiet and asks him to call her “Adrien, please” and he realizes that yeah, no, HE was studying every little thing he does that much because he wanted to put it into PRACTICE one day. Considering the only other two dudes Adrien spends a lot of time with are his dad and the Gorilla, Nino does not blame him for picking a different role model. Adrien’s posture is stiffer than his and he’s a lot more nervous and awkward, but Nino does not care, Nino is now in possession of a Bro For Life and he is gonna make that VERY CLEAR to LITERALLY EVERYONE. THIS IS HIS BRO, HIS DUDE, HIS MAN, HIS BROTHER
  • (Chloe is of a similar mindset, and immediately begins aggressively hitting on Adrien all the time, going out of her way to call him “Adrikins” at every given opportunity, and making it VERY CLEAR to EVERYONE EVER how INCREDIBLY SUPERIOR a male specimen he is, no other dude stands a CHANCE with her they are all SCRUBS next to *~ADRIEN~*. Adrien is simultaneously happy that she’s so supportive and mORTIFIED that she’s so supportive. There may be some frequent hiding behind Nino. Like. Very frequent.) 
  • Nino gets saved by Chat Noir one day in a VERY up close and personal way and can’t help kind of recognizing that funny restricted breathing pattern. How do you give a superhero the safe binding tips you looked up for your buddy, he wonders, and then proceeds to just word-vomit them all over the guy anyway. Chat Noir just kind of stares at him. And then turns BRIGHT FUCKING RED and BOUNDS away. Nino immediately feels guilty–he wasn’t threatening to out him or anything, he just doesn’t want the guy to HURT himself, you know? 
  • … the temptation to tell Adrien is REALLY HIGH, though. Adrien worries way too much about what other people are gonna think. Still, though, outting a dude without his permission is not cool, so Nino restrains himself. Even though it is REALLY tempting. 
  • He DOES give Adrien the safer binding tips, obviously. For some reason Adrien spends the whole conversation low-key mortified, but Nino does his best to not make it weird. Just because he’s got a big dumb crush on the dude and was secretly disappointed that Adrien WASN’T checking him out all this time doesn’t mean he has to make things awkward, right? 

(I’m not doing any more of these right now, just finishing the ones I had!) 

170402 Jikook/Kookmin

Okay so this is about the Hollywire interview, which I’m positive (and 100% sure) that it happened on the 2nd day of the concert in Anaheim.

Ah before starting, I need to make myself clear as well. This is basically guess, assumption, opinion etc. which is made by a Jikook/Kookmin shipper (me xD). So it can be very biased, of course, even tho I try my best not to be biased, since I’m the type of shipper who only believes in what she sees. But yeah, you can disagree and dislike it, but I hope no one will be rude to Jikook/Kookmin shippers in general because of this. Please don’t judge other shippers just because of me is what I mean :-)


So let’s review what happened that day 1st.

I’m not sure if this happened before or after the soundcheck, but I guess it happened after, since they were fully clothed and wore makeup. 

On that day (you can refer to this fanaccount for more detail), I basically summed it up as Jimin rejected a backhug from Jungkook. We didn’t know what happened in detail, but I assumed they had a small quarrel, and perhaps, perhaps Jungkook was the cause, so I observed some unnatural things below.


1st:

Somehow I notice Jungkook is pretty cautious towards Jimin, like his wary eyes looking to Jimin’s direction here:

Like he looks pretty uneasy:


2nd:

And when they are asked to do the Bangtan bangtan bangbangtan cheer, 1st Monie gives the sign to Jimin by touching him:

Notice how quickly Jungkook reacts while Jin is still holding his hands together:

As Jungkook’s fingers lands on Monie’s hand, Jimin’s are supposed to be next:

Like normally your hand should go down, but Jimin’s hand suddenly goes up (he changes its direction very clear, please refer to the original video to see):

and then literally lands in the air before some other members put their fingers there and he places his on

Okay, I totally mean that he avoids skinship with Jungkook.


3rd:

Moving on, I’m pretty sure most of you noticed international playboy Jungkook is back, he keeps placing his hand on the wall behind the interviewer’s back, but another coincidence happens right after Hobi places his hand on Jimin’s shoulder:

It’d be a coincidence for me if Jungkook didn’t see it, and his expressions weren’t like that… You know, one thing adds to another… So he’s getting close to the interviewer again with that hand on the wall.


4th:

Next, when the interviewer asks “who’s the most intense on stage?”, even tho she said all were indicating Monie, my shipper’s eyes can’t help but notice Jungkook is actually pointing at Jimin (the camera didn’t film Jungkook’s face so I couldn’t verify if he was looking at Jimin, so I could be wrong here).

And Jimin is clearly not very amused even tho he was smiling just secs before…


5th:

When they are asked who takes the longest time to prepare…

He has this kinda look when he looks at Jimin, I dunno how to explain it, like kinda sulky(?) :

but he mumbles “Jimin” anw xD

While everyone is smiling Jungkook is “…”


I’m like 80% sure that I notice that tongue-in-the-cheek-thing here after Jimin being complimented and everyone having fun (except for our baby), but I could be wrong because of the lighting…

Maybe someone who can gif can try to gif this moment and somehow tries to make the lighting differently so that it’s easier to see? I dunno, I’m dumb when it comes to technology, sorry, I tried TT_TT

If this is really true then at this point I’m pretty convinced he just does that thing unconsciously whenever it comes to Jimin. It’s nothing bad tbh, please don’t make a big deal out of it…

Bonus:

You can watch this interview which happened on the same day as well. I mean it’s so rare for them to stand next to each other and have no interaction at all, esp. there’s this heavy air surrounding them. Look how when the interview just starts, Jimin distances himself from Jungkook this much:


All in all, I make this not to cause any controversy/worry about their relationship. They’re humans, they have feelings. They can be mad, they can quarrel sometimes. That doesn’t mean their relationship will break or collapse or anything of the sort. I just find it interesting to observe their interaction with each other, in good or bad times.

And I’m pretty sure they solved it not too long after that. I mean, hello, 21st century girls’s moments (maybe Jimin hit Jungkook’s chest because of that haha * joke joke *)

So yeah, thank you so much for bearing with my horrible screen caps and writing. I mean, I tried my best, so… 

Also, if anyone has anything about Jikook/Kookmin that you wanna discuss with me, please feel free to do so (pretty please, I’ve been using this for a while but I have no one to talk with TT_TT)

Again, thank you for spending time reading this~~~ and have a nice day or good night wherever you are~, be happy with Jikook and Bangtan ♥

🐥🐰🌼🌺☀️✨🌙

anonymous asked:

what's your headcanon for Hannibal and Will doing the dirty in a car, especially while one is driving? (or in public in general, but in the purposes of not making you do research for eons I'd say car for now)

Anon, my lovely friend, I don’t think I want to know what kind of research you think I do for these asks!  If you just mean “sitting here on my couch, waiting for Stardew Valley to download onto my Playstation, considering the Official Damn Slippy Planet Enterprises Department of Headcanon Sciences Stance On Road Head”, it is no hardship.  

That said, I’m gonna say no to actual sex acts while driving for these two.  But an enthusiastic yes to discussions of sex while driving, since as we all know from the halcyon days of “I think that your therapy requires you to tell me in explicit detail how you would kill me with your hands and maybe some bondage, Will, and look pretty while you do it”, they’re both pretty into weird metaphorical explicit dirty talk, and Will is a terrible tease.  Whoever is in the passenger seat probably gets a little handsy during these conversations.

(Wouldn’t you like to hear that police report when Hannibal gets distracted enough to drive into a tree? “Well, officer, my husband here got me all hot under the collar with an extended metaphor about his dick and snails, and he kept swallowing in this incredibly distracting way, it’s really all his fault.”  Meanwhile Will’s just batting his eyelashes at the officer and Hannibal and anyone else in sight, playing dumb-but-pretty, an act he’s been perfecting lately, and Hannibal gives up and just snaps the officer’s neck because he’s not talking his way out of this one and he needs to get back to that discussion about snails, immediately.)

I don’t necessarily see parked car sex as a big thing either.  But I’m gonna say there’s a fair amount of parked car heated-making-out, all the stupid backseat fooling around neither of them ever got to do as a youngster.  But Will, the World’s Biggest Tease, usually insists on being taken home to an actual bed (or at least the front hallway) before things get beyond the making-out stage.

Sometimes.  Not always.  Will Graham is an unpredictable force of nature, more now than ever since he threw his old life away and fished a new one out of the sea, and he gets what he wants most of the time, and sometimes he doesn’t want to wait to get home at all.

(The car trunk always contains a thick and comfortable picnic blanket. Sometimes it’s for actual picnics.  Sometimes it’s for wrapping up whatever muddy stray dog Will’s just taken in from the side of the road. And sometimes, just once in a while, it’s for pulling over as soon as possible, finding the nearest patch of woods/tall grass/whatever that’s reasonably hidden from the road, and doing unspeakable things under the open sky.  Will has a ten-step training program for getting Hannibal to appreciate the great outdoors properly, and al fresco handjobs are step four.)

7

HEYYY…so here’s some stuff!

Those of you who’ve never seen my 2011 SVA thesis film “Balancing Act”, go check that out. Super-long-story-short, it’s my “magnum opus” IP that I really wanna do something with someday. Alternatively, it’s that “I made this in Elementary School and created a bunch of characters based on me and my friends and wanted to make my own animu idea that usually goes nowhere and has been in development for 20+ years while I work on other/newer/better ideas” IP. Y’know, one of those. You probably see ‘em on DeviantArt and Tumblr all the fucking time; hence why I don’t really post stuff about it online much these days. That said, posting this art here isn’t a confirmation that something’s happening with it. I’d just stocked up SO many doodles and sketches I felt like putting them out there eventually. Some of these date back as far as 2012 and this isn’t even half of them since I have plenty from various sketchbooks I’ve never scanned.

“What the fuck is this shit, Kirb!?” WELL KIDS, it’s the adventures of self-insert-I-wish-I-was-a-superhero-character and his friends as they go through their trials and tribulations of forming a makeshift superhero team and fight bad guys and learn valuable life lessons about being different, self-acceptance, dealing with deep personal issues and eating healthy or some bullshit. It’s gone through countless re-iterations as I’ve grown and learned and expanded my life views. I want it to be a story that’s really deeply impactful and meaningful, but it’s not something I’m ready to do yet. I need to get better at all aspects of film-making and storytelling. There’s a lot of basic things about “what am I saying?” regarding the story that haven’t been fully fleshed out. Might be years before I ever get to that point; or maybe I never will. Who knows. But once in a while, I’ll draw these four kids and experiment around with shit.

“Frost” (the skinny fuck who looks like ani-’me’) has various blue and white hoodies, is generally awkward (I made him way too “””cool””” in the thesis film; I was emulating Yusuke Urameshi’s sarcastic attitude) and a massive fuck-up (JUST LIKE ACTUAL-ME, HEYYY) and I’ve spent the last year on the story side of things researching a lot about various mental illnesses and how to apply them to him in ways that benefit his development as part of a team he fits into (or not).

“Ilaqua” was previously the character based on (and who looked like) Mike Luckas, that I decided…now I think well over 3 years ago, to change to a girl. I debated back and forth which character to switch (because I wanted two guys and two girls on the main cast) and thought about changing the Earth-elemental guy, but decided to gamble on tossing her in with the many, many Water-elemental girls. (a.k.a. I felt it was easier to differentiate Girl!Mike from the likes of Katara and Korra than seeing Girl!Nick get more-easily compared to Toph.) Mike helped me re-design her (which was also tricky to make sure she wasn’t too similar to Grace Liu’s Enna) and “Mikaela” has become one of my favorite characters to draw.

“Nico” (now re-named in tribute to TwistedGrimTV) is mostly the same. Honestly, getting a hat shape with him that I don’t despise has been my biggest difficulty with him. I also wanna try giving him way more exaggerated anatomy (something like Sajad Gharibi); a body he’d be picked on for having even though he’s not violent at all by nature (he’s actually meant to be more paranoiac and anxious), nor is he “the big dumb one”.

“Kathy” is also mostly the same, but there’s been some minor things I keep trying to fix with her design that I can’t quite get right. I wanted to go more gothic with her choice of fashion, which lent itself to her mysterious demeanor. My biggest aggravation is finding a hair-shape that isn’t a pain in my asshole. It’s evolved a lot from the Rumiko Takahashi-style cut, but I’m still not happy with any particular shape yet.

I also had some help from Mike Luckas and Xander Mobus on trying to design some practical, yet “we have no money or resources to get really efficient ones” superhero costumes. Most of their superhero nicknames (invented by Frost, which the new TMNT beat me to the punch on with Michelangelo’s nicknames for the bad guys, whoops.) are still WIP. Currently I like “Cardice” for Frost and “Landlord” for Mantel. Previously Ilaqua was “Firefighter” and Kathy was “Brightside” but those both may change; they might all change. Hell, ALL of this might change in 15-20-30 years from now if this ever gets made.

On that note, I GREATLY appreciate all the interest in it! I’ve had many folks from time to time ask if I ever plan on doing something more with this concept. It is my every intention to someday; in fact I THINK about it every day. Maybe I’ll do it as a movie, maybe it’ll still be a series like I originally thought, or maybe somehow it’ll be a game or something. Maybe it’ll be none of those things. Maybe it’ll be a hologram projected directly into your brain stem. Who the fuck knows. Here’s a bunch of drawings about it. Enjoy. Or not.

things to appreciate about that dumbfuck cartridge tasting video: 

- self-awareness about how fucking dumb it actually is
- the fact that we know they own Just Dance 2017 cmon do it guys do it
- the fact that even their aprons are co-owned
- dan commenting on phil’s (lack of) muscle tone under his clothes
- “give it a big hefty lick” 
- phil’s face when he’s watching dan make those faces 
- phil asking dan if he wants water then reaching over dan to hand dan the water even though it would have been easier for dan to pick it up
- “how tasty is link? lets find out” “i don’t know, lets find out” said almost in sync 
- “big lick. big lick, like a dog.”
- “it’s a bit sticky from my spit.” 
- six of those miracle berries were missing from the packet meaning i can scientifically conclude they 100% used those for come tasting at some point
- “don’t tongue the bit on the edge” “i’ll tongue whatever i want, mate”
- “i sucked the whole thing into my mouth” 
- “I just gave it a dainty lick, you put the whole thing in your mouth.” 

So a guy came in like five minutes before we closed, which is a dick move to begin with, but it gets so much better so strap in folks. I asked him if there was anything we could help him find since We’d be closing soon and he’s like “nah I’m just window shopping.” so I’m like “alright that’s cool lemme know if there’s anything I can do to help my guy,” to which he replied “ok thank u sir.”

Now let me pause here and mention that I’ve got a lady body but I don’t get my britches twisted over that sort of thing since I’m also like six feet tall and have short hair so I get called sir pretty often, especially if people aren’t paying attention and also gender is a social construct so honestly who even cares.

Late night window shopper here, however, recognizes his slip almost immediately and is like “O SORRY MA'AM MY BAD” which is cool like god for u tryna respect gender presentation I guess. My big dumb customer service ass, trying not to make the dude feel bad replies like “ur good my guy its whatever.”
Now this guy - THIS GUY - responds in the most the snidest fucking voice “Oh yeah sure, sir, ma'am, f****t, its all the same right?”
Like… Wtf dude I was just trying to make your mistake less embarrassing for u that was just the most unnecessary.

Imagine: Tyler Seguin - Anything But Cute

Requested: Yes | No

  • hptc22 asked: Can u do a cute one with Tyler seguin where u confront him Bc he said he only wanted to date older girls and u are younger then him and ur insecure Bc u want him to think ur like hot not adorable and he’s sweet and blah blah <33

Word Count: 1,165

Summary: You watch Tyler’s “Barstool The Life” video and notice the part where he says he’d only date older girls… It preys on your insecurity a little bit so you decide to find out what Tyler really thinks about your age. 

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