he does yoga on the floor

So here’s the thing. The thing is that Yuuri Katsuki is mind-blowingly sexy and Viktor can’t even deal with it, and Yuuri sort of doesn’t even realize it? Like not in a “YOU DON’T KNOW YOUR BEAU-TI-FUL” type way, but in an Oops, that’s a sex way.

Yuuri obviously has many moments of very purposeful, planned seduction and they are successful without exception, but there are also things that he does without even thinking about them, and these are the things that sucker-punch Viktor in the gut with how hot they are.

Like, they’re making out and Yuuri pulls away and his eyes are narrow, there’s color high on his cheeks, his lips are red. He leans back in and licks Viktor’s lips in a straight line from his chin to his nose and in his head he’s going Oh this is weird but Viktor is dying, dying and going to heaven

They’re watching television and Yuuri is bored, flipping through his phone, leaning against one arm of the couch while Viktor is slumped against the other, Makkachin sprawled under his knees and his feet on Yuuri’s thighs. And apropos of nothing, without even looking away from his phone, Yuuri says, “I really want to suck your dick right now,” the same way that people say things like I could go for a pizza and Viktor goes hard so fast that he’s afraid he’s going to stroke out.

Viktor’s doing some yoga, or something, on the floor and when Yuuri comes in, he puts one foot on either side of Viktor’s body and shuffles up until he’s standing over Viktor’s hips, which is kind of funny and sexy in a cute way, and Viktor expects him to kneel down and they’ll make out for a little while or something. Instead, Yuuri–who’s in socks–slides his feet out from under himself, slowly, until he’s at Viktor’s level. He literally does a split on Viktor’s dick. “Hi,” says Yuuri, perfectly nonchalant, as klaxons blare in Viktor’s brain–something along the lines of Emergency, emergency, my husband is too hot, this is not a drill.

Sports Bras and Trench Coats

Request: Could you do one where the reader is the Winchester’s little (half) sister and she stays behind on hunts to do research and what not. But she also does stuff like yoga while her brothers are gone and Cas comes to check on her and she’s still in her yoga clothes so it leads to smutty goodness and both them confessing their feelings or something like that

Pairing: Castiel x Reader

Warnings: Smut, lanugage, oral (female receiving), slight dom!cas, ehh and some orgasm denial, it’s just very smutty okay?

Word Count: 1.9k

Originally posted by castielthesoldierofgod

You were stretching, getting ready to do your morning yoga when your phone rang. Every time you were getting ready to do something for yourself your phone rang. Everytime.

“Hey Sammy.” You tried not to sound annoyed.

“Okay, so, this isn’t a werewolf.” he said right away.

“What? How do you know?”

“Hearts aren’t missing, they’re just…placed somewhere else.”

You sighed, knowing you were going to have to do the research for this one, not that you really minded, you just wish that your brothers didn’t need you at the exact moment you were getting ready to do something else.

“Okay, I’ll look it up.”

“Thanks, Y/N, you’re the best.” he told you.

“I know,” you said before hanging up.

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magic of the night | myg

summary: there is a witch you go to for spells and potions whenever human nature is not enough for things to go your way, and he loves you more than anyone else ever will.
{witch!au, halloween!au}
pairing: yoongi x female reader
word count: 5k
genre: horror, angst
warnings: ft. obsessive characters and actions
a/n: this is my contribution to the wonderful stories no one dares to tell collab i’m doing with some other very lovely writers!!! i was given yoongi, and witch yoongi is just smth i can’t resist ;-;

People always say never to make deals with the devil, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make deals with witches. Witches who are more than willing to strike up a bargain with you so that the both of you get what you want.

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The Accidental Husband

Part 1 - Breakups and Marriages

Fireman!Dean x Reader

A/N: This is an AU inspired by the namesake movie. It doesn’t follow the same storyline, just the main concept.

Summary: Dean gets dumped and apparently it’s all your fault. That’s why he and Charlie decide that a little payback is not gonna hurt and, if it does, well… then it’s just karma.

Word Count: 1800+

Tags: @mrswhozeewhatsis @why-do-you-want-my-user-name @daydreamingintheimpala @driverpicksthemuusic  @mysoul4dean @thing-you-do-with-that-thing  @amoreagron @spnfangirl1965 @aristtewinchesterholmes @thisisthelilith @chelsea072498 @skymoonandstardust 

Originally posted by frozen-delight

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anonymous asked:

I just imagine johan running through the neighborhood barefoot yelling "THANK YOU MOTHER NATURE!" And everyone thinks he's insane. Do you have any other headcannons?

Headcanons of Johan in NYC doing things that even weirdos in the city don’t really do? How does that sound? 

  • Naked Yoga by the window (everyone knows what Johan is packing) 
  • Starts doing pottery on the fire escape
  • Sits on the floor when he rides the train and mediates 
  • Flipflops no matter the weather
  • Hails a taxi but standing in the dead center of the road, very effective but Usnavi has a mini heart attack every time
  • Eats dandelions off park grass grounds
  • Disposes of documents not by shredding but fills a bucket of water and mushes the paper down and uses it for paper mache projects
  • He had a hemp garden for all of a day until Usnavi kindly reminded him a Hispanic and a Black man growing weed in New York City in 2017 is probs not the safest idea. 
  • Makes compost tea
  • Swaps clothing with the homeless

“This is ridiculous,” Dean mutters as he rolls out his mat, side-eyeing the fuck out of his brother. His sweatpants are already sticking to his legs with the heat of the room, and for the first time in his life, he wishes he’d worn shorts. “I’m gonna suffocate,” he declares. “I’m gonna die doing hot yoga and it’s gonna be embarrassing.”

Sam rolls his eyes. “Would you calm down?”

“Ha!” Dean scoffs. “Easy for you to say. Look at you, with your goddamn hippie man bun and your short shorts and—”

“—These are regular shorts, Dean—”

“And with your fuckin’ tank top you’re in your natural habitat! Jesus, Sam, you’re like the king of the motherfucking granolas!”

“And you’re being a little bitch,” Sam counters, getting himself set up and sitting, cross-legged, to center himself. He closes his eyes. “The physio said this is the best thing for your shoulder, so we’re here. Now shut your trap and take it like a man.”

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Okay, so can we talk about this gif:

(Thanks, wonderlandinmymind, for a gif of this perfect, perfect moment!)

This is by far my favorite piece of choreography in the film. It’s so fun. The next shot is Eggsy’s point of view, shooting upside-down to take down the next solider. But I’m just totally entranced by the take-down and then the way he arches his spine, pushes his hips up so that he’s balanced in a way where he can stretch his arms and make the shot. I love this part, okay?

But enough about me watching this - I want to see Harry watching Eggsy do this.

Maybe it’s a move Eggsy does again on a mission with Harry - and hey, Harry hasn’t seen it before, there’s no harm in making use of the same move twice if it works. So Eggsy goes for the take-down and slams a guard into the floor, presses against the floor and curves his spine, sending his hips into the air in a move that would make any yoga teacher proud - and balances just so to make the next shot. 

But doing this makes the bottom of his suit-jacket fall open, showing off Eggsy’s trim hips where his shirt is tucked into his trousers, and puts his crotch on display. It’s a little unintentional - it’s showy, but to show off his athleticism, not his goods, but it has the same result. 

Harry stares. Harry remember’s Eggsy’s background in gymnastics, after seeing first hand how flexible and strong he is. Harry sees the muscles in Eggsy’s thighs and hips working to keep him balanced like this, all brutal grace in the heat of a moment.

And after seeing that, after seeing Eggsy like that - oh, Harry’s got a problem.

Super (Sappy) Hero

HI IT’S DAY 2
prompt was Disney au and The Incredibles is possibly my absolute favourite Disney/pixar movie <i>ever</i> and I looove superheroes so here,have a malec superhero au.
Also,my finger slipped so this became a few thousand words longer than intended sorry,,,,
@magnusbane-aleclightwood doing great job gud1 yay

~

He’s sitting in his office,looking out the window when he hears it.

Police car sirens and helicopters outside.

He hates to stop his work and he does have a meeting in an hour,but he’s quickly getting sick of the Underminer and if all this commotion is his doing, he’s having none of it.

Also,he absolutely refuses to let someone as base as the Warlock take away his villain.

So in a matter of minutes, he’s lied to his secretary that he’s going out for some air,changed in his car and is breaking a thousand traffic rules on his way to the scene.

(Whatever, it’s for the greater good.)

It’s at a mall and not for the first time,Alec finds himself questioning the Underminer.

What was he thinking?The mall on a Tuesday afternoon?Does he even want to kill people?

(Although,the Underminer is a mole, and Alec doesn’t really know mole behaviour,so he’s come to terms with the fact that his job stops at saving people and judo flipping bad guys,not questioning their motives.)

He reaches just at the right time.

In an attack,any time before the Warlock shows up is the right time.

Alec makes quick work of the Underminer (a mole who apparently likes H&M and left a hole in its floor when he left) and he’s just dusting his hands when he hears a soft Shit behind him.

He knows who it is before he even turns and really,he can’t be blamed if he feels a little cocky.

“Well,hello there,Warlock.Nice of you to show up,” he says goadingly as he turns around to face said super.

The Warlock seems stumped for a moment before he resumes his usual nonchalant stance.

“You probably think you’ve beaten me,”he says with an almost indulgent smile on his face.

Alec replies,”If you mean I reached before you and left the mole with a bleeding snout and possibly a broken forelimb with zero civilian casualties, then yes,yes I do think I have beaten you.”

The Warlock gives a little laugh and says,”Ah,my little Shadowhunter-“

“Don’t call me your little Shadowhunter. I am neither little nor yours.”

The Warlock plows on as if Alec never interrupted him.

“You’re sorely mistaken if you think I won’t bounce back.What makes you think I’ll let you reach before me next time?”

Alec rolls his eyes under his mask.

“That’s what you said the last time.I think you’re losing touch.”

The Warlock starts walking backwards with an irritating degree of carelessness.

“We’ll see,Shadowhunter.We’ll see.”

With that,he’s out the entrance and the next second, he’s on his bike, going god knows where.

Alec does a quick survey of the mall to make sure the Underminer hasn’t returned for more dresses from the SS 17 collection and on giving the all clear to the cops, he’s out too,on his way back to the office for his meeting.

(He buys a coffee on the way as well, because Superhero Rule #1 is Nobody can know.)

(Because if word gets out that he,Alec Lightwood, entrepreneur, CEO of Lightwood & Co.,investor, multi-millionaire before 30 is the Shadowhunter,everything is going to go to shit.)

.

Alec reaches home late,and he enters his building cursing the traffic.

(Also cursing the Warlock because he got bored and it makes him happy.)

He reaches his floor and he’s keying open the door,when the apartment next to his opens.

And out steps Magnus Bane.

Alec knows all about Magnus Bane.

He’s quite possibly the hottest man he’s ever seen,for one.He’s also a tattoo artist and he’s yet to find an inch of him that isn’t covered with them.He also bikes to work in a leather jacket .He has an extremely pleasing baritone voice when he sings shitty pop songs in the shower. Sometimes he does yoga in his balcony.He’s super funny. He has two cats named Church and Captain Meow whom he incessantly posts photos of on Instagram. His arms were carved by the gods.

Also,Alec’s been crushing on him for the past two months straight.

The above facts are probably the reason why,when Alec sees him coming out, he ends up dropping his keys with a “He-Oh shit.”

Magnus laughs and Alec thinks that maybe that’s the music played in heaven.

And when Magnus bends to pick up the keys with a “Here,let me get that for you.” Alec absolutely does not check out his ass.

(He’s wearing tight black jeans and oh my god.)

It’s all he can do to accept the keys from Magnus,say,”Th-Thanks,” mumble some rubbish about being tired and practically zoom into his apartment,slamming the door on his hot neighbour’s face.

It’s with a doleful feeling of Why am I the way I am? and thoughts of Magnus Bane’s forearm flexing under an inking of stars that Alec goes to bed that night.

.

The next few days go normally.No attacks by the Underminer,no more noteworthy interactions with Magnus Bane(who has now taken to singing Teenage Dream era Katy Perry in the shower,Alec is happy to report) and nothing apart from routine at the company.

In fact,the next time any of that sort happens is a whole week later.

He’s getting ready to leave at 8 in the morning for a meeting with Lydia Branwell, CEO of Branwell Industries, to discuss a merger(he anticipates it to be smooth sailing because they went to school together and got along fairly well)when there’s a news report on his phone.

The Underminer strikes again.

In a matter of seconds,Alec’s worn his tie,grabbed his breakfast and is on his way to the location.

(And also noticed Magnus Bane on his bike outside the apartment.It makes him look forward to this fight. He’s so whipped and he hasn’t even had a conversation that’s lasted more than 5 minutes with him.)

He reaches minutes later and the sight he’s greeted with is disheartening.

I mean,yeah, everyone’s safe and the Underminer’s trademark hole in the ground signifying his exit is there so nobody’s in danger,except there’s also the Warlock walking jauntily towards him,having the impudence to whistle.

He’s dimly aware that he’s whistling the tune of California Gurls and he’s about to say something snarky about the fact but the Warlock beats him to it.

“Ah,my little Shadowhunter.Pity you missed this one.I let him give me his whole plan before I knocked him out. It was fun.”

Alec’s feeling super bitter right now and grabs at strings to one-up his nemesis-but-also-fellow-super.

“What kind of name is Warlock?” he says almost petulantly.

(It’s far from his best but he’s pissed.)

And the Warlock has the damn nerve to reply, ”The kind that you’re going to be crying out tonight.”

And then he winks.

Alec’s left dumbstruck as the Warlock (damn him) walks past him saying,”I don’t have time to give you the details,but it’ll probably be all over the news,so you can catch the mole’s evil plan to destroy the city and all that jazz.”

Ugh>

.

Apparently,the mole has a legitimate evil plan to destroy the city and all that jazz.

Alec does,indeed,catch it on the news that evening as he’s eating his dinner and frankly,he doesn’t know if he should take it seriously or not.

The Underminer is…a mole. All his attacks so far seem pretty low-key. He seems like one of those small-time villains trying too hard to be a super-villain and ends up coming across as goofy.

This plan,though?Detailed and comprehensive and seemingly exceedingly well thought out.

Super-villain material.

He’s contemplating the possibility of the Underminer working for someone else, when the news reporter says something that prompts his attention.

‘The Warlock was seen goading the Underminer in the scene of the attack, prompting him to reveal his plans.This leads us to question the effectiveness of older,more well-established supers who prefer to use the less-talk-more-fight method to deal with villains.If it was one of them who were present instead, would we have been able to take precautions?Are modern,maybe a little eccentric super-villains like the Warlock who seemingly actively go against tried and tested methods more suited for dealing with today’s villains? All these questions and more will be debated tonight at 9 on our Warlock special,right here.Don’t mis-’

Alec doesn’t let her go on.The television’s turned off,the lights are turned off and he turns in for the night.

Ugh seems to be a regularly occurring sentiment.

.

The next meeting between the Warlock and the Shadowhunter takes place yet another week later.

Alec’s in a meeting at the moment and he’s listening to someone from R&D prattle about how they need updated machinery when his eye catches his phone blinking with a notification.

He calls for a break so he can check his phone(greater good,remember?) and when he does,he sees that it’s an attack.

He makes some excuses and within moments, he’s changing while driving(hazardous,do not try).

He’s just put on his mask as he’s nearing the restaurant where the attack’s happened and as he’s pulling into a nearby alley,he thinks he sees a flash of someone very familiar looking driving past him but why would Magnus Bane be driving in the direction of the attack?

His thoughts are interrupted by the sound of screaming and the next second, he’s pulling patrons out of the building while the Warlock’s fighting some new guy who’s speaking in a language none of them seem to know.

Said new guy also has claws.

Alec can’t wait to join the fray.

He’s shuffling the last screaming diner out(“Oh thank you, Shadowhunter!”) and he turns around expecting Mr.Claws (because that’s what he heard him roar when asked his name) and the Warlock, ready to unleash some good old battle moves but all he sees when he turns is some asshole wearing spandex and a purple mask.

Alec will not stand for this.

“I was right here,” he whines.

“Ran a little late,did you? Don’t worry.He wasn’t much of an opponent.You didn’t miss a lot.”

Alec’s clearly losing touch when he replies with,”Your mask is a stupid colour.”

The Warlock chuckles.

“Oh, don’t be bitter Shadowhunter, you might get the next one.”

With that last comment and whistling a cheery tune, he’s out the door.

.

When the notification comes,Alec’s in the shower.

He hears the shrill sound of his phone and gets out of the bathroom in record time.

At first,he can’t comprehend what he’s reading.

The Underminer’s attacked that new Mexican restaurant in the city.

But that’s where Izzy said she’d be today, lunching with her friends.

So that can’t be right,can it?

Alec goes through the motions in a rush,pulling on his suit,wearing a t-shirt and pants on top,stuffing the mask in his pocket.

He slams his door shut and sprints down the stairs.

He’s almost at the bottom,when he turns the corner and is stopped short by someone else in front of him.

Magnus Bane.

Alec’s in too much of a tizzy to fall to pieces right now and impatiently dogs his steps, trying to find a way to overtake him on the narrow stairwell.

Magnus Bane’s walking fast too but not nearly fast enough because Izzy’s there in that restaurant,okay and Alec needs to get there right now so he pushes past Magnus with an “Excuse me,sorry.I’m in a bit of a rush right now.”

Except,things don’t always go according to plan so as Alec’s pushing past,his t-shirt gets caught on a nail and there’s the sound of ripping cloth.

Alec twists around to make sure the back of his t-shirt is intact but all he sees is the blue fabric of his super suit.

It’s bright and silvery and the hole in the shirt is so huge,you can even see part of the logo on his suit.

So can Magnus Bane,who is currently doing so,opening and closing his mouth like a fish,looking dumbstruck.

Alec realises the gravity of the situation but Izzy,please let her be okay and so,all he can do is say,”Please don’t tell anybody.” and leaving behind a sputtering Magnus Bane,he rushes out of the building, making sure to duck into the nearest alley and remove his ruined t-shirt and jeans completely.

He reaches in moments and the relief he feels on seeing Izzy near the paramedics with a bunch of other people,looking shaken but unhurt,is enormous.

He can still hear noises from within the restaurant so he rushes inside to see the Underminer turning over tables and making a hell of a din.

He’s in the middle of kicking the mole on the face and hopefully making his snout bleed again (consistency is key) when he’s momentarily distracted by the arrival of the Warlock.

Even he isn’t sure what happens next but somehow,the Shadowhunter and the Warlock end up fighting this guy(mole) together and wow what is happening, he’s so confused.

It isn’t long before they’re both standing next to the unconscious body of the Underminer as the police make their way in.

Alec really doesn’t feel like dealing with the Warlock’s shit this time and he’s about to just walk out without their customary snark but as he exits the restaurant,he feels a hand grip his forearm,stopping him from going any further.

“What do you want,Warlock?”

The Warlock seems to be having some internal battle but when he seemingly makes up his mind,he walks ahead of Alec, dragging him behind.

“Follow me,” he says.

It’s short and crisp and Alec doesn’t know what to make of it because it’s so different from the Warlock’s usual choice of phrase.

He’s dragged into an alley nearby and he sees a familiar bike parked in the corner.

The Warlock lets go of his arm and as Alec’s wondering just what Magnus Bane’s bike is doing here,a voice cuts in saying,”Do you recognise the vehicle?”

Alec doesn’t know where this is going but he realises that this isn’t the time to joke because the Warlock seems pretty serious.

Which is new.

So he replies,albeit grudgingly,with “It belongs to my neighbour.Why? Were you planning on getting one like it but needed my opinion?”

The Warlock takes a deep breath in and breathes out,like he’s mustering the courage to do something.

He says,”Actually,I already did.”

Alec’s really confused right now especially because the Warlock seems to be looking at him like that last sentence meant something.

“Er…congratulations?”

The Warlock huffs.

“You’re rather slow for someone who’s supposed to be smart,huh?”

And the next thing he knows,in one swift motion,the Warlock’s pulled off his mask revealing his identity.

His identity being…Magnus Bane.

Alec needs to sit down.

He does.

His head’s spinning and things are going too fast and his crush is the Warlock and it’s all so hard to believe but as Alec’s trying to wrap his head around it,bits and pieces of his memory come back to him.

How he saw Magnus on his bike that day on his way to the park.How Magnus was driving towards the restaurant that day they fought Mr.Claws.How Magnus was leaving the apartment the same time he was this morning and was in a rush too.

When he thinks about it that way, it all seems so obvious.

And oh my god the Katy Perry music.

He should have known.

He says this out loud and the Warlock/hot neighbour says,”Well now you do.”

Alec is still coming to terms with the fact that his crush is his sworn enemy when Magnus places a bundle in his hands.

It’s his t-shirt and jeans.

Alec looks up at Magnus and swallowing the lump in his throat, asks,”Why did you tell me?”

Magnus shrugs.

“It was only fair.”

Alec accepts that and asks,”What now?We just act like we don’t know eachother’s secret when we meet in the corridor?”

Magnus sits down next to him and to Alec’s surprise,removes Alec’s mask too.

“I have a different proposition, actually.”

Alec sees Magnus playing with his mask in his lap and wow his fingers.

“What?”he finally asks.

“Did you remember that day you shifted into the apartment?I took an instant liking to you.”

“I dropped a box on your foot,” Alec deadpans.

Magnus chuckles saying,”And when you apologised,it was the most adorable thing in the world.”

Alec doesn’t know if he should feel gratified or offended and he stores the statement in his memory for future analysis and says,”So you think we should be friends?Bros? Hang out and all that jazz and occasionally fight bad guys together?”

Magnus turns towards Alec and shuffles closer.

Alec can feel his knee brushing against Magnus’s shin and oh my god he’s touching Magnus Bane.

Magnus moves his face closer and closer and Alec can’t move,can’t breathe.

Magnus is so close Alec can see the little flecks of colour in his otherwise hazel eyes and now their lips are inches apart.

This is a dream and Alec doesn’t want it to end.

The stillness is interrupted by Magnus saying,”If this is what friends do,” and the next thing he knows, Magnus’s lips are soft against his and Alec knows this can’t possibly be real but as he reciprocates,he knows that it is as well,if that makes sense.

It’s all new and wonderful and everything Alec thought it would be and when they pull apart after what seems like eternity and they just sit there,looking at eachother.

Alec quite likes the feeling of Magnus Bane nearly pressing into his side and just looking at him and it’s too soon to talk or even comprehend but nonetheless,he asks softly,”What are we?”

Magnus gives a small laugh.

He starts dislodging himself to Alec’s disappointment and as he’s pulling on clothes on top of his suit from his bike,he says,”Why don’t we see over dinner tonight?My place.I’ll cook.”

And Alec just sits there stumped because so much has happened so fast but the bottom line is, his crush who happens to be his neighbour who also happens to be a super whom he’s always detested just asked him on a date after kissing him and what is even happening?

His head’s in a whirl and he just looks at Magnus,no longer wearing his suit, revving his bike and driving out with one last wink thrown in his direction.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

My favorite headcanons

-Tony once had to pay for a camera from the 40s Steve broke after he swore he remembered how to operate it properly.

-in fact. Tony has to pay for a lot of things being broken. And not specifically because the team was fighting (fighting villains that is, Thor sometimes gets excited (or drunk) and just starts THROWING PLATES AND CUPS AROUND AND TONY IS SCREAMING INTERNALLY)

-Steve being delighted that the lgbt and colored communities are getting more recognition. But knows the fights far from over and makes a point to participate in protests and pride parades to show support.

-So you know how we have basically an universal headcanon that Clint climbs through vents and to high places? We’ll, Tony’s starting to mess with him and has booby trapped a couple common Clint places with some harmless but agitating pranks. Which he didn’t mention to the rest of the team until his feathered friend marched in with…well feathers all over him. Demanding to know where his cheetos went.

-Natasha looking like she doesn’t really enjoy all of this and acts professional (and like she’d rather be anywhere else) especially in meetings with shield. But she totally adds fuel to the fire every time there’s an opportunity to start some…excitement around here. (like suggesting to tony to booby traps some vents…then stealing Clints stuff and making it look like Tony did it. She’s the real one pulling a lot of the strings and gets zero of the blame when Tony and Clint almost blow up the tower in their dangerous prank war extravaganza)

-Nearly half the team have anonymously run shitposting blogs that are extremely famous for their strange circumstances about parts of their lives that are completely serious (example: I did not run away from an orphanage and then join a circus and then become a secret agent for you to insult the way I said “Poughkeepsie” okay) They compete over who has the most followers. Amazingly (or not) Bruce has been in the lead for over 6 months.

-who’s the best at dance dance revolution? Nobody will say, when they’re asked they just say they don’t want to talk about what happened. Tony bought it. And then threw it out the next day (Literally. He just…threw it into space.) that’s all anyone knows of the story. And the theories are some of the most popular on the web.

-The team goes to the zoo. Tony points at a snake “That’s you, Sneve”. Steve rolls his eyes and points at a small stray cat that just startled a lion. “That’s you Tomew” Rhodey points to some monkeys “That’s all of you, dumbasses.”

-We all accept good and well that Tony CANNOT sit still for the life of him. But the team would rather take the rapid shaking of his leg or the tapping of his fingers on the table than when he’s allowed to move during a meeting. He’ll pace. And pace. And talk and stop talking and pace. He’ll pace the same floor not saying anything for 20 minutes. He’ll pace around peoples chairs. He’ll pace on the table. He’ll kick paperwork away like a cat on said table. The team tried to fix this by saying Tony can move but he can’t use his feet. Which resulted in everyone groaning and collectively putting their heads in their hands when Tony does a handstand and starts moving UPSIDE DOWN.

-Tony is high-key into yoga and keeps it a secret. Until he and Rhodey are caught in a “double wide boat” pose


These are all I can think of for now. But anyone can feel free to add on~

sherlock probably does yoga in his pants once a week awkwardly on the floor in his room because he cant be bothered to move the lamp out of the way

Flexibility

Originally posted by marvelouspond

Summary: Dean x Reader - Dean walks in on the reader doing yoga and challenges her when she is steadfast in it helping her be a better hunter.

Triggers: none (hints at smut)

Word Count: 3413

Y/N = Your name

— 

“All that stretching doesn’t seem to be making you any taller,” Dean’s voice came from behind you as you tried to focus on your downward dog pose. His smooth voice sending shivers up and down your back as you tried not to tense your muscles and show how much you reacted to his presence.

It was harder than it should have been considering how long you’d been working on perfecting your poses. Sighing you slowly corrected your pose with an long exhale and moved into a standing forward bend, holding onto your ankles as you turned your eyes towards Dean from your mat.

The hunter was upside down from your current angle, leaning against the doorframe of the impromptu training room. Even upside down he was devastatingly handsome. It was kind of hard to properly see him as strands from your ponytail covered your eyes, but it was still clear to you that it wasn’t the pose he was admiring as his eyes followed your legs up to your ass and back down your thighs to finally look you in the eye.

“It’s not about stretching to become longer Dean,” You said, feeling slightly dizzy from having to focus on the hunter whilst upside down. At least that was what you were telling yourself. Though you knew the truth was that his eyes burning into you like that always made you a little light headed.

“Then what is it about?” Dean seemed to remember how to talk when you finally straightened up your body and turned to face him between your poses.

“I do yoga to relieve stress and relax,” You said, getting down on all fours to go through your normal routine once more, hoping to clear any thoughts of love and possible heartache out of your mind through your yoga.

Table, cat, cow, modified cobra and then into half downward dog before repeating the two steps Dean had walked in on you doing. That was your routine twice a week; the other days you did the more intermediate moves. You weren’t lying when you said it helped you relax.

Your job description wasn’t the most common in the world, being a hunter of all things big and bad and all that. But it was definitely stressful.

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You’re flexible (GOT7)

JB: -you just moved unnaturally as you were play wrestling with one of the boys and your arm bent so awkwardly behind your head. Everyone was sure you broke it but then you simply moved your arm back into normal position saying it happened a lot- “what kind of wizardry is this? How are you fine?”

Originally posted by jaeckbum

Mark: -you were a gymnast when you were younger and when you got older you still liked to be flexible. So when you were stretching before a run with Mark you started out normal. Then you began to split Mark was shocked and heating up at the same time- “um that was so hot”

Originally posted by choijaes

Jackson: -you did it to tease him because you knew he wasn’t as flexible. So when you did a back walkover out of boredom all the boys were shocked. Jackson was more or less jealous- *gif* 

Originally posted by asprinkleofkpop

Jr: -you were rather bored and at this point you were doing things you didn’t know you were doing. When Jinyoung looked over you were split and just looked uncomfortable so he got worried- “what is she doing? Is she alright? That looks extremely painful”

Originally posted by wenwee

Youngjae: -he loved your flexibility it often left him out and bothered and when you did it at dance practice because everyone else is stretching you decided to before you got bored and said you had to leave- “no come babe stop doing this to me. You can’t leave me here like this?”

Originally posted by markjin

BamBam: -you were a lazy person so people never really saw you do anything overly flexible. When you were laying on the floor BamBam went to help you up but you instead did a forward roll to stand up and he couldn’t believe it- “wait what happened my jagi she never does stuff like that”

Originally posted by k1ttyhun

Yugyeom: -you started doing yoga which meant he got to see the yoga clothes  that hugged your body. Being a teenage boy he was always thinking dirty things when he saw you do different poses. When you went to talk to him he was responding at all just staring until you smack him- “what sorry I was in my happy place watching you”

Originally posted by gotsolucky

anonymous asked:

Headcanons for Tfa prowl,mtmte rung,Rodimus,and drift for a deaf human s/o who they meet for the very first time?

I, myself, am slightly deaf, that’s why I know sign language. Despite this I’m still not sure I did this justice.

{TFA}

Prowl
~He’s also sure to keep you on his shoulder or within his sights. He’s afraid that being unable to hear the danger puts you in it. He’s not really wrong either.
~He didn’t know sign language when you met so it was a lot of writing down on paper or talking evenly and calmly so you could read his lips.
~One day you’re signing to him while talking and he just signs back, though a bit nervous and definitely new.
~He’s so happy that he did well and you understood!
~He’s also happy that you’re happy. He didn’t realize organics could light up like that.
~He doesn’t outwardly show how excited he is to be learning sign language and doing well with it, but the guy is practically giddy on the inside.
~He always makes sure to have cc on, on the tv. If something doesn’t have cc and you really want to watch it, he figures out how to make his own. Even if that means doing something that may or may not be ambiguously illegal.
~He likes to meditate with you, he finds it an excellent bonding experience as well as very relaxing. If you’re not up to meditation and you just want to nap because you’re eyes are tired from all the sensory overload, he enjoys letting you sit in his lap while he meditates as well.
~He doesn’t mind starting up his holoform to help you order things or talk to someone.

{MTMTE}

Rung
~The moment he learned a deaf human would be on board he spent hours learning sign language, after figuring out which version of sign language he should learn.
~He doesn’t talk to you much until he’s got it almost entirely down and can have a conversation with you.
~He’s the first bot to say hello and ask you how you are with his hands, it’s exciting to see someone care that much. It’s what drew you to him.
~He enjoys just laying with you in dimly lit rooms. If you want to talk, your hands are both moving the whole time. If you don’t want to talk the silence is pleasant as he holds you against his chassis or neck.
~He likes looking into your eyes, they hold so much expression he hardly sees the need for you to speak at all.
~You being deaf does worry him, you can’t hear the dangers around you and you can’t head spoken warnings. He doesn’t like for you to be out of his sight unless you’re around bots he can trust to pay attention.
~He’s better about giving you your independence than the other bots as long as he can reach you or someone he trusts can, so they can get you out of harms way if they need to.
~When it comes to the sensory abuse on your eyes he will turn off lights and hum with you on his chassis. He hums so his body lightly vibrates and soothes you. He may also gently rub your back with two digits.

Rodimus
~He has no idea what the frag you’re doing waving your hands like that. Stop it, it’s weird.
~Oh… That’s how you communicate? I don’t know what you’re saying.
~He is so confused, save him.
~He probably gets Rung or Drift to teach him sing language, since they learned it the moment they figured out a deaf human would be on board.
~He’s very bad at it. Super bad. But he’s trying his best.
~He even tries to show you how good he’s getting, you can understand some things, but he’s still learning and just all around not that great at it. It’s endearing that he’s trying so hard though.
~He understands that sometimes you’re eyes take a beating because everything on that ship is super white, super artificial, and super bright, so he takes you into the habsuite, turns the lights off, and lets you lay on his chassis.
~He doesn’t mind if you fall asleep like that either.
~He also recognizes that you’re in greater danger because you can’t hear bots coming or going or even if one of them calls out for you to move. The thought of losing you scares him to death so you basically never leave his shoulder unless he’s on a mission, then you’re stuck with a baby sister.
~If you point out how much it hurts to be treated like a helpless child, he tones it down and figures out ways to give you independence and keep you safe all at once.

Drift
~He learned sign language as well, the moment he knew you’d be on board. He was both very interested in the aspect of talking with your hands and he wanted to get to know you.
~The first time he tried speaking to you with his hands he was so nervous he messed up and then panicked and tried to fix and really only just made it worse. It was actually adorable how flustered he got.
~He’s actually really good at it once he’s not a nervous wreck and he’s easy to talk to.
~He likes meditating with you and doing yoga. He especially likes to do those two activities in dim lighting to give your eyes a break from all the harsh lighting.
~If you don’t feel like meditating and you don’t want to lay in his lap he may just lay across the floor and watch you do whatever it is you’re doing. It’s more fun.
~If you don’t wanna do yoga he just does it by himself while watching what you’re doing. He’s less likely to watch you if you’re watching him. It’s a bit embarrassing.
~Similar to Rodimus he keeps you on his shoulder almost all the time. He’s lost too much due to his own fault. He won’t make you another.
~If you voice that you need independence he voices his fears.
~You talk through it together, hands often moving rapidly as if you’re arguing, your both just really excited. 
~You manage a plan to keep your independence and for him to keep you safe, which is a lot of him being able to see you or knowing who you’re around. He doesn’t keep you from anyone specifically, he just likes to know there’s someone in there watching you, since he’s not in there himself.

Elevator Troubles-Liam Dunbar

A/N- This is my first time writing for Liam! I hope it’s okay and that you all enjoy reading it!

Request- Can you make a imagine where y/n and Liam are stuck in the elevator and Liam teases y/n with kisses and stuff like that?

Word count- 1830

Warnings- None I Don’t think, protective older brother maybe.

“come on Liam” you giggled as you tried to struggle your way out of his tight grip “I’ll be twenty minuets max I promise” you smiled when you finally managed to roll out of his arms, letting out and ‘oomph’ when your body hit the floor of your room

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Hot Yoga (Steve Rogers x reader)

Hope it’s okay, @shamvictoria11!

Steve stood outside of the yoga studio, staring through the large window at the people bent awkwardly and twisting into positions that couldn’t possibly be comfortable.  His eyes were wide and you had some idea of what he was thinking, but it was the first time that your best friend was completely speechless in front of you since you met him.

“Are we the only two going to this?” he whispered, still staring straight ahead.  You could see him swallow heavily as he watched, laughing quietly to yourself at the sight of a nervous Steve.

“I think so, yeah.  It doesn’t seem like Tony took Christmas very seriously this year, huh?”

When he finally turned to face you, his body relaxed slightly at the idea that you might be just as unsure of this as he was, knowing that he wasn’t suffering with the thought of it alone.  “Are you sure you wanna go in there?”  He turned back and cocked his head to the side as he watched, “I don’t know if I can even bend that way.”

“Come on, you big chicken, we’re doing this.”  You grabbed his arm and pulled him into the studio, immediately hit with a wave of heat as you swung the door open.  “So ‘hot yoga’ isn’t some innuendo then?  It’s actually hot?”

Steve reached up to wipe a few small beads of sweat from his brow that had immediately begun to form, both from the heat of the room and the heightened sense of anxiety.  The instructor nodded towards you and pointed to a corner at the back of the room; a man of Steve’s size needed the space, but you were more than happy to be away from the center of attention and away from the window that faced the busy street.

“Unroll your mat over here, and I’ll go there.”  You began to set up, but the instructor was approaching with a broad smile on her face that you were certain appeared at the sight of Captain America in her studio. It happened everywhere you went together.

“Hello, welcome to our little class!” she exclaimed, holding her hand out to him and yet to acknowledge you. “It’s really an honor to have you here, Captain.”  She shook his hand so enthusiastically that his entire arm moved with her two hands that encompassed his.  He pulled his hand back quickly and reached out to you, brining you in tightly at his side.

“Thank you, we’re…happy…to be here.  Let’s get started then, shall we?”

Her smile dropped ever so slightly; so faintly that you may have missed it if you hadn’t been watching for it, surprised at yourself at how you felt satisfaction from her disappointment. “Absolutely, let’s get started!” She moved back towards the front of the room and brought the room to attention, no longer staring at Steve as she had been since he walked in.  “Alright, everyone, welcome to today’s couple’s session!  Let’s warm up before we get to the good stuff!”

You rolled your eyes and looked at Steve, who appeared to be holding his breath with his eyes squeezed tightly shut.  He turned his head towards you and opened his eyes slowly, doing his best to reign in his nerves in front of everyone.  

“Tony Stark is a dead man,” he hissed under his breath.  “Dead.”

~~~

“My hand goes where?”

“There’s no way I can bend like that.”

“I have to be the bottom plank, (Y/N).  I’ll crush you.”

“See?  I told you.”

“Okay, class, for the next pose we’re going to do the ‘down dog assist’.  One partner will be face down to the floor with their arms outstretched, and the other will mimic the same pose on top of them.  Watch here to see what it should look like.”  

As the instructor took on the pose with another member of the group, Steve sighed and shook his head, hesitantly taking his spot on the floor.  He looked at you with a smirk and a mischievous grin once he was in place, and you wondered if he might even be enjoying himself now.  

“Woof,” he whispered with a quiet growl.

“Stop it!” you mouthed silently, trying to hold in the laugh that was on the verge of escaping. Taking a long, deep breath, you lowered yourself onto his back and laid against him with your head next to his.  “This isn’t as uncomfortable as I expected,” you said quietly in his ear.

“I can feel your boobs on my back.”

“Steve!  Seriously?”

“Seriously!  I can.”

“If you don’t kill Tony first, he’s mine,” you grumbled as you pushed yourself up and off of him.  “And then you’re next.”

He rolled over and pushed himself up on his elbow, watching you take the next position on the floor next to him.  “Sorry,” he whispered, quickly moving to join you for the final move but pausing to remove his shirt first.  “Does it have to be so hot in here?”

“It’s called ‘hot yoga’, Steve.  I think the name really gives it away.”

“Sit facing each other,” the instructor began, “get really close together, and one wraps their arms around the other.  Now the one being supported leans back as far as they can…slowly…and when you come up together, greet with a kiss and then switch.”

Your eyes widened and you looked at Steve, who wasn’t appearing to be as shocked as you were. He wrapped his arms around your back and nodded, waiting for you to lean back.  If you thought you were nervous before, that was nothing.  You clasped your hands behind your back and began to lean, finding that your eyes were trailing down from his face to his chest and stomach until you were too far back to continue to enjoy the view.  

He held you there for a moment, watching your body stretch, trying to keep his mind from wandering too far from the present.  He never looked at you the way he was right now, and even though you couldn’t see him, you knew full well what was happening.  When he brought you back up to him was he going to actually kiss you? Did you want him to?  You didn’t have time to answer your own question before it was upon you.

Or rather, before Steve was.

“Alright,” he sighed, “enough.”  He pulled you up to him so quickly and urgently that you heard the instructor gasp from the other side of the room.  His arms wrapped around you forcefully, lifting you off the floor and onto his lap, your legs still wrapped around him.  You took his face in your hands when your lips finally met, hearing a contented and soft moan from his chest.  

“So, it looks like you two really enjoyed your first yoga experience?”

Steve stopped and sighed, leaning back slightly to give the instructor a look that should have made her fear for her own safety, but being Captain America, he toned it down but still easily made his point.  “Yes, we did,” he said flatly, moving you so he could stand and grab your hand to join him.

“I thought it was great,” you said to her with a smile, “I think we should do it again, don’t you, Steve?” Reaching up, you ran your finger along his jaw line and smiled coyly, turning to grab your mat and walk towards the door.  It was a shock how fast your relationship had just changed and how unexpected it was, but looking back at the expression of both surprise and longing on his face, you wondered why it had taken so long for you both to see it.

You grabbed your phone from your bag and hurried to shoot a text out before Steve joined you, deciding that maybe your threat to murder Tony Stark was a bit premature.

Thanks for the gift, Tony.  Best Christmas ever.  

I knew it.  I’m so good.

~~~

Two weeks later you and Steve decided to give the class another try, but the tone was completely different than your first experience.  To say you had been dating would be an understatement; you were in a full blown relationship and had been inseparable since that first day.

Steve carried you into the studio on his back, the two of you laughing so loudly that the class stopped to look at you and stared until you realized what you had done.  He gently lowered you to your feet and guided you to the back of the room, keeping his head down and his mouth shut.  You had to stifle your laugh as you rolled out your mat and began to stretch, seeing the red in his cheeks from the minor embarrassment.  How was he ever going to get through your plan to repay that annoying instructor for her untimely interruption at your last class?

“Okay, class,” she began, “now that we’re all here, let’s take our first pose-“

“Excuse me,” Steve interrupted, standing up to address the group, “if you don’t mind, since our first class, (Y/N) and I have found a few other poses and positions that we think you might enjoy more.”  He looked down at you and winked, and you immediately felt your face heating up under his gaze.  “I know we have.”

Yoga

Summary: Y/N walks in on Sam during his yoga morning. After he insists on her joining him things get a pretty heated between the two of them. 

 Characters: Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Reader 

 Warnings: NSFW, yoga Sam (because that deserves a warning) smut y'all just pure smut.

 Word Count: 2,520

 Request:  Your probably busy !! But I am bothered with yoga Sam….🙄 So I was wondering a Yoga Sam smut ☺️😊😏 - @castiellerblueeyed

 A/N: hope y'all enjoyed, this was difficult one to write. I know nothing about yoga, please be gentle! If their any errors towards the end forgive me, I was falling asleep while writing the ending. 

Originally posted by deanwnchestcr

Originally posted by cantscrubitclean

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anonymous asked:

Klaine, my roommate's boyfriend is staying over so can I please sleep on your floor

Ooooh *u*

Klaine Bingo: Sharing a bed

“Are you sexiling me?”

Kurt looks at Elliot in shock and betrayal.

“Come on, Kurt,” Elliot says gently, still holding a backpack and a Tupperware of cookies. “Adam just came back from Sussex, we haven’t seen each other in eons—”

“Two months.”

“—Eons, Kurt, and we need to get nasty, naked and noisy.”

"Assholes.”

“Yeah, they’re involved too.”

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anonymous asked:

Courfeyrac/Marius; Yoga class

[Don’t.]

[Stop.]

[Don’t look at his ass.]

[It’s weird.]

[Don’t do it.]

[Frick, Marius, don’t do it.]

[Just walk away, c'mon, you can do it, one foot in front of the other, left, right, left- is he smiling at me- shit merde scheiße mierda- ]

Marius lets out a truly pathetic yelp as he trips over a table of candles and sends them tumbling over him and onto the floor, his face colliding with a stack of yoga mats. Maybe if he prays hard enough, the floor will swallow him whole before-

“Marius? Jesus, are you okay?”

[Fuck.]

He looks up at Courfeyrac, who’s holding the bright pink yoga mat that was balanced oh-so-delicately on Marius’ nose just seconds before, and tries not to be flattered that he abandoned helping the attractive blonde pre-med to rush to Marius’ aid. Probably because he’s afraid of someone dying in his studio, but Marius will take what he can get.

“You know my name.” He says weakly, dazedly, and Courfeyrac shakes his head, smiling widely as he does so.

“Of course, how could I forget my favorite giraffe-limbed student?” Courfeyrac chuckles, and holds out his hand to Marius, pulling him to his feet. “Seriously, are you okay?”

“Peachy.” Marius straightens out his t-shirt, trying to play it off cool and ignore the various men and women aged twenty to sixty-three who are taking this class purely to ogle Courfeyrac and his partner, Enjolras. “I mean, it’s the stupid mats fault, really, and maybe if you wore looser pants I wouldn’t be so dist-” [stop talking, stop talking now] “-ant from my grandfather in fact I should give him a call I have seen the light I am going to leave and never return okay bye.”

Marius prepares to flee, turning on his heel, before Courfeyrac grabs his arm and stops him, smiling wider than Marius has ever seen him.

“Marius, do you wanna get some coffee sometime? Like, right now?” Courfeyrac grins, calling back to Enjolras, “Enjolras, you can cover for me, right?”

“If it means getting him out of my studio, hell yes.” Enjolras says, as he pulls his long blond curls back into a ponytail.

Courfeyrac rolls his eyes at his best friend, then turns back to Marius with a grin, shrugging sheepishly. “So, coffee?” He looks around then leans in to whisper conspiratorially, “I promise not to change into looser pants.”

And really, how could Marius say no?

#I want a fic where Zayn and Liam are pretty much in love #but neither makes a move #so they tiptoe around each other all the time #and then one day #Zayn accidentally wishes that Liam shows him Liam’s interested #but it sorta backfires #because Liam turns into a heavy flirt #the complete opposite of his usual self #he makes lots of blowjob innuendos #all his jokes can be taken sexually #he uses lame excuses to get naked in front of Zayn #and all that stuff


Listen! The crack/fluff hoe in me still needs this. Hear me out.

Liam and Zayn becoming friends because they have a friend in common, Louis. But not your usual “friend of a friend is a friend” they click so well, that Louis gets insanely jealous. That until he realises that Zayn has a massive crush on Liam and it’s mutual. Seriously, they act so coupley that Louis feels like his always third-wheeling. It’s the and reason why Louis is gagging 95% of the time. Maybe 98%. He isn’t so sure, since he’s busy, you know, gagging.

Despite all that, Louis is a great mate and he does try to help his disgustingly affectionate friends. Too bas that he feels like crawling up some walls and spinning his head 360° with how frustrating both Liam and Zayn can be. Zayn refuses to talk to Liam because he mostly sucks at this, and can’t be bold enough to ask Liam out. Liam dismisses everything as Louis pulling his leg, and doesn’t want to bother Zayn, or get his hopes up.

Fast forward through MANY failed attempts of getting them on a date that almost work. Still Louis doesn’t give up. Lou then invites both to do stargazing on an exceptional clear night (an interest the three of them have in common) and simply doesn’t show up at the agreed location. When Zayn calls him he says “you two better snog for an hour” and hangs up. Not only only hangs up, but he turns off his phone, the little shit.

So, after being tricked into a date, Zayn does try to ask Liam out. Awkwardly, but he tries. Like holding Liam’s hand to help him adjust the telescope, or trying to hold Liam’s hand when they’re curled side by side under a blanket.  Everything fails, of course, so Zayn’s really bummed and just accepts that’s not going to happen.

At some point, they see a shooting star. Zayn makes a wish (because Liam insists they have to do one, despite the star disappearing before Zayn can think of anything) and that’s when Liam starts acting flirty. Very flirty and using the worst pick-up lines ever. The very first one is “not as beautiful as you when you shoot” when Zayn comments on how beautiful a shooting star is. Zayn shrugs it off, and they leave after that.

Fast forward a few days to Liam acting really weird. Zayn soon notices that Liam everything turns into a reason for some ~suggestive suggestion~. Liam wants to go to a sauna, invites Zayn to wrestle shirtless on the floor, keeps intense eye contact when eating bananas, licks his fingers in the most lewd way known to humanity, etc. He also becomes 200% more clumsy, and his solution for everything is to take his clothes off.

[Zayn comes back into the living room with a flannel to help clean Liam]
Z: “Leeyum! What you’re doing?!”
Li: “I spilt ketchup on my clothes. Gotta wash them now.”
Z: “Yeah, on your shirt. Would you, please, put your trousers back on?”

Z: “Did you know Liam does naked yoga?”
Lo: “That’s— Never heard of him doing yoga before.”
Z: “But… I’ve seen him doing the whole thing! All… bendy and stretchy!”
Lo: “From the sounds of it, I think you mean you’ve seen the hole—”
Z: *holding a hand up* “DON’T. go. there.”
Lo: *smirks* “I actually think he wants you to go there.”

Despite that, Liam is still Liam. So even if he starts those, he always waits for Zayn’s action. He instigates, but he still waits for Zayn make something happen. And because we need a happy ending, Zayn’s wish wears off after he invites Liam to his place for a long chat. He talks about his feelings for Liam, explaining that he doesn’t want things to happen like this. All he needed was to be honest, thus breaking the spell(?). :’)

Bonus: when the spell wears off, Liam has no recollection being super extra around Zayn for the past month. That’s why he’s confused about finding himself sitting naked on Zayn’s sofa, covered in whipped cream and two cherries tied to his snake habitat.

ONE SHOT: Waking Up

Waking Up
Pairing: Clint Barton / Natasha Romanoff (Clintasha, Blackhawk)
Wordcount: 2404
DISQUS comments: enabled, visit permalink page to leave a comment


Clint shuffles through the hotel room. Locking the door is a reflex. He is three feet from the door and has already lost one shoe, his sock is half off and flopping from his toes like a sweat-stained cotton fish. The other shoe is being stubborn; it wants him to use his hands to take it off, and hell if he’s going to bend over right now and deal with shoe laces. He opts to leave it as is, and let the sock be a fish if it wants too.

His shirt is easier to deal with, at first. It comes off halfway, but he can’t seem to get it loose from his neck and right arm, so it bunches there. Pants, those are simpler. Unbutton, unzip, step on the hem with the stubborn irremovable needy damn shoe, and keep walking. Eventually they wriggle down enough to be kicked away from him, except for the leg getting stuck in the middle of that treacherous shoe and trailing him the remainder of the way to the bed.

Face down. Pillow smells like something artificial. Screw blankets, bare to the air is fine.

The niggling thought of something he should do, something important, some reason not to close his eyes, floats from the back of his head down to behind his eyelids, but it dissipates like ink in water and melds into the weight of his brain, forgotten.

He sleeps the kind of sleep that is more like passing gently into death than into rest.

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