100 letters - peter parker
fandom: the avengers/spiderman
word count: 1042
character pairing: tom holland’s peter parker x reader
warnings: kinda sad kina cute lol
prompt: friends don’t let friends do stupid shit alone. (taken from this prompt list)
notes: i rly lov this goofy man kfjvnsjf idk what this is but enjoy i guess lmaonlfvjajenfv (i also have zero clue where the gif came from bUt)
friends don’t let friends do stupid shit alone.
“i’m going to germany.“
you snort from your place curled up on peter’s bed, not bothering to look up from the book you were reading. "while you’re there, try some schnitzel for me, yeah?” peter blinked, confusion clouding his features before he rolled his eyes, realizing you thought he was joking. he took a seat on the bed next to you, leaning back so that his head was resting on your stomach. he looked at his cieling.
“i’m not- i’m not kidding,” you peeked at him over your book, eyes narrowing. “you remember that day tony stark was here? he asked me if i wanted to go to germany with him.” you carefully put down your book, not looking at him.
“for what? an internship?” you questioned, and peter winced when he detected the ice in your voice. “why’s he taking you to germany, peter."peter closed his eyes briefly, turning on his side as you adjusted yourself to sit up a little, looking down at him with a blank expression.
"he wants me to fight,” peter exhaled, not meeting your eyes. he felt you stiffen. “against captain america. it’s all going to- it’s all going to shit, Y/N. he needs me.”
“peter,” your voice was an octave higher than you wanted it to be. “peter, you can’t.” he sat up then, grabbing both your hands and leaning dangerously close to you. this wasn’t surprising to you; you knew more than anybody about peter’s lack of perception of personal space.
he could sense the panic rolling off of you like waves, hands squeezing his ridiculously hard. he didn’t show any signs of pain, only looking into your eyes with a type of intensity that made you feel like crying.
all you could imagine was peter lying dead on the concrete, his mask lying several feet away from him, torn and shredded to reveal his beaten and bloody face, eyes wide.
“they need me,” he breathed, eyes flickering down to your lips before meeting yours again. “they need me.” he repeated.
“i need you,” you exhaled, resting your forehead against his. it was getting ridiculously intimate between you two, and your heart couldn’t help but do somersaults in your chest. “what about me, peter? i need you.” he shut his eyes, and you could feel his forehead crinkle against yours.
“i don’t know what to do,” he whispered, nose slotting with yours. your breath caught in your throat, his lips millimetres away from brushing against yours. “tell me, Y/N. tell me and i’ll listen to you. tell me i can’t go, and i won’t go.”
and then you pulled back, taking your hands with you. “i can’t do that, peter,” you leaned against the headboard, pulling your knees up to your chest. “i’m not your mom, i’m not your aunt, i’m not your-” you broke off at his sudden intake of breath. “i’m not your girlfriend, peter.” i wish i was.
your lips parted, and you could feel your face heating up. you stood up quickly, snatching your sweater off the desk-chair and making a beeline for the door without meeting peter’s eye. you couldn’t do this, not now. you’d always thought of confronting your feelings for peter head on, but this was too sudden. dear god, you couldn’t do this.
and then there was a hand on your waist, spinning you around and lightly pressing you up against the wall. you looked up to see peter’s face inches away from your own. he hesitated a minute. “i’m not gonna take that back, in case you were wondering.” you found yourself unconsciously leaning closer towards peter, lips a breath away from his. you felt one of his hands find yours, and you didn’t hesitate to interlock your fingers, squeezing his hand tight.
“peter,” you exhaled in a needy whisper, hands making their way to his hips, pulling his body closer to yours. closeness with peter was no stranger to you. “this is gonna make leaving so much harder.” he was close enough that you could feel his heart hammering through his t-shirt.
“i know,” he said quietly, leaning down at the same time you leaned up, pressing your lips together in a way that had you fisting your hands in his t-shirt, definitely wrinkling the fresh-pressed material. but fuck, you had wanted this for so long, and everything was so perfect, until-
you pulled away from him, letting your head fall back and hit the wall. peter’s lips fell from yours, and you stayed completely silent as he breathed heavily, seemingly in disbelief.
“you’re leaving for germany soon,” you whispered, and went to meet peter’s eyes with a sad smile. “i should leave now.” peter stayed quiet, letting you slip out of his hands with a kiss to his cheek.
“please don’t go.”
you turned back to face peter just before you left his room, bracing your hand on his door frame, right where the white paint was chipped and peeling. you dug your fingernails into the soft wood, calculating the chances of you actually walking out of his apartment that night, if his puppy-dog eyes and heart-breaking expression had anything to say about it. your walk towards him was slow, but when your arms wound around his waist, your hug was tight.
“yeah, Y/N?” you buried your face into his shoulder, hiding your smile before pulling away and taking his hands, drawing him to his bed. the back of your knees hit the mattress, and you fell backwards, pulling peter down so he was laying next to you.
you turned onto your side to face peter, propping your head onto your hand. “i hope you own a fairly large suitcase.” he looked up at you, confusion etched into his features.
“and why is that?” he asked, still not catching on.
“well, cause i don’t have any suitcases, and i’m gonna need to put my clothes somewhere when we get on that plane to germany.” you rolled onto your back with a grin when peter sat up immediately, staring down at you with wide eyes. “oh, come on, peter. you know better than anyone; friends don’t let friends do stupid shit alone.”