haunted by the memories

Dig me no grave

Name: Dig me no grave

Author: Aya-Fay

Fandom: Gotham

Pairing: Victor Zsasz x reader

Warnings: AU.


Tags: @multi-villain-imagines @socktrollqueen @myregardstothereader @queencobblefreezestuff @cloama @animeo2l @gotham-city-tales   @jokesterwrites @luciebell-writes @rawrcoptergaming @taintedmarker @emberandshadow @cobblehearts  @awteitha @tangentasilem @miss-harleenquinzel @westfamilyfunction


Talk to me, guys.

Let me KNOW what you think <3

PS: Also let me know if you wanna be tagged in anything i write <3

Originally posted by twofacedharveydent

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LEO: You really don’t want to admit it, because it’s a pretty ridiculous thought, but you’re scared of what being fully healed from the heartaches you’ve experienced entails. Because you aren’t sure of who you are when you aren’t hurting and you don’t know how to observe the world with unclouded eyes. It’s okay to be apprehensive of the sides of yourself that you haven’t had many opportunities to become acquainted with. While you may know yourself better than anybody else, that doesn’t mean that you need to be an expert on all things you. It’s okay to still be in the process of meeting yourself and figuring out who you are. You aren’t racing the clock.

VIRGO: You’re finally embracing the things you’ve been talking about doing for so long, but something feels off about it and you don’t know why. Because isn’t this the thing you’ve been working towards? Isn’t this the life you pictured yourself living after pulling yourself out of the gutter and onto the grass? I don’t think it’s right to assume that you’ve made the wrong decision here, but it’s important to remember that not everything you wrap your arms around is going to feel soft and easy to swallow. Sometimes the right decision has to hurt in order for it to be the right decision. Soon you’ll know if there’s anything that needs changing.

LIBRA: I know that trusting your instincts after being led astray so many times is a difficult thing for you to wrap your head around. You’re not the type to forget about the poor decisions you’ve made, or the mistakes you’ve given life to. However, road bumps and wrong turns aside, you are still a person worth listening to. It may seem as though everybody else has a map showing them the route to success and that yours was lost in the mail, but I’m going to let you in on a secret: nobody has a clue, a lot of us are just really good at acting as if we are. You haven’t fallen behind, you’re running with the wolves.

SCORPIO: Everyone assumes that you have a lot of love in your life but, while it’s easy to pinpoint a handful of people that have handled your heart with the utmost care, it’s easier to identify those that haven’t. At the end of the night the latter is what plagues your thoughts and wrings the tears out of your eyes, and admitting to that seems like a sign of weakness. But I want you to know that you aren’t obligated to live up to the expectations that the world holds for you. You’re allowed to make your own goals and visit your own places of interest. And the people that can’t love you for that aren’t people that you need surrounding you, anyways.

SAGITTARIUS: You have a tendency to look for yourself in everybody you meet, stacking your personality traits up like chips in a poker game that you’re destined to lose. The problem here is that in order to do this it involves reducing yourself to the most basic of traits and that isn’t what you are. Just because you can rattle off a list of acquaintances that use humor to detract from a situation in the same way that you do, doesn’t mean that you’re a carbon copy conglomerate of the souls you’ve met and interacted with. You’re unique, and you’re a lot more than simply a list of shared qualities. There are parts of you that cannot be put into words.

CAPRICORN: Has anybody told you lately that they’re proud of you? I know that things have been piling onto your windowsill and that you haven’t had the energy to clean it off yet but you’re still standing tall and you’re still here and that’s something to be happy about. Celebrating the small victories isn’t something that you’re used to doing, but it’s time that you start; it’s time that you open your eyes to all of the things that you do on a daily basis that warrant praise and positive attention. An action doesn’t have to be monumental in order to be important. You do wonderful things each and every day.

AQUARIUS: It’s been difficult to get back into the depths of your passion because there’s a really loud voice in your head saying that it isn’t worth it. A feeling of insecurity welling up in your throat and spilling out of your mouth whenever you open it to speak. Sure, your dream is big. Cynics may have told you that it isn’t worth pursuing. But there’s a reason that you’re chasing what you are, right? It’s because it makes you happy, and it makes you feel whole. And I know that it can be incredibly discouraging to stumble over things you care about, but you just have to keep walking despite all of that. Your goals are worth it.

PISCES: Lately you’ve been haunted by the memories of people that only came into your life to take. The nightmares have become an almost regular guest in your bed, taking the sheets and kicking your shins every night like clockwork. I want you to know that what you need to do in order to gain closure over the unkind past seems terrifying because it is. I also want you to know that you deserve to move on from those that have harmed your growth in the past. It may seem impossible to reach a place of contentment with the situation you’re picturing as you read this, but you’re more than capable of surviving what’s follow you. Allow yourself to thrive.

ARIES: Taking care of yourself still feels foreign, sometimes. Acting adult-like is an oversized jacket that you’re familiar with shrugging off and leaving at home despite the weather that requires its presence. There’s too much societal and social pressure to be fully grown all of the time, in my opinion. Not to say that you shouldn’t be responsible, or that you don’t already take care of the things that you need to, but you’re able to reevaluate what it means to be a successful human being. You aren’t chained to standards or rules or cookie-cutter definitions of “being a grown-up.” Don’t lose touch with the roots that mean so much to you.

TAURUS: Another ending, another heartbreak, another name written through the steam on your shower wall. It isn’t fair that you give so much and still only get apple cores and empty promises handed back to you. I know you’re starting to wonder if it really is a “you-thing,” if the absences you’ve needed to learn to exist around were created by your own hands in ignorance. While most failed connections falter on both sides of a line, that doesn’t mean you’re allowed to be mean to yourself for things that aren’t exclusively your fault. Being kind to yourself is a practice that will benefit you more than you know. It’s okay to give yourself a break.

GEMINI: Happiness is a lover that always sends you postcards but never tells you when they’re coming home. You’ve grown so accustomed to their quick scrawl reading “wish you were here” that you can almost predict each cards’ arrival after every new bout of sadness. It feels like your emotions enjoy mocking you a lot of the time, making you cry over your latest heartache while reminding you of the moments in which you felt nothing but pure and unfiltered joy. I can’t guarantee the continuous presence of bliss in your life, but I will say in confidence that it’ll always come back to you. Even when you think it won’t. Especially then.

CANCER: It’s a lot easier to let the dying embers of a fire fade into darkness than it is to stoke them back to life. I know that you’re tired of crouching next to weak flames, watching them flicker and refuse to glow despite your best efforts, and for good reason. Everybody knows that you deserve better from the world, that isn’t a question. How could you, the big-hearted lover of love, be destined for something as ugly as this? The answer is that you aren’t. Large, beautiful, fulfilling things are on their way, slowly but surely. Don’t forget that it won’t always feel like this. You won’t always view happy moments as a quick reprieve from the norm. Promise.

Autumn ask🍂🍁

Autumn: What’s your favorite thing about Autumn?

Apples: What’s your favorite type of apple?

Apple Cider: What’s your favorite seasonal drink?

Apple picking: if you could go anywhere, where would it be and why?

Big sweaters: do you prefer the cold, warmth, or a perfect in-between?

Bonfires: Do you prefer going out or staying in on a fall evening?

Boots: Favorite pair of shoes/boots you own?

Black friday: what is one thing, if anything, you would sell your soul to own?

Candles: What’s your favorite fall scent?

Caramel Apples: Favorite Halloween candy?

Cozy blankets: where do you feel the most safe and at home?

Chilly air: what’s your least favorite and favorite type of weather?

corn mazes: do you have any secret talents/abilities?

Fairs: Have you ever been to a state fair? How was it?

Flannel: How many blankets do you sleep with in the fall/winter?

Falling leaves: you’re stranded on a desert island and here’s the twist; what three things do you NOT bring with you?

Fuzzy Socks: How do you spend a night in in the fall?

Halloween: Do you plan on going out for Halloween this year? And as what?

Haunted houses: what’s your scariest memory? (if you don’t have one/ don’t want to talk about it, what’s your biggest fear?)

Hay rides: if you could pick absolutely anything to be your form of transportation, what would it be?

Hot Chocolate: How do you make/order your hot chocolate?

Holding hands: do you believe in soulmates? 

Hot tea: when was the last time you kissed someone (if you haven’t had your first kiss, who would you like that first someone to be?)

Leaves: What’s your favorite color the leaves turn?

Mini pumpkins: How do you decorate for fall/Halloween?

Pumpkin: Do you carve a pumpkin for Halloween?

Pumpkin Spice: Is pumpkin spice worth the hype?

Pumpkin Pie: What’s your favorite autumnal dessert?

Rain: How do you spend a rainy day in?

Sweaters: What’s your favorite sweater?

Scarves: What’s your favorite album to listen to in the fall?

Scarves: if you could only wear one outfit for the rest of your life what would it be?

Smelly candles: what’s your absolute favorite scent?

Thanksgiving: what is something/someone you’re the most thankful for? any particular reason?

The color orange: do you have a specific song that reminds you of autumn? what is it?

Wool socks: what’s something you look forward to in fall?

Windy nights:if you could go to any concert whose would it be?

Please come & drop me a couple and then reblog so you can play too
Autumn Asks! Let’s get to know each other!

Hi friends! I feel like I don’t interact with you guys nearly enough and lately I’ve been extra in the autumn mood. Ask away please! :) 

pumpkin spice: what’s your drink of choice?

wool socks: what’s something you look forward to in fall?

falling leaves: you’re stranded on a desert island and here’s the twist; what three things do you NOT bring with you?

smelly candles: what’s your absolute favorite scent?

big sweaters: do you prefer the cold, warmth, or a perfect in-between?

halloween: if you could dress up as anyone/ anything and pull it off absolutely flawlessly, who/what would it be?

cozy blankets: where do you feel the most safe and at home?

hot tea: when was the last time you kissed someone 

flannel: what’s your favorite day of the year? is there a reason it’s your favorite?

chilly air: what’s your least favorite and favorite type of weather?

scarves: if you could only wear one outfit for the rest of your life what would it be?

apple cider: if you could throw a party, and invite absolutely anyone, who would they be?

haunted houses: what’s your scariest memory? (if you don’t have one/ don’t want to talk about it, what’s your biggest fear?)

fuzzy boots: if you could live in any year/era, which would it be and why?

thanksgiving: what is something/someone you’re the most thankful for? any particular reason?

black friday: what is one thing, if anything, you would sell your soul to own?

apple picking: if you could go anywhere, where would it be and why?

corn mazes: do you have any secret talents/abilities?

hay rides: if you could pick absolutely anything to be your form of transportation, what would it be?

the color orange: do you have a specific song that reminds you of autumn? what is it?

windy nights:if you could go to any concert whose would it be?

holding hands: do you believe in soulmates?

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Before you go
Could you check for that monster under my bed


I think you left it here the last time you left
Because I couldn’t for the life of me get any sleep that night


And if you’re going to leave
I’d appreciate if you take all of you this time


I can’t handle being able to feel a piece of you
But not be able to see or touch it

Dear Chairman.
I am disappointed by your decision to press charges, but I am not surprised. My only hope is that the courts will see the matters differently than you have. You see, I never had the chance to serve in battle, nor did fate provide me the opportunity to sacrifice myself for humanity as it did for so many others in the Great War. Someone extremely dear to me was lost very early in my life. My mind has always plagued me with the question, if the choice had been placed in my hands, could I have saved her? The memory of her, has haunted me my entire life, and moreso in these last few years than I could ever have imagined. But given the events of these past few weeks, I feel confident that had I been given the chance, I would have made those sacrifices myself. Had I only the chance.
I know that you disagreed with my methods, and that others will as well. This is beyond my control. However, I cannot imagine that any court, would be able to convict me, no matter how low their opinion of my actions might be. You must understand one basic fact for all this to make sense my dear Chairman. These A.I., they all come from somewhere; they are all based on a person. Our Alpha, was no exception. And while the law has many penalties for the atrocities we inflict on others, there are no punishments for the terrors that we inflict on ourselves. So you send your men. They won’t find themselves a fight. They’ll only find an old man. An old man tired, but satisfied he did his duty. An old man weary from a mind more filled with memory, than it is with hope.
Sincerely yours, the former director of Project Freelancer, Doctor Leonard Church.