There is something horrific going on in the kitchen cupboard. Four jars of marmite? Where the hell did four jars of that godforsaken stuff come from? Please can those family members who like the revolting spread please get on and eat it so this blight can be removed.

Win #5 - A Six Month Supply of Marmite and an Oven Glove (Runner Up)

I was extremely excited when I arrived home last night to find a little note informing me that I had a parcel.

I scooted off down to the porters hut to hand in my slip and, in return, a medium sized brown parcel was popped into my paws.

It was heavy. That’s usually a good thing. Unless it turns out to contain a head.

Eager to examine the contents (and anxious to dismiss the head theory) I ripped it open. It was from Marmite! My Win #5! 

Ever wondered what a six month supply of Marmite looks like?

Well, it looks exactly like this (minus the oven glove): 

Even as a FIRM member of the ‘hate Marmite’ camp, I was impressed by the size of those huge jars.

I’m now thinking of creative ways to destroy the offending spread, though, judging by the drooling faces of my 'love Marmite’ flatmates, I very much doubt that there will be any left by the time that I get home!

Thanks, Marmite!