hateful slurs

in sixth grade my homeroom teacher caught this kid stephen saying,
“that’s so gay.”

so he told the class that for the rest of the week, anytime you wanted to express something negatively, you could say,
“that’s so stephen.”

and it started out as a joke, where even this stephen kid was going around using it, laughing at it, not really caring. it was funny, i guess.

but then one of his friends got a bad mark on a test and said,
“that’s so stephen.”

we had a blacktop recess and everyone kept saying,
“that’s so stephen.”

and when we got too loud doing groupwork and had to separate and work silently, everyone in the class kept muttering,
“that’s so stephen.”

and the weirdest part was that even though it was just a word we were using, even though it had nothing to do with stephen,
we all sort of blamed stephen.

and as everyone kept using “that’s so stephen,” all week, you could see stephen himself finding it less and less funny.
we played a game called “pamplemousse” in french class and everyone got stephen out right away if they could.
someone literally went and found one of stephen’s art projects when nobody else was around and ruined it so he had to start over.

and when my homeroom teacher found out about it, he sat everyone down and told us that it wasn’t okay to say “that’s so stephen” anymore. that the things we’d been blaming him for weren’t his fault and the things we’d been doing to him weren’t fair.

he told us that stephen couldn’t help it that he was stephen. he didn’t choose to be stephen. he was born stephen.

and that’s when it clicked.

we all felt pretty stupid, i think, for sort of falling for it, but i’ll be damned if i’ve ever had a teacher get a lesson across so utterly and completely as mr. bernard did.

it hadn’t even been the full week.

terrifying your own child into submission makes you an abuser.

watching your child cry and screaming at them to stop and invalidating their pain and reasons for crying makes you an abuser.

staring at your child in disgust and contempt after they displease you makes you an abuser.

threatening to your child to take away their basic resources if they don’t give you exactly what you want makes you an abuser.

forcing your child to feel ashamed for not living up to your ideals makes you an abuser.

using slurs, hateful names and insults on your own child without any regard to what it does to their mental health makes you an abuser.

forcing your child to chase impossible expectations and making them feel like they’re worthless for not achieving them makes you an abuser.

acting like your child is a burden and a waste of space and blaming their illness/disability/depression on it makes you an abuser.

behaving like your child will never amount to anything and isn’t worth any resources and nurturing makes you an abuser.

making your child feel like they’re never good enough makes you an abuser.

if your child’s heart is hurting because they know no matter what they do and how hard they try they will always be a failure in your eyes, you are an abuser.

if your child can’t look at themselves without self hatred because they had to look at themselves from your perspective and all they saw is disgust and hatred, you’re an abuser.

If your child is struggling to believe they have the right to live and to be cared and loved, if they can’t stop hearing your hateful voice putting them down and using their every action to prove they’re worthless, you’re an abuser.

If you watched your child in pain and assured them they deserved it, you’re an abuser.

If your child can’t love themselves from how badly you hated them, you’re an abuser.

Musical Theatre Genres

Murder/romance shows

  • Heathers
  • Bonnie & Clyde
  • Dr Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
  • Sweeney Todd
  • A Gentleman’s Guide to Love and Murder
  • Chicago
  • Little Shop of Horrors

Biographies of Famous Dead People

  • Hamilton
  • Evita
  • Elisabeth
  • The Pirate Queen
  • Here Lies Love (Imelda Marcos is alive, but I don’t have a category for biographies of living people)
  • Zelda
  • Gypsy
  • Bloody, Bloody, Andrew Jackson

Historical Events

  • Newsies
  • Come From Away
  • Eastland

Disney

  • I won’t list everything.
  • Anastasia is an honorary member of this category

It Was Your Entire Childhood Probably (not to be confused with Disney)

  • Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
  • The Sound of Music
  • Annie
  • Starlight Express

Oh No We Are All Social Minorities

  • Rent
  • Next to Normal
  • Fun Home
  • In The Heights
  • Ragtime
  • Dear Evan Hansen (here because mental illness)
  • Bare
  • Falsettos

Straight White People in Love

  • ok a few of the earlier ones could fit in here also
  • The Last 5 Years
  • Lalaland
  • Hello, Dolly!
  • If/Then (it’s about her love life lots so this is where it fits best)

Let’s Take Advantage of a Famous Band/Musician Being Famous and Make Their Songs Into a Show

  • Beautiful: The Carole King Musical
  • Mamma Mia!
  • Sunshine on Leith
  • Across the Universe
  • Movin’ Out
  • On Your Feet
  • American Idiot
  • Jersey Boys

Edgy™

  • Spring Awakening
  • Avenue Q
  • The Book of Mormon

They Were Famous Enough Books/Movies/Plays to Make It Seem Reasonable to Make Them a Musical

  • Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812
  • Groundhog Day
  • Miss Saigon
  • Les Misérables
  • Amélie
  • Merrily We Roll Along
  • The Lightning Thief
  • Wicked
  • Legally Blonde
  • The Phantom of the Opera
  • Rebecca
  • Shrek
  • Spongebob
  • Big Fish
  • Waitress
  • Be More Chill
  • School of Rock
  • West Side Story
  • Jane Eyre
  • Billy Elliot
  • Matilda
  • Young Frankenstein
  • Jesus Christ Superstar
  • literally everything not on this list and some others that are already let’s be real

Cats

(thanks to everyone for pointing out things I didn’t know to add.)

"Why don't you just come out?"

Because when I was 5, my aunt said, “Oh, you must be John’s girlfriend, because you like to play with him! You two are so cute together!”

Because when I was 7, my grandpa came out as gay, and suddenly nobody in my family wanted to visit him anymore.

Because when I was 10, my parents told me that I could have girls come to my sleepovers, but not boys.

Because when I was 12, my grandmother took me to church with her, and when the priest said that all gay people went to hell, she nodded along.

Because when I was 13, I was called a dyke for daring to have short hair.

Because when I was 14, I came out as bisexual to a lesbian friend, and she told me, “Well, I mean, it’s not like you’re REALLY gay. It doesn’t really count”.

Because when I was 15, I was finally given the right to marry whoever I wanted to, and people were angry with the Supreme Court.

Because when I was 16, a man went to the Pulse nightclub and murdered 49 latinx queer people in cold blood, and people tried to say that it wasn’t a hate crime.

Because by the time I turned 17, I had been told time and time again that I don’t belong, that I’m too gay for one community and not gay enough for another.

things cis people say

“wait ur nonbinary? I thought you were trans!”
“But using your pronouns are hard!!”
“Cis is a slur!!!”
“I hate those trans people who always make a fuss!”
“Is that a man or a woman? *uses it/its*”
“I’m alright with trans people, I just hate those fake genders”
*Insert 500 transphobic jokes*
“They’re just jokes oh my god! You’re so sensitive”
“Lmao men in dresses are so funny”
“But what if a man says he’s a woman and sneaks into the bathroom to assault people”
“you’re pretty cute for a trans man/woman”
“which bathroom do you use”
“what’s in your pants”
“are u pre op?”
“How do you have sex?”
“so technically you’re a (insert assigned gender)”
“So she- well, she thinks she’s a boy but I’ve known her for a long time so it’s okay”
“I’ve never met a trans before !!”
"i can misgender you cos you’re a cunt”
“you’re not even trans”
“But you don’t look trans!”
“I wouldn’t date a trans, I’m just not attracted to them”
“i identify as a dog LOL !!!”
“transgendered”
“down with trans”
“Cisphobia is just as bad as transphobia”
“how can you hate someone just for being transphobic?”
“down with cis is harmful”
“dysphoria cant be that bad”
“down with hate”
“I’m not transphobic my sister’s friend’s cousin’s nephew is trans!”
“You transgenders will say anything’s transphobic”
“im not transphobic i thought i was trans 
"are you sure you’re not just butch?”
“you’re too young to know your’re trans!”
“you’re too old to know you’re trans!”
“why is being trans suddenly a trend?”
”*t-slur*“
"i can say that i have a trans friend”
“this is (birthname) she thinks she’s a boy!”
“oh she’s playing dress up”
“i’ve never dated a trans but i’m up for experimenting”
“i can say that i have a trans friend”

I’m just saying, if you’re white, call yourself a feminist, and find yourself getting defensive over the term “white feminism,” you should probably reconsider your priorities.

Let me clarify: just being white doesn’t make you a “white feminist.” You’re a “white feminist” if your feminism isn’t intersectional. If you’re only prioritizing issues that apply to white, cisgender, heterosexual women, your feminism isn’t intersectional.

Issues like sexual harassment + assault, reproductive rights, and the wage gap are important, but they’re not the only issues out there (and in certain cases, as with sexual assault and the wage gap, they’re significantly worse for non-white women).

Our trans, queer, and WOC sisters are out there getting murdered just for existing. Our immigrant and refugee sisters are being denied human rights and safety. Their problems might not apply to us, but we have a platform that is denied to many others. The least we can do is use it to help them.

Threaten my livelihood, don't be surprised when I come at you harder.

This happened a few years ago and it’s somewhat lengthy but I’ll try and keep it reasonable. TL;DR below.

It all started when I moved to Nevada with my dad because my parents had divorced relatively recently and he wanted me to stick around and help him with my younger siblings. He is the hardest working man I’ve ever met, and I didn’t have anything really going on besides kind of roaming, so when he asked if I could move in with him and just kind of be there for my little brother and sister in exchange for room and board, I wasn’t going to say no.

Anyway, we ended up moving to Nevada in our travels because he was in the mining field and there happened to be a mine there.

A little later on, he hooked me up with a job at the mine too. Nothing special, just working in the warehouse doing various duties. It paid well though and I was pretty strapped for cash so I was glad for it.

I actually enjoyed it for the first 2ish months.

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