Confession: i am only doing uni because, well, i don't want to not do uni. does that make sense? So i spend my days just going through the motions of doing uni work, handing in assignments, all the while living in an alternative reality in my head where i'm doing fun things. And three years have passed in that way. Ever feel like you're just passing time, in your head, and not even being fully present in your life? And that time is just pushing everyone forward and you are just standing still?
That makes sense bc I have felt the same! After high school it’s like what am i supposed to do with life - so it’s either work or go to Uni obviously (unless you have the fortune to do something else that drives you, or if unfortunately, you can’t do any of that). Do you only imagine having fun in your alternate world or do you have activities/hobbies to take a break from reality? Recently I’ve found fun in writing fanfictions, and believe it or not (because I do everything in my power to not study) first I like to research certain things, and think hard about making complex paragraphs and fun dialogues, it fills up my time and I get to produce something and share it. I like drawing too though I don’t do it much, and recently we tried embroidery at Uni and to my surprise I liked it and thought of picking it up sometime in the future (as a kid I hated it). Recently I was so into a game (mystic messenger), and before that an anime (yuri on ice) (- I still love both of them), and judging by my blog I’m trapped in drama-world. What I want to say is during your time that has passed can you come up with something you enjoy even if it’s very little?
I don’t want to be noisy because you probably already have your own ‘‘concept of life’’ figured out. We all, probably many times in life feel like time is not real and it’s just the same thing over and over. Sometimes I feel it often because writing ff or having a tumblr isn’t that special but it’s still something. If I were to give you advice then it is to start something new or find something you’re curious about or it can even be to read more about something you’re not so curious about. There’s nothing that is bad per se so go and explore. It can be off- or online, you may hate it or like it, won’t know until you try, right? Giving an ex. of mine then just two days ago while searching about a fave OTP I found something called ‘doujinshi’. I often stay off explicit stuff so basically I was fascinated and curious so I read thru some lmao and I love art so a plus for me woho. I won’t be making it my daily habit bc it’s not something I enjoy but I’m kind of ‘glad’ to have found something new. And then sometimes I just chill and waste time and go on with life because that’s one kind of activity too imo. Time is just something that’s supposed to pass and sooner or later we will— um, I feel like I’m going off topic….
Either way, I hope you soon start to feel your time is meaningful because life is short and I think people often get stuck in ‘I must do something meaningful’ when sometimes just eating food, helping a kid, smiling at some stranger (lol?) or waking up in the morning to start a new day can be something meaningful. Handing in assignments is an accomplishment too and in the future when you’re entering a new chapter it may all lead to a somewhat satisfying life.
I don’t get CaptainSwan ship at all. One might say I almost hate it.
And you probably don’t get SwanQueen ship, you might even hate it.
Shipping is one of the best things in fandoms. But the constant war between us, shippers, is disgusting.
HATE THE SHIP IF YOU WANT TO. (Or dislike strongly if hate is too strong word for you:P)
Hate the ship. Make fun of the ship even.
But please, DON’T SEND HATE TO SHIPPERS.
And no, that was not just to you CSers.
I hope that the wedding will be amazing and beautiful and all that. Enjoy it! We already saw the wedding gown and I think it looks pretty nice.
And yes SQers, I’m already excited about those fanvids where Emma and Regina get married. (Like those don’t already exist, but ya know, with Emma in her wedding dress, gonna be beautiful.) SwanQueen will always be endgame to me.
But I really hope the show will be good at least to its other ships. I mean if even you CSers can’t enjoy it, what’s the point of this show?
“Stop talking for a second and just… let me tell you something.”
I had this idea about if Keith and Lance got stranded in space and for some reason the team can’t get to them or doesn’t know where they are, and they think they’re gonna die so they finally confess to each other. 😏
But then the team finally comes and rescues them and they’re forced to actually deal with their feelings.
“Are you fucking kidding me,” Dean gasps. He pulls Castiel’s jacket off with both hands and doesn’t even bother shutting the door behind him. No point anyway. He bites down on Castiel’s lip without being cute about it.
“Dean,” Castiel hisses, helpless. His hands hover uselessly out to the sides as Dean pushes him deeper into his bedroom.
“‘I love you?’” Dean accuses, squeezing Castiel’s hips with those rough beautiful hands so hard that it would probably bruise anyone else. “Just like that, in front of everyone,” he says. He shoves Castiel down, hard.
Castiel bounces a little on the bed, right against Dean’s chest, quickly descending down on his. He looks like he was the one that got hit by a truck, eyes wide open in the oncoming headlights. “Dean.”
“Don’t,” Dean growls, ripping Castiel’s shirt open. Buttons scatter to the floor. His skin is pale, smooth, unblemished beneath the cotton. Soft and pliant where his nails dig into it. “You couldn’t even look me in the eye, you coward.”
Castiel can’t deny it or defend himself.
“Your last words,” Dean adds, dangerously close to a sob. “Were going to be…”
He pulls back from Castiel’s face and pants into his mouth. His nose brushes against Castiel’s in a kiss of its own. His lashes are wet.
“I love you,” he whispers.
Castiel reaches up and wraps his arms around Dean’s neck, drawing him into a hug. He knows, intuitively, that Dean isn’t repeating his own words from before. He’s just stating a fact.
And quite a personal one, from the way his lip quivers. The kind of fact that’s unwavering, heartfelt and secret but truer all the same as the seconds tick by, which makes it that much harder to confess to somebody else.
All the breath in Castiel’s body leaves him at once, painfully. Dean doesn’t give him the chance to say anything else before he surges forward again and kisses him, wet lashes cool against his skin. He’s gentler with it than before. His hands, still tacky with dried blood, come up to loosen Castiel’s tie. It slithers limply in his grip, cool and silky, and Castiel gasps when the fabric slides across his nipple. Dean bunches it in his grip against his knitted-back-together side.
“The… door,” Castiel sighs.
Dean turns his head and kisses his cheek. His ear. The bolt of his jaw. Dragging his warm, slack mouth along the rough skin of his neck. “Doesn’t matter,” he tells him.
That’s his serious voice.
Castiel swallows hard. Dean licks a long line up the column of his throat.
“Just be with me,” Dean pleads. His hands go to Castiel’s belt. “God, I really thought I was going to lose you,” he laughs, a little hoarse.
“I really thought I was going to die,” Castiel confesses, just on the right side of hysterical. He lifts his hips up just enough that Dean can pull his pants down over the swell of his ass. Castiel hesitantly reaches up and runs one hand through Dean’s hair.
He walks his fingers down until he’s cradling Dean’s face. Their eyes catch, and hold.
Without another word, Castiel starts divesting Dean of his clothing. They kiss and they kiss and they kiss until their faces rub raw with stubble burn and their lips are red and wet.
The door stays ajar, and the sounds of their hushed and anguished moans echo like old ghosts through the halls.
When you say a fandom is dead, it’s a bit of a blow to people who are still producing and enjoying work for that fandom. You’re basically saying what they’re doing doesn’t matter, doesn’t count, which might discourage them from continuing to participate.
If one person is creating content, the fandom isn’t dead.
If one person is consuming content, the fandom isn’t dead.
If two friends are chatting on skype about their OTPs, that’s fandom.
If someone doodles drawings of their favorite characters on a napkin, that’s fandom.
Just because someone is producing content for one fandom doesn’t mean they have to leave another.
Not every fandom can be the big, new, shiny and popular thing.
Not every fandom *should* be the big, new, shiny, and popular thing.
It’s okay to have small, tight-knit fandoms. They can be just as fulfilling and entertaining as the big ones.
Hi, 7goodangel. I am here to ask you about PaperJam as a shy, smol and innocent being (mainly thegreatrouge made him be). There has been some conflicts regarding his trait. Some said his canonical personality is a jerk, like what you wrote in his bio / info and some said that is severely wrong and being shy, (which made him shipped with Fresh), is his canonical personality. What are your thoughts about this? I mean, it is your character and people are taking control of it. Don't you disagree?
Well… I have talked to people and seen public
conversations and this has happened several times to me over months. I guess
I’ve gotten a little numb to it now… or maybe it’s due to school that I
haven’t given it the attention that it deserves. Probably due to school.
I just can’t update constantly like others - even though
some others in school were and are able to update constantly. I can’t keep
going around and holding up my bio of PJ and police people. It’s exhausting to
me… it really takes up the small bit of free time I have.
I think after I get a solid job that I’ll be able to go
around better… but anyway - back to your question.
While I love seeing interpretations and do not want people
to be limited by something and have their imaginations go forth… it’s proving
that a huge con comes with that mentality - which you have pointed out. A lot
of people swear that PJ is the cute, innocent interpretation that really, did
get PJ popular in the first place. While I did have him as a jerk from the
beginning - I kinda kept that info to my RP blog - so you could say it is my
fault this is all happening and I do think that. I could of done something to
make it not as bad as it is now…
It’s just like the NSFW stuff… people just assume the
first thing and run with it. And it really does make me feel like I really am
not needed for my own character at points.
It’s a struggle - I don’t want to have people stop
interpreting PJ within AUs… but I also don’t want people to just see him as
an innocent child to ship with Fresh.
And I’m still trying to find the best solution to it.
But… I feel like the damage is already done. It’s too late
for me to talk to all of these people going around swearing on their life that
PJ is canoncally like Rouge’s interpretation/AUs. It feels like an hopeless
battle to me.
And I guess I needed someone to ask me this question so then
I can fully say my thoughts on this.
So in short, while I love creativity and don’t want to snuff
it out (considering some people would probably think I’m doing that already
with saying “No Sin”), I still don’t like it. It irritates me, irks me,
frustrates me, and I feel like even as the person who thought of PJ in the
first place, my voice isn’t enough. Communities seem like they don’t care about
artists unless they reach a ‘certain goal of popularity’ or seem like they
have a more professional style of art. I know I do not reach either of those
People misspell my username all the time - I actually
claimed ‘7goodangle’ on tumblr for that reason.
People still say “I’m too lazy to find who made PJ”
when they clearly mentioned they looked at the bio on the wiki.
People still go around arguing others on the canon ship of
OmniPJ and swearing that FreshPaper is the true canon ship, when all people are
pointing out is that they need to keep the canon ship in mind when going around
Even just basic personality traits… and these things are
happening on sites that I do not nor want an account for.
I still want others to have fun - to be happy; but I don’t
know… I guess I’m cutting out my own happiness to get everyone else happy? I
want to eventually write a version of PJ within his own universe and story…
and he is more like the version I created within the UT verse. Not exact - but
close. Though who knows… I might shove PJ to the side and replace his role
with another character. I’m still weighing options.
Cause PJ was the first character I ever put this much time
and thought into… my first character that was balanced, well rounded…
And what happens?
You said it Anon.
They took it - changed it (initially as an AU but now people
think it’s canon) - and I can’t do much about it. Due to school and not much
free-time… due to how many don’t know the true creator… and just back
talking anyone who is just mentioning it to people who swear by it.
As an artist and a character designer…
It makes me not want to show designs, characters, and
stories ever again online.
Considering if this is how I was treated on the first one…
why even take a chance at a second one? If it has brought me so much stress,
frustration, and time… why even try it again?
I said I was only going to do fanart so if anyone stole it,
it didn’t really matter.
I think I should have stuck with that thought process.
In conclusion, there are some major things to take away
here. First – that yes, I do not like how it has skewed this far to the point
of arguing over a fandom version with the canon. Canon is canon and I get the
different AUs – this is too far. Way too far. I am emotionally drained from
this – from this whole mess that I have been defending throughout majority of
PJ’s lifespan. I will state this – Paper Jam is my character. He is my original
character that I created more than a year ago. And the UT AU fandom took my
character and warped him to something he is not and all of his original meaning
is lost. I do not like to hurt others or make other sad – but I must put my
foot fully down. This miscommunication needs to stop. I am tired of repeating
things over and over and I have past my breaking point time and time again. I
just want people to see PJ how he really is… and I wish that people could be
focusing more on the reality of him instead of the alternate that they all
claim as truth.
Final words: I still like Undertale – I still like creating
characters and having fun – but the Undertale AU fandom is ridiculous now. The Amino
UT community is insanity in an app, and there is a lot of stuff that has made
many artists and creators to their breaking point and leaving the fandom
entirely. Everyone in this fandom needs to take ten steps back and look at what
they are doing. Go back to the game. Play it again – watch your favorite let’s
player’s videos of it again.
And just… food for thought… please don’t jump the gun on someone else’s OC’s
personality and actions.
Sorry, I want to follow you but I'm a bit worried. You're not an anti, right? I'm a shaladin shipper so I wouldn't like to mistakenly follow an anti, even if they draw really pretty art (antis are scary, and mean)
I’m not quite sure what characters are all involved in the shaladin ship, but you are completely safe here. (And I’m a bit shocked that you think I’m maybe an anti, since I can’t remember that I said something against any ship.) I just stick to one ship per character and would call myself a “single”-shipper (not sure if I made it up or it is actually a term xD) but I would say it’s the counterpart to a multi-shipper!!
I’ve made a little guide with my lovely voltron babies ~ ♥
Well since I’m not a multi-shipper I could be wrong but I think it is somehow like that ^^. It doesn’t mean they love all ships, they see more ships than just one or two.
Context: Our group was on the way to a town a bit farther away. Our Rogue did not want to walk all the way, so e suggested to simply wait for a carriage and hijack it. The first few carriages are dismissed by the whole party, by the last one, the rogue is getting desperate and definitely wants to hijack it.
The carriage turns out to be a man and his obviously pregnant wife. They consider to stop, but don’t. We then get informed that this might be due to the presence of a gnome (me) and their fear of changelings.
Me: So, what shall we do, throw me at the woman? Rogue: That’s a great idea. (Turning to DM) I wanna throw the gnome at the wife. DM: (turns to me) Okay, roll for Initiative then, to see of you have the chance to struggle… Me: Actually, I am totally okay with getting thrown at the wife. DM: …You’re okay with it. Alright (turning to Rogue) roll for strength then. Rogue: (completely messes up the strength roll) DM: So, the gnome is not even close to getting thrown at the wife. Roll for reflex. Me: (rolls a nat1) So that means what now? DM: You hit the wheel face first and get stuck in it. The carriage is still going further. Half-orc: Well, I step in front of it. DM: That makes the carriage stop. (turns to me) Roll again to see if you can free yourself. Me: (rolls a 2) So, I’m still stuck. DM: Yes.
Next is the clerics turn, who gets me out of the wheel. The DM then explains what the carriage’s driver will do.
DM: So, the driver whispers something to his wife, who goes into the back of the carriage. He then hits the horse so hard it rears and starts galloping away. (to the half-orc) What do you do? Half-orc: I stay where I am. DM: …(sighs) Roll for reflex. Half-Orc: (rolls a 2) DM: …So, you try to jump out of the way, but stumble, fall down and get run over. You probably should get someone to heal you. I can’t believe it, we’ve been playing for an hour and a half, we haven’t even really started the campaign yet, but you already got two people seriously injured.