has taken its toll on me

Soft

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: you have so many heroes
and the world has so many more.
let him be soft,
and let him be mine
.” (x)
Words: 1,176
Warnings: language
Notes: honestly idk either and this could damn well be about stucky but hey pls read the thing this is based on it’s like my fave thing ever??


Originally posted by pandasubaru


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This is part one of ?? ask memes containing 00′s lyrics.  This post contains mainly popular top 40 pop songs.

‘  a girl like you is impossible to find  ’
‘  ain’t no other man but you  ’
‘  and in the back of your mind i know you should be over me  ’
‘  been fueling up on cocaine  &  whiskey  ’
‘  best thing about tonight is that we’re night fighting  ’
‘  boys just come  &  go like seasons  ’
‘  can’t seem to get you off my mind  ’
‘  come  &  rest your bones with me  ’
‘  did we get hitched last night?  ’
‘  do you see how much i need you right now?  ’
‘  don’t tell me you’re sorry cause you’re not  ’
‘  don’t you ever for a second get to thinking you’re irreplaceable  ’
‘  fairytales don’t always have a happy ending,  do they?  ’
‘  feeling like i’m heading for a breakdown  ’
‘  how do i feel this good sober?  ’
‘  how long will i be waiting to be with you again?  ’
‘  i bet you’re hard to get over  ’
‘  i can have another you in a minute  ’
‘  i can’t look at you while i’m lying next to her  ’
‘  i don’t wanna be anything other than me  ’
‘  i don’t wanna be anything other than what i’ve been trying to be lately  ’
‘  i drove for miles  &  miles  &  wound up at your door  ’
‘  i have the tendency of getting very physical  ’
‘  i haven’t seen the sunshine in three damn days  ’
‘  i hope you know that this has nothing to do,  it’s personal  ’
‘  i hoped you were coming home to stay  ’
‘  i just called to say i love you,  come back home  ’
‘  i just called to say i want you to come back home  ’
‘  i keep her coming every night,  so hard to keep her satisfied  ’
‘  i know i left too much mess  &  destruction to come back again  ’
‘  i know i tend to get so insecure  ’
‘  i know you think that i shouldn’t still love you  ’
‘  i never thought i’d need you there when i cry  ’
‘  i promise i’m not trying to make your life harder  ’
‘  i said see you later boy  ’
‘  i swear i’ll change my ways  ’
‘  i think i’ve already lost you  ’
‘  i think you’re already gone  ’
‘  i wanna take a ride on your disco stick  ’
‘  i want to make you feel beautiful  ’
‘  i was off to drink you away  ’
‘  i wonder if i’ll ever change my ways  ’
‘  i would’ve stayed up with you all night had i known how to save a life  ’
‘  if i just lay here,  would you lie with me  &  just forget the world?  ’
‘  if your heart is always searching, can you ever found a home?  ’
‘  if you’re gone,  maybe it’s time to come home  ’
‘  is there anyone out there cause it’s getting harder  &  harder to breathe  ’
‘  it’s not always rainbows  &  butterflies,  it’s compromise,  it moves us along  ’
‘  it’s personal,  myself  &  i,  we got some straightening up to do  ’
‘  it’s time for me to go home  ’
‘  it’s time to be a big girl now  &  big girls don’t cry  ’
‘  it’s too late to apologize  ’
‘  it’s your fault you didn’t shut the refrigerator,  maybe that’s the reason i’ve been acting so could  ’
‘  i’ll be your best friend  &  you’ll be my valentine  ’
‘  i’ll do what it takes  ’
‘  i’m bringing sexy back  ’
‘  i’m going home to the place where i belong  ’
‘  i’m in love  &  always will be  ’
‘  i’m leaving,  never to come back again  ’
‘  i’m not crazy,  i’m just a little unwell  ’
‘  i’m not going to write you a love song  ’
‘  i’m not ready to make nice  ’
‘  i’m still mad as hell  ’
‘  i’ve had you so many times,  but somehow i want more  ’
‘  let’s get this party started  ’
‘  let’s talk this over,  it’s not like we’re dead  ’
‘  make them boys go loco  ’
‘  my heart is full  &  my door’s always open,  you come anytime you want  ’
‘  please,  just cut it out  ’
‘  she acts like summer  &  walks like rain  ’
‘  she always belonged to someone else  ’
‘  she listens like spring  &  she talks like june  ’
‘  shut up  &  put your money where your mouth is  ’
‘  since you’ve been gone my worlds been dark  &  grey  ’
‘  so much for my happy ending  ’
‘  some things in this world you just can’t change  ’
‘  some things you don’t need until they leave you  ’
‘  spare me your frickin’ dirty looks  ’
‘  steal some covers,  share some skin  ’
‘  tell me,  boy,  now wouldn’t that be sweet?  ’
‘  that’s what you get for waking up in vegas  ’
‘  they say time heals everything,  but i’m still waiting  ’
‘  this is not what i intended,  i always swore to you i’d never fall apart  ’
‘  this love has taken its toll on me  ’
‘  this shit is bananas  ’
‘  times square can’t shine as bright as you  ’
‘  tonight will be the night that i will fall for you over again  ’
‘  welcome to the real world  ’
‘  we’ll be playmates  &  lovers  &  share our secret worlds  ’
‘  when you look me in the eyes  &  tell me that you love me,  everything’s alright  ’
‘  when you’re gone the pieces of my heart are missing you  ’
‘  where did i go wrong,  i lost a friend  ’
‘  wish i had a good girl to miss me  ’
‘  you can hold my hand if you want to cause i wanna hold yours too  ’
‘  you got me twisted  ’
‘  you look so dumb right now  ’
‘  you put on quite a show,  really had me going  ’
‘  you reminded me of brighter days  ’
‘  you should turn yourself around  &  come on home  ’
‘  you’re so ugly when you cry  ’

Anti-Valentine’s Day Starters

Some taken from songs. Feel free to edit as needed!


  • “The only thing I care about is that on the 15th, all the candy will be half-off at the supermarket.”
  • “You promised me heaven, then put me through hell.”
  • “What’s even the point of trying to find someone at this point?”
  • “I swear if Cupid dares come near me I’m gonna punch that little sucker in the face.”
  • “Go on and just cry me a river!”
  • “It’s Singles Awareness Day, so be aware of me.”
  • “You told me you love me, why did you leave me all alone?”
  • “If I’ve learned anything from last year, Valentine’s Day sucks.”
  • “No way I’m going to that stupid Valentine’s dance, especially without a date!”
  • “My last breakup was really painful, I’m still recovering.”
  • “I’ve got to get away; you don’t really want anymore from me.”
  • “All that mushy-gushy stuff makes me wanna vomit!”
  • “I just really don’t wanna talk about it.”
  • “Who needs a boyfriend/girlfriend when I’ve got a friend like you?”
  • “Loving you isn’t the right thing to do.”
  • “I even made him/her a homemade valentine that says, ‘You’re dead to me.’”
  • “Whatever, you’re so much better off without him/her anyway.”
  • “This love has taken its toll on me.”
  • “Valentine’s Day is in a week and I just got dumped!”
  • “Why are all the candy hearts so sappy? I want one that says, ‘I hate you.’”
  • [text]: I just ran into my ex at the mall. Kill me.
  • [text]: I’ve been crying to Adele for the past hour, how are you?
  • [text]: I need someone to vent to about my ex. You up?
Distractions

Pt. 1 || Pt. 2 || Pt. 3 || Pt. 4 || Pt. 5 || Pt. 6 || Pt. 7 || Pt. 8 || Pt.9 || Pt. 10 || Pt. 11 || Pt. 12

Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Angst

Summary: You were always there for him. You cheered him on, supported him, but apparently, you were just a distraction.

Word Count: 1548

Originally posted by bwiseoks

“I’m sorry” were the last words you could ever remember him telling you. 

That day you were so fired up with feelings of anticipation and excitement; it was only a few days before your boyfriend was to debut after all. For as long as you could remember, music always had such a strong grasp on Yoongi’s heart. He practically breathed music, hell he probably was made of music itself. 

You had always known about how his parents didn’t take too kindly of his passion for music, but you had always been there for him. You, along with his older brother, were the only support he had until he auditioned for an entertainment company called BigHit. Although he placed second in his audition, he still managed to grab a spot as a trainee. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration if you were to claim that you were beyond ecstatic. You were practically bouncing off the walls when Yoongi had told you that he had made it. 

You both knew what it meant for your relationship when he became a trainee. He had to work hard and spend most of his time moving towards his dream. This meant less time spent with you, but you knew how much this meant to him. You loved him so much that you prepared yourself for the lack of dates, the lack of communication, the lack of affection shown towards one another. You prepared yourself because you wanted him to fulfil his dream, even if it meant putting a strain on your relationship. 

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Mads Mikkelsen on Surviving the Polar Wilderness in ‘Arctic’ 

Danish actor Mads Mikkelsen, best known for playing villains in “Hannibal” and “Casino Royale,” has a more nuanced role in Joe Penna’s “Arctic.” In the survival thriller, written by Penna and Ryan Morrison, and being sold in Cannes by XYZ Films, Mikkelsen plays a man stranded in the polar wastes after a tragic accident. Mikkelsen spoke to Variety about the movie, which is produced by Armory Films and Union Editorial.

How would you describe your character in “Arctic”?
He is you and me, he is everybody. Time has taken its toll on him being alone in the Arctic for so long. He doesn’t have a real past; you don’t get know much about him – does he have a family and so forth. We wanted him to be anyone who was trapped in this terrible situation.

What attracted you to the role?
I’ve read a few things like this before and they always fall into the trap of flashbacks, going down memory lane and a little of romance — for me that’s always disturbing for a story that is quite beautiful and radical in itself; we don’t need to add more emotions to that. Every time I turned a page I thought ‘Oh, please don’t let this happen,’ and it didn’t. It just felt as if [the writers] were in tune with the character while they were writing it, and [not just writing] what the audience wanted.

What part does the landscape play in the film?
It is the main character in many ways. It’s the thing that is unchangeable. I have no impact on the landscape, but it has enormous impact on me. I am a tiny person in the midst of the universe.

Is the landscape a hostile environment or is your character in tune with it?
Both. When we meet him, he’s been there for a while and it is kind of friendly, but he is sort of under siege; you could say he [feels] comfortably numb – he has come to terms with where he is and why he is there, and he is waiting it out. In some ways the film asks: “You can survive but does that mean you are alive?” When a second person enters the film the whole idea of being alive becomes very present.

Was it a difficult shoot?
This was by far the most difficult shoot I’ve ever done, which is saying a lot because I’ve done a lot of crazy stuff in my life. We had the nature, the wind, the snow, the cold; we had long hours of shooting and I was in every scene. It was brutal, not just physically but emotionally too — I was always on the edge emotionally. It was a very draining shoot. (x)

Your Move

The nine times Simon and Baz prank each other and the one time they don’t

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10

March 30

Baz

I could have magicked the bleach out of my hair that same morning.  I could have left the room looking like nothing had happened instead of enduring constant stares all day.  Now that it’s been twenty-four hours, it would be child’s play to spell the bleach away.

           Except I don’t.

           Because Snow can’t stop staring at it.

           And some things are worth the embarrassment.

           Besides, I’m about to pay him back in full.

           I strike early, immediately after breakfast. Snow and his ducklings stand in the hall outside our first class.  Bunce sees me first as I stalk towards them.  “Morning, Malfoy,” she calls to me, “isn’t the Slytherin common room the other way?”

           They’re all looking at me, Snow, Bunce and Wellbelove. Good.  Let them watch.

           I whip my wand from my pocket as I reach them and cast before anyone can react.

           “Not a word.”

           Snow opens his mouth to say something… and his voice freezes before it can get out.

           He clutches his throat and his eyes widen, and then the storm breaks.

           “WHAT THE HELL PITCH!”  Bunce actually manages to slam me against a wall with one mighty shove, and her wand is already at my neck.

           “Get off me, Bunce.”

           “Basilton Grimm-Pitch, you give him back his voice right now or I swear.”

           “Relax, Bunce,” I hiss down at her, barely able to see her when she’s this close.  “It’s only temporary.  He’ll be back to babbling by tomorrow morning.”  It’s an unfair thing to say, because Snow never babbles.  Sometimes he has difficulty even articulating his spells.

           “And what about in the meantime?” she snarls at me. “How’s he supposed to defend himself against whatever horrors you have in store for him if he can’t do magic?”

           “What if I told you I don’t have any horrors in store for him?”

           “Still,” Wellbelove pipes up, “stealing a mage’s voice? That’s cold, Basilton.”  She says it like she’s discussing the weather or the homework or what she’d like to eat tonight.

           “Not to mention totally illegal,” Bunce chimes in, and I don’t know if she’s correct on that or not, but I’m not about to fact-check her, especially not with her right in my face.

           “He’ll still be able to retaliate,” I say with a shrug.  “He certainly didn’t need magic to pour bleach in my shampoo.”

           “Why haven’t you fixed that yet, by the way?” Wellbelove asks.

           I look Snow directly in the eye.  “The perks,” I smirk, and to my delight his face goes red.  Merlin, this is fun.

“Your move,” I tell him before turning on my heel.

***

           I don’t know what kind of charm Bunce has placed on Snow, but through some miracle he manages to get through all of our classes without being called on.  It’s a little bit unfair that he has someone interfering, but I decide not to make a big deal of it. After all, Wellbelove was right. The voice is the most important weapon to a mage, and now that I’ve taken his, he’s no better than a Normal. At least for the day, anyway.  And though the added humiliation of not being able to speak when spoken to would have been amusing for me to watch, I figure I’ve ruined his day enough already.

           Besides, there’s a storm on its way.  If everything goes according to plan.

           Football practice goes longer than usual, until the sky is almost dark, and I can see Snow starting to flag by the time it’s over. It seems like he’s been trying to compensate for his lack of a voice by playing harder, and while he was admittedly almost unstoppable on the field, the extra work has clearly taken its toll. He’s still in the showers when I gather my things and head back to the room.

           It’s another fifteen minutes before he clomps to the top of the stairs.  He’s back in his regular clothes and his hair is extra curly from the shower, and before the door has fully fallen closed he flops onto his bed face-first and just lays there, breathing hard.  I shake my head at him from my bed before returning to my tablet.

           Eventually I see him kick off his shoes out of the corner of my eye.  He hauls himself up slowly like he’s carrying a sack of bricks on his back and throws the window open, leaning out of it and into the cold night air, sucking it in like he could get drunk on it.

           When he abandons the window to take his nightclothes into the bathroom, I decide I’ve gone long enough without being an arse.

           I get up and shut the window, then sit back down on my bed.

           Snow looks at it a long time when he comes back out, no doubt trying to remember whether he closed it or not.  He opens it.

           I wait until he’s sat on his bed again to walk over and shut it.  It hasn’t even been open a full ten seconds.

           Snow stares at me with a dismayed expression as I return to my bed.  He holds my gaze when he opens it again.  This time I spell it shut from my bed just to rub it in.

           He stands in exasperation and starts wildly gesturing from me to the window and back again, his mouth opening and closing silently like he’s forgotten there’s no voice coming out.

           “What is it, Snow?  Use your words.”

           I regret it the second it’s out.  His hands fall to his sides and his mouth closes slowly. He looks so heartbroken and I hate myself.  I hate myself.

           So much, in fact, that I get up and leave, making my way down to the catacombs to feed and yell at the walls.

           When I come back much later, Snow is sound asleep.

           I take a long look at him, how his eyelids settle into place and make him appear so real.  Like if I touched his skin right now it would feel different somehow, more physical.

           I open the window before climbing into bed.

I work at my schools dining hall. I just transferred to this university thats out of state this semester. So its about to be april, and with no reliable transportation i havent been able to go home to my mom in 3 months and it has really taken a toll on me. Our spring break was at the beginning of march. However, since i started working here the manager has continously told me that the dining hall will be open and that everyone will be working, so i said okay. Told my mom i cant come home cause i have to work. Come spring break, I walk into work and was told “oh we dont need you, go home for the day because its really slow here, call back in the middle of the week, we’ll probably need you then.” So i did, by that time spring break is half over, they proceeded to tell me that i wouldnt work until school is open again smh. So fast forward at the end of the march, i booked a car to go home for a day,not even the whole weekend, just all of friday, then i come back Saturday afternoon. My schedule for the past 2 months has been mon-fri. I NEVER work on weekends. The day before i left i noticed that i had to come in on saturday. The policy is that if you cant make it to work your supposed to call in at least 2 hours before the place opens (because thats when the managers get there) to let people know. So on Saturday i called well over 2 hours before countless times, but no one picked up. I left 2 messages, then contined to call, still no one picked up. Come monday, my manager calls me into her office saying that im getting a write up because of “no call, no show” i was like huh?!?! I told her i called but no one picked up. She askes me what time dis i call, i told @ 6,7,8, and 9am (the place opens at 10) she says she didn’t arrive until 9:30. she says im getting written up because i didnt directly speak to someone, leaving a message doesnt count. How is that my fault that you didn’t want to pick up the phone or wasnt on time for work.

Hey y'all! It’s been a while since I’ve made a personal post, but I really want to apologize for not replying to messages as much as I used to or being as active on here as I was before.

I’m going through some really tough times now–I know this might sound super edgy or something, but I haven’t been doing very well mental health-wise. For those who aren’t familiar with my Sad and Tragic Backstory™, I come from a very abusive household and my time living there has taken its toll on me through things like PTSD and bipolar disorder. It takes a lot of energy for me to get out of bed, let alone interact with others, but I am trying my very best to get back on my feet again!

I also wanted to thank everyone for all your support for Puu; the story means a lot to me, and I’m glad that it’s bringing many people happiness. I never expected it to be received so well, so it’s a pleasant surprise every week when I see people’s tags, comments, and messages about how they enjoy Puu. All your support keeps me going, not only art-wise, but also in life! You all make things a little easier for me and put a smile on my face the times I need it the most.

Thank you for sticking with me! I hope you all can continue to enjoy my art and that I can keep on creating the things I love.

Wishing you all well! xoxoxo

Kamelot: Sentence Starters

“Would you stay with me if you knew that I was lying?”
“Sometimes I feel that I could rule the world.”
“The truth is lost and maybe never to be found.”
“I’ll heed your testimony.”
“One more. Just one more.”
“She/he sang a little shadow song.”
“We were always alone.”
“All I really ever wanted is to die in the arms of someone.”
“Call me a liar, a king, or a fool.”
“One day I know we’ll meet again.”
“Hear my promise of blistering light.”
“My dear, I promise, death comes to all.”
“I don’t feel the cold.”
“Will I know you then at all?”
“ There is new hope reborn in every tragedy.”
“Swallow your pride.”
“Let me sell you a dream of prosperity.”
“I need your voice to fill the void.”
“Who fears the ticking of the clock?”
“We build a bridge between heaven and hell.”
“Always know that you are not alone.
“I don’t really want to be a child of desolation anymore.”
“My inner world is quaking.”
“We’re standing on the edge.”
“Now close your eyes, and don’t be afraid.”
“I’ll take you to where the lovers go to sleep.”
“Give me something real, that I can truly feel.”
“My pain is my companion.”
“I know it wasn’t meant to heal, the cut is way too deep.”
“Give the world to me.”
“Tell me what you see.”
“Would you walk away or turn the other cheek?”
“I shine when the sun is down an carry this heavy crown.”
“I wont compromise.” 
“I’m the master of the war inside me.”
“My demons are haunting me, eating me alive.”
“Are we nothing but leaves in the wind?”
“Tell me, what’s on your mind?”
“When I’m weak in my faith will you still believe in me?”
“Here’s to the darkness to come for us all.”
“I expect no songs of praise when I am dead.”
“With all our strength we stand aligned.” 
“Every move you make creates your destiny.”
“You know just who I am.”
“Don’t be so distant.”
“Now tell me all about your pain, down to the detail.”
“Merely the sound of your voice made me believe.”
“Will you know what it is when you’ve found it?”
“My heart will still beat and I’ll never give up.”
“Heaven is a heartbeat away.”
“I am the thorn in your side.”
“The sun has taken its toll.”
“I saw your shadow disappear outside my door today.”
“How I could I be condemned for the things that I’ve done If my intentions were good?”
“You cut the silence life a knife.”
“Born in the hunters season.”
“This destiny falls upon you.”

I Don’t Want To Ruin You

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings: SMUT 
Summary: Reader is a virgin and Bucky is wary of his arm with her. 
A/N: This was request from the beautiful @pocketmegan
“I don’t want to ruin you” (Bucky being slightly nervous about being the readers first cause she’s a virgin and its still soon after his winter soldier days. Like while he’s hiding out in Romania.)” I’m sorry it was late , I hope you like it lovely! - 
There’s one Russian phrase :моя любовь = My love
Word count : 1,751 (oops)

The first time you told him you whispered it. Your head hung low, ashamed of telling him. “I’m a virgin” your voice was soft and cautious, unsure of how he’d react. “Doll, look at me” Bucky ordered gently. When you didn’t move he tipped your chin up carefully with his finger.

“I don’t care if you’re a virgin, you tell me when you’re ready, I’ve got all the time in the world” Bucky said softly, his eyes trained on yours and you never felt more loved.

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“Miss you…”

Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins (WWE)

Not sure how I should describe this one… I’ve been having a low lately, like some depression/anxiety shit that has affected like… everything. I’ve just felt… lost. Where I’m at generally… my art/style… ambrollins… Feels like I haven’t been doing art for quite some time because something just seems/feels off. I don’t know what it is, but it’s been a huge obstacle anyway. Guess I could ramble more about it, but I won’t bore you with it.

I got to doodling this digitally last week after a couple of weeks of just feeling low or at “best” unstable. I guess it somewhere reflects me, but at the same time it reflects them… and how bad it feels that WWE actively keeps them apart. Being an ambrollins shipper sure has taken its tolls on me… and WWE itself sure isn’t helping…
And maybe it’s a reaction to the re-injury.

They are at their best together… why can’t they be together…? I want to believe they miss each other too…

2

Lets Draw Sherlock - Meal Times!

Post case left over take away meal time. This particular case was rather draining, a nine that was supposed to be a four, and it’s taken its toll on the boys.

I also firmly believe Sherlock has had that take away box bowl thing figured out since he’d first gotten take away. Imagine John seeing him do it for the first time and he’s all starry eyed and saying, “Jeeze, why did I never think of that?!” And Sherlock’s all, “Because you’re an idiot, John.” And then John gives him the nastiest stare to which both men erupt into a fit of giggles.

Quick sketchy submission for this month’s challenge. Real life has me a bit busy at the moment but I couldn’t miss a challenge!

Perfect (Jughead X Reader Imagine)

REQUEST: A request if I may. My idea is its before Jughead tells the reader that he’s ace, so maybe he feels like he’s obligated to have sex with her because it’s that point in the relationship and he knows that she wants to. As everything is getting heated she notices that somethings wrong and he explains to her and she’s completely understanding and the best girlfriend because she cares about him.
WORD COUNT: 2270 (sorry)
WARNINGS: Swear words, slightly sexual times, bad writing of said sexy times.
A/N: So, I really hope I got everything right. I didn’t know much about the Ace community so I had to do some research because I wanted to make how Jughead feels right.


You had been dating your boyfriend, Jughead Jones, for 6 months now and you were ready. You were ready to take the next step in your relationship, problem was Jughead had never shown a desire to have sex before, sure you guys had had some intense make out sessions but it had never progressed past that and words can’t describe how badly you wanted it to.
…..
“(Y/N)!” A voice called from across the hallway, your head turned to the sound of your name and you saw Veronica standing there, waving you over to her. You smiled and made your way past the crowded halls to get to her. “Hey V, what’s up?” You ask once you reached her. Veronica grinned and shoved you lightly “What’s up is that you’re planning to lose you V card to Jughead tonight.” She says. Your eyes widen and you hurriedly tried to shush her, looking around to see if anyone had heard her. “V, what the hell? I told you that in confidence not so you could yell it so the entire school could hear you.” You express to her. Veronica just laughed it off telling you that no one heard her anyway. “If Jughead didn’t love you before he certainly will now I mean…you’re surprising the guy with sex on his birthday, he is going to lose it.” She says. You grin and push your hair away from your face. “You nervous?” Veronica asks. You think about it for a moment before answering “A little but not because it’s sex with Jughead, because it is sex with Jughead.” You say, putting emphasis on the different words. Veronica nods along with what you’re saying as you make your way through the school halls, out the doors and to the carpark. Veronica gets into her car and you get into the passenger seat. She had promised to drive you home that day so you could prepare your surprise for Jughead.

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anonymous asked:

I just wanna give a shoutout to my awesome Star of a manager, and really my company as a whole. We're a darker retail store (that for the last time does NOT sell weed accessories or sex toys), and I've been just generally run down lately, and it's starting to take a toll. My manager, who has been dealing with a ton of her own Life Stuff (and being well taken care of by the company), has been awesome about letting me take it easy. Just wanted to say that I appreciate it and her and my DM for it.

KENZIE’S SKETCH COMMISSIONS !

So here’s the deal, I have been up to my eyes in shit this past month and its kind of taken a toll on my mental health, and a lot of it has to do with financial difficulty that I’m probably going to be faced with in the coming weeks.It’s also why I’ve not really been active recently since everything has just collapsed on me.

So for as long as I can pump ‘em out, I’ll be opening sketch commissions like the above picture shows, and the prices for sketches will be $15. The only rules I have are;

  • No NSFW
  • Nothing too complex (like pose or anatomy-wise)
  • Don’t rush me I’m a sensitive bean
  • I’ll most likely only be doing half body drawings. Nothing full body.
  • No waiting list/reserve list because I don’t roll like that.

I would also prefer if you paid first before I got started on the commission because I kind of need that motivation to draw things. Mostly because I hate having to take money from people for free.

Just DM me if you would be interested in a sketch from a cranky scarecrow lady.  

Hello, I’ve done this times before and always hate and loathe it; but I am trying again because I do need help, and this time I guess I must be more vulnerable and give up my privacy for a moment. I will not say where I live in the United States because I can’t let those that know me get into my private affairs. My story is that I am from the South. Currently I live with my mother and sister, I’m working part-time at a pet store and I go full time as a college student. My mother is emotionally and verbally abusive, so my day to day consists of being called worthless or a burden. Most of my family is the same, drug addicted and alcoholics. I do not have a wide range of friends so I can not seek shelter else where. I do not make enough to move out on my own, and the reason I have stayed so long in this place is so I can take care of my sister and protect her. But, she is about to be a senior and as much as it hurts she knows I have to let her go in that regard; and begin to focus on my own well being.
In these past few years my depression and anxiety has gotten progressively worse, getting to points of suicidal thoughts; and I am on medication, but have not the means to have consistent counseling. For me there is a light in all this, the plan to move to Utah with my partner. I am not out to my family and can’t run the risk of doing so. Having to hide and dodge and conceal has taken its toll on me in all aspects. It has been slowly rotting me away inside, and I fear my health is at a point that I don’t know if I can make it much longer. I have not a community to call my own, or people that I can really reach out to; so those factors make things all the more difficult. In these last few years I began posting poetry to this blog, and have even tried to make a living off of it. Which may be the futility of it all, but I am trying to make it with these writing
What I am asking is not for pity, I don’t want to be seen as someone who is trying to get a sad story. My life is miserable in a very real sense, and to list my day to day life would be encumbering for me; and I do not wish to paint myself as this victim. The act of writing this at this moment does honestly make me ill, it makes me feel sick in the depths of my stomach and intestines. But, my options are very limited; and I must swallow my pride and try to block it out. What I ask is if you can, try to consider buying my book, because with enough purchases and reviews I have a shot of maybe getting somewhere with the writing.
But if you don’t feel like buying the book, then just sharing this post will help me immensely; it can give me a chance, and that’s all I’ve ever asked for. Is just a fucking chance to be happier and pull myself out of this, to be with my partner and marry them and spend our lives together. That’s all I want, that’s all I care about.
If you’d like to help with just a few dollars, that would be most appreciated. I don’t really have a set financial goal, at least 700 dollars so I can begin to plan to move my things out to Utah to my fiance. I have a paypal at hcooley40@yahoo.com
If you took the time to read this, thank you really, and to the others that just glance over this; I don’t blame you. People have to ultimately focus on themselves and I’m just a stranger. And a lot will see me as an e-beggar from this, and I guess that comes with the price of asking for help in this type of forum. But, thank you truly. My sister thanks you, my fiance thanks you, and I thank you.
Please take care

Sometimes it’s odd how strongly I identify with John Mitchell as a character, since you know, Mitchell: *is angry brooding homicidal vampire* and I: *…well…not a vampire anyway* obvi we are nothing alike

But then I thought about it and wait….wait….

~Really loves a handful of people like I’d die for you kids but everyone else is fucking annoying
~Gets super dramatic about things and broods into the distance
~Really good resting bitch face

Guys I investigated with science and we are basically the same person and here’s why

~Friends R lyfe but only like 5 of them

~Frequently has food in mouth

~Resents authority, is contrary dick

~Slumps against couch and is dramatic (no rly I SIT LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME)

~Excellent “judging you” face

~Drinks coffee while resenting humans

~Wears neutral colors/black all the time because that’s how the real hardcore kids do it

~Sometimes comes off as too intense

~But CUDDLES WITH FRIENDS 4 LYFE

~I totally have gloves like this and wear them all the time I definitely had them before I watched the show is2g it’s true

~Frequently stony-faced while other people are talking

~Don’t interrupt me when I’m reading oh my god

~Sits on floor at odd times/places

~Resents people who are taller than I am

~Gets Dramatic, Broods, Glares at People

~Also will do funny dances when happy

~Resents washing dishes

~I have no context for this, he’s just pretty. I also am pretty, but not that pretty

~Gets really into the thing I am watching, like more than the people around me

~This is my face @ work half the time [the half when I have to talk to ppl]

~Really cute when in a good mood

~Crosses arms and stares intently as casual resting position in public

~Sighs wearily into mug but Says Nothing. My Pain Is Only My Own and a Long Life has Taken its Toll

~Doesn’t appreciate ur dumb sass

~This face



Anyway I think this is quite conclusive friends

Concluded..

The finalization of a love once had can be paralyzing but in my case it was over years ago.. allowing myself to be dragged back to this love over and over has taken its toll on me.. heartache so crushingly painful I couldn’t breathe at times.. but today it came to an end and I was able to breathe just fine.. no hurt.. no hard feelings.. no regret.. my life can now move on and let go completely with no care to ever speak to that person ever again. I will refuse to continue being an option when bored or when I am missed.. I have a smile on my face and I know that I’m better off in the end.. Goodbye old flame and hello to the wonder of new love 💖💖

Paradise

A/N: Day three in Milan and traveling has taken its toll on me, I’m knackered 😓 but enjoying it! I managed to tick off something on my bucket list 😅 Here’s chapter three! (And the last you’ll see of Indy for a little while!) thank you all again for the likes/re-blogs/lovely comments! It means so much 😁

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Chapter 3
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Greg had to restrain himself from jumping with joy hearing you say that to Indy. He was walking passed at the time when Indy asked if that was the best kiss he was going to get and watched as you placed your fingers to his lips. You didn’t kiss Indy even though you had countless of opportunities to, Greg knew he might have a chance if he found the courage.

“She’s all yours” Greg was dragged back into reality when Indy’s voice echoed around him.

“What?” He managed to speak out and watched as the rugged explorer put on his wide brimmed stable fedora hat.

Indy let out a small chuckle and shook his head “Y/N, she’s all yours. I’ve noticed the way you look at her, she doesn’t bite…” Indy took a breath and lowered his voice “Unless you want her to”.

Greg stood on the spot, blinking away the confusion as Indy let out a laugh.

“Your laugh is obnoxiously loud,” you peered your head from around the door and Indy’s mouth snapped shut “Oh hello Greg! How’s things?”

“Go-good! Great!” He nervously yelped out and pushed the glasses on the end of his nose further up with his index finger “I should be off” he sent you a small smile and hurried to his next class with reddening cheeks.

You followed him with your eyes before turning around to Indy who had a cocky ‘I knew it’ smirk on his face. “What?” You asked narrowing your eyes.

“Nothing!” He held his hands up in defence “Nothing at all,” he leaned in and pressed another kiss to your cheek “Take care, Y/N”.

You waved him off and watched as he left the university building, wondering if you’d ever see him again. You pursed your lips and turned on your heel, heading back into the classroom before your classes started.

After class you began organising the expedition and before you knew it the five of you were boarding a plane to South America.

“How long is the flight?” Molly asked as you stepped onto the plane.

“Fifteen glorious hours” you sent her a small smile “Best to try and get some sleep, traveling will mess up your body clock and South America is behind us time wise so that will make your sleeping patterns go haywire”.

The doctor nodded and settled herself down. She sat beside an unknown woman, John and Sherlock sat together while you sat beside Greg. The two men where sitting in front of you while Molly sat behind.

“What’s that?” You heard the voice next to you ask as you pulled out a journal stuffed with expedition notes in it.

“My bible,” you looked at it with a smile “Survival notes, useful contacts, maps, a list of some poisonous things and safe things. This,” you held the book up to Greg’s face “will save us when I can’t.”

Greg smiled “I think that you’ll be more useful than that book. I doubt we’ll even need it!”

You bashfully smiled at your fellow professor and thanked him for his kind words. He always was a kind and caring person, Greg would often pop his head around the door at least three times a day to ask of you needed anything or just to see how you were doing. You always looked forward to it, it was the highlight of your day.

“Can- Can I read it?” He asked pointing to your book and you blinked yourself out of your thoughts. You nodded with a smile and handed it to him, grazing his hand with your fingertips. You watched him as he began reading as the plane took off, not moving his eyes for a split second as the wheels of the plane lifted from the ground. He immersed himself in your writing and scribbles and little doodles of plants and animals.

You smiled to yourself watching him study each word, taking in every single letter of your detailed analysis and helpful information. “Is this you?” Greg asked taking out a photograph of you as a little girl, pigtails in your hair and digging for 'treasure’ in the garden. That treasure was coins your mother had planted for you, she made you fall in love with uncovering and finding things.

“Yeah! I must have been about six or seven at the time” you smiled and the corners of Greg’s lips tugged upwards as he looked at the photo.

“You were really cute” he glanced up to you and then back to the photo.

“And I’m not now?” You playfully questioned and Greg’s mouth gaped a little.

He held his hands up in defence “No! I mean yes? Uh no I meant-”

You cut him off with a giggle as you pressed the back of your head to the seat “I’m just messing with you, Lestrade”. He let out a sigh of relief and nervously chuckled.

He watched you turn your head to look out of the window “South America is a beautiful place,” you told him as you watched the clouds pass underneath you “There’s thousands of animals and plants living there, most of them unknown…there could be things there that will cure diseases we don’t have a cure for yet…” You trailed off with a small sigh.

“Why haven’t we found them yet?” Greg asked and you turned your head back to face him, you noticed the book was shut over on the pull out table in front of him.

“People are too busy fighting each other, people are also greedy and selfish. There are bigger problems in this world that we should be facing. We shouldn’t be fighting each other. What good will come of that?” Greg mulled over your words just as the air stewardess came with tea and coffee.

After gulping down the lukewarm liquid your eyelids grew heavier and you fell asleep watching the clouds.

You felt a light tapping on your arm and woke up with a tired groan “We’ll be landing in half an hour” Greg told you and you tiredly smiled.

“Thanks for waking me up,” you groggily replied, Greg handed you a cup of water “Thanks” you took a sip and handed it back. Upon landing in the airport you collected your backpack and bag. You knew there was no point hauling around a big suitcase and you told the others.

You scanned your eyes across the airport and couldn’t help but smile when you saw an extending arm waving to you. You motioned for the others to follow you and you introduced them to the young Brazilian man “This is Pedro, he’s my contact here in Brazil” you smiled and the others greeted him with a grin “He doesn’t speak very good English but he’ll get us to the border of the jungle”.

“He won’t be accompanying us?” Sherlock asked.

You shook your head “No, the entrance is as far as he’ll go.” Pedro led you out to his car and you tossed your bags into the trunk of the pickup “Oh give me a minute I forgot to drop in these documents!” You rushed back to inside the airport and handed over the paperwork to customs officials before turning around and crashing into someone.

“Oh sorry!” You politely smiled.

“That’s quite alright,” the black haired man nodded “I wasn’t paying attention myself!” He lightly laughed “I’m James” he stuck his hand out for you to shake as you walked forward.

“Y/N, that’s a charming accent you have where are you-” You turned around and the man was gone “From?” You slowly uttered out the end of your sentence. You blinked and shook your head, returning to the pickup that was sitting in the middle of the beating heat of the sun. It was sweltering already and it wasn’t even eleven in the morning.

You climbed into the boot with Sherlock, John, Molly and Greg, surrounded by your bags as you made your way to the rainforest.

You fished through your backpack for a bottle of water but pulled out a note instead. You brow scrunched a little and you folded it open, it read; 'You don’t need it to be like me, you’re already amazing enough on your own. Nevertheless, I think you’d look good in it kid….well I think you’d look good in only it if you know what I mean. Take care-Jones.’ You playfully rolled your eyes and pulled out the thing the note was attached to.

A hat identical to Indy’s.

You let out a snort of laughter and placed it on your head before safely securing your bullwhip to the belt loop of your trousers. You watched the city turn into trees and you soon began to prepare yourself for the jungle.

You asked Pedro a question in Portuguese while the four others watched you communicate in awe. You climbed over Greg and opened up a hidden compartment in the trunk taking out a few revolvers, ammunition and knives.

“Wh-why do we need guns?” John nervously asked as you placed bullets into revolvers.

You handed a gun to each person “Because I was almost killed last time, I’m not taking any risks. Chances are we won’t be the only ones wanting to see 'The Death Gift’. If you want to see it,” you pointed to Sherlock “Someone else will too. Not to mention there are unimaginable dangers in the forest”.

You finally reached the outskirts of the jungle and climbed out of the pickup truck. You thanked Pedro and discreetly handed him a few notes of cash before he left the five of you.

A rumble of thunder made you all look up and you smirked “Looks like we’ve made it just in time.” You looked back down to the four faces with gaping mouths “Now you guys are going to find out why it’s called a rainforest.”

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