Easy company for begginers
  • Dick Winters:the leader, THE dad, probably secretly second coming of Jesus. Once his squad member was blind and literally got his sigh back when Winters touched him
  • Ron Speirs:will kill you just by looking at you. has a small amount of anger issues. actually cares deeply but slaughter everyone who will try to pin this on him. turns into a marshmallow when lip is around
  • "Buck" Campton:also a dad but slightly lower than Winters. needs a ton of hugs. his butt is blessed
  • Harry Welsh:another dad, the one that your friends really like. wont shut up about his wife. is smol and adorable
  • Carwood Lipton:THE MOM. can be very dangerous if you threaten his children. his nuts are okay and they thank you for caring
  • can tame Speirs.
  • Donald Malakrey:needs three blankets, hot coco and a lot of hugs. did not deserve anything that happened to him. his smile can cure cancer
  • Charles Grant:may be a just a three puppies disguised as a human
  • Bill Guarnere:loves his boys more than wants to admit. gives himself a nickname so that people wont do it behind his back. is a president of babe's and toye's fan club.
  • John Martin:is done with everyone 99% of the time. smol and angry.
  • Darrel "Shiffty" Powers:bae. everyone loves him more than they probably love themselves.
  • "Bull" Randleman:can probably lift a tank. cares about new comers. the only one that doesnt make Martin roll his eyes. would probably insist on wearing a flower crown
  • Joe Toye:IS TOO GOOD FOR THIS WORLD. can judge the crap out of you just by staring at you. is a bit of an asshole. gets easily annoyed and usually only lets luz to do that
  • Warren "Skip" Muck:definitely did not die in a war, just took vacation and is probably sipping margaritas somewhere in the pacific.
  • George Luz:ray of sunshine. will make impressions to make you feel better. or to ruin idiotic captain's orders. can be friends with everyone
  • Frank Perconte:is definitely better than you. if he would be a president, would probably order people to carry him on their backs
  • Doc Roe:an angry bunny. will ignore your rank if you will screw up with someone’s health. forgets things
  • Donald Hoobler:usually looks like a kid in disneyland. do not give him any guns
  • Joe Liebgott:probably thinks he is a queen. he is. also has slight anger problems. cares deeply.
  • "Babe" Heffron:do not call him by his name. probably provides flower crowns to Bull. If you mess with him, Roe and Bill will make a puppet out of you
  • Alex Pankala:does not really exist without Muck and Malarkey. They are probably ot3 of all the company. is also sipping margaritas with Muck in Pacific. NOT DEAD
  • David Webster:makes you say " really? you and sharks? really?". is in never-ending beauty contest with Liebgott
  • Lewis Nixon:should not be part of the company but will literally follow Winters into hell. provides information to the boys and if something fails, provides alcohol.
which easy company member should YOU fight?

Richard Winters

who wins: Winters

two days before d-day 1st lt. raymond schmitz challenged winters to a wrestling match and dick told him to go away and schmitz wouldn’t and dick got so annoyed that he gave in, but little did schmtiz know that dick was a wrestler in college and he threw schmitz down too hard and cracked two of the guy’s vertebrae

don’t fight winters

Harry Welsh

who wins: Welsh

harry got busted down to private for fighting more times than i can remember; it does not matter if you could pick him up and put him on your shoulder (looking at you, buck), he’s scrappy and will mess you up

Lewis Nixon

who wins: you

i don’t think you could actually win, considering you most likely didn’t go the through sobel-hell training that nix did, it’s just that i doubt nix has the time, energy, or interest to fight you

Buck Compton

who wins: you

buck would let you win, let’s be honest (the first time; when you then demand a fair fight, he would decline because he’d never hurt one of his guys even in fun)

Ron Speirs

who wins: undetermined

everyone is always talking about how tough speirs is and i believe that, there’s not a doubt in my mind that ron speirs is one crazy son of a gun, but i’d be lying if i said i didn’t want to see someone shoot some spit balls at his neck (what happens after that is your funeral)

Carwood Lipton

who wins: Lipton

have you SEEN lip’s shoulders? probably, but to refresh your memory:

those shoulders are broad enough to carry a medium sized town on. not to mention that lip isn’t afraid to climb a tree to fight you

Bill Guarnere

who wins: Guarnere

you will probably not win this fight because bill’s a scrappy street fighter from the streets of south philly–remember that time he tried to headbutt liebgott:

but PLEASE, for the love of pete, although the odds are stacked against you, fight bill guarnere. please do it, this man may be my husband but i’ll fight him any day. this face is just asking to be punched

Joe Toye

who wins: you know the answer

“this guy with arms like pistons” “toughest guy in the unit, period” “these two strapping arms came at lowery from behind, lifted him up, spun him around, pinned him to the wall, and clamped a hand to his throat”

i think malark about summed it up, but if you ever get the urge to fight joe toye, think of this picture:

Don Malarkey

who wins: Malark

i will once again rely on a visual aid:

when it comes down to it, though, malark doesn’t want to fight you. he doesn’t want to fight anyone

Joe Liebgott

who wins: Liebgott

lieb may be the skinniest little dude in the company but what he lacks in stature, he makes up for in attitude, pent-up rage, and a sassy mouth. also he’s a machine gunner so he’s gotta be strong as hell to lug that thing around

Eugene Roe

who wins: n/a

didn’t your mother teach you better than this

David Webster

who wins: you

we’re talking about the man who literally yelled “THEY GOT ME” when he was shot in the leg. this was not the hollywood version he actually said that. fight david webster

Johnny Martin

who wins: Martin

you know that textpost that’s like “i gotta stop telling people to fight me, i’m 5′0 tall″ that’s johnny. if you upset johnny, he’ll just glare at you until you start to get really uncomfortable, and then he’ll rope you into going on a patrol which is worse than fighting him hand-to-hand

Frank Perconte

who wins: Perco

perco doesn’t actually fight you, because when you start to get really excited about a fight, he starts going off on you and chews you out until you’ve lost the motivation to fight him

Skip Muck

who wins: Skip

skip was an expert mortar man so i wouldn’t take him on, personally. but literally every single person was in friend love with skip and his sideways banana smile, you could spend your whole life trying to come up with reasons to fight him and not think of any

George Luz

who wins: you

the trick to fighting luz is strategy. if you’re intent on taking him down, you need to do it at the opportune moment, such as when it took like half the company to shove him into the plane because of that 180000 pound radio. alternatively you can just smack him in the mouth

Babe Heffron

who wins: Babe

babe fought the whole war as a machine gunner with severe hand problems, not odds i’d want to challenge tbh. also, the only person allowed to fight babe is bill

Smokey Gordon

who wins: Smokey

i would never ever fight smokey. ever. this is why:

Shifty Powers

who wins: Shifty

you COULD fight shifty, but i mean, do you really want to? is there anything in you that can justify fighting shifty

Floyd Talbert

who wins: Tab

winters said somewhere that if he had to take one soldier into a fight with him, he’d take tab. i’m going to trust winters on this one. plus, if you piss tab off, he’ll steal your car and conduct “experiments” on it

Chuck Grant

who wins: Grant

grant falls into the revered category that skip and shifty also reside in, which is, don’t fight grant, he never hurt you, and he deserved so much better than what he got. there are no reasons in the world to fight chuck grant

Bull Randleman

who wins: Bull

we know what bull can do, let’s not test him

IN SHORT: don’t attempt to fight easy company, or joe toye will grab you by the throat before you can even get in a fighting stance