That’s Not Fair [Sirius Black – Marauders Era]
♥ PROMPT ♥
[Requested] When James and Sirius pull pranks, it’s usually at the expense of others. Y/N L/N just so happens to get caught in the crossfire of one of their latest gags.
♥ A/N ♥
I love this idea, not going to lie. I hope I did it justice! Oh, and I also went ahead and made it a Sirius x Reader because I couldn’t help myself. Hope that was alright with you, darling! And thank you so much; you’re too sweet! As a side note, I’m sorry for being so inactive. I’ve had a really rough time lately, and I don’t have anyone to talk to so that makes it twice as hard. I hope you all can understand, but I promise to get better at updating! In the meantime, enjoy xx :)
♥ WORD COUNT ♥
19. “I’d rather kiss Fluffy than do this.”
JAMES AND SIRIUS HAD DONE IT AGAIN. Merlin knew that they usually condemned lowly Slytherins to their gags and hexes, or took it to a whole other level of sheer idiocy by pranking people in the Great Hall and Gryffindor common-room. There was even the occasional prank in the Slytherin common-room, but today, James and Sirius had decided the proper setting would be the potions lab.
Slughorn was up at the front, yammering on and on about the side-effects of taking Draught of the Living Death, when it happened. You were minding your own business, writing down notes and pondering the proper brewing technique to use with your cauldron that day, while simultaneously adding ingredients and stirring, when you felt a tickling sensation in your lower abdomen. You couldn’t help the burst of laughter that escaped you, and you clutched at your stomach in an attempt to contain yourself. It didn’t work.
Your partner—a Slytherin girl with a pug-nose and permanent scowl—gave you a nasty look, but you still laughed. You laughed, and laughed, and laughed—and the sensation felt like it wasn’t ending anytime soon. Was it meant to? Everything on your body was twisting and turning, and it was like a feather was tickling you at every area you felt the slightest bit of sensitivity at! Thus, who could not help but to laugh?
Before you could stop it, you were keeling forward and knocking over your cauldron. The potion spilled across your table and onto your partner’s robes, leading to her shrieking and flailing about. Apparently, Slughorn forgot to mention that the potion burned when making contact with human flesh.
Professor Slughorn abruptly stopped talking, and his eyes widened in shock when he caught glimpse of you laughing yourself to an early grave and your partner screaming and crying at the pain. He gasped. Then, he caught glimpse of Sirius and James shaking and cackling at their booth, one holding a wand while another was crying tears of laughter and slapping the table. There was no thought necessary to see what had just occurred, and the poor Parkinson girl deserved some sort of retribution.
“Y/N L/N! Sirius Black! James Potter!”
James’s wand was suddenly put back in his pocket and you stopped feeling so ticklish. Your peals of laughter were quickly ended, and you looked like a deer in headlights as you glanced around at the scene. Bloody hell.
Sirius smiled innocently at Professor Slughorn. “Professor!” he greeted, giving the jolly man a hearty salute.
Slughorn furrowed his brow, looking a bit perplexed by the situation. James and Sirius obviously had a hand in this, of course; why else were they laughing and fooling around with their wands? Then there was Parkinson, who was a definite victim, covered in burn marks from carpels to elbow. You were a bright student, but Slughorn had noticed you glancing at Sirius from time-to-time and giggling along with the others whenever the two mischievous Gryffindors played some prank or another. Sirius must have gotten you to mess with the poor Slytherin and cover her in burns and boils!
“Fifty points from Gryffindor! And detention, all three of you,” Slughorn said firmly. At the front of the room, Snape bore a pleased look on his face while Lily’s lips were pursed and her eyes were narrowed. “Tonight at 8 o’clock sharp; I expect you in this room five minutes earlier than that. You’ll be cleaning supplies, trophies, and cauldrons—”
“That is so unfair!” you burst out, unable to believe the shite you were hearing. You glared at Slughorn with all your might. “I didn’t do a single thing!”
Slughorn ignored you and turned to that Parkinson bitch, giving her a soft smile. “Mr. Avery, please escort Ms. Parkinson to the Hospital Wing.”
Avery smiled darkly at you and the two Marauders, then beamed at Slughorn. “Certainly, Professor,” he said, and did as told. Teacher’s pet, you thought bitterly. You sneered at Parkinson before Avery had helped her from her seat, not giving a damn that Slughorn seen the entire thing. You were already pissed at Slughorn, Sirius, James, and Parkinson.
And you already had detention with three of the four. Whooptie-fucking-doo.
To ascertain Professor Slughorn’s face turning a shade of purple, you walked in fifteen minutes later than you were meant to. You were even stripped of your robes and wand, instead bearing a deadly scowl and crossed arms.
Slughorn met your gaze the moment you walked through the door. He eyed your figure from head-to-toe, face even more displeased than you anticipated. He glared at you. “So nice of you to join us, Ms. L/N,” he said. You were honestly a bit surprised to see James and Sirius already sitting at the lab tables. They were looking at you a bit apprehensively, and you appreciated the gesture of fear.
“I don’t deserve to be here,” you said simply. “I don’t even know why I bothered to show up.” You cut your heated gaze over to James and Sirius.
Professor Slughorn cleared his throat at the hostility in your voice, but decided to ignore it. “Very well, then,” he muttered. “The cabinets and cauldrons are charmed so that simple wand magic won’t work as cleaning units. That being said, you’ll need to hand-clean everything. I’ll be back in two hours, and if everything isn’t cleaned to my liking, then expect to stay here an extra hour or two. Understand?” The three of you muttered your affirmations. Slughorn looked suspicious, but held back from voicing any comments. “Alright, then.”
When the door was slammed shut behind the waddling man, you let loose the groan you’d been holding in since you first received the detention. “I’d rather kiss Fluffy than do this,” you growled. If you didn’t find Sirius Black so bloody attractive, you would have punched him in the face by now. Instead, you opted to storm over to where James was propped up against a table and kick him in the shin.
“Merlin’s sodding left nut, Y/N!” James yowled, holding the afflicted area with a pain-stricken expression painted on his face. “You kick like a bloody man!”
“Good,” you said. You glanced at Sirius—a horrible mistake on your pair—and had to instantly look away to avoid the butterflies in your stomach. Damn him! Damn his black hair, gray eyes, Adonis-like jaw, and muscular arms! Damn him to Hell! “Now, if you excuse me—” Without sparing the two another glance, you marched over to the supplies cabinet. Grabbing a wet-rag, you set about on cleaning a cauldron.
James, after some time of caressing his lower leg, made his way over. Sirius—the bloody dog—followed his partner in crime, his walk more like a swagger. It made you want to retch.
For the first twenty minutes, you ignored the boys and cleaned your chosen selection of cauldrons. They were whispering to one-another, paying more attention to their ridiculous jokes and gags than their work. If you’d had your wand, you would have used it to hex the bastards, if only to make them do as told and not leave everything up to you.
Sirius gave a loud snigger, and you turned to look at him. He had his wand out and was pointing it at a cauldron. With a quick swish-and-flick, as well as the murmur of a cleaning spell, the cauldron was spotless. James gave a gasp, and you felt yourself stiffen in surprise.
“Slughorn was trying to trick us!” Sirius said. His smirk was wide enough to tear his jaw in two.
You were impressed. “They can detect magic when it’s used on inanimate objects,” you told him. Your cheeks involuntarily heated when he turned to look at you; Merlin knew what other girls felt when his smoldering eyes met their gazes. You hoped you were better at hiding how flustered you truly felt. “Slughorn was probably trying to test us.”
“Slughorn’s not that smart,” Sirius said disbelievingly. “I’m surprised he had enough of a brain to make up some way to have us hand-clean his shite.”
You rolled your eyes and glared at him. “We wouldn’t be in this mess if the two of you didn’t hex me with a tickling charm!”
“It’s not a hex unless it hurts,” he said, voice a bit too patronizing for your liking. “It was just a charm. How was I supposed to know you were going to knock your potion onto Parkinson?”
“Ugh! You Marauders never bloody think!” You threw your hands up in exasperation. James was watching the two of you in fascination, looking like a Muggle boy at the cinema. “I could have been the one covered in boils and burn marks!”
“I’m sorry, alright? Is that what you want to hear?” Sirius asked mockingly. “But you have to admit—Parkinson’s shriek was fucking comical. Greatest gag of the century, that was!” He and James reached to one another, meeting in a high-five.
You grabbed the cauldron you were just cleaning and flung it at Sirius. You didn’t have any reason to do it, nor a grievance that made sense of your fury, but you felt it necessary to unleash your annoyance on him. You weren’t even that annoyed, honestly. Did that make you regret your actions? Not in the slightest.
Sirius briefly howled in pain, then cursed his mother’s name, father’s name, cousin’s name, and brother’s name. The cauldron had hit him right on the forehead, causing him to drop his wand and a fast-growing knot to appear in the middle of his brow. He was rubbing at the area and muttering curse after curse.
“Bloody fucking hell,” he growled and gave you the side-eye. “What was that for?!”
If you were smart, then the appropriate response would have been to lift your chin proudly and not talk at all. However, you weren’t a very smart girl—at least when it came to attractive Gryffindor boys. “For constantly looking at me like you do! Like I’m just some sodding Gryffindor girl you want to shag!”
“What if I want to do more than shag you?” Sirius shouted back. James was looking between you two with wide eyes, probably wondering if the same thing could ever occur with him and his Lily-flower. “What if I want to make all the blokes know you’re mine? Hang my arm around your shoulder and kiss you whenever I bloody well please?!”
You marched forward and poked him right in the chest. “Then why don’t you?” you snapped at him. Before you had the chance to spring on him another challenge, he was fisting your hair and meeting your lips in a passionate kiss.
James whistled in the background. “Go, Padfoot!” he said encouragingly, as if to compensate for his lack of a girlfriend. “Didn’t know you had it in you!” Well, he did—but anything to further encourage his mate for a committed relationship!
You flipped your middle-finger up at James. Smugly and with great pleasure, your arms slithered around Sirius’s neck and your lips parted wide for Sirius to gain entrance. Merlin, you never expected for an undeserving detention to result in this.
Let’s just say that Professor Slughorn was very displeased to find a certain Potter boy missing from the scene and you and Sirius making out against the supplies cabinet. The two of you received a week’s load of detentions, but it was fucking worth it.