harmful to children

I’m literally crying rn

So, my friend came to visit me and we were just chatting when he saw my tumblr so we started talking about it. The MAP and NOMAP thing came up and he said “I think you’re one of those”. I got so nervous I couldn’t look him in the eye then he was like “but nobody chooses who they are attracted to you know. pedophiles don’t choose to be pedophiles, they choose their actions towards that attraction” and OMGGGG I feel so much better. Also, we talked about how trying to prohibit people to ship fictional characters isn’t going to do any help because that’s the ONLY way these people have to fulfull their desires without doing harm to children. Otherwise we’ll just have a bunch of frustrated people. Imagine knowing you’ll have to live your life without ever fulfilling that desire because you’d never want to traumatize someone. Actual child abusers aren’t on tumblr looking at rickmorty fanart, they are preying on actual children. We are just trying to cope and feel good not hurting others.

Antis telling us to die or hide in a cave isn’t helping. MAPs will always exist so let’s try and help maybe(?)

So uhm yeah, I’m really happy I have friends who support me and know I’m not a monster irl :)

anonymous asked:

Most of my "hatred" of children boiled down to fear of them, if that makes sense? Like I still say "I don't like them" for simplicity's sake but I'm actually genuinely afraid of accidentally hurting/upsetting them or being accused of hitting them or something (which is more of my parents' paranoia with other people's kids that I internalized combined with intrusive thoughts) I legit have never hated or wanted to harm children, I just really had no other language to express it

I understand that completely

I hate it when people are so against teaching young white kids to recognize their racism. Like people will literally say shit like “oh they’re too young to be taught about racism, that’s harmful!” but like children of color are never too young to face racism from white people who were never taught to recognize their racism as children. Start teaching white kids (boys AND girls) to recognize their racism; the problem starts when they’re young.

anonymous asked:

Do you realize that being fat isn't always good? I mean if you're still healthy it's fine but once it gets to point it starts becoming a health problem. It's not good for that to happen right? Do you want people to slowly waste away and die of heart disease? They're basically killing themselves and it's not a perfect comparison but if you meet a self garner do you want them to stop?

HUZZAH! This is my first psuedo-intellectual anon hate. And my-oh-me, it’s a doozy. I love the condescending “gotchya” tone in this, as if anon is asking ground-breaking, mind-blowing questions and not the same bullshit concern-trolling that has been debunked over and over again. But I’ll indulge anon’s ignorance for the moment, if only so that I have a comprehensive response to link to other fatphobic assholes in the future. 

Put simply, my dear anon, your questions are silly, and you should feel bad about how ignorant, hateful, and fatphobic you come off in this ask.


1. Health is a complex concept that is dependent on many individualized factors. Similarly, weight is complex and depends on many factors completely out of an individual’s control, including genetics, poverty and food insecurity, and trauma history. Neither exercise nor a “healthy” diet result in long term weight loss. 

2. Weight is a really inaccurate, non-evidence based proxy for the concept of health. Hate to break it to you, but the BMI is bullshit, and overweight and obese people actually have lower mortality rates than people in the “normal” category. Yes, you read right, evidence shows that being fat can be good for your health. 

3. Heart disease has links to several risk factors, and “overweightness” by itself does not reliably predict heart disease. In fact, some evidence suggests fat people are better able to survive cardiac events than thin people. Correlation is not causation, yes, even with conditions such as type 2 diabetes mellitus, so it is incorrect to say that having a lot of adipose tissue directly causes illness of any type. Being fat is not per se unhealthy. Additionally, invisible disabilities and illnesses exist, which precludes you from knowing whether ANY given person, whether they are thin or fat, is “healthy”. 

4. Based on 1,2, and 3, it’s clear that you have no idea what someone’s health-status is simply by looking at them. You have no idea whether someone’s weight is “killing them” or causing them to “slowly waste away”, and all the evidence suggests that it’s simply inaccurate to say being fat is enough, by itself, to kill someone. 

5. Linking someone’s health to their moral goodness or worth is inherently ableist. If someone is fat and unhealthy they are still a human being worthy of love and respect. If someone is fat and disabled they are still a human being worthy of love and respect. If someone is fat and eats nothing but “junk food” and never exercises THEY ARE STILL A HUMAN BEING WORTHY OF LOVE AND RESPECT.  

6. Shaming people into the weight loss you deem to be “appropriate” does not work and actually leads to increased weight gain and a myriad of negative outcomes (more discussed in 7 and 8). For example, the “War on Obesity” has been linked to increased disordered eating in pre-pubescent children.  Harm reduction and trauma-informed, client-centered care works better than the shaming, 12-step, crash-diet, “I know more about what’s better for your health than you do” bullshit. 

7. Mental illness kills tens of thousands of people in the United States every year, and shaming someone’s body size under the guise of “health concern” has empirically proven negative outcomes on mental health

8. Fat stigma in the medical establishment and society at large arguably kills more fat people than fat does. Attempts to “correct” fatness such as repeated dieting and “lifestyle changes” have been shown to have negative health outcomes.  

9. Of all the complex health and mortality risk factors that exist, fat seems to be the only one that you care about. Why aren’t you yelling at people you see driving cars or smoking? Probably because your “health concern” for fat people is just thinly veiled fatphobia.

10. THE HEALTH STATUS OF OTHER PEOPLE IS NONE OF YOUR GODDAMN BUSINESS ANYWAY. Right to privacy in personal medical concerns is like, one of those inherent human right things that we have all these laws protecting to the point that it’s a crime to share someone’s private medical information without their consent.  

In conclusion, this fat ass is off to eat some cake, cuddle my cats, kiss my partner, and love my fat body just the way it is. 

lilith-eves-last-stand  asked:

Sorry if this comes off ignorant, I don't mean it... My son is 4 1/2 and was diagnosed two years ago. I try to do the best I can and let him be him 💕 but while he's in speech therapy (he's still moving into the idea of talking), schools in the area (private) push ABA for students with autism. But I see young adults like yourself saying ABA is NOT good. I'm more inclined to listen to someone on the spectrum than those not, but what is the issue with ABA?

First, I want to say that I am so glad that you are turning to the autistic community for help. This isn’t an ignorant question at all. There is so much conflicting information out there about ABA that it can be hard to even know where to begin. It sounds like you really want to help your son as best you can which is admirable. 

To start off, not all therapy labeled as ABA is actually ABA. I’m going to explain what the issues are with true ABA and then explain how to figure out if the therapy they are trying to push on your son is ABA or not. 

ABA stands for Applied Behavioral Analysis. It is a scientific method that involves observing the individual in order to identify “target behaviors,” i.e. behaviors that are undesirable to the parents/therapist. Next, aversives, rewards, and operant conditioning is used to eliminate these behaviors and encourage wanted behaviors. Overall, this may not sound like a bad thing, so let’s get into why this therapy is harmful. 

The groundwork of ABA therapy is the idea that autistic people are broken and in need of fixing. Our natural, non-harmful behaviors, such as stimming or lack of eye contact, are targeted as behaviors in need of fixing. The main focus of ABA is making a child “indistinguishable from peers,” i.e. to make the child seem “normal.” 

This often includes things like getting rid of stimming (often with the phrase “quiet hands”) and forcing eye contact in order to make the child less noticeably autistic. The problem with this is that stimming is a coping mechanism for autistic people. We stim to regulate our emotions/senses, cope with stress, and express ourselves. Eye contact can be uncomfortable or even painful for us and being forced to perform it can be just awful. 

Further, changing these behaviors does nothing that is truly beneficial for the child. Instead of being trained out of behaviors that are non-harmful, an autistic child should be taught ways to manage their autistic traits in a way that is useful and productive for the child. For instance, if a child is uncomfortable making eye contact, learning to look at a person’s forehead or nose is a great alternative as most people can’t tell the difference. 

Further, due to the focus on making a child indistinguishable from peers, there is often a push towards verbal speech even when atypical methods of communication like sign language or AAC would work better for the child. 

ABA therapy operates by using rewards/reinforces and punishments/aversives to train a child to perform wanted behaviors and to stop unwanted behaviors. Rewards are withheld until the wanted behavior is performed and aversives are used when an unwanted behavior is performed. Often, foods, such as gummy bears, candy, or other tasty treats, are used as rewards as well as praise or affection, access to a comfort object, break time, stickers or stamps that can be traded for privileges/rewards, or access to a special interest. Additionally, some therapists make use of a clicker, a device that makes a loud click sound originally used for training animals, to indicate that a wanted behavior has been performed and that a reward is coming. 

For aversives, the removal of a comfort object, withholding of snacks, removal of reward items, or prevention of engagement in a special interest are often used. Some therapists also use “taste aversives” like pickle juice, vinegar, hot sauce, or other bad tasting edibles, as well as “tactile aversives” which would be making the child touch something that sets off tactile defensiveness or distress. Withholding praise or affection is also used as an aversive. 

In DTT (Discrete Trial Training), a form of ABA that is considered to be kinder than other versions of ABA, the therapist will not look at, engage with, or respond to the autistic child until the desired behavior is performed. Similar methods are employed when unwanted behaviors are displayed. 

As a treatment, ABA is centered around compliance training, in other words, making a child compliant to the desires of the adults in their lives. Rather than focusing on how to help a child live the best autistic life they can, the focus is put on making the child seem “normal” no matter what the cost to the child. This serves only to make parents more comfortable and does little to help the autistic child as they progress through life. 

Using aversives on a child ranges from bad to cruel depending on the aversive used. Withholding rewards from the child, particularly when those rewards are food or other necessities, creates insecurity in the child. Further, by training a child in this way, the child becomes more vulnerable to victimization. When you are told by all the adults in your life that you must ignore your own pain and discomfort for the sake of adults, how is a child to know when they are being abused? How is a child to know that the adult touching them in that way is wrong when they are forced into hugs which are painful for them? 

You may have noticed that what was described here sounds an awful lot like dog training, and that’s because it is. ABA trains a child in the same way you would train an animal which is dehumanizing. Autistic children are not animals whose behavior should be crafted to suit those around them. Autistic children are unique individuals who need support and care. 

Finally, ABA therapy is often a full time job for the autistic child. Often, 40 hours a week or more of therapy is recommended for optimal results. It is ridiculous to put a child through such a strenuous routine. 

So what are you to do instead? Obviously you want to help your child live the best life possible which is wonderful. There are plenty of therapies that can be very helpful to autistic children. Speech therapy, which you’re already doing, can be great for children who are struggling with verbal speech, though methods of AAC should be provided until the child is able to communicate verbally (and even then, AAC should still be available for times when the child goes nonverbal/semiverbal). 

Occupational therapy to help with sensory integration or motor difficulties or other areas in which the child is struggling. There are also play-based therapies like floor time which can be very beneficial to autistic children. No matter which therapies you utilize to help your child there are a few things to keep in mind. 

First, therapy should be supplemental according to the child’s need rather than the central aspect of their life. If the therapy schedule would be exhausting for an adult, it’s not appropriate for the child. Next, does this therapy help the child live the best autistic life they can or does it focus on making the child appear to be “normal”? Normalization is for the benefit of parents while good therapy focuses on helping the child with things that the child finds problematic such as learning to cope with sensory issues or learning better communication (whether that’s verbal communication or AAC). 

So how do you figure out is what is being presented to you is true ABA or something else masquerading as ABA? There are some questions you can ask to help sort this out. First, though, we need to go over why there are therapies that aren’t ABA calling themselves ABA. In the US, most insurance plans will ONLY cover ABA for autistic children. As such, many therapists who perform other therapies have resorted to labeling themselves ABA in order to be covered by insurance. This allows them to work with children that otherwise wouldn’t be able to access these therapies. As such, what is being pushed for your child may not be true ABA. 

Here are some questions to ask:

  • What is the goal of the therapy? As we’ve discussed, ABA focuses on making the child “indistinguishable from peers” or normalization. If you hear that phrase, turn away and don’t look back. Even if the therapy isn’t ABA, the goal of making a child appear “normal” is not a useful goal for the child and can be detrimental. 
  • Does the therapy make use of rewards and aversives? We’ve discussed why aversives and rewards can be damaging to a child. A good therapy for your child will use other means to discourage harmful behavior. 
  • Does the therapy emphasize compliance? Compliance makes for a “well-behaved” child but does not lead to a healthy, independent adult (which I’m sure is what you’re hoping for in your child’s future). Therapies should focus on helping a child manage any harmful traits they have without forcing them to be compliant to an adults wishes. Just like all children, autistic children will not always be obedient or follow adults’ wishes. This is how it is supposed to be. Children need the space to make their own mistakes and learn and grow. Compliance teaches a child to shutdown their own needs and desires to fit the desires of another. 
  • Does this therapy discourage non-harmful behaviors? Autistic children will sometimes engage in behaviors that are harmful to themselves or others. These behaviors definitely need to be addressed and worked on. For instance, a child’s stims may physically hurt another person such as grabbing onto other people to stim. This behavior is not ok and a parent/therapist should work with the child to redirect the behavior. However, ABA often focuses on stopping behaviors that are not harmful. For instance, most stimming does not hurt anyone. It may be atypical behavior, but it generally does not hurt the child or anyone else. If a child is being bullied for their stims, that should be addressed with the school to change the harmful behavior of the other students rather than stopping the child from engaging in behaviors that are useful for self-regulation and expression. A good therapy will focus only on discouraging harmful behaviors. 
  • Are you allowed to observe the therapy as you please? In non-harmful therapies, you will generally be allowed to observe the therapy whenever you wish as they have nothing to hide. If a therapy will not allow you to observe what is being done, then it may be harmful to your child. However, even some therapies that are harmful may allow observation, so, when you do observe, make sure to really pay attention to how they treat your child. 

If the therapy being presented to you passes all of these questions, then it is not true ABA and could potentially be helpful for your child. As we’ve discussed, there are many therapies that can be beneficial to autistic children. Some useful goals of therapy could include:

  • Changing harmful behaviors- if a child is causing harm to themselves or others, the behavior needs to be addressed and the child should be provided with alternatives to help redirect the behavior. For instance, if a child is playing with their own poop, the child needs to be taught that this is unsanitary and provided with playdoh or other sensory tools to use to redirect the need for sensory input. Similarly, if the child hits others while melting down, one alternative may be providing the child with a pillow or stuffed animal to hit instead. 
  • Communication- While many therapies focus on speech, the true goal should be improved communication. This may include speech as a goal if that is within the child’s abilities, but it should also include forms of AAC to be used for communication either until the child is able to learn verbal speech or instead of verbal speech if speech is too difficult for the child. AAC can include letter boards, picture boards, text to speech apps, among others. Sign language can also be useful in facilitating communication. 
  • Managing Sensory Input- Many autistic children are hyposensitive and/or hypersensitive to sensory input. As such, it is important to teach the child ways to manage their sensory sensitivities. This may include managing their sensory diet by setting aside time for sensory play, use of sensory defenders like headphones/ear defenders/ear plugs, sunglasses, or other methods of regulating sensory input, and stimming as a method of regulating sensory input. 
  • Anything that causes the child distress- If a child is struggling in an area and it causes them distress, that is a good thing to work on in therapy. For instance, if the child is having frequent meltdowns, one of the goals of therapy should be to figure out why the child is having so many meltdowns and find ways to accommodate the child to prevent meltdowns. Similarly, if the child struggles with socializing with other children and is upset by this, social skills classes may be beneficial. If something is upsetting for the child, then it is likely a good goal for therapy. However, if the child is not bothered by something, therapy likely isn’t necessary (unless it is causing harm to the child or others).

So this got super long. I hope I’ve addressed everything you needed covered. If you have anymore questions, you are welcome to send me more asks or check out @autism-asks to get more info about autism. 

Finally, I’m going to leave you with some links that cover ABA from other perspectives:

I hope this helps you and your son! 

-Sabrina

For those that think that this is about the independence of Catalonia:

It. Is. Not.

Saying that the referendum was illegal doesn’t justify using violence. People wanted to exercise their right to vote and the prime minister sent instead against them thousands of riot policemen with the permission of beating up defenceless, peaceful citizens.

Let’s not forget they harmed elderly people and children.

So no, this isn’t only about Catalonia, this is about democracy and human rights.

Pricolici aesthetic

Romanian folklore creatures series - III

Pricolici, similar to strigoi (troubled spirits of the dead rising from the grave), are undead souls that have risen from the grave to harm living people. While a strigoi possesses anthropomorphic qualities similar to the ones it had before death, a pricolici always resembles a wolf or a dog. Malicious, violent men are often said to become pricolici after death, in order to continue harming other humans. Sometimes “sin children” (from incest) become pricolici after they die.

anonymous asked:

My mental health has been taking a steady dive the past few months, and there are honestly times I would just like to yell at everything in my head to be quiet. Except it doesn't work. Anyways, Anabasis is really, really cathartic for me and I was wondering if you could post anything from it? I don't care what, since literally everything you write for this 'verse does the trick.

Hey anon, I’m really sorry for the week-long wait, and I hope you’ve been coping okay. Writing Anabasis is pretty cathartic for me, so I’m glad it’s good for other people, too.

I really wanted to finish up this section so I could post it for you - hope you like it! This snippet follows immediately after the last snippet I posted. (So I think this marks the first time I’ve posted two bits that actually connect!) It also makes reference to this snippet.

In which Anakin explains his new tattoo, Padmé learns she was baby Vader’s secret hero, and Orn Free Taa should probably start running.

Warnings for discussion of slavery, references to Anakin’s transmitter explosion, and very oblique references to conditioning and abuse of children.

All of that said, this is actually a pretty happy snippet.

They talked in circles for another two hours, and by the time Padmé saw her guests out, very little had changed. Taa and his cronies remained unmoved, and still planned to bring their bill to a vote, in spite of their demonstrated inability to defend it with anything other than easily debunked talking points. She was still less confident than she’d like to be that they would fail. But at least they now seemed more sullen than smug. And they’d kept glancing nervously at Anakin and then away.

He’d joined their meeting ostensibly as an unofficial representative of the Outer Rim Territories, but he’d referred more often to Imperial policies than to Tatooine. As political tactics went, it was both transparent and stunningly effective.

And Padmé would be lying if she said she hadn’t enjoyed watching it play out.

So she was more than a little surprised when, after the last of her guests had gone, Anakin turned to her with a set jaw and shuttered eyes and snapped, “I’m not going to apologize.”

Keep reading

i know this is an unpopular opinion but: jack and maddie are not abusive parents.

they’re not going to be winning parents of the year awards by any means, but they are not abusive. they are involved in both of their children’s lives but know not to push into their privacy. they trust their children to make good decisions and encourage them to pursue their interests even if jack and maddie aren’t interested. they don’t talk down to their kids when they’re arguing and speak to them at an age appropriate level. they aren’t emotionally or verbally abusive - even when danny is being disciplined, they are reasonable. they’re pushy when they’re concerned for his safety, but you can’t blame them when you see how dangerous amity park is.
it’s clear that they made sure that both jazz and danny knew the functions and operations of the lab, the ops center, and the home security system and that both of them knew the safety rules of both. they trusted their children not to abuse the equipment and to follow safety procedures (which danny did not do on multiple occasions).

do they have a violent and harsh approach to ghosts? yes, but ghosts that come through the portal are mostly violent and powerful. they are technically fighting a war - an invasion of poltergeists and mostly alone too. they are working to defend their family and city from a mistake they made. also, have you noticed that a lot of the weapons that they make only weaken and contain ghosts? that they haven’t actually made a single weapon designed to completely destroy a ghost? yes for the most part they have no empathy for ghosts, but they’re not out to destroy them. i do think that they put on a façade that makes them look harsher on ghosts than they really are - if jack hated and distrusted ghosts so much, he wouldn’t have released danny in million dollar ghost.

and yes, both jack and maddie get sucked into their projects, but they make sure their kids know where they are and will stop what they’re doing if jazz or danny need them. the only times they were shown as being completely neglectful is during the christmas flashbacks when they were so wrapped up in their arguments that they forgot their children (but also remember those were told by tucker/ghostwriter who are BOTH dramatic). they have both shown themselves to be more than willing to spend time with their kids and they were excited for it.

the fact that they don’t push into danny’s life when he is obviously wanting privacy isn’t abusive or completely neglectful. they make themselves available to him, spend time with him, and will do things in his best interest. they trust and respect their son and they keep an eye on him. the reason why they know so little about his problems at school are because danny doesn’t reach out to them. they have shown themselves open and willing to protect him, but danny internalizes his problems and refuses to talk to them. jack and maddie do try to have conversations with him and when he gets uncomfortable, they let him leave.

danny also knows all of this and he knows that they’ll love him no matter what (he even said so in bitter reunions and confirmed this in reality trip). there are a lot of reasons why he doesn’t tell his parents about his ghost powers (doesn’t want them worrying, doesn’t want they thinking they half killed him, doesn’t want them to accidentally reveal his identity, etc) and i think it’s the combination of those fears along with the worry that they might be scared of him/hostile towards him that stops danny from talking to them. even if you know something to be true (like your parents loving you unconditionally), there is always room for doubt and danny definitely suffers from that.

so no, i don’t think the fentons are abusive parents and i don’t think it’s right to try and label them as such.

Tbh, y'all are weak when it comes to animal lover fahc ryan. Like, it’s cute that he saves a stray puppy at the end of a heist, but there could be so much more.

Like, he kills a man for abusing his dog, taking the dog to a local shelter & helps rehabilitate the dog.

He could blow up a car for running over a bird, than takes the bird to a nearby vet & pays the medical cost.

He breaks into a place that is rumored for being a puppy mill, and than he has to call up the lads to help him take all the dogs to the shelter.

The Vagabond could hear about a factory farm a county outside Los Santos, and each night, he goes out and saves an animal for months. He takes them to different vets & shelters each night before driving many more hours to go to an animal sanctuary and letting them take the animal and give them a good home.

Ryan Haywood could be wanted by the FBI for Eco-Terrorism, simply because he goes into factory farms and saves an animal each and every night, because he believes the innocent shouldn’t be exploited for money.

Like, come on, animal lover doesn’t just mean “oh no, a stray kitten that I just randomly ran into”, animal lover should mean “Yeah, technically I’m the most dangerous man because the FBI hates me for saving animals from a life of suffering.”

anonymous asked:

So in Anabasis, I know you've mentioned Maul a few times (one of the reasons Anakin doesn't like Obi Wan is because he killed Maul before Anakin got the chance), but we don't really know that much about his relationship with Anakin. Maul would have been around since the beginning of Anakin's sith training, right? How did those two feel about eachother?

They hated each other.

Which was, of course, by design. Palpatine knew that one of the best ways to keep his pawns in line was to play them against each other.

Maul was actually responsible for most of Vader’s early training. Palpatine doesn’t strike me as the kind of person who can be bothered with teaching the basics. In canon, all of his apprentices came to him pre-trained by someone else. In this universe, Vader was a blank slate, but Palpatine already had Maul, who was fully trained in every form of combat. (And honestly probably a better duelist than Palpatine himself. It’s my longstanding headcanon that Palpatine actually isn’t that great with a lightsaber. He got pretty far in ROTS on the strength of his surprise reveal, but in general his modus operandi is that he’s the brains. He keeps his apprentices around to be the brawn.)

And making Maul teach Vader served several other purposes, as well. It meant that Maul was training his own replacement and he knew it, which served to exponentially increase Maul’s rage and his desperation to keep his position (and his life). That in turn made him even more brutal in his training methods than he already would have been, which made Vader hate Maul all the more - and gave him added incentive to become “strong” enough to defeat his teacher/tormentor. Palpatine could then set himself up as above all of the power squabbles of his apprentices: the all-knowing, unassailable Master, looking down from on high.

Neither Maul nor Vader once entertained the idea of turning on Palpatine. That wasn’t even a possibility. Their enemy was each other.

(This is part of the reason that Padme’s election as queen, in spite of Palpatine’s plans, was such a revelation for Vader. He’d been conditioned for years to view his Master’s power as absolute and unquestionable. He was the Master. His word was as good as reality. Until, suddenly, this unimportant girl outmaneuvered him, and all sorts of things Vader had never dared to even think about became newly and shockingly possible.)

Maul was always under orders not to permanently damage Vader. And no matter how he hated the slave brat, he wouldn’t disobey his Master. But he could hurt the boy in ways that wouldn’t damage his functionality. In pursuit of teaching him a lesson, of course. And Palpatine wouldn’t protect Vader from such lessons. If the boy was strong enough in the Dark Side, he’d be able to prevent them.

(Several of Vader’s scars, including the long lightsaber proximity burn that cuts diagonally from his right shoulder to his left hip, are actually scars he received from Maul, not from Jedi as Padme assumes.)

Baby Vader had endless revenge fantasies about what he would do to Maul once he was strong enough. And Palpatine, of course, always encouraged them. Not just because they steeped the boy in the Dark Side, but also (and maybe more importantly) because all of Vader’s rage and pain and fear were channeled in that way towards Maul, rather than towards Palpatine himself. So the idea of Maul became another way for Palpatine to keep control over Vader.

Then the Battle of Naboo happened (another thing that was never supposed to happen at all, but there was Queen Amidala again, throwing a wrench in Palpatine’s plans), and Kenobi killed Maul, and quite suddenly Vader was the Sith apprentice.

He, of course, believed he was ready and had been for years, but privately Palpatine certainly didn’t consider having a child apprentice to be very ideal. And there was the added problem that the chief object of Vader’s incredible hatred wasn’t there any more, and Palpatine needed to find some way of directing that rage. So he aimed Vader at the Jedi, and that was effective, though perhaps not so effective as Palpatine believed.

(And, of course, he never picked up on his apprentice’s youthful but never fully forgotten hero worship of Queen Amidala, the Girl Who Beat Him. And that turned out to be the greatest danger of all.)

House Rules

So for those of you that are spirit keepers/companions, or are spirit workers of any frequency, you may know a bit about house rules. Now keep in mind, you don’t need to have house rules. Some don’t find that they need them, some prefer not to have them. I choose to have a set of house rules because I find that for me, it helps bring a little peace and harmony to my house, and that if anything did go wrong, I have something to refer to. Anyone in my house, be it astral being, spirit or entity, from white arts to dark arts to black arts, is expected to follow these rules while they are part of my household/in my house.

These are my house rules. Feel free to use them if you like, modify them, add/subtract as you see fit. I have had a lot of success with these so far, and no incidents. Depending on who is in your family/keep/court, you may need to add rules, or subtract them. But these are what work for me & my family. What is in bold is my actual rule, and then I will expand upon the rule if I see fit.

1. Never harm or show disrespect to myself, my significant other, any other member of my family, friends or welcome household guests. This is obvious… I don’t want any of my spirit family hurting each other, nor do I want them hurting any human or animal that is welcome in my house.

2. Never harm any children or pets.

3. Never show yourself to anyone besides myself in your true form, unless your true form is something that would not scare them. (Example: If it is a child, appear as something child friendly.) I have a few not so pleasant looking family members, or some beings that in their true form are pretty terrifying. I wouldn’t want them showing themselves to a child or an adult.

4. Sexual contact is only welcome with me and will not be permitted with anyone else. Basically just don’t go touching my boyfriend or anyone else, they don’t appreciate it. 

5. No physical manifestations at work in front of anyone but myself. Patients and coworkers are not to know about you. Some of you may not need this, but I work with the public and don’t need a spirit manifestation scaring patients away.

6. Protect yourself at all times. If something comes up and I can do something about it, I will help. 

7. Do not hamper with communication. This covers and includes communication between yourselves, or with me. If I am working specifically with one or with one group, I don’t need anyone else butting in and hampering that communication. Wait until I am done.

8. Do your part for the highest good of the household, including all spirits, entities, astral beings & other. All living people, spirits, entities, astral beings & other shall work at living together peacefully. Bullying wont be tolerated, if you have an issue, contact me.

9. We work as a team, with me being the team leader. If you have suggestions, tell me. If you are unsure to my wishes, ask me or look within. If they have doubts about something, my family is always welcome to “look within” for my wishes, if I am for some reason unavailable to ask. 

10. No twisting my words.

11. No lying. Do not pretend to be something/someone you are not. Do not make anything up to make someone else look bad.

12. Disarm malicious magic that is sent my way by someone else or that is around by circumstance.

13. Keep watch over property & always be ready to act against any pending issue.

14. Help identify any possible conflicts. Help judge the character of people, spirits, entities, astral beings & other around us. This has actually been a useful rule in several situations. Its really two rules condensed into one, as well, but its how I have it written in my notebook.

 Thats it! They are fairly long, but also fairly basic, and cover the essentials. Most rules are pretty obvious, but I would rather state the obvious then regret not stating the obvious later on. Again, this is just what I use for my house rules (its nice to have a digital copy on here as well) - you can use them if you like, add/remove rules as needed. & if you don’t do spirit work, or have spirits in your regular household, you don’t even need to have this.

Enjoy!

when bigots use “children need a mother and a father” as an argument against same sex marriage, even though a) you dont need to be married to start a family, b) children aren’t inherently a part of marriage, c) there are a lot of children who don’t have a mother and a father due to death, divorce etc. and d) the biggest harm that children of lgbt+ families face is exposure to homophobia from outside of their family, i can’t help but wonder if they actually think it’s genuinely a solid argument or if they’re just repeating a phrase theyve heard because they think it sounds meaningful if you don’t actually think about it 

“i wish there were more non-bar lgbt spaces”

me, nodding: ok, good, alcoholism is a big problem in our community, plus not everyone drinks + under 21s can have a hard time finding places to meet

“…bc the lgbt community is so ~sexual~/gay bars are Dirty/it’s gross :(/it’s acephobic/they’re harmful to children”

me, recoiling: bad fucking content,

childhood behaviors - 4th House (Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto)

Jupiter in the 4th House indicates that the child could have been very wise and spiritual from a young age, perhaps these children had developed certain ideologies growing up. It’s possible that they also were described as being “over-the-top” or maybe these individuals were excessive in everything that they did - excessively talkative, excessively energetic, excessively indulgent in terms of the things that they enjoy. May have attracted lots of good fortune too.

Saturn in the 4th House indicates that the child could have been extremely disciplined and was taught to behave properly and politely. They responded well to authority and respected the rules, and were fond of structures and firm daily routines. These children matured quickly and understood what’s acceptable and what isn’t. They also probably were well-mannered in public. In addition, they may have been good teachers, possibly teaching their siblings how to do homework or they knew how to assemble complex stuff.

Uranus in the 4th House indicates that the child could have felt very different from the rest, and may have been an outcast in the family due to their eccentric personalities. Could have developed strange/unique interests that are uncommon for most children. It’s likely that they were told that they’re too weird. These children probably rebelled against their parents or against people in general, either by doing their own thing and criticizing social norms or by acting out to make a statement. This child is also technology savvy and thought outside-the-box.

Neptune in the 4th House indicates that the child could have felt lost and confused during their upbringing, and believing that they almost didn’t really belong in their home or to their parents. They most likely had frequent dreams and loved to daydream, and could have been developed a fantastical imagination, being gifted in writing mystical stories or painting abstract things. This child had an outstanding intuition and was gifted with otherworldly empathy, always feeling that they could relate to others no matter the circumstance.

Pluto in the 4th House indicates that the child could have been viewed as the dark one in the family, perhaps preferring to be on their own and kept to themselves. May have been quiet and brooding, constantly dissecting those around them. These children were faced to confront the malevolence of their home or even the evilness of the world at a young age, experiencing things that are maybe a bit too harmful for children. Thus, they aimed to protect themselves. Could have been paranoid or suspicious of others’ intentions.

Part 1: the inner planets

This should go without saying. Anyone who wants to sexually harm children and animals should be considered evil. An animal can’t consent!! A child doesn’t know what you’re doing to them! I don’t care if you built a ‘relationship’ with them, you’re evil because you violated their trust and used them for your own gain.

anonymous asked:

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a post about the parallels between the fire nation royal family and the SWT chief's family. Obviously I have some thoughts but I couldn't really formulate them well. I think it would be interesting to consider the similarities between the two families but also the contrasts

I understand completely why it’s difficult to articulate, because while all four family members have counterparts in the opposite nation, there are as many contrasts as there are comparisons, and subversions of what we might think is a parallel, but isn’t.

Ozai and Hakoda. Ozai rules over his family with an iron fist. He demands respect and longs for total control over everything and everyone in sight. His lust for power consumes him and leaves his family twisted and shattered.

Hakoda is the diametric opposite. Although Water Tribe culture could have led Hakoda to assert authority over his family as the head of his house, he didn’t; instead, he listens to and is proud of Sokka’s ideas, and lets Katara yell at him (quite disrespectfully, I might add) in order to release her pent-up emotions. While Ozai rules through fear, Hakoda commands his warriors through respect. Where Ozai is manipulative, Hakoda is cunning with inventions. And while his family quite easily could have been shattered by Kya’s death, Hakoda’s love for his children and their love for each other kept them united.

Ursa and Kya. These two are the most similar, and occupy virtually the same place in the story and their respective families. They are strong and determined mothers who sacrifice themselves to save their children from harm. After they’re gone, the children who look up to them the most have a difficult time dealing with their loss, and their families suffer greatly. It is important to note that this applies to the A:TLA TV show only, and not the comics. You can’t make the claim that Ursa “sacrificed” for Zuko if she spent all the intervening years in deliberate obliviousness to the suffering around her, living the life she’s always wanted to with the man of her dreams!

 Pardon me while I take a moment to let off some steam.

Anyway.

Azula and Sokka.

“But wait a minute, Araeph! Zuko is the older brother, so shouldn’t Zuko and Sokka be paralleled?”

Zuko and Sokka do have similar experiences throughout the show; however, they are not true parallels. Azula is the coldly logical (and yet creatively crafty) one of her family. Sokka is the strategist of the GAang, and the one who can see clearly past Azula’s strategic manipulation (if not her emotional one).  Sokka and Azula are also the ones with the most responsibility thrust on their shoulders, as Sokka feels pressure to be the “man of the house”, especially with his father away at war. Meanwhile, Azula faces so much stress for being the only child Ozai considers competent and the heir apparent to the Fire Nation that she develops an insidious strain of perfectionism that eventually tilts her world upside down. However, while Azula’s response to her father’s abuse is to regiment her firebending so that not even a hair gets out of place, Sokka absorbs his father’s ideas and praise like a sponge and gets the chance to stretch his creativity on pursuits other than warfare. As the privileged firstborn son, Sokka could have refused to listen to Katara and Suki or used his position in the tribe to try to gain more power, but he didn’t. He made a conscious choice to become a better person throughout the series, while Azula, despite her exceptional skills, never grew in such a way.

Zuko and Katara. Katara is the person who wields her emotions like a weapon, determined not to let anything stand in her way. Zuko is the same: he goes where his emotions tell him to, regardless of whether it’s the wisest course or whether it affects his personal safety. Both of them are very practical when the need arises but can be blown off course by an event that evokes their childhood trauma or their current state of cultural oppression (Katara) or abuse (Zuko). They are capable of enormous acts of kindness, but they also take their anger out on safe targets—not people with less power, but people who will see them at their worst and accept it (Sokka, Hakoda, Iroh, each other). Katara is the mighty bender of the SWT family, but her fighting style mirrors Zuko’s much more than it does Azula’s. Zuko’s bending is characterized by drive and determination, and one look at Katara trying to freeze the firebenders in Episode 2 alongside Zuko’s duel with Zhao in Episode 3 shows just how similar these two are. But since both of them began their journeys on opposite sides of the war, their challenges are different: Katara has to fight for the rights that she deserves, while Zuko needs to learn that he doesn’t have the right to be spoiled and have everyone bow to him just because of his lineage. Still, they’re alike in one more important way: they successfully learn to see the “enemy” as an ally, even a friend, and despite their childhood experiences or conditioning, they are both willing to embrace an element of change.