hardest parts of life

when you hate your legs 
remember that they carried you through the hardest parts of your life. they get you out of bed every day and take you to what you love.

when you hate your stomach
remember that it helped you gain strength. it holds the memories of deep laughter and great meals. it is full of warmth and joy.

when you hate your arms
remember that they are strong, which makes you strong. but they are also soft and can be used to cuddle and hold the ones you love.

How to Read Energy and What to Expect

As many of you know, one service I offer on this blog are energy readings. I have gotten a lot of inquiries on how I do these readings, so I would like to inform you on my methods as well give you tips on how to do them yourself. Please note that I am not an expert nor do I have the final say on how to do energy readings properly, this is just my experience. 

Understanding Energy
The way I understand energy is as the force that inhabits everything at one point or another. Everything has an energy signature, down to the smallest grain of sand. However, the energy of living things is a bit different. There have been many names given to this energy but it is most often known as one’s life force. The hardest part of an energy reading is picking up on one’s particular energy among the trillions of energy sources swirling around at any given moment, but I will tell you how I do this.

How to Read Someone’s Energy

My method for reading energy is going to be different from everyone else’s. Your method for reading energy will be different from everyone else’s. Everyone has their own techniques for reading energy, but here are a few of mine.

  1. Sit in a comfortable location with at least part of you pressed firmly against the ground. 
  2. If you are reading for someone irl, have them sit near you. Physical contact often helps if both of you are comfortable with that. 
  3. If you are reading for someone not physically present, it can help to have a piece of them “sit” in front of you. I ask for names and blog urls when I do my readings so that I have an energy signature to focus on but you really can use anything or nothing at all, whatever helps you get a lock on the other person’s energy. 
  4. Sit in front of the person or blog and close your eyes. A bit of meditation before you try to tap into their energy is a good idea.
  5. Feel the energy of the earth under you and feel out this individual’s energy as it appears, a piece of the earth just like you.
  6. Grab onto this energy. Snatch it from the earth just briefly. Images, smells, tastes, sounds, colors, and feelings should come to you as you feel their energy. Keep a mental note of what you experience and write it down once you return.
  7. What you have experienced while feeling someone’s energy is their energy reading. It may be a bit of a jumbled mess, but that’s okay. Everyone’s energy is different but there may also be some overlap, which is also okay.

You can give someone their energy reading in many forms. I give mine as a paragraph with everything I saw, yours may be only a line or two. Everyone experiences different things when reading energy and having shorter readings isn’t a bad thing. You may even pick up on more or less energy from each individual. Its totally okay if some readings are long and others very short. 

So…. What if your energy reading doesn’t resonate with me, like, at all?

There could be a great number of reasons your reading went screwy. As I said before, energy can neither be created nor destroyed, it simply changes shape. This being said, it could be a number of factors.

  1. I am picking up not on your energy, but the energy of someone very close to you. If you have been in contact with them recently, pieces of your energy sometimes clings to them. 
  2. It could also be that I am reading into the energy of one of your past lives, something you won’t necessarily resonate with or remember.
  3. It could also be that the reading was accurate but maybe some part of it was hard to hear, or some repressed memory. This is not the fault of the reader, in the long run it is up to the client to interpret the reading. 
  4. It could also be external factors in my own life clouding my ability to pick up on your energy. My cat knocks over a vase in another room and not thinking I write that in as your energy because I was so lost in the moment.
  5. It could also be you’re my last in a long line of energy readings and I am exhausted and hurriedly trying to get through your reading without paying attention to detail. 
  6. It could be any number of things, all acting upon one another. Keep an open mind. 

Whatever the reason for your energy reading not being accurate, it is best to just be polite and move on. No good will come of harassing a reader, especially if they are offering a free service. 

I just did an energy reading and I’m exhausted!

Yup, that’s a real thing and totally normal. Energy readings can be draining, especially for beginners, as you expend some of your energy when you tap into the earth and go out in search of other energies. This is especially draining at first if you have not yet learned how to shield your energy when searching in the energy field and subsequently some of it may be leeched out. Here are some self care tips to help you regenerate faster.

  1. Time yourself. I like to light a stick of incense before I start my readings. Once it is completely burned out, I stop no matter what I’m doing and go drink some water and just do something I enjoy for 30 minutes or so before returning to readings. 
  2. Eat or drink something sugary or high in carbohydrates while you read to return energy lost. I like to munch on sweet cherries while I read.
  3. Learn to shield yourself from energy drain. I imagine my energy dressed in a suit of impenetrable armor before I search out someone’s energy. Your shield can come in any manor of form, find one that feels right to you and keeps the pesky energy leech out. 
  4. Take little breaks in between readings, even just a minute or two to catch your breath. 
  5. Use crystals to return your energy. I like to take some moon-charged amethyst and hold it in my palm during breaks, feeling its energy flow into me. 
  6. Practice self care. Shower, change your clothes, put on some lotion or makeup… Anything like that will help replenish energy.
  7. Take a nap! I have a bad habit of doing energy readings as soon as I wake up and then I’m dead for the rest of the day. Napping helps immensely. 
  8. Know your limits. You probably won’t be able to do 20 energy readings your first day. Pacing is so important.
  9. If you are doing energy readings online, be prepared to use the block button. Some people are going to be rude, but that is their problem not yours.
  10. Have fun! If energy readings become stressful take a break. If someone is waiting on you for their energy reading, they will understand if it comes a little late. If not, fuck ‘em. You don’t owe anything to people who don’t care about your well being as a reader. 

There are a great many things you can do to recharge after an energy reading, but these are just a few of my favorites. Everyone is different, and respecting that is key. 

Remember actually enjoying yourself is key. Good luck with your energy readings!


send me free clothes i wanna model.

Shout out to everybody who’s trying to get their life together. Working on yourself is the hardest part of life. The rest comes after.

Clexa Week 2017 - Day 1 - Enemies to Lovers

Royalty AU

Lexa grew up with the legends about the times of war, the devastation of the plague and the Sky Kingdom, that was eternally exiled to the high mountains. Nobody knows what is true, not until she becomes the Commander, not until a princess appear on her kingdom bringing death and taking their lands.

But war isn’t the hardest part, Lexa was trained all her life for this. The hardest part is realizing she already met the girl before, it’s pretending nothing happened, it’s hiding the secret that could destroy her own kingdom.


(Nico di Angelo/Will Solace, general audiences, fluff, 841 words.)

“You’ll stay in the makeshift infirmary tomorrow?” Nico asked in a low voice.

“Actually I’ll be healing in the middle of the battle. Like the Olympian War all over again,” Will replied in the same volume. It was just Nico and him in the tent, but he didn’t want to risk waking up his friends, who were sleeping in tents beside theirs.

“That’s dangerous.” Nico noted with not a small amount of distress in his voice. His fingers grabbed Will’s shirt, which he’d just been tracing until then.

Will half-shrugged.

“I’ll heal, and you’ll fight.” He sighed, resigned. Then, he caressed Nico’s hair, a gesture that would be natural if it wasn’t for how much care he put into it, as if Nico was the most important thing he’d ever touched.

“I’d say my chances are pretty good. I mean,” Nico said, “I’ve survived every battle I’ve ever fought.” Until now, yes. “That’s gotta count for something, right?”

Will gave him a reprimanding look.

Barely survived.” He murmured, but still his voice broke. This was an old argument; one they had no means of solving or ignoring until the day Nico didn’t have to fight anymore.

Will sighed again.

“But,” he continued, “I know you. And I trust you to be… prudent.” I trust you to come back to me.

Nico studied him for a moment. And then his gaze softened, changing from a cautious, calculating look to the loving eyes of someone who believed in beautiful things.

Will, like always, wasn’t expecting it when Nico leaned in and kissed him on the mouth. Quickly, just a peck.

Then another.

The third one was more difficult because Will kept smiling. The duration or frequency of their kisses hardly mattered to him. It was the Nico-ness of it all that always made Will’s heart flutter, content.

“I promise that,” Nico said, “if I have to, I’ll come running straight to you.”

Will held Nico’s gaze for a moment, then nodded. Will wouldn’t have believed him, once. Knowing and accepting that they couldn’t fight all battles was the hardest part of a demigod’s life. But Nico was a different boy from the one who kept falling onto him, too insubstantial to stand up on his own. This Nico valued his own life and wanted to stay, wanted to come home.

Will trusted him.

“I know,” he paused, pretending to ponder about something. “But— are you sure you’ll come running straight to me? Is that even possible?”

It took Nico a few seconds to get it, but when he did, his face opened up in the most incredulous, most beautiful smile Will had ever seen (something he thought about most of Nico’s smiles, but that didn’t diminish the truth in each of those occasions).

Will unconsciously smiled back. Nico punched him lightly in the arm.

“Shut up.” He said, still grinning.

“C’mon, that was a good one!” He put on a pout, pretending to be upset, and Nico laughed, not cruelly.

“Will,” he said when he paused his laughing to breath, “none of your jokes are good.”

It didn’t matter to Will whether they were good or not. As long as the goal of making Nico smile was met, he would keep making them.

He fake-sobbed, which made Nico try not to laugh too loudly, the glimmer in his eyes visible only due to the faint moonlight that entered their tent.

“You— you don’t like my jokes? You’re so mean!” Will whined, and Nico bit his lower lip.

“Shut up,” Nico ordered with a small roll of his eyes. “Go to sleep. Tomorrow will be…” He narrowed his eyes, traces of humor mostly gone. He never finished the sentence.

“Shitty?” Will suggested, and Nico sighed, looking up at the tent ceiling.

“I was gonna go with ‘tiring’, but that works, too.”

“Mhm. Yeah.”

Nico yawned, covering his mouth with one hand while the other found Will’s. He gave it a squeeze before letting it go and turning his back to Will.

“Night, Will.”

“Good night.”

Will stared at Nico’s back for a minute before turning too, wanting to get closer to his boyfriend, but not wanting to push any limits. Wanting something to focus on that wasn’t the war ahead, but not wanting Nico (or himself) to panic at the realization that they most likely wouldn’t be this close to each other for at least a few days.

But then, minutes later, he heard and felt Nico turning and moving closer to him. A hand grabbed the fabric of his shirt, and Will pondered what to do for about two seconds before figuring Nico was as desperate as him for some contact, some tenderness.

So he turned and inched closer to the other boy, putting an arm around him and caressing his back. Nico sighed, responding to the touch by resting his head against Will’s chest, his fingers caressing Will’s ribs in irregular movements. Will gently kissed the top of his head.

It was only then that they could fall asleep.

I want all my pieces to fall back into place,
And I want all these memories to magically erase.
Everything about you that thrashes in my mind,
I hear you, I feel you, I taste you, every time.
I want it to fall to pieces, just like my fragile heart,
But I can still see everything, even in the dark.
I cannot escape you no matter how I try,
Because you’re as much a part of me as I.
—  K.N.B.
Our interview with Kellin Quinn from sleeping with sirens about the stigma of mental health and more

1. What is your names & what do you play in the band?
My name is kellin, and I open my mouth real wide and yell/sing higher then a new born baby in a band called Sleeping With Sirens.

2. • How did the band get started?
A MySpace message, a one way ticket to Orlando.. constant touring, 7 records later here we are!

3. •What has the funniest thing that has every happened to you on stage?
Mostly anytime I slip and fall on stage.. you try and make it look like you meant to do it.. but in the end you always look and feel like a dumb dumb.

4. •If you had 1 million dollars in the music industry what would you use it for?
I’d pay off my house, pay off my moms house.. and if I had any money left I’d donate somehow..

5. • If you could tour with any band or musician dead or alive who would it be with & why?
Linkin Park.. I’d always hoped to at some point.. but I would have loved to sing with Chester.

7. What do you think of the media frenzy over mental illness meaning should we talk about it more in the world

The worlds a fucked up place, we spend our entire lives consuming and buying into an American dream that doesn’t exist.. joy is not found in material possessions, We shouldn’t all be expected to look like the photoshopped celebrities that are thrown in front of our faces on a regular basis.. life is about accepting ourselves, good/bad.. and being kind to others.. project positivity and you’ll find it returned 10 fold.

8. Have you ever dealt with depression or any other mental illness & if so how did you handle it?

I deal with both every day.. it’s not something that can be fixed quickly.. not sure if medication helps or not.. but I do know that it’s a constant battle to overcome.. but you aren’t alone.. I’m here with you.

9. What would you say has been the most difficult or hardest part of your life so far?
I’d say my 30’s.. life becomes real.. you have to put on adult shoes.. you have other people relying on you… there’s a fine line between doing music for the art of it/ paying the bills.. that part makes me sad.. because music has always been my escape.. but it doesn’t feel like that as much anymore..

10. What would you tell a fan that is struggling with self harm ?
I understand the need to numb the pain.. but I feel like it’s something you would regret when you get older? It makes me sad that people physically hurt themselves because they are hurting so bad emotionally.

11. What is like when a fan comes up too you & tells them your music saved there life or get them though hard times in life?

It’s literally the reason I still do it! Music/ this band is bigger then all of us.. I’m honored to be a part of it. I’m thankful that some words I wrote mean so much to people that hear me out.

12. Does any of your songs talk about anything dealing with depression or self harm or anything along them lines.

Better off dead stands out the most to me..

13. What would you tell some ones that scared to ask for help because they don’t wanna be looked at differently.

Please ask for help, tell a friend.. don’t go it alone.. your mind is a terrible place to get locked away in.. and it can make us think terrible things.. it’s important to have someone help you off the ledge..

14. Do you think we as society should be able to have a conversation about mental health without being judge or looked at differently & do you think we should be able to talk about it in our school systems?

Absolutely!! I’m always down to talk about anything that pushes us forward in helping others.

15. Do you think the media should look at mental health in a positive light, more then just jumping to conclusions on the news?

I think that we as human beings can do amazing things if we work together.. let’s not wait for everyone to jump on the band wagon.. let’s start making a difference now.

Tattoo #3 is another band tattoo. Music has gotten me through some of the hardest parts of my life, and La Dispute is one of the bands who kept me going through every word they write. I got their logo to remind myself everyday of how strong their music has made me. “It’s not the petty imperfections that define us, but the way we hold our hearts and the way we hold our heads.”

conversations a life wizard has in a dungeon
  • fellow wizards: ty
  • life wizard: yw
  • fellow wizards: ty
  • life wizard: yw
  • fellow wizards: ty
  • life wizard: yw
  • fellow wizards: ty
  • life wizard: yw
  • fellow wizards: ty
  • life wizard: yw
  • fellow wizards: i need healing
  • fellow wizards: ty
  • life wizard: yw
  • fellow wizards: ty
  • life wizard: yw