hard on for hemingway

Adverbs aren’t evil; said isn’t dead
Please stop hitting the wall with your head

Active is grand but not always the best
Sometimes it’s passive that passes the test

Some write with style, others write plain
Let’s all agree that writing’s a pain

The ‘rules’ can be broken, twisted, or bent
All that matters is that you are content

Make your own story and write your own way
This has been a writer’s PSA

Modern AU that follows the ups and downs of a college English department:

  • Mary Shelley, the slightly morbid Brit lit professor who specializes in Gothic literature, and always has her students read the creepiest pieces
  • Edgar Allan Poe, the awkward, but lovable poetry professor who all the students either love or hate. 
  • Emily Dickinson, the other poetry professor, who no one seems to have classes with, despite the fact that she’s been at the school for years…and when are her office hours again?
  • Oscar Wilde, the Shakespeare professor, who teaches not only two lit classes focusing on Shakespeare, but also teaches a drama class. Everyone loves him.
  • Ernest Hemingway, the hard-ass creative writing professor, who rips everyone’s writing (and self esteem) to shreds.
  • Charlotte Bronte, the Brit lit professor who lives and dies by the canon and thinks YA is an affront to literature.
  • Louisa May Alcott, the American lit professor who goes off on tangents during lectures and loses her train of thought. People like her because she’s an easy grader.
  • Mary Ann Evans, the feminist American lit professor, constantly at war with Charlotte Bronte over what constitutes literature, and desperate to be taken seriously in the academic world.
  •  Fyodor Dostoevsky, the visiting professor from Russia, who teaches a specialty class on how different translations change the meaning of a work. The class is completely full.
  • Annabel Lee, the encouraging, sweet professor who teaches English 1, the composition class required for gen ed. Most of her students are freshmen.
  • H.G. Wells, the creative writing professor you want to get. He always encourages his students to be as creative and imaginative as possible, but he still manages to give them constructive criticism. His science fiction class is always full.
  • Lenore, isn’t an English professor. Lenore teaches History of Fashion, among other things. But she’s helped Oscar with costuming on a few plays, and she’s currently working with Mary Ann Evans on a specialty class that focuses on the ways that clothing plays a part in literature. She hangs out in the English department a lot, because her office is in the history department, and history professors “are, like, totally boring.”
4

“Arguably, the first being the most important, read it for us, Mr. Simms.”