Satellite | John Murphy X Reader
English isn’t my first language, so please excuse any mistakes.
A/N: I’m very obsessed with Satellite by Guster, so I decided to make a story based on it. But I, first and foremost, made it as a birthday present for @justauthoring. She is a great friend of mine, caring and wonderful and totally deserved it, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY, OLLY!
Word Count: 1978 words.
Since Murphy had been captured by grounders, he hadn’t been able to sleep well It’s not like you could sleep in peace while people torture you or when you can be killed at any second. And being back at the camp wasn’t exactly better, since there was Bellamy there, who seemed to be crazy to kill him. But there it was definitely safer. So, after helping Clarke take care of some ill people, sick of the illness he had brought to that place, he couldn’t help but get some sleep.
A while later he was awake again and saw that new sick people had been placed inside the dropship. He saw a familiar face between them, making his heart race a little. (Y/N) (Y/L/N) was there. (Y/N) “the best friend he ever had and who happened to be the girl he liked” (Y/L/N). He hadn’t seen her since he’d been banished from the camp, and he honestly thought he’d never see her again. But there she was.
(Y/N) was lying on the floor with her eyes closed, her face was covered with sweat as she kept her mouth slightly open to try to breathe better. Which didn’t seem to work, as soon the girl closed her mouth and returned to breathe through her nose. She began to cough, turning herself to the side and vomiting blood.
Clarke, who was checking someone else, picked up a wet cloth and started walking toward the girl, but was stopped by Murphy.
“I got this one.” he said, taking the cloth from her hand. She nodded and went back to the other person.
John crouched beside the girl, waiting for her to stop to throw up, and then starting to rub the cloth on her face, taking the thin line of blood down her mouth and taking some of her sweat away.
Her eyes then opened, staring at his face. She recognized him instantly, her lips parted, as if she meant to say something, but nothing came out of her mouth, which closed again after a few seconds, followed by a sigh. Her hands groped the floor until they reached Murphy’s hand, giving it a squeeze.
(Y/N) closed her eyes, leaning toward the cloth, as she felt it give her some relief as it brushed past her face. She smiled weakly as she felt herself drifting off to sleep.
Seeing her sick and weak like that made his heart sink a little, but if he had managed to get better, then she would, too. She was strong. And he had faith in her. And in fact, it didn’t take long for her to start getting better, and since that had begun to happen, she had also started helping Clarke with the sick people. But she and Murphy didn’t talk, occasionally they just sent glances at each other, just happy to have each other’s presence there. Just happy that each other was alive.
John was discreetly looking at the girl, who was cleaning one of the bloody cloths after helping one of the sick people. She took a quick glance at him, returning to concentrate on what she was doing.
He was sitting in one of the corners of the ship, since no one seemed to need his help at the moment. (Y/N) then walked over to him, kneeling beside him. “Hi.” she said, a small smile appearing on her face. “Hi.” he replied, kind of happy to see that the girl had made the first move to talk to him.
And then he noticed that the wet cloth was still in the girl’s hands, making him frown slightly. She realized that he was looking at it, and then started to direct it toward his totally screwed face. Murphy pulled away from the girl when he noticed the cloth was for him. (Y/N) rolled her eyes, trying to get closer to him, to which he kept pulling away. The girl sighed.
“Come on, John, you have to let me do this.” the girl rested on her knees. “It won’t hurt, I bet you won’t even feel it.”
The boy looked at her suspiciously for a few seconds before surrendering and coming closer to her, also resting on his legs, lifting his face slightly so that (Y/N) could clean it. He soon regretted it when he felt the cloth touch his wounded skin, feeling it burning, making John give her a glare.
“Yeah, I lied.” she said, grinning at him.
Murphy was ready to give her a cheeky comeback, but felt the cloth touching him again, making him grunt, followed by a “fuck” as he closed his eyes.
“Sorry.” she said. “It will be fast.”
He kept his eyes closed, as if that would make it hurt less. The pain stopped being so uncomfortable after a few minutes as the boy began to get used to the sensation. And then, in the midst of all the sounds of people almost dying around them, Murphy heard a familiar rhythm, then opening his eyes and realizing that it was just (Y/N) humming a song. He knew that song and to hear it being hummed by the girl caused some memories of the Ark to come to him. The two of them used to listen to this song together while they were hanging around. Their favorite song. Their song.
Murphy could not help but analyze the girl, something he often did on the Ark and even on Earth. He loved taking every detail of her face, her eyes, her nose, her sweet lips. He actually loved decorating every detail of her, her hair, her hands, her silhouette. Everything. And then think about how lovely she was. Always trying to help others and trying to see the best in people. Trying to see the best in him, even when he couldn’t see it. Maybe that was why he had fallen in love with her, but he had never risked telling her that. She was very good for someone like him, maybe she was always a little out of his reach.
John could not help but be amused when he noticed the concentration (Y/N) was putting on it, looking intently at his face as he carefully wiped the cloth over his cheek. He was somehow happy to be back at the camp. Back to her.
“I wanted to look for you.” she said after a few seconds. “But they didn’t let me out.”
“Good they didn’t.” he said, his voice sounding a little hoarse. (Y/N) glared at him, looking a bit offended. “Look at how I am. It’s dangerous out there.”
The girl glared at him for a few more seconds before nodding and wiping the little bit of bruises left on his face. “Well, I’m glad you’re back.”
“You seem to be the only one;” he murmured, noticing the icy glares some delinquents sent him.
“I missed you.” she said with a shrug, as if it were an obvious thing.
Unlike Murphy, (Y/N) had always been good at showing her feelings, he had always had a problem with that. He wanted to tell her that he had missed her too, to tell her how difficult it had been to spend those days without her. But he just nodded, saying a low "Same.”
That, however, seemed to have been enough to cheer the girl, who smiled warmly at him, taking the cloth off his face and putting it to her side. “It’s done, you’re brand-new.” she said, beginning to tell him what had happened while he was away, but John was no longer listening, since his thoughts were far away.
Murphy always had problems concentrating when he was next to (Y/N), but that smile she was giving. Oh, that smile. That smile made him forget the terrible last days he had had, and the growing anger he felt for those who had tried to hang him. And while (Y/N) was beside him, he was sure that those thoughts wouldn’t come back to him. She always brought the best of him.
Seeing her talking excitedly to him made him feel relieved. He really thought he would never see her again. In the Ark, everything was more certain, the certainty that he would see her the next day, safe and alive. But on Earth everything seemed so uncertain. (Y/N) could easily be dead the next morning, dying without knowing how important she was to him. Dying thinking that to him she was a “same”, not knowing that in fact she was an “I fucking missed you too”. (Y/N) always made sure he knew that he was important to her, even if it was just as a friend. He wanted to do the same. He needed to do the same, at that moment. He couldn’t put it off any longer, because maybe they might not have a ‘later’.
“I’m glad to be back, too.” he said, cutting off whatever she was talking about. “I missed you too.”
(Y/N)’s smile widened at the boy’s words. “I’m glad to hear that.”
Murphy looked at her smile one more time before taking a deep breath and trying to find the right words to say to her. Why feelings had to be so difficult? “You’ve always been here for me…” he began slowly, looking anywhere but her.
Well, we’re friends, it’s normal that…“ she said, being cut off again by him.
"You always believed in me, you make me want to be a better person.” he paused again, taking a quick look at the girl’s confused expression. “You kinda guide me, I… Well, you’re… Good. And that makes me want to be good too. Good enough for you. But I don’t think I’m very good at it.” he chuckled. “But you’re always there, no matter how much I’ve screwed it up.”
“I would never give up on you,” (Y/N) commented. “I’m flattered that you see me like this, but I don’t want you to change for me. I mean, you’re good in your own way and I love it.” the smile reappeared on her lips.
Oh boy, she’s so precious. That smile, how could he not be attracted to those lips? And as that thought passed in his mind, Murphy followed his instinct and leaned toward her, pressing his lips against hers, making her gasp. As he pulled away from her, he noticed her surprised face. “Oh.” she chuckled, feeling her cheeks begin to heat up.
That was the time. He just had to say the three words that defined what he felt for her. The three words he could barely remember the last time he’d used them. “I love you”.
(Y/N)’s eyes widened, even with the kiss, she didn’t expect those words to come from him. A goofy smile came to her lips. “Wow.” she just managed to say at first, unable to stop smiling. “You were always special to me.” she began and he nodded, predicting the speech ‘you’re like a brother to me’ that was to come. “But I never thought you felt that way for me.” she intertwined her hands nervously. “I’m very glad you feel like this. I love you too.” she said awkwardly. She wasn’t used to saying that.
They stared at each other for a few seconds, not knowing what to say. Murphy with a rare true smile, while (Y/N) continued with her goofy, embarrassed smile.
“So…” a voice behind them caught their attention. Clarke. “If you’re done, can I steal (Y/N) for a few more minutes?”
(Y/N) smiled sheepishly, apologizing for being distracted, although she didn’t seem to feel sorry at all. She picked up the cloth again and hesitantly kissed Murphy before returning to help Clarke, while John watched the sweet girl doing what she did best, help people. And with a smile he thought, if she saw in him someone good, then he saw it too.