NIKKI: This was the beginning of the end. I knew I was either gonna die or get sober. I knew how to die. By then I’d had many secret overdoses and seizures so I understood where the line was and I was just inches from crossing it. The dying could be easy…it was the living that I didn’t know if I could do.
BOB ROCK: I met Nikki when I produced Dr. Feelgood. He had just gotten sober for the first time. I’ve always known him as not normal but sober and straight, and in that state he’s one of my best friends. I’ve seen him slip twice. After we finished recording Dr. Feelgood, I was in a studio with Nikki and Tommy. It was a Sunday night in Hollywood, and he and Tommy decided to have a glass of wine with dinner. I was telling them, “Guys, you can’t do that,” but Nikki said, “Rockhead, one glass with dinner will be fine.” Of course after the glass came another one, then suddenly the bottle was gone and Nikki was on the phone to his dealer. I asked him, “Nikki, what are you doing?” And he said, “Why wait? I know where I’m going tonight, so why wait?” He went to the total extreme in ten minutes. Then the whole night just became pure pandemonium. Nikki and Tommy went to a club–there was probably only one club open on a Sunday night, but they found it. All the old dealers came out of the woodwork; there were girls, drugs, debauchery. We ended up back at the studio because I figured that was the best way to keep them out of jail. They ended up carving swastikas in the wall of A&M’s studio. We had to blow out the first week of recording while Nikki went home to try to mend his marriage.
The problem with street drugs is you never really know exactly how potent they are from dealer to dealer, so I OD’d on the spot. My lips turned purple: I was gone. The story I heard was that the dealer grabbed his baseball bat and tried to beat the fucking life into me. He couldn’t, so he flung me over his shoulder to dump me in the trash, because nobody wants a dead rock star lying around.
DEFINITELY LAST BUT STILL NOT LEAST Someone asked me why I was writing this book and I said, “Maybe one person will read it and it will help them.” They said, “That’s not very rock ’n’ roll, is it?” I said, “Fuck off” and smirked, because I know it’s the most rock ’n’ roll thing about me–doing what I wanna do in life. I guess Lemmy was right–I am better than that.