halluciation

anonymous asked:

I'm very sorry that you have Schizotypal Personality Disorder. But, I'm just wondering, what do the hallucinations look like? In describing them? Are they terrifying or are you just used to them?

I don’t really mind them,actually. I hear that other people have disquieting hallucinations, but for me they don’t really bother me, but I think that it’s because my mind doesn’t have a proper fear response to traditionally terrifying things to begin with. I’ve also heard that hallucinations are different depending on cultural expectations and so that might also be involved.

Many of my hallucinations are seeing people or things. Like for example I was driving and saw a man and 2 children, all covered in shadow at night. It was in the middle of an especially chilly snowfall and logically no man would take his kids out in this weather at 10pm. When I checked my rearview mirror after I passed them, they were gone.

Sometimes when I drive, there are entities in the back of my car. Sometimes when I walk in hallways with weird lighting, I can see small things peeking out from the shadows, watching me as I watch them.

Once in a hotel room, a woman with a long tail lumbered around and then lumbered out when I asked her if she could help me get to sleep. Now that I think about it, it was kind of rude of me.

My counselor tells me that perhaps in another society I would be considered a spiritual leader or a shaman for the kinds of things I see. Spirits and such, I guess. I don’t like to think of myself as anything like that though. It sounds arrogant.