So I’ve heard about several people mentioning that they feel too masculine to be a femboy, despite their desire to become one and to fit into the stereotype of one and/or the culture. I just wrote a short thing today about the issue relating to that, and how one can do things to improve their look if that is truly what they desire, as well as how to come to terms with who you are, what you look like, and how it relates to being a femboy.
So say a man is really masculine. Like stereotypically masculine in terms of what modern society tends to envision. I’m talking the square jaw, hairy legs, broad shoulders, heavy-set eyes, big bushy brows, loads of body hair, big hairy feet, big hands… hell I could go on forever XD. You get the point. Let’s say there’s this one guy that has all of those attributes, but is not comfortable with them and wishes they were different. He wants to be a femboy, or at least embrace his feminine qualities to a certain degree. What does he do? He is self-conscious about wearing girl clothes or shaving his legs, or growing out his hair… and he doesn’t think that he would look good like that, so he doesn’t bother to change, despite how hard it is for him to try and cope with what he was born with. What should he do? This is a simple answer to a simple question.
The answer is always embrace yourself first. Don’t think about things too much. Act on what you know is going to allow you to feel true to how you were born. It is entirely understandable if a guy wants to appear effeminate but doesn’t feel he is capable of doing it. I myself feel similar at times. I’m an acrobat. I’m pretty damn buff, and I can’t wear everything that I would ever want without it barely fitting over my super broad shoulders. There are things one can do to make it easier though, if one feels the need to act. There is not always a need, but it depends on the person, and how dedicated they are to appearing a certain way. Below are a few tips to those of you who may be struggling with fitting into your idea of the stereotypically feminine aesthetic or the aesthetic/style of a femboy.
1. Completely shave all of your facial hair, wash with a soft soothing soap, and then apply a good quality moisturizer (preferably oil free, especially if you have issues with acne).
2. Grow your hair out and only shampoo once a week maybe two. You can go without shampooing for a long time. It sounds gross, but it’s better to do conditioner scrubs more often. Shampoo can be insanely damaging to your hair, especially in the long run, and you can preserve your hair and keep it free from split ends for several months if you take a break from all that shampooing. Conditioning more often will only strengthen your hair. Avoid dyes and heat as well. Wear a shower cap if you’re taking a shower and not conditioning or shampooing your hair. The less exposure your hair has to that degree of heat the better. If you take cold showers then you are fine. Just remember that if you want to grow you hair out really quickly. Stay completely natural, and then worry about doing crazy and colorful things to it after you have it at your desired length. You will likely regret it if you slow it down.
3. Shave your legs. Use plenty of shaving cream/conditioner/soap, or anything that works like a lubricant. Shave upwards against the hair to get the closet shave. Shave gently to avoid razor burn.
4. Learn how to correctly apply makeup that contours your face according to how it is uniquely shaped. With enough practice, contouring with makeup can transform your look to a point where you can look like an entirely different person. Make sure to use makeup that doesn’t irritate or promote acne. Good quality makeup will often be more expensive, but it will sometimes come in larger quantities and will likely be well worth the expense. You should learn how to correctly apply eyeliner, mascara, foundation, powder… all that stuff. You don’t need everything, but it is good to know how to use it all in case you ever feel like switching up your style a little bit. Makeup is like clothing. You can do so much with it, and you’d be amazed at how well you can change your entire appearance with just a few slight adjustments when you apply it. Watch YouTube tutorials on makeup. There are a gazillion tutorials relating to makeup, and many of them are quite good. I recommend Joseph Harwood. He is an androgynous makeup artist who is basically able to transform himself into anyone he wants through contouring, shading and a wide variety of other techniques relating to the art of makeup. He is AMAZING XD.
5. Pick clothes that contour to your body, and that give the illusion of a slimmer more curvy figure. A lot of this will take personal experimentation and finding the clothes that work for you. Ask around for help from people who are good with fashion and are willing to help you. You can always ask me though too.
Ask me any questions anytime! Sometimes I get insanely busy and it gets really hard for me to find time for social media. Sometimes I can’t get back for days and occasionally even weeks. Lol I know it sucks… but that’s what you get when you are trying to go to college, maintain a farm, work two jobs and record your music all at the same time, all the while living an hour and a half out of the city… But I will do my best to post stuff and answer questions as often as I can! I hope you all are doing well. There are plenty more posts to come. =^-^=