hair bender

@kenobi-and-barnes @fireflyfish @jhaernyl @i-am-not-a-committee @sanerontheinside @the-last-hair-bender

I know I’ve got an AU problem, but consider:

  • Obi-Wan Kenobi is not found by the Jedi Order. He serves in some capacity on Stewjon’s planetary legislature, perhaps as a page? but it’s just not for him.
  • Everyone expected him to have a brilliant political career, due to his family’s history, Stewjon’s tradition of public service, and Stewjon’s respected position as one of the founding systems of the Republic.
  • When the Clone Wars break out, Obi-Wan joins the military. Even though standard humans aren’t typically sent out onto battlefields (generally being put in the Senate Guard or as generals or admirals or serving in a bureaucratic or administrative role, no matter what their aptitude, thanks to the ingrained prejudice against clones), through sheer guts and sass, Obi-Wan gets himself assigned to a combat team as a sniper, in the Grand Army of the Republic’s equivalent of the Pararescue Jumpers.
  • Obi-Wan quickly becomes a fundamental part of the team, despite having gone through basic training somewhere far from Kamino. He’s issued a serial number similar (though not identical) to the clones on the squad (similar, but not identical, because those serial numbers are the Kaminoans’ identifiers as to who was cloned when and in what “batch” and Obi-Wan is standard human), and getting a name from the clones. Technically he’s Sergeant Kenobi but he frequently goes months without hearing “Kenobi” at all, just the name he’s been given by his brothers. (I need name ideas, guys.)
  • Also, swearing in Mando’a.
  • He gains a reputation for making “impossible” shots (such as shooting rocket-propelled grenades out of midair), due to his latent Force-sensitivity, but also because he’s just a darn good shot, with or without the Force.
  • Eventually they’re assigned to rescue Skywalker and some of the 501st. Everything goes normally until the pickup arrives and everyone lopes on board. Obi-Wan whips off his helmet and starts complaining about how his scope got knocked loose when he swung the rifle up to take out a clanker. Anakin stammers a bit and finally manages “You’re not a clone?!”
  • During Order 66, Obi-Wan throws a hitch into Sidious’ plans simply by being there and not understanding what’s going on. (Part of the reason only clones are part of the combat teams is because of Order 66, and the control chips can’t really be implanted in the heads of regular Republic citizens. Legally, clones are not Republic citizens; legally, they aren’t even really recognized as people, creating a loophole by which Palpatine can exploit them.) He’s probably injured, ends up a deserter and on the run, and is employed as a bodyguard by the Royal Family of Alderaan, where he becomes one of the founders of the Rebellion.
  • Ahsoka Tano, of all people, starts to help Obi-Wan utilize his Force-sensitivity. By the time the Skywalker twins are nearing adulthood, Ahsoka Tano is by no means the last of the Jedi.
  • No one told Obi-Wan that Vader was really Anakin Skywalker, the man who was shocked to find out that Obi-Wan wasn’t a clone all those years ago. Obi-Wan is not happy about this and probably chews out a lot of people.
  • Luke Skywalker is not allowed anywhere near the Emperor. Between Obi-Wan and Ahsoka, Sidious is toast.
  • Either Anakin ends up listening to Ahsoka and abandoning Vader, or Obi-Wan kills Vader when Vader doesn’t listen. Not sure which.

For @kenobi-and-barnes, @zannatinuviel, @the-last-hair-bender, @jhaernyl, @sanerontheinside, @hellsbellssinclub, @poplitealqueen, @shadow-spires, @badwolfgirl01, @dwelian, @anvil527up, and everyone else who so kindly reblogged and commented. Also tagging @eirianerisdar because she’s one of my favorite fanfic authors and I would love to hear what she thinks.

Before the fic, which is part of the Obi-Wan-as-part-of-the-GAR-equivalent-of-pararescue-AU, I’d like a few opinions. What should I tag/title this AU as, and what should Obi-Wan’s nickname (the one given to him by the other men on his team) be?

Also, if it’s not clear, Owen and Erirea are Obi-Wan’s younger brother and twin sister.


               Dear Mum,

               I’m sorry I haven’t written in a while. Life got in the way and I can’t really tell you where I was sent, same as always. Give my love to Dad, and Owen. How are Erirea and my niece? Tell her I miss her, and that I expect to see her very grown up on my next leave.

               I met Anakin Skywalker on the last mission. Turns out the men we were sent to rescue were his. I don’t really know what to think of him; there’s a sort of inscrutability about him, though you can always see exactly what he’s thinking on his face. I suppose the cousins will want to know what he’s like. Tall, perhaps Owen’s height. Blue eyes. A scowl like the war carved it permanently into his face.

               What really bothers me is how people treat me differently, in and out of uniform. It’s all tied up in how they treat the clones, as well. When I’ve got the helmet on, no one looks at me twice, but when I’m the one strange face among all the identical ones, everyone takes notice. They don’t treat clones like human beings, Mum. It makes me angry.

               I’m actually writing this in a cabin on General Luminara Unduli’s flagship Tranquility. Though, again, I can’t say where we are. I doubt I’d even be allowed to view the coordinates.

               I got an invitation to supper in the General’s stateroom, and really only accepted it out of curiosity. I feel as if it was an insult to the rest of my team, but what really burns is that they just shrugged it off. “There’s no point in snubbing them, Sarge,” Dusty told me, when I tried to explain it to them.

               Sometimes it feels as if we’re taught to view the Jedi as some kind of glorious pantheon when they’re ultimately just as fallible as we are.

               I met Skywalker’s apprentice Ahsoka Tano and Master Unduli’s second-in-command, Wolfe, an experienced veteran with the scars to prove it. Padawan Tano is a Togruta whose eyes seem larger than the rest of her face, and General Unduli is a striking woman with an inscrutable face and a sense of humor that slides up under one’s guard like a rapier. After dinner, we played a Chandrilan game which they call “sabacc” but it’s really entirely different. There’s much less luck and much more strategy involved.

               I made a fourth for Padawan Tano, Master Unduli, and Commander Wolfe. Skywalker didn’t play.

               About halfway through the game, Master Unduli casually said “Are you aware that you’re Force-sensitive, Sergeant Kenobi?” I was startled enough that I dropped my cards.

               It seems if they’d found me when I was a kid, I could have been a Jedi myself. Padawan Tano asked me if I wished they had. I told her that I didn’t know. She seemed surprised. I guess being a Jedi was her lifelong dream.

               I’m not sure if I wish I had been found by the Jedi when I was little. I’m glad I have the perspective on life that I do.

               Skywalker wasn’t happy with my answer. He tried to brush it off, but I could tell by the way he said it: “I suppose you were the only kid in the galaxy who didn’t dream of being a Jedi.” It was more than a little frightening. I think he wasn’t deliberately being menacing, but it was still intimidating.

               “Of course I dreamed about it as a kid,” I said. “But it’s not what happened. There’s no point in getting upset over what never will be.” Master Unduli raised her eyebrows at me; I think she was impressed. Skywalker rolled his eyes, which incidentally dispelled the terrifying impression he’d left on me a moment before.

               Honestly, I’m glad that all my missions have been so classified. If I was doing anything more widely known, I’d probably have ended up a celebrity, and you know how much I would hate that.

               Your devoted son,

               Obi-Wan Kenobi


I’ve decided: this is important enough to multitag like crazy. 

​, would you like some fluffy kittens? here are some fluffy kittens. 
@norcumi - here’s to a beautiful finish to Sass and Murder XD 
@punsbulletsandpointythings - u definitely need some kittens
@lacefedora, hi! ur art is beautiful :)
@poplitealqueen​ - kittens for bad brain days? 
@leechbrain - relevant to your interests, I think 
@ideordinal​ - *waves* hey how was ur day? 
@lilyrose225writes - heyyyy beta sorry for sending u miserable headcanons all the time, thank you for always reassuring me my fic is likeable
@jhaernyl been seeing less of u the past few days, how’s it hanging?
@the-last-hair-bender - look at these floofs
@myurbandream - hullo, here are fluffy things
@doctorwithafryingpan - moar kittens XD

Ppl reading/commenting on my fic: I see you and I love you, thank you so much.  I’m glad you liked the fluff! (that was the biggest struggle of the last idk how long - had no idea how to write fluff)

I’ve also apparently picked up some new followers along the way - HI! Welcome ^///^
This blog is shiny things, fluffy things, art reblogs, and fic. (If you’re inclined to dig deeper you’ll find some ish-ish poetry and a sad short story or two.) 
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Enjoy !

What I’m writing:

Tagged by @kristsune

So I’m gonna focus on what I’m actively writing instead of the 35 WIPs in my folder

Originally posted by ardennt

  1. Overdose - Rex handles Umbara very badly, and takes GAR-grade stims so he doesn’t have to face his night terrors.
  2. Sir - the Echo/Rex sequel to Buir (AKA the “slutty shiny Echo” fic)
  3. Personal Jesus - an excuse for Dom!Anomaly in the Sex and Candy verse
  4. Walk Through the Fire - more of the RepComm Tire Fire couple, Atin and Sev/
  5. An untitled Rex fic, post bio-chip arc.  

Tagging @pumpkin-lith, @fandumbandflummery, @wolveria, @gallusrostromegalus, @the-last-hair-bender, and anyone else who wants to!