anonymous asked:

when i was 6 and my little sister was 5, she won a goldfish at this carnival thing at my elementary school and named the goldfish gus. eventually, i had the bright idea to test what would happen if i took it out of water but i got really disgusted when i took it out so instead i threw it out the window. my sister saw that the fish tank was empty later so she asked me what happened and i told her that gus went to say goodbye to his dying mother in denver. she cried.

hahahahhahahahaahhah fuck such an elaborate and well constructed lie