ha i made this with a thing from facebook

things derek malik nurse has actually said out loud unsarcastically that has made everyone in the vicinity want to punch him

  • “No i deleted my facebook two years ago because it was making me feel way too disconnected from my inner voice”
  • “maybe that test would have gone better if I wasn’t an aquarius. my horoscope was right. i should have stayed in today.”
  • “sitting in a pile of leafs is just how i feel, yknow, connected,”
  • “i gotta go check out the new vegan grill down the street, i heard they have a deconstructed black bean burger with kale chips that’s pretty good”

anonymous asked:

"Scully, please teach me how to use Twitter, nothing makes sense anymore."

“Scully, please teach me how to use Twitter.  Nothing makes sense anymore.”  Scully glances up from her laptop at Mulder, who’s leaning back in his chair with his feet kicked up on the desk, frowning at his phone.

“Mulder,” she sighs, “do you remember what happened when you discovered Pinterest?  All I heard about for days were ‘natural’ cures for everyday ailments that have absolutely no basis in science.  And you still haven’t finished half the repurposing projects you’ve got strewn all over the basement.”

“I’m getting to them, Scully,” he promises.  “It’s just that the people who posted those tutorials make it seem a lot easier than it really is.”

“And how about when you got my nephew to teach you how to use Snapchat?” she continues.  “Skinner couldn’t look either of us in the eye for weeks.”

“In my defense,” Mulder argues, “your names are right next to each other, and I didn’t have my reading glasses.  Just be glad I didn’t accidentally send that picture to your brother instead.”

“And then,” Scully steamrollers on, “there was the Facebook debacle.  How many times did I get up in the middle of the night and find you arguing politics on your computer with some idiot you went to middle school with?  Mulder, you are never going to change someone’s mind in a Facebook debate.”

“I wasn’t arguing to try and change his mind, Scully,” Mulder says.  “I know he’s an idiot.  I was arguing for the benefit of people who might be reading who haven’t made up their minds about the issue yet.”  Scully rolls her eyes.

“One way or another, Mulder,” she sighs, “I am not teaching you how to Tweet.  The last thing I need is Skinner finding out that one of his agents has gotten into a Twitter war with the moron from that ‘Ancient Aliens’ show.”  Mulder opens his mouth to respond, and Scully holds up her hand, forestalling him.  “Let’s face it, Mulder,” she says, turning back to her work.  “Social media just isn’t for you.”

Over the last couple of months, I’ve had dozens of people ask me (through my blogs, through our butch support group on facebook, and through our local meetup group) if I could help them figure out if they were butch. This has ranged from “can you be a sounding board for me to work through some stuff?” (which I’m always happy to do, makes me feel useful!) to “can you basically just give me the answer?” (to which i would like to say, “i don’t know a fuckin thing my guy”). 

Its made me realize what a rocky (ha, ha) terrain this is for so many people. god, I know how it felt for me to settle into butch, like pulling on your most weather worn boots that have, over time, totally aligned to the shape of your feet. Sometimes I forget what it was like to break them in. Sometimes I forget how lost you feel before you’ve found your home. If I can raise the lantern to the path behind me, I’d very much like to do that, for anyone still stumbling through the dark.

When people come to me and want to work out their feelings about their relationship to butch, I don’t ask questions like, have you ever been mistaken for a man, are you attracted to femmes, is your hair short, do you have a strong build, are you dysphoric, do you wear flannel shirts and solid men’s shoes. These are all things associated with butchness, and certainly with good reason, but they aren’t the definition. This isn’t about what you put on your body. Neither is it a wishy washy identity thing - it’s something you can’t take off or put on, just something you can choose to own or not. I am butch no matter what I do.

Think about the last time you saw a butch in public. Like, a real live butch stranger, existing and living out there. How did you feel? Did your heart light up for a moment, hoping she’d see you? If you’ve had the pleasure to be around other butches already, do you feel camaraderie? Does something hard and rough unfold just a little at the edges before you go back out into the world? When you read butch words, butch history, do you feel rooted and real? Does it make you feel like you can live?

When I tried to hide my butch self, it was miserable - and everyone could see through it anyway. When I came home, I found myself. I found myself in womanhood. I found myself in lesbianism. I found a paper trail of proof that I exist, have existed throughout history, will continue to exist, that I don’t have to stuff my unwilling and untamed body into a falsehood of femininity or the dissociative state of manhood. Suddenly, I had roots. Suddenly, my feet were on the ground - armored by these old weather worn boots that have seen me through so much.

(pic from fun home by alison bechdel)

What the ever loving fuck is wrong with you people?

You people  You Antis, NST, Truthers, Haters, wtfer name you want to be called or are called. You people. You know I’m talking to you @noshippingallowed @contemplatingoutlander @goldenoutlander @adhara112 @aliceinoutlanerland (oops you forgot the d in outlander. get a d.) @whylimewhyanything (put the lime in the coconut) @whoreallyknowswho (it’s whom! whom! unless you just forgot to finish your sentence) @prodigiousreblogger @bestof60 (are you 60?) @vividdreamer318 (your imagination is certainly leading you astray) @breezylouisey (is that you weezy?) @momofmusa (i thought you were mom of USA lol)  @alittlebitmasss (oops your s key got stuck)
Anyway, there are more of you and I’m sorry I didn’t give you a moment of thrill by acknowledging you by name but I mentioned the Tumblr accounts that I’ve seen making horrendously wild, hateful, fictional, hurtful accusations against other Outlander fans with no speck of proof - accusations meant to inspire others to emulate you and spread hate to those people as well. Let me get this straight. From what I can tell, you are super hopping mad about the content of certain Twitter and Instagram accounts. Fine. Totally fine. You are entitled to your opinions. I can see why those accounts might make some people mad. I mean, irrelevant to my life but maybe not yours.  You are mad that certain Twitter and Instagram accounts have been created for the sole purpose of throwing shade and mocking a certain celebrity you hold in high esteem. I get that. Fine. Be outraged! Express yourselves!!
Speaking of fine I know you will go through this post with a fine toothed comb for anything you can argue with and attack me over because god forbid you actually read the message, digest the information, thoughtfully consider the content and then share your thoughts and opinions and maybe answer some of my questions. Nope that’s not your style. Attack attack attack half-cocked and don’t put any thought or concern for reality into it. Yes you are the borg of Antis as the foil to the Shippers. I didn’t create that world, you did. You wanted to be the anti-shippers. You are gathered on Tumblr together to be this Anti-Shipper fighting army. Go forth and fight uhh I guess? WHY???? 
See, shippers are motivated by love. That’s really obvious. There are all types of shippers just as there are all types of people (and even all types of antis), but what brings them together is not just their love of Outlander (and you guys love Outlander too! Whee we have something in common) but their love of the LOVE parts of Outlander and all the LOVE associated with Outlander in promos, BTS, interviews, Q&As, social media banter between the cast and crew, etc. LOVE is LOVE is LOVE is LOVE is LOVE is LOVE is LOVE is LOVE. So you generally don’t see shippers on social media attacking people with hatred and lies and accusations of criminal activity. Wait wait wait. Correction! YOU see shippers doing those things but no one else does. You mostly see shippers doing those things with accounts that aren’t even recognized shipper names. They are basically troll accounts that you have deduced are shipper accounts. You do have these long convoluted narratives of what certain shippers are alleged to have done and you bandy them about so frequently that your telephone game grows legs and walks it’s own marathon and becomes some weird beast-mode attack shipper who does horrible things. You say you SAW these things but you haven’t. Show me a tweet, a facebook post, an instagram post from an Outlander fan who identifies herself as a shipper and has a known persona in the fandom and is attacking, hating, committing these horrendous crimes you claim. What I mean is, SHOW ME THE MONEY! SHOW ME PROOF to back up your narrative. You have specifically named a number of Outlander fans and made outrageous claims as to their character, behavior, beliefs, actions, off-line actions and more. YOU HAVE NO PROOF BECAUSE THESE STORIES ARE FICTION.
I’ll give you an example of how your lies have grown wings, run a marathon and turned into beast-mode:
So a certain blue check account posts that a certain object of your hatred and hate-mongering did something so illegal that she would have been arrested and would still be in jail. You all headnod, mouth breath, feel righteous for having attacked her because you were soooo right, bang away at your keyboards and continue the lies and hatred and stoke the fires for uhhh fun? Yet you all know that she isn’t in jail and couldn’t have done this highly illegal thing because you watch her every move and you saw her posting pics of herself just last weekend participating in a fitness event. Hmmmm. Are you collectively dumbing each other down with your groupthink or all you all that stupid? YOU KNOW IT’S A LIE. But you’ve all convinced each other it’s ok to lie about it, malign, spread hatred and misinformation about certain fans and tarnish their reputation in the fandom because… because? because why??? Help me out here. So it’s because someone has said rude bad things to an actress you believe is Sam Heughan’s girlfriend even though he has never once said so. You BELIEVE it so it’s your reality. And the fans that you malign? You do that because they believe something else. But the weirdest thing is that you do malign them by tossing out totally unfounded and false accusations about their behavior and ascribe all kinds of unsavory activities, motives, and behaviors to these fans you have chosen to malign. You do the thing to them that you so claim to hate they are doing to the objects of your admiration. 
I’m still working on this and I still need your help. So because you BELIEVE that two actors are dating and BELIEVE that it’s wrong that internet trolls make claims that they are not and some internet trolls say really rude things and tag them, you feel fully justified in making claims that the trolls are not just trolls but actual recognizable Outlander fans. Are you like shippers of trollworld or something? 
I’ll just come right out and say it. Kim Hickey is not behind any of those trolls accounts you claim she is. I know this and you know this. You know which accounts are legitimately hers because she identifies herself. You are even attacking her My Peak Challenge account that she posts inspirational memes and encourages people to donate to Bloodwise. Are you for fucking real? You’re attacking a charity endeavor in your blind hatred of…. hatred of who fucking knows.  Even if you didn’t know she wasn’t behind the troll accounts, you absolutely have no basis for claiming she is. You are making shit up and publicly proclaiming it as truth just like that thing that Shippers do that you claim to hate.  Also, let’s talk about me:  I am a public person online. I don’t hide behind cutesy names. You can look me up and it won’t even be doxing me because it’s all right there, isn’t it? I have no sock accounts. I put my name on all my accounts because I own what I say and share. This tumblr account was created in the middle of last summer as a parody of Starz Obsessable campaign therefore it did not need my name on it. I never had a Tumblr account before that and I have never even sent anons on Tumblr. I never pretended I was anyone else or made any attempt to be anyone else. I posted freely about myself and my life when it was topical, including photos of myself. If you were like BINGO I’m such a supersleuth I figured out who is behind that blog!! you’re not smart or observant. It was obvious. The thing is, though, shippers didn’t know who I was. Not because they didn’t know who was behind “Obsessive Sassenach” but because they didn’t know who Nipuna was. Isn’t that funny? One of the Outlander fans on the top of your BAD SHIPPER LIST WHO MUST BE EXTERMINATED list isn’t even known by other shippers. What makes me a shipper? Just that I have heart eyes for Sam and Cait and think they have chemistry and oh wait, whoah, ZOMG, Arthur Kade thinks that too. Josh Horowitz does too! and ummmm ummmm that one lady at TCA that one year and that one book author who was on the NYT best seller list and you know I could go on. It’s not a crime to be fully happy to enjoy Sam and Caitriona’s chemistry. And if that makes me a shipper, yay. But the only reason I’m actually a known component of the shipper community now is because you guys have dragged my name around and created ridiculous lies about me. It’s like I’m some sort of Shipper Legend (to you, not shippers) who does these super crazy Shipper things in AntiLand. Remember the grave story that was created by one of you weirdos because a family friend of mine who is a caretaker for a military graveyard in the USA was friends with Sam’s father? You guys turned it into: That Crazy Shipper Nipuna stalks Sam’s father’s grave in hopes of running into him and Caitriona making a baby on his dad’s grave in Scotland. Or something like that. Anyway, tour bus guides in Scotland think there are crazy Outlander fans who stalk Sam at his father’s grave but if they stop to think they realize they don’t even know if he has a grave or if it’s even in Scotland. 
You’re maligning the whole fucking fandom you freaks! You’re creating these outrageous, convoluted piece of fiction because you are all worked up about uhh something and then you tag other nasty people and get them to repeat the stories and then the stories get embellished and repeated and you sit back and watch the telephone game continue. But don’t you realize that you’re fucking the whole thing up for yourselves too? I mean, I guess not if you like chaos and mayhem. But most of you profess to care about people being nice and kind and cry out that bullying is bad and wrong. But then you do just that when you pick an Outlander fan and create detailed and convoluted lies about her behavior.  The people you lie about know they are lies, sure. And lots of other people know they are lies and ignore you, but you repeat the lies over and over and you know that saying about how if you repeat a lie often enough people will start to believe you. So you repeat and repeat and then sit back and with self satisfied smiles. Or maybe it’s just that your mouth is open because you’re breathing through it. Whatever. I don’t know your motives. I don’t know what attracts you to fan the way you do. I don’t know what fulfills you. I know it’s not LOVE. But do you even know? Are you just running around half-cocked and brainless and letting yourselves be lied to? What gives? Can you help me understand why you are constantly naming and targeting certain people and pointing others to attack them and if that doesn’t work creating stories that will hopefully motivate them to attack? WHY???

a few people were unsure about the whole 88RISING thing and I’m gonna try my best to explain it. 88RISING is a platform that promotes a lot of Asian hip hop music. (There’s good article on it over at Forbes that I need to find)

joji’s music has been featured on their YouTube channel and Facebook page a few times. there’s been videos made for medicine and world$tar money, audio posted for thom, and you suck charlie was put on their Facebook page.

They also drop a lot of hints that music from him will be coming soon. like when they posted you suck Charlie to Facebook they said “pink season was wild, joji season could be out there somewhere”. Along with the “CHLOE BURBANK 17” in the description of the world$tar money video.

I hope this clears up as much as possible.

anonymous asked:

I'm suddenly terrified of buying anything anywhere! How do I know if I buy something online if I'm buying someone's stolen art. How would you suggest? All I know is google image check . Is that enough do you think, as someone who wants to buy something, to have done precautions? (Apologies for English :))

Hi anon ^^

First, don’t apologize for your English. Mine is well..some sort of strange Frenglish, so you see, no problem! ^^

I’m suddenly terrified of buying anything anywhere! How do I know if I buy something online if I’m buying someone’s stolen art. 

The best way is using Google Image Reverse Rearch, locating the artist’s page and see if they have a shop. If they don’t, don’t hesitate to to contact them and to ask them “Hey, sorry to bother you, I saw this item at this one shop and I wanted to know if it was your shop or if you gave the permission for your art to be sold there. Thanks”. When in doubt, it’s the best thing to do!

Otherwise:

- Don’t buy from Tee Chip (and from their Facebook sponsored pages), you can be sure that a lot of their items are made out of stolen artworks. Same for Ebay, particularly big anime shops. It’s incredible the number of Yuri!!! on Ice items you can find on eBay that have been made out of stolen designs. I saw pillows, mugs, phone cases that were made out of artworks found on Pixiv and Tumblr. Pffff.

- Don’t buy from a seller that has artworks that have different styles. It’s a bit strange. I mean, when you look at my shop, you can be sure that it’s the same person who drew everything, you have a coherence. When you have a lack of coherence in a shop, it’s not a good sign.

I hope I was able to help you! Thanks a lot for your message ^^

Originally posted by stitchholdsmyheart

recently facebook has been bombarding me with memories from hobbitcon and I came across this pic of @bittersuites and I as thranduil and his wife <3

I loved cosplaying an elf tho personality wise I am more of a hobbit and this dress was one of the first things I made that I actually felt was technically not a piece of shit.

hobbitcon and the hobbit have been a massive influence on my journey as a sewer and cosplayer so it not excisting anymore and the films being over is still a very weird feeling to cope with.

So if you excuse me for a minute I’m gonna go unwind with an old fashioned bathroom cry 。:゚(;´∩`;)゚:。

anonymous asked:

I recently saw a post, reblogged by this blog I follow that calls out racism, etc. Basically someone said Tarjei's lips were perfect on Twitter, including a picture. People on tumblr reacted by making fun of them and I got that typical making-fun-of-white-guy vibe from it. Usually I don't really care but? ? Tarjei doesn't deserve that? He's just a TEEN who has a role that's really important to LGBT+ people and people w mental illness and then all these people who don't even know of him do this?

Yeah, when skam season 1 started gaining recognition, in the very beginning was the peak time. I remember it. The “"official”“ skam Facebook group was made with maybe 4000 members, and many of the actors, Marlon, Ulrikke, Josefine, Tarjei and Ina atleast were in it, and fans would post things and the actors would post things, it was super cool because it was so chill? Like the actors were normal people. Then the group started to grow. A lot of people began to obsess over characters (Chris P especially) and began pointing out flaws in the characters, like Jonas’ eyebrows and Isaks lips and how Chris P showed his gums as he smiled. It didn’t take long until all the actors left the group. It was super sad!
I’m so against criticising the looks of characters and ESPECIALLY actors. Of course I’m not perfect, I’ve made fun of Kylo Rens hair and Benedict Cumberbatches face and all of William but SKAM has really made me realise that actors are human. It’s completely okay to hate a fictional character, it’s completely okay to not find actors attractive, but it’s not okay to call actors ugly and make fun of them, not if you don’t like the character they play, not for any reason at all. To everyone: please think before you post! Don’t be rude and mean towards celebrities just because you view them more as objects than actual people…

tgd characters + social media:

-shao has all his accounts on private but his snapchat is thirst trap after thirst trap and parkour. his ig is for shoes and the occassional picture of the get down brothers. he always subtweets mylene even tho she blocked him ages ago. hes also flash’s party promoter, and is the first person to tweet about some funny (read: cute) thing zeke did. he also posts music recs once a month (either trap or 90s rap, some a$ap rocky too). hes got the les inferno twitter and ig #blockt

-zeke is looooowwkeey an ankh he follows all the big hotep instagrams and loves the picture of the naked black woman with the earth as her ass (y'all kno the one I’m talking about) but he doesn’t tell anybody. he has a link to his soundcloud on everything. posts black and white pictures of himself, the ny skyline, and flashes of mylene and shao. he tweets lyrics (half the time about mylene) and stories about ra geeking out over something (they interact the most over social media. every tbt post is about some wild shit he and ra got into when they were in middle school). he’s the receiver of all of shaos thirst traps

-mylene has the most followers out of anyone. her snapchat story is watched by dozens and is mostly her doing cute things around manhattan with yolanda and regina. her pictures on ig always look super professional (zeke took em lol) and she does the occasional look book. she has a youtube where she posts videos of her singing, and actually got a couple songs of hers on itunes. shes the biggest beyonce stan and has gotten a few of her tweets favorited by her. she also tweets advice and useful tips, but is always threatening to block people. subtweets about zeke’s buffoonery on a daily basis.

-yolanda is a big youtuber who mostly vlogs and does reviews, but will sometimes post a sketch video or two a month. her snaps are mostly of her brothers doing geeky shit and her cackling in the background. her vlogs are super personal without seeming super personal, and they’re funny as hell. wokest of the crew cause she calls out zeke’s lowkey hotepery. she rarely posts to ig because she feels like all her pictures are trash when they’re not, but when she does post she gets tons of likes.

-regina is p big on twitter. her stories and threads get thousands of retweets a day and she’s constantly getting sponsored. huge meme lord, and exposes uglies on a daily basis. her ig is all pictures of her and yolanda cause They Gay™. her snaps are wild but she actually doesn’t use sc that much compared to the others. she has a tumblr and its mostly new wave memes and aesthetic posts, but she’ll sneak in something really personal but feel guilty about it for some reason.

-ra is the second biggest meme lord. he runs a marvel/dc blog (his fave is probably iron man smh) and writes star wars fic. posted the pics of him dressed as Finn at comic con all over ig. he also posts vintage comic finds, and pictures of him and his brothers around the park. his tweets are always really insightful and deep, but he never realizes it until his notifications blow tf up. a video of him calling out someone who was bullying boo boo went viral and he doesn’t know how to handle it. his snaps are of zeke and him being goofy.

-boo’s name on everything is “booboothefool” and he mostly posts dancing videos on instagram. he’ll sometimes post a singing video, which surprises everyone every single time. he makes youtube poops even tho its 2016, and is mostly subscribed to prank channels. he is the third biggest meme lord, and probably lowkey a troll, but a chaotic good one.

-dizzee is an art hoe and only really uses ig, twitter, and sometimes tumblr but its rare. he mostly just posts pictures of his graffiti and he never shows his face in the pictures that are actually of him. he uses really funky filters too. his tweets are somehow more fake deep than zekes, and he calls everything An Experience™. probably obsessed with kanye west and is always live blogging his trash fashion show. he also posts a lot of music recs, but they’re mostly stuff from the 70s and 80s.

-idk who thor is but! he’s super lowkey about everything and only uses facebook to post his graffiti art and insightful quotes. comments on all of pakoussa’s posts and secretly keeps an eye on dizzee’s ig.

-that rich white punk girl stays in zeke’s dms, runs a black and white blog that’s mostly AHS: murder house gifs, posts gore on every account she has, tweets “#whitegirlsevolving” and snapchats herself twirling a butcher knife around her tiddies

I was going through my old facebook photos and found this from Jump Festa 2011. I was young, still straightening my hair, and Bleach was still a thing people enjoyed.

Flash forward 6 years and here we are. Bleach is dead. Ichigo has been castrated and is balding. Renji knocked up his bestfriend and had to marry her. Nothing’s wrong with Byakuya, though. Aside from having Renji as brother in law, he made it out alive.

It’s Been Your Username

This is what happened right before the new video was uploaded ok I don’t make this shit up

He had multiple tabs open; YouTube, Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook. His hand rested on the mouse as he clicked on each tab over and over. YouTube, Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook. YouTube, Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook. 

“Did you do it?” he heard a voice coming from behind him.

“I’m scared.” he spoke quietly. “I don’t know if I’m ready.”

“You’re the one that said it’s not a big deal.”

“But it is a big deal, Phil.” he said as he turned around to face him. “This has been my life for the last 7 years. It’s been my branding. It’s been who I am.”

“No, it’s been your username.” Phil said. “It doesn’t change all the creative videos you’ve made or the incredible things you’ve accomplished or the amazing person you’ve become.”

“I thought you were the amazing one.” he said with a smirk.

“I am.” Phil smiled smugly. “And I’m sticking with it.” he continued. “But it’s time you move on. I know how badly you want to. You’ve grown up, and that’s okay. This is just another step toward embracing who you are. It’s just a couple of clicks away.”

He looked at Phil with wide eyes before turning back around to face the screen. He took a deep breath before clicking Save on each updated profile.

Phil walked over and wrapped his arms around him from behind. “I’m so proud of you, Daniel.”

The origin of my atheism

I’ve been trying to figure out when, exactly, the seed of doubts started. I know I was searching for the real truth from about age 18 to age 28. I read the Bible and had many questions my youth pastor couldn’t answer which led me to ask other bible scholars these questions and listening to their answers. The first thing that struck me was the concept of free will. I couldn’t find any evidence in the Bible describing what was defined as free will. That led me to reading books by authors who wrote about our absence of free will. My pastor would talk about our freedom in Christ but the Bible called us elect and would consistently show me that we have no choice.

Another thing that bothered me was God’s ability of being tricked. You see numerous examples in Genesis and throughout the Old Testament. If god is all powerful, how can he be fooled? My rationalization of this was God wasn’t tricked. He was allowing things to happen because he planned everything. Making us believe we are in control over our lives.

I avoided behavior that I knew were against the Bible. When I got older, I hired a gay man to work in my comic book store, (I had my justifications owning the store) and realized he wasn’t a sex crazy pervert. I brought this up with my pastor and he reminded me of the evils of “gay culture” and how my employees presence would end my marriage and slowly corrupt my “sexual appetite”. I never fired him, but he only worked for me a few months before he moved away.

I suffer from anxiety and depression. I’m type two bipolar. I knew some of that at the time. When I turned 30, I began drinking alcohol. It calmed me. It made me happy. Yes. I’ve had bad times drinking but it was a way to make me feel normal. I’d say from 30 to 38, I wasn’t as hardcore a Christian as I was in my 20s. I justified drinking and rarely attended church due to guilt.

I decided to go to college in 2010. My English Comp 1 instructor was openly atheist and gay. At this point I had all of the judgement of my hardcore beliefs but no reason to have them. It’s something I still struggle with at times. He really made me think about what I read in a way I never had.

Another instructor was an amazing world civ teacher. She was a believer but she would show the class the story of Noah and in the same sentence, talk about similar stories written long before the book of genesis. She also made me think about evolution. How we are still evolving. Because of this, I decided to do my own research. I talked to my wife about things I was learning. It was at this point, I started reading the Bible more and praying more. I kept asking God to help me prove he was real. That he was there. No answer.

It took about a year and a family emergency to ultimately come to the decision that everything I ever believed was wrong. Religion is a hoax. The Christian God and Jesus were made up. At some point, I changed my religious status to atheist. I lost 13 “friends” on Facebook. Many were friends I knew from the various churches I had attended. The rest were those I considered close. There were two who kept me as a friend but I had to unfriend them. One was a militant catholic who challenged anything I said because my opinions are invalid due to my non belief, and I never talk religion on my page, it was mostly political things. The other was the person who originally “brought me to the lord”. He has become a pathetic, predatory, sadistic sociopath over the years. He puts on a persona of moral Christian while having a secret life preying on women who are intellectually weak and vulnerable. He would make passive pokes at me and message me about his concerns. I had to unfriend him because he claimed my son would commit suicide because atheists have no morals or joy.

I’ve been atheist for over three years now. I’ve been happier than ever. I care about people more than ever. I want to show people I’m not an evil person. If I’m asked if I’m a believer, I’ll say no. I’m not afraid to say it. However, I’m not an activist and I’m not one to be public about my non belief. When people find out they’re always shocked. Hopefully I can change the preconceived notions about atheism for someone.

Realistic

Rating:18+

Words:3519

Pairing: StilesXReader

Y/N/N- your nickname (Idk if that is what people use but i just put that there incase anyone get confused)

A/N: So I have been kind of thinking bout this for a while and this is my first fic so please try to be nice. I love dirty talking Stiles just as much as the next reader and I understand that the real way Stiles loses his v card was in Eichen house, but I kind if wanted to do a more funny, realistic version of Stiles and the reader’s first time so like Stiles obviously isn’y gonna talk dirty the first time he has sex. I am going to start taking requests now. A massive thanks to @dumbass-stilinski and @writing-obrien for looking and editing a lot of this. Sorry for being a pain and I really appreciate it. I also want to write more fics but I have no idea what to write about so requests would be great. I already have begun a mini series. Okay, sorry for the long note I’m done now, Enjoy.

_______

As soon as I became part of the pack, even before that, when Scott introduced me to Stiles in freshman year, there was a connection. We literally had eye sex for a solid 15 seconds before I heard his quiet, gravelly voice.

“Hi. Y/N, right?”

“Yeah aha, nice to meet you, Stiles.” I put my hand out for a handshake in an attempt to be polite. He returned the favour by grabbing my hand and bringing it to his lips, which sent a confusing shiver through me as he quickly pulled away.

“I am so sorry, I don’t know why I did that. Uhh anyway, Scott has been saying nothing but good things about you. I even looked on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and-wow what a disaster, this is the worst first impression I have ever made in my life. I’m gonna go before I make a fool of myself. I’ll see you at lacrosse practice Scott. It was really nice to meet you, Y/N.”  

Just as Stiles disappeared from the hallway, Scott said, “Wow, I have never seen Stiles so nervous and awkward. I mean, Stiles is socially awkward but that was a whole new level.”

“No that wasn’t even bad, I made it so awkward when I just stared at him for like a thousand hours without saying hello.”

“Y/N it’s fine. It’s not the last time you are going to talk to him. And when you hang out with him, it will be with the pack, which I will introduce you too at lacrosse practice. See you then?”

I nodded. When I thought I heard the last of Scott, he quickly turned around and whispered. “Oh and by the way, I was with Stiles when he was on your Facebook and trust me, he was really impressed with what he saw.”

That was two years ago; and I am still waiting for my two year crush, Stiles Stilinski to make a move. I always knew from the moment he placed his lips on my hand, we had a connection, and more than just a friendly one. We always hang out, but it’s never just us two. It can’t be because I literally have no social skills, especially with the opposite gender. I mean, Stiles is awkward with few social skills, but I was way worse. I can’t even focus when he is within five steps of me, he intimidates me, but it’s because he has no idea. Everyone in the pack knew how we felt about each other that even chemosignals weren’t obvious enough. There just was and is no time to do anything because we are always so busy keeping Beacon Hills safe.

_______

I woke up on Monday and looked at the time, oh shit! I woke up at 7:30 am and a) not only did I sleep through my alarm, but my bus was coming at 7:45. I fell out of bed, ran downstairs, ate some cereal, brushed my teeth, grabbed my backpack and dashed out of the house to the bus stop.

I sprinted around the corner and saw the bus driving away from my stop. I finally stopped running and took a second, putting my hands on my head, breathing in and screaming. This has only happened to me nearly every day this term, and it’s only first term. The only way I can get to school is to walk.

I walked surprisingly quickly to make up time, as it takes forever to get to school this way.

“Miss the bus again Y/N/N?”

I turn around to see a blue jeep. Roscoe. Shit, it was Stiles stopping to talk, to me? ‘Okay just act cool.’ I said in my head.

“Yeah, how’d you know?” After I said that, I mentally face palm myself. Obviously he is literally seeing me walk to school instead of catching the bus.

“And I see you are going for the pyjama look today,” I was puzzled and confused with what he said when suddenly, I look down and my cheeks turned instantly red. I was getting ready so quickly, I forgot to put on clothes. I felt my insides fill up with embarrassment and humiliation. “If you want, I can drive you back home so you can change your clothes and then drive you to school.” I felt the insides of my stomach fill with butterflies. “I mean that’s only if you want to like not like you’re my girlfriend or anything and like I’m not your boyfrie-”

“Uh yeah, Stiles, thanks, that would be very helpful.” I ran to the car, maybe too fast, and Stiles did a u-turn to go back to my house.

____

The car ride was silent, a little uncomfortably so, until Stiles broke it. “Do you want me to turn up the radio?” His voice was a little shaky.

“Yeah sure.” I reply really quickly, making myself cringe.

For the first 30 seconds, it was just talking but then, one of my favourite songs came on: Baby got back by Sir-Mix-A-Lot.

Oh my god Becky, look at her butt

“It is so big!” I yelled but quickly stopped singing as I forgot where I was: In Roscoe, STILES’ JEEP!

“Why did you stop singing?” He chuckled and shot me a smirk.

“Because it’s so embarrassing I know all the words to this song.”

“Please don’t stop singing, I have to hear this now.” He winked at me and every muscle in my body, no matter how tiny, tensed in an effort not to show how much of an effect that wink had on me.

“Okay, if you say so.” A surge of confidence that I had never felt before rushed through me as I not only picked the lyrics back up, but I also turned the music up louder so I could get into the zone. I was either impressing him or just making a complete fool out of myself.

_____

We finally arrived at my house, I opened the door and we walked inside. He was much closer to me than usual. Before I even thought about it, I moved away, feeling uncomfortable.

“Sorry Y/N/N, didn’t mean to do that.”

“No Stiles, don’t be silly, you know me, awkward.”

He chuckled and smiled. “You are so cute like that.”

I flushed a bright pink once again, and so did he. Did he just say I am cute?

I quickly try and brush it off. “Um sorry to be a real pain, but I didn’t get to have a shower, is it okay if I do that?”

“Yeah sure no problem Y/N/N.”

“Cool, well I won’t be long, make yourself at home.”

I quickly ran upstairs to the bathroom.

_____

I didn’t think I had ever had such a quick shower in my life. Stiles Stilinski was at my house. I mean, he had been to my house before, but that was with the pack. I had only been with him when the pack was there, THE PACK WAS NOT THERE, IT WAS JUST ME BY MYSELF WITH MY CRUSH OF TWO YEARS! I wanted to be quick because I was missing out on time with him and secondly, I felt bad for making him wait. I dried myself and wrapped my hair up in my towel, leaving my body naked.

I turned to look in my wardrobe and yelled “Stiles!” to see where he was.

“I’m right here.” He quietly said, and I turned around to see him, creepily sitting on my bed, staring at me, naked, in the nude, WITH NO FUCKING CLOTHES ON! I screamed and quickly grabbed the towel from my head around my bare body.

“Oh my god Y/N I am so sorry I had no idea -”

“No Stiles, it’s fine. I’m stupid I shouldn’t have been walking around the house naked when I knew you were here. My bad, sorry.”

“Why do you always do that?”

“Do what Stiles?”

He proceeded to walk closer to me, barely an inch separating our faces. “Apologise for being yourself. You did it just then, when I accidentally walked too close to you. It’s not your fault.”

We stayed in that moment for what seemed like forever but in reality it was only for a minute.

“Y/N?”

“Yes Stiles?”

“Can I please kiss you?” You never thought those words would come out of his mouth.

“I’ve been waiting two years for that.” I said, not realising how desperate that came off.

“Oh really? Wow okay um, I literally had uh no clue, I mean well yes I did coz Scott kinda told me, and so did Lydia, and Liam, and Kira, Allison, Mason, okay pretty much everyone in the pack told me, um yeah.” Once again, your face flushed with many rosey tones of pink.

“Okay um, so are we gonna kiss?” You said with a low, croaky voice.

“Oh yeah, right. Okay, here we go.” He said.

We both leaned it so we met at 50/50. Our lips glide together in perfect synchronization. He moved his hands to the lowest part of my back, just above my only towel covered ass. I quickly squirmed and pulled away from him.

“Oh my god Y/N did I do something wrong?” The concern coming from his fiery amber eyes made my heart melt.

“No, it’s not you. It’s just, this is so embarrassing. I mean like I’ve had my first kiss and stuff, which was horrible by the way, but like I’ve never really gone past that with anyone and you putting your hands on me it just makes me nervous because no one has really ever done that to me before.”

“Wow Y/N, I never would have guessed that. You are so beautiful and intelligent, any guy would be lucky to have you. I really hope this doesn’t come off insensitive but, does this mean you are a virgin?”

“Yeah, it does.” I felt so embarrassed and stupid about it. Everyone else in the pack had done it, even Liam and he is a freshman.

“No, no, Y/N/N, there is nothing to be embarrassed about. I am too.” As soon as I heard him say that, I pressed my lips down on his.

Our lips once again moulded together making fireworks like the 4th of July erupt inside of me. It was an amazing feeling. A sudden surge of confidence rushed over me and I  broke the kiss and pushed Stiles onto my bed.

“Y/N, what are you doing?” As soon as he finishing talking, I unwrapped the towel, leaving myself  bare, completely exposed. Stiles’ eyes widened as he looked up and down my body. He quickly covered his eyes with his hands. “Oh my god Y/N you lost your towel again.” He shrieked.

“I know.” I moved closer to him and sat on his lap, “I want this Stiles, I think. Not that I know, I haven’t really done this before.”

“Me either Y/N/N, should we just see where this goes?” I nodded and reconnected my lips with his, and I felt those 4th of July fireworks erupting in me once again.

Stiles deepened the kiss by slipping his tongue into my mouth. It just felt so right. He bit my bottom lip and moved down to my neck and began to leave bright purple marks. I had no idea what to do so I put my hands in his hair and pulled, like in the movies. I heard him growl so I stopped. “Oh my god Stiles, did I hurt you?”

“No not at all, that felt really good actually.”

We moved back to the previous position and I moved slightly to maintain my balance.

“Oh my god Y/N please do that again.”

“What like this?” I moved again and realized what I was doing when I begin to feel his bulge grow against me.

I got up and layed down, pressing my back against my bed.

“Okay I have no idea what I’m doing but I’m just gonna go for it.” Stiles looked up at me and a flash of concern ran through his eyes. I gave him a nod of approval and he began to kiss me again. He then proceeded to move further down my body, blowing on the several purple marks he’d left which turned me into a quivering mess.

He reached my breasts and took one in his mouth, sucking roughly while fiddling with the other with his hand. The constant pinching, swirling and tickling caused me to let out a soft moan. He continued to drift further down, kissing my stomach lower and lower until he was just above my core. A weird feeling, like a throbbing began to build in my core.

I was deep in thought when suddenly, I felt a finger on my clit and I bucked my hips at how good it felt. “Wow” I thought to myself, “You are missing out on a lot?” He buried his face in between my thighs, causing me to moan so loud, it echoed through the whole house.

“I don’t ever think I’ve ever heard you be so loud before.” Stiles smirked, which caused me to flush and giggle. As I began to chuckle, Stiles pumped a finger into me.

“Stiles, that feels so good please don’t stop.” I strangled out those words as I felt all the muscles in my body tense up and the pit in my stomach increase.

“Fuck Y/N/N, say my name again that was so hot.”

“Stiles.” I moan as I come undone around his fingers and black spots start to blur my vision as I ride out my high.

Stiles falls down as lies next to me on my bed.

“Wow.” He says with a flabbergasted look in his face.

“That was-”

“Probably not that good.” He interrupts and turns to look at me and begins to play with my hair.

“Are You kidding, that was amazing. I want you to feel what I felt.” I press my lips to his for a quick short peck.

“Are you sure Y/N/N? You don’t have to just because of what I- ooh my god.” His sentence quickly changed into an exclamation as I undid the button on his khakis and pull down his boxers to reveal his massive, veiny cock. My eyes widened at the thought of fitting that whole thing into my mouth, so, I began by pumping his length up and down a few times, causing his head to roll back. Hopefully that meant he liked it.

I finally built up enough courage to put my mouth on his shaft and slowly but surely proceed further and further down and before I knew it, his whole dick was in my mouth. I begin bopping my head down faster and faster repetitively. He moaned my name several times which caused the throbbing sensation in my core rise up again. He started to twitch in my mouth and a salty liquid filled my throat and I swallowed it.

“Y/N/N as if you haven’t done this before, that was so good.” He kissed me, but quickly pulled away and asked, “Oh my god Y/N/N, is my cum still in your mouth?” The roughness of the word made me cringe.

“No Stiles, I swallowed it.”

“Oh my god Y/N/N, I can’t believe you actually swallowed it.”

“WHY ARE YOU NOT SUPPOSED TO AM I GONNA GET SICK?! GREAT HOW WILL EXPLAIN THIS TO MY PARENTS? YEAH MUM, I GOT SICK FROM SUCKING DICK!” Panic starts to fill me and just as I feel an attack come on, Stiles grabs me and pulls me into a hug. He pushes my head into his chest and grips tightly. The panic inside me immediately disappears. I feel so safe in his arms.

“No it’s perfectly normal. Scott says that most girls spit and it’s supposed to be impressive when they swallow. Not really sure why but just thought I’d give you that fact.”

I laughed and pressed my lips to his. It started off nice and slow but quickly turned into an extremely passionate rough kiss. We moved back to my bed again, Stiles lays me down on my back and he hovers over me. He began to lift his shirt up and I helped him. I took in every mole, muscle and area of bare skin on him. My hands roamed around his body as he smiled down at me.

“Y/N, are you sure you want to do this?” He looked up and flashed a look of worry, but it quickly disappeared when I replied. “I’m ready, Stiles.”

He lined his tip up with my entrance and slowly pushed into me until he filled me up all the way with his length. Both of our heads rolled back as he slowly began to pull in and out of me. He started to speed up a little, making me moan softly. I began to kiss him, tongues roaming around everywhere in each others mouths.

“Stiles, I want to try something.” I looked up at him and he had that stupid smirk on his face which I hate, but love at the same time.

“Okay sure.” I rolled us over so he is lying against the bed. I moved down so my legs were on either side of his hips. I lined my entrance up with his tip and slowly moved down onto it, earning a deep, throaty moan from Stiles, which caused me to shiver. I had never heard his voice so deep before, it was so sexy.

“That feels so fucking good Y/N/N, please don’t stop.”

I began to maintain a steady speed, but I couldn’t take it any longer, and by the looks on his face, neither could he. So I began to start moving up and down fast really fast, making myself moan ever louder than before.

“Stiles” I screamed.

“Please scream my name again, I love that.”

“Stiles! Stiles I’m so close to-”

“Me too Y/N/N don’t stop. Keep going.”

I slowly keep increasing my speed and before we know it, we both reach our peak and his liquid fills me. I sloppily fall next to him. I can’t move. I try to get up but I can’t. I freeze. Stiles begins to sit up and sees that I’m frozen.

“Y/N, what’s wrong?”

“I can’t move Stiles, like at all.”

“You are so cute. It’s normal. I think it’s from the fatigue of you know, what we just did, which was amazing by the way.” He began to blush which made me blush too.

“Yeah it was pretty fantastic, hey?” You flashed a smile at Stiles and it made him chuckle.

“So um, I’ll just put some clothes on and we can head to school?”

“Sure Y/N/N, um but before you do that, I just need to know, what are we?” A kaleidoscope of butterflies filled my stomach. I had waited for this moment for so long, I never thought it would actually happen.

“Well what do you want to be Stiles?”

“Y/N/N ever since I laid eyes on you, and I mean like in person not like when I stalked you on social media before you even came to our high school, anyway, I want you to be my girlfriend Y/N/N, will you please be my girlfriend?”

“Stiles Stilinski, you have no idea how long I have waited for you to ask me.”

He responds by pressing his lips to mine. “Let’s get to school.”

___

We finally arrived at school and just as we began walking up the stairs, he grabs my hand and intertwines his fingers with me. We walk through the big glass Beacon Hills high school doors and see the pack staring at us, jaws practically on the floor. We walk over to them.

“Heyy guys.” Scott winks at us.

“Hey Scott.” Stiles and I say in unison and we just laugh at each other, Stiles presses a kiss to my forehead.

“Oh my god, finally!” Lydia exclaims, “I can’t even smell chemosignals but I didn’t even need to it was so obvious and finally! Congrats guys.” Lydia raised an eyebrow and smirked at me. She was my best friend, she knew exactly what happened here.

“Anyways, first period is about to start, Stiles and I have econ so we better get going before coach yells at us. See you guys later. ”Scott beings to walk and so does Stiles, but he quickly tells Scott to wait and he comes back to me and places a quick peck on my lips, then runs back over to Scott.

Nothing else in the world mattered to me at this very moment, I had finally gotten what I wanted, to be with the love of my life, Mieczyslaw Stiles Stilinski and after waiting two agonizing, painful years, I finally got him.

Dare I Say It... (Closed Captions!) I Just Did.

So lately I’ve been seeing a lot of hate or at least negativity towards Captioned videos of any sort. People making posts about “How annoying CC is” “Why does CC exist?” and other remarks. 

This is coming from me, a Deafblind Individual who NEEDS CC to understand speech/video/audio of any sort. This also is on behalf of the Deaf/HOH/ADP/Anyone who needs CC.

You abled, privileged, hearing people have the glorious opportunity, chance of a life time, to watch ANYTHING you want without problems. Without discrimination. Without complaints. Without threats. Without negativity thrown at you. YOU get the privilege of being able to enjoy anything/everything that has spoken language to it.
Us, d/Deaf/HoH/APD/Second Language Need closed captions (CC). NEED accommodation.

Imagine (and I do ask you to TRY IT OUT) you have the TV on mute. Can you understand anything? I doubt it, there’s no sound! You’re trying to make out the characters reactions, movements, behaviour but it’s not working because you can’t tell what’s being said. Then you put CC/Subtitles on. At last! You can FINALLY understand the spoken language! You understand what’s happening!! You’re not lost and tired from trying to play charades. Now you can enjoy the show without complaints!

Another Try It Out put earplugs in and walk around all day or at least a few hours with those earplugs. Can you understand speech? Can you figure out where things are coming from? No? Everything is muffled sounding yes? As if you’re in a tunnel? 

This is how many d/Deaf/HoH/APD people feel each and every single day Speech is muffled sounding, distorted, garble nonsense. It’s tiring to constantly lipread (Which isn’t 30% accurate for English language seen on lips), trying to understand what someone is saying when it’s all so muffled!

Now, you go to entirely new country, with only said language as your SECOND language which you aren’t entirely fluent in yet. Even if you are… understanding the second language is fairly hard yes? Everything all muffled and “Blah blah blah” sounding correct? Putting subtitles on can make a HUGE difference! Yes the country’s language can be spoken, but having YOUR language on subtitles can be beneficial for you. You aren’t lost. You aren’t confused. You understand what everyone is laughing about in the movie because you have subtitles!

Gifs/Moving images: people uploads these on tumblr, facebook, other media sites. They have captions on them because people wouldn’t know what is being said. Imagine the subtitles/captions, gone. I doubt you’d have any idea what is happening and what particular scene the gif/moving image is from. Here’s the thing, people don’t complain about gifsets being made that have subtitles/closed captions on it so EVERYONE can see whats happening….  Yet people complain that there’s (OMG!) Subtitles/Captions on VIDEOS?!?! A TEXT POST UNDERNEATH A VIDEO THAT HAS (Dare I say it?) CAPTIONS! HOW UNCALLED FOR! 

Did you know that Captions can be extremely useful? 
Check these links out explaining why. 

Perks of Having Closed Captions (CC)

Stop Making Excuses And CC Your Videos

How To Closed Caption Your Videos 

Closed Captions (CC)

rikkipoynter did a video on WHY CC is important 

tyleroakley followed up with that and gave reasons why CC is important (Hear Me Out)

paulidin did a video on why Access Matters! Closed Captions

my good friend timelordonbakerstreet shows you HOW to CC your videos

captioned-vines, captioningresource, waitwhatdidtheysay and others do a wonderful job captioning the videos. 

Captions are IMPORTANT. If you add captions, you get more respect. When you add captions you don’t get complaints, you get more views/followers/people who will enjoy your videos. When you add captions you can enjoy watching shows on mute while at work, in line, anywhere. 

If you don’t like Captions… there’s one Simple Thing To Do TURN THEM OFF WHEN PEOPLE WHO NEED THEM… Leave. Don’t make a HUGE DEAL!1!111 about CC. If the CC benefit the person, then be accommodative, not an asshole, and let the CC be on. Would you rather us ask you 20 questions in 5 minutes asking “What they say? What? Whats so funny? Huh? I missed that! Again?” Doubt it. So put CC on. It isn’t that difficult.

When you see transcript/cc underneath a video…. Please DO NOT delete the CC. All you need to do is go to SOURCE’s page and Reblog from there. It isn’t that difficult. 

JUST BE RESPECTFUL because you won’t know who you have hurt/make someone feel upset. You’re unintentionally discriminating and be disrespectful to those who need CC/subtitles. 

7

The Reboot Crew + Social Media

Nobody thought there was a Facebook equivalent of MySpace famous until Jim made an account.

After everyone’s urging, Spock finally got a snapchat. His current score is 2.

Ridiculous photogenicness run in the McCoy family. Bones gets a lot of private messages from child modeling agencies and single gay men.

Sulu has no idea how he got so many subscribers, but his videos have maintained the constant theme of “I hate my fucking life but space is awesome and so is the cute navigator.”

Uhura may act tough and cold, but her tumblr is just a blog full of pretty things.

Pavel’s cute accent and silly antics made him rise to fame quickly on Vine. The occasional cameo by his hot pilot boyfriend also tends to draw viewers.

All Scotty wanted to do was have a little drunk fun and let the world know all of his useless opinions on everything. The world found his useless opinions hilarious, his podcasts topping iTunes downloads, and his twitter blowing up as soon as it was made.

amarynthian-fortress  asked:

Good evening, dearie, what's up in the kingdom? :3 Credence heard rumours that Gellert secretly has a Hello Kitty plushie hidden underneath his robes, Graves is spreading the gossip on all wizarding social media. Albus made a tweet saying that it is most definitely not Hello Kitty, but it's a singing Elsa doll.

( Oooh I was just writing a little more for the kingdom and things aren’t looking good from my side. What you say here is certainly more sweeter :))) )

Graves can’t help but giggle because for once Gellert is not the one that causes trouble but he heard rumors around the kingdom about the plush. He wants everyone to know and posts on Facebook some photoshopped pictures of Earl Grindelwald sleeping with plush kittens and the Earl cannot stand nor does he know why everyone is giggly around him as he flutters his cape furiously strolling down the hall when Prince Credence rushed down the hall t show him Albus’s tween and he grows pale(er) and nearly faints. 
Credence scoots swiftly and hides under Lord Graves bed but falls asleep and in the middle of the night he wakes up and curls into bed shyly with Lord Graves, wrapping his arms around him and Graves smiles softly in his sleep because he know it’s him.

ok so staying away from facebook has made me reconsider what it is to me and made me realise that it makes you believe you are on top of everything and that you belong and you know what is going on with everyone. you know what and where they ate or when they’re planning on going on a trip and it gives this illusion of just fake closeness like you are part of each other’s lives but not really?

for me it is a place where i show an edited version of myself to people i know in real life. i have different versions of myself - myself anonymous online, myself on facebook, myself with my family, myself with different sets of friends - i act differently and i guess it stems from the fact that my experiences has taught me how easily it is to cut someone from your life so whenever i meet someone new, i step back, evaluate what they can give and offer only the same in return. i have friends only for telling funny stories, friends only for discussing books, etc. and this is in real life. in facebook i post my thoughts, my content, my life but only things i want to show them, heavily edited and without realising it, it’s become a vessel for me to show the world i still exist. i have likes and dislikes and opinions and rants and i am here. if i don’t go on facebook, do they still know i exist? and if they don’t, do i really?

deactivating my facebook has made me realise how much time i spend on that godawful site and how people show the best of themselves there which makes other people feel like they are not accomplishing as much or living their life right and it’s depressing AF. i’ve seen people get strength from facebook like literally get strength to go through a breakup by posting on facebook and there’s nothing wrong with it do what you gotta do but at the same time it makes me so sad? it’s a website but validation from people on it gets you through the day (and in a way tumblr is the same too but it’s also different for me since here it’s anonymous and on facebook it’s people irl) i admit i’ve also felt that way and i guess when you’re absent-mindedly scrolling through an app you don’t figure it out but now that i don’t have anything to do with my phone, i think about it all the time

Major Crimes Fanfic masterpost

Okay, so I realized I’ve written something like 60 Major Crimes fics since the show started. Most of them have been posted on FFN.

Since many people in the fandom come and go, I thought I’d make a list of all my Major Crimes fics for anyone who might be interested in reading. I am going to list even the ones that are not really good (but I promise to warn you in advance). I will post them according to pairing. Whenever applicable, I will state the relevant season.

Shandy fics:

  • The Sounds of Happiness - Season 4. The explanation behind Andy’s bruise in the winter episodes promo pic. Includes Mother!ship. 
  • Romantic - Season 4. Sharon and Andy spend an unforgettable evening together. Recommended.
  • The Morning After - Season 4. Oneshot. Andy watches Sharon sleep.
  • Fixing Hearts - AU Major Crimes/Grey’s Anatomy crossover. Dr. Flynn meets Dr. Dixon and wants to get to know her better.  Recommended.
  • One Day At A Time - Season 4. Sharon is worried about Andy’s addiction. Episode tag to 4x06.
  • Copy-lating - Season 4-ish. Crack!fic. Taylor finds an incriminating evidence of inappropriate behavior in his Xerox machine and suspects someone from the Major Crimes Division. Recommended.
  • Come Rain or Shine - Season 4. Episode tag to 4x02. Sharon needs Andy to comfort her.
  • What She Needs Him For - Season 4. Episode tag to 4x01. Sharon and Andy’s talk takes a very different form than what Sharon had expected.
  • Puppy Love -  Sharon has a very disturbing night.
  • Für Elise - Sharon and Andy are spending a quiet evening with Gavin and his life partner. The situation becomes emotional when Gavin asks Sharon to play them her favorite musical piece.
  • Trust and Reprisal - Andy gets jealous when Sharon goes out to a dinner with her first boyfriend. 
  • The Bright Side -  An unfortunate incident forces Sharon to make a life changing decision.
  • Sensations - Multi-chapter smut. Sharon and Andy take a few sex advices from a book.
  • Not Running Away - Season 3. An episode tag to 3.19 “Special Master”. What went through Sharon’s head when Andy touched her shoulder?
  • Closest To Your Heart - M rated. Sharon and Andy are basking in the afterglow. 
  • I Never Dreamed Someone Like You (Could Love Someone Like Me) -  Sharon and Andy have an honest conversation and address fears and expectations. 
  • A Twist In My Sobriety - Season 3. Sharon serves as Andy’s buffer at an unusual family gathering.
  • Angels We Have Heard On High - Season 3. Episode tag to 3x15. A missing scene in which Andy gives Sharon a Christmas gift.
  • Something To Look Forward To -  Season 3. Episode tag to 3x13. A few days after The Nutcracker, Sharon and Andy have an important conversation and a dinner that will determine their future.
  • Chocolate Kisses - A kiss…
  • Toy Story - Shameless smut. Sharon and Andy try some sex toys.
  • Free - AU. Sharon deals with an unexpected event that changes the way she defines herself. Andy is there to guide her in the right direction.
  • Dinners and Stuff - Inspired by a Tony Denison interview before season 3 began. Sharon and Andy go on a series of dinners… and stuff. 
  • Wouldn’t It Be Nice? - AU. Andy is planning to propose. 
  • Midnight Brooding - M rated. Sharon can’t sleep after her first time with Andy. 
  • Reunion - M rated. Sharon and Andy are invited to a reunion of their Police Academy class, but things don’t go as planned.
  • Intervention - Andy gives Sharon advice about Jack’s gambling habit. 
  • Happy New Dream - New Year’s Eve fic.
  • The Gift - Season 2. Andy and Rusty discuss a Christmas gift for Sharon.
  • Peace & Love - The story behind Sharon’s secret tattoo.
  • Unchained Melody - Christmas/ New Year’s Eve story. 
  • A Married Woman - Season 2. Drabble. Andy’s thoughts after the wedding.
  • His Friend Sharon  - Season 2. Sharon accompanies Andy to Nicole’s wedding. 
  • Happy End - Smutty fun at the beach.
  • Staying Alive - Rusty and Andy comfort Sharon after nearly beind shot.
  • Damsel In Distress - AU. Takes place before The Closer. Sharon and Andy hook up during her FID days. Warning: I received a lot of negative comments about this one. While I understand why some people see this fic as problematic, I would like to explain that this story takes place during a timeframe when Andy was considered a chauvinistic prick and before he has developed respect for Sharon. Keep that in mind while reading this.
  • Captain Captain - Smut. Sharon and Andy play cop and suspect. 
  • Stuck Together - M rated. Multichapter. Sharon runs into a series of unfortunate events in her life, which changes her relationship with Andy. Trigger warning for sexual assault. Not one of my recommended stories. 

Mother!ship fics:

  • Freaked Out -  Based on one of the season 4 promos. Rusty gives Sharon several reaosns to freak out.
  • Heros Never Sleep - After a very stressful day at work, Sharon receives a letter that changes her mood. 
  • Spring Affair - Rusty reflects on some strange new behaviors and habits Sharon has recently developed and reaches one important conclusion (+Shandy). 
  • The Things That Make A Family - Fluffy adopt-a-pet fic.
  • Becoming A Family - A compilation of mini-fics written for prompts given to me on Tumblr and Facebook during the hiatus. I arranged them in an order that made sense, even though technically, they are not related, they are all about the stages of becoming a family (+Shandy). 
  • The Way Back Home - A tragic event from Sharon’s past resurfaces when she and Rusty are cleaning her parents’ attic. Together, they have to deal with the people in their lives who abandoned them. Read trigger warning.
  • Under The Stars - Season 3. Rusty and Sharon go camping. 
  • When Life Gives You Onions - Sharon receives a bouquet that makes her overly emotional and Rusty steps in to help her.
  • Fix You - Season 2. Episode tag to 2x19. Sharon and Rusty have a much needed talk. 
  • Famous Last Words - Angst. Major Character death.  Sometimes it’s better late than never. Sometimes it’s just too late and the opportunity is missed.
  • Life is Full of Surprises - Season 2. On the evening of The Nutcracker, Rusty and Sharon come to an important conclusion (+Shandy).
  • Ecliptic Creatures - Season 2. Rusty learns an unexpected lesson in life. 
  • Suitcase Full of Memories - Season 2. Following the mid-season finale, Rusty is removed from Sharon’s home. The squad is saying goodbye to him. 
  • Strings & Pins - Season 2. An unsuccessful attempt at a crack!fic. Rusty is trying to channel his anger into his art project. 
  • God Works in Mysterious Ways - A discovery in the back of Rusty’s closet helps him and Sharon get a better understanding of life. 
  • Go Veggie - Crack!fic. Rusty has a good reason to clean Sharon’s fridge…  
  • Family Matters - Season 1. After hearing that Rusty is living with Sharon, her mother and ex-husband come to LA. Their visit forces Sharon to deal with some painful truths and events from her past.

Sharon/Jack fics:

  • What You Left Behind - Jack is saying goodbye to his family, only moments before he leaves for his first rehab.
  • Wedding Vows -  Sharon tried to be a good wife and follow her wedding vows.

Sharon/Other and original Characters: 

  • Someone Else - Season 3. M rated. Episode tag to 3x03. Sharon/OC. Sharon takes an evening off from being herself and assumes an alias that leads to an unexpected turn of events.
  • Trick Or Treat - Smut. Sharon has her own original idea of how trick and treating should happen, especially where a certain Agent Fritz Howard of the FBI is concerned.
  • Dreams & Bath - Sharon/Andrea. Andrea has something important she needs and wants to tell Sharon, but things don’t go as planned.
  • 2011 Sauvignon Blanc - Sharon/Brenda. Smut. After Brenda’s testimony in Phillip Stroh’s trial, Sharon and Brenda discover that there is more than one way to share a bottle of wine.  
  • Living People Do - Season 2. Smut. Episode tag to 2x17. Sharon/Emma.  Loneliness brings Sharon and Emma together for one night, but things spin out of control. 

Multi-ship/General fics:

  • Friendly Advice - Season 4. Episode tag to 4x03. As they sit for a coffee after their meeting with Hobbs and Rusty, Judge Grove gives Sharon yet another advice (+Shandy).
  • Fairytale Ending - Sharon/Andy + Provenza/Hobbs. Provenza and Hobbs interfere with Sharon and Andy’s relationship. 
  • Pride In Unit - Season 3.  Sharon has an unusual request for the squad.
  • Sex With The Ex - M rated. Sharon/husband (before we knew his name) + Sharon/Andy. A very complicated story that I can’t describe or finish. Bottom line - don’t read anything past Chapter 2.
  • Wicked Witch - The story of how Sharon originally became known as the Wicked Witch. Goes way before her LAPD days. 
  • A Place For Wendy - Sharon/Andy + Rusty/OFC. Sharon takes in Rusty’s baby sister.    

Emily and Ricky fics:

  • Buzzing Romance - Emily/Buzz. Emily is into Buzz, but he wants her to make sure her mother is okay with their relationship. 
  • The One - Emily/OC + Sharon/Andy. A marriage proposal goes wrong. Sharon tries to help resolving the awry situation.
  • Perfect Family -  6 years old Ricky keeps some terrible secrets from his mother.
Hackers Get Hacked: Elliot x Reader

Request: Hi! Could you maybe do an Elliot/Reader fic where the reader’s like the child of the owner of Ecorp and she went with the ecorp team to allsafe, you know during the scene in the first ep… And Elliot kinda found her interesting and he hacks her but he doesn’t know that she’s as techy as he was and he/she found out so she kinda leaves him little clues like changing her password into something like ‘stophackingme’ or something and they just kinda became friends with eachs other thru that…

Word count: 1, 305

You sighed as you followed your dad into the building. He opened the glass door and walked into, what seemed like an office, but with several cubicles placed next to each other. You let your eyes roam over all the cubicles, often letting your eyes linger at an particular person. You asked your dad if you could join him at work for a few days, so you could get some work experience. He was less excited than you thought, but he let you shadow him for two days. You didn’t expect to make a trip to his cyber security company, and also join him for a meeting there.

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