Does anybody ever wonder why there’s flavored condoms? Or is that just me? Also, I saw the other day this like penis extender that the end part had a light up LED thing…. now why is that necessary? Are you trying to have a rave in the person’s vagina or what? I’m so confused.
I think I’m on one of those lucky streaks for sure. Woke up, managed to get everything packed up and here on time. My flight was early, and to top it off. I get here and in the fridge I found celery and peanut butter. Today was a good ass day. So, anyways…Hi, I’m here!
Y’know, as exciting as being here is – something tells me that m’gonna be spending most of my time in the bar, maybe. Oi! Is there even a bar here, hm? ‘cause I’m kiiiinda already wanting something strong, don’t you go and break my heart by telling me there isn’t one.
Maybe it’s a brit thing but lately I’ve been watching Premier League like I’m an actual hooligan or something– which is weird ‘cause I don’t know jack about it so I’m just yelling random rubbish at me telly. Anyway, ciao I’m Perrie and I pretend to like footie.
So, my play went well for it’s opening weekend. It just sucks I wasn’t there to see it happen. But my assistant director, Trish, assured me that everything was handled and under control. I love my cast and crew so much. I guess I can relax now…What can we do on this boat?
I’m pretty sure someone is playing a prank on me because ever since we arrived a couple of days ago someone has been leaving various sex toys outside my door. I am sorry to disappoint you but I don’t need those. So if they are yours you can come and pick them up.