guys this family is so great

recent netflix show recommendations:

in order of how recently i’ve watched it:

  • Mindhunter 
    • I WATCHED ALL 10 EPISODES IN ONE GO, IT’S SO GOOD AND ADDICTING. ACTING IS SUPERB, ESPECIALLY THE CRIMINALS JFC im not kidding fam this is a Golden show
  • This Is Us 
    • there’s a reason why this show has so many emmy wins and nominations 
    • i cried like a little bitch in 80% of the episodes
    • such a heartwarming show that highlights the fragility of family bonds
  • Rupauls Drag Race
    • netflix canada got rid of seasons 1-7 and there’s only season 8 up right now which is annoying cause they’re ALL SO GREAT. 
    • all the drag queens on the show are amazing, talented, dramatic af and hilarious
  • Ozark
    • saw this for jason bateman. love that man
    • really dark at times but also very entertaining

any other new shows you guys recommend? 

anonymous asked:

Hey guys! So I'm transmasculine and I recently ordered a transgender flag and a trans enamel pin which both arrived today! I'm only waiting for my new GC2B binder to arrive and then I will take some nice pics and use them to make a coming out post on facebook! I basically have everyone I know in real life on there, except for most of my extended family. But yeah, I'm proud of who I am and don't wanna hide anymore and everyone who doesn't support it can fuck off

Ah that’s so great that you’re being so brave with this, best of luck with your coming out! We’re proud of you :) -Alex

anonymous asked:

I’m so glad you finally got that kid out. But honestly congratulations! I’m so happy for you and Alex. Your family has a lot of love and I’m sure you guys will do a great job raising Dorian.

I’m glad I finally got him out! By the end I was aching so much! And 15 hours of labour - URGH! I was kind of thankful for the c-section being necessary by the end.

You know what i really love about Louise from Bob’s Burgers? Despite being the “evil mastermind” she’s still just a little girl. She still gets crushes on boy band members, and she still wears dresses, and she still loves her stuffed animals and has a favourite toy, which she’s named. She does voices for them too, she hates taking medicine, and above all she loves her family. She’s just a little kid and her mischievous abilities never undermine that, and I think it’s just really awesome. Kudos to the writers for making her so real

5

Anon, I wanna thank you cause I agree with like all of this!!! 

In fact here’s a good list to expand on more of this:

( Train AU Beginnings )

The Train AU takes place in a town much like the ones you would find in southern Ireland. I have family over there and the scenery is so beautiful, the train rides I took to visit all my cousins were some of the most peaceful trips I’ve had. I want you guys to imagine a place with wide open fields and close-knit neighbors. But also cobblestoned city streets with more places to walk than drive. I want you guys to picture warm nature and stone fences. 

Altea Academy is a private institution located in the modern downtown district of Finch (a made up town based on Dublin). The high school caters to talented and wealthy students and offers them a college preparatory education. Most of its students are child prodigies and scholarshiped athletes. The school itself is very reminiscent of Trinity University in Dublin. Due to its prominent nature, the school is known for being uptight, but its students are known for being quite troublesome. But since their students are regarded as the “best” the school rarely punishes them. If they did the child’s important angry parents would be breathing down the principal’s neck. The school’s football team is known locally and statewide, they have always dominated the competition.

Students of Altea:

  • Takashi Shirogane - Team captain and quarterback of Altea’s Black Lions. Shiro is seen by teachers as a straight-A senior and perfect student. But his friends and fellow students see him as tired soul. He stays up late to do homework and runs on nothing but willpower and energy drinks. He is constantly making bad decisions when his friends are not with him. Bad decisions include: Random piercings his current hairstyle, and regrettable tattoos. He is a huge space nut and can talk to you all day about the stars, their constellations, and their meanings. His affinity for stars has earned him the nickname Space Dad. He’s an Instagram legend thanks to his friend Matt and is sought after by every guy and girl in the district. 
  • Katie Holt - A computer science prodigy, Katie was able to skip three grades and at age 14 she sits with her brother in the senior class. Due to the strict dress code, Katie was forbidden from wearing the men’s uniform and is constantly writing emails to the faculty about how unfair it is to deny her pants. She may look like she is diligently typing notes but Katie sits in the back of the class for a reason. She’s either hacking the school’s internet and database or playing video games, yet whenever called she can answer the question correctly. Unlike Shiro, the school knows Katie is not as sweet as she looks. Along with her brother, Keith, and secretly Shiro, she has pulled off countless school pranks. 
  • Matt Holt - An angel in the eyes of teachers and best friends with Shiro. He pretends to scold his sister for her troublesome pranks when called to the office, but it’s all an act. Computer science and mathematics prodigy Matthew Holt is the face of several school adds along with Shiro. Due to his father’s strong government ties, the school can hardly punish his sister and thus could never touch him. Matt is Shiro’s lifeline making sure he studies, supplies him with Monster, and treats him to breakfast every once in a while. 
  • Keith Kogane - A reckless punk in the eyes of teachers and staff. But a school icon none the less. No matter how many classes he sleeps through he always aces them. He’s on the football team with Shiro and has scored most of the school record-breaking touchdowns. He’s a golden boy at everything and anything and the teachers can’t do anything about his reckless behavior without incurring the wrath of his uncle, CEO of Galra Industries and Sciences, Zarkon. Keith’s parents died when he was very young. His mother’s brother took him in and raised him alongside his own son Lotor. He loves Keith like his own son and bought him the house his parent’s lived in on the outskirts of the quiet town of Creek.

(Lotor goes to another elite high school in Finch where the football team is co-ed. Lotor is the quarterback and captain and the girls he leads are hella strong. Their team is usually ranked third in the district and is constantly trying to one-up Altea. )


West Creek High is a local high school in the much calmer town of Creek, about a four-hour train ride from Finch. The school itself is a community high school, lots of local kids go here. It’s an old building with laxed old rules, and well-behaved students. The school’s pride is its football team, most kids go to West Creek just to make the team. They are ranked second in the county. In Creek, the streets are more for walking and less for driving. There is a local Somoan bakery that makes fresh pastries every morning and next to them is a cafe. The owners are good friends and together bring in business for both shops. 

Students of West Creek High

  • Hunk Garret- A lovable sweet boy with a heart of gold and the body of a god. Hunk is the school’s famed linebacker, he’s a hulking beast on the field and could break a normal high schooler in two. But Hunk couldn’t hurt a fly and only joined the team for the scholarship so he could save his mother money. He helps run the local Somoan bakery with her and is looking to take over the business when he graduates. He’s best friends with Lance and has been since pre K. They have matching wristbands, the one Hunk wears is Lance’s favorite color while the one Lance wears is Hunk’s favorite color. Sometimes he and Lance stay up hella late playing video games with their online friend Pidge. 
  • Allura - The resident hottest girl in school, Allura is rather down to earth and sweet once people get to know her. She runs a fashion blog and dominates Instagram with gorgeous selfies. Although her father is the CO-CEO to Galra, and she could have gone to any school she wanted, she chose West Creek out of all the fancy prep schools. She thought the homier the neighborhood the kinder the friends. She became friends with Hunk and Lance because she frequently eats at Hunk’ s bakery. Lance is her wingman and always lets her know if a guy at a party is trouble. She currently has a crush on this guy who keeps showing up on her insta feed.He’s got a fringe of bleached hair and piercings. His friend’s feed is filled with pictures of the said bleached boy doing hilarious stunts and sweaty football pics. It’s a blessing. 
  • Coran Smythe - Is the schools most eccentric and loved history professor. He somehow has a strange unheard historical fact for every era they cover in class and often judges the textbooks on getting certain events wrong or the author being completely off base. Not only is he a great teacher but he is also a great coach. He coaches the Creek Creatures football team. The mascot is some kind of cryptid, the current costume resembles Mothman.  
  • Lance Sanchez - A straight-A student and all around excitable guy. He wants to be an astronaut, or a fighter pilot, or something to do with the sky. Lance loves the idea of flying and wants to get his piloting license when he graduates. Lance lives on the outskirts of Creek where his family owns a farm with horses, cows, and lots or sheep. So his mom makes him take the train to make sure he gets to school on time. He’s always been a little bit of a daydreamer and is often caught zoning out in class.

The train ride from Creek to Finch is an hour and a half, the train consists of mostly leisure cars where you can sit at a table and be treated to a snack trolley. Otherwise, you can sit in the many standing cars with minimal seating and more standing room. 

2

So a friend of mine in instagram and I were having this conversation of how the vAs are so precious and a gift to us fans so here’s a little tribute for them. Keep up the great work and we will always support and love you guys~ 😘

Bojack Horseman

what I expected: look at this funny cartoon where some people are animals! look, this guy is a dog and sometimes he does dog stuff isn’t that great?


what I got: depression is complex and difficult to understand and it affects everyone for different reasons and in different ways. the way we choose to deal with the thoughts and feelings it causes affects not only us but everyone we meet in our daily lives; our unhealthy coping mechanisms hurt us but they also hurt our friends and family in ways that aren’t always obvious

My grandmother got very very sick when I was making the record, which is what Supermarket Flowers is about if anyone’s heard that song. And my brother is a classical film composer, so he makes classical music. I make pop music. And we don’t really, like… he’s my brother, and I love him, but we don’t - I don’t understand classical music and he doesn’t really understand pop music. So we don’t have, like… When we meet up, we just talk about like Family Guy and Rick and Morty and stuff like that, and it’s not really, like that’s kind of it. But she said, she said, before she died she wanted to see her two – she’s only got two grandsons; it’s only me and my brother – she said before she died she wanted to see her two grandsons work together. And I said, ‘Well Matt, I’ve got–’ Matt’s my brother, and I said, 'Matt, I’ve got this song that I think an orchestra could be great.’ And he orchestrated a 60-piece orchestra for this song, Perfect, and we recorded a 60-piece orchestra at Abbey Road Studios. And managed to get it done before our grandmother passed away. And it was one of those moments where we sort of brought a laptop into the hospital room and played her it, and we were both kinda like, YEAH, we did it! It was just a really really special moment and to be able to have that now, being played on radio, and having the whole world hear something that me and my brother made, is like, is really cool. So I would like to sing this tonight. I would like to dedicate it to every single person in the crowd that has lost a loved one, has found a loved one, anyone that is in love, feels love, this is all for you.
—  Ed Sheeran introducing Perfect in Boston, September 22, 2017. [x]
French Movies

Hey guys! Movies helped me a lot to improve my French. I love French movies and French cinema and now I wanna share a few of my favorite movies and must-sees with you! I hope they’ll help you!

  • La peau douce (a bit older, about a man who has an affair with a young girl, black&white, a bit dramatic)
  • La vie d’Adèle (LESBIANS!)
  • Sur mes lèvres (a very nice thriller about a deaf girl and a criminal)
  • Dans la maison (a high school student writes stories about the mother of his buddy and it escalates)
  • 8 femmes (lesbians, bisexuals, drama, a dead man, nice clothes, takes place in the 50ies)
  • Swimming Pool (you see boobs sometimes, a British writer spends a few days in the South of France and writes about mysterious things that happen there)
  • Sagan (a biopic about Françoise Sagan, dramatic and a bit gay)
  • Le placard (a guy pretends to be gay so he doesn’t lose his job)
  • Poltergay (gay disco ghosts from the 70ies mess up a man’s life and relationship)
  • Une nouvelle amie (great movie about a trans woman)
  • Le fabuleux destin d’Amélie Poulain (y’all know this one)
  • Belles familles (family drama about a house and feelings, a man falls for his very young step sister)
  • La femme d’à côté (a man discovers that his new neighbour is his ex girlfriend, a lot of amour fou, sad film, dramatic)
  • Le dernier Métro (a Jewish theater director hides in his theater and his wife falls for an actor, during WW2, nice clothes, 2 gay characters (not main characters but still…))
  • L’enfer (1994 version) (a jealous man turns his wife’s life into a real nightmare, very interesting film)
  • L’homme qu’on aimait trop (based on a true story, takes place in Nice, crime, mystery)
  • Lila dit ça (drama, 2 teenagers living in Marseille, sad love story, a bit nsfw, about a writer)
  • La belle saison (Lesbians in the 70ies, unshaved arm pits for the win, cute yet sad, takes place on a farm)
  • Rien à déclarer (a very funny film about French and Belgian ppl and stereotypes)
  • Bienvenue chez les Ch’tis (y’all should know this one!!! a classic! watch it with French subtitles!!!!)
  • Persepolis (animation film, an Iranian girl tells us about her life in Iran, France and Austria, very moving, based on real events)
  • Les innocents aux mains sales (older movie, with Romy Schneider!! a woman kills her husband but he’s not as dead as she thinks he is)
  • A la folie… pas du tout! (You think this is a cute romatic lil film? you are SO wrong!!)
  • Les intouchables (y’all know that one I guess)
random life tips

hello everyone!! since I’m not a pro at studying (I just do my best) I thought I would share with you some of my go-to tips to have a better day/week/month/life 😊

  • wake up early!! this may seem typical but I used to sleep in a lot and when I started waking up earlier I noticed a big change.
  • clean your face daily! every morning and night clean your face and moisturize. just create a skincare routine and stick to it! also, use a day per week when you have time to relax and put some masks and exfoliate your face and body.
  • this may seem stupid but dress clothes you like and put on some makeup! but most important when you feel like this is not your day. when we’re feeling bad or a little sad we usually throw on some sweatpants & a sweatshirt and don’t use make up and even though it may seem stupid, if you push yourself to wear your favorite outfit or put a little bit of makeup you will see yourself looking better and this will make you feel better during the day (I promise)!!!
  • eat breakfast! brain food guys!!! this is the most important meal of the day. as a Spanish phrase used A LOT by my mom says “eat breakfast like a king, have lunch like a prince and have dinner like a poor man” (desayuna como un rey, come como un príncipe y cena como un mendigo).
  • make to-do lists: yeah, make to-do list for everything you need them! this will help you to do everything you must do without leaving any task (which would happen to me when I didn’t write out what I needed to do)
  • shower every night! okay if you prefer taking a shower in the morning is up to you but showering at night relaxes you and helps you sleep better
  • talk to people everyday (even if it’s your parents) you need to talk guys and tell someone how you feel and what happened during the day (those days I don’t talk to my friends/family I feel super sad and I don’t know why?)
  • listen to music that makes you feel alive!! I have this playlist where I put every song that makes me feel something. I think music is so powerful and can help you change your mood in a few secs
  • go out to nature! since I live in a city it feels super great when I get to spend some time out in the woods or the beach – go running, swim, take a walk or just sit, breath fresh air and enjoy!
  • dance, dance, danceeeeeee!!! hahah it doesn’t matter if your dance moves are worse than a potato but dance, jump and let go!
  • treat yourself with your favorite meal every now and then. I love eating so whenever I get to eat my favorite food it’s a happy day for me hahah :’-)
  • talk to your reflection in the mirror. tell yourself how great is your hair today, how glowy is your skin and how beautiful are you! do it every day, it’ll help 😊
  • sleep enough hours! when I don’t sleep a healthy amount of hours I feel super tired and I get angry super easily, so sleep well and wake up to a beautiful day!
  • journal and write daily or when you feel like you need to! write what you feel, what happened in that day, write your goals, quotes to summarize the day, the dreams you had last night… I don’t know! just let your mind go and write and/or doodle I promise this helps :-) 

well I hope this helped at least some of you!! thank you if you’ve read this!! xx

It pisses me off so much that countless people are going to see BATB and then returning and going ‘uwu all those hateful angry gays were wrong!! le fou was so great!!’ like

1) even if, magically, le fou was a fantastic character and fantastic rep, it doesn’t change the fact that people ABSOLUTELY can be wary of Disney fucking up yet another thing

and 2) le fou’s gayness was a joke when it was explicit, but he still wasn’t allowed to be truly gay - I went with my straight family and they all missed EVERYTHING. he dances with a transmisogynistic joke guy at the end of the movie for like four seconds - ACCIDENTALLY - his affection/care for gaston is a joke when gaston isn’t manipulating him with it, and the funny gay sidekick desperately in love with a mean straight guy isn’t… good rep at all

finally 3) gay actors being in the movie means shit if they’re playing straights, especially when the gay character is a joke and there’s an awful transmisogynistic joke

all of y'all can shut up

How to Write Successful Dialogue

@albino-troll-ninja asked:

Got any feedback/advice/links for someone who wants to make lengthy, relatively action-less dialogues between characters more than just “‘Loren ipsum,’ he said.” “'Ipsum lorem’, she replied.” for forty paragraphs?

No problem!  I love dialogue, so I’m happy to be of assistance in this department.  

Here are my personal rules of thumb:

1.  Allow the dialogue to show the character’s personality.

If you really think about your conversations, it can be telling exactly how much of someone’s personality can shine through when they speak.  

Allow your character’s persona, values, and disposition to spill over when they speak, and it will make for a significantly more interesting read for you and your reader. 

For example:  let’s take a look at a mundane exchange, and see how it can be spruced up by injecting it with a good dose of personality.

Exhibit A)

“How was your day, by the way?”  asked Oscar, pouring himself a drink.

“Not too bad,” replied Byron.  “Cloudy, but warm.  Not too many people.”

“That’s nice.”   

Exhibit B) 

“How was your day, by the way?” asked Oscar, pouring himself a drink. 

“Ugh.  Not too bad,” groaned Byron, draping himself on the couch.  “Warm, but dreary.  Gray clouds as far as the eye could see.  Not anyone worth mentioning out this time of year.”  A pause.  “Well, except me, of course.”

“Hmmph,” said Oscar, glancing over his shoulder.  “If it were me, I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

Isn’t that better?  Already, the audience will feel as though they’ve gotten to know these characters. 

This works for longer dialogue, too:  allow the character’s personal beliefs, life philosophy, and generally disposition to dictate how they talk, and your readers will thank you.

Of course, this example is also good for giving the reader a general sense of what the characters’ relationship is like.  Which brings me to my next point:

2.  Allow the dialogue to show the character’s relationship. 

Everyone is a slightly different person depending on who they’re around.  Dynamic is an important thing to master, and when you nail it between two characters, sparks can fly.

Work out which character assumes more of the Straight Man role, and which is quicker to go for lowbrow humor.  Think of who’s the more analytical of the two and who’s the more impulse driven.  Who would be the “bad cop” if the situation called for it.  

Then, allow for this to show in your dialogue, and it will immediately become infinitely more entertaining.

Example:  

“Alright,” said Fogg, examining the map before him.  “Thus far, we’ve worked out how we’re going to get in through the ventilation system, and meet up in the office above the volt.  Then, we’re cleared to start drilling.”

Passepartout grinned.  “That’s what she said.” 

“Oh, for the love of God – REALLY, Jean.  Really!?  We are PLANNING a goddamn bank robbery!”

Some more questions about dynamic to ask yourself before writing dialogue: 

  • Who is more likely to talk and who is more likely to listen? 
  • Who would talk with their mouth full of food and who would politely wait to swallow?
  • Is their relationship fraternal/sororal?  If so, who would be the “little sibling?”
  • Is one of them a bit of a mother/father figure to the other? 
  • Who more frequently gets irritated with who?
  • Who has the more understated sense of humor?  Who’s a bit more juvenile?
  • Who’s better educated?  Does it show when they speak?
  • Who’s a bit more pretentious/full of themselves?
  • Who interrupts more?
  • Who swears more?

This can also be a valuable tool to cluing your reader in on who the characters are as people: 

3.  Think about what this dialogue can tell the reader.

It’s better to fill the reader in more gradually than to waist your valuable first chapter on needless exposition, and dialogue is a great way to do it.  

Think about what your characters are saying, and think about ways in which you can “sneak in” details about their past, their families, and where they came from into the discussion.  

For example, you could say:

Tuckerfield was a happy-go-lucky Southern guy with domineering parents,

and bore everyone to death.  

Or you could have him say: 

“Sheesh.  All this sneakin’ around in the woods late at night reminds me of being back in Kansas.  Good times, man, good times.”  There was a pause, before he added,  “‘Course, it wasn’t nearly so fun when I came home late for curfew and had to sleep on the front step, but y’know.  Life happens.”

Isn’t that much better than the omnipresent monotone?

Dialogue is also a great way to fill in potential plot holes early on, by having your characters talk them out and explain them. 

Moreover, dialogue can also be used to foreshadow, offer relevant hints about the climax, or provide information necessary for the resolution.  

So use it wisely!  

4.  Sprinkle in mini-actions throughout. 

Even in actionless dialogue, no one actually does nothing.  In my case, for example, I stim a lot.  I play with my hair.  I play with eating utensils.  It’s probably very annoying for those around me, but you get the point.

Less fidget-y folks might not do this as much, but they rarely sit totally still during conversations, either.  So occasionally add in these mini-actions, and it will make your characters feel a bit less like disembodied voices or floating heads.

For instance:  

Jo leaned back in her chair rolling her stiff neck from sitting still for so long.  “…So the way I see it,” she continued.  “Even if Pheris Beuller’s Day Off didn’t take place in Cameron’s imagination, Pheris was clearly a sociopath whose behavior shouldn’t be glamorized.”

“Ha.  As if.”  Avery paused to sip her root beer.  “Pheris,” she began, raising an index finger.  “Was clearly emblematic of counterculturist movements such as the Beat Generation, and his disregard for the capitalistic dogmas imposed upon younger generations is something to be admired.” 

“For Christ’s sake, will you two lighten up?”  scoffed Leo, counting out bills for the pizza.  “We were talking about which movie we wanted to watch tonight.  Jesus.”

5.  Remember how people actually speak.

In real life conversations, people don’t speak in paragraphs.  Alright, some people might, and this can actually be interesting as the personality aspect of a certain type of character.  

But generally speaking, people don’t speak in paragraphs, or as though they’re writing thought-out prose or letters.

In real conversations, people stutter.  They laugh at their own jokes, repeat words or phrases, and lose their train of thought.

Naturally, you don’t have to illustrate in your writing exactly how chaotic and mundane human speech can be, as writing would be pretty boring in general if it was strictly limited to miming reality.  But it’s good to keep in mind that your characters are talking, not writing in purple prose.

Exhibit A: 

“When I was a young boy, my mother and I had a most tumultuous relationship,” said Marcus.  “She saw me as a hallmark of her past failures, and took every opportunity to remind me as such.”     

Exhibit B:

“My mom, when I was kid, we had what you’d call a sort of tumultuous relationship,” said Marcus.  “Nothing I ever did was right for her.  She, uh – I think she saw me as sort of a hallmark of her past failures.  Took every opportunity to remind me of that.”    

Which of these is more organic, more easy to visualize, and more telling of character?  Unless the point of this dialogue is to illustrate that Marcus is a gentleman crook of some kind with pristine speaking mannerisms, I’m going to say the latter. 


Best of luck, I hope this helps, and happy writing!  <3

Life In The Rockies Things:
  • Some movie needs “Exotic” animal noises for their spooky jungle scene or weird alien planet, but the sound team doesn’t know from animals, so there’s an Elk Bugling somewhere in The Amazon or Qualxon-5
  • Finding out that your sea-level friends start to pass out at 1,000 feet and realizing that you’ll have to meet them at the airport with oxygen cans or something.
  • Somehow forgetting, every year, then unpleasantly remembering after the first cold snap what single-digit humidity feels like when the water evaporates off your eyeballs.
  • No trick-or-treaters because the weather always sucks on Halloween
  • Completely Insane Tourist Questions ™: Large Animals And Geology Does Not Work Like That Edition.
  • Some places have all seasons in a day.  Some have them all in five minutes.  The Rockies have all four seasons in a quantum state where they all occur simultaneously.  Sunados.  Thundersnow. 70-degrees-and-pleasantly-sunny-but-also-hurricane-force-winds.  Having your house be under Drought, Flood, Wildfire and Blizzard warnings at the same time.  The Weather is Real like a deity and also an Asshole.
  • Knowing which choppers are flying into the regional hospital based on how long it takes them to find the damn pad.  Park Service knows what the fuck they’re doing. Air Force is lost as hell and spends like 20 minutes circling the neighborhood.
  • Calling the police becuase the oil-or-gas rig near your house is making weird noises and the company didn’t label it so you have to meet the sherrif in your lot and ride out there with them and hope to god it isn’t a natural gas leak becuase it doesn’t have a smell fresh out of the ground.
  • Bearmaggedon
  • Water-Rights-Related Murder
  • Long winded editorial rants written in Authentic Frontier Gibberish, which is different than Regular Whackadoodle Gibberish.  They attempt to write their accents in and make graphic references to field-dressing.
  • That lovely transcendent feeling you get in the Really High Country where your lungs feel clean and your soul renewed as you look upon the most magnificent landscape in the whole world, you feel like you could wax poetic about Purple Mountains Majesty and then your friend has to grab you because you almost pass out from lack of oxygen and fall off the side of the mountain while the marmots laugh at you.

Okay, so my family’s been watching the weather channel as of late, and my dad’s shipping hurricanes.

HE’S. SHIPPING. HURRICANES!

He’s convinced what’s been going on off the coast is just one big soap opera.

You see, you got Jose, who’s been following Irma around like a lovesick puppy dog. And why not? Irma is a big girl, she’s got a great eye, Cat 4, who wouldn’t want a gal like that? However, Irma didn’t seem to be paying much attention to Jose, the poor guy. And by the time Jose even gets to the coast, Irma’s already gone out to sea and died. The love of his life is gone forever! So what does poor Jose do? He goes out to sea to sulk, only to come back in a post-depressive rage over the loss of his true love! He never got to be with his dear Irma (though honestly Irma was already way out of his league to begin with).

But NOW here comes the real twist. Cuz guess who’s come chasing after Jose?

Maria, Jose’s Cat 5 wife who is not happy at all about him running off to be with another woman. (Literally the MINUTE we heard about Maria my dad shouted, “Oh no Jose was married!” I kid you not he’s serious about this.) 

So Jose’s now running from Maria, who’s big and angry and ready to smack him around like no tomorrow and we’re staying tuned til the next episode of our new favorite show.

My dad’s calling it, “As The Tide Turns”. I have no words except these.

Dating Tom Holland Would Include...

Originally posted by tomhollandisdaddy

ok I couldn’t help myself, sorry I haven’t written in years- but ya enjoy!!

  • alright, like tom would be the sweetest boyfriend don’t even try to fight me lol
  • like he would be such a gentleman 
  • always holding doors for you and pulling out chairs for you and ordering on your behalf and such
  • but he’d also be really cheeky 
  • like he’s not one to shy away from a good prank I feel
  • like he’d hide behind the door and give you a good jump scare or fill your car up with balloons or something- innocent things
  • but like if it ever got too far or if you even got the slightest bit hurt from it, he’d immediately rush over to you and make sure you’re alright
  • the little gymnist would constantly be doing flips and all these cool parkour moves which would make you so worried and on edge
  • “babe, stop, you’re going to hurt yourself”
  • “oh come on, darling, I’m spider-man”
  • and that would be his excuse for everything “darling, I am spider man after all”
  • and yes, his favorite thing to call you would be “darling”
  • and you’d also be worried about him doing some of his own stunts
  • like you’d walk over and he’d be hanging from some cables and casually be like, “oh, hey babe! want to grab some dinner after this?” 
  • taking Tessa on regular walks through the park would probably be one of the highlights of your day because it’d usually just be you and tom
  • and you’d find a quiet spot and just throw some tennis balls out for Tess and relax for a bit, it’d be a great get away from all the flashing cameras and noise
  • hanging out with Tess most of the time in his trailer
  • I feel like your relationship would be kind of private
  • I mean, people would know you’re dating, but you guys wouldn’t flaunt it
  • there may be a couple of pictures of you through out his Instagram feed, but it wouldn’t be overboard
  • and when you do post a picture together, the fans will all go crazy
  • however, on twitter, I feel like you two would get into little witty battles, here and there, and people would take sides and everything
  • but it wouldn’t be anything major, it’d be stupid stuff- like the correct pronunciation for “croissant” or something lol 
  • he’d be dancing all over the place all the time
  • and if you’re not good at dancing he would teach you a move or two and crack up at the amount of rhythm you lack, but he’d find it really cute and endearing
  • teasing him about lip sync battle
  • and sometimes if it’s raining he’ll do a tiny bit of the routine just to make you laugh
  • lots of insiders
  • beach dates
  • you would hang out with Harrison a lot and go to interviews and watch behind the cameras 
  • and Tom would get distracted every now and then with you being right there, and he’d stare off and you’d point your finger to the interviewer and signal at him to focus back, even though it’s really cute 
  • seeing the world while joining him on press tour every now and then
  • sneaking him off set every once in a while to grab a bite to eat or go adventuring and putting him in an elaborate disguise 
  • waking up to him making a nice cup of tea and breakfast every morning
  • having spider man merch lying all over the house because tom can’t help himself
  • and every time you’re at target and pass the toy isle where all the action figures are and the masks are, he’ll stop and shout “hey, look it’s me!!” 
  • sweet little kisses 
  • planning the future together
  • “what if our kid prefers superman?”
  • “then we’ll send them off to military school” 
  • obviously being his date to red carpet events and ceremonies 
  • and he’d always be very nervous and making sure you’re alright because all the flashing cameras, rude reporters, and screaming fans are a bit much
  • cheering him on in the crowd when he’s up for an award
  • and you being one of the first people he thanks in his speeches
  • if you aren’t from England and he’s near your home town for press tour or comic con, you take him all around town and show him where you grew up and share funny stories about each of your stops
  • him getting on great with your family, who can’t get enough of him
  • going over to see his family on holidays, who absolutely adore you
  • one of his brothers will probably have a not so secret crush on you and you jokingly threaten tom to leave him for them 
  • you being his whole world and him constantly talking about you in interviews
  • also lots of rumors about you guys getting married, having a baby, or breaking up, but you just tune those out 
  • lots of movie nights at his place which lead to you guys crashing out on the couch 
  • stealing his clothes
  • him whispering sweet nothings in your ear
  • and Harrison screaming “get a room”
  • lots of “I love you’s” 

let me know if you want a part 2 lol 

Being Justin's best friend and dating Zach would include...

•Justin is very close with your family because obviously his isn’t great

•He’s introduced you to some of the best people in your life. (Zach being one of them)

•Justin hugging you constantly

•Play wrestling is a constant with you two

•Everyone thinks you two have hooked up, but you never have.

•You’ve kissed playfully though.

•All of his girlfriends have gotten insecure about you. Including Jess, who’s your friend as well.

•People think it’s weird that y'all cuddle but you guys have been doing it since you were five so???

•When Zach first met you he saw you at your most comfortable. You were hot tubbing with Justin at Bryce’s.

•Plus Justin was Uber protective.

•Zach had classes with you at the middle school you both went to but he’d never noticed you really

•Back to the first time you met, it’s middle school, hormones are high, and you’re in a bikini

•Long story short, Zach has to leave the hot tub after just a few minutes.

•Even after you get together, and after high school, no one ever lets him live down that little Zachy had to leave because of an unwarranted boner

•After you break up with Montgomery De La Cruz, for his cheating and his constant need to get into fights. Justin sees how lonely you are.

•He’s always wanted you to date Zach, the purest of his friends.

•"Ya know, Zach’s single. I think he’d take you on a date.“

•"As a favor to you? No thanks.”

•Zach starting to talk to you and sit by you at random times during the school day.

•"how much is Justin paying you?“

•"paying me? Think higher of yourself, Y/N”

•Zach convincing you to study with him at his house after a week of this.

•Justin’s right, you two hit it off

•Justin ALWAYS crashing your dates

•when you say things referring to “your man” from the stands at basketball games, they both look up.

•Justin shipping you two even more after Zach shuts Bryce’s comments about you down.

•Zach being the kind of boyfriend that wants to know fun facts and opinions you have.

•"I really don’t think Zach will ever know more about you than me.“

•"You have a ten year advantage”

•Zach’s mom repeatedly talking to Justin about your relationship. She’s protective, like him. They get info from each other.

•"he’s in love with her, Justin.“

•"good. Because she loves him”

•Justin looking like the third wheel

•But you, justin, and Zach all think of yourselves as the third wheel when it’s just you three hanging out together.

•"Id do anything for her, Justin"

•"Better stay that way, Dempsey"

AHHHHH hope you guys liked these. Keep requesting :)

Don't take my lawn decorations.

I had purchased my first home in a slightly lower class area of town, which is pretty close to an even lower class area of town. (Think slightly ghetto a mile from absolute trailer trash.) I know most of my immediate neighbors, since most of them are pretty loud and I’d rather be friendly with them than have them be my enemy.

Some local kid likes to go around collecting trash in his free time. A real nice kid, does it for really no reason. Whenever I see him, I usually get him a drink, lemonade or soda so he can stay hydrated. (California is hot.) Sometimes I give him a few dollars, I offer the kid $30 a month to mow my lawn 2x a month. So, kid has a gig for small, but consistent income.

The kid takes a lot of pride in his work. He mows the lawn, pulls weeds, moves rocks out of the driveway, and just makes my place look extra nice, even though I don’t even ask him to do any extra work. This guy is great.

This goes on for a few years, kid is now a senior in highschool. Family is not doing so great, dad just lost his main source of income, and mom had accumulated debt which put a lot of stress on their failing marriage. Mom was abusive verbally and sometimes physically to both the kid, and the Father. But the kid keeps on walking, doing work, volunteering and being a real happy, up beat dude.

Despite his troubles at home, the kid starts buying lawn decorations. Mostly small, little gnomes, some decorative rocks, and bird bath, and he decorates my yard. It looks amazing, but I knew he must have spent a lot of his own money on that. I try to reimburse him, and he denies. He won’t take it.
I know he needs a car, and I was about to get a newer one for myself, so I gave my mine for free. It really was the least I could do for this guy for everything he has done for me.

A few weeks later, a drunk driver T bones the kid, and he dies on the scene. I was devastated, his parents were devastated, and they soon after got a divorce.

They were fighting over who gets what, and the father discovers that the mother had a drug addiction she had been hiding. Straight out of left field. She wants everything they had, and she lawyers up to fight the battle. Due to the debt the mother had accumulated on the father’s bank account, he had really no money. And nobody knew where she got her money from.
As sad as it is, it’s not my affair. Until she sent me a letter claiming that the yard decorations are rightfully hers, and that she will take them “or else”. Now, this is a problem.

I get it, you lost your only child. You’re in a lot of pain as a parent. But you were never a good parent to him. I was closer to him than you, by a long shot.
So, I had a meeting with the father, and told him not to worry about the court costs. I decided I was going to fund him in court.

Long story short about their divorce battle, but he wins, and gets to keep everything, and even gets a restraining order on her. He then files for credit card fraud, and puts all the debt on her.

I heard from the father that she was recently arrested for driving while drunk, and was search and has a decent stash of meth on her. She is currently awaiting trial for that, while the father is living a life now relatively stress free.
And I got to keep my lawn decorations.
RIP Johnathan. You are missed.