guys and their pets

More Watertribe Lance
Also avatar Lance this time because we talked about this with friends and we are lance trash we wondered what kind of pet Lance would have if he was the avatar… Like Aang has Appa and Korra has Naga.

And we ended up with a Peacock-Lion because it just suits him perfectly

(also it was supposed to be Keith’s pet -bc yeah it’s definitely more a firenation-ish beast- but things happened ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) i’ll write headcanons someday lmao)

Newt Scamander: Every Zoo is a petting zoo if you try hard enough.

Everyone else: NO.

On lists of “words to replace ‘said’”

stop. 

Replacing “said” is this trend apparently, either Snobby Writers or misled schoolteachers are telling you that using this word is bad. Using it improperly is bad, i.e.: 


“I’m going to work,” John said. 

“Okay,” Maria said. “See you later.” 

“Bye,” John said.

That is bad writing, But it’s bad writing for a number of reasons, and if you replace every instance of “said” with “hopped angrily”, it’s still bad writing. Using the word said, or any replacement thereof, is supposed to be done sparingly, i.e.: 

“I’m going to work,” John said, reaching for his coat.

Maria didn’t look at him. Instead, she kept her eyes focused on her bowl of cereal, shifting the spoon aimlessly. “Okay.” 

He sighed, shaking his head, shrugging the coat on and opening the door. He paused, turning his head over his shoulder. 

“Bye.” 

Silence. 

Relying on said, or any other verb, is bad writing when you’re relying on it to tell the story happening around it. But I argue that when you must use an descriptive verb like that, 75% of the time you should use ‘said’. Do you know why? 

When it isn’t every other word, you don’t even notice ‘said’. 

I find that most of the time, a ‘more creative’ synonym for that word jars the reader and breaks suspension of disbelief. Instead of thinking about what’s happening ,they’re thinking “oh, that’s different”. 

And while it might be novel for a second, I don’t care about being novel. I care about suspension of disbelief. 

So there, that’s why the endless river of tumblr posts decrying the use of the word said really irritate me, because high school English teachers and snotty English students have decided to tell the unwashed masses that using a perfectly useful tool in your writing arsenal is bad just because They Say So. 

taz characters as comments from a reddit thread about drunk people @ parties

Taako: “Someone went through the house and stole every lightbulb in the house. The owner was passed out at this point. The person was dedicated, even took the bulb from the fridge”

Lup: “A guy kept feeding the bathtub fire until the tv ten feet away melted”

Barry: “My friend has a recording of me sulking over a girl years ago and I said, ‘I’m gonna kill myself in half’”

Merle: “We found our friend (who we had lost earlier) at Denny’s, at 4 in the morning, in a prayer circle with some random family”

Magnus: “A friend of mine was extremely drunk and saw this guy walking his dog. My friend started petting the dog and when the owner asked him to stop he started petting the man instead.”

Davenport: “The host got belligerently drunk, forgot who he’d shook hands with/talked to, and spent the rest of the night making rounds shaking everyone’s hand at least half a dozen times before passing out.”

Lucretia: “After last call, she asked if we were still open. When I told her no, she thanked me for my service and my kindness. When I turned my back, she grabbed a half empty bottle of champagne an earlier customer had left and poured herself a large to-go cup of champagne and walked out. ”

Carey: “Someone stole my friends front door, just ripped if off the hinges and ran down the street”

Killian: “I broke 3 glasses within an hour of each other. Kind of wasn’t my fault but still got forced to drink of a plastic cup for the rest of the night.”

Angus: “Idk I’m 12”

a list of Dream Daddy Plot Twists™ that are better than the Cult Ending plot twist (spoilers):

• Damien being an IT guy that volunteers at pet shelters and wears glasses
• Hugo being a huge wrestling fan
• Brian never actually wanting to compete at dad stuff but just awkwardly trying to impress MC all the time
• Robert’s child being a gorgeous businesswoman with a girlfriend
• the weed that Mat and MC bought actually being oregano
• literally anything else

Reasons why Damien is the true dream daddy

- trans representation without it being the biggest aspect of who he is/used for comedic effect

- cute dork

- he prints naruto fanfics and binds them in worn book covers to look classy

- he’s actually super sweet and deep

- he has a very loving relationship with his son and cares deeply for him

- he’s scared of horror movies awh

- he really worries about his image

- he loves flowers and old fashioned things, but he doesn’t have a superiority complex about it

- HE VOLUNTEERS AT A PET SHELTER GUYS CMON

- DAMIEN FREAKING BLOODMARCH

The Most ANNOYING kinds of episodes on Property Brothers

Scenario 1:

“Hi I’m Husband and I’m a High School teacher, this is Wife, she’s a stay-at-home mom. We’re looking for a place in the city closer to work. Our max budget is $900,000

Me:

Scenario 2

“Our dream home is 3 floor detached with a view in the city with 5 bedrooms, open concept chef’s kitchen, an ensuite with a claw foot cast iron tub, marble countertops and fireplaces, all new appliances, high end finishes, high ceilings, and custom walk-in closets. Our budget is $75.”

Me:

Scenario 3

Jonathan: I always budget 10% contingency money.

Couple: Does that mean we can get our custom walk-in his and her closets?!

Me: 

Scenario 4

Jonathan: So this house is basically a blank slate. There are no walls so you can see everything, no kitchen , no finishes. The demo is pretty much done. And with the place at $500,000 market value, you have about $120,000 for renovation. You can pretty much do whatever you want.

Couple: …mmm I don’t know Jonathan… we’re not really looking to go through another renovation 

Me: WELL IT’S A GOOD THING YOU’RE ON PROPERTY BROTHERS