Stop it, just stop it.

If I had a nickle for every girl I’ve seen with a line about being awkward on their profile, I’d have a really weird way of making money. 

You’re not socially awkward because you can’t help it, you just do stupid shit. If you’re walking around talking in stupid voices and saying “meow” and “rawr” like it’s going out of style then I hope you get hit by a car.

You’re such a self proclaimed “nerd” yet outside of what stereotypical nerds in movies do, you have absolutely no idea about anything that you’re talking about. Here’s a tip, owning your dad’s NES and playing Mario doesn’t make you a nerd. I don’t think there is anyone under 30 in a first world country that hasn’t played some Mario game.

You get shows on that shitbox MTV enforcing these stupid people now too. Ever seen that show “My life as liz”? That girl is the embodiment of everything I hate.

“Lololol I have friends that are mostly boys but I’m a girl. I like starwars things, even though I clearly know nothing about the story other than pop culture references. BOBA FETT HELMET LOLOLOL. Did I mention I’m a girl? That’s right I’m a girl that likes starwars, and has friends who are stereotypical nerds. How quirky is that?”

Don’t just get out, die.

Weeaboos are the final evolution of annoying, legendary status even. They are offensive to all of the senses, even senses we haven’t discovered humans possess yet.

Text book weeaboos are weird in that they seem to exhibit a form of backwards racism. Instead of putting another group of people down they long to be apart of another group of people and think their own is inferior. 

You have your lesser weeaboos too, though they don’t deserve any less of a savage beating than their more annoying cousins. I can’t tell you how many times my ire has been invoked by some troglodyte thinking they’re clever by using a couple Japanese words in the middle of an English sentence.

Here’s acceptable times to use Japanese.

1. In Japan

2. Speaking to someone who also speaks Japanese

If you think you’re being smart by throwing “Baka” or “Kawaii” or even “Desu” into whatever moronic thing that’s being blurted from your idiot mouth, then please, locate the nearest CD, or DvD, break it in half, and then slit your wrists. Adding “Chan” or “San” to the names of people doesn’t even make sense. You’re not speaking Japanese so what good does using honorifics do?

People that pronounce their name the way it would be pronounced in Japanese probably piss me off the most. You’re saying it the incorrect way on purpose. Even speaking in fluent Japanese you’re still mispronouncing your name by talking like that. They don’t have several English letter sounds in their vocabulary so they just have to roll with it, you, however, know better. Talking like that makes just as much sense as a person from Germany dropping the umlaut from their name because we don’t use that in English.

And don’t you dare start saying Nyan instead of whatever sound a cat makes in your country.

Don’t. You. Fucking. Dare.

I’m sick of seeing people that have apparently never been on the internet before trying to fit internet slang into all of their sentences and using the word “Troll” incorrectly. 

Every time you post an opinion and someone believes the exact opposite of what you do they are not “Trolling.”

If someone is deliberately trying to provoke you into having an emotional response by saying or doing something that they are aware will make you feel angry then they are in fact trolling you.

It’s better not to use the word at all if you aren’t 100% sure what it is you’re talking about. 

If you don’t have the time, or just simply don’t feel like putting the effort required, then don’t cosplay at all. 

Lazy cosplays are giving everyone in the scene a bad image. For every 1 terrible cosplay it takes 10 amazing ones to make up for it. 

If you are just going to go buy an orange jumpsuit, and a blonde wig, and call yourself Naruto, then stay home. Why are you even dressing up if you apparently don’t care about how you look at all?

Also, please cosplay within your limits. If you’re 300lbs and 4'11" why are you trying to dress as Alucard? No matter how much effort you put into it you’re going to look awkward and it’s just not going to flow. 

P.S. stop dressing as Naruto and Ichigo. I swear to Christ every con has a group photo of 15 Narutos standing together. I understand Naruto is your favorite show but the point is to be original, and to stand out. If the only anime you watch comes on Cartoon network and Adult swim then you really shouldn’t be there in the first place.

You’re a god damn moron. If you feel like you’re to old or it’s not cool to go trick or treating anymore then just don’t go.

If I was generous enough to give out candy I’d have three separate categories. 

One bowl would be full sized candy bars, and other things. This great candy would be for people who I could tell put a lot of work into their costumes, or if I just happened to really like them. 

The second bowl would be the normal junk people give out for all the average costumes.

The third bowl would be candy with razor blades and poison in them for all the dumb ass 15 year olds walking around with without a costume on.

Are you people fucking handicapped? I don’t even know what to say. Honestly I didn’t think people were ignorant enough to actually believe that, then I did a little google searching and found a bunch of forum posts disproving my previous convictions.

Inspired by my muse

Who had this to say about the subject.

“Fuck off. Fuck RIGHT off. Forever. HNNNG”

I couldn’t have said it better myself. Except I did, sorry, I’m just that great.